Tequila Taste Test

A couple of days ago, I got a hundred dollar bill in the mail and was ordered
to purchase and compare Sammy Hagar's Wabo Cabo reposado to Chinaco Anejo.
I purchased both, and set out to address the question scientifically Saturday evening.

Funny how this worked, tho.
I had an open bottle of Chinaco Anejo hanging around.
But I was specifically instructed to purchase a second bottle.

This would allow me to compare the open Chinaco with the new Chinaco and Sammy's Wabo Cabo.
It was beginning to look like a very interesting evening.

So I cut open Sammy's finest, nice cheery bottle, some might even call it sexy.
Then I cut open God's Sunshine - the Chinaco, and in my excitement, I pulled too hard
and the Chinaco knob came off in my hand and the cork stayed in the bottle.

I refused to panic.

I located a cork screw and extricated the cork from the new Chinaco bottle.
Remember how I was just saying that air will kill the flavor of Chinaco?
(Previous testimony can be corroberated in recent issues...)

Once I freed the Chinaco, I knew I had to find another cork.
With my IQ of 64, I determined that a cork from a previous bottle might fit best.
So I went to the Chinaco Shrine in the Chinaco Gazebo and there it was...
A recently-emptied bottle of Chinaco - and look here - there's a quarter teaspoon left in it.

That meant Sammy's Cabo Wabo is up against not two, but three Chinaco Anejos.
The night was getting interestinger and more interestinger.

About this time, I started doing the chat thing...

There is another chatroom that anyone can get in on MIRC at
And once you get there you punch in  #bartcop  and then you're there.
There's so much I don't understand, but I was proud I could DL the software
(from www.mirc.com) and get the damn thing turned on.

Also, I picked up another stalker over the weekend.
They've started an anti-bartcop webring, I guess, because it's a really incestuous thing
where they all talk about today's  bartcop.com  and then they grab each other's asses and say,
"Bartcop is an uneducated blowhard with a small IQ," which is what I admit to every day.

You stalkers guys need to reconsider your goals in life.
I'm nobody. Why fixate on me?
Less than one percent of Americans have ever heard of  bartcop.com

When you fill out an loan application, and the guy says, "What's a bartcop stalker?"
don't you get tired of explaining who BartCop is?

Back to the tequila test...

So while I was chatting, I did my first sip of the just-purchased Chinaco.
The first thing I tasted was chocolate, then the fruit.  It was divinity on Earth.
I did another sip - to be sure - and yes, Chinaco had done it again.
I don't know how they can get so many different yet similar tasting products without sacrificing any quality.
Like a great steak, or a homemade pie, each bottle is a little different.

Next up, I got a sip of the old Chinaco, the bottle that donated the cork.
It was the famous Wildflowers Chinaco, and it was a real treat to taste an old friend again.
That's why I saved that last 10ccs, to play a little trick on myself.

Of all the Chinacoes*  I've tasted, the Wildflowers edition is surely the finest of the finest.

Third, I tried a sip of the already-opened bottle, and it was "just" nice and fruity.

So now it was time to put Sammy thru the paces.

Two and a half years ago, Sammy was the first expensive tequila I ever tried.
I did it live, online, and it opened the whole world of fine tequilas for me.
Since, at the time, I thought Cuervo was real tequila, I liked the Sammy enough
to try some other brands and I'm so Koresh-damn glad I did.

I guess that fella won't be sending me any more tequila money, because the Wabo tasted awful.
It has a heavy, burnt taste, with a hint of tree sap in it.
Maybe Sammy is using new barrels or something, because that sap taste is right there.

I gave it a few minutes, drank some bottled Culligan water, and tried the same process in reverse.
I started with the Wabo, and it was still too heavy, and that sour taste just screamed at me.

Reminder: Wabo Cabo cost more than God's Sunshine.

I sipped a little of the "just" nice and fruity Chinaco and it tasted like home.
Chased that with a shot of the new chocolate Chinaco, which is a really interesting taste.
I've loved Kahlua for decades, so alky chocolate was no new thing, but the chocolate fruit
really is an interesting experience, and it's great with a meal.

Then I killed the last of that best-of-all-times Wildflowers Chinaco as a tear ran down my cheek.
Maybe there will be another wildflowers batch someday. (sniff)

So, now I had 98 percent of a bottle of sour tequila on my hands,
so I treated it like cheap whiskey and started working on it with big shots.

Funny, just like in the summer of 1999, my forehead broke out in a sweat.
Sammy's Wabo is the only tequila - no, make that the only liquor - that has ever
made my brow break into a sweat, so no telling what that means.

So, Mr. Anonymous, thank you for the taste-testing treat,
and I wish I could say nicer things about your favorite tequila and,
out of respect for your taste, I pulled my punches just a little in my critique,
but thanks again for your donation. I think I'll take both bottles on the road
tomorrow to see Garbage and that Irish backing group.

I'll be chugghing the Wabo and sipping the Sunshine.

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