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  In Today's Treehouse...
U.S. Warns Fallujah
Pentagon hid Rummy comment 
Why Won't Dubya Apologize? 
D-r-i-v-e   b-y   N-e-w-
Bush's 'heartland'
Negroponte the torturer's friend
When a Flip-Flop Makes Sense
The Body Politic
PF Palm Beach 5 days away


Quote of the Day

"I don't regret the vote. I regret how the 
  president used that authority. Bush has 
  made stunning mistakes, and it's insulting 
  that bin Laden is still around to taunt us." 
   -- Hillary, when asked if she regretted voting 
       for the president's war resolution,  Attribution

"I got rich off this war..." 

Bart Store

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Volume 1299 - Got sac?

Click and see what these guys do

  Wed-Thurs   April  21-22, 2004


"He is speaking to these people as though they are contributors to his campaign.
  This is the thing that is admirable. I love this. I got to tell you, I love Bush because he doesn't care."
      --Rush the vulgar Pigboy, on Bush's speech to the Newspaper Editors in Washington,  Attribution

 U.S. Warns Fallujah Fighting Could Resume 
   Invading army warns invasion might continue?

"I'm a man of peace when I murder a country..."

  Click  Here

 Guerrillas and residents in Fallujah have "days, not weeks" to turn in heavy weapons,
 the top Marine commander in Iraq said Thursday, warning that fighting could resume
 and that a U.S. push to take the city could be costly for both sides.

 The stark warning by Lt. Gen. James Conway came two days after an agreement was reached
 in which city leaders called on insurgents to hand over their heavy weapons in return for a U.S.
 pledge to hold back on plans to storm the city and allow the return of families that fled the city.

 Marines have said few weapons have been turned in and that most that were surrendered were old or didn't work.

 That's the problem with being stuck in a quagmire - the bluff doesn't work.
 We're on the offensive in a place we know nothing about.
 All they gotta do is hide and pick off marine after marine.

 This isn't working. There are 25 million of them.
 They're willing to die to save their town, their country.

 Wait - why are we dying in Iraq?
 I forget.

  Care to comment?



"We've got to be strong and resolute and determined. We will never show
  weakness in the face of these people who have no soul, who have no conscience,
  who care less about the life of a man or a woman or a child.
    --Dubya, who has killed more innocent people in the last year than all terrorists combined, Attribution

 Pentagon Deleted Rumsfeld Comment
  Covering up the crimes of the Sec of Defense?

  Click  Here

 The Pentagon deleted from a public transcript a statement Rumsfeld made to Bob Woodward
 suggesting that the administration gave Saudi Arabia a two-month heads-up that Bush had decided
 to invade Iraq and illegally steal their assets and their oil.

 At issue was a passage in Woodward's "Plan of Attack," an account published this week of Bush's
 decision making about the war, quoting Rumsfeld as telling Prince Bandar bin Sultan, the Saudi ambassador
 to Washington, in January 2003 that he could "take that to the bank" that the invasion would happen.

 Yet the whole time, Bush was telling America he hadn't yet made up his mind.
 We know he was lying because he decided to invade Iraq before he took office.
 Why is it wrong to lie to us about a blow job but OK to lie us into an illegal war that's killed 700?

  Care to comment?


Get your 'No Monkey Zone"
mousepads, coffee mugs and shirts


"The lesson, too, is that if it is worth fighting for, you had better be prepared to win.
  Also, there must be a political game plan that will permit the withdrawal of our forces
  - something that is still completely absent in Kosovo. The military is not a civilian police force.
  It is not a political referee. And it is most certainly not designed to build a civilian society.
  Using the American armed forces as the world's "911" will degrade capabilities, bog soldiers down
  in peacekeeping roles, and fuel concern among other great powers that the United States has decided
  to enforce notions of "limited sovereignty" worldwide in the name of humanitarianism."
   --Condi Rice, lecturing the world on quagmires in January 2000   Attribution(via) http://atrios.blogspot.com/

 Quagmires is bad

 Subject: Negroponte, beloved supplier of arms to Iran...

 Another marriage made in some dark,  repiglican sub-dimension, where the guy who,
 as Ambassador to Honduras,  helped the Nicaraguan Death-Squadders spend some
 of that illicit loot Reagan and Bush 1 earned by selling arms to Iran, (for the killing of Iraqis)
 is gonna represent the US of A to the happy citizens of an all-new,  way-free Iraq.


  Care to comment?

 Why Won't Dubya Apologize? 
  Botched 9/11 info, two botched wars, a gutted economy, global scorn. Why can't W be a man?

  Click  Here

 He is, apparently, immune. He is perfect and flawless and without the slightest taint of guilt or error, and, despite
 looking like a bowl of Jell-O salad in a universe of divine tiramisu, he is, apparently, an angel of purity and light. It's true.

 For here is Dubya, mumbling his way through another shockingly insulting news conference just recently, screwing up
 both his face and his intelligence data (again) and still a-huntin' for nonexistent WMDs in Iraqi turkey farms (?) as reporter
 after reporter asks him, point blank, why he won't simply come clean.

  Care to comment?

 Bush's 'heartland'
    by Gene Lyons

  Click  Here

 Following President Bush's stunningly incoherent press conference, his media acolytes
 reintroduced one of their most useful fictions: the decadent, blue-state "Beltway elite"
 vs. salt of-the-earth, red-state "real Americans." Based upon TV electoral maps that
 colored Al Gore states in 2000 blue, Bush states red, it's a theme GOP imagineers have
 exploited since Newt Gingrich pronounced Democrats "enemies of normal Americans."
 Even his admirers had to notice that Bush had no answer for the deeply embarrassing
 question of why he can't testify before the 9/11 Commission without Dick Cheney
 holding his hand. In the Weekly Standard, however, Fred Barnes invoked geography.
 The president's real audience, see, "is outside the Beltway-the mass - and he does
 surprisingly well in appealing to it. How does he do it? By being plain spoken and
 amiable and down to earth. By sounding more like Midland, Texas, than like
 Georgetown or Chevy Chase."

 Subject: cardinals home opener

 Hey Bart,  I am a long time reader of your page and wanted to let you know about
 a friend of mine's experience at the Cardinal game when the chimp threw out the first pitch.

 I asked her if she booed when bush came out and she said she did.  Well, I had to laugh
 because I know she comes from a long line of repugs.   What she told me next was not so funny.

 She said the man sitting next to her was crying,  she said "dude are you ok"?,
 He said "That son of a bitch killed 2 of my brothers in Iraq."

 He was yelling and screaming at bush when he came out.
 I know it sounds hard to believe but I do believe it.
 They are counting on us to not believe how horrible this war has become.
 No wonder they piped in applause.


  Care to comment?

 Subject: Dude, WTF?

 Let's just take one issue from your idiotic site...
 Let's say that Rush Limbaugh is diabolical... umm, that's evil to you...
 I'll stick to small words from now on.

 Let's just say Rush is evil.
 OK, that would make you Satan.

 You're site is ten times worse than how most liberals characterize Limbaugh's show.
 Hello Pot!  Meet Kettle!

 email me when you get a clue..  K?

 Jerry Mackey

 Dude, if you had me in a live chat room,
 I'll bet you could tear me apart - limb by limb.
 How's Friday night at 9 PM CST?

 Go here  and click on "Bartcop Chat" in the upper right corner.

 Please understand that I'll be nervous, because you sound like a handful.
 I don't have much experience at this, so be gentle, OK?

 See you tomorrow night.
 Promise to go easy on me?

 Suiciders Kill 68 in Southern Iraq
  But we all agree Bush is doing a great job in Iraq

  Click  Here

 Dominican Republic to Pull Out of Iraq
  But the American press says the coalition of the blackmailed is still strong

  Click  Here

 Experts Race to Fix Serious Internet Flaw
  Paul Watson says he can crash the internet worldwide

  Click  Here

 Oceans in deep trouble; U.S. must help, panel says
  But Bush and Rush say the ocean cleans itself, so why bother?

  Click  Here

 Nine Killed in Saudi Car Bomb Explosions
  What a great war president he is, too

  Click  Here

Click for more

 Negroponte, the torturer's friend
    saw it on smirkingchimp.com

  Click  Here

 "The embassy was aware of numerous kidnappings of leftists." It also said that Negroponte
 played an active role in whitewashing human rights abuses.

"Specific examples of brutality by the Honduran military typically never appeared in the human
 rights reports, prepared by the embassy under the direct supervision of Ambassador Negroponte,"
 the paper wrote. " The reports from Honduras were carefully crafted to leave the impression that
 the Honduran military respected human rights."

 So this is the man who is going to show the Iraqis the way toward democracy?


 Subject: what a babe

 It's hard to find a woman as pretty as Susan McDougal who has the balls not to be pushed around by Ken Starr.
 I applaud her, and Bart, your behaviour around such a beautiful woman was quite commendable as well.
 I would have proposed to her on the spot.

 I'm a happily married man...

 Ask her to go to Marty's E-Page and read Jazz From Hills, and if she likes the essay, tell her
 to reach me at trimmedbush.blogspot.com and we'll go to dinner here in Santa Fe!!!!

 LOLO.....Good job, ladies and gents....keep it up

  Care to comment?   Now with working link!

saw it on  http://www.izzyguaal.com

 When a Flip-Flop Actually Makes Sense
    by Joe Conason

  Click Here

 At long last, George W. Bush is beginning to behave more like a politician than a zealot. After months and years of
 ill-concealed hostility to the United Nations, he now turns to the international civil servants in Turtle Bay to save his
 mission in Iraq from catastrophe. United Nations envoy Lakhdar Brahimi has been "tasked" to clean up the administration's
 political wreckage and avert chaos after June 30, when sovereignty will supposedly revert to the Iraqi people.

 In another signal of the importance suddenly accorded to international institutions by the White House, the President has
 also nominated U.N. Ambassador John Negroponte to serve as ambassador to the new Iraq. Mr. Negroponte, one of
 the nation's most experienced diplomats, was notably unenthusiastic about the drive to war last year, even while he
 dutifully carried out the President's reckless policies.

  Care to comment?

 Subject: Now you've got me

 Dear Bart,

 You have finally convinced me I must subscribe...even though neither my husband or I are employed.
 It was that bit about how if only 1% of your readers subscribed you could advertise that tipped me over the edge...

 I have been reading you regularly for a year and have grown increasingly fond of you...so fond that I was afraid
 to listen to your radio show for fear I wouldn't like your voice. It took a long time for me work up the courage to
 listen to a sample, lucky for me you have a great voice.

 One of the other reasons I subscribed is your take on "the invisible cloud being". I get soooo tired of religon.
 It wouldn't be so  bad if people could keep it to themselves, but they  have to convince everyone that their way is only way.
 Paula Poundstone does a bit I like about how atheists have no imperative to convert. You'll never open your door to an atheist
 saying "I am here to tell you there is no word and please accept this complimentary blank book". After 9/11 I took some flak
 for refusing to join the chorus proclaiming Islam a peaceful religion. I won't say Christianity is a peaceful religion either...

 Thank you for fighting the good fight, keep swinging the hammer.
 I love you.

 A I


"I glance at the headlines just to kind of a flavor for what's moving.
  I rarely read the stories, and get briefed by people who are probably read the news themselves."
    -pResident George W. Bush,   no Attribution

 Grand Jury Indicts Michael Jackson
  This is news even tho they could indict a ham sandwich?

  Click  Here

 Several newspapers and television networks cited unidentified sources saying the
 Santa Barbara County grand jury had indicted Jackson. None of the reports included
 details about the indictments, and there was no official confirmation or announcement.

 I imagine that the sheriff with the woody for Michael Jackson leaked this,
 and I have no idea if he'd guilty or innocent because I wasn't there,
 but why the hell don't they bring this to trial and get it over with?

 I think, like impeachment, there's money to be made with this, so they're going to drag this out
 for as many dollars as the story's worth. Guilty or not, can't we make this story go away?

 Trust me, this will be the biggest story of 2006 or 2007 and we'll all have to suffer thru it till then.
 This isn't about child abuse or getting justice - this is about the press making money - again.

  Care to comment?   Now with working link!

 Subject: Susan McDougal

 This is a fabulous book!
 The trials that Susan went through were mind-boggling,
 yet she met them with absolute integrity and honor.
 What a fantastic heroine Susan was and is!


 Excerpts from Susan's 4/17 speech is in Show 36 - which should be up tonight.

 Hey, how about a sneak peak?
 Check this - Susan explains why Ol' Bart thinks Scott Peterson deserves a fair trial.
 This is spooky, she says what I've been saying about Peterson all these months.

 Click  Here


Marty's Entertainment Page


"One of Suskind's most severe critiques of Bush was not only Bush's lack of press conferences
  but also his management of those conferences. For each press conference, the White House
  press secretary asks the reporters for their questions, selects six or seven of the questions to
  answer and those reporters are the only ones called upon to ask their questions during the press
  conference, Suskind said. This system makes it so that the president has answers already prepared
  for questions that he knows will be asked, Suskind said.
    --Zach Fox,   Attribution

 You mean The Monkey had the questions in advance?
 And he was whining about ideas popping into his head with no notice?
 The Monster can't even answer scripted questions?

 Subject: Show 35


 GREAT show!
 # 35 was the best yet, you had my whole family in stitches with the turkey farm bit.
 Hope your credit card thief ends up behind bars too, maybe
 George and c.c. boy could be cell mates. keep up the good work.


  Subject: Show 35 nailed the emporer - exactly

 I just listened to #35 and I am so glad you took that phoney 'news conference' apart.
 Sometimes I think I am alone in this world listening to the man the Supremes gave us
 (and trying not to bite my tongue off and poking out my eye...).

 I can only hope that some people who listened to our War President may change their mind
 about voting in November. Thank you for putting into words what many of us 'out here' feel.

 Hope soon you can get on Air America or somewhere so the ignorant masses can hear the truth!
 Keep hammerin!!!

 Subject: BCR Show 35 was great

 Hey from Kai,

 That show #35 proves you got what it takes.
 I had my doubts but you proved me wrong.
 The mixing, the music, the editing, the commentary.
 All perfect.  It's the best ever.  So effing perfect.
 You had me peeing down my leg :)  You need to get syndication.

 However there is one little problem and it's your pronunciation of Chinaco Añejo.
 It's not Chinaco "A Nay Ho."  It's Chinaco "An Yay Ho."
 See the little tilde above the "n."  The little squiggly thingy?
 It's called an "enyay" if I remember my high school Spanish correctly.
 But after a couple shots who the heck cares?

 Keep up the fight and the swingin' of the hammer.


 Kai, thanks for that.
 The thing is, "An Yay Ho," takes too long to say and I'm a busy guy.

  Care to comment?   Now with working link!


 Subject: grn

 Do they pay you to try and keep us in the box?

 I'm not sure what that means, if anything,
 but nobody is paying me besides the subscribers.
 What box are you in that you can't get out of?

 You're transparent as hell.

 That sounds like you're about to launch an argument against me.
 I'm really looking forward to this.  I enjoy a good tangle.

 Be sure and give me your arrested development blow off.
 Richard Spencer

 Damn, I thought we were going to tangle, but then you turned all pussy on me.
 Got sac?
 Do you have any friends with balls who might take me on?
 I enjoy a good tangle.

 Political Conversation: Condi's Slip

  Click  Here

 At a recent dinner party hosted by New York Times D.C. bureau chief Philip Taubman and his wife,
 Times reporter Felicity Barringer, and attended by Arthur Sulzberger Jr., Maureen Dowd, Steven Weisman,
 and Elisabeth Bumiller, Rice was reportedly overheard saying, "As I was telling my husb - " and then stopping
 herself abruptly, before saying, "As I was telling President Bush...."

 Jaws dropped, but a guest says the slip by the unmarried politician, who spends weekends with the president
 and his wife, seemed more psychologically telling than incriminating. Nobody thinks Bush and Rice are actually an item.
 A National Security Council spokesman laughed and said, "No comment."

An excerpt from  Show 35

  Click  Here for a quick taste

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 professionally mixed by  Tommy Mack.

 Remember, if you PayPal, mention your address.

    Click Here   to send your review of Show 35

 Iraqi Backer of U.S. Became Its Victim
 Journalist slain with his driver by troops had supported occupation.
 Reaction to his death shows moderates losing faith in Americans.

  Click  Here

"I could hear the bullets hitting my colleagues' bodies over and over," Kamel said. "It was a terrible sound."..

 Kamel asserted that they were fired on without provocation. But Kimmitt said the press vehicle failed to yield
 to warning shots after the occupants were observed filming "Iraqi Civil Defense Corps and Iraqi police checkpoints,
 a coalition base, and routes to and from these locations." He said five signs in the area clearly prohibited filming or stopping near the base.

 Kamel, however, said the Al Iraqiya reporters did not film the base. Their car was in motion and they were not filming
 anything when the firing began, he said. The experience has hardened his attitude toward the occupiers.

"I told Asaad he was too trusting of the Americans," Kamel said. 'But he always believed in them.'"


Click to Enter

 Subject: Diverting money from Afghanistan while Osama slips away

 I haven't heard anybody comment on this, but aside fom all the other stinky aspects
 of the diversion of Afghan War money to prepare for the illegal Iraq Attack, how about
 the fact that the diversion began just weeks after Osamma slipped out from between
 the "hammer and the anvil" at Tora Bora?

 In other words, at a time when the country thinks our guys are in hot pursuit of evil doer number one,
 the Secretary of "Defense" is illegally removing financial resources from the hunt.


 Neal, Osama is the Monkey's good luck charm.
 The Monkey needs Osama to win in November.

 Osama gave him a 90 percent approval rating and
 Bush made Osama the Number One Muslim in the world.

 They are a team - and always have been.

 We have a new address for advertisers - ads@bartcop.com

Got a business or a web site that needs more clicks?
 It pays to advertise on  bartcop.com

 The net's best advertising bargain!

 Make your deal today  before May 1, when convention prices take effect.

 The Body Politic
  by MoDo the Dragon Lady - she hates everybody - this time it's Smirk

  Click  Here

"Not since Jane Goodall lived with chimps in Tanzania has there been such a vivid study of
 the nonverbal patterns of primates engaged in a dominance display. Bob Woodward's new
 book, "Plan of Attack," reveals that President Bush decided to go to war based mostly,
 believe it or not, on body language.

 Like his father, Mr. Bush prefers more elemental means of self-expression than the verbal.
 (Not long before the first gulf war, Bush senior's masseuse told a client that the president's neck
 was so tight, she assumed we were going to war.) The younger Bush, suspicious of Clintonesque
 dialectical fevers and interminable analyses, did not bother to ask most of his top advisers what
 they thought. The less Dick Cheney talked, the more power Mr. Bush entrusted in him.

 Like the silent, cool-hand cowboy he aspires to be, who would shoot a man just because he
 didn't like the way the varmint was looking at him, the president preferred doing gut checks,
 visually sizing up advisers and Saddam, rather than dwelling on pesky facts."

Bush's American soldier body count in Iraq
  April 1, 2004 - 600dead American soldiers.
April 22, 2004 - 706 dead American soldiers.

That's 106 dead brave soldiers in three weeks.
Things aren't getting better - they're getting worse.
This plane gets more full every day.

Hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of coffins



 Judge: Back off from medical pot group

  Click  Here

"A judge on Wednesday ordered the federal government to keep away from a California medical
 marijuana group that grows and distributes cannabis for its sick members. The decision from U.S.
 District Judge Jeremy Fogel in San Jose was the first interpretation of a federal appeals court
 decision here last year that ordered the federal government not to prosecute a sick Oakland
 woman who smoked marijuana with a doctor's recommendation"

 Sanity about God's flowers?
 That's unheard of...

  Care to comment?   Now with working link!

 Subject: Holiday Inn Express crooks


 Enjoyed show # 35.
 In order to prevail over Holiday Inn, you will need to show that they were negligent
 in hiring the youthful offender, as in they didn't check his background, etc.
 Simply having an employee commit a criminal act is generally not enough.
 It was not within the scope of his employment.

 Good luck,

 TJ, this is a poker bluff thing.
 I'll threaten to tell the world that HI employs crooked people
 who will copy your credit card and then steal from you.

 My threat to drag them into small claims court (good up to $4500),
 which will surely make the St Louis newspapers, should be enough.
 I mean, who wants to stay in a place where the employees rob you?
 Saying, "I sue people for a living" is a scary sentence, especially for the guilty.

 Plus, I did have actual damages. EVERY monthly bill I have runs thru that card,
 and re-submitting a new card number to ALL those places is a big demand on a busy guy like me.

 I'm going to ask for $2500, but I'll settle for ten nights at HI around the country.
 That'll be a good fit with my free SW Airlines flights :)

 ...everybody should learn to play poker.

 The St Louis cops just called, the purp is in custody.

 "What are you in for?"

 "Murder and bank robbery - how about you?"

 "I stole $60 worth of pizza from BartCop."

 "What's a BartCop?"

Do you have an opinion?
Do any GOP impressions?

Call the

Then  listen for your call on...

You have two minutes to spit your bit.

 Pokerfest Palm Beach - Monday, April 26

 I know that sounds crazy, but I'll be damned if we let free airline tickets expire.
 We've never been to Florida, so we're going to fly in and spend a few days there,
 so the exact date is flexible, so let's shoot for Palm Beach, the evening of Monday the 26th.

 Click  Here  if you're in for cheap poker and please put 'poker' in the title, OK?

 If you're in, I have to know soon.
  Time is running out...the game is in five days.

  Contact Bart - if you're a poker player near Palm Beach

 Subject: O'Franken O'Disaster


 Leave it to that moron Franken to be involved in a fiasco.

 I haven't heard about the O'Franken O'Fiasco.

 The Democrats are the bottom of the barrel.
 They can't do anything right with the trash people
 that are attracted to that Marxist philosophy.

 It's true - we don't know how to scroll or link or vote,
 but maybe that's the price we pay for having a heart.

 If it were not for ignorant immigrants, criminals, and anti-social misfits
 the democrats would never be elected to any political office.

 Biggie, I believe the facts are calling you a liar.

 No matter how you slice it, we won the last three popular votes.
 The last time you guys won was with Bush the Smarter, who was
 called "a Clinton clone" for four years. If you have any respect for Rush,
 that means our side won the last four popular votes in a row.

 Today's Banana Fact:
 The average American eats 28 pounds of bananas each year.

 How many do you eat, Biggie?

Garry Trudeau offers $10K to anyone
who saw Bush show up in the ANG

Click for reward details



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 Copyright © 2004, bartcop.com

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 If your GOP workplace doesn't want you to see the truth, use these mirrors.

This is the central scrutinizer...
 BCR Show 35 was Bart's first confrontation with
Homeland Security. Naturally, we were easy on him.
One of our friendly counselors gave him
a do-nut...and told him to stick closer
to church-oriented social activities.


   Shirley Manson of the rock group "Garbage."

 Shrl, call  The BartPhone, just to say "Hi!"
 Plus, leave an e-mail address and I'll make you a BartCop Member - for free!

 You can call the Bart-Phone at 918-748-1714
 That would be really cool, and we'll catch you at The Joint on your next American tour.

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