It's Ralph Reed's Party, Stupid
Issue #49

Rush Limba - Lying Nazi Whore

It was the news that shocked the world.

I'm sure you've all heard it by now.
According to NASA, there are indications that there is
evidence that could lead to the conclusion that there
are possible building blocks of the signs of life
in the Dole campaign.

More on this shocking news as it developes.

Ralph Reed gave Bob Dole permission to ask Jack Kemp
if he'd be willing to lose at his side in this election.

Kemp is the first smart move Dole's made so far.

Colin Powell clears his throat..., straightens his tie,
and walks to the podium to give his biggest speech ever.
His ears catch the thunderous ovation from the crowd.
These are HIS people - Republicans.

As he waits for the applause to die down, Powell,
a black man, looks for other blacks in the audience.
His eyes scan the Republican Party loyalists at the
massive San Diego Convention Center.

He looks around and sees JC Watts, from Oklahoma.
He sees....
He sees no other blacks.

Geez, there's got to be more than 1 black person....
Is that right?
There's only one black Republican in Congress?

Wow! Only one black Republican,
and he's from....... Oklahoma?

(Something tells me he played football.
Football trumps race in Oklahoma.
If he can beat Texas and Nebraska, a black man
can get a job AND have the Governor's daughter.)

Powell's eyes continue to scan.... nothing.
There's GOTTA be another black Republican,
..gotta be...

...but there's not.

Suddenly, Colin wonders why he's here.
"Shit," he wonders. "Why am I in this party?"
He's pro-choice, that not Republican.
He's pro-affirmative action, that's not GOP.
He's pro-safety net for the poorest Americans.
He's for gun control, that's not Republican.
He's certainly not anti-black, like Clarence Thomas.

As the applause begins to die down, Colin wonders why
the GOP has always been so enamored of him.
The Gulf War brought him fame, but why the warm GOP embrace?
"This is the Party of Exclusion," he tells himself.
"This party is no friend to African-Americans."

The great hall is silent - waiting for his first words.
The epiphany suddenly staring him in the face, Powell says
"Good Evening. I'm voting for Clinton" and walks away.

RL-LNW will not fuel the rumors that Kemp is gay,
even thought the Internet is wild with speculation.
We think it's awful to even bring it up.
Kemp's sexual orientation is none of our business.
This election isn't about personal sexuality.

Shame on those rumor-mongers.

Ralph Reed has withdrawn Dole's invitation for Gov Wilson
and Gov Weld to speak at the convention.
You see, they're pro-choice.

Pro-choicers can't speak at Ralph Reed's convention.

Maybe now, Rush and the right will stop whining about
former Governor Casey of Pennsylvania. If you've noticed,
it's impossible to say the word "abortion" around the
religious right without hearing Casey's name mentioned.

Besides that "snub," has Casey EVER been mentioned?
For any reason?

You watch.
Every time abortion comes up, you'll hear Casey's name.
It's Pavlovian with the Coathanger Coalition.

At one time, Wilson was talked about as a possible VP.
Now, he can't even be trusted with a microphone.

.and it's Wilson's home state,
and Ralph Reed won't let him speak.

Great Rush Quotes

"In the Republican Party, abortion is a 50/50 issue,
with most people against it."

I don't know much about fashion, but I thought Dole
looked much better before Ralph Reed inserted the
giant metal ring with the letters "C.C." in his nose.

Funny Rush Quotes

"The Democrats are so nervous, they're in abject panic."
Sure thing, Rush.

We ALWAYS panic when we're 24 points ahead.

A Harrisburg, Pennsylvania man was sentenced to
five minutes probation, swear to Koresh, for punching
a man who was screwing his wife in the mouth.
Wait, that doesn't sound right.
He punched the man in the mouth.

I've never heard of 5 minutes probation, have you?

It was a different story in Oklahoma. A Tulsa man came
home to find his wife in bed with a man, so he shot him
in the stomach and was arrested.

It read so funny in the paper:
"He was (having sex with) my wife, for Christ's sake."

The paper named them and even mentioned where they worked.
RL-LNW predicts an innocent verdict.

No matter who Dole chose,
Rush was going to say "He's the PERFECT candidate."
.and he will.

Dole said he'd "undo the economic damage" Clinton has
done to our economy. A quick look at the record would
show Clinton is the first President of the 20th Century
to NOT have a recession in his presidency.

Dole is telling the truth!
President Dole would reverse our economy's direction.

News reports say the Republican's will have tight security
at their convention. They have magnometers to detect guns
at every door. Once the unarmed people are in,
they'll tell the TV cameras how good guns are,
and why we should have more guns on the streets.

Funny, guns are good, but they won't allow them?
I wonder why that is?

They'll also have bomb-sniffing dogs. Why is that?
The party of bombers isn't going to bomb itself.

When Hezbollah meets, do they search themselves?
I doubt it.

When Islamic Jihad meets, do they search themselves?
I doubt it.

They're also putting up barricades so nobody can park
a Ruder truck near the building - YET - YET,
Dole's screaming for Clinton to re-open Pennsylvania
Avenue so Ryder trucks can park near the White HOuse.

Hey BOB!
Explain yourself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In you want Ryder trucks parking by the White House,
why can't they park next to your little convention?

Playing politics is one thing, Bob.
But calling for less security for our President
shows intense hatred or insanity, take your pick.

I just watched Dole announce Kemp as his VP on CNN.
They asked former President Ford if Kemp would call
the shots, or would Dole call his own shots.
Ford said "I know them both - intimately."
Hey, now!

Ford said "Dole makes his own decisions."
If Dole can't get his abortion wording in the platform,
if Dole can't get his assault weapon opinion in the
platform, if Dole is taking orders from Ralph Reed now,
why should America believe he'll change as President?

Fifty years ago, Dole was a very brave man.
I wonder why he scares so easily now?

August 2nd, Rush ridiculed Clinton's suggestion that a
second 911-type number is needed to ease congestion.

August 9, AP reported that 911 gridlock caused a delay
in warning Olympic Park about the pipe bomb.

Rush Limba - documented right all the time....

Columnist Richard Reeves reports that Europeans
are comparing the American Olympic chant of
"USA! USA! USA!" to 1936's Hitler and "Sieg Heil!"

Hold on a doggone minute, Europe!
Words MEAN things!
You'd better be able to back that UP!

How can you say America is fascist?
Webster says fascism is "fierce nationalism, and the
supression of liberals, unions and minorities."

OK, so the "USA! USA! USA!" chants MIGHT be wrongly
considered "fierce nationalism" by some non-Americans,
but if America is full of Nazi's, show me the
"supression of liberals, unions and minorities."


The 104th Congress?

Are you sure?

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