Vol 171 - The Snack Bar on the Beach

February 21, 2000

More Rush Lies

Monday, the Nasty Pigboy said,
"Why is the media so upset about Bush and Bob Jones University?
 They never get upset when top Democrats meet with Louis Farrakhan."

Have the top Democrats ever met with Farrakhan?

Or is this just another stupid, Pigboy lie,
trying to excuse Smirk's overt racism with, "Everybody does it?"

Fantastic Update from the Ryder Truck Ditto-Monkey (See Below)

From:   seliga@totcon.com

Subject:  unsolicited porn

1. I sent you an e-mail in defense of rush.
2. You took it upon yourself to send me unsolicited porn.
3. You also sent e-mail to my 14 yr old son.
4. I am sending this copy to our Fla.attorney general along with
    the garbage you send at will.



You are a wet dream come true, you know that?
I haven't had me a real squeealer in a long, long time.
Let's run thru your list of moronic complaints:

1. ha ha
   You started with a good one.
   You call that a defense of Rush?
   Here's what you wrote, pea brain,

Subject:    maggot
you are a sick degenerate maggot.how in the hell can your
mother[j.reno]raise a piece of manure like you.it should
have been a spent load.

   You are the very definiton of a ditto-monkey.
   You don't have the sense to pour piss out of a boot.
   That wasn't a defense of Rush.
   That was an Insanity Defense.

2. I sent you porn?
    Oh, God, I hope it was a picture of Laura Schlessinger with her legs spread.
    That'll make national headlines.
    "BartCop Tells Truth About Whore!"
    (No pictures were sent to this donkey. He considers the truth, "porn.")

3. I sent e-mail to your 14-year old son?
    ha ha
    You're a desperately stupid son-of-a-bitch, you know that?
    How did I get your son's e-mail address?
    Using my divine powers?

    Seriously, do you have Smirk for brains?
    Did you fall and hit your head on something hard?
    If you sent me some Monkey Mail on your kid's account,
    and I answered it, that makes YOU the fucking moron, now doesn't it?
    If you started a fight with your kid's e-mail account,
    you probably aren't fit to be a parent.

4. You gonna sue me?
    Or have me arrested?
    ha ha
    This MUST be a gag!
    Is that you, Artie?

    Who put you up to this?
    Did Sabutai tell you to threaten me with litigation?
    ha ha

    You gonna fly me to Florida?
    Or is the attorney general coming to Knuckledrag?
    Tell you what, Friday is my 4th anniversary at RL-LNW.
    If you could serve me/have me arrested that day, it would be perfect!

    By the way, tell the Florida attorney general I'm going to make him cry in court.
    I hope he's a big, nasty looking Republican, too.
    Those are the most fun to humble.

    Do they televise trials in Florida?
    If they do, I'll come there!
    Any laws against drinking fine tequila in court?

    If you get me into a courtroom, I'll prove you're an unfit parent
    and you won't have your kids anymore, stupid.

5. No, and eat me for asking.
    If you weren't such a spineless dick, we wouldn't be having this conversation.
    When we get to court, I'll explain to the jury how you introduced yourself.
    "Hi, I'm ditto-monkey and a spineless dick."

    My Exhibit "A" (for asshole) will be your admission YOU contacted ME.
    Yes, one of us is a "sick degenerate maggot."
    You thought you'd go a few rounds with the champ and you got hurt.
    Oh, poor you!

    You say I sent you porn?
    You failed to describe this alleged "porn."
     I don't think you know what the fuck you're talking about.
     I think you're a goddamn ditto-monkey with a degree from Whine University.
     I'll bet your 14-year old wishes he had different parents.
     Does he outwit you often?

     Get back to me on the televised trial and the tequila question.
     I'd hate to kick your ass sober, but I would.
     Next time your balls swell up and you go looking on the Internet for a fight you can't finish,
     try using Mayberry.com so you don't get in over your pointed little head.

     The ball's in your court, Monkeyspank.

From:   Nmmeeks@aol.com
Subject:    Rush on BJ U

Near the end of the second hour, a caller brought up Bob Jones University
and called them "fundamentalists" mentioning their beliefs on interracial dating, etc.

Limbaugh's reply was that Catholic priests couldn't marry.
In his ass-grime-encrusted brain, celibacy is equivalent to racism.

John Meeks

The Nasty Pigboy will defend racism until the day he strokes out.

Monkey Mail

From:   Dowden1221@aol.com
Subject:         typical



                                     THE JOKES ON ALL OF US,
                                                 AARON DOWDEN

If you want to be angry with someone, OK,
but please don't be angry with God.
He gave you that brain for a certain reason.

Great Here, Piggy Piggy Quotes

I don't need liberals on this show, because I can explain the liberal
 point of view better than any liberal, then knock it out of the park.

  -- The King of All Bovinity on his lil' hate show 2/21/00

New Feature at  bartcop.com

Who is Smirk Going to Kill This Week?

Thanks to gwbush.com

Click Here

Great Hag Quotes

Until New Hampshire, Mr. Bush's team assumed all he would need was
money, endorsements and organization. They planned to keep the national
media at bay and run out the clock. But then came Mr. McCain, with his
potent anti-Washington message mocking all the conventions.

W.'s problem was analogous to his father's in '92: an establishment
candidate with a weak message and communication skills outmaneuvered
by forces he never foresaw and did not know how to react to.

      -- Maureen Dowd, the Hag of Hate

Before I Forget

I'd like to thank the racist thugs of Carolina for saving our country.
By choosing the Great, White Dope over the unbeatable war hero,
you've moved Smirk a step closer to Comedy Heaven.

Carolina exit polls show those donkeys think Smirk is the reformer!
Swear to Koresh,
Mr. Old Money with the elite Republican Guard is a reformer!

Carolina exit polls show those toothless, inbred fascists think,
between the two, McCain ran the more negative campaign!

Yep, Carolina is Bush Country!


On behalf of Democrats everywhere,
Thank you, Carolina!

Dave Returns Tonight

Dave taped his first show since surgery Friday.
Of course, USA Today tells most of the jokes in today's paper,
but it will be nice to see Dave again.

Will Jay lose his ratings lead forever?

Doonesbury is Always Great


True GOP Quotes

It's been fun listening to Rush Limbaugh fulminate against John McCain.
"People shouldn't vote for McCain just because he's a straight-talking war hero,"
Limbaugh says. "People should decide on the issues."

During the Lewinsky affair, Rush was telling us how terrible it was
that Americans didn't care about character in their president.
Now he's upset because it's evident they do.
  -- Clinton-hating Pittsburgh Post-Gazette writer Jack Kelly,
      proving if you speak long enough, you'll say something true.

February 20, 2000

JennyQ Presents


...and he's off to Michigan!!

Until the election, I'm running series of reminders about why
religiously-insane Fascist dogs should not be trusted with power.

From James Carville's book, And the Horse He Road In On,

So there I was at the USAir Club, when I noticed an intense,
bespectacled man sidling up to me. I didn't recognize the guy,
but I figured I might've met him somewhere on the 1992 campaign trail,
so I gave him a nod and flashed him a big, friendly Serpenthead grin.

Suddenly, from out of the blue, this guy started spouting an unsolicited
and shameful tirade against the president.

"Your boy's getting rolled," muttered the stranger with undisguised glee.

I run into these goofy Clinton-hating types all the time, so I didn't give it
much thought at the time. "Just another hate radio fan," I thought.

(No doubt, he means the Nasty Pigboy and his army of ditto-monkeys.)

Now, we fast-forward to August 1994.
One day I settled into my couch watching CNN when, under the caption,
New Whitewater Independent Counsel, a familiar face stared back at me from the TV.
It all came back to me.

The new independent counsel was the weirdo from the airport.

...and the Clinton Cock Hunt was on!

I trust James Carville.

I don't think he made that story up.
I don't think he's mistaken about who the weirdo was.

If he's willing to put into writing that Kenneth Starr, Mr. Viagra-for-Clinton
walked up to him and said, "Your boy's getting rolled,"
I say that did happen.

That dirty, prejudiced, Bible-quoting tobacco whore Kenneth Starr was given
an assignment to reverse the national elections and he tried his very, very best,
but he lost to a better player.

No, we can't let them forget the shit they tried to pull these last two years.

George Will Tells Truth

In today's K-drag Sunday paper, George Will said,

"The stock market has been democratized.
 A majority of American families now own some form of common stock.
 Many of those families have scant, if any, experience with anything but
 a rising stock market.

 Their opitmism contrasts markedly with the pessimism from 1990,
 when the Gallup poll found that three-quarters of Americans
 expected their financial situation to be worse by 2000,
 64 percent expected it would be harder for young people to find jobs,
 70 percent expected retirement would be more difficult to afford,
 81 percent expected it would be harder to afford a home."
     -- George Will (R-Smug Bastard)

 ...and then came Bill Clinton and proved all that Reagan crap was false!

 Thanks to Clinton, our financial situation is better!
 It's easy for anyone to find a job these days.
 Retirement packages are up 300 percent.
 Last month set another record for home purchases.

 That's why they hate Clinton so much.
 That's why Clinton had to be impeached.

 He proved Reagan was a false god.

Robbie Knievel Cycle Jump

This Wednesday, the 23rd, Robbie Knievel is going to jump
an oncoming freight train on a cycle doing 120 miles per hour.

Very Confused Mail

From:  Larrfors@aol.com

I signed on to your site to find some legitimate antidotes to Rush Limbaugh -
I consider him to be a racist, liar and hippocrite.  Your site, however,
equals Limbaugh in vulgarity and bias.  Hopefully, somewhere out there
is a more rational response to Limbaugh, but it most certainly is not here.

Good-bye and don't bother to respond because
I won't waste my time checking in with you in the future.

Dear Sir or Madame,

bartcop.com  is not the Library of Congress.
YOU stumbled into a comedy page.
YOU made the newbie mistake,
opening your mouth before you knew the situation..

Besides, nobody equals Rush for vulgarity, but I'll admit to the bias.
I don't like Nazi whores, and I don't care who knows it.

 Drive-By BartCop
 What's this about Bette Midler giving money to ?

 Even if he seems not very anti-gay now, how do you think he's going to act
 once he joins the white-power Cro-Mags in the Republican Senate?


 Don't you think it's time the people at NASA got a raise?


 Question for Smirk:

 Now that Pat Robertson and Bob Jones has given you a victory,
 how are you going to repay them, Governor?


 The Laura Schlessinger Board Game?

    Bartcop, swear to Koresh, I saw an ad on a bus here in New York
hawking the Doc Meng board game.  At first I thought it was a joke, maybe some
strange promotional strategy, but when I went up for a closer look, there was
the Hasbro logo in the corner.  There's something really scary going on around here.

 Bob Jones University or Alan Keyes?

 From: JennyQ1@aol.com

 Subject: Bob Jones U Defends Smirk

 The following is a statement by Dr. Bob Jones III regarding the attacks made
 by Ambassador Alan Keyes against Governor George W. Bush during the recent
 S.C. presidential debate.

 In a televised debate Tuesday night among the three men who are candidates
 for the Republican Presidential nomination, Alan Keyes betrayed his friends
 at Bob Jones University with an outburst of sanctimonious hypocrisy. Like
 many of you, I feel hurt and angry that a man whose integrity I believed in
 has sold himself to the pressure of the media to use Bob Jones University as
 a whipping boy in the furtherance of his political ambition even as McCain
 has done.

 Concern for the media's reaction to him forced Dr. Keyes to take shots at the
 University when he was our invited guest on Monday; and in the debate
 Tuesday, he condemned Governor George Bush for not also doing so when he
 spoke here two weeks ago.

 Keyes revealed his hypocrisy and insincerity in the fact that during the 1996
 Presidential primaries, he also spoke here and never uttered a word of
 reproach against the University. He did so now only because the media
 expected him to do so. He caved in. George Bush didn't, and that makes him a
 far more honorable and trustworthy candidate.

 Since the Reagan campaign of 1980, selected Republican candidates have spoken
 here. Not one of them ever took advantage of that invitation in the manner
 that Dr. Keyes did on Monday. It is assumed when we invite them that we will
 not publicly critique them for their policies with which we disagree, and
 they should not be unethical and use our invitation as an occasion for
 criticizing those things about us over which they disagree.

 Why has the media now decided that the Presidential candidates are to be
 condemned if they do not criticize Bob Jones University in their speeches
 here? For 20 years, the media has not imposed upon these candidates the
 irrational requirement that they criticize us when speaking here.

 Could it be that the McCain camp goaded the media to engage in unjust
 criticism of Governor Bush for not abusing the University during his speech?
 The media hates George Bush and has said the most unkind and untrue things
 about BJU in its attempt to reflect on the Governor.

 Further evidence of Dr. Keyes's hypocrisy is the fact that on Tuesday before
 rebuking George Bush, he requested that the University send a musical group
 to his Friday night rally here in Greenville, and we were going to do so
 until his remarks at the debate. If we were as bad as he tried to make us out
 to be, why would he want our group to participate in his rally? I feel
 disappointed and betrayed that a man whom I thought was trustworthy and full
 of integrity has behaved in such a fashion.

What, No Ryder Truck?

From:  seliga@totcon.com

Subject:    maggot

you are a sick degenerate maggot.how in the hell can your mother[j.reno]raise a piece of manure like you.it should
have been a spent load.
thanks rush


In the K-Drag Sunday newspaper, there were two headlines:

Reform Surges in Iran
Hard-Liners Face First Losses Since 1979

and then, below,

Reform Dies in Carolina
Religious Fundamentalists Save Smirk

Great True Quotes

"Ralph Reed, Pat Robertson and Jerry Falwell are to be congratulated,"
   --   John Weaver, McCain's political director.

ha ha

Michigan doesn't fly a racist flag.
What's Smirk going to do to attract voters?

Positive Mail

Click Here

The Big Winners

Who were the big winners yesterday?
It's a wacky group, so hold on.

Governor Smirk
The Republican Washington establishment elite
Extremely rich people
The people of Texas
The Cancer Lobbee
The Rifle Lobbee
Environmental stocks (long-term only)
Dave, Jay, Conan, Bill, Jon and Dennis
Mrs. BartCop
Jaguars of Knuckledrag

So who were the big losers yesterday?

The American people
The Reform party
Legal immigrants
Lindsey Graham
ha ha
John McCain
Poor people
Gay people

...and this group of paid-for whores
Fox News
Brit Fume
Tony Snow
backdoor Bettina Gregory of ABC radio
Liddy and Ollie
Horendo Revolver
Sean (Puffy) Hannity
Bill O'Reilly
Paula Von Zahn
Larry (8-Wives) King
Linda Tripp
Paula Jones
Luci the Bat
Paul (H.M.) Harvey

..and the two BIG losers yesterday,
Laura (Spread 'Em?) Schlessinger
and the Nasty Pigboy Limbaugh

Who will pay them $20,000,000 a year
to fabricate and promote rape stories
about Republican President Smirk?

Econ 101

I slept through my college Economics courses, but I remembered one thing:
Imagine the black double line below is five miles of beach.
There's currently one snack bar on the beach.
Let's call that Snack Bar "G," for Gore.


Most of the red people are a lot closer to G than any other snack bar.
Oh, sure, some of the people in blue go to a snack bar in Carolina,
but that's going waaaay too far for most people.

Now, some rich boy who was given millions by his daddy wants to open a snack bar.
His name is Smirk, so we'll call that Snack Bar "S."

The thing I remembered from my Econ class was you want to put your snack bar
as close as you can to Snack Bar "G," to draw the most people.

Anyone with an education will tell you to place that snack bar as follows:


What "S" would be doing,  is cutting G's customers in half,
while guaranteeing himself the right flank.
But nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

The Smirk-monster is determined  to screw this up like Dole and his daddy did.


The crazy bastard built his snack bar on the right-wing of the beach,
guaranteeing success to the Snack Bar "G."

Since he won Carolina, Gov. Smirk has gotten a little smug.

Voter:  "But Governor, I can't afford health insurance for my family..."

February 19, 2000

Ode to Smirk

Oh, cry me a river, Georgy Porgy Puddin' Smirk,

Who remains closed minded on the Confederate Flag
While lamenting South Carolina's open primary as a drag.

You became road kill on the way to your coronation.
The family merit badge no longer causes a sensation.

For all the money, machinations and political spin -
How amazingly pathetic if you don't manage to win.

Cosmic Coultrane

Great Smug Bastard Quotes

"I'm sorry. I wish I could wave a wand."
    -- Gov Smirk to the mother of a boy whose chronic,
        life-threatening illness is not covered by her insurance.

Kid's Names

Remember Bill Schneider's idiotic comment on CNN that,
"Nobody is naming their kid Bill Clinton,'" was the best line in the debate?

Click Here

"The family decided to name him after the president 'because he's the man
who saved myself, my family and my people,' said Rifat Bislimi."

Thanks to MShemo

To Paramount Television

Earlier this month, George W. Bush went to Bob Jones University,
which is known for being a close-minded, bigoted institution.
Everyone agrees it was a tremendous mistake, a mistake that
may cost him the general election if he gets past John McCain.

Recently, Paramount Television has chosen to hire a close-minded bigot.
It was a tremendous mistake to hire Laura Schlessinger.
No matter what she promises you, she's going to attack gay people.
How could Paramount associate themselves with a close-minded bigot?

It's just a matter of time.
It's not "if" she will attack gay people, it's "when."
For years, this awful woman has used God to justify her gay-bashing,
and now she'll be using Paramount Television to broadcast that hate.

The day you put her on the air is the last day I will watch UPN.
I've been a Star Trek fan for many years, but I will program my remote
to no longer access UPN in our home. My kids are big wrestling fans,
but they will no longer watch your various Smackdown programs.

Other programs we will no longer watch are Frasier, The Sentinel,
Seven Days, JAG, Entertainment Tonight and Hard Copy.

I just can't get over the idea that you're doing this willingly.
Allow me to predict the future for you:
Laura Schlessinger is going to open her mouth and spew out the hate speech
that gays are "biological mistakes" and "pedophiles" and when she does,
you will be forced to issue a press release saying how surprised you are at her.

This will be a lie.

You know who you're hiring.
You know exactly what you're getting.
You're getting David Duke, Tim McVeigh and Rush Limbaugh with a vagina.

Maybe I'm wrong to closely associate Paramount with Star Trek, but I can't help
but be reminded of Gene Roddenberry and his vision of the future without
this hatred that Laura Schlessinger pushes at every opportunity.

By taking this action, you have become Laura Schlessinger.

Paramount, how could you?


Over 1,000 hits per day,
Telling people what you've done.

 Today is the Big Day

C'mon, you racist Republicans.
Vote for Smirk!

Smirk would be the ultimate dream candidate for us,
but that damn McCain would be hard to beat.

They say people aren't looking at the issues when they vote McCain.
We NEED people to look at the issues, so Vote for Smirk!

C'mon you race-baiting, Dixie-loving white power traditionalists!
Get your friends and neighbors and go Vote for Smirk!

I just realized last night that if McCain wins, the country will go to shit
and Mrs. BartCop doesn't get the Jaguar, setting up a lose-lose proposition.

Vote for Smirk!

  has been raising money from some interesting people.

Charlton Heston                  $1,000
Richard Mellon Scarfe         $1,000
Mike Ditka                          $1,000
Bette Midler                        $1,000
Christie Todd Whitman        $1,000

A gun nut, a rich nut, a draft nut, a harlot and a baby-killer.

Mail Bag

From:  bo8613a@american.edu

> Actually a newsletter i get via email contained this tidbit...I was surprised:

"And last, a note to all those South Carolina cross-dressing Demo Confederate
flag offendees, who plan to for vote for Mr. McCain.  You may recall he said,
"I have ancestors who have fought for the Confederacy, none of whom owned slaves."

Turns out his great-great-grandfather, William Alexander McCain, owned 52 slaves on
the family's plantation in the Mississippi Delta. Better get that McCain flag down."

Brian Olexy

If his family has been slave-free since 1860, he's telling the truth.

McCain was born in 1937,
his dad maybe in 1910,
grandpa maybe in 1885,
great-grandpa maybe in 1860,
great-great-grandpa must've been near 1835,
so I'll bet he's telling the truth - this time.

 Let's hope Smirk wins today,


February 18, 2000

Cunningham Returns!

Clinton Fatigue?

Click on the chart.

America LOVES a winner,
and will not tolerate a loser.

Mr. Gorsky Update

From: glensmith@mindspring.com

Subject:   Mr. Gorsky

Oh, Lordy JEE-zus!  I can't believe you posted that tripe!
It's one rung above the Neiman-Marcus cookie recipe
on the internet disinformation ladder!


Koresh, I'm catching a lot of shit over that.
Sixteen letters so far, and it's only been about three hours.
That's almost as much as the Mariah Carey tsunami,
but without the massive documentation flood that followed.

I'm just too trusting - must be remnants of Catholicism.
I'll stick to political quotes.

You should pick up a copy of this book written by my good friend
Joe Conason and Gene Lyons. I consider him my good friend because,
unlike James Carville and Molly Ivins, Joe answered my e-mail.

I tried to buy a copy at lunch, but Borders doesn't have it yet,
so I'll get it from amazon.com.


Click Here to order it

Let's Have a Party

Besides the Nasty Pigboy, I can't think of anybody who deserves it more
than that snotty little Laura Schlessinger, the paid-for, spread-her-legs slut.


When Andy Rooney belittled Native Americans ... he got suspended.
When golf announcer Ben Wright mocked lesbians... he got fired.
When writer Jimmy Breslin denigrated Asians... he got suspended.
When Marge Schott disparaged African-Americans... she got fired.
When Reggie White attacked gays... he got dropped by CBS and Campbell's Soup.
When Jimmy-The-Greek stereotyped blacks... he got fired.

But Dr. Laura calls gays "biological mistakes"
... and she's getting a TV show from Paramount?

Enough is enough.  Paramount pulled a show in 1998 that offended
African-Americans ("The Secret Diary of Desmond Pfeiffer"), but it's fine
when Dr. Laura equates homosexuality with incest and pedophilia?


E-Mail Paramount now and demand Dr. Harpy's show be sucked into a sink.
Tell Paramount you won't watch any of their shows if  Doc Spred 'Em gets a show.
Then send this message to everyone in your address book.

Paramount's email address:


(Be sure and use the name, "Dr. Laura."
 If you protest the "nasty bitch who spreads her legs for a camera,"
 they may not know which nasty bitch you mean.)

"How many letters have I read on the air from gay men who acknowledge that
a huge portion of the male homosexual populace is predatory on young boys?''
  - Dr. Laura quoted by Reuters/Variety, Feb. 13, 2000.

 From:  boydstun@foxinternet.net

 Another thing we always hear from the Gipper's apologists is that Congress
 promised budget cuts but never delivered.

 One thing all of  Reagan's budgets had in common are his signature making them law.
 If Reagan was so unhappy with the budget proposals,

 He didn't have the balls that President Clinton had to stand up for his values
 and shut down the government if necessary.

 As these ding-a-lings rewrite history, let's remember the truth.

Say what?

Smirk claims he has the endorsement of 38 senators and 178 representatives,
but in the last debate in Carolina he said one reason we had to have a tax cut
was because Congress couldn't be trusted.

Doc Harpy - Moving Even Farther to the Right

About a year ago, I specifically remember hearing the screeching bitch say
that no teacher was ever going to physically discipline her precious Dheirechhek.
I remember this clear as a bell, because she was bragging that with her black belt,
she might give the offending teacher a taste of her own medicine.

But when a lying whore sees the size of the check in the mailbox,
all the high and mighty principles in the world go right into the toilet.

I just heard her ream some distraught young mother who called to ask the whiney
bitch's opinion because her child had been physically disciplined at school.

What was the child's "crime?"
How severe was the punishment?

We'll never know, because those minutia aren't important.

"Whatever he did, he deserved whatever punishment he got.
 That's what you get when you misbehave."

Can you believe that?
Of course you can.
The Bitch is being paid to be extremely right-wing.

As you know, I was held in a Catholic concentration camp for twelve years.
We were accustomed to threats of beatings.  I personally witnessed dozens of beatings,
but I was never beaten personally. (You can tell, because that school is still standing.)

I remember once, probably third grade, I was caught "talking," which I admit is the
Crime of the Century, so I was made to kneel on concrete while holding a fucking
geography book in each hand outstretched from my body.

I saw my cousin slapped hard in the face over a dozen times because he refused
to speak to a nun obviously having a heavy-flow day. She was screaming "Answer me,"
at the poor bastard, but he refused to say a word. He just stared at her and had his face
slapped back and forth.  She beat him while 300 of us stood at attention and watched.
That was several decades ago, and I can still see his head - left, right, left, right.
...pretty goddamn chilling.

I also remember my next-door neighbor, completely insane with rage, going to
the rectory (odd name for a priest's quarters, don't you think?) demanding to see a priest
so he could kick his ass because a nun grabbed his daughter by the hair and repeatedly
ran her head into the blackboard for forgetting her homework and he wanted to beat
some priest half to death because beating up a nun "was wrong."

Bottom line?
Catholic schools are PRIVATE schools.
When you sign up, you agree to give those religi-crazies written permission to do
whatever they like to your kids.  But PUBLIC schools, where you must attend
by law, do NOT have the right to beat your kids for any whim of a reason.

I assume the guilty shit whose mother called Doc Harpy's show was in public
school, but we'll never know because The Harp didn't want to hear any details.

"Whatever he did, he deserved whatever punishment he got.
  That's what you get when you misbehave."

(God, thank you for blessing me with the best parents a kid ever had.)

Y'know, about two years ago,
Doc Harpy was against gay bashing.
Doc Harpy was against guns in the home.
Doc Harpy was against corporal punishment.
I heard her myself, so don't write and say "you're misinformed."

But better people than her have turned whore for a nickle.
Have you ever heard the Cindy Lauper song, "Money Changes Everything?"
I think she might've written it for Laura spread-my-legs Schlessinger.
This disgusting slut saw the Nasty Pigboy raking in all that money
and became pitifully jealous and decided she could mimic his hate rhetoric
so she became Limba with a vagina and look at the money pouring in!

What is the point of getting an education?
Why drag yourself up from the dregs of ignorance if you're just
going to reject everything you learned for Pontius Pilate's silver?

...and on top of it all, she constantly tells these poor, struggling braindead people
that they should quit their jobs to keep their kids away from the terrors of day care,
because having enough money to live comfortably "just isn't worth it."

Oh, I need a drink...

 From yesterday:
 That's what the GOP stands for: Sex police!
 The GOP - party of Linda Tripp and Luci the Bat!
 The GOP - party of Paula Jones and Larry Klayman.
 The GOP - party of Barr, Burton, Livingston and Gingrich, all of whom were diddling
 someone besides their wives while screaming at Clinton's "immoral behavior."

 BC, don't forget Arkansas's own Hutchinson brothers, both leaders in the
 prosecution, both the only Congressmen educated at Bob Jones University.
 Tim Hutchison, having an affair while prosecuting the president,
 and his holy brother knowing about it and saying nothing.

 Sonny Scott

 True Story?

 From: Eddy W. Collins  ecollins@ong.com

 On July 20, 1969, Neil Armstrong became the first person to set foot on the moon.
 His first words were, "That's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind."
 But just before he re-entered the lander, he made the enigmatic remark:
"Good  luck, Mr. Gorsky."

 Many people at NASA thought it was a casual remark concerning some rival  Soviet
 Cosmonaut. However, upon checking, there was no Gorsky in either the Russian
 or American space programs.

 Over the years many people what "Good luck, Mr. Gorsky" meant,
 but Armstrong always just smiled.

 On July 5, 1995, in Tampa Bay, Florida, while answering questions following a speech,
 a reporter brought up the 26-year-old question to Armstrong. This time he responded.
 Mr. Gorsky had died and so Neil Armstrong felt he could answer the question.

 In 1938 when he was a kid in a small mid-west town, he was playing baseball with
 a friend in the backyard. His friend hit a fly ball, which landed in his neighbor's yard by
 the bedroom windows. His neighbors were Mr. and Mrs.Gorsky.
 As he retrieved the ball, young Armstrong heard Mrs. Gorsky shouting at Mr. Gorsky.

 "Sex! You want sex?!

 You'll get sex when the kid next door walks on the moon!"

From:  btw72@aol.com

What do Ross Perot and the Shrub sound like
when they have sex with their wives?

"Can I finish?   Can I finish?  Can I finish?"

Smirk Tells Black Minister "Sit Down"
All-white crowd bursts into applause.

Click Here

Top Abortion-Rights Group Stuns Bradley by Endorsing Gore

NARAL pledged yesterday to put its more than 300,000 members and its resources
behind Gore now - and in the general election if he wins the nomination.

"We reject attempts to use this issue as a political wedge to divide pro-choice voters,"
said NARAL president Kate Michelman. "We are unhappy and very disappointed
that the Bradley campaign is using it in this fashion."

NARAL said it did not take issue with Bradley's position on abortion.
"It's his tactics that are unacceptable, and I think very harmful," Michelman said.

Bradley said he was stunned by the decision. He noted that NARAL gave him a
99 percent rating for his abortion-rights voting record as a senator from New Jersey.

Hey, Bill!
I got a hot thunderbolt for you.
Even if you have a rating of 550,
there's no excuse for being a dick.

I don't know if the NAACP endorses candidates in the primaries,
but after that Willie Horton shit you pulled,
to the extreme delight of the Nasty Pigboy and Fox News,
I hope every black person in America takes it personally
that you brought up Willie Horton after 12 years.

You're running a Dole/Smirk style campaign, Bill.
Enjoy your retirement.
Maybe Michael will let you be a waiter at his restaurant.

Hall of Fame E-Mail
(Is this the best letter I've ever read?)

From:    henke30@yahoo.com

Subject:    scream dream

Dear Bartcop -

I'm a Republican by registration but a Democrat by aversion to Starr's
sexual McCarthyism and Rush's inspired McVeighism.  The space between
GOP rhetoric and reality makes the Grand Canyon look like a rat hole.
For the GOP to waste 40 million on Clinton's cock and 70 million on Bush's smirk
while claiming fiscal responsibility adds up only to certifiable delusion.

Please permit me to make a suggestion:
After a salient point, there should be a link that prompts Roger Daltrey's primal scream
in "Won't Get Fooled Again." The scream would represent the recognition and response
to the political insanity, which the Limba sheep foolishly embrace and the free thinkers
(those with an IQ higher than, say, 20) wisely stand athwart.

Irony 1
The GOP machine supports Smirk because he supposedly will attract in the
general election moderates and traditional Democrats. Yet, the GOP machine hates
McCain for doing in the state primaries what Bush plans to do in the general.
For this, the GOP slurs and stabs in the back a war hero?

Click here ____ (Daltrey's primal scream)

Irony 2
McCain/Smirk take umbrage at being compared to, gasp, Clinton (them be
fightin' words). "I'm trustworthy" and "I'll never lie to you" are the mantra.

Bold political statements, aren't they?

Yet when asked how they would, hypothetically, counsel their pregnant daughter
on the abortion issue, McCain /Smirk act aghast, saying the question is TOO personal.
So, McCain/Smirk think the prospect of murdering their grandchild (using Keyester's logic)
is a private matter and has no public policy relevance WHILE Clinton trying to keep
his personal life private is worthy of public scrutiny?

Click here ____ (Daltrey's primal scream)

Irony 3
Is Smirk's irrational hatred of Clinton inadvertently burning the Bush family tree?
At Bob Jones University, Pander Smirk repudiates Clinton, not Bob Jones,
whose chancellor labeled his daddy the devil and his brother's inter-racial marriage
displeasing before God.

Clinton, remember, bombed Iraq upon learning of an alleged assassination plot
against Butch; whereas Pander Smirk won't lay a kid glove on Bob Jones
for assassinating his father's character.

The Bob Jones affair occurred amid allegations that Smirk didn't have the desire to be president,
AS THOUGH devaluing his family wasn't proof otherwise,
AS THOUGH treating his family like a nun in Ted Nugent's way wasn't proof otherwise,
AS THOUGH proving "compassionate conservatism" is an oxymoron.
(That's why the Smirk campaign dumped the sappy slogan.)

Click here ____ (Daltrey's primal scream)




Excellent letter, and excellent Nugent ref.
A+  for you, Sir.

February 17, 2000

See  Previous Issue

Back to the  bartcop.com  home page

Privacy Policy
. .