Volume 313 - Keeping Secrets

October 30, 2000

 From: GOPBias@aol.com

 Subject: George W - Willie Horton

 Crunch Time

 We have been asked innumerable times
"What is the significance of the Media/Press shielding George W. Bush from...
 or, in some instances actually deleting...his responsibility for the placement of the
 racist Willie Horton ads on television?" The significance is that if Mr. Bush's
 key role was common knowledge, he would have difficulty using his political mantra
 "In my administration we will ask not only what is legal...but what is right!
 In my administration we'll make it clear there is a controlling legal authority
 of conscience!" in these closing days.

 The details of Mr. Bush's personal and public history are documented on the
 new Republican Bias in the Media.

 Click  Here

 "I promise I'll never embarrass you."

 Don't you think it's time the Republican Party stood up and said,

 "It's OK, the joke's over. We just wanted to see if a low-wattage idiot
   could get elected, but we won't actually let this moron take power..."

 From: rjpix@primenet.com

 Subject: What's with your fucking Governor?

 Just what's up with your idiot fucking governor? After all Clinton did after
 the Bombing, he still shits all over him and Gore.

 I know it's tough for me living up here in Red Neck Holler, but shit, man,
 it's gotta be hell living in Oklahoma!

 No wonder you love Chinacao and I love Cuban cigars.

 Take care....Bob

 -For bold and hard hitting political commentary visit www.atwitsend.org

 Scary, isn't it?

 Mrs. Carnahan Will Accept Senate Seat
  Newcomer would be in freshman class with Hillary

 ROLLA, Mo. (AP) - Declaring ``we worked as partners'' during 46 years of marriage,
 Gov. Mel Carnahan's widow said Monday she'll accept appointment to the Senate if
 her late husband outpolls his Republican opponent on Election Day.

 Dry-eyed and speaking in a steady voice, Jean Carnahan said she would carry
 on the vision of her husband, a two-term Democrat who was killed along with
 their eldest son and an aide in a plane crash two weeks ago.

``With the support of my family and an abiding faith in a living God, I've
 decided to do what Mel would have wanted us to do. `To keep the cause alive.
 To continue the fight for the values and ideals for which he lived.''

 C'mon, Missouri.
 We need to win this one!
 Ashcroft must go.

From: (withheld)

Subject: Stupid Quote

"An ounce of breast milk is even more potent than the finest tequila."
    - Singer Tori Amos, about feeding her new baby for the first time.

Editor's note: I don't believe her.

 From:  randall_guyton@yahoo.com

 Subject: food for thought

 One can ask; Is Bartcop a true liberal or a "Gore lackey"?

 ha ha
 One could ask that.
 One could ask any question.

 A quote from a column by Robert McChesney:

 "Ralph Nader is not the reason Gore's campaign is struggling.
 Gore has has ample opportunity to make his case before the American voters.
 Gore had a ten point lead in some polls in September.
 As that lead disappeared, most of the votes shifted to Bush, not Nader."

 The first three sentences are true for sure.

 "In fact, surveys show that a significant percentage of Nader's supporters
 -- perhaps a majority -- either would not vote or would vote for someone other than
 Gore were Nader not in the race. Most of those sympathetic to Nader but scared
 about a Bush  presidency have already decided to vote for Gore."

 ha ha
 If Nader voters are willing to force President Smirk on us,
 I think it's very hard to predict what they'll do next.

 "Al Gore, and Al Gore alone, has blown his golden opportunity."

 Nothing has been blown yet, but still - the math is the math.
 If Nader gets a bigger percent than the margin of victory for Smirk,
 the Nader voters will have turned Alaska into a giant oil slick.

 Great Smirk Quotes

 "As president, I'm here in Knoxville, Tennessee, to tell
   America I'll set a new tone in Washington."

  Smirk, so far, you're president of your fan club and that's all.


 Pigboy says a "big bomb" is coming this week.
 He says it'll hit Wednesday or Thursday.
 He's telling the sheep to be prepared.
 He said, "It's not really that bad," which makes it sound BIG time.
 He says the Smirk camp knows it's coming and is preparing for it.
 He says he knows what the secret is, but he promised no to say,
 except to warn his sheep that, "it's not really all that bad."

 Gee, I wonder which story is breaking?

 The secret bastard son?
 Smirk's first marriage?
 His cocaine arrest mug shots?
 Proof that Daddy fixed his service record?
 His DWI arrest records?

 Do you think before this campaign is over,
 somebody will explain what Smirk means when he says,
 "We must guard against the soft bigotry of low expectations?"

 I think it was in the second hour today, Pigboy was lying his fat ass off
 about how "sincere" and "from the heart" Smirk's stump speech is lately.

 "He means it so much, it's so ingrained in his heart, he doesn't need
  any paragraphs (another stroke-addled slip for the mentally-dying Pigboy)
  because it's coming from his deep convictions."

 The truth is, after 18 months, Smirk has finally memorized his speech.
 Nobody else would ever attempt such obvious and blantant horseshit as Limba,
 telling to sell "inevitable memorization" as "honest sincerity."
 How can Smirk be considered "honest and sincere" if nobody can understand him?


 ha ha

 I wonder why Gore has allowed Smirk to get away with the idea
 that we MUST have a Texas-sized tax cut "to stimulate the economy."

 Everybody knows the economy is over-stimulated now.
 That's why the Fed keeps raising interest rates.

 There's an old rule in debating that any statement your opponent makes
 that's not answered becomes the truth. Some people now think that we
 "need" this huge tax cut to "stimulate" that which is already too hot.

 So Smirk has been allowed to crow about the need to "stimulate the economy"
 that's already over-heated, and nobody (like Gore) has called him on that.

 Win or lose, Gore has run a Dole-style campaign.

From: guynunya@hotmail.com

Subject: You're so sad

Just noting how pathetic and hypocritical you are on so many fonts.
Concerning your "jokes," I dare say it would be a much more humerus
and effective site were it not so vile, low brow, and full of shit.

Wit in lieu of low brow whoopiecushion humer; inteligence and cleverness
instead of stopping to the level of vulger, ammoral, small-minded,
right wing Neanderthals to much to ask I suppose.

"You know that man you hate?
  You look more like him every day."

Liberal elitist?
I guess I am.
Better than being a gutter-dweller.

 Subject: Idaho FM radio fires 3 for prank
   Boys called threat into White House for promise

 Three employees of a local radio station were fired last week
 after a prank lead to a threat against President Clinton.

 KISS FM's regional operations manager, Brad Chambers and his son
 Ryan Chambers, who is a production assistant with the station, were
 fired on Oct. 18 after U.S. Secret Service agents responded to a
 threatening call to the White House. An unidentified part-time
 employee also was fired for his involvement in the prank.

 According to Dick Lummenello, who is general manager for the company,
 Ryan Chambers and another employee received numerous phone calls from
 two local teen-age boys requesting that the station play a certain song.
 Despite being repeatedly told that the station would not play the song
 they were requesting, the two teens continued to call.

 Lummenello said Ryan Chambers and the other employee got tired of
 the repeated calls. The teens were eventually told that they could win
 an undisclosed amount of money if they would call an 800 number and
 participate in a commonly known radio contest.

 "They were told to call the number and say the 'phrase that pays.'"

 The actual 800 number was to the White House,
 and "I'm going to kill the president" was the phrase that paid.

 Lummenello said after calling the White House and making the threat,
 the teens were placed on hold and transferred to the offices of the
 Secret Service, where agents made a trace of the phone call.

"But they really didn't have to run a trace because the boys voluntarily gave
 them their names because they thought they'd won something," Lummenello said.
 "I don't even think they really knew that they had really threatened the president.

"But before they could get off the phone,  two agents were at their door."

 More Smirk Skeletons

 Click  Here

 Can you believe this?

 After whooping the number two team, Kansas State,
 then whooping the number one team, Nebraska,
 a lone donkey sports-writer refused to vote Oklahoma number one.

 He voted for Florida State, the number FOUR team.

 Shouldn't he be fired?

 Nader Sleletons

 Click  Here

I have a question:

Suppose there was no Monica Lewinsky.
What would Po' Kenny's impeachment referral have looked like?

...and they say it's not about sex?

If you take away Monica,
the intern who brought pizza to the president,
where is the crime they needed to impeach Bill Clinton?

 I see where USA TODAY had a story Friday about term limits,
and which Republicans kept their word and which Republicans lied.

 If course, they gave Uncle OJ Watts and Jesus Twin Largent a pass,
 because they are two good Christian men who didn't actually intend
 to lie to get elected, so we forgive them and USA TODAY, right?

 When the local papers pressed Uncle OJ for a reason why he broke his
 pledge to serve until 2000 and then step down, he said, Swear to Koresh,
 "I never put that in writing."

 So if you ever deal with Uncle OJ, be sure he signs his name.

 ...and then there's everybody's favorite Christian, Steve Largent.
 Largent and Coburn (fellow Jesus Twin) came in together.
They made joint promises to serve three terms and come home.

 Coburn, to his credit, kept his word.
 Repeat, the super-Christian actually kept his word.
 Largent, however, is a power-hungry bastard.
 He loves being a top money-raiser for the GOP.
 He loves being the center of attention, just like in the old days
 when he was going accross the middle for the Seahawks.

 When the local papers asked Largent why he lied, he said,
 "I'd like to keep my word, but there are still hills to climb."

 I don't think, in all 310 issues, I've ever been that full of shit...
 But now Largent, who's running for re-election un-opposed,
 says he'll just serve one more term, then he'll be governor.

 You see, he's sick and fucking tired of being one of 435 stars.
 He can come back to Oklahoma and walk right into the Governor's
 mansion ( he's assuming Smirk will win and appoint Gov. Keating
 to some cabinet post) and be a star again, BIG time.

 Seems like when I was a kid, the First Commandment was,
 "Thou shall not put false gods before me."

 Isn't the insatiable lust for more and more power a false god?
 And if you have to break your word to acheive that power,
 well, Christ understands political deal-making, right?

 I mean, keeping your word and following the Commandments are all
 well and good, but if there is power to be sized, He can take a joke, right?

 Too often, "Christians" sicken me.
 Jesus is used as a tool to fool the extra-stupid people.
 No shortage of those people in Oklahoma...

 I realize all career politicians lie, but I hate it when they cloak themselves
 in the Holy Bible and then lie their greedy asses off.  I guarantee I have
 more respect for Jesus Christ than any "Christian" politician/salesman.

 It disgusts me.
 It should disgust you, too

 If you're a Christian, it should disgust you times twenty,
 but as long as Largent pretends he's holier than the rest of us,
 the cave-people of Oklahoma will reward him because, after all,
 Steve caught a lot of passes that won a lot of football games,
 and if you don't think that's important, you're not from Oklahoma.

 More than anyone, Christ understands the Reagan theory of,
 "If you can't get a loaf of bread, get half a loaf."

 If Largent and Uncle OJ just lie half the time, if they just break half
 their promises, that still makes them superior to the "secular Democrats."

 You know it, I know it, and Christ knows it.

 And if you read the papers, you know Oklahoma just suspended
 a school girl for putting a hex on a teacher, causing her to be sick.

 I am not making this up.

 More guns, more God and less education.
 That's the Oklahoma motto.
 That's the GOP motto.
 If we have some really bad luck in 9 days,
 it may become America's motto.

 Hillary is looking good...

 Click  Here

From: democr8@hotmail.com

Subject: Third Parties

Hey Bartcop,

I found your site during Demo-Con 2K and haven’t missed a day since then
(ok, so maybe I missed a day or two, but I always go back to see what I missed
… please do not interpret my slight exaggeration as a mortal character flaw).

I wanted to talk about the third party candidates. First off, Nader. This guy bugs me.
I’m a bit young to remember his hay-day, but I always respected him for what he did.
Now, he’s running for president because he says there is no difference between Dems
and Repubs. I might expect to hear this from an ‘undecided’ voter who hasn’t been
paying attention for the last 2 years, but come on … he strikes me as an intelligent fellow.

He must know that there are numerous, and significant, differences.
So how could anyone come to any other conclusion except that he is flat out lying?!
And when asked, on several occasions, who he would vote for if he had to chose
between Gore and Smirk, he has said, ‘without hesitation’, Smirk. Smirk … who wants
to open the Arctic Preserve to the Oil companies.  Smirk … who wants to destroy the unions.
Smirk … whose idea to continue economic prosperity is to invest in coat hangers!

Now, Nader strikes me as an intelligent fellow, so he must know that Bush will be working
to undue everything he has been fighting to accomplish. So how could anyone come to any
other conclusion except that he is a hypocrite?! In the end, I don’t think the Nader vote will
amount to much. Most of those considering him will eventually fall into the Gore column
(all except the diehard supporters … who are overwhelmingly white, middle class,
males who don’t stand to lose as much as minorities, the poor or women).

But worse than losing the election, I think Ralph is going to end up losing respect.
Because there are those of us who now look at Nader as a lying hypocrite willing
to sell out his own principles, not to mention the prosperity and personal freedoms
of his supporters, in order to stroke his own ego.

Just some thoughts



Did you see the Nader/Sam Donaldson debate on This Whore Sunday?

Sam: What if you throw the election to Bush.

Nader: Not my problem, they're two peas in a pod.

Sam: How can you say that?
          Bush wants to drill in Alanka, Gore says he'll prevent that.
          I thought you were an environmentalist.

Nader: That's just rhetoric - nothing more.

Sam: How can you say "It's just rhetoric?" When they say something
          it's just rhetoric, but if you say it, we should believe you?

Nader: I have a 37-year record of not wavering.

BartCop: What? You have a 37-year record?
                 Where? With who? Your employees?
                 You've never been in a race in your life.
                 You've never had to prove anything, up to and including today.
                  It's easy to claim you've never waivered
                  if you've never taken the field, Mr Nader.

 If you're not sure which way to vote, Betty Bowers has put up
 a non-partisan Christian Voter's Guide - highly recommended.

 Click  Here  for her superior, on-line version

 Click  Here  for the forever version

 By the way, Betty's Christian son R.J. Bowers broke the NCAA all-division career
 rushing record for yards gained holding a football.

 Bowers, who wears No. 33 in honor of one-time record-holder Tony Dorsett, carried
 26 times for 128 yards and three touchdowns against Bethany College on Saturday,
 giving him 6,999 yards in four seasons.

 When asked how her famous son could gain so many yards, Ms. Bowers told  reporters,
 "R.J. imagines Bill Clinton behind him trying to engage him in some demonic
   homosexual encounter and he runs like the wind, praise His name."

 Read the  Previous Issue
 It was the best issue we've ever done.

 Go Home to  bartcop.com

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