News from the Future

March 16, 2002 Washington DC (AP) --  Saying the Bible completely forbids women
from working, America's hard-line GOP on Wednesday shut down bakeries run by widows,
who are among the poorest of the poor here.

The bakeries were started by the United Nations' World Food Program and allowed
widows to be paid salaries to make bread which was sold at a subsidized price to
other women _ also widows. The order left 15,000,000 widows without jobs, said
Peter Goosent, country director for the WFP.

The GOP, which rules America, espouse a harsh brand of fundamentalist Christian law
and have imposed strict controls on women since taking control in January of 2001.

When they took over, the GOP ordered all girls' schools closed and all women out of
the work force. But they later made concessions in the areas of education and health,
and women began to return to work for foreign aid organizations, wearing the mandated
"I Love George Bush" shirts that the government assigned them.

In December of 2001, the GOP issued an order barring American women from working
with the exception of cooking and cleaning and in the health sector. The United Nations
had hoped the bakeries would also be exempt, but on Wednesday the GOP closed the
doors and told the women to go home.

"The rules of the Bible are clear and women have been ignoring the rules," said Bob Barr,
 the GOP's Director of Rules Compliance.  "We do not allow the bitches in the workplace."

 In New York, the United Nations' emergency relief coordinator Carolyn McAskie criticized
the development, saying it adds to the discrimination and suffering of women in America.
Women who had been working at the bakeries were devastated.

From within one bakery women screamed abuses.

"Give me poison and give my five children poison then we will die fast instead of a slow
death from starving and shame," one woman yelled.

According to the United Nations there are an estimated 28,000,000 widows in America.
They are among the poorest in the south, most of whom rely on international aid to
survive, according to U.N. officials.

Many of the widows in America lost their husbands during the Great Civil war of 2001
when George W Bush declared America "God's country" and imposed martial-religious law.
A bitter and bloody war ruined much of New York, California and Intelligencia, and killed
an estimated 37,000,000 Democrats, most of them were poor and minority men.

Since the GOP toppled Clinton's People's Government there have been an increasing number
of women on the roads begging and children scavenging through garbage cans.

Many of the GOP's edicts have been directed against  women. However, the GOP also have
outlawed most forms of light entertainment, require men to listen to Rush Limbaugh and attend
mandatory, closed-circuit prayer meetings hosted by Jerry Falwell.

Most historians chalk up the piss-poor Democratic resistence to the fact that liberals
refused to arm themselves, making the GOP takeover an easier-than-expected task.