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Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Quote of the Day
"You know that this is all a theater by Bush,
"I agree that I was a small little entity in
this big vast whatever-you-want-to-call-it that got erected."
--Paula Jones, on ABC with Cynthia McFadden, Attribution
Jones didn't even want to file this Scaiffe-financed lawsuit.
She got talked into it the last day before the statute of limitations was to run out.
The anti-Democrat Supreme Court thought it would be cute for a no-proof claim
to tie the president's hands while he was chasing Al Qaeda.
Jones eventually settles for less than her attorney's fees.
Militants Claim Marine Beheading
...but the media will let Bush off the hook again
"We would like to inform you that the Marine of Lebanese descent has been killed,
and you will soon see the movie with your own eyes," said the statement, signed in
the name of the group's leader, Abu Abdullah al-Hassan bin Mahmoud.
Prime Minister Iyad Allawi's fledgling government may offer amnesty to Iraqi insurgents
and perhaps pardon those who killed Americans. Attribution
I don't think the Marines are going to like that pardon talk.
"Sacrifices have to be made.
We need to focus on the
money to be made over there."
Care to comment?
"What we're trying to do here is to tell the
administration ... not only see [Moore's movie]
but then come out ... and explain why this happened, why we went to Iraq and why 9/11 happened."
--Ivan Medina, former Marine who served in Iraq and whose twin brother was killed there, Attribution
They pretend Bush is a "war president," but he can't even face
the country and explain
his deadly lies without getting a prepared script from Snarl or Kinda Sleazy Rice.
Must Release List of Ineligible Voters
Did Kerry just win Florida?
Florida must release a list of suspected felons it wants purged from voter registration rolls
so the names can be checked to avoid errors that wrongly disenfranchised voters in the
state's disputed 2000 election, a state judge ruled on Thursday. CNN, ABC and other
news and civil rights groups sued to get copies of the list in order to check its accuracy
before November's presidential election.
...and no doubt, the Jeb bastards fought this sunlight issue hard,
hard, hard so they could
pull the same shit this year that they pulled in 2000 to illegally install the Giggling Murderer.
Get Your War On, (c) 2004 by David Rees. Used with permission
Not reported yet in any news agency, the
Estate Of Christopher Wallace ( PKA The Notorious BIG)
just defeated the City of Los Angeles in the City's efforts to keep the family from getting their day in court.
The court ruled that sufficient evidence
exists to let a jury determine if the former LAPD officer, David Mack,
used his "color of law" authority to help kill BIGGIE. The case is set to go to trial in October of this year.
Crooked cops are always bad news.
Crooked cops involved in murder are even worse.
I think L.A. is about to write a very large check to Mrs Wallace.
Rodney King got $13M, if I remember correctly, and he's still alive
The networks will have this in 48 hours.
Care to comment?
Bush on the Couch
by Justin Frank
as heard on the O'Franken Factor Friday
Click to Order
"I'm disappointed that the movie would be attacked
just because Moore wants to consider the questions."
--April Gallop, a Pentagon employee injured on 9/11 Attribution
I still haven't seen any negatoive reviews from someone who has
seen the movie.
The right wing echo chamber says, "It's all lies," but they said that before it was released.
Why are they afraid to face the truth?
Ok....so I bluffed.....this isn't about
poker it's about the new Shirley pics you have added.
WOW! I have reason again to scroll all the way to the bottom of the page.
Oh yeah, the one with her on the saddle...it's my new wallpaper!
Shirley Manson has the sexiest brain in music.
Marty's Entertainment Page
Deal made with Air America Radio
We're going to flood the airwaves July 7th, a Wednesday.
They've been paid and we have a schedule.
From 6AM NY time to 10, we'll have five commercials.
From 10 to NOON, we'll have one commercial.
From NOON to 3PM , we'll have four commercials.
From 3 NY time to 7PM, we'll have five commercials.
your best stuff on your page Tuesday nightand
for your ad and write down the time and let us know - and be sure to mention your time zone.
Make big bucks!
Also, if you get on the AAR air that day, July 7, between
6 AM and 7 PM NY time,
and mention you read bartcop.com or ask the host if they've seen it, you will win:
a year subscription to BCR,
$100 worth of stuff from The Bart Store
Remember, it's not each time you say it, so don't call in and
say "bartcop.com" ten times,
just be nice and mention bartcop.com once and big prizes are headed your way.
This goes for on-air employees of AAR, too.
Everybody knows the hotties are Democrats
comeback reminds us of better times
by my good friend Larry Durstin in the Cleveland Free Times
People, aside from the hard-core Clinton haters, will realize how good they had it during the
peace-and-prosperity '90s: a time when our nation's biggest political concern was oral sex,
and not the 7,000 dead and wounded in Iraq, the historic budget deficits, the loss of two
million jobs, the international approbation and a repressive, shrouded-in-secrecy administration.
...the more the Republicans want to talk
about stained dresses and $200 haircuts, the more Clinton
will let them hang themselves - and the more he'll use his matchless intellect and full-Bubba charm
to make the case that America can certainly do better than George W., a man who couldn't tear
himself away from the reading of My Pet Goat after being informed on 9/11 that a devastating
attack was underway on American soil..
Care to comment?
Some people can't read, like the Monkey president.
But if you can read, you'll find the right books here
and it's all just a click away.
Subjhect: Show 45
Fuck Margaret Carlson! What a total retro-repub
bitch she's become.
I've had the same opinion of her for some time now. She does more stammering,
empty-headed babbling than Bob Kerrey did during his lame-ass interrogation of
Rice at the 9/11 commission hearings.
Bob Traitor Novak ought to be hauled up
before the Plame grand jury and if the bastard
refuses to come clean he should do some of that Susan McDougal contempt of court EXTRA HARD
time that he delighted in when she refused to drop her pants for that ultra-worm bastard Starr.
I bet Novak won't be able to do 2 fucking
years in leg irons like she was forced to do.
He'll be crapping his silk drawers in two days and singing like Nelson Eddy on crack.
I like the tone of this show, Bart, and
if some of your subscribers can't handle it, let them
subscribe to Jerry Falwell's radio show. We've had a belly full of these bastards, Bart,
and it's long past time to whip out the really BIG hammer.
Love you man,
Job Growth Slows Down in June
But the media will still say Bush's economy is super-strong
of all time" cruises past one million sold
Public soaking up Big Dog's book like a hungry sponge
Rights Act Hailed 40 Years Later
This is why Reagan/Newt/Thurmond Lott etc left the Democratic party
Volunteer for GOP Convention
Is it a Demo trick? Nah, that wouldn't be polite...
Contest for increased subscriptions ideas
Attrition is eroding the subscriber base.
I think sometimes people get a notice that their $5 or $10 contribution has gone thru,
and they worry that they might not be able to crack the nut on this month's expenses.
Also, I got this e-mail:
I would like to end my subscription, not
because of any displeasure -- far from it
-- just because it's time to move on.
Looks to me like the Bush Cartel is toast,
at least the W. regime.
People are now saying what you were a long time ago.
Thanks for being a voice of sanity crying in wilderness.
Nothing is over - all Bush needs is a terror strike and scared
people will reward him
for chasing Saddam instead of Al Qaeda - and he'll win for getting us killed.
So, we need some ideas - how to increase subscribers.
If we use your idea, we'll give you a free year of membership.
If you're already a member, you can pick $50 worth of stuff from The Bart Store
email@example.com if you have any ideas
"I don't remember having sex with a
white, skinny hotel girl..."
--Chris Rock, on being the background audio in the Paris Hilton sex tape Attribution - on Conan Thursday night
the dork sings "YMCA" at Asian Security Conf.
Osama better be afraid - or Colin will sing to him
He dances white, he lies white
JAKARTA, Indonesia - Colin Powell donned a hard hat and whiteface makeup, then tucked a hammer
in his belt Friday, performing the Village People's hit "YMCA" at Asia's largest security meeting.
Tradition dictates that the meeting wrap up with a night of song and dance, provided by the diplomats themselves.
I guess we should be glad tradition didn't involve a tube of KY, a pony and the Indian Rope Trick
Click to Order
Joe, send your e-mail address to Sam@bartcop.com
and we'll set you up with some free BartCop Radio
Shows What 'Mainstream' Leftism Is About These Days
I've pointed out many times over the last
couple of years how kooky the 'mainstream' left has gotten.
Here's another great example, I grabbed this image off of the front page of Bartcop's Political Humor....
Wow, that is some political humor isn't
it? So who's this Bartcop who posts these "hilarious" graphics?
Some flake with 12 people reading his website? Oh no, quite the opposite.
A few months ago when I did the 100 Of The
Most Popular Political Websites On The Net, he weighed in
at a very respectable #56 & today his Alexa rank is an exceptional #26,147. Furthermore, he is linked on
prominent left-wing blogs & websites like Eschaton, Eric Alterman: Altercation, BuzzFlash, & The Agonist.
So Bartcop's warped perception of reality
may be a minority view on the left, but it's pretty hard to argue
that they're "fringe" views. Look at the traffic he gets, look at the people who link him -- this isn't a guy who's
perceived as a kook on the left. That's not just scary, it's actually sad..
First thing, I wrote back and asked if anybody at rightwingnews.com had the cajones to debate.
Second, that graphic is from 9-19-03, from Volume 1159.
Under the graphic I wrote:
Bush is innocent, why is he blocking all investigations into 9-11?
Would evil men allow thousands to be murdered to take over the world?
I guess he didn't have the time to include that.
Lastly, I can't prove Bush "did" 9-11 and neither can Mo Paul,
the graphic's artist, but we know
the BFEE is lying about 9-11, and since they refuse to let us see the records, we can only assume
they're hiding something, probably something that would get Bush impeached or imprisoned.
Just wanted to say excellent work.
Issue 1347 had me laughing out loud.
The radio shows continue to get better and
And they're coming so fast I am 2 and a half shows behind.
Brian, thanks for that.
Do you know that for the first 4-5 years of bartcop.com I refused to print positive feedback?
I'd delete flattering sentences from e-mails before I'd publish then - they bothered me.
But as the years go by, ... I'm starting to develope a tolerance
Subject: BCR Show 44
You are definitely hitting your stride.
Your run of shows 40-44 is what I've been paying for.
In my humble opinion, you beat most of what
I'm hearing on Air America Radio.
I'm getting a little tired of their "I'm the lesbian/I'm the rapper/I'm Jewish/I'm whateverthefuck I am" routine.
They gotta quit slapping and start hitting.
They need a hammer.
They need BARTCOP!
Keep swinging, man.
Bob, in the heart of the K-Drag of the South (South Cackalakee)
Order your CDs today!
These play in your car or laptop - like magic!
Click Here to get BartCop Radio CDs for just $24
Currently shipping shows
43 (The one where Bart sings)
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BCR 45 (Language most Americans use)
Click Here to send your review of Show 45
"A US MP asked me this morning what police
division I was in. I said I was in criminal intelligence.
The American asked me why we had beaten the prisoners. I said we beat the prisoners because they are
all bad people. But I told him we didn't strip them naked, photograph them or fuck them like you did."
--Nashwan Ali - "US raids Iraqi detention centre to stop abuse of prisoners" Attribution
What a joke - American forces want to stop prison abuse?
We have no credibility in the world because of America's Murderer.
Subject: Why don't they sue?
Thank you for your excellent site. I read it every day.
My question is this, if Moore's film is
full of lies and untrue attacks on individual character,
why doesn't someone or anyone sue for slander, libel and/or defamation of character?
Moore, the Weinstein brothers, IFC and Lion's
Gate could all be held responsible.
Maybe there is some protection under the First Amendment or creative license I don't know.
Hoping you or your sources can help.
Keep up the great work.
Jimi, they can't sue because in America, the truth is a defense against libel and slander
you on Florida's Voter Felon List?
If you're white and rich, you're on the list
The Supervisor of Elections in each Florida county has the list, and may use it as part of the basis
to purge voters from the registration rolls. The state has admitted, however, that there may very well
be errors on the list. For example, the Miami Herald reported on July 2 that there are more than 2100
voter names erroneously on the list because they have received clemency and their rights have been restored.
Others erroneously on the list may well never have been convicted of a felony at all.
You know they're going to try it again.
Don't let them screw you a second time!
Saddam Rejects War Crimes Charges
Who killed more Iraqis lately - Saddam or America's giggling madman?
A defiant Saddam rejected charges of war crimes and genocide in court
Thursday, telling a judge "this is all theater, the real criminal is Bush."
"I am Saddam Hussein, the president of Iraq," Saddam said twice.
In his first public appearance since he
was captured seven months ago,
Saddam refused to sign a list of charges against him unless a lawyer was
present, and he questioned the court's jurisdiction.
"Please allow me not to sign until the lawyers
are present. ... Anyhow, when you take a
procedure to bring me here again, present me with all these papers with the presence of lawyers.
Why would you behave in a manner that we might call hasty later on?" he said.
Saddam, don't take it personally.
When you're arrested in America, you don't get an attorney either.
I just read your piece on Google's advertising
department placing the ads of Michael Moore's detractors
and liars on top of their pages. I have first hand evidence that you are ABSOLUTELY right about this.
I used the keywords "Michael Moore" for
the past 2 weeks to advertise my site to Democrats looking up
Michael Moore. In the first 3 days, I was calling Google several times a day to say "WHERE ARE MY ADS?"
They would punch in my keywords and say
"sure enough, your ad is not coming up, let me see why"
... they would go away for a while and come back with no answer - they "didn't know" why my ads weren't there.
Then the ad would magically appear for a little while - once this happened while I was on the phone with the guy.
They never stayed up long though. This happened
over and over again. There was nothing wrong with my ads,
and they were paid for, so I have come to the conclusion that those in the upper level of the Google ad department
were pulling my ads in order to run the "Michael Moore Hates America", and "Anti-God Democrats" ads, which
showed up in the top spots without fail every time I searched for "Michael Moore".
Coincidence? I don't think so...
David - Democratic Singles.Net
Funny how businesses fail to get that when they skew for the GOP, they shut out the majority - the Democrats.
"The widespread view is that American leadership
is something to be feared, not embraced.
This was a war of aggrandizement, this was a war to impose upon the world a vision.
Now that vision has ... met the harsh realities of Iraq."
--Ambassador Joseph Wilson, punished for telling the truth Attribution
Subject: just keeps getting better
I read you every day--also Marty----and
am officially addicted. Today's page is probably the best ever.
The photo of Shirley is just plain wonderful. Am saving it with my "family" photo's. Wish I could send
some dollars (and will in the future) but right now a drug bill of over $250 a month is cutting down on my
disposable income. Sometime run a short article about why you can get drugs cheaper in Canada:
We did a thing about that on the radio show.
I heard someone say, probably on AAR, that they paid like $100 a month for Taiwan-made drugs
in Memphis, but went to Canada and bought the same drug from Pzifer and it was like $40.
Because of the BFEE, you can buy American
drugs in Canada CHEAPER
than you can buy Taiwan drugs in the United States.
The billions of dollars between Taiwan lows and American highs go to the BFEE!
If I'm wrong, why doesn't somebody straighten
The reason is that the government put a
cap on the drug companies who sell to pharmacies and follow thru
with caps on the pharmacies. At least that is how I understand it---probably over-simplified.
Anyway---keep up the good work.
Saw Fahrenheit 9/11---already knew everything in it from reading Bartcop but liked it.
I only wished it had been a bit more aggressive but maybe I am getting way too cranky in my old age.
You are my hero.
I'm no hero.
I just have a modem, a smart mouth and the truth.
Up to twenty views per penny.
Nobody gives you a better deal that that.
Subject: Making a difference
Thank you Bartman.
The biggest difference I think everyone
can make is to go out and volunteer for their local Democrats for Congress.
This is where the rubber meets the road and volunteers can make a serious difference. It's obviously much more
important if your incumbent is a Republican. We need to tip the balance of power here, and if there's any hope
of holding this regime accountable for their many crimes, it's by electing more Dems than Repugs.
Chimp might be able to steal a couple more states this time, but if we have the House, he'll be in for a world of hurt.
"Dick Cheney was at the ball game last night.
During the 7th inning they showed him
on the jumbotron at Yankee Stadium and everyone started booing him. You know Cheney
has a temper. He went a little crazy and went around the stadium and grabbed everyone
that booed him and then he ran them all around naked on a leash."
"Strip him, hood him,
and bring me four angry dogs..."
Subject: bartcop.com and Michael Moore
In Volume 492 - Smirky's Fake I.D., you published this picture of me & my banner at the coronation for the lil' dictator-
Wow, that's almost a thousand issues back...
Well, there's now another place you can
see that banner besides my basement-
It shows up at the beginning of Fahrenheit 9/11...look for it-
Good work, Dude.
Stern's influence could help Kerry
"By re-engaging those voters, Howard Stern could literally be one of the two or three things
that turns the election this year,'' said Simon Rosenberg, who heads the New Democrat Network,
which commissioned the survey by Penn, the pollster to Bill Clinton. "You've got a guy whose
Web site gets 8.5 million hits a day. And ... it's virtually all anti-Bush.
"In an election which could be won or lost by
1 or 2 percentage points,'' he said, "you've got a guy
who has an unbelievably loyal following of swing voters who has radicalized his audience against the president.''
Click to Enter
Chicago Pokerfest - July 17
Here is a list of people who are officially "in" Pokerfest Chicago.
If your name's not on the list, you're not in yet.
Click Here for the important updates.
"Saddam is not even a defendant; he is a hostage."
--Rush Limbaugh Attribution
Since the U.S. military is now in the murder and torture business,
it follows that
we'd get in the hostage business, too - but why would Rush admit that?
Bush's American soldier body count in Iraq
863 dead American soldiers.
Drip, drip, drip - young lives go down the drain for Bush's illegal war.
Soon it will be 900,
and sometime before the election, it will be 1000.
Bush can depend on the American whore media
to spin this into a "this isn't so bad" handjob.
Subject: The transfer of power...
"It's amazing that you find the belief
in God such a far-fetched and ignorant idea
but you believe in anything that makes a "neo-con" look bad.
No, one is a fairy tale of nonsense and
the other is an illegal fascist scheme for the BFEE to
gain control of all of Earth's energy sources and the American plantation, and I fight that shit full time now.
The transfer of power was done early in
the morning our time but it was mid morning in Iraq.
Explain how that was done in the cover of night to the Iraqi people?
Three out of four monkeys would agree they
did the transfer in darkness.
They "cloaked" the ceremony by doing it behind closed doors two days early.
It's like telling your landlord you'll pay him next Wednesday, then moving out on next Tuesday.
Watching you rant on the internet and on your half-ass radio show (haha)
Zeb, I want you to know - my radio show
has a full ass.
Besides, unless you're a subscriber - you've never heard BCR besides selective snippetts.
You don't have any goddamn idea in the world what you're talking about.
You're one of those, "I didn't see it, but I hate it!" guys.
How'd you like Michael Moore's movie?
--- ha ha
...that was a trick!
...is like watcing an retarded kid [an
retarded kid?] go into the regular classes
and then trying to tell the teacher what the right answers are.
If I had the money, I'd pay someone to go
thru the back issues and count
some handjob monkey has stumbled into a bartcop.com mailbox, breathing boastful fire
about how bad and evil Ol' Bart is, but when it comes time to whip it out, the overly-aggressive
ditto-monkey turns into some lily-assed wallflower who "doesn't have time" to debate.
How many more years must Bart wait to meet a Bush/Rush apologist?
Why are they afraid to debate?
I guess they have to keep the cabinets locked in your house or you will drink the bleach.
Yeah, you got me there...
It is bleach, by the way, not "Super liberal
Christ, I've been in the net since 3/95,
and you might be settting a record
as the ditsiest fuck to make the publishing cut in the history of this page.
Do you have an opinion?
Do any GOP impressions?
Then listen for your call on...
You have two minutes to record your message.
"illegal" GOP backers
by Joe Conason
A Washington watchdog group is charging that Ralph Nader's presidential campaign
benefited from "illegal" assistance provided by right-wing organizations -- at the behest
of his supposed opponents in the Bush-Cheney campaign.
According to Citizens
for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington -- whose name sounds
as if Nader could once have been its founder -- the Nader presidential campaign received
illicit assistance for its petition drive in Oregon last weekend from two local conservative
organizations, which were "encouraged" by President Bush's campaign committee.
Cheating to win?
Nader is becoming more GOP all the time.
Subject: Show 45 feedback
I'm listening to show 45 right now. Dude,
I love the new format.
If your readers haven't heard it yet, check it out, but make sure the kiddies are not around.
Bart is on a rampage, and no whore, or slut,
will be spared.
(And god knows theres so many of them around.)
Keep up the great work Bart.
See you in Chi-Town
Play Poker online with Bart
Use this portal
and they'll send bartcop.com
Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
Copyright © 2004, bartcop.com
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If your GOP workplace doesn't want you to
see the truth, use these mirrors.
Shirley Manson of the rock group "Garbage."
Shrl, call The BartPhone,
just to say "Hi!"
Plus, leave an e-mail address and I'll make you a BartCop Member - for free!
You can call the Bart-Phone at 918-748-1714
That would be really cool, and we'll catch you at The Joint on your next American tour.
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