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  In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Iraq Wants Saddam Back
Scapegoat - the Lady General
Enron Gouged Customers
D-r-i-v-e   b-y   N-e-w-
Chicago Pokerfest is On
While Reagan Napped
Could jets have stopped 9/11?
Low Bidders in Iraq
DeLay's Ethics Complaint


Quote of the Day

"You might be a right wing republican if...
  you think it's OK for Nancy Reagan to 
  practice astrology but John Kerry 
  shouldn't receive communion."  
     --Lisa Casey,   AllHatNoCattle

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Volume 1335 - Eager to Torture


  Tuesday    June 15, 2004


"When courts extend constitutional prohibitions beyond their previously recognized limit,
  they may restrict democratic choices made by public bodies."
      --Rehnquist, who sided with the conservative majority in Bush v. Gore, explaining why
         he couldn't rule in favor of Newdow's "under God" challenge in the Pledge  Attribution

  It seems like every time they issue a new ruling they prove once again how biased
  they were in 2000 when they took the decision away from the voters.

 Iraq Wants Saddam by End of the Month
  They're acting like they're autonomous - but are they?

  Click  Here

 The new Iraqi government wants custody of Saddam and all other prisoners by the time
 sovereignty is handed over at the end of this month, the interim prime minister said.

"All the detainees will be transferred to the Iraqi authorities within the two coming weeks,"
 Allawi said. "Saddam and the others will be delivered to the Iraqis."

 Bush can't let this happen. If Saddam takes the witness stand and tells what he knows about
 Reagan, Bush, Rummy and Cheney selling him poison gas and WMDs, their reputations will
 be ruined and President Kerry might want them put on trial for a host of crimes.

  Care to comment?


"It's great to see Chelsea. The fact that you survived your teenage years
  in the White House speaks to the fact you had a great mom and dad."
     --Dubya, kissing Clinton ass at the White House yesterday,  Attribution

 Abu Ghraib General Says She's a Scapegoat
  How 'bout them cowboys!!

  Click  Here

 The American general who was in charge of Abu Ghraib claimed she was being made a scapegoat
 for the abuse of detainees, and said her successor once told her that prisoners should be treated "like dogs."
 A spokesman for Maj. Gen. Geoffrey Miller, accused of making the "like dogs" remark, categorically denied the charge.

 Brig. Gen. Janis Karpinski said Miller told her last autumn that prisoners "are like dogs, and if you allow them
 to believe at any point that they are more than a dog then you've lost control of them."

 Karpinski said that during a visit to Iraq, Miller - still the commander at the Gitmo -   spoke of wanting to
 "Gitmoize" Abu Ghraib by applying the Cuban facility's regimented detention and interrogation techniques.
"He talked about Gitmoizing in terms of what the (military police) were going to do; he was going to select
 the MPs, they were going to receive special training," she said.

 Well of course this female general is guilty.
 They can't blame it on the grunts because it was too widespread, too coordinated.
 And it can't be the fault of Bush/Rummy/Gonzales because they were sent here by God,
 so let's blame the lady because we all know women don't belong in the military anyway.

  Care to comment?

Click  to  Order

 Utility: Enron Gouged Western Customers
  All the time, Bush and Rush said, "It was the market"

  Click  Here

 Enron Corp.'s manipulation of energy markets gouged Western customers for at least $1.1 billion,
 according to audiotapes and documents released Monday by the same utility that uncovered tapes
 of traders laughing about cheating grandmothers on their electricity bills.

 U.S. Sen. Maria Cantwell, D-Wash., used the evidence to demand a new investigation by the
 Federal Energy Regulatory Commission. She said the agency's colossal failure to uncover Enron's
 schemes wound up hurting thousands of customers, and that FERC tried to keep the utility from
 getting access to Enron's tapes - because Bush and Cheney are in on the scam.

"When are you going to give justice to the individuals who have been hurt by this Enron market manipulation?"
 Cantwell asked. "If the federal oversight regulators aren't going to do their job, then they should get out of
 the way and quit obstructing justice."

 Why would Bush and Cheney help Enron cover up their crimes?
 There's only one possible explanation - to protect themselves from the law.
 Trust me - that $1.1B figure is waaaaaay low.
 Enron stole $500M in one day, and there had to be more days like that.

 Remember, again and again Bush was asked to intervene, but he refused
 because he said "This is the market at work," but he knew what was going on.
 If the Democrats had any balls they's start impeachment today - but they don't.

 Subject: BCR Show 42

 Great show and keep it up.  The progress is amazing.
 And I really like seeing that a regular schedule is forming - way to look!

 Bush is going to die the death of a thousand wounds.
 The shit is just piling up all around him - enjoying watching the bastard drown in it.

 Vive le Swing!



 Subject: October Surprise

 Hey Bart,

 I was driving home tonight and listening to a Reich-Wing crackpot on KSFO in San Francisco and he
 was going off about the fact that Bush was going to win in Ohio now because of the Ashcroft announcement
 about catching the suspected terrorist who wanted to blow up an unnamed mall somewhere in Ohio.

 This might be their strategy to "catch" a terrorist in each battleground state to swing the vote their direction.
 Ashcroft has done this a couple of times already this year. Released information about terrorists that are either
 dead or captive in another country to try to give his leader a boost in the election.

 Just my brain fart for the day about what the Reich will do to stay in power.

 Keep hammering...

 If you take away that one guy who looks like Ron Jeremy, have they caught anybody?
 (Saddam and Ootie and Kootie don't count - they didn't try to attack us)
 Each time they catch a guy, they always claim he was a "top guy," but are they?
 Plus, the American Taliban, Jose Padilla, that 20th hijacker guy Zaccariuri they caught
 - nobody has ever seen any evidence that they were guilty of anything, have we?

 The Bush administration has been caught in hundreds of lies, so why believe them
 when they say they caught "the dirty bomb guy" when he's not allowed to speak
 or have a lawyer or even go before a judge?

 And it goes without saying that Osama, Mullah Omar and that beheading nutjob in Baghdad
 are all running lose and killing poeple - so how can the BFEE claim any successes?
 Bush is running on his war record which could hardly be worse.
 The most positive thing anyone can say about them is they "only" had one 9-11.

  Care to comment?

Those of you who bought ads on  bartcop.com last week
were lucky because we set a new record for hits.

Ten, sometimes twenty views per penny.
Nobody gives you a better deal that that.


 All News is Good News
  When a Monkey misspeaks, who listens?

   Click  Here

"With his underlings giving him such uniformly favorable reviews, Bush, who has said his aides
 are the "most objective sources" of news, has begun to anticipate good news even before it occurs.
 Greeting the Algerian president last week, he remarked: 'That was a good meeting yesterday.
 We'll have a good meeting today.'"

 Subject: anti-semetic or just plain wrong?

  Click  Here


"Ronald Reagan has to be looking down from heaven and smiling
  at the way Bush, generally speaking, stands and the things he's doing,
  even though they might well disagree on some specifics."
    --Newt Gingrich, insulting Reagan by suggestion Bush is "another Reagan"   Attribution

A Child's ABCs of Terrorism


 Ready to begin the Chicago Pokerfest


 If you're in, you need to secure your seat with a $50 deposit.
 We can't do any drop-by players, so only those sign up in advance can play.
 Once you have paid the deposit, we will give you the location of the game.

 The most we can accomodate is 20 players, so if you want in - don't wait.
 Send your deposit to  bartcop@bartcop.com
 If you want to mail a check, do it right away but let me know.
 I'd hate for your check to arrive after we have 20 people confirmed.
 Note: The after party will be decided by how many people we have.
 We could have 6 people or we could have 60, so we can't plan until we know.
 If you have a question or need more details, write to Bart
 Sam will help corral the poker inquiries if you put "poker" in the subject line.

 Pokerfest Chicago July 17, with an afterparty at some agave bar?
 Pokerfest Seattle  circa late September, early October?

 While Reagan Napped
  Ronnie, Osama and the Chin defense by Greg Palast

  Click  Here

 Reagan politically fathered those rascally Rosemary's Babies of the Bush junta:
 Dick Cheney, Ronnie's appropriately titled Whip in Congress;
 Paul Wolfowitz, the kind of Dr. Strangelove that scares even Henry Kissinger;
 John Poindexter, convicted of abetting Contra terrorists while in the Reagan White House,
  later Bush's first Total Information Awareness chieftain;
 and Reagan Treasury Secretary James Baker, who tried his damnedest to bankrupt America for Ron,
 and now, from his Bush White House office, is doing the same for Iraq as "special advisor" to the conquered nation.

 But there can be no more dangerous creature to have burbled out of the Reagan Frankenstein factory
 than his Cold War comrade, Osama bin Laden.

"Osama is good people - we grew up together..."

  Care to comment?

 Travesty of Justice
   by Paul Krugman

  Click  Here

 No question: John Ashcroft is the worst attorney general in history.
 First, there's the absence of any major successful prosecutions.
 Note: Not true - they got Tommy Chong and Martha Stewart.

 Then there is the lack of any major captures. Somewhere, the anthrax terrorist is laughing.
 But the Justice Department, you'll be happy to know, is trying to determine whether it can file
 bioterrorism charges against a Buffalo art professor whose work includes harmless bacteria in petri dishes.

 Perhaps most telling is the way Mr. Ashcroft responds to criticism of his performance.
 His first move is always to withhold the evidence. Then he tries to change the subject
 by making a dramatic announcement of a terrorist threat.

"Krugman again?
 Take his clothes off,
 hood him and bring
 in the angry dogs."

 I guess it's just a coincidence that J-Lo and Marc Anthony got married
 the same weekend his new album was coming out, right?

 He's been on every morning show and every talk show you can think of
 and his refusal to admit he's married is just more fuel for the publicity fire.

 I guess we should blame the gays for ruining the sanctity of marriage.
 Why - they made Rush divorce his wife, those awful gays.

 Subject: Pokerfest Chicago

 Hi, Bartcop
 Just wondering if there was an age limit for the poker night.
 I'm 17, actively involved in politics and poker, and figured it'd be an excellent thing to check out.


 S, I don't know.
 Anybody got any comments, ideas or suggestions?

Marty's Entertainment Page

 Could Fighter Jets Have Stopped 9/11?
  The 9-11 panel wants to know, they claim

  Click  Here

 Still, two events would have been required for the Pentagon strike to have been averted.

 First, President Bush would have had to have ordered that any hijacked airliners be shot down;
 the military's rules of engagement did not allow for that without such presidential intercession.
 Bush ultimately did make that call, but only after the Pentagon was hit.

 Yes, he was busy reading that goat story to the kids instead of acting like a "war president,"
 and the American press just let's that little fact remain unspoken to protect never-elected Bush.

 Second, NORAD's F-16 Fighting Falcons at Langley Air Force Base, near Norfolk, Va.,
 would have had to have been launched sooner.    Why they weren't is unclear.


"Did you see the portrait of Bill Clinton when they unveiled it?
  Did you expect to see Monica Lewinsky in that portrait somewhere?"
    --the vulgar Pigboy, who can't live with a woman    Attribution

Some people can't read, like the Monkey president.
But if you can read, you'll find the right books here
and it's all just a click away.

 Man Held in Calif. Beheading, Slaying
  This kind of story is the egg in Matt Drudge's French Toast

  Click  Here

 Iran massing troops on Iraq border
  But we're not leaving until December 2005

  Click  Here

 No comfort in obeying bad law
   The law is whatever The Emporer says it is

  Click  Here

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"According to a search of the Nexis electronic database, looking for stories, columns or
  TV transcripts that contained at least six mentions of the former president during the
  week that followed his death on June 5, we found the Boston Globe ran 33 items, the
  Dallas Morning News made room for 50, the New York Times churned out 59, while the
  St. Louis Post-Dispatch ran 62, the Washington Times 65, the Chicago Tribune 71, and
  the Los Angeles Times 72. USA Today printed 88 items..The Washington Post..published
  approximately 108 items..National Public Radio aired 105 segments..the exact same number
  as Fox News..The NBC news family -- NBC, MSNBC, and CNBC..was able to squeeze in
  125 segments. But the Reagan title holder was clearly CNN, which somehow managed to
  produce 180 segments. Just imagine what the Reagan coverage would have looked like if
  the press didn't have a liberal bias."
       --Eric Boehlert,     Attribution

 It's time for Tiger to change stripes

  Click  Here


 Golf would be much better served if the real Woods showed his face
 Thursday and resumed his pursuit of history.

 Everyone loves the occasional upset, but let's face it: Dynasties make the games
 we play and watch far more interesting.  Given that the Lakers have no better chance
 of finding their touch than David Duval, Woods is the best hope of the week.

 So the new Tiger should go back to being the old Tiger, the one who wouldn't dream
 of playing the fool in a commercial spoofing Caddyshack. The one who wouldn't dream
 of spending his pre-Masters news conference regaling reporters with stories of tips he'd
 received (and used) from complete strangers who could barely break 70 on the front side.

 Why didn't Eldrick play in last week's Buick Open?
 Buick is one of his biggest advertisers, and he snubs their tournament?
 Can Eldrick finish in the top ten this weekend?  In the top twenty?

  Care to comment?


Click to Enter


"There are stem cells to do research on and ... we have to be really careful
  between what we want to do for science and what we should do ethically." 
      --Pickles Bush, telling Nancy Reagan to take a f-ing hike    Attribution

 Nation Builders and Low Bidders in Iraq

  Click  Here

"From the abuses at Abu Ghraib prison to the mutilation of American civilians at Falluja,
 many of the worst moments of the Iraqi occupation have involved private military contractors
"outsourced" by the Pentagon. With no public or Congressional oversight, the Pentagon has
 paid billions of dollars to companies that now have as many as 20,000 employees carrying out
 military functions ranging from logistics and troop training to convoy escort and interrogations.
 Yet despite the problems and the widespread accusations of overbilling, it appears the civilian
 leadership at the Pentagon has learned absolutely nothing from the whole experience."

 The criminals will continue to steal, kill and torture in our name until someone says "Stop!"
 Where are the Democrats?
 Why are they so afraid?
 Why do they refuse to stand up to the illegal bully?

 They've stolen/wasted trillions, they've murdered in our name and tarnished our once-great reputation
 but the Democrats are concentrating on which color tables cloths to have in Boston.

Bush's American soldier body count in Iraq

833  834 dead American soldiers.

Drip, drip, drip - the lives go down the drain - all for Bush's illegal war.

Soon it will be 900, and then 1000.


 Poker Talk

 Did you see that neanderthal Daniel Baldwin on Sunday's WPT Celebrity Poker?
 I've never seen such an obnoxious drunk at a poker table before.

 Non-stop, Bob Costas-type, machine gun chatter, using ugly and boorish language and drunk-bravado
 like I've never seen.   I know gamblers and poker players have a reputation, but poker can be a lot of fun
 when competing with other gentlemen., Baldwin was everything but a gentleman, and two of the six players
 were ladies which just made his low-class act that much harder to endure.

 Matter of fact, Ming Wa of ER and Jennifer Tilly of a hundred projects, were the last two standing.
 Ming won it all, and sent the all the men, thank Koresh Baldwin included) to the dressing room vanquished and defeated.
 (...recalling the financial beating I took for kidding about "women's poker)
 Also and better...

 Someone signed up with PartyPoker.com and mentioned BartCop as "referred by,"  and those nice PartyPoker people
 bought my way into a high dollar poker tournament.  If I win that big tournament, me and Mrs Bart will get to go on
 a poker cruise and if I win that, I'll be on The Travel Channel playing with the big boys.
 True, my chances of being elected President or Pope are better, but still, it's possible because poker is crazy.

 If you have no gambling problems,
 and you find excitement playing
 online poker at  PartyPoker.com
 mention BartCop as your referral
 and you could win a shout-out on
 The Travel Channel when I win.

 From: Bob Glaser, accuser

 Subject: Dear Lord of the Chimps

 According to your reply, I am "monkey" for objecting to Muslims carving a swastika in the face
 of a 12 year old French Jewish girl because she was asking for it by not emigrating to Tulsa.

 ha ha
 I think most monkeys, by now, would understand.
 What makes you a monkey is choosing to live with face carvers.

 Y'know, my cats move out of the sun when they get hot,
 but you can't move away from the swastika carvers?

 All right, Brain Death, since you are into flaunting your incomparable mental sloth,

 ha ha
 I could use a guy like you on my radio show - you ever do any radio?

 ...how does this domestic display of anti-Semitism strike you?

 The Berkeley Intifada?

  Click  Here

"It's the Jews, stupid," was scratched into a 9/11 memorial. The glass door to Berkeley's Hillel building
 was shattered by a hurled cinderblock. Just in case the message wasn't clear, someone wrote "F  JEWS"
 on the wall nearby. Swastikas were spray-painted on a campus building.

 How did it strike me?
 It's strikes me as violent and wrong.
 How'd it strike you?

 Are the Jewish students at Cal Berkeley also invited to pitch a tent on the front lawn of your palatial trailer park?

 IF Berkeley was a hotbed of swastika-carving crazies, I would not move there.

 Seriously, did you think you had me stumped?

Do you have an opinion?
Do any GOP impressions?

Call the 

Then  listen for your call on...

You have two minutes to record your message.

 DeLay to Be Subject of Ethics Complaint

  Click  Here

"A Democratic congressman plans to file a wide-ranging ethics complaint today against
 Tom DeLay (R-Squirrel), shattering the remnants of a seven-year-old, unwritten ethics
 truce between the two parties and possibly nudging the House back toward a brand of
 political warfare that helped topple two speakers.
 The complaint, which Rep. Chris Bell (D-Tex.) said he will send to the House ethics committee,
 accuses Delay of soliciting campaign contributions in return for legislative favors; laundering illegal
 campaign contributions through a Texas political action committee; and improperly involving a
 federal agency in a Texas partisan matter.  The House's top two Democrats raised no objections
 when Bell told them he would file the complaint, according to Bell's office and party leadership aides."

"They can't get me.
  I'm too fast for 'em."

 Wait - a Democrat is doing this?
 I'll bet that's a misprint - I'll bet that Bell guy is a Republican who's fed up with Delay.
 No way a Democrat would ever take a stand against Republican corruption.

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