Subject: Even More about the Clinton Vandalism

Monday we were told that the "W's" had been removed from computer keyboards.
America was supposed to get outraged, but America laughed or didn't care.

So on Thursday we were told that there was graffiti, the cutting of phone lines, etc.
not to mention filthy, perverted words such as "major league asshole" being left on answering machines.
We weren't outraged the first time, so a few days later the story got better.

You are correct in asking the question, "Why did this take so many days to come to light?"

I'm guessing there was some good-natured pranksterism going on--I do believe that "W.s"
were removed and hidden.  And the Republicans were outraged--the way that Major Frank Burns
used to think that Hawkeye hiding his socks might cause us to lose the war.

We've been down this road many, many times before.  We'll find out that what
really happened is someone removed the amplifier from a telephone and hid it
in a desk, and the "W's" were hidden on top of door jambs and the rest of
the story was Republican Lying Accusation #3,886,493.  Then the GOP will
say, "Never mind." We'll forget the story for six months and then punks like
Limbaugh, Hannity, and O'Reilly will sneak it into their diatribes in the
future even though they know it's not true.

We are using government resources on this accusation, and if the accusations
are not true I want the accusers, fired, fined and jailed.

I'll go farther than that.
I want the people who caused $200,000 damage to go to jail.
Hiding a "W" key is silly horseplay, but hundreds of thousands of dollars in damage
should be paid for the same was a broken windshield or a blown up mailbox is.


Subject: Greenspan

TO: News Media Whores

For years I preached that that we needed to pay down the Federal debt.  During those nasty Clinton years I used that story to forced the Democrats to pass a tax increase.  But, just like my preaching that unemployment under 4.0% and economic growth rates over 3.0% would cause inflation, it was all just bullshit.  I don't really know what I'm talking about, I just wanted to have an unpopular tax increase passed by Democrats so we could use it against them and put God's party back in the White House.  But, despite my best efforts, those evil Clintonista's somehow turned the tax increase into the greatest economic boom this country has ever seen. I didn't know what I was talking about then but, after speaking with President Bush, I now know that we cannot afford to pay down the debt and that we must have massive tax cuts now.


Subject: Smirk's Dreams

Hey, did you hear about Dubya and his dreams?

On the first night he dreamed George Washington came to see him,
and Dubya asked him, "What should I do to help the country?"

Washington said, "Tell the truth in all things and it will work out."

The next night Thomas Jefferson came in his dream and dubya said,
"What should I do to help the country?"

Jefferson said, "Try to hear the voice of the people."

On the third night, Lincoln entered his dream, and Dubya trembled and asked,
"What should I do to help the country?"

Lincoln replied,
" How about going to a play?"


Subject: oh, bartcop...

You know, I was with you on the reply to the angry woman re: Catherine Zeta Jones,
until you decided to define hysteria for us.

Ouch, man, ouch.

I defined hysteria?
You can't think I have the brains to trace the entomology of that word on my own.
That was Merriam-Webster's definition.
If the shoe fits Angela's foot, can I be blamed for that?

That disses the rest of us right along with her; only women *could* get hysterics, supposedly...
and it was used to define, most likely, any woman who stood up for herself and got upset,
or just lost it after decades as one or another man's legal property.

I don't agree with your emailer, but could you maybe have not put her down
in a way that dismisses her reaction as something intrinsically female?

She was hysterical.
She asked for a picture of my gipper.
She deserved some putting-down.

'Cause people like me, who just shrugged and went, "Fine, some guys don't like pregnant women
as eye candy, and CZJ can't really act," at your movie review, could feel kinda maarginalized and
condescended to, even though we didn't do anything.

And that was a request, not a demand.  :)


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