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"For the last 22 months, the United States
has been fighting this war across the globe. We have seen
many challenges, and many victories. Those victories have come exactly as President Bush said they
would - sometimes in pitched battle; sometimes in the stealth of special operations; sometimes in
sudden, decisive strikes -- like the one witnessed two days ago by the late Ootie and Cootie."
-- Whistle Dick Cheney, Cheney Fires Back
...and sometimes victory comes when you
murder a country and steal 1 million barrels of oil per day
is why the B.F.E.E. stole the election - so Cheney
could steal a million barrels of oil per day.
Even after expenses, that's about $17M per day, which is not the $500M per day Kennyboy made when he raped California,
but this $17M per day will come in until the Democrats call them on it, which could be never - and all they had to do was have
their puppet lie to us about the reason we had to invade RIGHT NOW ...and get 244 brave Americans killed- so far.
In recent weeks, America has learned that
President Bush's statement in his State of the Union address
that "Saddam Hussein recently sought significant quantities of uranium from Africa" was based on false intelligence.
But President Bush has refused to take responsibility
for the statement he made. Instead, he has pointed
fingers and placed blame in every direction but back at himself.
Apparently, Bush can't take responsibility
for the words that come out of his own mouth.
Just look at the following exchange between a reporter and White House Press Secretary Scott McClellan:
Reporter: I'm asking the question, is responsibility for what
was in the President's
own State of the Union ultimately with the President, or with somebody else?
Scott McClellan: This has been discussed.
Reporter: So you won't say that the President is responsible for his own State of the Union speech?
McClellan: It's been addressed.
Reporter: ...Isn't the President responsible for the words that come out of his own mouth?
McClellan: We've already acknowledged that it should not have
been included in there.
I think that the American people appreciate that recognition. [White House press gaggle, 7/17/03]
Why can't we get straight answers out of
this White House?
Why does President Bush keep trying to pass the buck instead of taking responsibility
for a speech that -- according to the White House -- he reviewed closely?
Hey DNC, I have a great idea - why not have some of those Democrats you're shilling for speak up?
Have you thought about that?
Since the Democrats refuse to do any work, why not hold a "secret
retreat" in the mountains somewhere
and plot a clearly defined strategy to attack this idiot who's getting 2.23 men killed per day in Iraq.
I'll speak at the secret meeting and I'll give a half-time locker
room speech that'll peel f-ing paint off the walls.
Jesus Christ, we're the Green Bay Packers and we're getting our heads kicked in by a first-year coach who's
never played the game before, and his team consists of widows and orphans all afflicted with severe osteoporosis.
Their quarterback is the stupidest man in the history of football. He has to have people dress him because he
doesn't know where the jock strap goes. Yet somehow, the dumb team with broken players is ahead by 40 points.
We're not trying! We don't want to win!
We stare at the scoreboard and say, "Gee, that's too bad," instead of kicking some ass!
If we're going to lose 2004, could we at least go down fighting?
You guys are content to lose by being mice and rabbits and what we need are grizzly bears.
Please - get up off your asses and come to work - please?
"Your problem is, ...you 've never been handled
-- Spencer Tracy
"...not even by myself!"
-- Katherine Hepburn, ...in some 40's B&W movie I saw last night.
Grounding the flying nun
Activists on the left and right -- including a 71-year-old Milwaukee nun and an art dealer who told
other passengers that President Bush "is dumb as a rock" -- have long complained they were being
hassled by airport security. After months of silence, the federal government says: It's true.
I'm sure the BFEE has a list, but I'm disappointed that I'm not
I've called the Monkey Governor an "ignorant son of a bitch" at least a hundred times and I've never
been hassled at am airport. Maybe the clueless bastards are looking for "BartCop," ha ha
Also, and I don't think I've printed this story, but there's a
name of the list that's VERY common,
something like David Miller or Bob Wilson, that's getting every DM and BW bounced off flights.
The Monkey Administration can't seem to get anything right.
"The invasion of Iraq represented a historic
policy shift for the United States. For the first time,
the U.S. attacked a country because our government perceived it as an imminent threat to our people.
The basis for this decision was the interpretation of intelligence gathered by the CIA and other
government agencies about Iraq's development and possession of (WMD). As you know, inspectors
have not found any evidence of the existence of such weapons in Iraq. If our intelligence is not accurate,
as recent press reports have suggested, or if the information was shaded or misrepresented to the
Congress or the American people by the Administration, this is a serious matter that Congress must
thoroughly investigate to ensure the necessary changes are made to prevent this situation from ever
happening again. I am pleased that the Senate Intelligence Committee will soon be holding bipartisan
hearings to look into this matter.
--Debbie Stabenow, United States Senator in a personal letter to a bartcop.com reader
"I had had sexual intercourse with perhaps three or four - I don't remember
the exact number - women at different times," Neil says in the deposition.
As for when and where the trysts occurred,
Neil recalls they were a few years ago
- one in Thailand and one in Hong Kong.
"Our marriage has been broken," Neil says.
Clarification: He was caught three or four times.
He's not crazy enough to admit to 'tutes with whom he was never caught.
is a pretty exciting time for the Allies.
The Soviets are attacking on the Russian Front,
the Western Allies are overrunning Sicily and the
Americans are hitting the Solomon Islands hard.
By now Bush should have realized the tides have shifted, and that the lumbering soporific corporate press was finally rousing.
But now- heedless, ruthless, and vicious, he embarks on his 3rd betrayal: trying to punish Ambassador Joseph Wilson, who
investigated the forged Niger uranium papers in March 2002, reported it was lies- and just blew the whistleÖ by outing his wife
Valerie as a CIA agent involved in secret non-proliferation efforts. This is not just a contemptible violation of national security,
itís a crime with a 10 year prison sentence. The last president who could have been said to betray the CIA was JFK in not
supporting the Bay of Pigs invasion, and while we donít subscribe to Oliver Stoneís thesis (I think the Mafia did it) - Cuban
connections to the assassination were many. Bush is still laboring under the assumption that the CIA is a family business, but itís
been many years since his father ruled that roost. You donít subvert and betray Americaís premier intelligence service without
paying the price. With no shame, Cheney has been defending and repeating the big lies, even while throwing Tenet and Hadley
to the wolves- though no one is ever really sacrificed in this regime.
Removal of George W from Iraq will end guerrilla warfare
Nobody will miss Uday or Qusay, precisely because they were the heirs -- fortunate sons of a tyrant,
men whose lives of cruelty and opulence stood in stark contrast to the misery under which most of the Iraqi population lived.
Planners in Washington would do well to
remember that Iraq is still ruled by a fortunate son.
And he, too, will be resented by Iraqis until the day he is no longer relevant.
Subject: Show 9A &
9B - My Observations, Discussion Points,
and other tangentially-related Bullshit
Subject: please unsubscribe me
I don't know what I've done to you. Realizing
how busy you are with the radio,
I think I've given you the benefit of every doubt or frustration.
I always thought we were friends who had never met.
But you've never written back or posted
stuff I've sent you.
My ego isn't really big enough to be mad, and I figure you get gads of mail,
so it didn't much matter.
But now, with the radio, I just can't take
it. No password. No password. No password.
I write, no answer, no answer, no answer.
No, "Sorry, I just can't get it together yet, please forgive me. "
Well $120 may not mean that much to you
overall, but it's a lot to me.
And I'd rather send it to Dennis Kucinich--even if he ends up quitting the race,
I feel it's better served.
Sorry, can't even read the website anymore.
It just upsets me (to read about the radio) too much.
I know there are others in your situation and I don't know what to do
about it. I didn't mean to
ignore you, and I feel terrible about receiving your subscription money and not getting your login
and password to you. When I input a subscriber by hand, there's a "Check Here" if you want the
subscriber to be notified about login/PW and I must've failed to check yours. You have been a
member for 6 weeks, but that doesn't do you much good if the login/PW never reaches you.
I wish you would give me another chance. I have re-installed you as
and I have sent you a private e-mail with login/PW inside.
There are maybe 12-15 hours of radio shows there.
You might enjoy hearing a bunch of them at once.
(Have a few drinks first, it'll be funnier that way)
Please reconsider and remember that I don't know what else to do.
I hope you will accept my apology.
It seems like catching up is impossible.
If anyone else is in this situation, send
me an e-mail each
with "SUBSCRIBE" in the message header until you hear from me.
I can check the "S" section every few days to see who I missed.
I seem to have three choices:
Hiring some help, which isn't practical - yet.
Continue the status quo and make more subscribers angry.
There could be dozens of subscribers in this same position.
An idea I have rejected up-till-now, which is doing one less page per week.
That extra day could be used to get a lot of paperwork (this kind of thing) done.
Does anyone know of a fix for this?
Also, I got this from a piller:
I know it's impossible for you to look
at every email.
But paying members are a different thing.
I'm not sure how you give people a login and pass but i will say
I had more than a few complaints from people that sent money for membership.
It has been suggested that I set up a separate mail box with "subscribe"
as the trigger.
So if anyone sends me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org with "subscribe" in the header.
it will load into that box where it won't be overlooked.
That's the best suggestion I've heard so far.
I don't want anyone to be in the position of having paid but can't get in.
Chrissie Hynde takes on KFC in Paris
Chrissie Hynde of The Pretenders joined PETA in a protest at a Paris KFC.
Screaming "Respect life, stop the savagery!" and urging passersby to boycott KFC over its
treatment of chickens, the protesters tried in vain to storm the fast-food restaurant in the city
center but were pushed back by private security guards and a dozen police officers.
The activists, including one dressed as
a giant chicken, then spread out into the street,
blocking traffic for nearly an hour. Hynde, who was sporting a black PETA shirt,
is due to perform Friday at a music festival in the western coastal region of Brittany.
Eye on the Straight Guy
Save yourself the time and trust me
Queer Eye on the Straight Guy is a new show on Bravo,
which is owned by NBC.
Apparently, they run an hour on Bravo, and then run a chopped-up, GOP-half-hour version on NBC.
This is the funniest show on TV right now.
Sure, we're in reruns, but this reminds me of the first few times I saw The Osbournes.
Remember how funny it was when it was fresh?
This Queer Eye is laugh-out-loud funny.
The way I understand it (remember my middle name is not Brittanica),
they find a clueless
straight guy and have five very gay men fix him up and make him less Oklahoma.
They prepare him for a dream date with his girl, after the gays guys make him over.
Just guessing, but one of the gay guys is a interior decorator.
He goes to the dude's apartment and picks up the beer cans and pizza boxes from 1999,
and changes it to a nice, cool apartment with a color scheme and funky furniture.
Another gay guy picks out his new clothes. They aren't gay clothes,
but Okies don't
know nothing but cowboy boots and F-150 pickups. These gay guys, and they are RIOTS,
especially the blonde guy who's a f-ing hoot no matter of you're straight or gay.
Another guy is a gay chef, and he teaches the Okie how to prepare
a low-cal, yet spectacular
fish dinner for his date, which is the point of the show.
All in all, the five gay guys make the Okie into a hottie for
the first half hour.
For the second half hour, ha ha, this is paydirt.
They've lined the Okie's apartment with cameras.
The straight guy has his girl over, she sees his new look, she
sees his new haircut, she sees his
newly decorated apartment, she eats his cooking... There's more, but it was fleeting...
The five gay guys are watching Sparky's girlfriend's reaction to the "new him."
Each time she reacts to his newness, the gay gang hoots and hollers
Remember, this is early-Osbourne funny.
This stuff is so hot, when it's over, you'll call or e-mail your
dawgs and homies and say,
"Yo, did you see that shit?"
It's on Wednesday.
It's as funny as it can be.
Musta been ten times I burst out laughing against my will.
This show is so white-hot (it broke records on Bravo) it won't be here for long.
It's so hot, it will be less hot in six months, so catch it now while it's the funniest show on TV.
Maybe bartcop.com needs a gay correspondent, to comment on all things gay.
Do yourself a favor - next Wednesday, watch the Bravo "Queer
Eye' (screw NBC's homophobia)
and send in your review. One reason I'm sure the next show will be good is the straight guy was a
total dud, the most uninteresting man I've seen on TV in a long time. The gay guys make this show.
TCM (Turner Classic Movies) offers both 'Dr. Strangelove' and 'Car Wash' today
PBS special with Gore Vidal
Will & Jada Pinkett Smith guesting on UPN
Jack London's house is for sale in Oakland, CA
Liza Minnelli is single, again
The murals of San Quentin
The cat burglar that really is a cat
And, a bunch of links
PS - The name the FAA can't keep straight is 'David Nelson'
- as in Ozzie & Harriet's elder son. '
Happy 2nd Birthday to Marty's E! Page!
Subject: Are you having fun?
I've been listening to the radio show on
and off during work.
I sincerely enjoy it (BUT my coworkers are annoyed at my suddenly constant
habit of muttering "sons of bitches" in a distinctively non-Wisconsin accent).
Are you having fun recording it? I hope so...
Yes, it's a lot of fun, and it's about to get a bunch funner.
The gang at takebackthemedia.com has shown us how to make the show tons better.
Changes are underway.
Thanks for the note...
Click to visit fauxnewschannel.com
Have a question or a comment?
Email Bart email@example.com
Before you humiliate yourself by jumping onto the Kobe Bryant
Bandwagon, wait to see the police photos of the victim
They are the reason that Hurlburt filed charges, and they are reportedly quite enlightening.
So, you're saying you heard some rumors
that she has bruises?
By the way, Einstein, the first thing the
D.A. does is check the computerized records of the victim
in order to determine credibility, and this D.A. is much more cautious than most.
You flatter me with the comparison, but
I'm no Einstein.
You could put a "1" in front of my IQ and I still couldn't catch Ol' Al.
...and interesting - where did you get the
info that this DA is "much more cautious than
Did you get that off the Internet? I understand the Internet is a cornucopia of honesty and truth.
You - and the other Simpson jurors - are likely to be waiting a long time for that "bombshell".
Another mistake on your part - I was not
a Simpson juror.
They won't let an Okie sit on the jury in a California trial.
I do congratulate you on your ability to
determine Bryant's innocence by reading the expressions on his face.
That's quite a gift - who needs physical evidence?
I said he appeared shocked and bewildered,
whereas Slappy just seemed pissed that he got caught.
As you get older, you'll learn to read people better.
Finally, your "black perpetrator/white victim/racist
mob" scenario should be properly referenced
- you are plagiarizing from Johnnie Cochran, who nine years ago represented another "innocent
black victim of the white racist power structure".
It almost sounds like you're saying
Kobe is guilty because he's black.
I'll bet you're a Republican.
You have a nutty way of re-arranging things
that I've written.
If I say, "It looks like rain," you start screaming, "Why do you want it to rain so hard
that the resulting flood wipes out the orphans at St. Michael's Orphanage."
I have a lil' tip for you:
If you're going to misquote someone, don't do it when the quote is just a click away.
You seem to be saying (see how we differ?)
"Black men accused of raping white girls
justice when the jury is all white." That, or "There is no race problem in America anymore."
I don't think that's true.
Wait for the photos of her bruised face and body, my little Black Panther wannabe.
First I'm Einstein, then a Simpson juror, now I want to be a Black Panther? Are they still together?
Even if she shows up looking like Tyson after the Lennox Lewis
fight, they'll need forensics to prove
Kobe was responsible. IF I understand the situation, she's tried to kill herself three times in seven months,
four if you count walking into an NBA player's hotel room. Do you think it's unusual for a suicidal woman
to have bruises on her body?
Next time you feel froggy, why not copy-and-paste my words, and
Or would quoting me verbatim kill your momentum?
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Rich, famous slide through Colorado courts
John Denver, (DWI) Claudine Longet (Murder) Patsy Ramsey (Murder?)
Butch Cassidy (Bank robbery) Ted Bundy (Murder) Kneel Bush ($1 Billion missing)
Bush was an executive for
a Colorado oil company, JNB Exploration, and a
member of the board of directors of Silverado Banking, Savings & Loan here.
The oil company never was profitable, but
its investors still were rewarded.
Bush approved hundreds of millions in loans to them from Silverado, loans that were never repaid.
When Silverado failed, it posted $1 billion in losses, most of which were covered by taxpayers.
Bush was not prosecuted in the Silverado fraud. He was fined $50,000 instead.
Kneel Bush and his B.F.E.E. Jr. buddies stole a billion dollars, and paid a tiny, tiny fine and the press
dropped it because the Bush family criminals are above the law.
"That's a good boy..."
But when Jim McDougal got froggy with the S&L books on 1/50th
the scale of the Bush robbery,
(The NYWhore Times was instrumental at fabricating lies against Clinton) Congress spent $70M trying
to catch an innocent man and his wife, while the Bush boys skate away clean with their billion dollar booty.
Subject: BartCop radio 9B
Killer rant on Dennis Miller!
His material is disgusting and unfunny, and you exposed his ignorance.
I only hope that someone who knows Dennis Miller sends him this clip.
What a dumb, pathetic GOP shill he is.
Leno's audience is comprised mostly of dittoheads so it may be the
only place where his material goes over. Put him on Bill Maher and
he gets only dead silence or boos.
The guy is washed up.
The long-term result of Bush's lies about al Qaeda activity in Iraq is that many elements of the
terrorist organization have been attracted to participate in guerilla warfare in the now-occupied nation.
Talk about self-fulfilled prophesy!
Had Uday and Qusay Hussein been taken alive
they could have answered a lot of questions
--which probably explains why they weren't taken alive.
"This isn't a blow job - it's a war!"
-- Aaron Magruder to Bill Maher, when Maher said impeachment was too strong a punishment
for Bush for getting 244 Americans killed for no goddamn reason.
Yahoo did some spam on Vegas vacations
I clicked on because my 50th birthday is 6 weeks away and I gotta
be somewhere special
(with Mrs Bart) on that weekend, so naturally Vegas comes to mind...
And my recent obsession with poker has nothing to do with that.
Hold "em Sidebar:
When you own a bar, the worst three words you can hear are "I'm from Louisiana." Not that people
from Louisiana are bad, but those who feel the need to tell the bartender need "special handling." The last
time this happened to me, things got really ugly. We had an extra-beefy bouncer named Greg. He was a
weight-lifter and you could tell that from far away. He was just a little smaller than The Hulk.
So this Louisiana Looney got drunk fast
and started causing trouble. The bouncer told him to calm down
and knock it off or he'd have to leave. Loony gave him some lip, but nothing happened.
(Did I mention this was a biker bar?)
The Loony continued to screw up, so Greg
told him he'd have to leave. The Loony said,"You're right,
I was out of line - no hard feelings?" and extended his hand in friendship. When the beefy bouncer went
to shake it, the Loony sucker punched him, broke his glasses, cut him, causing blood to run down his face.
This idiot did this in front of Greg's
biker friends - it was not a well-thought out move. Greg screamed
"Hold 'em," and two big bikers grabbed the Loony by the arms and Greg went to work on him with a righteous
fury that I had never seen before. Greg pounded this wacko for a while. Greg was all left-right-left-right-left-right
until his arms were too tired to punch anymore. They didn't kill him - he ended up walking away under his own
power, which was damn surprising. Greg hurt his hand beating this guy and that ended his bouncing days.
To this day, whenever I hear "Hold "em" or "I'm from Louisiana," I recall that handjob who sucker punched
a weightlifter in front of his biker friends. I made a mental note to never do that, because I've never seen a man
take that kind of beating and I have no desire to find out what that feels like. When men fight, it's mostly missed punches
and lots of rolling around. But this guy was stood up like Michael when Sterling Hayden broke his jaw in The Godfather,
except, like The Beatles in their prime, the hits just kept on coming.
So, it said, "Southwest Airlines offers Vegas with 2 hotels for
I know SW well enough to know they're not lying. They may have caveats,
but they have always delivered the goods as far as I'm concerned.
So I clicked on it, just to see, and they are offering complete
airfare for two AND
two nights at a fabulous Vegas hotel, which in this case is "Westward Ho-Rear."
Mrs. Bart has been in some nice Las Vegas hotel rooms.
I'm not sure the "Westward Ho-Rear"
make her happy, and since I want to be happy on the night I turn extra, extra old, it always helps to ensure
her happiness to ensure mine. So, I have six weeks to think of something special.
Plus, Mrs Bart was also born in 1953, so she's getting
a trip to Rigel 7 for that.
I opened a special "Mrs Bart's 50th"savings account at the bank.
Could someone remind me around the middle of December?
There are some things a husband can't screw up.
So that's what we've got.
My 50th and her 50th, hitting 90 days apart.
Hey, we were broke when we got married,
we were broke when I lost $40K in the Hard Rock Island,
we were broke when I lost the Train Station,
so if she wants a tornadoe* for her 50th birthday,
I really need to find her a damn tornado.
Good thing I have 20 years in the finance business.
After revelations that Kobe Bryant's accuser was hospitalized last winter for mental health reasons,
a judge issued a gag order on attorneys, witness and others involved in the sexual assault case,
seeking to quell rumors and reports that could affect a trial.
UNC's police chief said that campus police
received a call about 9 p.m. on Feb. 25 regarding
a woman in a dormitory room.
"An officer determined she was a danger to herself," he said. "It's classified as a mental health issue."
Boycott the vulgar Pigboy on ESPN
I'd like to ask that you sign the petition
telling ESPN you will boycott their network
if they don't back away from hiring Rush Limbaugh as a sportscaster.
Please go to http://www.network54.com/Hide/Forum/257263
to sign up
and please forward this link far and wide to all discussion forums and websites!
Subject: Dennis Miller
Having read "Bart
vs. Dennis Miller," I can only come to the conclusion that Miller
is engaging in
the biggest pisstake since Andy Kaufman and Jerry Lawler (forgive the dated reference, I swear
I'm NOT like DM!)
He REALLY can't be serious. Golf with Wally
George? Either he's playing a grand (and potentially hilarious)
joke or we're all stuck in a bizarre Philip K. Dick novel where the authorities have killed or imprisoned the real
Miller and replaced him with an evil simulacrum. Honestly, I'm not sure which scenario is more likely.
Anyway, one more thing. I'm one of the 12
lucky benefactors of a generous fellow named Jim.
I'm enjoying my subscription, as your page is the only one on the whole 'net that absolutely MUST visit daily.
Keep on giving the repugnicans hell.
I, too, considered the possibility that
Miller was pulling our lariat, but he's on the Tonight Show telling the
families of the dead soldiers to "get over it," and I don't think you can do that as part of a joke.
It's rare that you see a man change his entire political philosophy
and then shove his head that far up
the ass of the former enemy. Rosie O'Donnell did the same thing and she disappeared.
The only time she makes news anymore is when she damages herself with a knife.
Subject: Randy Weaver
Wasn't Ruby Ridge an event under George
H. W. Bush?
Exactly how was Clinton involved before he was elected?
Jerry, great question!
Since Rush, (and most other lying GOP bastards) has nobody to call him on his lies,
he lies constantly because the ignorant ditto-monkeys WANT those lies to be true.
The more outrageous the lie, they more they love their vulgar Pigboy
This isn't a slip of the tongue, either.
I've heard Rush say a dozen times that Clinton ordered Randy Weaver's wife murdered.
But that happened in 1992, and they don't let the Arkansas governor order the ATF around.
Truth is, Bush the Smarter was president, but that ruins Rush's
"Clinton murdered the children of Waco just like he murdered Randy Weaver's wife."
This is why talk radio is so entertaining.
They're not restricted to the truth, or the facts, or history.
They make shit up, ignorant ditto-monkeys buy it, Rush makes millions and Clear Channel makes billions.
Armstrong coasts into Paris for FIFTH victory
There's also tons of baseball.
Check out BartCopSports!
And hey, drop Steve a line!
Get involved, send in your opinions.
Click to Enter
"We have a tradition of respecting the dead
... We objected to the showing of bodies of
American servicemen. It's kind of ironic that we turn around and display dead folks now."
--Colonel Dan Smith, retired military intelligence officer, Attribution
In 1976, my wife and I went to three or four of these military cemeteries and saw
all the young soldiers buried there. And... couple of months later, I wrote a song
called "No Man's Land," which is asking questions of a dead soldier...
And I can't help but wonder
now, Willie McBride,
Do all those who lie here know why they died?
Did you really believe them when they told you "the cause?"
Subject: 9-11 question
why have we never been able to hear the
cockpit voice recorder
from the plane that crashed in western pennsylvania?
Maybe Cheney doesn't want people to hear, "Why is that F-16 shooting at us?"
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American soldier body count in Iraq
It now stands at
Note: Believe this figure.
It's from http://lunaville.org/warcasualties/Summary.aspx
This is depressing.
We're averaging 2.23 dead men every day.
And they say we'll be there five years or longer?
My Catholic math says that's 3,965 lives thrown away for the
Unelected Idiot and his dream of stealing Saddam's oil.
Plus, in war you always have to assume things will get worse.
Why can't he go after Osama, and leave the 9-11 non-responsibles
Is it because old Bush Family friend Osama doesn't have any oil?
You have two minutes to rant away.
Have a good time today - that's an order.
Use this portal and they'll throw bartcop.com four cents.
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Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
© 2003, bartcop.com
Shirley - call The
BartPhone, just to say "Hi!"
Maybe leave a two-minute message...
I'll play it for your fans at bartcop.com
Maybe say some nasty things about fascist monkey called Bush.
Shirley, as far as I know, our politics are identical.
a horrid madman and a savage killer.
He's a stupid criminal and a greedy, blood-loving bastard.
Plus, leave an e-mail address and I'll make you a BartCop Member - for free!
Call the Bart-Phone at 918-493-1500
That would be really cool, and we'll catch you at the Vegas Hard Rock on your next American tour.
bartcop.com and BartCop are trademarks of quality
Same for "ditto-monkey," "scum-sucking Republican bastards" and Gov Bush (R-Racist monkey)