Vol 170 - To Murder a Mockingbird

February 17, 2000

Mail Bag

From:  astod@frontiernet.net

Subject:   Attacking McCain

Dear Bartcop,

I am not a believer in conspiracy theories, but in reading all the
negative rumours and articles about McCain, I am beginning to see a pattern.
All the tactics they've used against Clinton are now being used against McCain.
Maybe Hillary had it right after all.

The right wing does not want McCain because they cannot control him like they do Bush.
Myself , I would like to see Bush win the nomination to see what he really is;
An empty suit, and Gore would win in a landslide.
McCain may be a little harder to beat.


Gore couldn't lose this race if he hired Dole's staff.
Gore couldn't lose this race with Indiana Spud at the controls.

Yes, McCain is a better man than Smirk.
So am I, but you don't want me for president..

 Kenneth Starr

 From: rotate172@hotmail.com

> "...the public, however -- people are really smart, you know, and it's pretty hard
to convince them that they should hold anyone responsible for someone else's mistake,
particularly a personal mistake....If you think somebody made a mistake, you can't
blame everybody else for a mistake somebody made."
       -- President Clinton, February 16th, 2000 press conference.

Does this mean we shouldn't blame Ken Starr for that German parade float?

No, we MUST blame Starr for taking a simple, semi-affair and turning it into
the biggest constitutional crisis of our time, that son-of-a-bitch.

That's what the GOP stands for: Sex police!
The GOP - party of Linda Tripp and Luci the Bat!
The GOP - party of Paula Jones and Larry Klayman.
The GOP - party of Barr, Burton, Livingston and Gingrich, all of whom were diddling
someone besides their wives while screaming at Clinton's "immoral behavior.".

Remember, Clinton tried to hide that semi-affair, but the GOP fanned every spark they could.
Oh, Christ, the fun they had!

They called thousands of hours of senseless hearings, and for what reason?
So they could get the Supreme Court to give them the OK to lower Clinton's zipper,
and reach inside his pants with their hands, and fish around for his goddamn cock.

That doesn't disgust you?

FOR TWO YEARS the Republicans grabbed at Clinton's cock!
That's all they did for two long fucking years, over the objection of the people.
They said our system of government depended on Clinton's cock.
They said "the flag is falling" over the Clinton cock matter.
They said Clinton's cock determined "the rule of law."

That doesn't disgust you?

Please, ...Koresh, ...let Smirk win so we can get our revenge.
Our revenge will be a bitch worse than Kato Burn.

 Has anybody heard about the new America Politics Journal print issue?

 They said it would be out in mid-February,
 but now I hear it's been out for weeks.

 Can anybody confirm?

 Sabutai Speaks

 From: sabutai@ix.netcom.com

 Subject: George is just Mean

 Hey Bartcop:
 It is begining to become apparent that the Bush campaign will do
 whatever is necessary to get ahead in the GOP race for the Presidency.

 - Appearing at Bob Jones University and Terrorist Training Center.
 - Doing really nasty push polling,
 - Wrapping himself in the racist philosophy of the KKK on the Confedrate Flag issue.

 Hey, Fratboy, answer me this:
 You claim to be guided by your faith, well,
 What Would Scooby Do?

 We all know that Jesus is a registered Democrat.
 God is a card carrying Union member.
 Why does the GOP always seem to be so freakin clueless
 on the major issues that effect the lives of voters?


 Great True Quotes

 Normally in presidential primaries, moderate candidates get pushed to
 the fringe by the positions taken by their opponents. George W. Bush, though,
 has done it all on  his own.  Without John McCain taunting him to take
 harder positions, the Texas governor has moved so far  right in Carolina,
 you'd think his core constituents are dead members of the Confederate army.

   -- Richard Cohen, Washington Post

ha ha

Trust me - Click Here

Lose Weight - Fast & Easy - It's Free

Just read this before meal time.

What Kind of Man is Al Gore?

From: abigayle@surfsouth.com

Subject: President Gore

Hi, Bartcop; this is Abigayle, one of your original readers (since '96.)
Mr. Gore came to see us today in S. Georgia while we were crawling out
from the tornado wreckage. I met him for the second time (1st time was the
'92 bus tour). He is really a class guy. He looks at right you and listens to what
you have to say. We didn't lose anybody and our house wasn't hit too bad.

But we've got 22 people dead down here and over a hundred homeless,
and who came down here to see about us??
Mr. Gore.

Bartcop, he walked right up to those people with no clothes, no house, crawled
through the bricks and wood and hugged and cried with us like it was his own family.
Al Gore is my man.

Like my dad said: " I don't see any of those other arrogant bastards seeing about us.
If anybody says ANY of that stupid conservative monkey shit about Al Gore in my presence,

....and my dad is usually as good as his word.


Less Spending?

Gov. Smirk has spent $50,000,000 so far and all he has to show for it
is a Delaware primary victory and that's because McCain didn't show up.

If he becomes the leader of our country,
can we expect these spending habits to change?

 ...and they call themselves "Christians?"

Click HERE for the Full Story

The most vicious attack on McCain is a whisper campaign about his character,
fueled by an e-mail letter making its way around the state from Richard Hand,
who teaches law and Bible studies at Bob Jones University.

The letter criticizes McCain's record, and falsely alleges that he sired two children
out of wedlock before marrying his first wife.
(Sounds like the Uncle O.J. Watts story, except Watt's story is true!)
Professor Hand said he sent the e-mail to his daughter and about a dozen friends,
suggesting they pass it on to others.

Hand said he learned recently that McCain did not father the children in question,
and that he sent a corrected version of his e-mail.

But by then, the original was part of the underground political culture.

"Before you read the next story, I'd like to ask a question:
  Are there any McCain backers reading this? "

From:   clell.harmon@worldnet.att.net

Subject:  I support McCain...

        Damn Betcha.

"I'd like to print some letters from Republicans for McCain and get
your reaction to Rush attacking John McCain day after day after day."

        Well I for one wonder how many votes McCain would get if
he slapped the dog shit out of the Rotund Rabbi of the Radical Right.
He could always claim 'Post Traumatic Stress,' and hey, it would just be fun.
It would also be a lot of work.
Slapping the dog shit out of Rush would take awhile.
John had best bring a lunch.

"I know you GOPers think it's funny when Pigboy attacks Clinton,
or Jocelyn Elders or Jesse Jackson or Barney Frank or Ron Brown,
but how does it feel when he attacks someone on your side? "

        Not at all.  Limbaugh is a lying sack of shit.  You know it, I know it,
hell even Limbaugh knows it.  Don't make the Limbaughesque mistake of thinking
that all of your political opponents are in lockstep.  Not all Republicans are Limbots
(very few are for that matter).  Hell, by definition no McCain supporter IS a Limbot.
This would require independent thought and failure to follow the edicts of the Giver Of Shade.

"How does it feel to have your hero, ...your God, (don't deny it)"

Don't make me smack you.
That gutless son of a bitch isn't even a REAL conservative.  (But then nether am I)

"use his considerable skills to attack McCain with the most unfair,
frivolous, petty and mean-spirited, unfounded, horseshit charges?
I can't imagine what that's like - to live and breathe Pigboy's Nazi hate,
then turn around and be burned by it when he attacks a war hero."

Limbaugh is going to be burning in hell soon enough.  Johnny US McCain isn't the type
to forgive and forget easily.  When he's the nominee, Fat Ass will have some kissing up to do.

This message was sent to you via email in much the same way bricks aren't.

Good to hear from you...

Mail Bag

From: PUcK557@aol.com

Subject: Stupid People

Bartcop, the stupidest argument people have been coming up with as to why
Butch should be elected is "he is governor of Texas, and Texas is the biggest state."

Who gives a fuck?!
Wow, Texas is the biggest state.
That doesn't mean its governor can't be a braindead crack-addict.

Look at Russia.
They are the biggest country, but their leader was a big, fat, stupid alcoholic.

Wait a minute.
Big, fat,stupid, alcoholic?

Was I just describing Yeltsin or Butch?

Fun Quotes

"I don't owe Paula Jones nothing.
 She didn't want to take my money.
 I gave her the check, she gave it back to me."
 -- Abe Hirshfeld, fighting another Paula Jones lawsuit.

I wonder why these sluts don't just get a goddamn job instead of
constantly trying to suck money out of the Democratic Party.

Will Smirk to do America what he did to Texas?

The Children's Rights Council, a separate, nonpartisan advocacy group,
ranked Texas 48th this year on the list of the best states in which to rear children.

The state was ranked 29th before Bush took office in 1995.

February 16, 2000

It's Not His Fault!


The development of syphilitic gummatous tumours in the brain had been known about
but the relationship of syphilis to far more insidious nervous disease was not assumed.
This could take the form of locomotor ataxia or tabes dorsalis, a wasting disease of the
spinal cord characterised by 'lightning pains' and effects on walking, or paresis or general
paralysis of the insane, a organic disorder of the brain which accounted for many of the
patients in nineteenth century lunatic asylums. While those who succumbed to these long-term
consequences might have had an episode of syphilis in youth, medical thinking tended to identify
related lifestyle factors with the development of manifest mental and nervous disorder.


The DALLAS MORNING NEWS is alleging in Thursday editions that Smirk
illegally used cash from his governor's campaign account to fuel his presidential bid!

NEWS reporters Wayne Slater and Susan Feeney write that certain consultants associated
with the Smirk campaign were paid for work done in 1999 from the governor account.

"As governor, Bush collected contributions in an account to be used for political activities in Texas.
 Once he announced for president on March 8, he opened a separate account for
 presidential contributions and expenses.

Bush's gubernatorial account paid Maverick Media nearly $50,000 last year for video production
  -- $25,575 in August, records show."

Maverick is run by Mark McKinnon who is Bush's chief media consultant and is currently in
charge of producing Bush's television ads.

"The governor spent nearly $60,000 in 1999 on consultants, mostly to chief strategist Karl Rove
of Austin. Both Rove and McKinnon were consultants for Bush's gubernatorial race in 1998 and
last year joined the presidential team."

Bush spokesman Scott McClellan denies any impropriety, saying that the consultants, McKinnon
and Rove included, were paid for consulting Bush in his gubernatorial capacity.

McClellan states that the $25,575 was spent for video work for the governor's
1999 inauguration -- an event which was held eight months earlier.

 Can I Quote You on That, Governor?

 From:  bushwatch.com

 Subject: yes, yes

 South Carolina Debate.
 Excerpts of  2/15/00 Bush Remarks, in order.

"Let me speak to that
 ...Let me speak to that.
 ...Let me speak to that...
 ...Let me--let me answer that
 ...Let me say something, John.
 ...Let me finish.
 ...Let me finish
 ...Let me finish please, please
 ...Let me finish. Let me finish...
 ...Let  me say what I said
 ...Let me just say one thing
 ...Let me say one thing about this business, John
 ...But let me say something
 ...Let me finish
 ...Let me say one thing about this
 ...Let me finish...Please let me finish, John
 ...John, let me finish, let me finish
 ...May I finish, please?
 ...May I finish, please?
 ...Let me say one thing else...
    (off-mike) He had a long time
 ...Let me stop
 ...One thing and then he can speak
 ...Let me finish
 ...Let me finish
 ...Let me finish. Let me finish
 ...Let me say something about all this business
 ...John, you're
 ...John, if I, look
 ...John, hey John, one thing is
 ...Wait a minute...Yes...Yes."

 --Politex, Bush Watch


 Business Opportunity

 What if this shaggy bunch came to you a few years ago
 and said they had a sure-fire product, guaranteed to make lots of money
 and could you loan them $10,000 to get their company off the ground?

 The clue is at the bottom left.

 Someday, before you know it, he'll be gone.

 Click Here

 Mail Bag

 From: ceetee99@hotmail.com

 Subject: Rush

 Did you catch Rush claiming he had never heard of Molly Ivins
 and had no idea what "The Shrub" meant?

 Yeah, I heard that.
 He said he didn't know "all those local people," the lying bastard.

 Damn, Bartcop, you may be right, Rush is either lying, or in the final stages of syphilis.
 Since Rush has never heard of  Molly Ivins I guess I'll sign off with
 "if Rush gets any dumber, you'd have to start watering him".


 He's lying for sure, the syphilis is only a probably.
 Compared to his fat ass, they're all "little people."


 More Mail

 From: JennyQ1@aol.com

 Subject: Smirk

 I was wondering if anybody noticed how many times Smirk screamed
 "ummie finish" last nite.

 CNN reported it was 17, compared to McCain saying it once.

 Yep, he said it again and again.
 (See comprehensive list, above)
 If he'd answer the damn question asked,
 the others wouldn't have to keep saying, "So, is it yes or no?"

Before you read the next story, I'd like to ask a question:
Are there any McCain backers reading this?

I'd like to print some letters from Republicans for McCain and get
your reaction to Rush attacking John McCain day after day after day.

I know you GOPers think it's funny when Pigboy attacks Clinton,
or Jocelyn Elders or Jesse Jackson or Barney Frank or Ron Brown,
but how does it feel when he attacks someone on your side?

How does it feel to have your hero, ...your God, (don't deny it)
use his considerable skills to attack McCain with the most unfair,
frivolous, petty and mean-spirited, unfounded, horseshit charges?

I can't imagine what that's like - to live and breathe Pigboy's Nazi hate,
then turn around and be burned by it when he attacks a war hero.

I'd sure like to hear from you...

Pigboy Trashes McCain, Veterans

Did you hear the Nasty Pigboy in the second hour today?
He was comparing the "P.O.W." comments from last night's debate.

Years ago, a former P.O.W. whose name I believe to be Thomas Burch
attacked President Butch for abandoning Vietnam veterans.  A few weeks ago,
Smirk paid for a campaign rally and stood on the stage with this same man who
said his father abondoned the vets so he could trash McCain with the same charge.
At this rally, Smirk stood with Burch while Burch charged that John McCain had
turned his back on his fellow veterans.

Last night, McCain called Smirk on that, and Smirk shot back,
"Well, your New Hampster manager, Warren Rudman said the Coathanger
 Coalition were a bunch of bigots. Are you going to stand by him?"

McCain's response was pitiful.
McCain can handle himself in a North Vietnamese prison,
but he doesn't think very fast on his feet in a televised debate.

He said, "Rudman is entitled to his opinion," which gave Smirk the opening to say,
"Well, Burch has his opinions, too."

Of course, the Nasty Pigboy's job is to pee on John McCain, so he was all over
the subject Wednesday with his typical "fairness."  Pigboy agreed with Smirk
that if Rudman can call the CC, "bigots," then it's OK for Smirk to stand there
while Burch attacks McCain personally for abondoning his veterans.

I'm not going to pretend I know what it's like to have been tortured for over five years
and then be called "traitor" by another former P.O.W., but McCain was being
personally attacked over an issue that's as deeply personal as an issue can get.

There's no way you can compare, "YOU turned YOUR back on YOUR fellow veterans"
to calling the Coathanger Coalition "a bunch of bigots," which, of course, they are.

The Nasty Pigboy doesn't mind attacking a war hero or the American veterans,
as long as he can see Smirk's tax-cut-for-the-rich coming, you can't put it past
Pigboy to pee on Reagan, God, his parents or even the American flag.

I don't mind the Disgusting Pigboy being biased, but he ought to go easy
when joining Smirk in attacking McCain's loyalty to his fellow P.O.W.s.

That's a goddamn serious charge that Pigboy makes so lightly,
because he needs that tax cut - he needs it soooooo much.

I have no doubt Pigboy would commit oral sodomy on the corner of
Fifth and Broadway in New York City at high fucking noon if there was
a chance he might see a tax cut somewhere down the road.

Is John McCain a Reformer?
From the USA Today

Pulled Pork:
McCain showed once again why he is not beloved by some Senate colleagues.
The Arizona Republican, in citing four examples of pork-barrel spending, included
two pet projects of Trent Lott (R-Whites Only)

"They are a couple of million bucks on manure handling and disposing in
Starkville, Massabamma and a whopping $245 MILLION for a helicopter
carrier that the Navy neither needs nor wants."  -- John McCain


I ask again - whose money is that?


 From:  wtong@earthlink.net

 Subject:  Boot Newt site address change

 I have made a URL address change for The Boot Newt Sing Along Page.


 Bill Tong
 The Boot Newt Sing Along Page

Doc Harpy

I wonder if that evil, money-driven bitch reads  bartcop.com?

Yesterday, she was harp. harp, harping on the American Library Association.
But she was harping with a tone that seemed peculiar.

She would say, "I guess the people at the American Library Association,"

"would have no objection to that,  because at the American Library Association,

"they don't object to anything."

Now, I realize I didn't invent the cough, but the pause and the cough after each mention
of the ALA might seem a little familiar to regular  bartcop.com  readers.

Hey, Dr. Laura, if you're reading this...
You're a slut and a whore, you know that?
You've got the integrity of a goddamn woodchuck.
Your insatiable greed is surpassed only by that of the Nasty Pigboy,
and your claim that you don't remember posing for those gyno pics
is indicative of your honesty, you dishonorable scumbaggette.
What happened to taking responsibility, you old hag?
You take responsibility like Smirk does.


Everything I've ever said about Dr Laura is true.
Slut, whore, tramp for rent.
Call Dial-a-Whore at 1-800-DRLAURA.

By the way, Laura, what does Richard Mellon Scaife taste like?

Very Confusing Quotes (below) has an Update

 More Debate Obs

 From:  dproberts75@hotmail.com

 Subject: Alan Keyes on Racial Profiling

 Alan Keyes must have a bumper sticker that says "I'm Black! Pull me Over!"

 Did you hear Keyes support racial profiling at the SC debate? And when eight-wives
 asked him if he would be upset if he was pulled over by the police just because he was black,
 he said yes...but that he would be upset at OTHER BLACKS.

 My God, I mean, I just thought it was a RUMOR that when you joined the GOP,
 you had to get a piece of your brain removed, but some of those urban legends must be true.

 So if Keyes was driving home from the debate, and a South Carolina state trooper stopped him,
 asked him to get out of his car, searched his car, searched him (hell, cavity searched him),
 interrogated him, and basically treated him like a criminal, and then finally sent him on his way,
 ...then when Keyes got back into his car, the first thing out of his mouth would be
 "those goddamn Negroes"?

 How can this guy EVER claim racism again?

 Dread Pirate

Will Larry King Go To Heaven?

Click Here

Mail Bag Debate Obs

From:   jjsocrates@usa.com

Subject:  Dubya has already lost!


I guess its still too close to call who will win in South Carolina on Saturday,
but I think that its pretty clear that its ALREADY all over for Bush.
Even IF he manages to win in South Carolina, it will be by a VERY SLIM margin.
And if George W. Bush can barely win in the state that still flies the Confederate Flag,
then how can he expect to win in the more moderate big states like New York,
California, Michigan and Pennsylvania??

Also, I caught something from the debate last night that amused me.
George Bush kept harping on the fact that he was from Texas, and that Texas
was the second biggest state in the Union, and delivered a lot of electoral votes,
and that it is essential to win Texas to win the Presidency.  Which ignores
a critical fact:  Clinton and Gore wrote Texas off, because ANY Republican
is guaranteed to win Texas.  There is no was Gore could beat Bush OR McCain
in Texas.  Koresh, Alan Keyes could actually beat Gore in Texas.

Now, if Dubya was governor of, say, California or New York, THEN he'd have a case.
But the Republicans could put a hat on an armadillo and run it as their candidate and it
would STILL win Texas.  Apparently, the armadillo was unavailable, so they got George W.

Jeff Williams

Jeff, good point.

Texas, like Oklahoma, would vote for David Duke over any Democrat,
which makes it pointless to have a Texan as a candidate.

I wish there was a way for Smirk to win, but I agree with you.


More Debate Obs

I thought it was stupid and distracting to have Keyes in the debate.
Keyes felt it was his job to babysit the other two, which was stupid.
Every time Smirk or McCain went at it, Keyes would say,
"Is this what we want to beam to 200 countries?"

I think it is.
I want to see the two get face-to-face.
Sure, it's fun to see two Republicans screw with each other,
but I want to know my president can GET in someone's face.

There may come a time when our president may have to warn
North Korea or China or Iraq that, if they take Step "A,"
then, ...by Koresh, ...we're going to take Step "B," and in the case,
of the American military, Step "B" can be a real mother-effer.

And if that happens, I'd be comfortable with Gore and, to a
lesser degree, McCain, but Smirk wouldn't scare me at all.

People say Gore is wooden, sure, but he can also be cold.
Do you remember his debate with Quayle?

Quayle said something like,
"If Clinton-Gore win, they're going to limit the jobs in America."

Gore stared a hole thru the Indiana Spud and said, coldly,
"We're fixin' to limit two jobs..."  meaning Butch and Quayle.
Gore can be Michael Corleone when he wants to be.

One last thing about Keyes - he was right on the abortion issue.
If you're going to claim to be pro-life, you should agree with Keyes.

McCain is pro-life on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays,
and Smirk believes in RILOM, (rape, incest, life of mother)
but he supports a platform that's NOT what he believes.

So, of the three, Keyes is on incorrect but logical footing,
McCain is inconsistent and Smirk is just a silly goose.

Very Confusing Quotes

Bill Schneider, who I think almost always has it exactly right,
was on CNN last night critiquing the debate performances.
He said the best line of the night was when Smirk said,
"Not many parents are naming their kids 'Bill Clinton.'"

I've heard Schneider say that three times now.
Any clue what that means?

Is he saying from 1980-88, people named their kids "Ronald Reagan?"
Is he saying from 1988-92. people named their kids "Butch the Traitor?"

As much as I like Clinton, I'd never name my kid, "Bill Clinton,"
I might name him Billy BartCop, but not Bill Clinton,
so I wonder what Schneider really meant to say?

Any ideas?



From:  sniper@cei.net

Subject: Confusing Quote

In Little Rock phone book, there are:

54 "Bush's," but no Georges.
14 "Reagan's," but no Ronald.
19 "Clinton's," and one of them is William.

Maybe they are naming their kids "Bill Schneider" instead.
Sonny Scott

ha ha

Larry Klayman Files ANOTHER Lawsuit Against the White House

Click Here for the sorry details.

Paula Jones Wants Another "Taste"

Click Here

She can't get enough.

February 15, 2000

The Carolina Debate

This was my favorite part.

Click Here

"We ought to make the pie higher?"

 Smirk is going to make the pie higher?

 I guess we've had enough of that low, Clinton pie.
 I, for one, am fed up with low pie.

 Damn that Clinton and his low-pie policies.

 ...and you know Al Gore.
He'll go riiiiiiiiiiiight on with those same low-pie policies.

Bill Bradley wants to know:
Has Al Gore always been low-pie?
Was Al Gore low-pie in 1984?
When did his position change?
He owes us an explanation of that journey...

Saturday, do the right thing for your country,

Vote for High Pie!

Vote for Smirk!

John Rocker

They Still Don't Understand

Click Here

The Word for Today

Looks like the GOP's word for today is "vetted."

The faxes have gone out to all the sheep on the GOP payroll.
G. Gordon Liddy, the Pigboy, Paul Harvey, Doc Spread 'Em - all of them.

Every Republican with access to a microphone is saying we should
elect Smirk because he's been "vetted," meaning all the dirt that exists
has already been mentioned and discredited, so he's clean.

ha ha

This couldn't be better if I was writing the script my own damn self.
Somebody write today's date down - 2/15/00.

When Smirk gets his big-ass surprise,
I'll recall today, 2/15/2000 and re-print this.

Great Political Quotes

BUSH HAS, in the words of my old friend James Carville, ďa dog food problem.Ē

Thereís an old story that a new brand of dog food was coming on the market.
The corporation had hired the finest canine cooks, the best doggie recipe experts,
the most talented graphic designers for the label, and developed the most sophisticated
marketing strategy in dog food history. Then they launched their product.

There was only one problem: dogs wouldnít eat it.

By the same token, Republicans loved the concept of George W. Bush.
Moderate enough to win the votes of women and Hispanics, conservative enough
to win praise from Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson. Twice elected governor of the
second-biggest state, he projected his fatherís decency and Ronald Reaganís optimism.

There was only one problem: voters didnít like him.

  -- Paul Begala, one of the greats

Mail Bag

From:  pocus@webtv.net

Subject:   Dumbya on Meat the Press

BC, did ya see Shrub on Russert's show?  When asked about Illinois
halting the death penalty because of DNA overturning convictions, Dubya
says he won't because he KNOWS all his dead were guilty but Illinois
must have some problems with their legal system.

I get mail from ditto-monkeys saying I should cut Smirk some slack
because he's just a figurehead with no power to stop executions,
and then Smirk gets on TV and says he "personally" reviews each case.

Can you see Smirk reading trial transcripts, checking for errors?

Also when  questioned about the low ranking of Texas on pollution,
I swear I hear this peabrain blame it on weather patterns.. The more this
shit for brains opens his mouth, he makes Quayle look like Steven Hawking...

I agree.
They dumped Quayle because of "the buffoon thing," but he has experience!
Smirk's been cutting ribbons and polluting Texas in nothing but good times.
We've seen nothing of his leadership besides his inept campaign.

What if he runs his presidency the way he runs his campaign?
Spending $50,000,000 to lose a landslide?


What about a Smirk-Spud ticket?

Mail Bag

From:  (withheld)

Hey BC-I'm just sitting here at work laughing my ass off listening to Rush's
verbal flatulence about Democrats voting in Republican primaries.
I tried to get through on his line to ask him one thing:
Why so upset about it now?

Republicans in the South have been quoted as saying they set their
primaries up to allow Democrats to vote for Ronald Reagan in 1980.

Why are you crying about Democrats doing what Republicans wanted them to do?
Why aren't you down on the Republican leadership for setting up their system to
allow Democrats to register in the first place? Why aren't you screaming for them
to change back to the way they did it before 1980?

I know - that's more than one question, but I couldn't get through to ask anyway.
Rush hates it when Democrats take some Republican idea and screws them with it.

To tell the truth, I love it.


GOP Must Open All Polling Locations in South Carolina
New York Times, February 15, 2000

COLUMBIA, S.C., Feb. 14 -- A legal challenge that sought to block
Saturday's Republican presidential primary in South Carolina was
dropped today after the state Republican Party agreed to open every
available polling place in the state, including those in heavily
Democratic and black areas that were closed in previous years.

ha ha

In order to win a federal court's approval to hold the primary, the state party
has spent the last few weeks scrambling to assemble more than 5,000 volunteers
to staff the polling places, far more than in any previous primary. The party also agreed to
pay state election workers to work at polling places where volunteers can not be found.

As a result, more than 1,500 polling places will be open, twice the number in 1996.
The increased statewide access in non-Republican areas could make voting easier
for Democrats and independents to support Senator John McCain.

My name is Peter McWilliams.

I am 50 years old. I am a writer, publisher, and photographer.
I am an AIDS and cancer patient.

I am facing a mandatory-minimum 10-year sentence in federal prison (possibly life)
and, oh yes, a $4 million fine.

My crime?
Treating my illnesses with medical marijuana.

Care to read more?

Oh, Yeah?

From: latzmark@erols.com

Subject:  some thoughts ...

Yo BartCop,
Clinton lied, no questions there, right?

You start a conversation with that?
I'm going to say, "no."
A pack of wild, partisan dogs tried to make that claim,
but Clinton was acquitted by the slightly-more sane Senate.

So he's going to be dis-barred, as any other lawyer would.

ha ha
You think you've finally got him this time?
Bill Clinton?

ha ha

It is so frustrating that we have no way to bet on things like that.
Mrs. BartCop would have two Jaguars if I'd been able to place bets
the last two years with those who regularly predict his impending doom.

Politics aside, the guys a weasel, you know it, I know it,
and the American people are asleep; par for the course.

Politics aside?
Gee, I don't know.
Clinton the politician is the only guy we know.
he's the best either of us have ever seen.
I have no doubt he could win another national election.
Smirk, McCain and Gore are all trying to be Clinton this year.

Now, about this whole flag thing in SC, I have a question: Why is it that a couple
of other Southern states, with Democrats holding the Statehouse's, don't have a
problem with the "Battle Flag", while the only Rebublican Statehouse, SC, is being
boycotted and vilified? This isn't about what the flag may represent to a given part of
the population; it's about how many points the Democrats can score with the Black vote.
It burns my ass that the media, non-partisans that they are, won't point up this fact.

The Democrats are pounding them because we can.
The GOP LOVES to kick the blacks around.
The GOP is having FUN baiting the blacks with that flag.
That flag is such a sure loser for the GOP, and they don't care.
Smirk and McCain know they have to have the KKK vote to win Carolina,
so we're pointing that out.  You think that's dirty pool?

Did you hear Pat Robertson on Face the Whore Sunday?
He said Smirk went to Bob Jones University "because he needs those people to win."
Bob Jones called his daddy "a devil," and Smirk STILL went there to whore for votes.
Gore will win this election without the KKK vote.

Democrats are fond of labeling Republicans as rascist elitists,
but the Demoncrats use the race and class envy cards ad-nauseum.

Let me ask you a question:
If the GOP was lynching a black man every night,
and the Democrats called on them to stop,
would you accuse the Democrats of playing the race card for political gain?

As to Clintons claim, and yours, that he is responsible for the economy doing so well;
The economy is going great-guns because of the American workforce.
Bradley said earlier this week, among other non-Democratic party lines,
"The dynamacism of American workers is what has fueled this economy, not government."
 That's one of your own saying that.

Mark, if you choose to believe that Elmer Fudd created this great economy,
I won't try to stop you.
Others may giggle, but you have a right to your beliefs.

Please - if the American workforce is responsible,  why did the American workforce
refuse to perform for Presidents Reagan and Butch?
I've asked that question one hundred times - can't get a straight answer.

And no, Bradley isn't "one of mine."
He's a lonely man running against the greatest economy in history.
He's got to say something.

Of course, having said that, Bradley is now an outsider within the party.

You have that totally correct.
When this is over, Bradley will open a country music club in Branson, Missouri.

I guess it doesn't matter if he's right, only that he is going against the allmighty Demo-party.
Government for the people is long gone; now it's government for the party.
The Party is all-important; smacks a little of communism, don't you think?
Get back at me BartCop,
Mark Latsko

Mark, one party spent the last two years trying to pass meaningful legislation.
The other party spent 24 months and 50 million dollars grabbing for Clinton's cock,
a move that the American people said again and again and again they didn't like,
and you want to pretend it was the Democrats who put party over country?

I'd say it smacks of severe fascism.

Crazy Press Quotes

"McCain may win New Hampshire . . . but he's basically toast."
      --John Podhoretz, New York Post, Jan. 25.

"John McCain will be the Republican nominee for president."
     -- John Podhoretz, New York Post, Feb. 10.

The Queen of Hate

The lil' She-Nazi has gotten more bad press.
Will the witch get her new hate show on television?

Only if Paramount is run by money-grubbing whores.

Click Here

Mail Bag

From:  gaverr@mail.cvn.net

Subject: 60 Minutes

I watched the 60 Minutes piece on the Bush book and not a
word about Dubya, just an attack on the author.
If he's got proof why doesn't he trot it out?
I'd love to hear it myself.


I agree.
If the guy's nuts, then fine, but it seems that 60 Minutes's job
was to see if anything was there, not just attack the author.

Jesus Christ, the wild shit that's been written about Clinton these last seven years,
the Jerry Falwell pack of lies, the $10,000,00 PER MONTH Clinton was
supposed to have made from Mena airport, the idiotic Body Count,
the black baby with the crack-whore etc etc and where was 60 Minutes?

I admit I haven't seen every 60 Minutes they've ever done,
but when did they once investigate an anti-Clinton book?

Maybe they're afraid of appearing too pro-Clinton, since he was
on their show once in 1992 after the Super Bowl, but it seems like they
should investigate all the fraudulent accusations or none of them.

Or, maybe they're like me,
just salivating at the thought of a Smirk presidency?

Them Wacky Germans

This was sent to me as a legitimate picture of a float in a German parade.
Thanks to Kenneth Starr and his screwy erection problems and lack of discretion,
for painting a picture of Bill Clinton for the world to see.

Under Pressure

Today, for the first time in his life, Gov. Smirk's best friend is a negro.

If it wasn't for Alan Keyes, Smirk would have to take on McCain mano-a-mano.
With Keyes on the stage, Smirk has double the time to think of an answer.

Smirk knows that Keyes is going to ramble on and on about things like
abortion and the horrors of dealing with a giant like China,
so instead of being in the frying pan 50 percent of the time,
he's only in the hot seat 33 percent of the time,
which gives him a seventeen percent place in which to hide.

I wouldn't be surprised if the Bush people were smuggling money to the Keyes
campaign to keep him actively in this race - anything to avoid a fair fight.

Smirk's never been in a fight (with a man) before, and remember...
the Smirk campaign has promised to give McCain a spanking on television.
Get ready, this might be a hell of a show tonight on CNN.

How will Smirk handle the pressure?

© Wizard_Of_Whimsy

Letter to the Editor

Bush Should Worry about Republican Voters

As a Democrat, I find it somewhat amusing to hear George W. Bush
worrying  about Democrats in South Carolina crossing party lines
to vote for McCain because McCain is the weaker candidate.

Bush is beginning to sound a little paranoid to me.
Next, Bush will try blaming Republicans who are crossing party lines
to vote for Bradley and not vote for him, or accuse Democrats of
supporting Pat Buchannan to undermine the Republican race.

Maybe we Democrats are using reverse psychology.

By saying good things about McCain we're trying to scare Republican voters
into voting for Bush because Bush is the weaker candidate?
Bush is kind of spooky, has that smirk, and doesn't seem real bright.
Bush would be the easy one to beat.

Democrats don't think like Republicans.
We have our race between Gore and Bradley and that's what we're interested in.
If I were Bush I'd be focusing on getting those Republican votes in my own party.
Bush might want to be nicer to us Democrats because in the general election
he's going to want our vote. If he's going to win, he's going to have to win over
Clinton supporters, and that will not be easy no matter who the Republican's
choose for their candidate.

Marc Perkel
E-Mail Perkel

Do You Know the Name, Carl Albert?

If you were keeping up with politics 28 years ago, you know that name.
Carl Albert was a politician - from Oklahoma.

He was born in Bug Tussle, Oklahoma.
You remember Bug Tussle?
That's where Granny from the Beverly Hillbillies was born.

Carl Albert was a politician before entertainers were paid millions per year
to poison one group of Americans against another, the way the Greedy Pigboy,
Dr. Laura Harpy and Paul Harvey do every day.

Carl Albert was not religiously-insane.
He came before the embarrassing frauds who now represent only the
McVeigh wing of the Republican party in this dry, dusty Bedrock.

Let me give you some history A La BartCop.

Carl Albert was Speaker of the House in 1972
(Did you know the office of Speaker of the House
 was once held by a man of credibility? That's a historical fact.)

In 1972, Albert heard rumors of possible presidential crimes.
He quietly asked the House banking committee to see if Liddy's
burglars were paid for with GOP-raised money laundered in Mexico.
They were.

Meanwhile, Nixon's VP Spiro Agnew was in deep trouble.
The ignorant son-of-a-bitch took a $10,000 bribe, got caught,
and was forced to resign the vice-presidency in disgrace,
leaving Carl Albert next-in-line for the presidency of the Unites States.

As always, it gets worse for the Republicans.

Watergate was boiling.
Nixon was steaming down the tracks of impeachment.

Carl Albert had the legal claim to the big chair.
He was third in line when Number Two resigned for being a guilty prick,
and Number One was told by his party's senators he was going down.

All the Democrats had to do was use their majority in Congress
to block the appointment of the new vice president,
and President Carl Albert would've succeeded the Lying Dick.

An aide jokingly called him "President Albert," and he said,
"We will have none of that. I'm going to advise Mr. Nixon to
 nominate a vice president, and if he's qualified, we will confirm him."

President Nixon nominated Rep. Gerald Ford of Michigan,
a well-liked nobody without a lot of enemies.
In his confirmation hearings, the Senators asked him about a pardon.
Rep. Ford's exact words?

"I don't think the country would stand for it."

Well, when President Ford pardoned, "all the crimes Richard Nixon committed
or may have committed,"  we didn't have much of a choice, now did we?


Carl Albert was a giant of a man.
His funeral was last week in Muskogee, so I'm betting he held
the seat now being held by Tom Coburn, the lesser of the Jesus Twins.

I just want you to know he had the presidency in his hands, but said,
"No. let's do this the fair and proper way."

Twenty five years later, the Republican Speaker had a chance to return that favor.
The Republican party had a chance to do what the voters wanted.
They had a chance to do things "the fair and proper way."

Instead, they tried every partisan trick in the book to reverse the election results
in a horribly-ugly, against-the-will-of-the-people, religiously-insane rape of lust
that was fueled by partisan hatred and insatiable, blood-thirsty greed.

Of course, Rush Limba is to blame.

As King of the GOP hate machine, he shoulders the most responsibility.
Politics has changed - mostly on the side of the Republicans.
There was a time, in our lifetime, when the two sides would get together
after work and share a drink and hammer out a compromise.

That was before Rush Limba.
Both sides hate each other.

Rush says, "Compromise is weakness," and people buy that.
...and Oklahoma is the very worst.

I'm disgusted by the character of the race-baiting, white-power losers
Oklahoma sends to Washington to represent us these days.

We have ignorant, football-playing puppets representing us
and we have bad-faith, paid-for whores representing us.
It makes me sick.

Oklahoma once had a giant named Carl Albert in Washington.
Now - we have small men.

Carl Albert - a shot of Chinaco to you.

Mail Bag

From: rkruz@pough.net

The press seems to be giving Gov Smirk a free ride to the White House.
Why don't we hear about Smirk's brother who pilfered the savings and loan?

You mean Kneel Butch?
You mean Kneel Butch, the Butcher of Silverado?
You mean Kneel Butch who got away with a BILLION dollars in S&L money?
You mean Kneel Butch who paid a $50,000 fine for "losing" a BILLION dollars?

You must not be familiar with the American press.

Kneel's stolen BILLION didn't involve Clinton's cock.
Even tho Kneel lost two-hundred times what Jim McDougal lost,
without Clinton's cock - there is no story.

Grow up.

Oh! Mr. Greenfield!!!

"For seven years President Clinton and the Republicans have enacted a
political version of the great Wiley Coyote/Road Runner cartoons.

Year after year, the Republicans purchase a new acme machine,
the Acme Travelgate Scandal machine, the Acme Impeachment machine,
and they are certain that this time they've got him.

And when the dust clears, the Road Runner, Bill Clinton, is speeding along,
and Wiley Coyote, whether it's Newt Gingrich or Bob Livingston, or Bob Dole,
is headed right off that cliff."

  --CNN's Jeff Greenfield on Larry King, after the State of the Union

Let's Disbar Larry Klayman
Because Nobody Deserves it More

Salon Magazine, February 14, 2000

Speaking of media free rides,
the Insect Currently Known as Klayman is in the news again.

This time, he was trying to get some free publicity at a James Carville
book-signing. Mr. Carville was autographing copies of his fine tome Stickin'
(I have a copy, and it's a wonderful book, by the way), when Klayman
and his entourage showed up with yet another nuisance suit to serve on yet
another Clinton friend.

The Ragin' Cajun can defend himself quite well, being himself a lawyer,
but I worry about the dozens of little people whose lives Klayman has
made utterly miserable through his harrassment. Can't we at least try
to stop this vile man who would (quite literally!) sue his own mother?

Yes, we can!

..and by taking a tactic that Larry's own Freeper buddies use and
turning it against him: disbarment petitions.

Those wishing to disbar Larry Klayman should send letters and/or faxes
and phone calls to the Washington, D.C., Office of Professional
Responsibility. Larry has been a member of the D.C. Bar since 1977
when he worked for the Department of Justice.

Normally, petitions from persons writing from out-of-state would be ignored
by a typical state OPR. But, since Mr. Klayman is a member of the D.C.
Bar, he is fair game to petitioners from all fifty states.

Here's the information you need to get started:

District of Columbia
Leonard H. Becker
District Columbia Board on Professional Responsibility
515 5th Street, NW, Building A, Rm. 127
Washington, D.C. 20001
Phone: (202) 638-1501
Fax: (202) 638-0862

Filing Method: Call for form or submit a detailed letter
Anonymity: No anonymous petitions allowed
Got it? Good.

A Push Poll By Any Other Name. . .
Jim Yardley of the New York Times, February 13, 2000


February 14, 2000

Sorry the store is opening late today.
I'm at the dentist getting my teeth put back in.

You see, I watched the Homicide movie last night...


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