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 Weekend-Monday  May 13-15, 2006   Volume 1764 - Rove Indicted!

Quote of the Day

"AT&T has a long history of vigorourly
  protecting consumer pribacy. Our customers 
  expect and deserve nothing less than our
  fullest commitment to their privacy...but..."
    -- AT&T, caving in to Bush, 

In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Bush's Big Blunder 
Not Good Enough
Bush Lied Twice 
Father, Son Reunion 
Get your hummer 
Clinton beats Bush
Bush at 29 % 
Blacks are Inferior? 
Lindsay Lohan's Luck





"USA Today better hire good lawyers. Remember that Bush has vowed to use espionage
  statutes to prosecute reporters who report on leaked "national security" issues.
  Spying on citizens and prosecuting reporters -- that's so Soviet."
       --  Joe Sudbay,   Link


Bush's 'Big Brother' Blunder
  by Robert Parry  as seen on  consortiumnews.com


Bush's warrantless phone data collection may not only violate the U.S. Constitution but expend so much
money and manpower that America is made less safe - by diverting resources away from more practical steps,
like inspecting cargo and hiring translators.

Yet, because the operation is wrapped in layers and layers of secrecy - based on the dubious argument that
al-Qaeda might not realize it's being spied on - the public doesn't know how much the project costs,
who's getting contracts and whether it does any good.

So far, however, what administration officials and computer experts have been willing to describe shouldn't give
Americans much confidence that their trade-off of Fourth Amendment freedoms for a little extra safety is a good deal.

The project's designers say the NSA's trillions of phone records from calls made by some 200 million Americans
is intended to seek out "patterns" from conversations involving alleged terrorists and then to apply the digital outline
to the stockpiled records

Bart's opinion: I have long suspected that Bush made Osama a deal:
"Don't attack the US mainland and we won't come after you."

This would allow Bush to steal hundreds of billions of dollars while bringing in dozens of friends, contributors and
defense contractors to split up America's wealth in super-secrecy.  If ever pressed for details about the missing trillions,
all Bush has to say is, "America has not been attacked since 9-11," and it's a win-win for the terrorist teams.

Any other scenario would have to say Al Qaeda is incapable of stealing a gasoline truck and plowing it into 
Radio City Music Hall or the Mall of America or the gates to Disney World, which could paralyze American.
(Would you take your kids to those three places after Al Qaeda bombed them?)

Instead of doing that, they'd rather do a suicide attack in Tikrit and kill six local cops?

The only logical explanation is Al Qaeda chooses not to attack us - and what would explain that?

Bush stays in power, with an excuse to steal for another 3 years
and Osama stays free to recruit thousands more wacko suiciders.

Nothing else comes close to explaining it.

Note: Consortiumnews.com  is the most important site in the Internet



"Clinton prosecutor Robert Ray has been charged with stalking an ex-girlfriend.
  Now, if they would only find Ken Starr in a hot-tub with a naked boy..."
      -- Maru,    Link

"I like my boys hot, young and pink."

"Me, too, but I'm the top."

"Me, too, but I'm an underbear."

"Me, too, with a little poker on the side."

"Me, too, but don't tell my wife."


'Trust us' isn't good enough
  Whore USA Today turns on Der Monkey?


Bush told the public Thursday in a brief appearance aimed at quelling the instant outrage provoked by the story.
He assured Americans that their civil liberties were being "fiercely protected" and that the government was
"not mining or trolling through the personal lives of millions of innocent Americans."

In other words, never mind appearances. Trust us.
Well, that is not all it means.
Nor can the president's promise to protect privacy be reliably kept.

The fact that the government is trying to track (but not wiretap) every call you make and every call you receive
at home or on your cellphone is, to say the least, disturbing.

It means that your phone company (if you are a customer of AT&T, BellSouth or Verizon) tossed your privacy
to the wind and collaborated with this extraordinary intrusion, and that it did so secretly and without following any court order.

That is, unless you're lucky enough to be served by Qwest, the one major phone company that resisted government pressure.


Karl Rove Indicted
 The networks are ignoring this


Rove told Bush that he will be indicted and will resign when Fitz announces the charges against him
Fitzgerald told Rove that he has 24 hours to get his affairs in order.

It was still unknown Saturday whether Fitzgerald charged Rove with a more serious obstruction of justice charge.
It appeared very likely that an obstruction charge against Rove would be included.

     "I'll tell - Bush knew everything - He was in the loop!"

Again, I'm going to ask the Democrats to publicly tell Bush that he can
pardon his co-conspirators, but only after the trial - but they don't listen.

They're going to act like eunuch sheep and then be "disappointed" in Bush
when he buries the truth before the scope of their crimes becomes clear.

          "It's not our place to interfere with King George!"


Subject: Phone data mining

The administration's reassurance about the phone number record business is crap.
All the bad guys have to do is use disposable phones.
 S B

Dude, good point.
Too bad the Democrats can't be convinced to point that out.



"I'm not sure what I'm going to read next. I've got a choice of a
  history of Afghanistan or there's an interesting book on Timbuktu."
    -- President Stupid and Crooked, who has Condi read to him, Link


Father & Son Reunion
 Bush ending up like his failed father


One Bush did it by staying out of Baghdad, raising taxes and driving down the deficit. The other Bush
did it by going into Baghdad, cutting taxes and driving up the deficit. But, perhaps inevitably, the father and son
ended up in an Oedipal tango at the same spot: 31 percent. After trying not to emulate his father's presidency
in any way, W. emulated it in the worst possible way. He came out of a conflict with Saddam as a towering
figure with soaring approval ratings and ended up as a shrunken figure with scalding approval ratings."


Bartcop Flashback



Subject: Switching phone companies

Bart, I just switched my long distance carrier to Qwest,
unfortunately I am stuck with Bellsouth for local service.

It would be interesting to track how many people switch to Qwest
because of their stand against the BFEE. Nothing like people voting
with their feet, and their wallets to scare the living fuck out of the Corps.



Get your two minutes on BartCop Radio

Bush lovers welcome to call
Spankings are free



"As democracy is perfected, the office of  president represents, more and more closely,
 the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will
 reach their heart's desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron."
       -- H.L. Mencken (1880-1956) who never even knew who Der Monkey was


Subject: immigration


As Randy Rhodes said,
"If Mexicans want to take our jobs they should go to India, that's where they are."

The current view is that they are willing to do the jobs Americans won't, which is pure horseshit.
If picking celery was $20 plus per hour, you'd see boat loads of Americans doing it.

The usual a-hole response is "grocery prices will sky rocket." 
Well yeah (Duh!)
It's market forces, capitalism at work.

If you want to include semi-slave labour in capitalism scenarios
then don't bitch at the immigrants.



Latest Poll: Bush at 29 Percent


Bush's job-approval rating has fallen to its lowest mark of his presidency, according to Harris poll.
29% think Mr. Bush is doing an "excellent or pretty good" job as president, down from 35% in April.

Roughly one-quarter of U.S. adults say "things in the country are going in the right direction,"
while 69% say "things have pretty seriously gotten off on the wrong track."

No wonder the GOP is worried about November..
Do the Democrats realize Bush is vulnerable now?

I suggest they filibuster hayden just to call Bush's bluff on the "nuclear" option
of killing all filibusters if the minority party ever tries to use it.


Subject: a simple question

OK, it's hypothetical.
But let's just say that the Dem nominee in 08 is Joe Lieberman and the repug nominee is Guilianni.
Who are you voting for?


Scott, that's not a simple question.
I would know before voting day, but yes, that would be tough.
Rudy might be to Lieberman's left on some issues...


Subject: comment from a fan

To my mind there is no difference between the two parties. I suspect we have a monster with two heads, installed by
a slow moving coup,  running our government. All the current players are tainted by association with this monster.
In order to have a Constitutional government, we need to go back to the Constitution and re-form our government...

<much snippage>

Thanks for your response.

Sue, I don't know anyone who disagrees with you, but saying, "If only things were this way..."
isn't going to help us get rid of the Giggling Murderer who is strangling the throat of this country.

I think it's more practical to deal with reality.

I only see two options:
Slap the 49% party into taking some action
Work a few decades (goodbye, America) to bring the 2% party to a competitive level.

Is there a third option?
Please don't send me War and Peace or 50 links.


Visit   funnytimes.com

Military Recruiter: We want gays - maybe
 All you non-patriotic gays need not apply


A recruiter for the Army responded with an email to a civilian comment by denying that gay linguists
were ever discharged from the military and asserting that the claim was a propaganda effort to paint
Arab individuals as gay.  In the same email the recruiter encouraged "patriotic gays" to enlist in the Army.

"The recruiter does not speak for the United States Army," Major Nathan Banks, an Army Spokesman.
The emails from the recruiter were sent from his US military email account.

But wait, isn't it legal for recruiters to lie to get stupid kids to sign up?
Aren't they free to promise you anything, only to screw you once you're ensnared?


 Subject: Glenn Beck douchebag

Bart, you published:

> Glenn Beck is the biggest douchebag I've ever, and I mean EVER, heard on the radio.
> The fact he has a radio show makes one aware of the number of  morons in the USA.

> I enjoy your site.
> Dan in Miami

Tell Dan that the guy is on tv now, douchebag can't even begin to describe this moron.
I have watched for a while, because you need to watch what the enemy is up to, but had to look away.
Couldn't take it.



The net's best advertising deal

 advertise on  bartcop.com

More People Say 9-11 Report is Fiction
 Nobody believes the 'Official" version


Why anyone would believe this administration's explanation of Sept. 11 is beyond me. These people have
lied about pretty much everything else. Every single pretense for their invasion of Iraq has been shown to be false,
amounting to another painstakingly constructed alternate reality. In fact, we are rapidly approaching a day of
particularly twisted irony--later this year, the American death toll in Bush's irrelevant (to Sept. 11, anyway)
and morally indefensible war will surpass that of Sept. 11 itself.

But, thankfully, Bush's reality dam is breaking.

A 2004 Zogby poll showed that half of New Yorkers believe our government was complicit in 9-11.
Apparently, they know a bit more about what went on in their city that day than the rest of us. In Canada,
where their media provides them with something approximating news, the number rises to 63 percent.




"In 2005, the top ten oil companies spent $33 million
  lobbying Congress and the Bush administration."
     -- Think Progress,    Link

 And Exxon-Mobil, all by themselves, made $36 billion  in profit.
 That's over 1,000 times more than the bribe money they gave out....


Subject: Dear AT&T

Hi, I just wanted to let you know I'm canceling my AT&T service
because you  bastards  sold my private information to the NSA.

This is illegal and I hope you  bastards  go to jail for it.
You  bastards should be ashamed of yourselves for playing into these Nazi  bastard's  hands.
You  bastards  are no better than they are AND you  bastards sold it for a profit
so you  bastards are A-1 Corporate Criminals.

I'm taking my business to Working Assets.

Note: 'bastards'  provided by Bart


Marty's Entertainment Page

always has good stuff.

Last Chance for a Hummer


The 2006 Hummer will be the last that GTM builds, it was announced Friday.
The Hummer H1, the hulking, gas-guzzling status symbol that has attracted celebrities
and off-road enthusiasts but has drawn the ire of environmentalists.


This Week's South's Finest Chocolate Quiz

          Click to order  Chocolate
           Tell them "Bart says hey"

The first person to answer last issue's quiz correctly was    _____________ .

He/she won a pound of South's Finest Chocolate, the best ever.

 I know that, Bart!

NBC, CNN Whoring for Bush


NBC's Lisa Myers and CNN's David Ensor both asserted that data collected by the NSA through a
just-exposed program include only "phone calls made and received, but not customers' names and addresses."
But they failed to inform viewers about a key point made by USA Today, which broke the story -- that the
NSA can easily obtain this information through other databases.

Another point - I saw a cryptographer (maybe) on CNN saying every encrption program
you can buy has already been broken by the NSA.

BTW, if Bush wanted to put cameras and microphones in every room of your house,
that would be OK with the GOP because, "If you're not doing anything wrong, why complain?"


Subject: you-know-who in '08

Bart, one of the things that people forget about having "her" as president is that it's the only way
to get bill back into the white house.  don't think for a second that he won't be personally involved
in a lot of important decisions.  he will be running the country again, and he might be the only man
who can straighten this country back out again.

Andy in Balmore


Subject: t-shirt arrived

Hey Bart,

My WPE  t-shirt arrived today.
I will wear it with pride.

Keep swinging that hammer on my way to the camps.


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These are the highest quality yada yada shirts ever!

Don't settle for any "WPE" shirt you see - these are the real deal
and they're free with a mere $21 (or more) donation.

Tell the world you don't like the bastard

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Tulsa, OK  74155

Best show of the summer?

 Iraq pumps 2,000,000 barrels a day,
(and that was before the 2002 Halliburton Upgrade)
 times today's oil price which is $72.04 a barrel
makes $144,080,000 Bush stole just yesterday

...add to that, Iran pumps FOUR M barrels a day.

Once the sick bastard invades, that's 6 M barrels a day
times today's oil price which is  $72.04 a barrel
makes $432,240,000 dollars Bush will steal daily

No wonder they were so eager to start a war


...and what did it cost us?

2436  2437 soldiers


Clinton was better than Bush
 Duh - and did the cow also go "Moo?"


In a new poll comparing the Giggling Murder Monkey to a real president,
a strong majority of respondents said Clinton outperformed Bush on a host of issues.

Respondents favored Clinton by greater than 2-to-1 margins when asked who did a better job at handling
the economy (Clinton 62, Monkey 26) and solving the problems of ordinary Americans (Clinton 62, Bush 25).
Clinton also beat Bush on "more honest as president" and "handling natiponal security."

Clinton was impeached in 1998 over an extramarital affair while Bush's lies killed 2500 soldiers.

Maybe that poll isn't very fair to Bush.
Who knows? 
In another 30 days, his approval could drop to 20 percent.


Subject: Bush and Canadian PM Harper

Bart, too bad Harper is another rob-from-the-poor, kiss-corporate-ass Tory.
I have not had a raise in pay in over ten years.  I don't think I will ever get one.

Meanwhile everything we need to keep body and soul together has gone up.
You can keep my tax break if you will make corporations pay their fair share.

Oooh I made myself laugh.
One less thing for you to do today Bart.

You are the ointment that salves my bleeding liberal heart.
Thanks one million times.


Donate $24 (or more) and get a 

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Random thought...

Think how badly Dennis Miller screwed up.
And Dennis Hopper and Ron Silver and James Woods and all the others.

Most of those guys are still working, but Dennis Miller needs a funeral thrown for him.
He decided to change his career and dedicate his comedy career to defending Bush and his 29% approval.

   "I'm screwed..."


Blacks are Inferior to Whites
 That's what they teach in South Carolina

 'Slavery was a good thing'


"These sorts of things are going to upset people, but the truth can be very upsetting,"  said Brookland-Cayce
High School teacher Winston McCuen. That truth, according to McCuen, is that black people are inferior to whites.

"Intellectually, yes they are," said McCuen. "This has been confirmed over and over, and this is a generalization.
Again, there are some blacks who are more intelligent than individual whites. But as a rule, that is true.
I-Q tests prove it over, and over and over."

News19 asked McCuen, "Do you think slavery in America was a good thing?
"Yes," said McCuen.

You know this guy is a Bush voter.
Will he get to keep his job?


Subject: NSA bastards

I called Verizon this morning to ask for copies of all of my phone records that were given to the NSA.
The supervisor told me this was "top secret information," that she could not provide it to me, and said I
should contact my congressman Phil 'the rubberstamp' English ®.

I told her I would soon be changing phone carriers to one that does not share personal information with
the NSA (ie. Quest).  She told me that Quest has been fined by the government for not providing the information to the NSA.

I suggest people who do business with ATT, Verizon, and Bell South drop them and pick up another company.
Thus the 'cooperating' companies that are not being fined by the government will be fined by their customers
and those paying fines for protecting customer privacy will have more funds to pay their fines.

Keep Hammerin Bart!!!

Rick, they said your records were "top secret" - from your eyes?
Sounds like they're feeding you a load of crap.


 Call the all new, toll-free 
 GOP callers Welcome (snicker)


Grizzly hybrid discovered


DNA confirmed it  The first documented case of a hybrid grizzly-polar bear in the wild.

Tracker Roger Kuptana suspected the hunter he was guiding had shot a hybrid bear last month
after noticing its white fur had brown patches and it had the claws and humped back of a grizzly.
Territorial officials did a DNA test and confirmed that the hybrid was born of a polar mother and grizzly father.

"Their habitats overlap a little bit and their breeding seasons overlap a little bit," a polar bear biologist.
"It's the first time it's known to have happened in the wild."

I have a theory - Global Warming.  The polar caps are getting warmer, the ice fields have turned to ilslands.
Both bears are disoriented and searching for new food sources and, as the biologist said, "overlapping."

Students reading this page in the year 2100 will say, "If the low IQ, ADD Okie knew the problem in 2006,
why the hell didn't the government do something before Earth's eco-systen started to change."


Subject: mining and trolling

Hi Bart, good bulls*&t call on this Monkey line.

> "We're not mining or trolling through the personal lives of millions of innocent Americans."

If you read carefully, all that means is that there are 2 million innocent Americans
whose personal lives are not being trolled through.

As for the other 250 million innocent Americans....
 Peter F

Peter, it reminds me of crooked cops sitting outside a popular black nightclub saying,
"It's not like we're arresting every black couple that comes out."

Right, they're only arresting black people in nice cars.


Lindsay Lohan's "Luck" gets Top, Second, Third, Fourth Place


Mission Colon ($24M), then Poseidon ($20M), then RV ($(M), then Luck ($5M). 

How can she be Hollytwood's top young starlet if she can't open a movie?


Thanks to bartcop.com  subscribers.
I know you work hard for your money, so I take it as
a compliment when you throw some my way each month.

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 It had  everything.

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