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Volume 1099 - Sins of the Son

Click to visit our new sponsor - WorriedShrimp.com

Wed-Thurs   June 25-26, 2003 


"They keep calling  Hillary a radical feminist, which means what?  She has a job?
  Hey, Laura Bush had a job too, but she quit it to stay home and raise her husband.
     -- Will Durst

 EU Calls Smirk a big fat liar 

  Click  Here

 Europe shot back at Washington on Tuesday in their war over genetically modified food, accusing Dim Son
 of falsehoods about EU restrictions on the eve of a summit meant to ease transatlantic tensions.

 The European Commission rejected Bush's accusation on Monday that the European Union's unofficial ban on GM
 food aggravated the risk of famine in Africa, and said the EU did far more than the United States to feed the world's poor.

"The suggestions made by the United States are simply not true,'' Commission spokesman Gerassimos Thomas told a daily news briefing.

"Have that son of a bitch killed - and then burn his house down."

 Mega-Dueling Quotes

"Right now, Iraq is expanding and improving facilities that were used for the production of biological weapons."
      --President Liar   Speech to UN, 9/12/02

"Our intelligence officials estimate that Saddam Hussein had the materials to produce
  as much as 500 tons of sarin, mustard and VX nerve agent."
      --President Liar   SoTU Speech 1/28/03

"We have heard a lot about revisionist history from the White House of late in answer to those who
  question whether there was a real threat from Iraq. But it is the President who appears to me to be
  intent on revising history. But, it is the President who appears to me to be intent on revising history.
  There is an abundance of clear and unmistakable evidence that the Administration sought to portray
  Iraq as a direct and deadly threat to the American people.  But there is a great difference between
  the hand-picked intelligence that was presented by the Administration to Congress and the American
  people when compared against what we have actually discovered in Iraq.  This Congress and the people
  who sent us here are entitled to an explanation from the Administration."
      --Sen Robert C. Byrd,   The Road to Coverup Is the Road to Ruin

 Bush's Willing Executioners: America Betrayed by Cowardly Citizens
   by Ted Rall

  Click  Here

 As George W. Bush's aristocorporate junta runs roughshod over hard-earned freedoms, as his lunatic-right
 Administration loots $10 trillion from the national treasury, as his armies invade sovereign nations without cause,
 as he threatens war against imagined enemies while allowing real ones to build nuclear weapons, those charged
 with standing against these perversions of American values remain appallingly, inexplicably silent.

 We have become a nation of cowards, and I am ashamed.
 Where are the Democrats?

 They're hiding under a table, shaking like bunnies at the thought of Mr Rove being disappointed.

 Subject: Bone head on CNN

 Bart, this WW2 combat vet could have Glocked my Dish network TV this afternoon.

 Watching tennis and using the remote to see the bull shit when they go to commercials,
 I clik on the shit channel "CNN News" And this bald headed ahole with glasses came
 on the political segment with Judy Woodruff " MWHOL".

 Now this creep had the gall to say that " Bush is a war Hero" this made me so friggin mad
 that this bastard compared heroism to this two bit S.O.B. AWOL deserter,  to the guys
 that we buried at sea. Shame on CNN !!

 Bart thanks for your call and the stickers.

 John B.

 John, I'm with you, Dude.

 Shot of Chinaco for you real heroes.

 Vanessa Marcil stars in 'Las Vegas,' this fall?

 James Caan stars in this one-hour drama as the head of an elite
 surveillance team that oversees the security of one of the largest
 casinos in Las Vegas. From the writer of the film The Fast and
 the Furious, the series co-stars Josh Duhamel, Molly Sims,
 Nikki Cox, James Lesure, Nessa Holt and Vanessa Marcil.

 I'd watch that show.
 Hell, I'd watch a show that was about Vanessa Marcil watching TV

 How bad would this show have to be for me to dislike it?

 Sources: U.S. planned to kill bin Laden before 9/11

  Click  Here

"When President Bush took office in January 2001, the White House was told that Predator drones had recently
  spotted Osama as many as three times and officials were urged to arm the unmanned planes with missiles to kill him.
  But the administration failed to get drones back into the Afghan skies until after the September 11 attacks later that year,
  current and former U.S. officials say...

 Defense officials suggested they be given an objective -- kill bin Laden -- and be left to make their own decisions about
 whether to use a drone or other weapons like cruise missiles and B-1 bombers, officials said. Targeting bin Laden was
 legally permitted under secret orders and presidential findings that Clinton had signed.

 Officials at the September 4 meeting put off recommending the armed drone as a solution. Instead, they finalized a series
 of other measures to rout al Qaeda from its base in Afghanistan, including re-arming the rebel Northern Alliance.
 Those recommendations were being forwarded from Rice to Bush when the September 11 hijackers struck, officials said."

 Remember, Bush took the month off before the 9-11 attacks.
 Maybe if he had been working instead of talking to the damn cows,
 he might've been as effective as Bill Clinton was at stopping terrorism.
 But then, he wouldn't have gotten the power he's got now, would he?

 His old friend Osama gave George something Daddy couldn't - high approval ratings.
 America rewarded the Unelected Monkey with her heart - and he's a greedy, lazy screw-up.

 Here’s a translation of an article that appears in Le Matin:  A Swiss French language paper from a firm
 reporting to the five Swiss cantons (states) that are ‘Francophone.’ (includes Geneva, where I work)

 Other than the petroleum, the United States isn’t occupying anything in Iraq.

 “The Americans encouraged us to plunder”
         by Ian Hamel  in Baghdad

 Not only did our taxi driver drive a stolen car, its windshield crinkled from bullet shots, but he burned
 the red lights, and didn’t respect the one-way direction through the traffic circle. Laughing, about 30 GIs,
 their weapons in hand, contemplated the huge disorder that has taken over Baghdad (5 million inhabitants)
 since the fall of Saddam Hussein.

 Autoroute traffic sets the image for the entire country. No longer does anything function correctly.  Administrative
 centers were plundered, archives were burned, communications networks damaged.  Worse, the occupying forces
 don’t focus on this.  "They listen to us, respond very politely, and affirm that they were going to refer the matters to
 their superiors."  says the head of an NGO.  But then nothing ever happens.  Because of that attitude, the psychiatric
 hospital, which was taken over by the International Red Cross), had been pilfered three times.

The “Thieves’ Markets”

 Must the hospital be restocked in medications, beds, medical equipment, if the American army gives no assurance
 that they will finally ensure that it stays guarded?  Clearly, can one count on the United States to reestablish order?
 Within the multiple ‘Thieves’ Markets’ in Baghdad, the sellers flip their fingers at the Americans.  "It’s they, that
 opened the doors to the Ministries, and encouraged us to carry it all away." they recounted.


 And, of course, you'd never see this story on the nightly news,
 because they're covering up Bush's bungles to prop up the illegal fraud.

 At  alexas.com  bartcop.com  was given four stars out of five.

 Is that anything?

 I didn't send them any money...

Click  Here

Please visit our sponsors

 Rolling Stone readers vote U2 is the best live band (in recent years)

  Click  Here

 Somewhere in the late eighties, the E Street Band took a break, and U2 became the best live band in the world.
 They'll do whatever it takes to connect: jump into a stadium crowd and slow-dance with a fan, as Bono did at
 Live Aid in 1985; take a gospel choir on the road (Joshua Tree tour, 1987); overwhelm audiences with
 multimedia (ZooTV Tour, 1992); or just play uplifting rock & roll with a lot of feeling (every tour).

 I was lucky enough to see U2 in '87, '92, '97 and '02.
 For a group without a chick singer, they are the best live band.

 VCR Alert - I think it's called the World Poker Tour

 This is gambling.
 Having lived as a gambler for about 5 years, it's in my blood, and this is so much cheaper.
 TONIGHT, 9PM CST on the Travel Channel (of all places) they're doing the grand finale of
 The Road to the World Poker Tour. (Maybe that's the travel tie-in)

 This is the BIG one.
 For weeks, they've been doing elimination tourneys in different cities.

 This is REAL poker, for real money.
 First they deal two cards, face down.
 The players look - the players bet.
 Sometimes, a guy looks at a pair of Kings and he suddenly blurts out, "All in!"

 Damn, this is exciting.
 One guy looks at his cards, and bets, say, $160,000.

 ha ha

 I don't know where you live, but in Tulsa, that's three nice houses.
 This is REAL poker, for real money.

 Crazier still, they award the prize in cash.
 The winner gets $3,000,000 - in cash.
 I assume he can take a check instead, but this is Vegas - the cash IS on the table.

 If you only watch one poker tournament this year, watch this one!

 The TV viewer gets to see everyone's cards - live.
 It's strange to watch a man with a shit hand push $200,000 in the pot,
 while the viewer knows the guy to his left has a full house.

 Seriously, this show has given me poker fever.
 We gotta figure a way to play some friendly online poker.
 No house, just 5-6 of us playing some friendly poker online.
 Who has the software for that?

 Tonight - 9 PM CST   the World Poker Tour    on the Travel Channel

 Subject: I can't believe he said that!

 I thank God almost every DAY that I'm not on active duty anymore,
 what with commanders tellin the press we're expendable.

 This guy has to be even dumber than Dumbya, and that's saying something.
 If I were overheard saying something like that by, say, my sergeant major,
 he would have handed me my ass.

 Print this or not, but this guy Odierno is an asshole.


 I hate to agree with right-winger (and former funnyman) Kelsey Grammer,
 but he's right when he says Spike Lee is crazy to sue Spike TV for stealing his name.

 There were lotsa Spikes looooooong before Mr Lee came around.
 I'm too young to remember these guys (How often do I get to say that?)
 but the Katzenjammer Kids (sp?) had a Spike, I think.

 Why does Spike think he can copyright a noun and a verb?

 What what that golden thing they used to join two railroad tracks in western Utah in the 1860s?
 Is Spike, like, 150 years old?
 What's next, I can't be BartCop because Bart Simpson went on the air in 1989?

 When I was a really little kid, I read an old-time Superman comic book.
 It was the one where Lex Luthor copyrighted the alphabet, and anytime
 anyone said or wrote anything, they owed Lex Luthor a dollar.

 I'm maybe seven or eight reading this, and I remember thinking, "Oh, please!
 Give me a jury and 15 minutes and I'll smack this fool so hard he'd be afraid of courtrooms."

 So, forty years later, Spike tries to copyright the noun and the verb, "spike."
 One skit asked, "Let's put some alcohol in the punch and, ...and, ...and, ...mix in the alcohol."

 Spike, not everything is about you, Dude.

This is the "fence" that Israel is building.
I wonder why they refuse to call this wall a wall?


"The Bush Administration, which never met a fact it couldn't embellish, or, in the absence of supporting facts,
  simply invent. Lying about, well, virtually everything is a staple of politicians, but the Bush cabal has taken it
  to a new level of bald misstatement. And as we're seeing with the phantom weapons of mass destruction, this
  crowd responds to inconvenient realities like a five-year-old confronted with the non-existence of the Easter Bunny.
  "Does not," the world explained. "Does so!," the White House spokesman exclaimed…"
    --Geov Parrish, Eying lies

 Hammer Building

 In a scandalously greedy manner, let me mention another reason to become a member

 Say, on a Wednesday, subscribers can read the first drafts of Thursday's issue.
 This is the "work in progress" before it gets all polished and intelligent (cough!)

 You see the writing that's off the record.
 It "doesn't count" until it's posted on the free page the next day.
 Sometimes I write something, and I think, "Did I go too far? Will they get the irony?"
 and I might call Christian or Tommy Mack or Reef the Dog and get a second opinion.

 Other benefits -  you can read the early edition and if you spot a mistake or an error, (fat chance)
 you could e-mail me and we'd make the page smarter up-front, with less 'bartcop.com regrets the error.'

 Plus, I might be able to get subscribers invited to the supermodel convention in September.
 Only current members will be eligible to meet and have sex with the gorgeous supermodels.

 With which supermodel would you most enjoy having sex?

 Subscribe Here

 Plus - there's that whole radio thing, which is still in the 'sucks' stage, but it's getting better.
           I have Part 2 of Show 5 ready in the tube and ready to fire.

 Attack Iran Now!



"We said loud and clear [to corporate scoundrels], if you cheat the shareholder and your employees,
   you will be held responsible for those decisions. The world is now more peaceful because we acted."
     -- President Liar, Minnesota, Jun. 19, 2003

 No you didn't,
 You winked at let them know this White House was pro-business.

 Sure, you got that dangerous Martha Stewart ($46K) off the streets, but why is Kennyboy,
 who stole hundreds of millions, still sipping Mai Tai's at the whites only country clubs?

 Because you cracked down on him?

 The Inside Story on the Carlyle Group
   Buzzflash interviews author Dan Briody    "Inside the Carlyle Group"

  Click  Here

 BuzzFlash: Perhaps this is more of a comment, but we found it not-so-curious that after the
 controversial visit of Bush to the U.S.S. Lincoln in the flight suit, that he returned to California
 from 30 miles offshore and gave a speech at, of all places, the United Defense plant. Do you
 have any thoughts there about the fact the President of the United States is speaking at a plant
 that is 50% owned by a company that his father is a consultant with?

 Dan Briody: I think it's brazen, and I think it's shameless. And I think that that will go down as
 a hallmark of this administration. We have seen an absolute affinity for mixing business and politics,
 and throw in a war and you've got the Bush administration. And that scene of him giving that speech
 at United Defense's plant in Santa Clara summed up perfectly what this administration is all about.

 I screwed this up yesterday, so here it is with a working link

 Subject: Bartcop radio


 What's the deal with Bartcop radio?

 If the only people that can listen are paid subscribers,
 isn't that like preaching to the choir?


 ha ha

 I find myself at a disadvantage...

 No Dude, the 'deal' is, I no longer have a job.
 I left my very low-paying job in February to gamble on this 
Wait, I did what?  I quit a low-paying, do-nothing job in the BUSH administration?

 Sure, it was like trading the family cow for some magic beans, but sometimes there
 really is magic in those beans.  I am pleased to report that we have more subscribers
 than I would've thought.  Once I get the radio thing into a regular rythym, I wouldn't be
 surprised if we doubled our subscribers before the end of the year.

 This might actually work, but only if I can deliver the goods over time.

 Yes, it would be a gamble to subscribe for 30 days.
 Or, you could wait a while, and I'll get better as time goes by!

 Howard Dean

 From the Boston Globe:

 Dean's record isn't radically left-leaning. He advocates a balanced federal budget.
 He is an abortion-rights advocate and opposes drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge,
 yet he received top ratings from the National Rifle Association and supports the death penalty
 in some cases, like terrorism or the killing of police officers or young children.

 Tim H

 They say Gore would've been president if not for the gun issue.

 Who won the first Emerging Journalist Award?

  Our very own Isaac Peterson!

  Click  Here

 Three men of different backgrounds and different eras will be honored for their work in the
 Black press at the National Association of Black Journalists (NABJ) 28th Annual Convention
 and Career Fair in Dallas, August 6-10, 2003.

 Peterson, a reporter at the Minnesota Spokesman-Recorder, wrote a series
 on the Minneapolis NAACP secrecy and complaints about its conduct and practices.
 He also penned another series on the expansion of I-35 W route and its community impact.

  Woo Hoo!

 Isaac got his start writing for  bartcop.com
 Almost immediately, he was scooped up by the Minnesota Spokesman-Recorder,
 and now he's been won an award for being an emerging journalist.

 From August 6-10, he'll be staying at the Dallas Hyatt Regency.

 If you're in the Dallas area, call Isaac at the Hyatt and but him a drink.
 I'll bet Issac would especially like to meet some female Dallas BartCoppers.

 In a similar but unrelated vein, Christian Livemore has been publishing the
 Effingham Herald almost by herself (with the help of the King of Israel and
 true ruler of not only Palestine, but now Oklahoma, too).

 In their recent history, they were limited to three Georgia Press Awards in a single year.
 Under Christian's stewardship, they recently won eight Georgia Press Awards

 Christian, herself won two awards (Features and Hard News) and she shared
 an award with the King of Israel for their report on the anniversary of 9-11.

 It seems  bartcop.com  is a hotbed of litterery excelence.

Click to Enter


"Unlike Saddam, Bush needn't cut out his opponents' tongues.
  They're keeping silent on their own.
    -- Ted Rall

                                      "But we can't speak up - Mr. Rove doesn't allow that kind of thing..."

 Burned Iraqi Children Turned Away

  Click Here

"On a scorching afternoon, while on duty at an Army airfield, Sgt. David J. Borell was approached
 by an Iraqi who pleaded for help for his three children, burned when they set fire to a bag containing
 explosive powder left over from the war.

 Borell immediately called for assistance. But the two Army doctors who arrived about an hour later refused
 to help the children because their injuries were not life-threatening and had not been inflicted by U.S. troops.

 Now the two girls and a boy are covered with scabs and the boy cannot use his right leg.
 And Borell is shattered.

"I have never seen in almost 14 years of Army experience anything that callous," said Borell,
 who recounted the June 13 incident to The Associated Press.

"Screw those kids. We have to save money to give my friends another tax cut."

Click to own

Marty's E! page
Ann Coulter is co-hosting 'The View' this morning (ewww).
Harper's Weekly Reveiew
'Stuff' from Alex
Lou Reed & Hollywood's Rockwalk
JFK was in Berlin 40 years ago
' Monk' set new records for USA network
Spike Jones, Jr., enters the TNN/Spike Lee fray
Comedy Central laid off 80 - it's called 'consolidadation'
Paula Zahn's hours trimmed at CNN
Eminem stunned a British audience
Diana Ross felt forced into a breathalizer test
Springsteen extends tour
And, Universal Studios are Steven Spielberg's personal cash cow.


 From:  ljbk

"Margaret Carlson has turned into a whining bitch", whose whines and lies COVER UP
 the massive damage being done to America's working families by the feudalist
 (scalia, cheney,  bush, ashcroft, etc.) who would turn America into a despotic autocracy

 I * DO * wish I could add something intelligent to express my disgust at how low
 the American press/media discourse has gone, but I will merely say that, short of
 Ann Coulter's murderous diatribes (and her freeper/dittohead/skinhead hater's chorus)
 Margaret Carlson's conversation with Chris Mathews was about as low and infantile
 as two adults discoursing on any subject could hope to go.

> "Hillary never aknowledges the incredibly reckless behavior of her husband.
>   She always portrays herself as the victim -- that the right is always mischaracterizing the Clintons."
    --Margaret Carlson, (R_Whining bitch)

 How the Left Can Get Its Groove Back
   by Danny Goldberg, former lawyer to Led Zeppelin, Swear to Koresh

  Click  Here

 If one were to dig down and read every detailed position paper of the Democrats,
 in many cases one would find that there were indeed significant differences from
 Republicans. For someone like me, who places importance on judicial appointments,
 and who closely follows the Senate debates, it was not difficult to root for a Democratic
 Senate. But it was not at all surprising to me that most voters who follow the popular
 media had no idea what Democrats stood for.

 If memory serves, Goldberg is famous for counting out nine thousand dollars to the manager of
 some swanky hotel that had lost 30 TVs out their upper-floor windows.  The way I remember it,
 the manager said, "No hard feelings, I'd kinda like to throw a TV out of the window, myself."

 Goldberg counted him out an extra $300 and said, "Be our guest."

 Can Bush Be Both Ignorant and a Liar?
 Yes. There's no reason to choose between the two

  Click  Here

 Let's address Bush's tax claim first. Its falsity is not in dispute. Chatterbox has written elsewhere
 that Bush lied when he said, "My jobs and growth plan would reduce tax rates for everyone who
 pays income tax." (The Urban Institute-Brookings Institution Tax Policy Center found 8.1 million
 people who pay taxes but will receive no tax cuts.) Rosenbaum recognized that Bush's statement
 was untrue but expressed doubt that Bush knew it to be untrue. Can a false statement be a lie if
 the speaker is unaware it is a lie?

 Wait, we're going to forgive his lies because he's so stupid?
 Stop this world - I want to get off.

 Subject: More Moose

 Moose's role as coordinator of the Sniper Task Force, its visible spokesperson, hardly would give him
 the ability to control the investigation, let alone slow it down.  Virginia had four jurisdictions involved.
 Our police in this death penalty state were pursuing the case most vigorously.  The FBI was involved
 in the investigation - and one of their own had been killed by the sniper.  Malvo himself spoke of a
 sniper hotline volunteer giving him the brush off early on.  Given these facts, your talk about Moose
 is misguided.  Wasn't your original point (way back) to expose the Limbaugh approach and  parody it,
 but not actually use it (except perhaps against members of the VRWC.)   After all, the Limbaugh
 approach is ugly, unfair, and distorting, isn't it?


 I have tried to use certain words when talking about Moose.
 I never said, "Moose is guilty."
 I said "I don't like the guy, he's a grandstander who looooooooooooves that spotlight
 AND he was in the position that, more dead people means more money in his pocket."
 I don't think people should be in that position. I assume that's why they have that rule Moose broke.

 Saying I'm using Rush tactics, that seems to indicate you see nothing wrong with a man being in the
"more dead = more money" position. Let's say, just for the argument, that Moose is the straightest
 arrow who ever lived - what about the next guy, and the next?  You'd better not dangle a fortune
 in front of a weak man, or people will certainly die.

 Would an evil man let innocent people die to become rich?
 Look at the White House, and then tell me we should always trust the government.

Fight back with BartCop Radio

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 Protesters Besiege Bush's NY Fundraiser 
  Must be from the UK - you won't hear about protestors from Bush's media

  Click  Here

"Tonight, President Bush will be surrounded by multi-millionaires who are able to pay for laws
 that allow them to avoid taxes, plunder our natural resources, ignore workers' basic health and
 safety needs, and dismantle public oversight of their actions," said Margie McHugh, director of
 the New York Immigration Coalition.

 Subject: Defending Hillary
 bartcop.com  reader gets letter in Philly Daily News

  Click  Here

 Dowd on Slappy
    MoDo the Dragon Lady sinks her claws into Clarence Thomas

  Click  Here

 In his dissent, he snidely dismisses the University of Michigan Law School's desire to see minority faces
 in the mix as "racial aesthetics," giving the effort to balance bigotry in society the moral weight of a Benetton ad.
 The phrase "racial aesthetics" would be more appropriately applied to W.'s nominating convention in Philadelphia,
 when the Republicans put on a minstrel show for the white fat cats in the audience.

 So, Maureen - why did you work so gard to elect these animals?

 Justice Thomas scorns affirmative action as "a faddish slogan of the cognoscenti." Quoting Frederick Douglass
 on the "Negro" 140 years ago, he urges: " `All I ask is, give him a chance to stand on his own legs!
 Let him alone! . . . Your interference is doing him positive injury.' "

 He is at the pinnacle, an African-American who succeeded in getting past the Anita Hill sexual harassment scandal
 by playing the race card, calling the hearing "a high-tech lynching," and who got a $1.5 million advance to write
 his African-American Horatio Alger story, "From Pin Point to Points After."

 So why, despite his racial blessings, does he come across as an angry, bitter, self-pitying victim?

 It's impossible not to be disgusted at someone who could benefit so much from affirmative action and then pull up the ladder after himself.
 So maybe he is disgusted with his own great historic ingratitude.

 When he switched from a Democrat to a conservative as a young man, he knew that he would be a hotter commodity in politics.
 But he also knew that it would bring him the scorn of blacks who deemed him a pawn of the white establishment - people like
 Justice Thurgood Marshall, who ridiculed Clarence Thomas and others as "goddamn black sellouts" for benefiting
 from affirmative action and then denigrating it.

 Hey Maureen, why not tell us that story again about Hillary's bridal shower?

 Call the 

You have two minutes to rant away.

Stump Bart and win a free steak dinner for two!


"There's more than two principles at large. There are terrorists  who are  -- still have
  designs are destabilizing the Pakistan government, and are destroying innocent life."
     --President Bloody, with a straight face, Maryland, Jun. 24, 2003

 Excuse me, Mr President?
 How many children have died in Iraq in the last 90 days?
 Any what did they die for, exactly?

 Up is down, black is white, but blood's still red
   by Vicki Gray      saw it on smirkingchimp.com

  Click  Here

 Dissent is not treasonous. It is patriotic.  I, therefore, have no apologies for puncturing the bubble of
 your virtual world with the harsh realities of a very harsh real world.  If we are to survive true to our
 own internal values and safe from real external threats, we must wake up from the frightened fugue
 state we have been dream walking through since September 11. We must face the realities of the
 world clearly and courageously. The time for comfortable self-delusion has long since passed.

 With those ends in mind, won't you follow me on a brief tour of the most egregious current lies about,
 for starters, Iraq?  You don't have to agree with me.  All I ask is that you think about what you read
 and question what you hear...including what I say here.  Be patriotic.  Think critically. Think for yourself.

"This woman must be Al Qaeda. Have her killed and bring me her head."

 Have a good time today - that's an order.

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