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Volume 1112 - Monsters begetting Monsters

A resource for non-embedded writers and an enlightened public

Please visit our newest sponsor

 Monday    July 14, 2003 

 Dueling Quotes

"In my first five seconds as president, I would fire John Ashcroft as attorney general,"
      -- Dick Gephardt

"We can not allow people like John Ashcroft to take away our rights and our freedoms,"
     --  John Edwards

"When I am president, there will be no John Ashcroft trampling on the Bill of Rights."
      -- John Kerry

 Hey guys, that's all well and good, but where the hell were you when Ashcroft was being confirmed?
 Why the hell didn't you speak up when a majority of the voters begged you to speak up?

 "I will not allow the Frankenstein monster in my daughter's bedroom a second time!"

 Why the hell did you let him in the first damn time?
 Where have you been for the last 2 years?

 CIA Got Uranium Reference Cut in Oct.
  Why Bush sited it in January is as clear as Lake Concha

  Click  Here

"Another senior official with knowledge of the intelligence said the CIA had doubts about the accuracy
 of the documents underlying the allegation, which months later turned out to be forged.

 The new disclosure suggests how eager the White House was in January to make Iraq's nuclear program
 a part of its case against Saddam Hussein even in the face of earlier objections by its own CIA director.
 It also appears to raise questions about the administration's explanation of how the faulty allegations
 were included in the State of the Union speech.

 Pundit Pap 
  saw it on

  Click  Here

 If a sitting president can wipe the slate clean at a time when he was trying to convince the American people that
 invading Iraq was in our national security interests and misleading the country into a war in which our men and
 women as well as thousands of Iraqi civilians would die, certainly an admission of having sex should put an end
 to the diatribe that still fills the AM dial.   It seems like the entire administration is in lockstep over this little "oversight."

 Donald Rumsfeld testified in front of a congressional hearing last week saying that he just found out about the
 Niger report being false in the last couple days. And he said it with a straight face.

 Is Saturday Night Live alum Jon Lovitz running this administration?

"Yeah, I, uh, didn't know about the forgery until just this week. I, uh, was out of the office and forgot to read
 any CIA reports or newspapers over the past year.

"Yeah, that's the ticket."


"The tragic failure of the administration's efforts to build international support before
  launching its impatient rush toward war against Iraq is now bearing its bitter, bitter fruit."
       --Sen. Robert Byrd, who finally stopped yelling at Clinton  Attribution

 National House of Waffles
   by Modo the Dragon Lady

  Click  Here

 The president and Condi Rice can shuffle the shells and blame George Tenet, but it smells of mendacity.
 Mr. Clinton indulged in casuistry to hide personal weakness. The Bush team indulges in casuistry to perpetuate its image of political steel.

 Dissembling over peccadillos is pathetic. Dissembling over pre-emptive strikes is pathological, given over 200 Americans dead and
 1,000 wounded in Iraq, and untold numbers of dead Iraqis. Our troops are in "a shooting gallery," as Teddy Kennedy put it, and our
 spy agencies warn that we are on the cusp of a new round of attacks by Saddam snipers.

 Why does it always come to this in Washington? The people who ascend to power on the promise of doing things differently end up
 making the same unforced errors their predecessors did. Out of office, the Bush crowd mocked the Clinton propensity for stonewalling;
 in office, they have stonewalled the 9/11 families on the events that preceded the attacks, and the American public on how — and why
 — they maneuvered the nation into the Iraqi war.

 Their defensive crouch and obsession with secrecy are positively Nixonian.
 (But instead of John Dean and an aggressive media, they have Howard Dean and a cowed media.)

 Maureen, don't forget your personal lies helped elect this blood-thirsty madman.
 You could've told the truth back in the summer of 2000, but you knew you could make more money
 by fabricating that silly-ass, "Hillary's bridal shower" non-story to make Democrats look bad.
 You and Russert and Schieffer and FOX and CNN all promoted the Monster into the White House.

 Some of those dead are on you, Maureen.

 Letters to the editor

 Now that the United States has finally admitted that the "evidence" implicating Iraq in the potential production
 of nuclear weapons used in President Bush's January State of the Union address was wrong and based on
 forged documents, the U.S. government is caught in a lie.

 The CIA went to Niger to investigate these claims last fall and found them to be false. The CIA urged Bush
 not to use this information in his address. The false evidence was apparently irresistible, though, because it
 made such a good case for war.

 The U.S. soldier death toll in Iraq is at 143 and the Iraqi civilian casualty estimates are in the 6,000 to 7,000 range,
 conservatively. Rumsfeld just doubled the daily estimates of how much he thinks it will cost each day to occupy Iraq.

 The war is not over.
 The Bush administration should be.
 Visualize impeachment!

 Shanda T

Click to visit


"Bush has been missing in action in explaining to the American people why its important to stay in Iraq."
    --Sen. Joseph Biden, one of the worst Bush enablers on our (?) side      Attribution

 Bush's Data Dump
 He's hiding bad economic news. Here's how.

  Click  Here

"The Bush economic team has snuffed its own reports when they reach conclusions that don't match
 the administration's rosy scenarios. The administration deep-sixed a study commissioned by then
 Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neill that predicts huge budget deficits well into the future. As noted by
 the Financial Times in late May, this survey, which asserted that the baby-boom generation's future
 health care and retirement costs would swamp U.S. coffers, was dropped from a 2004 budget summary
 published in February 2003— at the same time the White House was campaigning for a tax-cut package
 that critics warned would greatly expand future deficits. "The study's [analysis of future deficits] dwarfs
 previous estimates of the financial challenge facing Washington," wrote the FT. According to the FT,
 a Bush official said the study was merely a thought exercise.

 The crazy bastard has thrown away a generation worth of Social Security funds.
 In the near future,  America is going to wake up and realize the bank is broke,
 and we'll look back and say,  "But why didn't anybody warn us what Bush was doing?"

"My super-rich oil buddies needed a tax cut so they could create jobs..."

 Like Mother, Like Son
 Jonah Goldberg takes his ball and goes home

  Click  Here

"Now, for those who don’t know it–and my email shows that many do not – Goldberg is the son
 of the notorious, sleazoid web maven, Lucianne the Bat, the scheming literary agent who helped
 expose Bill Clinton’s sex life. If not for his mother’s standing among those on the right–and the
 favors she had stockpiled for being a tool of the anti-Clinton machine–Jonah would probably be
 punching data in a terminal somewhere, rather than sitting on talk shows as a pundit.

 I heard one internet rumor that Jonah's father is Lyndon Johnson.

 O'Reilly the Fascist

  Click  Here

“Cosmos Left believes FOX talk show host Bill O'Reilly has emerged as one of the most dangerous individuals in this country.
 There are other bourgeois pundits more personally obnoxious than O'Reilly--Hannity, Colter, Limbaugh--but none of these
 cretins pretends to be working class heroes. O'Reilly does claim to speak for workers, as fascist demagogues usually do."


“It’s very easy to pick one little flaw here or one little flaw there. The overall reason we went into Iraq
  was sound and morally sound. And it’s not just because somebody forged or made a mistake on whether
  Saddam Hussein was looking for nuclear material from Niger or whatever.”
     -- Tom DeLay,        Bush Charge Had Doubters

"I'm nuts about this war!

 Great (but too big to run) Doonesbury toon
 on why liberals are such losers.

  Click  Here


 Subject: Reference for "We're taking him out" and more...

 Hey Bart,

 Noticed on the members' page the letter from Henry asking for the setting where the Shrub
 said "Fuck Saddam, we're taking him out." Did a quick search and found a link for you to pass along:

 Also, while I'm at it, you might want to check this out:,3605,995252,00.html

 It's an interesting but long piece on how Americans are being manipulated by fear, but what I found
 most interesting in the piece is near the end of the article. They mention Annthrax Coulter's infamous
 remarks about killing their leaders and converting them to Christianity.

 Apparently the website of a militant Islamist group republished her comments as proof that America
 is out to get all Muslims. Read the article for their full rant. Interesting.

 Take care and keep hammering!
 Tina W.

 Tina, America IS out to get all Muslims

 Bush says he's getting his orders directly from God, himself.
 And God, in the Commandments, says "Thou shalt have no false Gods before me,"
 so if the Tinhorn Dictator is listening very hard, he'll probably hear God's selfish command
 that he murder all the false Gods" to be in compliance with his personal Invisible Cloud Being.

 Religion is the willful practice of insanity.

 Having a religiously insane man commanding America's military is very dangerous.

"Bart, are you sure?"

 What if God tells 'President' Pinhead that he's lost faith in the human race and wants it destoryed?
 What if God told Bush that Paul Wellstone was a problem that needs to be dealt with?

 Is Bush supposed to disregard what his personal Invisible Cloud Being tells him?
 Or will he fall in line like a Senate Democrat and follow the orders given to him?

 Have a question or a comment?

  Email Bart

 Trading on fear

  Click  Here

 Shortly after Coulter's column appeared, it resurfaced on the website of the Mujahideen Lashkar-e-Taiba - one of the
 largest militant Islamist groups in Pakistan - which works closely with al-Qaida. At the time, the Lashkar-e-Taiba site
 was decorated with an image that depicted a hairy, monstrous hand with claws in place of fingernails, from which blood
 dripped on to a burning globe of planet earth. A star of David decorated the wrist of the hairy hand, and behind it stood
 an American flag. The reproduction of Coulter's column used bold, red letters to highlight the sentence that said to
 "invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity".

 To make the point even stronger, the webmaster added a comment: "We told you so. Is anyone listening out there?
 The noose is already around our necks. The preparation for genocide of ALL Muslims has begun ... The media is now
 doing its groundwork to create more hostility towards Islam and Muslims to the point that no one will oppose this mass
 murder which is about to take place. Mosques will be shut down, schools will be closed, Muslims will be arrested,
 and executed. There may even be special awards set up to kill Muslims. Millions and millions will be slaughtered like sheep.
 Remember these words because it is coming. The only safe refuge you have is Allah."

 So, we have a monkey president, who spoke of "this crusade," and begged the enemy to "bring 'em on" after did his
 cock-of-the-walk strut on the deck on the Lincoln. Then add the "Kill them all" comments from Bush's good friend
 Ann Coulter and you've got a real mess on your hands - a mess a smarter president would - and did - avoid.
 Anybody got a match?

 Subject: Roll out the new product

 Bush's job performance ratings are falling, as they have every summer.
 Look for a "new product rollout" in September -- and I'm afraid a lot of people
 will have to die to get those numbers back up.


Excuse me, but the two lies are not the same.

Lie number one:
was none of our damn business
didn't cost us a single penny
got nobody hurt or killed
(Unless you count what Ken Starr did to Jim McDougal)

Lie number Two:
is certainly our business
has cost us $100 billion so far
has killed 200 of our bravest soldiers
has killed thousands of innocent Iraqi's

...the two lies are not the same.

It is asinine to suggest they are equal.


 Bush stands by CIA after Iraq Mistake

 That's a headline on
 I can't even bring myself to read it. I need one of those buckets.

 On Friday, Bill Oh-really was playing fair and balanced calling for a comment by the
 "president" about the "lie." I wonder what time Karl Rove called Bill to let him know
 it would be great to start talking tough before Bush could clear his name. Bravo!


 The Tulsa CBS alffiliate interviewed a local soldier Sunday.
 He said his unit lost 18 men.

 Eighteen friends of his are dead because Bush told some lies to steal some oil.

 I wonder if he's going to vote for the man whose lies got those men killed?

Marty's E! page
'Bon 14 Juillet' for Bastille Day
Baron Dave Romm on Salem bin Laden
Jon Stewart on 'NOW With Bill Moyers'
Ari Fleischer got hosed
Playboy's 50th anniversary
The 'Gandhi' Trust
Duran, Duran
Dave's back with Lisa Marie Presley
And, some more links


 Bush could be a one-termer 
   by Michael Kramer, NY Daily News

  Click  Here

 President Bush could lose the 2004 election.  Before now, I didn't think that was possible.
 Considering Bush's general popularity, political skills that dwarf his father's and the prospective
 Democratic alternatives, I thought Bush would win reelection - and probably easily.

 What's changed? The prospect for a major scandal involving the administration's arguments
 for going to war against Iraq and, specifically, the President's cavalier, even arrogant, responses
 to the charge that he and his aides distorted or exaggerated the intelligence on which the case
 for battle rested.

 This story, only now unfolding, is getting uglier every day.

 Sunday morning, we watched "The Corbomite Manuever," Star Trek where
 Spock explains, "Not chess, Mr. Spock - poker!" because they had to bluff
 Richie Cunningham's little brother into backing away from their ship.

 Bart, would you please run this for a few days?

 The California Secretary of State has extended the deadline for public comment on electronic voting machines issues
 until the end of July. If they do this right, California may be able to set a standard the rest of the country will follow,
 so even if you are not a California resident, your input will still be important.

 Submit your comments:   Write to:

 Secretary of State Kevin Shelley
 Attn: Touch Screen Report
 1500 11th Street
 Sacramento, CA 95814

 Send email to:

 Fax comments to:  (916) 653-9675


 "Intelligence gathered by this and other governments leaves no doubt that the Iraq regime
   continues to possess and conceal some of the most lethal weapons ever devised."
       -- George W. Bush, March 17, 2003.

 He lied when he said he hadn't made up his mind about going to war.
 50 Americans soldiers dead.

 He lied about the Niger-Uranium deal that never happened.
 100 American soldiers dead

 Colin Powell said, "I'm not reading this - this is bullshit."
 150 American soldeirs dead

 Rummy lied when he said he knew exactly where the WMDs were, near Baghdad and Tikrit.
 200 Americans dead

 Noq they're saying we might be there as long as four more years.
 800 Americans dead

 When a Republican lies, multiply it by three if you want a more accurate estimate.
 2400 American soldiers dead

 His own generals told him not to go into Iraq.
 The UN told him not to go is, as did every one of our allies excepy Tony the Discredited.
 His own father, and his father's National Security Advisor Brent Snowcroft told him not to go alone.

 But this is what happens when animal-torturing, spoiled little boy never have in a fair fight their whole lives.
 Bush hasn't the slightest clue about how the world works - daddy always did everything for him.
 He's not capable of comprehending what "consequences" are because he's never had to face any.

 Who will they hold responsible for Bush's latest set of deadly lies?

"This is Clinton's fault. I'm a trustworthy oil man.

Australian award winning author of "Schindlers Ark," Thomas Keneally

 Changing the tune in Washington/California
   by John H

  Click  Here

 Bush said again and again during the 2000 campaign that he was going to "change the tone in Washington."
 Perhaps it was simply one of his verbal flubs. Maybe he meant to say he'd change the TUNE in Washington,
 again and again and again and again. We weren't going to engage in nation-building in a Bush presidency.
 Now we're just crazy about nation-building. We were going to get Bin Laden dead or alive. Now he's not
 all that important. We were going to march on Iraq to disarm it. Now we're there to liberate the Iraqi people.

 The only thing that changed was when Bush was sworn in, the GOP stopped filing wild-ass lawsuits
 and holding hearings on fabricated "scandals" that never amounted to anything more than a blow job.

 The tone changed because the bastards stopped their constant attacks on an innocent man.

Say it with me, kids: L'Alpe d'Huez.
 It's a really big mountain and Lance is going to
demolish the field when he climbs the famed mountain.

There's also tons of baseball going on.
Check out the sports dish at BartCopSports!

And hey, drop me a line!
Tell me if I'm doing a good job or not.

Click to Enter

They've Stolen Our Country--And Its Time to Take It Back

  Click  Here to Order

 Even in the darkness of Hooverism, the Dust Bowl, Pinkerton-thugs, the Depression, and soup lines,
 Woody Guthrie found that people weren't sitting around moping, but were organizing and making plans
 about how "this old world could be fixed so's it would be twice as level and half as steep and take the
 knocks out of it, and grind the values, and tighten the rods, and take up the bearings, and put a boot in
 the casing ­ and make the whole trip a little bit smoother, and a little bit more like a trip instead of a trap."

"It has big words and it don't have no good pictures..."

'Boondocks' creator signs deal with Sony
 Aaron McGruder to do a Boondocks feature film and TV series.

  Click  Here

 20 lies about Bush's war
  It had to come from overseas - our press won't print the truth.

  Click  Here

  1.Iraq was responsible for the 11 September attacks
  2 Iraq and al-Qa'ida were working together
  3 Iraq was seeking uranium from Africa for a "reconstituted" nuclear weapons programme
  4 Iraq was trying to import aluminium tubes to develop nuclear weapons
  5 Iraq still had vast stocks of chemical and biological weapons from the first Gulf War
  6 Iraq retained up to 20 missiles which could carry chemical or biological warheads,
     with a range which would threaten British forces in Cyprus
  7 Saddam Hussein had the wherewithal to develop smallpox
  8 US and British claims were supported by the inspectors
  9 Previous weapons inspections had failed
10 Iraq was obstructing the inspectors
11 Iraq could deploy its weapons of mass destruction in 45 minutes
12 The "dodgy dossier"
13 War would be easy
14 Umm Qasr
15 Basra rebellion
16 The "rescue" of Private Jessica Lynch
17 Troops would face chemical and biological weapons
18 Interrogation of scientists would yield the location of WMD
19 Iraq's oil money would go to Iraqis
20 WMD were found

 Poker fever

 We played poker Saturday night - it was a lot of fun!

 On just a few hours notice, Mick P showed up, Hozzer, Fritz, Joe Volcano, Madfeline and one other guy.
 Hey, I wonder if Al D'Amato would join us for a game :)

 We're going to play again Tuesday nite, 9 PM Central.
 Maybe we'll see you there?

 Bush mushroom cloud "Bring 'em on" shirts! exclusive!
Buy a shirt, support and show the world
that you know there's an illegal monkey in the White House.

 Life sentence given in toe-sucking case
  Dick Morris - call your office!

 The former supervisor of a Newport Beach youth program was sentenced Friday to life in prison
 on 25 counts of lewd conduct and assault for sucking the toes of 20 boys.

 Trenton Veches, 32, will be eligible for parole in 15 years.

 During the trial, the defense lawyer said Veches' actions with boys 6 to 10 years old were "horseplay."
 But the prosecutor said Veches "clearly befriended these children, manipulated them and he sexually molested them."

 Veches was arrested in April 2002 after a co-worker reported seeing him sucking a boy's toes.

 I'm no expert, but how can you sexually molest a boy below the ankle?

July BartCop Radio Special!!

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 Origin of Bush's famous "F-Saddam," comments

  Click  Here

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 Read the  Previous Issue

 It had  everything.

 Copyright © 2003,

   Held over - it's a great picture!

 Shirley - call The BartPhone,  just to say "Hi!"
 Maybe leave a two-minute message...
 I'll play it for your fans at
 Maybe say some nasty things about fascist, sex-starved Bush.
 Shirley, as far as I know, our politics are identical.

Bush is a horrid madman and a savage killer.
He's a stupid criminal and a greedy, blood-loving bastard.

 Plus, leave an e-mail address and I'll make you a BartCop Member - for free!

 Call the Bart-Phone at 918-493-1500
 That would be really cool,
 and I'll catch you at the Vegas Hard Rock on your next American tour.  and BartCop are trademarks of quality humor.
 Same for "ditto-monkey," "scum-sucking Republican bastards" and Gov Bush (R-Racist monkey)

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