Volume 337 - Countercoup

 November 23, 2000  - Thanksgiving
 If you're not sure what to be thankful for, be thankful for our military men and women.

From:  skisics@yahoo.com

Subject:  Dear Gov. Bush

As you recall we first did an x-ray of your prostate and found nothing unusual.
Next we ran a PSA test and did find elevated levels.

Our next step would be to do exploratory surgery to see what's really in there,
but since you view machines as more reliable, we'll stick with the x-ray.

Good luck with your future,

Your doctors!

 I'm not exactly sure what this is,
 but I sure like the way it starts.

 Click  Here


From: mwo@mediawhoresonline.com

Subject: Enemies of Democracy and America

An enemy of democracy is an enemy of America.
He is, for example, a person who KNOWS the majority of a state's voters voted
or believed they voted for his opponent - but does everything in his power to keep
the WILL OF THE PEOPLE from ever seeing the light of day.

Gore does not fit this defintion. Bush does.


The exit polls were correct, and Gore probably won by over ten thousand votes.

Bush would oppose a Palm Beach revote, for example - even for only those who
voted the first time. Why? Well, we ALL know why. He knows the vast majority
of those 19,000 double punched ballots were intended for Gore. And he knows
that Buchanan only received about 400 of that 3400 votes.

But he doesn't care.
He just wants to win at all costs, including sweeping the WILL OF THE PEOPLE under the rug.

Evil hates the light.

Bush hates anything that will get us closer to exposing what the majority of Florida voters
intended to do on election day, but were prevented from doing due to illegal ballots and
bogus roadblocks - that is, VOTE FOR AL GORE.

How can any Bush supporter (all of whom certainly know that most voters intended to
elect Gore in Florida) hold his head up knowing that Mr. Gore won both Florida AND
the national popular vote, and Bush's "victory" depends on BURYING that fact?

To continue to support Bush means that a person favors keeping intact ELECTION FUCKUPS
which deny people their vote - and it makes one an enemy of democracy.

Bush can never be a legitimate president. Gore won.

 The Brew Says "Hey"

 Click  Here

The Realm of Bizarre

Old King George was a merry old soul, and a merry old soul was he.
He called forth for voters, to see how they spoke, to see if it was him, or me.
The votes came in and sure looked grim, so he sent out an urgent decree.
Out went the word to the minister of elections, to stop this vote like a bad infection.
And when the final tally neared, and it looked like Gore might hold it dear,
King George shouted out "Stop the recount; Freeze the vote; I think it's good enough for close."

No more counting! It's me! It's me! It's not even close, don't you see?
The people demanded that we stop the vote, in order that I may finally gloat.
"Foul" cried the people, I think you forgot, to add our vote, in to the lot.
Nonsense, said George, you've had your chance. I know you can vote, but I forgot how to count.
It's not fair to count more, the people have spoken. It's George by a whisker, the minister has spoken.

But then from the distance a sound could be heard. The echoes grew louder its sound like a stir.
The chad they came running to see what's the clatter; they start falling from cards and that's surely to matter.
And when the dust  settles, the point becomes clear, the will of the people shall be what we hear.
And so today in a land not so far, lives old king George, in the realm of Bizarre.
Where up is down, and elephants fly, we can find King George, asleep by and by.
He wakes with a start, to find himself free. He exclaims with a grimace, I guess it's not me.

 Power at Any Price
   by James Higdon

 Click  Here

 Here's something that looks pretty good.

 Click  Here

 It's the Maverick Republican.


 Click  Here

 Millionaire just said The Flintstones were on TV before The Honeymooners.

 I think that's wrong.
 I think the Flintstones started in 1960, and Jackie and Art
 were doing Ralph and Ed in the fifties.

Plus, there's the always-reliable  Buck Fush

 Steve Kangas, (murdered by Richard Mellon Scaife?) still has a presence on the net.

 Click  Here

 I'd like to congradulate Dallas on the scoring of their only touchdown in 10 quarters.

 Breaking Faith  by Bob Herbert

 By threatening to take the matter to the Republican-controlled Florida Legislature,
 Mr. Bush and the Republicans are signaling their willingness to attempt to deny the
 presidency to the winner of the popular vote nationally, the popular vote in Florida
 and a majority of the Electoral College.

 That should make you nervous.

 Click  Here

From: Latzmark@erols.com

Subject: Legitimate President vs. AlGore

Yo Bartcop,

Deal with this: Bush WON the Florida votes; Bush WON the mandated recount;
Bush WON the illegal recounts. Notice a pattern here? Bush WON; get over it!

ha ha
You mean because his brother and campaign manager said so?
You don't think we should bother counting the votes?

Are you so dense that having a Democrat in the Whitehouse is more imortant than the law?

My "density" has nothing to do with it.
You can't be serious about wanting that moron in the White House.
You can't want victory at the cost of endangering the country.

Should AlGore win the state of Florida, it won't be by the legal VOTE,
it will be by the legal wrangling of the law by Democrat lawyers argueing
before Democrat judges who deign to legislate from the bench, rather than
letting the dully elected legislators decide the laws of the land, or in this case, state.

What year did you graduate from EIB University?
Are you one of those nuts that say the Supreme Court has no business interpreting the law?

Whats next; the Supreme's of Florida declaring AlGore King Billy the Sleaze II?

ha ha
You're not thinking clearly.
It's a good thing for you that Clinton couldn't run again.
He would've wiped Ol' Smirk off the map.

I'm sorry Bartcop, but the ends don't justify the means; at least thats the way
America is supposed to work. Your boy AlGore will stop at NOTHING to get
to the Whitehouse, laws be damned, the same as King Billy the Sleaze I.

Why do people like you claim Gore will stop at nothing,
when your side is doing all the cheating and vote-fixing?

Thats not what this country should be put through for another four years.
By the way, did you serve in the military?  I didn't think so ...

No, and I was never AWOL, either.
You see, I had this giant, 40-pound infected cyst on my ass..
Whoops, sorry, that was Rush Limba that had the giant cyst.

ha ha

Maybe I didn't serve, but I support our boys in uniform,
which is more than that vulgar Pigboy can say.

This web page is making Rush look like Knight in Shining Armor ...


I appreciate you reading  bartcop.com  every day.

 Tons of mail and 'toons

 Click  Here

From:  jbhigdon@townsend.com

Subject:        Ballots


Now, let me get this straight.  When the good citizens of West Palm beach
were confused because the instructions on their ballots were WRONG,
causing them to either over or under vote, their ballots are thrown out
because those good people are just too dumb to live.  But when military
personnel fail to fill out a STANDARD absentee ballot correctly (and in
many cases, had sections filled out for them in advance), by failing to
sign, or supply an identification number, and have their ballots thrown
out, it's that evil Algore attempting to steal the election.

This sounds like "REPUBLICAN SPEAK" to me.

I have a suggestion.  Lets have the 1400 military personnel re-file their
votes, and the 30,000 West Palm Beach voters do the same.
Seems like an equitable solution.  I don't want to see any vote go uncounted.
Can the Bush team say the same?

James B. Higdon

 This Hurts

               Chris Rock's Last Show - Tomorrow Night

                    NEW YORK – Chris Rock is wrapping up the four-year run of his Emmy-winning
                    HBO late-night talk show with Friday's season finale, HBO confirmed Tuesday.

                    HBO's president of original programming, Chris Albrecht, said in a written
                    statement that Mr. Rock had a great run with The Chris Rock Show,
                    which earned four consecutive Emmy nominations for best variety or
                    musical series since its premiere in 1997.

                    Mr. Rock and his writing team won the Emmy last year for writing for a
                    variety or musical series. Guests set for Friday's final installment include
                    rapper-actor Ice-T and singer Nikka Costa.

                    Although he is signing off as host of a regular HBO series, Mr. Rock is sure to
                    maintain a high profile on the pay-TV network. His most recent HBO comedy special,
                    1999's Chris Rock: Bigger and Blacker, also yielded an Emmy nomination.

                    Mr. Rock "is one of the biggest stars out there, and we continue to remain
                    in business with him and his concert specials," Mr. Albrecht said.

                    Indeed, Mr. Rock has become one of filmdom's most sought-after comedians since
                    his career took off with his 1990-93 run on Saturday Night Live. When he hosted the
                    1999 MTV Video Music Awards, the telecast set the network's all-time ratings record
                    with more than 8 million households tuning in.

From:  kishrandy@hotmail.com

Subject:  G. Liddy said....

I swear to god the "G-Man" is fucking out of this world.
He said, while on "The Edge" with whoever that stupid idiot woman
was Monday night, that in Florida people were "eating chads"!!!

That's right!
Just like a Democrat to manufacture votes, skew an election,
ignore the laws of the land, and do anything top get a free meal!
Fuckin' LIBERALS!!

It doesn't get any better than G. Liddy!


 Today's Page Two Girl has a face

 Click  Here

From: Cunningham@Hdnet.k12.mo.us

Subject: What about telling the truth?

I took just a few short minutes to look at you sight.
Found it with a Rush Limbaugh search.
Your whit is just to much.

Good luck

Jon R Cunningham

Your address tells me you're a teacher.
Hopefully, you teach math, not spelling or English.

 Great Smirky Quotes

"The legislature's job is to write the law,
  the executive branch's job is to interpret it."
      -George DubYa shows why he doesn't teach Government

  Thanks to voltai29@geocities.com

From: suzeli@erols.com

Subject: Mayor Daley's "Theft"


Next time PigBoy or one of his ditto sheep tells you how Bill Daley's dad "stole" the
1960 election for JFK, point out to him that even without Illinois' 27 electoral votes,
Kennedy would still have had 276, a bigger Electoral College majority than Smirk
will have even after he succeeds in stealing Florida.  And never mind that Nixon's
hands were none too clean in Southern Illinois balloting.

For the math-challenged,

  303 (JFK)
 - 27 (Illinois)
= 276 Electoral votes


 Phoebe Cates says,

 Don't get behind...

 Read  bartcop.com  every day!


 Samuel L Jackson is one of my favorite actors.
 I first saw him in Pulp Fiction and he won my heart.
 The restaurant hold-up scene was one of the best pieces of film work
 I've ever seen, and I don't know another actor who could've pulled it off.

 So we've been seeing those ads for Unbreakable starring Sam and Bruce Willis.
 By the way, my review of Unbreakable has nothing to do with Bruce's shitty politics.

 This new film was directed by that M Shangalang fellow, the guy who did Sixth Sense.
 I had major problems with Sixth Sense. Read my review of that film.

 Oh, by the way, don't read this if you want to see Unbreakable completely clean.
 I won't give away much, but if you've seen the previews, you already know that
 Bruce has never been sick - or hurt.

 The problems I have with Unbreakable are the same as with Sixth Sense.
 Bruce is Superman - but he doesn't know it?
 How stupidly impossible is that?

 He has nearly super-human strength, but didn't find out till he was 45?
 That's too stupid for anyone to buy.
 Also, if he touches a person, he can read their mind.

 How does that talent stay hidden for 45 years?
 And here's the big one - he's never been sick, never gotten hurt.
 You'd think, as a kid, when he fell off his bike, he'd say,
 "I'll be damned, my knees and elbows aren't bleeding - I wonder why."

 Like everything else, he's to goddamn stupid to realize this.
 The script has more holes than Smirk's tax plans.
 Bruce calls his boss to inquire how many sick days he's taken.
 The answer is zero.

 Why did he need to ask his boss if the answer is zero?
 If you were sick 6 or 8 times, it makes sense, but if he has no memory of ever
 calling the boss to say, "I'm sick today," maybe it's because he never made that call.

 Remember, the problem with Sixth Sense was that, if Bruce has really been dead
 for a year, how dense could he be to not have anyone talk to him for a year?
 In that year, he never took off his coat and saw the blood on his back?
 He didn't eat for a year? He didn't have sex for a year? Or use the bathroom for a year?

 Same problem with this stupid, stupid movie.
 Oh, and there's a "shock" at the end of the movie that's a 1 on the scale of big shocks.
 Also, the movie is directed and edited like a third-grader did it.
 Looooooong, lingering shots of absolutely nothing.
 You figure there's some hidden meaning if the director's going to hold a shot for
 30 seconds, but there's never anything there on the 31st second.

 There's a scene where Sam Jackson goes catatonic for 5 minutes.
 The store clerk keeps asking, "Are you OK? Should I call someone?"
 After five looooooooong minutes, Sam starts talking again, but there's no explanation
 why he blacked out for those five minutes. Stupid writing, stupid directing.

 Willis and Jackson acted OK, but what horrible parts they had.
 I've got a pretty low opinion of my writing, but I can write better than M Shangalang.
 Oh, another stupid thing M did, was he spends the first 90 looooooong minutes
 explaning how Bruce doesn't get along with his wife.
 THEN, Bruce discovers his powers.

 It would've been a lot better movie of they simply made the point that he was distant
 from his wife, THEN get to the super powers, which is where the movie is, you nit-witt!

 Jesus Christ, he's 45 and just discovered he has super-strength?
 He mentions moving from the apartment into their house five years ago.
 Trust me, when you move that couch and that refrigerator, you'll know if
 you've got the strength of ten men, Mr Shangalang.

 To make things worse, right after the movie I read the K-Drag paper's review.
 It couldn't heap enough praise on this stupid, stupid film.
 "You can't wait to see it again," the reviewer wrote.

 Thank Koresh I read the review in USA TODAY.
 That guy saw the same movie I saw.
 He said "You don't need Haley Joel Osment's character to see the dead grosses
 after word of mouth gets out about this dog of a movie."

 If you've seen this movie, I'd like to read/print your review.
 If you saw anything to like in this movie, write me for sure.

 VCR Alert -West Wing
 I thought last night's West Wing was one of their best shows ever.
 Only this season's premier was better, and maybe last year's Arlington episode.
 West Wing is better than most movies I shell out the 7 dollars for.
 Speaking of movies, I saw the new Bruce Willis/Sam Jackson movie.
 You might want to read my review before you spend your money.

 Last night's West Wing - co-produced by Patrick Caddell.
 Is this the same Pat Judas Caddell who hates Democrats with all his heart?
 Produced by Lawrence O'Donnell.
 Is this the same Lawrence O'Donnell from the McLaughlin Group?
 At least he's partly sane.
 Story by Pat Caddell - that makes me sick.
 Directed by Laura Innes, the doctor with the cane on ER.
 Are these real names or are they just f-ing with us?

 If you saw the show last night, you might enjoy hearing these clips again.
 For those of you in other countries, this is the best TV show we have.

 Here's some clips:

 Clip One - a boatload of Chinese is asking for asylum on religious grounds.

 Click  Here

 Clip Two - Leo, (Chief of Staff) tells his controversial sister to withdraw her name
 from consideration for a job.

 Click  Here

 Clip Three - The Chinese representative takes his religious test.
 The only thing missing from this scene was Groucho's duck.
 ...and I forgot Jesus had a disciple named Bart!

 Click  Here

 Clip Four - The whole show, the president has had Charlie, his personal assistant,
 auditioning carving knives. Charlie has been presenting the finest cutlery in the world
 to the never-satisfied president. This was the touching part of the show.

 Click  Here

 Clip Five - This was the funniest part of a great, well-rounded episode.

 Click  Here

This Just In...

 Dick Cheney has not had any heart attacks so far today.

 How Pigboy got in bed with ABC

 Click  Here

 VCR Alert

 I have the storu somewhere in the giant stack, but The Sopranos is returning.
 Starting December 4th, with is just around the corner, HBO is running every
 Sopranos episode, in order. They're wisely starting with Season One.
 After they run thru Season One, which was a f-ing monster of brilliance,
 they're doing Season Two. The week after Season Two is over, they're
 premiering Season Three, the new episodes.

 My opinion isn't worth any more than someone else's opinion, but if you're
 wondering why everybody is so worked up about how great The Sopranos is,
 catch the show from the very beginning starting in two weeks.

 There's a contest between West Wing and The Sopranos for best damn show ever.
 Even if you're determined not to like this show, it'll make you like it.

 Molly Ivins on the GOP's Big Mess

 Click  Here

 Smokin' Joe Conason Explains it All

 Click  Here

From: csiii@sound.net

Subject: Faithfully interpret

Truly scary thought:

"I do solemnly swear that I will faithfully interpret the office of President of the United States,
and will, to the best of my ability, preserve, protect, and defend the Constitution of the United states.
So help me Condi, Jim and Colin."

Steve Fuller

From: Tamara Baker

Subject: Florida GOP Lege threat (mostly hot air)

The Florida GOP needs 2/3 of each House in order to push through a vote
trashing the EVs for the state.  They are short 3 members in each House.

In other words, it ain't gonna happen, and they know it.


Starbucks in the Forbidden City

Click  Here

 Tally Briggs - Actress at Large

 Click  Here

 I've had a request to publish the confusing ballot.

Smokin' Joe Conason Explains even more

Click  Here

From: (withheld)

Subject: Election "Officials"

Dear BC,

I have worked in and managed political campaigns for over 30 years.
Therefore, I have considerable experience working with “election officials”
like the ones in Miami-Dade County.  Some election officials are dedicated,
hard working people.  Many are volunteers.  However, keep in mind that
the paid election officials, like the ones in Miami-Dade County, actually work
about four months every two years (two months preparing for the election,
two months after the election certifying results, storing voting machines, etc.)

The rest of the time (unless there is a special election), they set on their fat asses.
Therefore, in many places (Miami-Dade County) we have lazy, good for nothing
bureaucrats sucking at the government teat, waiting for an election.  What has
happened in Miami-Dade County is this:  A group of do nothing bureaucrats
(some Democrats are lazy too) who can’t be bothered to work the necessary
hours to get the votes counted, and rightfully elect Al Gore president.

The Miami-Dade County election officials have been dragging their feet on a recount
since the day after the election.  A recount is long hours and hard work, and they
simply don’t want to put forth the effort.  They are a disgrace to the political process,
and should be removed from the government teat. We would probably have been
better off if they had opened the door and let the rioting ditto heads have them.


I know you're right, but it's still hard to believe.
These people have history in their hands - the fate of the world's future - and all
they can think about is getting their long weekend so they can eat turkey.

Human nature is a real bitch.

Last week, Monday Night Football was 4th in the ratings.
The week before, it was 8th.

Does that mean Dennis Miller has been accepted?
They hired him to boost the sagging ratings, right?
With Millionaire and ER on TV, they're not going to get much higher than 4th.

...and they have to be tuning in for Dennis Miller, right?
Al Michaels has always been there, and I like Dan Fouts,
but nobody's going to tune in to hear what Dan Fouts has to say, right?

Good for you, Dennis.

 Read the  Previous Issue
 It was so good, we sent it to the Academy.

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