Subject: The Faith of Our Fathers...(and they can keep it...)
"If there is a God, I think it's an insult to Him to blindly and
follow whatever religion your parents have. All religion is geography-based. "
I was born and reared in Georgia.
I grew up Southern Baptist.
I'm now a Witch.
My parents are thrilled.
Almost as much as when I introduced them to my lesbian lover.
Make her stop!
I know you won't believe this,
but I think one of life's biggest thrills is being proven wrong.
I wish I could feel that thrill more often...
Thanks for a great kickoff to 2001.
PS. You gotta write some more.
That was goddamn well-played.
It's tough to sneak up on Ol' BartCop,
and you snuck up like a hungry Comanche.
From: (unsure - paraphrase)
Subject: BCS Wednesday Night Championship game fumble
if Florida State fumbles in the 4th quarter Wednesday,
enabling OU to win the national championship,
would that fumble turn you into a believer?
It's certainly possible, (the fumble, not me turning)
Y'know, I like Molly's writings, but she's never been a Clinton
and she didn't vote for Gore, and she takes a lot of cheap shots at Clinton
such as the title of this piece, "Clinton managed to accomplish a few things."
"managed to accomplish a few things?"
Jesus, Molly, if I'm ever in trouble, don't defend me, please!
Plus, she doesn't return ANY e-mails.
I don't make any claims to be some great writer, but I can damn sure write an e-mail
that's sure to get a response, but I guess Molly has been "too busy" the last 4-5 years
to bother answering some mail from people who really like her work..
But, to be fair, NOBODY answers their mail, except Joe Conason.
Shot of Chinaco for Joe Conason.
Tally Briggs / Actress at Large
Saw this on a Newsgroup...
The Official George W. Bush Inaugural Song
(Sung to the tune of the BEVERLY HILLBILLIES theme song)
Come and listen to my story 'bout a boy name Bush.
His IQ was zero and his head was up his tush.
He drank like a fish while he drove all about.
But that didn't matter 'cuz his daddy bailed him out.
DUI, that is. Criminal record. Cover-up.
Well, the first thing you know little Georgie goes to Yale.
He can't spell his name but they never let him fail.
He spends all his time hangin' out with student folk.
And that's when he learns how to snort a line of coke.
Blow, that is. White gold. Nose candy.
The next thing you know there's a war in Vietnam.
Kin folks say, "George, stay at home with Mom."
Let the common people get maimed and scarred.
We'll buy you a spot in the Texas Air Guard.
Cushy, that is. Country clubs. Nose candy.
Twenty years later George gets a little bored.
He trades in the booze, says that Jesus is his Lord.
He said, "Now the White House is the place I wanna be."
So he called his daddy's friends and they called the GOP.
Gun owners, that is. Falwell. Jesse Helms.
Come November 7, the election ran late.
Kin folks said "Jeb, give the boy your state!"
"Don't let those colored folks get into the polls."
So they put up barricades so they couldn't punch their holes.
Chads, that is. Duval County. Miami-Dade.
Before the votes were counted five Supremes stepped in.
Told all the voters "Hey, we want George to win."
"Stop counting votes!" was their solemn invocation.
And that's how George finally got his coronation.
Rigged, that is. Illegitimate. No moral authority.
Y'all come vote, now. Ya hear?
Subject: FUCKING STUPID!!
YOU ARE ALL SOOOO FUCKING STUPID.
YOU ARE MISGUIDED FOOLS.
I REALLY FEEL SORRY FOR YOU.
I COULDN'T THINK OF A BETTER WAY TO WASTE WEB
YOU ARE ALL A WASTE OF TIME AND FLESH!!
I CAN'T BELIVE GOD LETS YOU LIVE.
FOR YOUR SAKE I HOPE YOU DON'T SUFFER IN YOUR EXISTENCE
TOO MUCH LONGER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
How Will History Judge the Whore Court?
Jackson To Campaign Against Ashcroft
At least there's one fighter in Washington...
Hey BartCop Dude:
Do you think you might be a Deist in the same vein as Ben Franklin and Thomas Jefferson?
Huey, I don't know their views on a deity, so I can't say.
I only know what I know.
If there is a God, I think it's an insult to Him to blindly and sheepishly
follow whatever religion your parents have.
All religion is geography-based.
If you're born in Africa, you may have a bone in your nose and a plate
in your lips,
and you'll worship whatever God your parents worship.
If you're born in Iran, you'll worship Ayatollah Khomenie and call America
"the Great Satan."
If you're born in China, you'll worship Buddha.
If you're born in India or Pakistan, your religion tells you it's OK to pour kerosene on your
wife and light her because her family came up short on the dowry.
If you're born in Missouri, like John Ashcroft, you feel it's your duty to engage in
the Great Cock Hunt and you'll pursue that goal with all your might.
Religion is a roulette wheel, and if that's the best system God could
come up with,
how did he get to be God in the first place?
Subject: THANK THE POWERS THAT BE FOR YOU
I love your site and It's about time we hear some straight talk!!
I'm so damn tired of my party people, (Dems) in Washington trying to play nicey nice and
ask us to rally around the little Nazi Klan from Texas that I could puke!! I have been infuriated
all through this fiasco called an election to not see our people get out there and raise hell!!!
I wrote, I called I faxed and I wore the fingerprints off of my damn
fingers trying to get these
goddamn jerks to stand up and fight for us!!! I turn on the TV and what do I see from our party?
I see quiet talkers, meek talkers, almost apologetic talkers, when they as well as we watched
the freaking election stolen right under our damn noses!!
I'm new to this political world and only got involved when the whole
impeachment debacle came down.
I want you to know that I am now not only in shock, but I'm outraged!! We need people like YOU
on the airwaves.. we need people like YOU on the talk shows!!
Am I mad you ask?.. you bet your ass I'm mad!! I will be going to the
protest in Washington on Jan. 20th
to have my voice heard. It won't stop little Hitler from taking the throne but he will know, that we know
what he did!! He will also know that many.. many ..many of us will never call him president!!
Is it really New Year's Eve?
This is the dullest New Year's Eve in memory.
Probably because of last year's overkill, but I haven't seen many TV promos
for Dick Clark, I haven't read much in the papers beyond the "Best/worst" lists.
Is anybody doing anything tonight?
Maybe we should chat or something later???
Subject: talk about smirking...
Bill Clinton, your apparent hero, has the most
shit-eating smirk I've ever seen.
When people die, he's smirking; when tragedy strikes, he's there smirking like crazy;
when he's caught in a lie, there's the smirk!
you guys sure are big jerks....
Merry Christmas to you too, Marla
Subject: Christmas in NY
Yesterday we took in the Christmas show at Radio City.
Free tickets, 17th row center. The hall is amazing.
They have pipe organs on either side of the stage that move into the wall
when the show starts. The organists wear "diamond" soles on their shoes
to reflect lights as they do the pedals.
When the show starts, the orchestra rises up out of the floor in front
of the stage and then lowers down in front. The stage is big enough for
40 Rockettes to spin around in a line. The backdrops must be 60 ft high.
A Christmas tree comes out of the floor that must be 40 ft tall. The
basement must be huge. Later in the show, a turntable stage comes up. At
one point the orchestra riser comes up to stage level and then gets
pulled somehow to the back of the stage. Another riser comes out of the
front with a small skating rink on it.
I'm not much for dance, but it was good. Some dancers had to wear huge
costumes and I have no idea how they can jump around and hit the right spot
without being able to see. They even have 2 Camels and a number of sheep
roaming around at times. Another high point was the 50 or so Santa's dancing around.
Then a mirrored wall came up out the floor and doubled them.
Before the show, we had lunch at B.B. King's new club in Times Square.
It was early and we had the place to ourselves. They had a nice liquor rack,
including Chinaco, Goose and Ketel One. Nice quiet blues playing on the sound system.
Behind the bar they have musical instruments cut in pieces and nailed around a
picture of BB and Lucille.
I touched my snow shovel a number of times today. We got about a foot.
BTW, If you want to take a look at Times Square in the snow, go to www.weather.com
and try the NY webcam. Nice view. It should be good when the ball goes down.
Subject: Keep Dennis in your prayers?
Couldn't help but notice this phrase that someone
wrote to you:
"Keep Dennis in your prayers".
Too bad that's all horseshit to you.
(It's moot now, but it still applies to his mother.)
So is Dennis rotting in the ground now, or could
there be an afterlife or meaning to all this?
How many best friends will you have to lose before you consider that there might be
something more to life and consciousness than electrochemistry?
One of your famous statements is "you can believe
whatever insanity you want to,
but keep it out of the schools and the courthouse." I don't have a problem
with the second part of that statement, but I have a problem with the first.
I have a problem with calling anyone "insane"
who believes in something that isn't proven.
I have a problem with calling God a crutch for the weak-minded.
Maybe you wish that there was a God right now.
Maybe this is "more proof" that God couldn't exist.
But regardless, secular humanism gets more empty and hollow as you get older, huh?
You might respond that you only call certain specific
religious practices insane,
as in a few Catholic doctrines, but you also call Papax7 insane, who's probably Protestant.
I've also seen you claim that you can refute the notion of God's existence, and then
you turn around and call yourself agnostic!
Pointing out unsavory political deeds by the Christian
Coalition is one thing.
Laughing with disdain at the concept of religion is another.
I'm just hoping that in the future, you could
at least pretend that we billion Christians could be on to something.
Aw hell, this is probably just another of those misunderstandings.
You're the first good laugh I've had since the phone call.
"Rotting in the ground?"
Thanks for being so sensitive, Mr Religion.
Did you think you'd have a better shot of beating me by attacking me
Did you think I would abandon decades of clear-thinking in my grief?
I didn't ask anybody for prayers because I try not to be a hypocrite.
How many best friends will you have to lose before
you consider that there might be
something more to life and consciousness than electrochemistry?
That may be the stupidest thing anyone has ever
You think he died because I don't believe in ghosts?
Are you nuts?
Have you ever heard of logic or common sense?
Do you think if you step on a crack, you might break your mama's back?
Why should I reject reality when a friend dies?
Isn't this typical religio-think?
I've also seen you claim that you can refute the
notion of God's existence,
and then you turn around and call yourself agnostic!
The word "agnostic" comes from the Greek word agnOstos, which
I've got the brains and the courage to say "I don't know" and you attack me for that, too?
Gee, which one of us is an overwhelming ignoramus?
I understand that you are scared, and you've been convinced, by people
who want your money
that you can't make it without help from the invisible beings who float in the clouds above..
You keep on thinking that.
Besides pointing out the folly of it, I'll never try to take that from
What good would it do me to have a panicky ninny worrying all the time?
If Santa and the Tooth Fairy float your boat, I don't have a problem with that,
until your insanity affects those of us living in the world of science and logic.
Yes, I think all religion is a form of insanity.
I think people who claim they're better than others because their proud of their
particular brand of insanity proves my point, and I think your "timely" attack is
proof of how little your precious religion means to you.
Apparently, your religion has taught you to increase the hate when you
your "opponent" might be vulnerable, and you wonder why I won't join you?
In the 23 years I knew Dennis, I don't think he ever got angry.
I don't think he hated anyone, either, and he damn sure didn't attack others after they lost a friend.
No, that job belongs to Philip Hamer, my moral superior.
"Rotting in the ground?"
Look what your religion has done to your sense of decency...
H.M.O.'s to Drop Many Elderly and Disabled People
By Jo Thomas
Full Sad Story
SPRINGFIELD, Ohio — James Castle, a Medicare recipient and retired factory
with a bad heart, has been in three health maintenance organizations in the past three years.
His present one is dropping him as of Jan. 1.
The first, United Healthcare of Ohio, cut benefits, so he switched.
The second, Secure Horizons, left the state. His current one, Aetna U.S. Healthcare, will drop
all 52,330 Medicare H.M.O. beneficiaries in Ohio on Jan. 1, because "inadequate government
reimbursements have made operating a number of our Medicare H.M.O.'s no longer viable."
country except America takes care of the elderly medical.
Bill Clinton tried to fix that, and was cricified by the GOP and his fellow Democrats.
I keep seeing sarcastic "Thank you, Bill Clinton" stories in the paper because we had control
of the House and Senate until 1994 when the Democrat rats abandoned their president.
Now, the GOP
controls everything, and we can trace it all back to 1994 and Health Care.
As smart as they are, Bill and Hillary made that huge mistake of thinking the Democrats
would back them up when the going got tough. I laugh whenever I see Democrats complain
about Clinton distancing himself from them in 1995 with his triangulation strategy.
If Clinton had distanced himself from those cowards earlier, he might've been able to do
to Health Care what he did for the economy, but noooooooooooo.
How did I end up in a party of scared bunnies?
He thought his
party would hang with him, and he was dead fucking wrong, so they ended
hanging seperately and Clinton goes out with the highest modern approval rating ever.
It's enough to drive a man to drink.
Kevin Cunningham on Christmas morning...
Subject: Fan Mail
Just thought I'd drop you a line and tell you to keep up the good work,
especially in such
dark times right after the coup. I recently found your page in a way I couldn't explain now
if I had to, but it's been one of my better findings out there on the Internet. See, I'm an
18-year-old, and this was my first election. I'm also a registered Democrat in southwest
Wyoming, 80 miles from the center of Mormonism in Salt Lake City, Utah.
You can imagine, I'm sure, what it's like living in my state and being
I'm the pariah of my family now.
Fuck the "famous liberal bias" of the media. It is IMPOSSIBLE to find
any news that's
not negative about Clinton or Gore. I was sickened by the realization that the only reason
I knew that Bush was such a fucking scumbag was because I read everything I can on the
internet about politics, seeing as how it's the only way to find real news, especially living
where I live. Your page has been of great help to me. My dad's a strict Republican and
proud of it, and he keeps braying about how "if the situation was reversed I wouldn't care",
and how it doesn't matter that the will of the people has been utterly usurped.
It's nice to be able to have ammunition to fire back at him.
I'm sure you get a bunch of email like this a day, so I won't waste
any more of your time
than I already have. But thanks a lot, keep up the good work, and don't get discouraged.
Bush's Selections Widen Cabinet's Role
By Joseph Kahn
WASHINGTON, Dec. 29 -- George W. Bush's choices for top posts in his administration
signal that he intends to run a government by cabinet, delegating more authority than usual to
seasoned executives whose reputations were made years before Mr. Bush first ran for office.
With their golden résumés, long years of public service,
strong personalities and close ties to
Bush, Cheney and the Republican establishment-in-waiting, the men and women of the emerging
cabinet can be expected to exert just as much influence over the administration as the staff in
the White House exerts, if not more.
Gosh, isn't it
convenient when Daddy has newspaper people on ther payroll?
Put more honestly, that first paragraph should read: Since he's a brainless moron with the
mental capacity of an ADD sixth grader, Bush must rely more than ever on the brains
of the hired help. He is expected to do whatever his handlers tell him the next 4 years.
What kills me,
is we KNEW he was an idiot before election day.
Gore lost to a brainless fool with a criminal record and no experience.
...where's my damn tequila?
I saw this on the Oklahoma Demolist e-group
Dennis Clark has posted many excellent messages
on the DemoList,
often using the name, SABUTAI. I once asked him about that name.
Here is his answer:
The shortened version of the name "Sabutai". Sabutai was the
first follower of Ghengis Khan. He joined up with him when they
were young teens close to 14 or 15. He became one of Ghengis' most
trusted Generals and was married to one of Ghengis' daughters.
He could be a very ruthless man, laying waste to many towns and
cities during campaigns in China and Eastern Asia, but also if
they agreed to join the Mongols he would accept them like brothers.
Even to the point of marrying some of them into his family.
It was the take no prisoners kind of battles that led me to the
name. I feel the same way about Republicans. Take no Prisoners!
Dennis attached great quotations to most of his e-messages.
Here is one that I picked at random from his messages I have saved:
"Fundamentalist Christian: One who believes that the New Testament
a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor.
-- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Sabutai, this one is for you.
Let us TAKE NO PRISONERS in 2002 and 2004.
How a President Who Promised
to Unify a Nation Fixed an Election
The Five Worst Republican Outrages by Wayne Barrett
Subject: Flag Burning is Patriotic
There are many people who will be offended by those who are going to
flag the moment that Bush is sworn in as president. And they should be offended,
after all, that is the idea of a protest, to offend people and get attention.
But flag burning is a duty of patriotic people who love this country to speak
out against the installation of a president who was not elected by the people.
Our country was founded by flag burners who stood up against the injustices
the King of England and who fought and gave their lives to form a government
of the people who’s sole purpose of existence is to serve the people. And it
is ultimately the responsibility of the people to protect and defend those freedoms
both from external enemies and those of us who would take away those freedoms
and liberties for the benefit of self interested political gain.
Our soldiers didn’t fight and die to protect the flag. They fought and
protect the people’s right to burn the flag. The burning of the flag is the ultimate
symbol of the people asserting their dominance over the government. Let us therefore
honor those who would now stand for our freedoms and liberties and who love America
enough to burn the flag this 20th day of January.
Guess who won Creep of the Year?
Read the Previous
It was a whole different kind of issue.
Copyright © 2000 bartcop.com
Go Home to bartcop.com