Fear Itself

 I may have figured something out.   I can't be sure, but so far, it makes sense
 from every angle, so I'm sticking with it until a better theory comes along.

 Why do foam-at-the-mouth Republicans get such high ratings on radio and TV?

 Here's my answer:
 Democrats are generally happier than Republicans. We don't hear the "call to arms"
 every few seconds that the sky is falling and action must be taken right away!

 Repugs are extremely insecure and scared to death of making progress.
 They must be constantly re-assured .

 Here in K-Drag, Oklahoma, it works like this:
 From 6-9 AM, former liberal turned ditto-monkey whore John Erling reasures the DMs
 that hating Clinton is good for them. Then from 9-noon, Laura the Unloved reasures them
 that the goals of the gay movement is to rape and destroy your children.

 Then from noon-1 PM, Paul Harvey (R-Horse Molester) and the local nazi's explain that liberals are
 evil and must be destroyed. Then from 1-4, Rush reassures them that it's God's will that we ridicule
 Jocelyn Elders and Jesse Jackson because America is, after all, about rich, white Christian men.

 Then from 4-6, the most obnoxious bastard ever, (almost as bad as Mancow) Wes Minter,
 whines like that guy on the commercial who says, "Our servers - they stole all our servers,"
 until I  have to change to the Muzac Channel to keep from vomiting.

 Then from 6-9, Sean Hannity reassures them that Jesus Christ wants and needs a tax cut.
 I'm not sure who comes on at nine, either Matt Drudge or Neil Bortz, and then it all starts
 again with John Erling as you're rolling out of bed the next morning.  It's 24/7 hatred of liberals.
 That's what Mr. Scaife andf Mr. Murdoch are paying for, so that's what America gets.

 Meanwhile Fox News is telling constant lies while using the most inflammatory rhetoric possible,
 and being 24/7, the ditto-monkey sucker is never too far from his precious psychological blankie.
 The uneducated rednecks must be constantly reassured that God's on their side, while at the
 same time, the whores of the right scream, "Here comes Hillary" at the top of their lungs.

 The media people know they're lying, but it pays well, so they can't resist. It's what whores live for.
 Like organized religion, they create a false boogeyman, then sell the cure to the weak and the scared.
 The preachers guarantee your eternity in flames unless you give them money.
 They create the problem, then sell you a cure at Enron prices.

 They swear the liberals want to rape your kids and turn them gay, and the darkies are taking over
 and the beaners will soon out vote us and the UN has f-ing tanks lined up on the Mexican border
 and if you turn off Fox News you probably won't have a home to go to after work because Clinton
 is an evil genius who sold us out to the Chi-Coms.

 (Meanwhile, the B.F.E.E. is emptying the US Treasury, overthrowing democratically elected
  governments, selling weapons to terrorists and cornering the market on oil and gold, etc.etc
  but we need to watch our for Hillary and Bill - the REAL problems, right?)

 Meanwhile, the liberals are happy and going on with their lives.
 They don't get too excited about their political problems.
 They're confident that things are going to work out.

 And that's why right-wing verbal terrorists own the airwaves - because the scared morons need
 constant reassuring that we're still in the fifties, the blacks know their place, there's no such thing
 as homos and the liberals are all wrong about moving America forward.

 Flaw in the theory:

  None so far.

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