Here are some nominees for the 52nd Annual Prime-Time Emmy Awards:

Comedy Series:
Everybody Loves Raymond, CBS;
Frasier, NBC;
Friends, NBC;
Sex and the City, HBO;
Will & Grace, NBC

Frasier is the smartest, funniest show on TV.
Friends is watchable, but the others are just crap.
Nothing is as bad as comedy that's not funny.

Drama Series:
ER, NBC;
Law & Order, NBC;
The Practice, ABC;
The Sopranos, HBO;
The West Wing, NBC

ER should have a DNR order out on it.
Law & Order is still a great show, and will be for a long time.
(They got an unprecedented order for five more years.)
The Practice was once a great show, maybe it'll come back.
West Wing was a damn close second - it's the best show on free TV.
But there's nothing like The Sopranos.
 

Television Movie:
Annie, ABC;
Introducing Dorothy Dandridge, HBO;
Oprah Winfrey Presents:
Tuesdays with Morrie, ABC;
RKO 281, HBO

Didn't see any of these, but Halle Berry is always fun unless she's behind the wheel of a car.
Halle's on my "to do" list, so we'll let her have it.
 

Actor, Comedy Series:
Michael J Fox, Spin City, ABC;
Kelsey Grammer, Frasier, NBC;
John Lithgow, 3rd Rock, NBC;
Eric McCormack, Will & Grace, NBC;
Ray Romano, Everybody Loves Raymond, CBS

Grammer should win, but they'll give it to the undeserving Fox.
I don't dislike Fox, he just wasn't as good.
I'm sure Kelsey would rather have his health than another Emmy.
 

Actor, Drama Series:
Dennis Franz, NYPD Blue, ABC;
James Gandolfini, The Sopranos, HBO;
Jerry Orbach, Law & Order, NBC;
Martin Sheen, The West Wing, NBC;
Sam Waterston, Law & Order, NBC

I am so tired of Dennis Franz winning this every year, like he's the only actor around.
I used to like him, but he's become Johnny One-note.
He's played this same exact character since the early 80's on Hill Street Blues.
Then he was Beverly Hills Buntz, then Andy Sipowicz - all the same guy.
Orbach is funny as hell and the best part of Law & Order besides Angie Harmon.
Martin Sheen does a great president, and Sam Waterston is a much better DA
than Michael Moriarty. If I was the defendent, I'd rather have Moriarty.
Waterston is driven.
But James Gandolfini - he's a real actor.
He can out-act the others with a glance.
All your great actors can do it without speaking.
 

Actress, Comedy Series:
Jenna Elfman, Dharma & Greg, ABC;
Patricia Heaton, Everybody Loves Raymond, CBS;
Jane Kaczmarek, Malcolm in the Middle, Fox;
Debra Messing, Will & Grace, NBC;
Sarah Jessica Parker, Sex and the City, HBO

None of these women impress me, but I'd like to have sex with Debra Messing.
You do know that most decisions men make are decided below the belt, right?
 

Actress, Drama Series:
Lorraine Bracco, The Sopranos, HBO;
Amy Brenneman, Judging Amy, CBS;
Edie Falco, The Sopranos, HBO;
Julianna Margulies, ER, NBC;
Sela Ward, Once and Again, ABC

Lorraine became a whiner this year on The Sopranos.
I sure liked her better when she was in control of herself.
Amy is OK, she can act, but I've never seen her show.
Julianna will probably win, unless Hollywood hates her now
for turning down the $27,000,000 to try to save ER.
Sela Ward, that's another whining women's show, right?
Edie Falco wins this one.
She's the real boss of Jersey's biggest crime boss.
 

Supporting Actor, Comedy Series:
Peter Boyle, Everybody Loves Raymond, CBS;
Brad Garrett, Everybody Loves Raymond, CBS;
Sean Hayes, Will & Grace, NBC;
Peter MacNicol, Ally McBeal, Fox;
David Hyde Pierce, Frasier, NBC

I like Peter McNichol, but he spent most of 1999 making noises
by blowing out through his nose. That's not acting.
Since there is no God, David Hyde Pierce could lose this.
He's by far the funniest sit-com character on television.
I remember decades ago, "Archie Bunker" wanted more money and went on strike.
They wrote around him for those few shows. Someone would say, "Where's Archie?"
and the answer would be, "he dropped a crate on his foot at work, he's at the doctor,"
and the audience would laugh knowing what a pain-in-the-ass Archie would be
to the doctor, who was probably black, ha ha. But Archie's character was so real
he could get a laugh without even being there. That's how good David Hyde Pierce is.
 

Supporting Actor, Drama Series:
Michael Badalucco, The Practice, ABC;
Dominic Chianese, The Sopranos, HBO;
Steve Harris, The Practice, ABC;
Richard Schiff, The West Wing, NBC;
John Spencer, The West Wing, NBC

This could be a five-way tie.
Dominic is the funniest, but that's not the catagory.
He's had great, great lines on The Sopranos.
There have been times on the show where, for example, he was in
great pain and he'd say, "cock," which isn't funny on the page
but Dominic Chianese can make that one-word line funnier than hell.

Michael Badalucco does great work, but he won last year.
Of all the characters on TV, he's the most "everyman."

The West Wing guys are totally believeable, Richard Schiff, especially.
His Toby character is really the star of West Wing, but we should give this
to Steve Harris, a great actor who's been overlooked because whitey
always has his foot on the black man's neck.
Just kidding, but Harris would win this if "fair" was a real word.
 

Supporting Actress, Comedy Series:
Jennifer Aniston, Friends, NBC;
Kim Cattrall, Sex and the City, HBO;
Lisa Kudrow, Friends, NBC;
Megan Mullally, Will & Grace, NBC;
Doris Roberts, Everybody Loves Raymond, CBS

This is another below-the-belt pick, but Aniston is funny.
I think Courtney Cox is sexier and a better actress, but she
married freakshow David Arquette and needs to be punished.
The others on this list must've slept with somebody to be nominated.
 

Supporting Actress, Drama Series:
Stockard Channing, The West Wing, NBC;
Tyne Daly, Judging Amy, CBS;
Allison Janney, The West Wing, NBC;
Nancy Marchand, The Sopranos, HBO;
Holland Taylor, The Practice, ABC

Holland Taylor won last year, which was historic because she plays
a sexually-active woman in her late 50's. That's new for Hollywood.
We know Tyne Daly can act, but she already has a wall of trophies.
(Remember Dirty Harry pulling her out of the way just before
 that Laws Rocket fired in one of the Dirty Harry movies?)
Allison Janney is good, but this one goes to Stockard Channing.
This is my favorite award, because I don't even like Stockard Channing.
When I heard she was joining the cast as Bartlett's wife, I said,
"Oh. no," but the first time she walked in the room on West Wing the
whole place just stopped and stared at her. You've heard that phrase,
"lights up a room," - that's Stockard Channing.
Maybe it's a tribute to Hillary, but I think she gets more respect from
the president's staff than he does. She won me over even tho I don't like her.
That must be good acting.
 

Surely, you don't agree with every pick.