Maybe your readers will enjoy this annotated version of GWB's repellent proclamation of today.

                      Mark Crispin Miller

                      Note: MCM's comments in bold blue

                     Patriot Day, 2002
               By the President of the United States of America
               A Proclamation

                     Click  Here

                      On this first observance of Patriot Day, we remember and honor those who
                      perished in the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001. We will not
                      forget the events of that terrible morning nor will we forget how
                      Americans responded in New York City, at the Pentagon, and in the skies
                      over Pennsylvania -- with heroism and selflessness; with compassion and
                      courage; and with prayer and hope [:-)]. We will always remember our
                      collective obligation to ensure that justice is done, that freedom
                      prevails, and that [maybe one or two of] the principles upon which our
                      Nation was founded endure.

                      Inspired by the heroic sacrifices of our firefighters, rescue and law
                      enforcement personnel [who incurred health risks that will henceforth not
                      be monitored, because it's too expensive], military service members
                     [who hustled me out of harm's way], and other citizens, our Nation found
                      unity [in admiration of myself], focus [on my greatness and agenda], and
                      strength. We found healing in the national outpouring of compassion for
                      those lost, as tens of millions of Americans participated in moments of
                      silence, candlelight vigils, and religious services [:-)]. From the
                      tragedy of September 11 emerged a stronger Nation, renewed by a spirit
                      of national pride and a true love of country [and not too goddamn likely
                      to find out why 9/11 happened in the first place]

                      We are a people dedicated to the triumph of ["]freedom and democracy["]
                      over evil and tyranny [with which, on the other hand, we often partner up,
                      although you sure as hell will not find out about it]. The heroic stories
                      of the first responders who gave their all to save others strengthened
                      our resolve [to bomb the hell out of Afghanistan, and so disperse al Qaeda
                      all throughout the world]. And our Armed Forces have pursued the war
                      against terrorism in Afghanistan and elsewhere with valor and skill [if no
                      results to speak of]. Together with our coalition partners, they have achieved
                      success [not!].

                      Americans also have fought back against terror by choosing to overcome
                      evil with good [although I couldn't really tell you what that means].
                      By loving their neighbors as they would like to be loved, countless
                      citizens have answered the call to help others. They have contributed to relief
                      efforts, improved homeland security in their communities, and volunteered
                      their time to aid those in need. [All in all, a nifty program, since it
                      distracts them from the issues of my own foreknowledge of the terrorist
                      attacks, my own history of sleazy business deals, my own VP's involvement
                      with Iraq, and so much more that you will never know about.] This spirit
                      of service continues to grow as thousands have joined the newly established USA
                      Freedom Corps, committing themselves to changing America one heart at a time
                      through the momentum of millions of acts of decency and kindness. [Whatever.]

                      Those whom we lost last September 11 will forever hold a cherished place
                      in our hearts and in the history of our Nation. [And I'm _really_ trying not to laugh.]
                      As we mark the first anniversary of that tragic day, we remember their sacrifice;
                      and we commit ourselves to honoring their memory by pursuing peace and justice
                      in the world and security at home. [When we start doing that, we'll let you know.]
                      By a joint resolution approved December 18, 2001 (Public Law 107-89), the Congress
                      has authorized and requested the President to designate September 11 of each year as
                      "Patriot Day."

                      NOW, THEREFORE, I, GEORGE W. BUSH, President of the United States of
                      America, do hereby proclaim September 11, 2002, as Patriot Day. I call
                      upon the people of the United States to observe this day with appropriate
                      ceremonies and activities, including remembrance services and candlelight
                      vigils [and with some detailed notes on all suspicious types, especially
                      Democrats]. I also call upon the Governors of the United States and the
                      Commonwealth of Puerto Rico, as well as appropriate officials of all
                      units of government, to direct that the flag be flown at half-staff on
                      Patriot Day. Further, I encourage all Americans to display the flag at
                      half-staff from their homes on that day and to observe a moment of silence
                      beginning at 8:46 a.m. eastern daylight time, or another appropriate
                      commemorative time, to honor the innocent victims who lost their lives
                      as a result of the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001 [:-)].

                      IN WITNESS WHEREOF, I have hereunto set my hand this fourth day of
                      September, in the year of [my close friend] our Lord two thousand two,
                      and of the Independence of the United States of America the two hundred and
                      twenty-seventh [and, coming soon, my friends, the New New World Order].

                      GEORGE W. BUSH

Note: Mark Crispin Miller is the author of "The Bush Dyslexicon"

     click to order

 Back to

Privacy Policy
. .