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Quote of the Day
"I don't regret the vote. I regret how the
Click and see what these guys do
"He is speaking to these people as though they
are contributors to his campaign.
This is the thing that is admirable. I love this. I got to tell you, I love Bush because he doesn't care."
--Rush the vulgar Pigboy, on Bush's speech to the Newspaper Editors in Washington, Attribution
"I'm a man of peace when I murder a country..."
Guerrillas and residents in Fallujah have "days, not weeks" to turn in heavy weapons,
the top Marine commander in Iraq said Thursday, warning that fighting could resume
and that a U.S. push to take the city could be costly for both sides.
The stark warning by Lt. Gen. James Conway
came two days after an agreement was reached
in which city leaders called on insurgents to hand over their heavy weapons in return for a U.S.
pledge to hold back on plans to storm the city and allow the return of families that fled the city.
Marines have said few weapons have been
turned in and that most that were surrendered were old or didn't work.
problem with being stuck in a quagmire - the bluff doesn't work.
We're on the offensive in a place we know nothing about.
All they gotta do is hide and pick off marine after marine.
This isn't working. There are 25 million
They're willing to die to save their town, their country.
Wait - why are we dying in Iraq?
Care to comment?
"We've got to be strong and resolute and determined.
We will never show
weakness in the face of these people who have no soul, who have no conscience,
who care less about the life of a man or a woman or a child.
--Dubya, who has killed more innocent people in the last year than all terrorists combined, Attribution
Deleted Rumsfeld Comment
Covering up the crimes of the Sec of Defense?
The Pentagon deleted from a public transcript a statement Rumsfeld made to Bob Woodward
suggesting that the administration gave Saudi Arabia a two-month heads-up that Bush had decided
to invade Iraq and illegally steal their assets and their oil.
At issue was a passage in Woodward's "Plan
of Attack," an account published this week of Bush's
decision making about the war, quoting Rumsfeld as telling Prince Bandar bin Sultan, the Saudi ambassador
to Washington, in January 2003 that he could "take that to the bank" that the invasion would happen.
Yet the whole time, Bush was telling America he hadn't yet made
up his mind.
We know he was lying because he decided to invade Iraq before he took office.
Why is it wrong to lie to us about a blow job but OK to lie us into an illegal war that's killed 700?
Care to comment?
Get your 'No
mousepads, coffee mugs and shirts
"The lesson, too, is that if it is worth fighting
for, you had better be prepared to win.
Also, there must be a political game plan that will permit the withdrawal of our forces
- something that is still completely absent in Kosovo. The military is not a civilian police force.
It is not a political referee. And it is most certainly not designed to build a civilian society.
Using the American armed forces as the world's "911" will degrade capabilities, bog soldiers down
in peacekeeping roles, and fuel concern among other great powers that the United States has decided
to enforce notions of "limited sovereignty" worldwide in the name of humanitarianism."
--Condi Rice, lecturing the world on quagmires in January 2000 Attribution(via) http://atrios.blogspot.com/
Quagmires is bad
Subject: Negroponte, beloved supplier of arms to Iran...
Another marriage made in some dark,
repiglican sub-dimension, where the guy who,
as Ambassador to Honduras, helped the Nicaraguan Death-Squadders spend some
of that illicit loot Reagan and Bush 1 earned by selling arms to Iran, (for the killing of Iraqis)
is gonna represent the US of A to the happy citizens of an all-new, way-free Iraq.
Care to comment?
He is, apparently, immune. He is perfect and flawless and without the slightest taint of guilt or error, and, despite
looking like a bowl of Jell-O salad in a universe of divine tiramisu, he is, apparently, an angel of purity and light. It's true.
For here is Dubya, mumbling his way through
another shockingly insulting news conference just recently, screwing up
both his face and his intelligence data (again) and still a-huntin' for nonexistent WMDs in Iraqi turkey farms (?) as reporter
after reporter asks him, point blank, why he won't simply come clean.
Care to comment?
by Gene Lyons
Following President Bush's stunningly incoherent press conference, his media acolytes
reintroduced one of their most useful fictions: the decadent, blue-state "Beltway elite"
vs. salt of-the-earth, red-state "real Americans." Based upon TV electoral maps that
colored Al Gore states in 2000 blue, Bush states red, it's a theme GOP imagineers have
exploited since Newt Gingrich pronounced Democrats "enemies of normal Americans."
Even his admirers had to notice that Bush had no answer for the deeply embarrassing
question of why he can't testify before the 9/11 Commission without Dick Cheney
holding his hand. In the Weekly Standard, however, Fred Barnes invoked geography.
The president's real audience, see, "is outside the Beltway-the mass - and he does
surprisingly well in appealing to it. How does he do it? By being plain spoken and
amiable and down to earth. By sounding more like Midland, Texas, than like
Georgetown or Chevy Chase."
Subject: cardinals home opener
Hey Bart, I am a long time reader
of your page and wanted to let you know about
a friend of mine's experience at the Cardinal game when the chimp threw out the first pitch.
I asked her if she booed when bush came
out and she said she did. Well, I had to laugh
because I know she comes from a long line of repugs. What she told me next was not so funny.
She said the man sitting next to her was
crying, she said "dude are you ok"?,
He said "That son of a bitch killed 2 of my brothers in Iraq."
He was yelling and screaming at bush when
he came out.
I know it sounds hard to believe but I do believe it.
They are counting on us to not believe how horrible this war has become.
No wonder they piped in applause.
Care to comment?
Subject: Dude, WTF?
Let's just take one issue from your idiotic
Let's say that Rush Limbaugh is diabolical... umm, that's evil to you...
I'll stick to small words from now on.
Let's just say Rush is evil.
OK, that would make you Satan.
You're site is ten times worse than how
most liberals characterize Limbaugh's show.
Hello Pot! Meet Kettle!
email me when you get a clue.. K?
Dude, if you had me in a live chat room,
I'll bet you could tear me apart - limb by limb.
How's Friday night at 9 PM CST?
Go here and click on "Bartcop Chat" in the upper right corner.
Please understand that I'll be nervous, because you sound like
I don't have much experience at this, so be gentle, OK?
See you tomorrow night.
Promise to go easy on me?
Kill 68 in Southern Iraq
But we all agree Bush is doing a great job in Iraq
Republic to Pull Out of Iraq
But the American press says the coalition of the blackmailed is still strong
Race to Fix Serious Internet Flaw
Paul Watson says he can crash the internet worldwide
in deep trouble; U.S. must help, panel says
But Bush and Rush say the ocean cleans itself, so why bother?
Killed in Saudi Car Bomb Explosions
What a great war president he is, too
Click for more
the torturer's friend
saw it on smirkingchimp.com
"The embassy was aware of numerous kidnappings of leftists." It also said that Negroponte
played an active role in whitewashing human rights abuses.
"Specific examples of brutality by the Honduran
military typically never appeared in the human
rights reports, prepared by the embassy under the direct supervision of Ambassador Negroponte,"
the paper wrote. " The reports from Honduras were carefully crafted to leave the impression that
the Honduran military respected human rights."
So this is the man who is going to show the Iraqis the way toward democracy?
Subject: what a babe
It's hard to find a woman as pretty as Susan
McDougal who has the balls not to be pushed around by Ken Starr.
I applaud her, and Bart, your behaviour around such a beautiful woman was quite commendable as well.
I would have proposed to her on the spot.
I'm a happily married man...
Ask her to go to Marty's E-Page and read
Jazz From Hills, and if she likes the essay, tell her
to reach me at trimmedbush.blogspot.com and we'll go to dinner here in Santa Fe!!!!
LOLO.....Good job, ladies and gents....keep
Care to comment? Now with working link!
saw it on http://www.izzyguaal.com
a Flip-Flop Actually Makes Sense
by Joe Conason
At long last, George W. Bush is beginning to behave more like a politician than a zealot. After months and years of
ill-concealed hostility to the United Nations, he now turns to the international civil servants in Turtle Bay to save his
mission in Iraq from catastrophe. United Nations envoy Lakhdar Brahimi has been "tasked" to clean up the administration's
political wreckage and avert chaos after June 30, when sovereignty will supposedly revert to the Iraqi people.
In another signal of the importance suddenly
accorded to international institutions by the White House, the President
also nominated U.N. Ambassador John Negroponte to serve as ambassador to the new Iraq. Mr. Negroponte, one of
the nation's most experienced diplomats, was notably unenthusiastic about the drive to war last year, even while he
dutifully carried out the President's reckless policies.
Care to comment?
Subject: Now you've got me
You have finally convinced me I must subscribe...even
though neither my husband or I are employed.
It was that bit about how if only 1% of your readers subscribed you could advertise that tipped me over the edge...
I have been reading you regularly for a
year and have grown increasingly fond of you...so fond that I was afraid
to listen to your radio show for fear I wouldn't like your voice. It took a long time for me work up the courage to
listen to a sample, lucky for me you have a great voice.
One of the other reasons I subscribed is
your take on "the invisible cloud being". I get soooo tired of religon.
It wouldn't be so bad if people could keep it to themselves, but they have to convince everyone that their way is only way.
Paula Poundstone does a bit I like about how atheists have no imperative to convert. You'll never open your door to an atheist
saying "I am here to tell you there is no word and please accept this complimentary blank book". After 9/11 I took some flak
for refusing to join the chorus proclaiming Islam a peaceful religion. I won't say Christianity is a peaceful religion either...
Thank you for fighting the good fight, keep
swinging the hammer.
I love you.
"I glance at the headlines just to kind of
a flavor for what's moving.
I rarely read the stories, and get briefed by people who are probably read the news themselves."
-pResident George W. Bush, no Attribution
Jury Indicts Michael Jackson
This is news even tho they could indict a ham sandwich?
Several newspapers and television networks cited unidentified sources saying the
Santa Barbara County grand jury had indicted Jackson. None of the reports included
details about the indictments, and there was no official confirmation or announcement.
I imagine that the sheriff with the woody for Michael Jackson
and I have no idea if he'd guilty or innocent because I wasn't there,
but why the hell don't they bring this to trial and get it over with?
I think, like impeachment, there's money to be made with this,
so they're going to drag this out
for as many dollars as the story's worth. Guilty or not, can't we make this story go away?
Trust me, this will be the biggest story of 2006 or 2007 and we'll
all have to suffer thru it till then.
This isn't about child abuse or getting justice - this is about the press making money - again.
Care to comment? Now with working link!
Subject: Susan McDougal
This is a fabulous book!
The trials that Susan went through were mind-boggling,
yet she met them with absolute integrity and honor.
What a fantastic heroine Susan was and is!
Excerpts from Susan's 4/17 speech is in Show 36 - which should be up tonight.
Hey, how about a sneak peak?
Check this - Susan explains why Ol' Bart thinks Scott Peterson deserves a fair trial.
This is spooky, she says what I've been saying about Peterson all these months.
Marty's Entertainment Page
"One of Suskind's most severe critiques of
Bush was not only Bush's lack of press conferences
but also his management of those conferences. For each press conference, the White House
press secretary asks the reporters for their questions, selects six or seven of the questions to
answer and those reporters are the only ones called upon to ask their questions during the press
conference, Suskind said. This system makes it so that the president has answers already prepared
for questions that he knows will be asked, Suskind said.
--Zach Fox, Attribution
You mean The Monkey had the questions in advance?
And he was whining about ideas popping into his head with no notice?
The Monster can't even answer scripted questions?
Subject: Show 35
# 35 was the best yet, you had my whole family in stitches with the turkey farm bit.
Hope your credit card thief ends up behind bars too, maybe
George and c.c. boy could be cell mates. keep up the good work.
Subject: Show 35 nailed the emporer - exactly
I just listened to #35 and I am so glad
you took that phoney 'news conference' apart.
Sometimes I think I am alone in this world listening to the man the Supremes gave us
(and trying not to bite my tongue off and poking out my eye...).
I can only hope that some people who listened
to our War President may change their mind
about voting in November. Thank you for putting into words what many of us 'out here' feel.
Hope soon you can get on Air America or
somewhere so the ignorant masses can hear the truth!
Subject: BCR Show 35 was great
Hey from Kai,
That show #35 proves you got what it takes.
I had my doubts but you proved me wrong.
The mixing, the music, the editing, the commentary.
All perfect. It's the best ever. So effing perfect.
You had me peeing down my leg :) You need to get syndication.
However there is one little problem and
it's your pronunciation of Chinaco Añejo.
It's not Chinaco "A Nay Ho." It's Chinaco "An Yay Ho."
See the little tilde above the "n." The little squiggly thingy?
It's called an "enyay" if I remember my high school Spanish correctly.
But after a couple shots who the heck cares?
Keep up the fight and the swingin' of the hammer.
Kai, thanks for that.
The thing is, "An Yay Ho," takes too long to say and I'm a busy guy.
Care to comment?
Now with working link!
Do they pay you to try and keep us in the box?
I'm not sure what that means, if anything,
but nobody is paying me besides the subscribers.
What box are you in that you can't get out of?
You're transparent as hell.
That sounds like you're about to launch an argument against me.
I'm really looking forward to this. I enjoy a good tangle.
Be sure and give me your arrested development
Damn, I thought we were going to tangle, but then you turned all
pussy on me.
Do you have any friends with balls who might take me on?
I enjoy a good tangle.
Political Conversation: Condi's Slip
At a recent dinner party hosted by New York Times D.C. bureau chief Philip Taubman and his wife,
Times reporter Felicity Barringer, and attended by Arthur Sulzberger Jr., Maureen Dowd, Steven Weisman,
and Elisabeth Bumiller, Rice was reportedly overheard saying, "As I was telling my husb - " and then stopping
herself abruptly, before saying, "As I was telling President Bush...."
Jaws dropped, but a guest says the slip
by the unmarried politician, who spends weekends with the president
and his wife, seemed more psychologically telling than incriminating. Nobody thinks Bush and Rice are actually an item.
A National Security Council spokesman laughed and said, "No comment."
An excerpt from Show 35
for a quick taste
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Backer of U.S. Became Its Victim
Journalist slain with his driver by troops had supported occupation.
Reaction to his death shows moderates losing faith in Americans.
"I could hear the bullets hitting my colleagues' bodies over and over," Kamel said. "It was a terrible sound."..
Kamel asserted that they were fired on without
provocation. But Kimmitt said the press vehicle failed to yield
to warning shots after the occupants were observed filming "Iraqi Civil Defense Corps and Iraqi police checkpoints,
a coalition base, and routes to and from these locations." He said five signs in the area clearly prohibited filming or stopping near the base.
Kamel, however, said the Al Iraqiya reporters
did not film the base. Their car was in motion and they were not filming
anything when the firing began, he said. The experience has hardened his attitude toward the occupiers.
"I told Asaad he was too trusting of the Americans," Kamel said. 'But he always believed in them.'"
Click to Enter
Subject: Diverting money from Afghanistan while Osama slips away
I haven't heard anybody comment on this,
but aside fom all the other stinky aspects
of the diversion of Afghan War money to prepare for the illegal Iraq Attack, how about
the fact that the diversion began just weeks after Osamma slipped out from between
the "hammer and the anvil" at Tora Bora?
In other words, at a time when the country
thinks our guys are in hot pursuit of evil doer number one,
the Secretary of "Defense" is illegally removing financial resources from the hunt.
Neal, Osama is the Monkey's good luck charm.
The Monkey needs Osama to win in November.
Osama gave him a 90 percent approval rating and
Bush made Osama the Number One Muslim in the world.
They are a team - and always have been.
We have a new address for advertisers - firstname.lastname@example.org
Got a business or a web site that needs more clicks?
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Make your deal today before May 1, when convention prices take effect.
by MoDo the Dragon Lady - she hates everybody - this time it's Smirk
"Not since Jane Goodall lived with chimps in Tanzania has there been such a vivid study of
the nonverbal patterns of primates engaged in a dominance display. Bob Woodward's new
book, "Plan of Attack," reveals that President Bush decided to go to war based mostly,
believe it or not, on body language.
Like his father, Mr. Bush prefers more elemental
means of self-expression than the verbal.
(Not long before the first gulf war, Bush senior's masseuse told a client that the president's neck
was so tight, she assumed we were going to war.) The younger Bush, suspicious of Clintonesque
dialectical fevers and interminable analyses, did not bother to ask most of his top advisers what
they thought. The less Dick Cheney talked, the more power Mr. Bush entrusted in him.
Like the silent, cool-hand cowboy he aspires
to be, who would shoot a man just because he
didn't like the way the varmint was looking at him, the president preferred doing gut checks,
visually sizing up advisers and Saddam, rather than dwelling on pesky facts."
soldier body count in Iraq
April 1, 2004 - 600dead American soldiers.
April 22, 2004 - 706 dead American soldiers.
That's 106 dead brave soldiers in three weeks.
Things aren't getting better - they're getting worse.
This plane gets more full every day.
Hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of coffins
Judge: Back off from medical pot group
"A judge on Wednesday ordered the federal government to keep away from a California medical
marijuana group that grows and distributes cannabis for its sick members. The decision from U.S.
District Judge Jeremy Fogel in San Jose was the first interpretation of a federal appeals court
decision here last year that ordered the federal government not to prosecute a sick Oakland
woman who smoked marijuana with a doctor's recommendation"
Sanity about God's flowers?
That's unheard of...
Care to comment? Now with working link!
Subject: Holiday Inn Express crooks
Enjoyed show # 35.
In order to prevail over Holiday Inn, you will need to show that they were negligent
in hiring the youthful offender, as in they didn't check his background, etc.
Simply having an employee commit a criminal act is generally not enough.
It was not within the scope of his employment.
TJ, this is a poker bluff thing.
I'll threaten to tell the world that HI employs crooked people
who will copy your credit card and then steal from you.
My threat to drag them into small claims court (good up to $4500),
which will surely make the St Louis newspapers, should be enough.
I mean, who wants to stay in a place where the employees rob you?
Saying, "I sue people for a living" is a scary sentence, especially for the guilty.
Plus, I did have actual damages. EVERY monthly bill I have runs
thru that card,
and re-submitting a new card number to ALL those places is a big demand on a busy guy like me.
I'm going to ask for $2500, but I'll settle for ten nights at
HI around the country.
That'll be a good fit with my free SW Airlines flights :)
...everybody should learn to play poker.
The St Louis cops just called, the purp is in custody.
"What are you in for?"
"Murder and bank robbery - how about you?"
"I stole $60 worth of pizza from BartCop."
"What's a BartCop?"
Do you have an opinion?
Do any GOP impressions?
Then listen for your call on...
You have two minutes to spit your bit.
I know that sounds crazy, but I'll be damned
if we let free airline tickets expire.
We've never been to Florida, so we're going to fly in and spend a few days there,
so the exact date is flexible, so let's shoot for Palm Beach, the evening of Monday the 26th.
Here if you're in for cheap poker and please put 'poker'
in the title, OK?
If you're in, I have to know soon.
Time is running out...the game is in five days.
Contact Bart - if you're a poker player near Palm Beach
Subject: O'Franken O'Disaster
Leave it to that moron Franken to be involved in a fiasco.
I haven't heard about the O'Franken O'Fiasco.
The Democrats are the bottom of the barrel.
They can't do anything right with the trash people
that are attracted to that Marxist philosophy.
It's true - we don't know how to scroll
or link or vote,
but maybe that's the price we pay for having a heart.
If it were not for ignorant immigrants,
criminals, and anti-social misfits
the democrats would never be elected to any political office.
Biggie, I believe the facts are calling you a liar.
No matter how you slice it, we won the last three popular votes.
The last time you guys won was with Bush the Smarter, who was
called "a Clinton clone" for four years. If you have any respect for Rush,
that means our side won the last four popular votes in a row.
The average American eats 28 pounds of bananas each year.
How many do you eat, Biggie?
offers $10K to anyone
who saw Bush show up in the ANG
Click for reward details
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Betty Bowers & more Eric Alterman Carville Jim Hatfield Richard Clarke John Dean
Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
Copyright © 2004, bartcop.com
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If your GOP workplace doesn't want you to
see the truth, use these mirrors.
Shirley Manson of the rock group "Garbage."
Shrl, call The BartPhone,
just to say "Hi!"
Plus, leave an e-mail address and I'll make you a BartCop Member - for free!
You can call the Bart-Phone at 918-748-1714
That would be really cool, and we'll catch you at The Joint on your next American tour.
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