From: Mike Duncan

 Subject: Bartcop Radio demo

 I see you push this idea a lot... but I think you'd get more subscribers if you did a demo.
 Give them a taste of the tequila, y'know?
 How do they know you have the Voice?

 Webpage is one thing, email is one thing, chat is one thing, radio is something else.

 Mike, you either read my mind or the issue where I said I was taking off next week
 to have the tech boys come in and hook up the equipment so I can record a shipload
 of lil' samplers (they call them demos in radio?) to see if static strikes.

 I'm going to put all-knew material on MP3 or rm files (whatever they say works)
 and I'll either e-mail those files to subscribers or, if there's a God, I'll get a month-to-month
 deal with a streaming company and give the secret URL to subscribers and pillars.

 I also plan to send some (demos, you call them?) to the Joey Joe Joe Show (Joe is my good friend).
 Watch for that!

 The bad news?  Yes, I have a voice, but it sounds like early Bobcat Goldthwaith
 with a bad Cuervo Gold hangover impersonating a rat caught in a trap by his gonads.
 It's must-hear radio!  My big fear is how many subscribers will cancel after show #1

 I'll bet it'll sound like Mike Malloy minus the professionalism and 100 IQ points.
(Sidebar: Mike is lucky!  He has Kathy, who produces like Freddie DeCordova.)
 Prepare to be incredibly let down, then eventually'll get better.

 BTW, we're holding auditions for a sidekick in Boston, New York, Chicago, Miami,
 Dallas, Denver, Seattle, Los Angeles, but the winner will probably be from Vegas.


 I'm not Pink's biggest fan.
 Oh sure, that "Let's get the party started" song is a great party song,
 but I thought Pink was just another dumb Britney with a sex-record contract.
 (Have you hear how she got her name? Whatever you heard - it's worse than that)

 But she did this song on Dave last night (repeat) about being a 12-year old girl
 whose parents are at each other's throats every night, eventually climaxing with
 "Can't we go back to when we were happy, like in that photograph of all of us?"

 The song starts slow and builds, climaxing in her screaming with all the passion,
 "I don't want Momma to have to change her last name!"
 which struck chords with me even tho I had the ultimate Rockwell happy childhood.
 ...if you don't count the part about everyone dying.
 I thought it took balls for a new wave/punk/sk8ter/newbie-whatever to do a song about a little kid.
 I thought Pink was a brainless nothing - but I was wrong.

 Sometimes I like being wrong.

Catching Up...

 Last Friday on Dave, his supermodels were "on cape."
 Rankwise, they were the lowest rung on the celebrity scale, but these girls can act!

 Seriously, when Paul was f-ing dying from the injustice his Baby put on him,
 When he wasn't makin' too much money, you know where his paycheck went
  you know, he brought it home to Baby, and he never spent one red cent.

 ...and yet he continued to give her everything he had...

 I'm only flesh and blood, but I can be anything that you demand
 I could president of General Motors baby, ...or just a tiny little grain of sand

 So Dave's supermodels come out, and they're not smiling and waving, like usual.
 They only had one thing on their minds, and that was saving Paul Schaffer!

 They got the cape over him, and coaxed him into going backstage. Things were going well.
 They looked right in his face, telling him, "I know, but it'll be OK, Paul, just come with us."
 They almost got him to the edge of the stage, but, his Baby done him so wrong,
 Paul broke free and fell back to his knees, screaming, "I'm in the wilderness," (his lyrics, but cool)
 as the camera caught Dave's supermodels waxing what might've been had they'd been more effective.

 It was silliness, but it was done with class and style.
 A tribute to James, BS&T and the timeless blues about being in love with a bitch.

 ...a shot of Chinaco Anejo for Paul Schaffer

 From: Withheld

 I am re-reading William Shirer's "Rise and Fall of the Third Reich" after many years
 and I am at the point of the formation of the Gehimnis Stadts Polizei--secret state police
 from the SS, otherwise known by the name Ge-sta-po. I picked the book up because the
 parallels are too striking to ignore. Ashcroft = Himmler.

 I even got cable recently so I can see what all of this media stuff is about.
 I am at a loss for words when I see this thing called "FOX News".
 I thought Pravda was blatant!

 After they killed Wellstone they called Mondale a dinosaur.
 At least he was elected and served - Kissinger!!??!  Poindexter??!!?
 A wanted felon and a convicted felon!

 Keep up the fight,

 G in ME

 From: Rude Rich

 Bart, I'll listen to BartCop Radio, but only if you don't play what you call music.

 ha ha

 Yeah, Garbage songs between each comedy bit!

 You're going to start doing comedy?
 Did you hire some writers?

 Rude Rich

 ha ha

 Promise you'll be on my first show?

 On the first BartCop radio experiment, (Spring 2001?) Rude Rich was one of the first callers.
 The engineer has that first three-hour show in the can, but I've never heard it.

 More from: Rude Rich

 Subject: Top Songs Ever

 The local classic rock station ran the top 1043 songs of all-time this weekend (104.3 FM).
 Springsteen weighed in at number 5 with Born To Run. That crappy group of pretentious bores
 that you claim rule the earth came in at number 167 with Beautiful Day (one of their worst IMO).

 You're right - Jersey doesn't know good music.
 I wouldn't put BD in U2's top twenty.

 Sadly, Stairway came in first followed by Layla and Freebird which is ridiculous.
 Freebird wouldn't make it into my top 10,000 songs. See it for yourself  Click  Here

 As for Bruce connecting...when was the last time Bono got up and jammed with the
 house band at a local bar? Bruce still does it every weekend at the Stone Pony.

 ha ha

 How many free shows did Springsteen do in Sarajevo?
 Would Springsteen even be recognized outside of Jersey?
 (Don't write, I'm just f-ing with Rude Rich)

 I doubt Bono has ever heard "20 Flight Rock" let alone know the words backwards.
 I doubt he even knows the song. I doubt you do either. It didn't make the list.

 Isn't that from the first Britney CD?
 (Don't write - it's a joke!)

 I'm sure Bono considers himself way too important to play with some
 local band of nobodies but that's what makes a rocker and a pretentious jerk.

 While your boy was jamming with Locklear's husband, Bono was in Africa for weeks
 with Nazi Republicans trying to raise billions so fewer millions will die of AIDS.
 Meanwhile, Bruce is doing 20 Flight Rock backwards?
 ha ha
 If that's not proof Bono's a jerk, I don't know what is.

 Garbage didn't even make the list.

 Then I agree with you - the list sucks, but at least they got #1 right,
 and I'm not Bruce's biggest fan, but Born to Run is a helluva song.
 Clarence plays sax like I play ditto-monkey.

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