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America where are you now?
Don't you care about your sons and daughters?
Don't you know we need you now?
We can't fight alone against this monster...
If I ever hit it big,
Quote of the Day
"As a firefighter who spent months at Ground
"If Kerry had his way, Saddam Hussein would
still be in power in Iraq threatening America.
Maybe he was hoping Saddam would lose the election in Iraq.'
-- the never-elected Monkey Attribution
John Kerry accused Bush of "stonewalling" inquiries into 9-11 and Iraqi WMDs.
"Why is this administration stonewalling
and resisting the investigation into what happened and why
we had the greatest security failure in the history of our country? The American people deserve an
answer now. The immediate instinct of the Republicans and this administration was to shut it down."
Damn, ...Kennedy on Friday and then Kerry
over the weekend?
Suddenly, we're seeing signs of sacin the wimpy-ass party of scared losers?
Guys, I love seeing this, but where the fuck have you been the last three years?
Have the Senate democrats found bartcop.com?
I kid about things like that, but after three years of groveling on their knees for Captain Hijack,
if the Democrats finally grow a pair, can we rule out the influence of dozens of bartcop.com readers?
The best we could hope for was that bartcop.com broke some camel's back, but I'd like to hear the story.
life is Pacino's Scarface, ... when the two slugs in the
nightclub start firing machine pistols in the middle
of Belzer's stand-up act, if I advised Tony Montana to fall under the cocktail table and whip out his firearm
and look for two pairs of pants not running in a panic, and then shooting the kneecaps of the two culas ...and
then he does that, ...it's probably immodest of me to ask if Tony Montana reads bartcop.com
Sorry, the ego-beast gets out more often than I'd like.
"Want to step outside and chat for a minute?" asked Maj. Gen. David H. Petraeus.
We stood 15 feet beyond the tent flap. I
blinked at the swirling dust, and felt grit between my molars.
When Petraeus turned to face me, I was alarmed to see how troubled his blue eyes were.
"This thing is turning into shit," he said. "The 3 ID" -- the 3rd Infantry Division, fighting just ahead of
the 101st around Najaf -- "is in danger of running out of food and water. They lost two Abrams and
a Bradley last night, although they got the crews out. The corps commander sounds tired."
"No one really saw this coming, did they?" I said.
"No," he replied. No prewar estimates had anticipated
a defense of Najaf by Iraqi regular army or
Republican Guard troops, nor did those estimates predict stiff resistance from paramilitary forces.
"We did worst-case scenarios, where the enemy really put up a fight, but no one took it very seriously.
We need to get lucky. The CIA really needs to pull one out."
I feel bad for the general - he probably just lost his stars.
The BFEE doesn't like anyone telling the truth about Bush's failed and bloody war.
"It is indisputable based on everything we
know that the U.S. played a very direct and public role
in pressuring Aristide to leave office by making it clear that the united States would do nothing to
protect him from the armed thugs who (were) threatening to kill him. His choice was simple:
Stay in Haiti with no protection from the international community, including the U.S., and be
killed or you can leave the country. That is hardly what I would call a voluntary decision to leave."
--Sen. Christopher Dodd, (D-Usually very quiet) Attribution
Visit www.deckofbush.com for your deck today!
''Frankly, Mr. Mayor, I think your new hairstyle
is the right way to go.
After all, in Washington, the coverup is always worse than the truth.''
--Hillary to Rudy Giuliani at the annual Gridiron Dinner, Attribution
Subject: Kerry and Bush
Do 'ya really think that replacing Bush
with Kerry is going to bring our troops home?
Kerry is just another reincarnation of LBJ.
LBJ also believed that war is "good."
You're getting "Sold Down the River" Bart.
Dan, what a wild a crazy thing to say.
Is this your first visit to bartcop.com?
The problem is not my thinking or my being naive.
The reason OUR boys are dying is because Bush is stealing that
If the UN or NATO gets involved, they'll demand to see the books.
Bush won't show them the books so we're going this alone.
gets elected is allowed to assume the
presidency after winning,
he's not going to be stealing $50,000,000 a day from the Iraqis.
Kerry has no reason to keep the books secret, so he can invite
to come in and replace our troops, which they'll do if they get a piece of the pie.
Since Bush runs the only superpower, no country can tell him to
Withe the media and the democrats covering up for Bush - who can stop him?
Bottom line - If Kerry becomes president, the oil scam is over
so the UN
will come in and share the wealth and the contracts and our boys can come home.
The BFEE is getting richer with every dead body that's flown back from Baghdad.
...and you think I'm being sold down the river?
As the Supreme Court was weighing a landmark gay rights case last year, Scalia gave a
speech in Philadelphia for an advocacy group waging a legal battle against gay rights.
Scalia addressed the $150-a-plate dinner
hosted by the Urban Family Council two months after
hearing oral arguments in a challenge to a Texas law that made gay sex a crime. A month after
the dinner, he sharply dissented from the high court's decision overturning the Texas law. .
So, we have a Supreme Copurt justice who
can be bought.
Is this news to anybody who was alive in the year 2000?
Like most BFEE associates, he openly flaunts
his position because he knows the Democrats won't
raise their voices because they're just too scared. If Scalia can make a few hundred thousand a year
making screw-the-gays speeches, why should be bother to cover up the fact that he's a gay hater?
"A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths
is a statistic."
--Joseph Stalin, Attribution
...and 551 needless, senseless deaths of America's bravest young
"A job well done, Mr. President. We want you to do this four more years."
Iraqis sign interim constitution
After months of negotiation and a last-minute walkout by some members, Iraq's Governing Council
will sign a constitution today that will allow Iraqis to govern themselves and protect individual rights.
''We will sign the interim constitution on Monday as it stands,'' Ibrahim Mohamed Bahr al-Uloum said Sunday.
A Shiite Muslim, he is the son and chief
adviser to the president of the council. He spoke after a Shiite
delegation met with Iraq's senior Shiite cleric, Grand Ayatollah Ali al-Sistani, and reported winning his
approval to sign despite some misgivings.
The Iraq people know how "compassionate"
Bush is and how "concerned" he is that Iraq
gets a legal and binding constitution on their timetable, not his - and did you know pigs can fly?.
I'll tell you exactly what happened.
A undercover spook put a gun to Ibrahim Mohamed Bahr al-Uloum's head and assured him
that either his brains or his signature would be on that constitution in the next 15 seconds.
It's actually quite easy to make decisions when your options are made very clear.
Marty's Entertainment Page
Spalding Gray's Body Found
The body of actor-writer Spalding Gray was pulled from the East River over the weekend,
two months after he walked out of his Manhattan apartment and disappeared. He was 62.
Gray, who laid bare his life and mingled
performance art with comedy in acclaimed monologues
like "Swimming to Cambodia" and "It's a Slippery Slope," was identified Monday .
"The only real problem that the 9/11 Commission
has faced is the lack of cooperation from the White House.
What could possibly be the reason for this stonewalling by the White House? It is as if a whole swath of the
Washington establishment has completely forgotten the horror of the terrorist attacks that killed 3,000
innocent people. But the American people have not forgotten. The American people have their priorities
straight. They place getting at the truth of how that tragedy was carried out above election year politics."
--Sen. Robert Byrd (D-Sac), criticizing Dubya for undermining the independence of the commission
studying failures in prewar intelligence while stonewalling the 9/11 commission, Attribution
Don't use my husband as your mascot
A 9/11 widow's letter to Bush about his new bragging campaign
"My husband, Luis Eduardo Torres, was at his second day of work at Cantor Fitzgerald on 9-11.
He jumped from the 105th floor of the North Tower. Most of his upper body was recovered,
identifiable only through dental records. I was seven months pregnant at the time...
The flags were intended to honor ground
zero and the remains of the dead, but here they are merely props,
used to add a powerful patriotic punch to your message. The tower and the corpse are two hideously broken
and disfigured things behind and under the flag, and your image -- with your red tie, white shirt, and blue suit,
standing in front of thick strong white columns -- serves as another, symbolic, flag.
That image of ground zero, and the body
shrouded with the flag, reminded me of the sulfur from the few
pathetic remnants of my husband's last day: his Cantor ID, Debitchek Meal Card and subway Metrocard.
I thought I'd finished dealing with the
gruesome aspects of his dead body, but it came back to me during your commercial."
These SOBs don't care about anything but the billions they are
To continue stealing these billions, they have to remain in power and they'll do anything
to keep that gravy train coming because the trillions they've stolen are not enough.
Subject: peach trucks
When I was flying to Philly last week for
the Big Trade Show, we had terrible turbulence
during one of the flights. My coworker said to me, "How can you be so calm during all this?"
I replied, "Everybody has a peach truck
with their name on it, so I have a good time every day."
She gave me 'the eyebrow' and I laughed and said, "If the peach truck finds me up here, what
choice do I have but to go down with a shot of Maker's Mark in my hand?"
So I flagged down the drinks cart and got us 2 more.
Thanks for that attitude Bart, I needed
Click for details and to order
"The Justice Department right now is the biggest
threat to personal liberty in the country."
--Dick Armey, who seems to have turned partly sane now that he has no power Attribution
Subject: your web site
I love your site. But I can never think
of anything witty enough or smart enough
to send in that may end up as a snippet on your page.
I have a few words to people who read your
page every day, and contribute nothing.
I am a recent member. But what really is a sawbuck a month? People will spend that amount on the
lastest CD or movie that comes out because thier favorite band or movie star did something entertaining.
How about youse guys putting that amount
of money out once a month to someone who is trying his damnedest
to make the world wake up so we can all lead better lives. You can give $8.50 to see "Starsky and Hutch," and
pay $20 for a small coke and popcorn and watch a crappy movie. Or you can actually be entertained by something
that may actually stimulate your mind. I know where I'm putting my money.
the wrong figure for Bush Iraqi body count
This says we've really lost 1188
"If a soldier is completely dismembered by a bomb, then he is dead. Likewise, if a soldier is hit by a full burst
of machine-gun fire, then he also is dead. The problems start when the medic [on the ground] is not quite sure
whether the injured soldier is dead or not. We all like to save life if possible, so if the medic believes there is the
faintest glimmer of hope, the injured soldier is sent immediately to the nearest [medical] aid station."
"The split-second that soldier is removed from
contact [wherever the incident took place], he is officially listed
as 'wounded', regardless of whether he then dies 3 seconds or minutes or hours or days or months later, as a
direct result of injuries sustained in the contact. Deaths in transit to the U.S., or after soldiers return home are
also excluded completely, or become 'accidental deaths'. This is how Wolfowitz and his people massage the
figures, and how the American public is misled."
Is this why nobody is allowed to see the coffins come home - because someone might count them?
I wish we hade a free press that could look into this possible
I wish the Democrats had the courage to raise this question on live TV.
Am I asking too much?
Subject: radio feedback
I liked the new shows (#26, 27 & 28) although I wondered if you were making that thing up
with Dennis Miller having a monkey on his show. It sounded too weird.
No, I saw it myself - he had a monkey in
The sound quality is much better than the
previous CDs I've gotten from you and I like listening to the news review
with you and Tommy Mack. I'm not interested in downloading the radio show so I'm really glad you're making the
copies available on CD. Also, in doing so, you've picked up another fan. My husband isn't much of a web surfer
but he took the copies of your show to listen to in the car on the way to work and now he's an enthusiastic devotee.
So, keep up the good work and swing that
hammer on Bush!
I can't imagine what will happen to this country if that idiot gets another four years.
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Click Here to send us your review of the most recent show.
When the BCR CDs are sent out, we use the low-tech, environmentally
of packing the CDs in BartCop Manor newspaper pages - it protects the CDs in transit.
Oh sure, we could order some bubble-wrap from Halliburton, but
I figure getting one more
use out of the dead tree before is falls must be a noble cause and an all-round good thing to do.
So this fella writes,
(This is all reconstructed from a week-old memory)
"Bart, the CDs were fun to hear, but I notice
the paper that wrapped the CDs had articles circled,
and these were the same rants you talked about on your radio shows and I thought that was kinda cool."
So, ... if you order some BCR CDs, you might
get some Smithsonian-worthy packaging at no additional cost.
Haven't you always wanted your name in the Smithsonian?
If so, you have nothing to lose by ordering your BCR CDs today!
Impress your friends!
That gorgeous minx who won't even look at you at school or at work?
She's wet sauercraut in your hands once she knows you have BCR CDs.
Chicks - they dig men who fight back.
Subject: Monkey-slapping money
I thought I was broke, but I was just surfing
and found out that -- thanks to
George Dumbya Bush -- Clinton's deep recession, plunging stock market and soaring unemployment
have finally been brought under control and the economy is booming again.
Anyway, with things going so good, I figure
ought to be able to send you fifty bucks once in a while.
You sure earn it.
You are to monkey-slapping what Kenyans are to marathons.
Which is one more reason why I hope you... NEVER QUIT!!
Fort Smith Ray is so much a pillar, we need to invent a new word
for people in his stratosphere.
Thanks, Dude - I will not quit.
Kerry says foreign leaders pulling for him
Without naming anybody, Kerry said he had received words of encouragement from
leaders abroad who were eager to see him defeat Bush on Nov. 2.
"I've met foreign leaders who can't go out and
say this publicly, but boy they look at you and say,
'You've got to win this, you've got to beat this guy, we need a new policy,' things like that," he said.
Are you kidding?
Everyone outside of the US media influence wants the murdering monster to lose in November.
Every nation is more afraid of Bush than bin Laden and al Qaeda.
If Bush's good puppy press ran the stories and pictures the rest
of the world sees,
the "Impeach Bush" crowd would be in the 80 percent range.
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"In a conversation with Bush prior to former Senator Chuck Robb's appointment assured the president
he would not support examining the administration's use of intelligence, said a Senate source familiar with the meeting.
"Robb bent over backward to say he did not support looking at the users," said the source.
Bush has made it clear to Robb that he must
keep his distance from Senate Democrats. Robb learned that he
was to be appointed co-chairmen only a few hours before Bush made a public announcement.
And Robb was warned that if he consulted
with Tom Daschle (D-Appeaser) before the announcement,
he would be stripped of his appointment, Senate sources said."
Is Chuck Robb another Lee Hamilton?
Bush only appointed loyal puppies to this commission, so by definition, that includes Robb.
Bush has never been in a fight that wasn't pre-rigged up-front and the 9-11 commission and
the Intel commission were pre-rigged before the appointments were announced.
It's like a juror having to promise he'll vote not guilty
before the trial starts,
and the Democrats, once again, are ready and willing to assist Bush in another crime.
Boy, I have been busier than a busy beaver today.
We put the final touches on the sure-to-be-the-best-so-far
radio show, I got this page
finished in record time and I'm negotiating with some media peeps to get ads for bartcop.com
on the local cable network and maybe even a few on some national shows like Chris the
Screaming Bush Butt-licker or maybe even Crossfire.
They're supposed to get back with me on prices late today.
Now I'm working on Show 31 and tomorrow's oage.
No Excerpt - you have to read it
Click for a great short movie
Editorial by Madison's Capital Times
"President Bush took American political discourse to a new low last week when his re-election campaign
began airing television commercials that exploit the horror and misery of the 9-11 attacks.
'The president's willingness to pick at the still
open wounds of that tragedy in a crass appeal for political
support illustrates the desperation of the man and his political team to cling to power.
'But this time Bush has gone too far."
I was listening to The
Guy James Show today and I'll be darned
if Pat the Pillar didn't call in and thank Guy for running the BartCop Radio samples.
If I'm lucky (and good) I could pick up some readers/subscribers in Ft Myers, Florida.
You can hear the archived version at whiterosesociety.org
Third hour - if you want to hear Pat.
BTW, is there a left-leaning talk show host (stop laughing) in
that might play the occasional G-Rated audio snippet from BCR?
Click Here and put Radio Snips in the header
American soldier body count in Iraq
Bush lied, and caused 551 Americans their lives - and counting.
"Those ads they're running for President Bush
- shouldn't they talk about 9/14 instead of 9/11?
That's when he got to town, right?
When I saw the first ad, I thought Rudy Giuliani was running for President. "
--Mike Lupica, sports dude - I think, no attribution was sent.
Let's all remember that Bill Clinton was in Australia on 9-11
and he beat Bush to New York.
Let's also remember on 9-11, Bush went into hiding like a scared little girl and Giuliani stood tall
and told America we'd get thru this while Bush was hiding, changing his pants every ten minutes.
The gall of the GOP bastards to say Bush was a decisive, aggresive
in-command leader that day,
when the best he could muster was a short message on videotape, like it was shot in some Afghan cave.
If the Democrats had any brains or courage, they'd make him EAT
but no, that wouldn't be polite and Mr Rove might not approve.
Do you have an opinion?
Do any GOP impressions?
Then listen for your call on...
You have two minutes to spit your bit.
"This administration has given billions to
Halliburton and requested $82 million to protect
Iraq's 36 miles of coastline. But they call basic body armor for our troops a `nonpriority' item."
--John Kerry, Attribution
So far, Kerry is saying a lot of the right things.
Keep hammering that Monkey, John, and don't hesitate to call for advice or speech punch-ups.
This might not make the cut, but there must be a dozen
readers who see the difference
between the members page and the page that's presented to the non-members.
Funny, in the maybe-ten months we've had a members page, I can't
recall a time when
someone commented on the difference between the two.
A regular rant might go 150 words.
But the original rant was most likely 250 words and, ...upon reflection, certain paragraphs were
later (meaning the next morning) deemed "not quite publishable," and this practice is almost year old.
Funny, I've never read an mail that said, "Why
did you change 'vicious murder' to 'depraved indifference"
I've never been called on some not-quite-PC reference that wasn't re-worded by the time it hit the page.
And if you think this is just another pitch to get the fence-sitters
to subscribe - it is, but the
members page is the first draft, and sometimes I publish a first draft and then reread it and think,
"Holy Koresh, you can't say that in public - most people can't handle the truth..."
The constant editorial decisions over what-is-acceptable to the general public is a very interesting concept.
I figure the subscribers can be a little more forgiving and take a little more of the truth.
We put $3687 on the credit card for a new Mac G5 and monitor
so Tommy can edit radio shows,
(Hey - I finally bought a Mac! :)
$3678 - cost of new computer.
$3082 - raised.
We're so close to home, I can hear Gary Busey moaning. That means
Mrs Bart has her DVD of
Mel Gibson on an endless loop kicking Busey's ass in Lethal Weapon.
If you would care to help us with the Mac expenses, you
could contribute via PayPal
(Oddly, it helps if you send an abby-normal amount, like $51 instead of $50)
If you prefer the mail, our address is bartcop.com PO Box 54466 Tulsa, OK 74155
Show 29 is up.
Extra thank yous to the subscribers and Mac donators.
Your contributions allow us to continue beating up the Bush monkey and his Nazi gangsters.
The subpoena list of rats
A federal grand jury has subpoenaed White House records on administration contacts
with more than two dozen journalists and news media outlets in a special investigation
into the improper leak of a covert CIA official's identity to Robert Novak last July.
They include a who's who of rat bastards who've been getting leaks
from their buddy Karl Rove.
Novak, Andrea Mitchell, Chris the Screamer, Russert the Whore and more.
You don't see the name 'Helen Thomas' on that list because she's nobody's whore.
offers $10K to anyone
who saw Bush show up in the ANG
Click for reward details
How about an audio excerpt, instead?
The Monkey made a few false claims so I made him eat 'em.
BCR Show 30 is in the oven - cooking - but here's a lick off the spoon.!
Click Here to listen to the Monkey chew
Use this portal
and they'll throw bartcop.com four cents.
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Wesley Clark Betty Bowers & more John Kerry Michael Moore Eric Alterman Kevin Phillips
Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
Copyright © 2004, bartcop.com
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This show could use some 'splainin'
The audio is Parts One and Two is imperfect.
It's plenty listenable, but it sounds more "AM radio" than Parts three thru Six
Tommy's English interview segment closes this show,
but he ran into a 60- year old cyclone named
Ann Doyle who gave Tommy all he could handle - ha ha
Also, Tally the Weather Vixen does a short rant that's probably
the most intelligent bit ever done on the young BartCop Radio Network.
I hope you enjoy Show 30.
Click Here to listen
to Part 1 of Show
Click Here to download Part 1 of Show 29
Click Here to listen
to Part 2 of Show
Click Here to download Part 2 of Show 29
Click Here to listen
to Part 3 of Show
Click Here to download Part 3 of Show 29
Click Here to listen
to Part 4 of Show
Click Here to download Part 4 of Show 29
Click Here to listen
to Part 5 of Show
Click Here to download Part 5 of Show 29
Click Here to listen
to Part 6 of Show
Click Here to download Part 6 of Show 29
Click Here to listen
to Part 7 of Show
Click Here to download Part 7 of Show 29
Here for the radio archives
If your GOP workplace doesn't want you to
see the truth, use these mirrors.
Shrl, call The BartPhone,
just to say "Hi!"
Plus, leave an e-mail address and I'll make you a BartCop Member - for free!
You can call the Bart-Phone at 918-493-1500
That would be really cool, and we'll catch you at The Joint on your next American tour.
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