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Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Quote of the Day
"Nobody wants to be the war president.
Click for details
"Mike Malloy is coming to Air America on August
His daily show will air M-F 10 PM to 1 AM Eastern Time."
-- rumors that I'm hearing
It's about time - Mike will be great on Air America.
'I Want to Be the Peace President'
The Monkey spoke - but did not ask for psychiatric help
After launching two wars and killing thousands, Bush says he wants to be a "peace president"
and took swipes at his Democratic rivals for being lawyers and weak on defense.
"FOX and CNN will back me up - yeah, I can sell this..."
"Liberals arrogantly have ruled the news media
roost for decades, regularly demeaning
conservative ideas and leaders in their ongoing quest for progress and enlightenment.
But now that Fox News Channel is on the scene, dominating the cable news scene and showing
America that TV news can be something different than the suffocating consensus of the liberal
establishment, the Left is in a panic. Objectivity is needed! Democracy itself is in danger!"
--Brent Bozell, famous right-wing handjob Attribution
Isn't it odd how they brag they dominate cable TV and talk radio,
but then they whine
that the dominant-media-liberal- elite control everything and they can't get their message out.
Requests Return of UN Inspectors
That Bush pulled out when his war hardon was throbbing
Iraq has asked the UN nuclear watchdog agency to send inspectors back to the
country they left before last year's U.S.-led invasion, the agency's head said Tuesday.
He said that the U.N. inspectors were ready
to begin talks with Bush's puppets
to arrange a return. The United States formally transferred sovereignty to June 28.
Sure they did - that's the day Iraq became "free" and "safe."
The talk show Nazis and the cable fascists keep saying "Saddam
inspectors out, that's another reason why we had to invade," ...but that's just a lie.
The inspectors kept pleading, "Let us do our work!" but Bush refused because Saddam was
just days or maybe even minutes away from launching the WMDs that would cause Kinda Sleazy
Rice to warn us that "the mushroom cloud" was our only other alternative to a fast invasion.
Why doesn't a responsible news organization point that out?
Because there are none left?
This isn't book history with conflicting accounts of what really
This only happened 16 months ago - why doesn't anyone remember?
More of this...
The talk show Nazis and the cable fascists keep saying "We
went to Iraq to free those people,
because freedom is God's gift to everyone,"
Like we don't remember Bush's constant, "March
to war, march to war!"
Remember that Clear Channel (R-BFEE) held a war rally in lots of cities.
"March to war, march to war!"
I think I remember saying it was like Gone
with the Wind," because the GOP media breathlessly
kept saying "Have you heard? We're going to war," like that was some good fucking thing.
Why doesn't a responsible news organization point that out?
Because there are none left?
Thank you Jesus, for forcing this Giggling
Murderer on us - but why are you so pissed at us?
If freedom is,"God's gift to everyone," ...when do we get ours?
"My friends, do you not just sit out there
and marvel sometimes, at me?"
--Rush Limbaugh, on why no woman will stay with his Nazi gasbag ass Attribution
Louisiana's traditional cockfight industry under fire
By 11 a.m., the seats are filled, private bets are placed and every eye is focused
on the center pit, where two cocks, perched in their handlers' arms, face each other
head to head, signaling the beginning of the fight.
As soon as the cock touch the floor, they
attack. Armed with tiny knives attached to their legs,
they engage in bloody battle until one or both can no longer stand. In the end, one likely will die.
Animal activists call it barbaric and have
launched a campaign to end cockfighting in Louisiana
and New Mexico, the only states where it is legal.
Uh, ..excuse me, ...your cock can
fight in Oklahoma.
Some judge said, "Cockfighting is Americana" and ruled the ban on cockfighting invalid.
Legal cock-fighting is going on right now, ...as far as I can tell.
My subscription to Cock Weekly ran out.
Cockfighting is not only big business in
bringing in an estimated $150 million, it is also a political issue.
That ain't shiite.
Legal marijuana might bring $15B into Louisiana, so don't keep it for the money.
Keep it because God likes cockfighting.
Need help setting that up?
Talk to Karl Rove.
Say Marijuana Research Blocked
Knowledge is bad, education can hurt you, close your eyes
(Bush) is violating federal law by obstructing medical marijuana research, scientists
contend in lawsuits seeking faster action on applications to grow the drug.
In lawsuits to be filed Wednesday, researchers
assert that Washington is refusing to act
on legitimate research projects and delaying studies that could lead to marijuana's use as
a prescription drug.
"There is an urgent need for an alternative supply
of marijuana for medical research," said
Lyle Craker, director of the Medicinal Plant Program at the University of Massachusetts-Amherst,
the main force behind the lawsuits.
Marijuana is a relatively harmless drug, but they can't let the
truth get out. Why?
The Invisible Cloud Being wants his children to suffer, He wants them in pain.
If pot was legal, somebody might have fun with it, and we can't have any of that!!!
The BIG reason, you and I could grow great pot on property we own, and cut out
the money the greedy sons of bitches can make fining up, jailing us, representing us etc.
Legal marijuana could balance the budget and solve tons of problems.
Pot sells for - let's say - $3000 a pound.
How much does a farmer get for a pound of corn?
How much does a farmer get for a pound of soybeans?
How much does a farmer get for a pound of wheat?
How much does a farmer get for a pound of cotton?
How much does a farmer get for a pound of beef?
How much does a farmer get for a pound of pork?
They don't want Americans to have a good time - they want you
They don't want dying people to keep food down - they want God's name praised!
They don't want sick people to be able to control their epileptic seizures - read the story!.
Religio-crazies like Bush and Ashcroft want BIGGER government
to track down otherwise
law-abiding citizens and punish them, sometimes with death, for smoking harmless flowers
while taking bribes from BIG cancer to keep tobacco killing 400,000 people a year.
you heard BCR #47, Tommy Chong was sentenced for selling plastic pipes
While Ashcroft had FBI agents trying to entrap never-been-arrested people like Tommy Chong, Al Qaeda had
a clear shot at killing New York and 3,000 people died because of those ignorant bastards wanted to torment
taxpaying citizens for not thinking like the religiously insane fools.
When will this nation grow up and act logically about drugs?
Marty's Entertainment Page
"George Bush....in his bachelor pad....with
I'm sorry. I thought we were playing Clue."
--TBogg, asking "Where Was Bush During Vietnam?" Attribution
Subject: GOP blind eyes
The seven charges brought against Saddam
Hussein by the new Iraqi government
certainly shatter the myth that Republicans and conservatives are tough on terrorism.
Five of the charges had specific time frames,
and do you know what?
They all occurred while there was a Republican president:
1. Killing of religious figures in 1974.
2. Gassing of Kurds in 1988.
3. Killing the Kurdish Barzani clan in 1983.
4. The 1986-88 campaign of displacing Kurds.
5. The suppression of the 1991 uprising by Kurds and Shiites.
6. The 1990 invasion of Kuwait.
Why didn't Presidents George H.W. Bush and
Reagan do something to stop the
slaughter of hundreds of thousands of Iraqis during the 1980s?
Republicans continue to insist that Democrats
are soft on terrorism and crime, but yet,
it was Republican presidents who turned a blind eye to the genocide in Iraq.
Had Reagan and Bush done something about
Hussein and terrorists in the 1980s,
maybe the terrorists attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, would not have happened.
Armstrong in First Place
He's too old to win a sixth title ...isn't he?
Jackson Denies Quads due soon
I never even slept with four women, he says
Soldiers Leave for Better Pay
$60K or $200K - which job would you rather have?
to Deport Chess Great Bobby Fischer
Did he say something nice about Michael Moore?
to set up Boston 'War Room'
Will the Dems do that in NY? Or would that be 'impolite?'
ON WAR IN IRAQ, BUSH HAS BEEN:
entire truth 18%
Hiding something 59%
Mostly lying 20%
Only 18 percent say Bush
is an honest man!
His lies have killed 900 - just on our side.
"Have them all pantsed, leashed and give them to the dogs..."
In the last issue, I wrote:
> For reasons I still don't understand, Poker Queen & Buck showed
up out of the blue.
> How did they know where we were? Who gave them directions?
To some, this read:
Who invited them to our private party?
How did they know how to find us?
That was very poor wording on my part - but I'm a liberal, so I have an excuse.
In Tulsa, every big east/west street is a mile apart and it ends
in a "1," such as 31 St, 51 St, 71 St.etc
Also, most streets are in alphabetical and geographical order.
East of Main Street, you first hit Boston, then Cincinnati, then Detroit etc.
West of Main Street, you first hit Boulder, then Cheyenne, then Denver.
Any idiot can find their way in Tulsa because they have a major street every mile
and they're numbered or titled to always let you know when you're close.
In Chicago, you have the nuttiest, criss-crossing, mish-mash of
gobbledegook street names you ever saw.
You pull up to an intersection and turning left puts you on a different street name than turning right.
Some streets change their name, then it comes to an intersection with two left turns and two right turns.
IMO, the only chance we had to find the Roof Lady's house was
handing our directions to the cab driver and
pray to Koresh he knew what to do. Six or eight of us went in two cabs to get there. Apparently, I had previously
given PQ and Buck the directions, expecting them to call for a guide, but they found it like they grew up in Chicago.
That's all I meant by that. I was amazed that anyone from out of town could find the Roof Lady's apartment.
That's all I meant.
I apologize for the poor wording.
Subject: heard your AAR ads
Hiya. Nice work.
I have a couple of questions that you might be able to help me with.
Basically I plan to launch something that
will be mouthy and liberal and will potentially walk a fine line
as I judge your material does. How do you protect yourself legally against anyone of your ripe targets
from suing your asses?
Dude, I would love to be sued,
and the bigger the plaintiff the better.
In 1360 issues, I've never said anything I can't back up.
The sons of bitches don't even want a piece of me.
Did you receive any legal counsel on this topic? Are you just winging it?
When you speak the truth, you don't need
to worry about any of that.
Bush is a crooked moron who kills for fun.
Rush is a filthy Nazi who has never told the truth to his sheep.
Dr Laura is lying hypocrite who enjoys showing her vagina to young boys.
Bill Bennett is a degenerate bastard who can't control his own vices.
As long as you tell the truth - you are invulnerable.
Are there certain things you know not to say?
I would never, even in jest, say anything
that could be construed as urging others
to cause physical harm to the president or any elected official.
I want to have some sense of how to walk
that potential mine field of litigiousness.
I would very much welcome a phone call on this topic - or - I would love to interact
with some of those 64 IQ points to know more.
Keep up the great work. I'm amazed at some
of the things that you put out there
and I appreciate your courage.
Kal, go after anyone who's lying and don't worry about the consequences.
Nobody will sue me because they don't dare allow themselves to be put to the test.
If Rush or Laura sued me, I'd subpoena copies of every show they've
ever done and I'd get a
volunteer army to pull out the most hate-filled, vicious lies these "Christians" ever fabricated
about the best president of the last 50 years and make any jury in the world hate them
After years of Nazi nonsense books,
we finally have some balance at the bookstores
Subscribe between now and the end of July and get 2-for-1.
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First, you get
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Chronicle Editor Suspended for Kerry Donation
Who knew there were liberals in San Francisco?
The paper, whose editorials backed Gore in 2000, bars staffers from making campaign
contributions without the approval of editors. The San Francisco area is known as one of
the most politically liberal in the country.
"He's a gatekeeper," Rosenthal said in an interview.
"If he was a food writer or a sports writer
I don't think there would be an issue here. He controls the content of the paper in some form.
He controls very opinionated content that has to do frequently with politics."
"The issue here is the appearance of conflict.
The only thing that could be worse than this is, ...say, ...FOX
News hiring Bush's cousin
to call the election for Bush while Gore was winning, causing the other sheep networks to
follow them because Amertica's whore media would rather be first than right.
Play Poker online with Bart
Ronstadt kicked from Aladdin casino
How dare she not endorse the Giggler's murders!
Linda Ronstadt was thrown out of the Aladdin in Las Vegas on the weekend after
dedicating a song to Michael Moore and "F 9/11," a casino spokeswoman said Monday.
That dedication angered some
guests lawless Freepers
who spilled drinks,
tore down posters and demanded their money back, said casino spokeswoman Sara Gorgon.
The Aladdin said Ronstadt had been "escorted
out of the hotel" just after her performance
and said the performer would "not be welcomed back." "Ms. Ronstadt was hired to entertain
the guests of the Aladdin, not to espouse political views," the casino said.
...but if former comedian Dennis Miller were to go onstage and
call Kerry and Edwards
"a couple of liberal faggot, rumpbumpers," that would be OK with the Aladdin?
Ronstadt, if we can believe The Aladdin, was not even
asked to leave.
She was escorted to the door, without her belongings, and placed outside.
Let's size this one up:
Aladdin is run by anti-free speech Nazis.
They do not agree with the 64 percent of Americans who say this war is a mistake.
They punished the innocent and, apparently, failed to arrest those who vandalized the place.
They do not want money from a majority of Americans, Gore voters.
is very different from anything you've ever heard before.
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I watched Tuesday night's CBS News with Dan the Texan
He did a story about a 68 year old man who was just drafted
by the BFEE
and a 65 year old man who was just drafted by the BFEE. They're shrinks,
going to Iraq to counsel freaked out soldiers trying to get back from mental hell.
I'm sure about the ages, because they called them "Medicade soldiers."
So I went to cbsnews.com and like always, there
was nothing there about this.
Am I asking too much?
Can't CBS find anybody to put their top news stories on their news website?
Note: Two hours later, it showed up
Click Here then click on Seniors called to war on the left of your screen.
Hurry, before Mr. Rove orders then to take it down.
don't the media ever use search engines?
by Faun Otter
Bush's American soldier body count in Iraq
895, 896, 901
dead American soldiers.
Drip, drip, drip - young lives go down the drain
"The Republican party is full of people without
-- Bartcop, as quoted at http://pearly230.tripod.com/htmls/conservative-jokes.html
I don't deny saying that, ...but I also don't specifically
remember gathering those words in that order,
...but it does have my sentence structure - small words, multiple mono-syllabic words, limited reach,
but people understand plain talk - even in the South.
Yep, ...I musta said that.
Bush Underestimated War Costs by $12.3 Billion
The administration underestimated the 2004 cost of Bush's bloody war in Iraq
and Afghanistan by $12.3 billion, fueling criticism that the war was badly planned.
At every speech, Bush accuses Kerry of hanging the soldiers out
and so far, Kerry is just taking it - and not answering back with anything.
Now that we've find out Bush wasted $12B on garden variety screw-ups in Iraq,
will Kerry's unexplained silence continue?
Think of the good we could have done with that $12B
instead of giving it to Halliburton.
Yesterday's USA Today said the Crips and Bloods are coming back because most
police forces had to cut back on fighting street gangs because they couldn't afford it.
Think of the infrastructure repairs, the school lunch programs,
the funding of the fire department, women's shelters,
the terrorism hardware we could have purchased
- anything besides Bush giving it to his billionaire buddies.
...but as long as Kerry remains silent, why should Bush stop?
Do you have an opinion?
Then listen for your call on...
You have two minutes to record your message.
"No, I cannot say the world is safer today
than it was two, three years ago."
-- U.N. Sec-General Kofi Annan, Attribution
pulls Insuance scam on soldiers going to war
No doubt the BFEE gets a cut of this swindled blood money
Stachler says he thought he had arranged to have $100 a month deducted from his pay for some sort
of Army-endorsed savings plan or mutual fund. When he returned from Iraq, he found that he had not
been saving the money at all. He had been paying $100 a month in premiums for an insurance policy that
promised him some cash value far down the road and a death benefit that was almost certainly less than
$44,000, a small amount compared with the $250,000 in life insurance he had through a military-sponsored
plan that cost him $16.25 a month.
If you need a soldier screwed, call the Bush White House.
Bush's crooked friends in the insurance industry can help.
Use this portal
and they'll send bartcop.com
Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
Copyright © 2004, bartcop.com
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Shirley Manson of the rock group "Garbage."
Shrl, call The BartPhone,
just to say "Hi!"
Plus, leave an e-mail address and I'll make you a BartCop Member - for free!
You can call the Bart-Phone at 918-748-1714
That would be really cool, and we'll catch you in Vegas at The Joint on your next American tour.
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