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Volume 1159 - He took an oath

      Please visit our sponsors

 Friday  Sept 19, 2003 


"He is brilliant, he is brave. And he's got a sack full of guts.''
    -- Big Dog, talking about Wesley Clark

 Kennedy Says Case for Iraq War Was Fraud 
  So what's stopping you from impeaching the son of a bitch?
  Our guy was innocent, no lives lost, and they impeached him

  Click  Here

 The case for going to war against Iraq was a fraud "made up in Texas"
 to give Republicans a political boost, Ted Kennedy said Thursday.
 Kennedy also said the Bush administration has failed to account for
 nearly half of the $4 billion the war is costing each month. He said he
 believes much of the unaccounted-for money is being used to bribe
 foreign leaders to send in troops.

 Poor Teddy, he never was the sharpest knife in the Kennedy kitchen.
 They're not bribing world leaders (or if they are, they're doing it with
 a million or two, not billions). Besides, no other countries have sent
 significan forces to Iraq except going-to-Carlyle bribed Blair.

 No, they're STEALING that money, Ted.
 Where's your head?

 Now get to work on impeachment so the next president will think twice
 about getting hundreds of our brave men killed for no goddamn reason.


"We now know that Saddam has resumed his efforts to acquire nuclear weapons."

"There is no doubt that Saddam Hussein now has weapons of mass destruction."

"We know he's reconstituted these programs since the Gulf War."

"We know that he has a long-standing relationship with various terrorist groups, including the Al Qaeda organization."

"We believe he has, in fact, reconstituted nuclear weapons." It’s
     -- Whistle Dick Cheney, who NOW says he never said that.

 Saw it on

 "I hereby order the military to shoot that Tom guy!"

 Big Dog welcomed as a hero in Kosovo
  Why doesn't Bush go to Baghdad and walk the streets?

  Click  Here

 Basking in public adoration the United States can only dream of in Iraq, Bill Clinton got
 a hero’s welcome in Kosovo on Friday, four years after NATO bombing ended Serb rule.

 Thousands of Kosovo Albanians turned out to greet the man they see as their liberator from
 a decade of repression under then Slobodan Milosevic. Schoolchildren got the day off and
 well-wishers waving the Star and Stripes thronged Pristina’s Bill Clinton Boulevard as his
 motorcade drove by.  Loud applause erupted when Clinton, while also preaching ethnic
 reconciliation with Serbs, gave what Kosovo Albanians may be keen to interpret as implicit
 support for their drive for complete independence from Serbia. “I love this country,” he told a
 packed Pristina University hall in a speech which, like much of his visit, was broadcast live on television.

 If Bush wasn't an oil-stealing, murdering bastard, we'd be respected around the globe.

If Bush is innocent, why is he
blocking all investigations into 9-11?

Would evil men allow thousands
to be murdered to take over the world?

 Repeat from yesterday Quotes

"The Bush family reeks of fraud and bad karma. But even worse than our wretched, gibbling president
  are the cowardly whores in Hollywood who are currently smearing film stars and music people like
  Johnny Depp by calling them unpatriotic Americans who righteously question the wisdom of invading
  a whole nation of Islam  -- 1.8 billion worshipers -- which is a dangerously stupid idea."
   -- Hunter S. Thompson, who is much more Bart than I am

 My plan, our plan, THE plan

  Click  Here

 In time, the Baron knows, the people of Arrakis will come to hate Rabban so much that when
 he removes his incompetent nephew and replaces him with Sting... that is, with his other nephew
 Feyd-Rautha, the people will welcome Feyd as a savior.  But Feyd is actually more cruel and
 ruthless than Rabban - the difference being that he is also brilliant.

 So if Dubya is Rabban (and the comparison is too scary to ignore), and the Harkonnens
 are the Bushes  and the Atreides are the Clintons, who is Feyd?

 Feyd is handsome, charming, cunning, and trained since birth to warfare and politics.
 For a while, I thought it was going to be Jeb. But now...


"We're the envy of the whole world but we are trapped in a jobless economy and
  an endless occupation and that is the problem we have to address.  I'm running for
  president because this country needs leadership. It needs honest leadership,
  it needs visionary leadership, it needs leadership with experience."
    -- Wesley Clark, in Florida, launching his campaign to kick the Moron's ass

 The BBC's bullies can dish it out, but they can't take it
   by Joe Conason

  Click  Here

 From Rupert Murdoch's Fox News Channel to Sun Myung Moon's Washington Times,
 from Clear Channel's nationwide radio network to the Wall Street Journal's editorial page,
 the machinery churns throughout the 24-hour news cycle.

 Its leverage over public debate in America is profound. Conservatives still complain about
 the "liberal media", but their ideas (and ideologues) command opinion-making airtime and newsprint.
 No rightwing extremist is judged too rancid to be awarded his own cable TV show.

Please visit our sponsors

 The Church of Reality 

  Click  Here

 Fundamental Principles
 Here are some of the principles of the Church of Reality. The Church of Reality is not a dogma based religion.
 There is no "Bible" in the Church of Reality. But there are some principles that we hold to be true. And this list
 will change and grow as we continue to learn. Some of these principles may be wrong and all are open to debate.

 Commitment to Reality - We are committed to trying to see reality the way it really is. We reject dogma and
 mythology and beliefs that have no basis in the real world. If something is true, we believe in it. Although we'll
 probably never accomplish it, we aspire to understand everything the way it really is.

 It's the only church I'd give my time and money to.

 They must read  in Cali-fornia

  Click  Here

 Bustamante and McClintock are threatening to boycott the only debate Musclehead
 plans to attend in the recall case unless organizers switch to an unscripted format.

 "I wouldn't do a pose-down with him and he obviously doesn't want to debate me,"
 McClintock told KFI-AM, referring to Schwarzenegger's bodybuilding days.
 The unusual alliance by Musclehead's fellow front-runners undercut any sign of GOP
 unity less than a week after the party's convention and illustrated claims by McClintock
 — gaining on the action-hero in the latest polls — that he's in the race until the finish.

 You see how easy that is?
 This tactic was FREE it was EASY and this kind of action brings BIG HEADLINES.
 The scared-bunny Democrats could do this stuff to Bush every day until next November,
 but they're too goddamn afraid to take ANY action. What's wrong with them?

 Whoever the Democratic nominee turns out to be, all he's got to do to win is challenge
 the never-elected fraud to a real debate, man -to-man, and he's guaranteed to win.
 Democrats want to steal their paycheck every month while doing nothing to earn it.
 They should be sued for fraud and run out of Washington if they're unwilling to work.

 Democrats should be wary of Wesley Clark

  Click  Here

 He has no political experience, but in interviews, he talks like a typical politician: in other words, like a snake.
 He won't call Bush a liar outright; instead, he says it in a weasely way, ostensibly to not offend anyone who likes Bush.

 Rob, I'm a one-issue guy this coming election.  The only thing I care about is...

More new entries in the sticker contest

  Click  Here

 If you sent a sticker pic in that's not on this page, please re-send it.
 Picking the best sticker for September will be tough.

U.S. Treasury Secretary John Snow is caught putting cash in his pocket
while Afghan Finance Minister Ashraf Ghani Ahmadzai (R-Puppet)
distracts reporters at a news conference at the Presidential Palace in Kabul,
Thursday Sept.18, 2003 .(AP Photo/Natacha Pisarenko)

 Subject: Del Castillo

 Did you know Del Castillo did the soundtrack for the new
 Antonio Banderas movie, "Once Upon a Time in Mexico?"

 From what I've heard, Rick does all Banderas's guitar parts in the movie, too.


 This kills me, because I can't find the damn e-mail from
 My extra good friend*, Rick Del Castillo and his band flew to New York
 with Robert Rodriquez to play the film's theme at the premier.

 ha ha

 Somebody tell Little Ricky that Bart from the Hard Rock Island in Tulsa says "Hey."

 Plus, he owes me & Mrs Bart dinner.

Marty's E! page
Wanda Sykes starts year 2 of 'Wanda At Large' on Faux tonight
Fresh BAGnews
Robert Duvall's star on the Hollywood Walk O'Fame
'Let It Be...Naked'
Spike Lee speaks
Maiolica dinnerware
Time Warner drops 'AOL' from name
Giant squids & the Spanish navy
And basic cable ratings


 "U.S. stocks power to new highs"

 Lie told by to keep owner Viacom's tax cuts coming
 They mean "new highs under the Unelected Pinhead"   Attribution

 The networks will tell ANY lie for their $5,000,000,000 bribe.

 Bush leads all Democratics in national polls?

  Click  Here

 Bush against:
 Lieberman,    51-39%
 Gore             53-41%
 Gephardt      51-39%
 Dean            53-38%
 Kerry           53-38?
 Hillary          52-42%

 I say this is horseshit - why?

 Bought-and-paid-for   John Zogby (R-ForRent)
 says Pinhead's negatives are at 54%

 This means people who don't like him are voting for him?
 But, look who had the highest numbers against the murderer.

    Clinton 44

 Blix Attacks 'Spin and Hype' of Iraq Weapon Claims

  Click  Here

 Blix, who said this week he believed Iraq destroyed its weapons of mass destruction 10 years ago,
 told BBC radio that the US and Britain "over-interpreted" intelligence about Baghdad's weapons programs.

 Blix compared Bush and Blair to medieval witch-hunters, saying they convinced themselves on the basis of
 evidence which was later discredited, including forged documents about alleged attempts to buy uranium for nuclear weapons.
"In the Middle Ages when people were convinced there were witches they certainly found them. This is a bit risky," said Blix.

"What in a way stands accused is the culture of spin, the culture of hyping.... Advertisers will advertise a refrigerator
 in terms that we don't quite believe in, but we expect governments to be more serious and have more credibility," he said.

 Subject: Bill O'LIE LY

 The faux news phony suggests all Americans boycott the French because of this.......are you ready?

 The French have put our troops in harms way!.. HUH?
 It wasn't one of the Clintons??
 I thought the Commander in thief was the culprit in this Iraqi bullshit.

 How much longer can they get away with blaming others for their screwups??

 Ed, they will continue to lie until there's more profit in the truth.

 Bush to New Yorkers: Drop Dead

  Click  Here

 Because of Bush's lies, thousands of Americans will suffer cancers, emphysema, heart attack,
 stroke, birth defects, stillbirths, sterility, eye/ear/nose/throat disease and much more.

 There have been few toxic events to match the explosions that pulverized the two WTC towers.
 The short-term deaths of three thousand people will be dwarfed over the long term by the lethal fallout.

 This man has horribly wronged the people of New York, whose terrible tragedies he continues to exploit.
 He puts us all at risk in exchange for campaign contributions.

 New Yorkers---all Americans---suffer and die as a result. It's a debt that can never be repaid.

Please visit our sponsors

 Dueling Quotes

"The Democratic Party seems to think that Saddam did not hit us on 9-11, but Halliburton did."
       --Ann Coulter, September 13, 2003

"No, we've had no evidence that Saddam was involved with 9111."
      -- Never-elected Moron, September 17, 2003

 Thanks to Ricky Z

       Annie gets her free French fries


 The difference between Napster and Clear Channel is Napster gave you the songs you wanted,
 but Clear Channel broadcasts the songs they want you to hear, the ones that made them the most money.

 Screw the RIAA.

 They're not concerned with the artist getting his fair share.
 They're just GOP-greedy grubbers who want to be paid a million times for the same old product.

 What if you subscribers dialed up  every day and got the same, old issue?
 Would you subscribers pay for the same old issue again and again and again and again?

 That's what the RIAA is - they want you to pay them each time you hear a 40-year old song.
 Screw their Republican greed.

 Sticker placement contest

 Get yours, then send in a digital photo of where you put it.
 (Please don't vandalize anything with these stickers)

 To get your stickers, send a self-addressed envelope to:
 PO Box 54466
 Tulsa, OK 74155

 OR, you could PayPal a small donation and get your stickers within 48 hours.

 The stickers are free, but donations are accepted.

 We'll give away a prize each month for Best Sticker Placement.
 A Brooke Burke calendar or Joe Conason's new book.


 ha ha

 Remember Harvey Corman in Blazing Saddles?

 "...Oh, legs, ...Oh, Lily, ...Oh, legs, ...Oh, Lily..."

 Send in your sticker pics.

 Subject: No job, lost the house....

 Hey Bart,

 You said this on Thursday in reaction to a great Molly Ivins column:

> “Having a great economy means you get to keep your house and your car?
>  It means you can afford braces and clothes for the kids. It means you can take a vacation
>  and unwind from the nit-picking troubles of your job. It means you can actually go to the doctor
>  when you feel bad and insurance will soften the blow. It even means that Dad doesn't hit Mom anymore,
>  because he's not cracking up from the stress of trying to making ends meet, but they never do.”

 This really hit home. I’ve been out of work since August of 2002, and I was forced to sell my house
 (I’m actually lucky...I got somebody to buy it just before the bankers came and repossessed it).
 My cars are old, but still running (although one of them doesn’t go very far in the rain before stalling).
 Braces are out of the question (as are routine dental exams), and the Good Will store has been seeing
 some of our $1.00-per-shirt business lately.

 Vacation?  What a word! I dream of taking a walk on the beach.

 Why, I’d even like to be down there now, hurricane or no hurricane. No health insurance...
 I warned my wife and two kids last year, “NOBODY IS ALLOWED TO GET SICK OR INJURED!”
 I would NEVER hit my wife of 23 years, but, frankly, I have thought seriously about “hitting” myself on occasion.
 My ends are so far apart that, when and if they eventually DO meet again, they will probably speak in
 different languages and be unable to understand one another.

 I look forward to Dean or Clark or somebody giving Bush the ass-kicking he truly deserves.

 Anyway, keep up the great work. You help me and many dozens of others to make it through each day.


 Presidential Confession

  Click  Here

 I spent the U.S. surplus and bankrupted the US Treasury.
 In my first year in office I set the all-time record for most days on  vacation
 I set the all-time record for most real estate foreclosures in a 12-month period.
 I cut health care benefits for war veterans.
 I am the first US president to establish a secret shadow government.

 Guards at Tomb of the Unknowns Stand Tall

  Click  Here

 As the winds from Hurricane Isabel swept over Arlington National Cemetery,
 the soldiers who guard the Tomb of the Unknowns were given — for the first time
 in history — permission to abandon their posts and seek shelter.

"They told us that. But that's not what's going to happen," said Sgt. Christopher Holmes,
 standing vigil on overnight duty. "That's never an option for us."


 Subject: Wounded Troops Billed Misinfo

 Hi, Bart

 While I really enjoy your web page.
 Most of the time you get the truth out.
 This is not one of them...

 ha ha
 Please be gentle...

 Troops do not pay for meals in hospital's anywhere.
 They all get fed while recovering.  Your article implies that they have to PAY to EAT.
 Not true.
 The bills are for the money for substance collected extra while they are in the hospital.

 Why do we have to pay $8.10 to servicemen each day for subsistance?
 Does the Government not provide food and items for them?
 Why not give all servicemen a $8.10 day raise in pay if neessary?

 If Billions can go to Halliburton why not a few hundred thousand to the troops?

 Just my view on this matter.....
 Keep up the good work....

 Chuck, I didn't make that up.
 It was in Stars and Stripes Magazine, as attributed at the time.
 You don't think I own that magazine, do you?

 I kid around a lot, but I don't joke about our fighting boys being mistreated.
 At  that's sacred ground.
 These guys deserve the best during and AFTER they've served their country.

 From: mark

 Subject: Bush: No Iraqi link to Sept. 11


 This is *it*. I urge you to jump up and down more <eep, eep>, and exhort your readers
 to email every newspaper, and call every Congresscritter, to call for impeachment.

 My letter to the Chicago Trib:

 To the Editor:
 Mr. Bush now admits that Saddam Hussein's regime had no link to 9/11, or al Qaeda.
 There are no weapons of mass destruction. Either we have spent tens of billions of our tax dollars
 on utterly false intelligence, or this administration took us to war, at a cost of currently over $150B,
 and over 300 American lives, and probably over a thousand wounded or maim Americans, and tens
 of thousands of Iraqis, for a lie.

 President Clinton was impeached over lying about sex. Is it not far past time to call for the impeachment
 of Mr. Bush and Mr. Cheney...and if not now, when?


 Mark, the Democrats are too afraid of Karl Rove.
 They'd give their children away before they'd make a move on Bush.


"Suddenly the president, the vice president and sundry other administration officials are
  publicly "correcting" certain aspects of the propaganda campaign that drove the United
  States into war with Iraq. Yet anyone who reads the Washington Post should have strongly
  suspected that false premises underpinned the war. To find the Post's path-breaking stories,
  however, most of which were reported by Walter Pincus, readers had to thumb their way
  back to Page A20 or deeper."
    -- Joe Conason

 Subject: hunter s thompson

 hey bart,

 hunter's been kickin' right wing ass since you were runnin' barefoot thru your daddy's dirt farm as a child prodigy....
 also, queer guy is funny, but it ain't as funny as reno 911, THE funniest new show of the summer....

 keep on keepin' on
 john j

 John, I didn't mean to imply I was better or funnier than Hunter S. Thompson.
 Also, you could be right about Reno 911, but I've never seen it.

 Collect $1.1 Billion Microsoft Settlement Benefits Now
  This is not a trick, a sales tool, a gimmick or a joke

  Click  Here

 Tomorrow millions of California consumers and businesses will begin receiving forms allowing them to
 claim up to $1.1 billion in benefits from the settlement of an antitrust class action lawsuit against Microsoft.
 Over 10 million forms will be mailed during the next 60 days. Claim forms may also be obtained immediately
 online at or by calling 1-800-203-9995.

 California consumers and businesses will now have an opportunity to recover a substantial portion of the prices
 they paid for all of their Microsoft operating system, spreadsheet and word processing software purchased
 during a seven year period ending in December 2001. Consumers can recover the first $100 of their benefits
 just by listing their eligible Microsoft product purchases on a claim form and signing their names. Even larger
 recoveries will be obtained by those who provide documentation of more than five purchases of eligible Microsoft products.

Another great moment in history...

 Subscriber help

 Can't get in?   Click  Here  to reach Sam
 If you should be in the members section, but aren't, write to Sam and tell her
 if you subscribed by  2Checkout,  PayPal  or  snail mail.  She'll fix you up.

 Half off for students, teachers, military

 Is membership  worth $5 a month when you're on a tight budget?

 Subject: South African tequila?

 I found a story about this stuff on  It sounds really odd.
 I'm sure it can't touch Chinaco, but you at least have to give South African Tequila a shot, right?

 Here's a link to a very short page on the distillery.   Agave Distillers
 Dave the Lawyer

Fr. Mushroom's Pigskin Pics
Texas 67 Rice 3
Penn State 28 Kent State 14
Redskins 30 Giants 21
Patriots 29 Jets 11
Raiders 26 Broncos 24
(If Dallas loses, it'll be a good weekend)

Click to Enter

 Iraq effect shakes National Guard
 Tours of duty get longer and riskier, prompting concern about retention and recruitment.

  Click  Here

"The morale there is the lowest it's ever been," his wife says. "They talk about how terrified they
  are to go out. They are really afraid." Members of the company began second guessing their
  decision to enlist soon after they arrived in Iraq only to discover that their mission required much
  more than the weekend a month and two weeks a year many signed up for.

 Under this Unelected Clown, the 'weekend a month and two weeks a year' turned into
 kiss your family goodbye because you're going to die in Iraq to make Bush richer.

 Bush's American soldier body count in Iraq
 It now stands at  301, 319 counting the injured who have since died.

 Soon, we'll be at 400.
 How long before we hit 600?  Or 1000?

 Total deaths since President Frog-blaster said, "Bring 'em On":  97+

 NOTE: These figures don't include the eight dead reported Thursday.

  Perhaps 1,200 wounded - missing arms, legs and eyes.
 How much more are we willing to tolerate?


Something on your mind?
 Call the

You have two minutes to speak your peace.


 How about doing disabled veterans a favor and ask all Democratic presidential hopefils
 to promise not to reduce present or future veteran's disability benefits?

 All the GOP mentions is "taking a look" at veteran's benefits, and we all know what that means.
 I think the candidate who promises to protect veteran's disability benefits would immediately be
 assured the present and future Veteran vote.


 Jack, I think it is a CRIME that veterans have to ask for help after risking their lives,
 and then getting hurt, while fighting America's enemies so we can be safe and remain free.
 Taking care of disabled veterans should be our highest priority.

 "You mean higher than tax cuts for my super-rich friends?"

 The Illegal Punk has done his best to disable our disabled veterans and if we had a free press the nation
 would be outraged.  The bastards are rationing water for our soldiers in Iraq and they're losing weight.

 Did you hear that, America?
 Our soldiers are losing weight because they don't have enough Halliburton food and Halliburton water
 like they were on some goddamn TV show where you get voted off the island. This makes me sick.

 America should take care of our aging vets like they were our parents.

Bush Lied
Brave Men Died
Economy Fried
Press Buyed
Bush's Hide
Constitution Denied
Nader Pied
Take for a Ride
GI Suicide
Justice Tied
Arrogance Wide

 Have a good time today - that's just a suggestion...

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                                                        Krugman  ......      H Clinton                     Franken           ...   Conason                  M Moore


 Read the Previous Issue

 It had  everything.

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 Plus, leave an e-mail address and I'll make you a BartCop Member - for free!

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