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WELCOME TO BARTCOP.COM A modem, a smart mouth and the truthNews and Commentary NOT Approved by Karl Rove, bcause vicious extremists can NOT be appeased.


 Weekend-Monday  May 9-11, 2009  Vol 2332 - Stress Clinic 

Quote of the Day

"Mother's Day is a tough holiday for Rahm Emanuel 
  because he's not used to saying the word 'day' after 'mother."
      -- Obama, best stand-up president ever,   Link

  If you don't get it, Emanuel is always,
 "Mother-effer this" and "Mother-effer that."

In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Arrow Cheney: More Pigboy, Less Powell 
Arrow GOP in the Obama Era HOT
Arrow Dems fighting Obama again HOT
Arrow Alan Keyes, Stuck in Jail  HOT
Arrow Kill Health Care Reform 
Arrow How Dead is the GOP? HOT
Arrow Bristol Palinís New Gig 
Arrow Kelly Ripa still in shape 



In THE THIN WHITE LINE, author Craig DiLouie presents a terrifying vision about how
a pandemic might unfold, focusing on the Canadian experience but relevant to any country.
Reading as if it were a non-fiction book describing a pandemic that has already happened,
THE THIN WHITE LINE presents a realistic, meticulously researched scenario.

"Craig DiLouie provides us with a clairvoyant glimpse of life during the coming influenza pandemic. . . ."
óGrattan Woodson, MD, FACP

Click to Order


"If you gave any U.S. soldier a gun with two bullets in it, and he found himself in an elevator with 
Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, and Osama bin Laden, thereís a good chance that Nancy Pelosi would 
get shot twice, and Harry Reid and bin Laden would be strangled to death." 
     --David Feherty, golf commentator for CBS,     Link

 Does this guy still have a job?

 Much as I dislike Pelosi and Reid I don't want them dead.

   Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

Cheney: More Pigboy, Less Powell
 ...after Powell helped them kill all those soldiers


Cheney said Sunday he preferred the vulgar Pigboy's brand of conservatism to Colin Powell's.

"Well, if I had to choose in terms of being a Republican, I'd go with Rush Limbaugh," Cheney said on "Face the Whore."
"My take on it was Colin had already left the party. I didn't know he was still a Republican," Cheney lied.

Cheney said he "assumed" Powell's support of Obama over McCain was "an indication of his loyalty and his interest."

This just keeps getting better and better.
Yes, throw out all the moderates and just keep the Pigboys, the Coulters and the Savages.
Anyone who's not in lickstep with Captain Oink needs to leave the party and leave it now.

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

 Subject: Del Castillo in Culli-fornya

Dude,  I saw on your site today that Del Castillo will be playing 6 shows in Cal.

I looked it up and the 4th show at The Knitting Factory is right around the corner from where I live. 
Seriously it's like 200 Yards away, so I'll see them for sure.. 

So when you putting Whalefest back on?
Talk to you soon
 Rick the Hollywood Liberal

The whole world is broke right now.
Maybe we'll try a fest once Obama fixes the Bush disaster.

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GOP in the Obama Era


Could the Republican Party have gotten off to a rougher start in the Obama era? It's hard to think so. 
Even with Bush and Cheney gone, the GOP finds its favorability ratings at or near all-time lows.
Despite their enthusiasm for their unified opposition to Obama, they're blamed more for the lack of 
bipartisanship in DC. While starting out with all the advantages in NY-20, they still found a way to lose that race.
Despite the initial positive reaction to his victory as RNC chair, Michael Steele's reign has been, shall we say, 
not good. And holding on to 41 votes in the Senate, they enabled a Republican who proved he could win in 
the increasingly blue state of Pennsylvania to switch parties, giving Dems the prospect of a filibuster-proof majority.

I love running stories about how fuct the GOP is.
But you and I know our Democrats - we're one big screw-up away from being tied again.

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

Erik Organic Furniture

Erik has been advertising on  bartcom.com  since 2002.


"For Notre Dame to give Obama an honorary degree would be like 
  Howard University giving David Duke a degree in racial politics."
     -- Bill Donohue, President of the Catholic League, proving what a right-wing dick he can be,    Link

  What can't the Catholics just be honest and come out and say,
 "We hate liberals and we love war, torture and George W Bush?"

  But then, how stupid am I to ask why Catholics can't be honest?

  ...and they wonder why people are leaving them by the millions. 

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"The White House is rewriting legal contracts, picking winners (mostly labor unions and 
  mortgage defaulters) and singling out losers (evil 'speculators'), while much of the media 
  continue to ponder whether Obama is already a greater president than FDR." 
    --  Jonah Goldberg, still angry that LBJ is his dad,    Link


   Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

 Subject: Carrie Prejean!

OK Bart! 
Get off Carrie's ass about  her T&A shots. 
It ain't got shit to do with her stand on gay marriage. 

She looks great.
She needs to on  your Hottie Page  :-)

When the better-than-you types drop their pants, I punish them.

  Send e-mail to Bart  | Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

Dems fighting Obama again


The $17 billion in planned budget cuts that Obama announced on Thursday isn't all that much money,
but congressional Democrats are already pushing back, hard, against the proposals, and they seem likely to succeed, at least in part...

The Washington Post reports that the fight has already begun. Dianne Feinstein, for instance, wants the money from 
one of the biggest cuts -- $400 million that helps states with the cost of detaining illegal immigrants -- restored. 
Rep. Maurice Hinchey, D-N.Y., is opposing one of the most high-profile of the cuts, the decision not to take delivery 
on a new presidential helicopter, which the president has rejected and which cost over $800 million last year. 
Of course, it also provides hundreds of jobs in Hinchey's district.

When the other football team fails to show up, count on the Democrats to tackle their own quarterback.

I should be used to it by now, but it's never easy watching them stab their own president in the back.


   Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

Mike Malloy Live


"Remember, it was the base that rejected Mitt because of his switch on pro-life, from pro-choice to pro-life. 
  It was the base that rejected Mitt because it had issues with Mormonism. It was the base that rejected Mitt because 
  they thought he was back and forth and waffling on economic issues. Before we even had a primary vote,  the base had 
  made very clear they had issues with Mitt because if they didnít, he would have defeated McCain in the primaries."
    -- Michael Tom Steele, attacking a probable 2010 GOP front-runner,    Link

  Michael Tom Steele is a one-man quote machine.


  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

 Subject: OMG - Democrats agree with Cheney

Last Sunday former Vice President Cheney said that he would choose Rush Limbaugh over Colin Powell 
when it comes to the future vision of the Republican Party. Bush and Cheney did such a good job of destroying 
the Republican Party that as a Democrat I have encourage Republicans to listen to Cheney. In a party where 
failure is considered to be the new success, I wish Cheney all the success he deserves. 

Marc Perkel
San Bruno, CA.


Founder of the Church of Reality
"Reality changed my life. It can change you life too!"

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

Still the best advertising bargain on the Net

Banner ads by the day,
by the week,
or by the month

Click to get more Hits

 Subject: Torture

 If waterboarding isn't torture, than why do it?
  Wil B

Good point.
Another favorite lie is the "walling" of a victim.

They say they throw the poor bastard against a wall - but not too hard.
And it's not a real wall, it's a padded, fall-away wall that gives when slammed into.

Well then why the fuck bother with it?

  Send e-mail to Bart  | Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog


"Throw the social conservatives the pro-life, pro-family people overboard and the
  Republican party will be as irrelevant as the Whigs.  That will be the end of the party." 
     -- Mike Huckabee, doing his best to make 80 Democratic senators,   Link

 Hey Stupid, nobody suggested you dump the Fascist dog wing of the Republican party.
 They suggested you stop peeing on the semi-normal 2/3 of your party.

 But please, keep saying shit like that.
 We love it when you chase people away.

   Send e-mail to Bart  | Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

Alan Keyes, Stuck in Jail
Some days the good news never stops


Perennial handjob Alan Keyes was arrested during a protest on Notre Dame's campus. He was protesting the 
university's decision to invite Obama to speak at its commencement, and to award him an honorary degree...
But the politician and former presidential candidatet had come to Notre Dame specifically to be arrested, 
something he announced in a letter he'd written and released beforehand...

If that letter Keyes sent...is any indication, he's probably not going to post bond. In it, he announces, 
"I will go to South Bend. I will step foot on the Notre Dame campus to lift up the standard that protects the life 
of the innocent children of this and every generation. I will do it all day and every day from now until the Master 
comes if need be, though it mean I shall be housed every day in the prison house of lies and injustice that Obama, 
Jenkins and their minions now mean to construct for those who will never be still and silent in the face of their 
mockery of God and justice, their celebration of evil."

The letter reads as if Keyes meant it to be received as the successor to the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr's 
"Letter from Birmingham Jail." Ultimately, though, he turns it into something far more reminiscent of Mel Gibson's 
"The Passion of the Christ," full of pain and blood."


"What bothers me about Keyes and his ilk is that while abortion is wrong, for them, war and 
capital punishment are just A-OK.   I'd have a sliver of respect for this man if he'd seen fit to 
protest the unjust war of Iraq or the many state-sanctioned deaths in prisons across this country. "   
     -- Dr. Zachary Smith,,   Link

 Hey, isn't Dr Zachary Smith the old dude in Lost in Space?

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Peruse our Links page

Words Designed to Kill Health Care Reform


I was shocked when I read a memo from Republican pollster Frank Luntz laying out plans to dismantle 
any effort to give all Americans access to quality health care.  Luntz, the handjob who developed language 
designed to promote preemptive war in Iraq and distract from the severity of global warming, is at it again
-- this time with a messaging strategy designed to sink our historic opportunity for health care reform.

Let's be clear: this is not a strategy to push certain ideas about health reform. It is a strategy intended solely 
to kill reform efforts altogether. In his own words, Dr. Luntz has stated, "You're not going to get what you want, 
but you can kill what they're trying to do."

Not surprisingly, since the American public is strongly in favor of fixing the broken health care system, 
the Luntz strategy is predicated on deception.

A Republican using deception to fool the stupid people?

Why haven't we heard something about this before?

One Luntz strategy is to call efforts to reform our broken health care system a "bailout for the insurance industry." 
This is ridiculous. This statement is developed to serve the same interests who stopped at nothing to derail health care 
reform in the 90's, who blocked health care coverage for low-income children, and whose top Medicare priority for 
15 years has been transferring money from seniors and taxpayers to the insurance industry.

I'll tell you how to get past a lying son of a bitch like Luntz and his GOP thugs: You keep it simple - have Obama say, 

"If you're happy with health care and its costs,' then let's do nothing. But if you're 
tired of paying $1500 a month for so-so coverage (that's if you can even get coverage) 
help me fight the Republicans as they try to prevent much-needed health care reform."

My first 2009 hospital visit cost $3,000 for a one-day stay.
My second 2009 hospital visit cost $8,000 for a two-day stay.

We have insurance thru Mrs Bart's work, but the deductible was $2000.

Getting sick is expensive.

 Send e-mail to Bart  | Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

Why Republicans Are Better at Affairs


I've often wondered why Democrats are more often burned at the stake for having affairs than Republicans. 
Maybe because Republicans tend to sleep with their own kind, while Democrats sleep beneath themselves. 
And those women can be counted on to sell their stories.

Not to make a federal case out of this flip observation, but think about Bill Clinton and John Edwards' paramours. 
Like Monica Lewinsky and Gennifer Flowers before her, Rielle Hunter was not a discreet choice. Interns, lounge singers, 
and independent contractors like Rielle, the videographer paid by Edwards to travel with the campaign, are not easily silenced 
once they're dumped. As usually happens, Edwards' wife, Elizabeth, is now gunning for the mistress, while continuing to cohabit 
with her malpracticing husband. But this time, the other woman may hold up the disgraced politician with a ransom baby.

Or, maybe it's about money.
If you have enough of it, you just have an affair with a woman who doesn't have much money.

When you're tired of her, you buy a million dollar home and tell her she can live there free,
with paid utilities and taxes, as long as she keeps her mouth shut.

Trust me, that works.

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

Subject: Prayer


There are two types of prayer.   Vertical prayer, which is a person praying to God.
And horizontal prayer, which is a person trying to impress those around themselves as to how good a Christian they are.

I believe that those who are complaining about the National Day of Prayer subscribe to the latter.

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

John McCain has 7 houses, 13 cars and a private jet
and the GOP wants you to think of him as a "regular guy."

Obama likes Dijon mustard on his hamburger
and that makes him an out-of-touch elitist?

How Dead is the GOP?


Republican ideas - about economic issues, social issues and just about everything else - are not popular ideas. 
They are extremely conservative ideas tarred by association with the extremely unpopular George W. Bush, 
who helped downsize the party to its extremely conservative base. A hard-right agenda of slashing taxes for the 
investor class, protecting marriage from gays, blocking universal health insurance and extolling the glories of 
waterboarding produces terrific ratings for Rush Limbaugh, but it's not a majority agenda.
The party's new, Hooverish focus on austerity on the brink of another depression does not seem to fit the national 
mood, and it's shamelessly hypocritical, given the party's recent history of massive deficit spending on pork, war and 
prescription drugs in good times, not to mention its continuing support for deficit-exploding tax cuts in bad times.
As the party has shrunk to its base, it has catered even more to its base's biases, insisting that the New Deal made 
the Depression worse, carbon emissions are fine for the environment and tax cuts actually boost revenues -- even 
though the vast majority of historians, scientists and economists disagree. The RNC is about to vote on a 
kindergartenish resolution to change the name of its opponent to the Democrat Socialist Party.
This plays well with hard-core culture warriors and tea-party activists convinced that a dictator-President is plotting
to seize their guns, choose their doctors and put ACORN in charge of the Census, but it ultimately produces even 
more shrinkage, which gives the base even more influence -- and the death spiral continues.

The GOP just keeps digging their hole deeper and deeper.

America loves their president and the Fascist dogs love trashing him
and the voters will punish them again as soon as they get the chance.

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Bristol Palinís New Gig


Neil Cole is the head of Iconix, a company that makes the Candieís line of teen fashions. A couple of years ago, 
under fire from critics who accused him of dressing high schoolers like tarts, he established the Candieís Foundation, 
which fights teen pregnancy. And there he was on Wednesday introducing the foundationís new teen ambassador, Bristol Palin.

Palin is not in any way to be confused with the new Candieís brand spokesperson, Britney Spears. 
Bristol is the one endorsing abstinence; Britney is the one promoting "hot bottoms."...

But surely, when it comes to combating teen pregnancy, the Palin family has done enough damage already. 
What worse message could you send to teenage girls than the one they delivered at the Republican convention: 
If your handsome but thuglike boyfriend gets you with child, he will clean up nicely, propose, and show up at an 
important family event wearing a suit and holding your hand. At which point you will get a standing ovation.

Don't forget the part about promising to marry her - until Mom's political campaign is over.

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Forward from Mike Malloy

 Subject: Mike, Thanks for Bartcop

I was driving a while ago and heard you plugging Bartcop and I somehow wrote out the name at a red light. 
Wow!  You nailed it and I am totally addicated to Bartcop, but also can't do without your show every day.  

I have been listening for years, joined up, and now download all of your shows for my r/trip to and from work.  
Keep up the great work, but I wish you were on TV.   I prefer you over Schultz.  

Nancy, everybody prefers Mike to Ed Schultz.

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They'll give us both some extra chips.

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"The idea that we ought to moderate basically means we ought to fundamentally change our philosophy. 
  I for one am not prepared to do that, and I think most of us arenít."  
      -- Super-Dick, on Rethugs softening the rhetoric that's making people flee the GOP,     Link

"I don't want to moderate either. I think our policies, the principles of our party,
  are as viable today as they have been in the past."  
       --John McCain, too stupid to realize he's one of the flip-flopping moderates they're trying to get rid of,     Link

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

 Subject: Palins plummeting polls

The real reason Palin is plummeting is because they have 11 dollar a gallon fuel oil in parts of alaska
and trust me, thats like 2 grand a month for those fixed income folks in Alaska.
That reminds me of the good ol Bush days of five dollar a gallon gas.

The repukes just love big oil companies and theyre willing to rape America dry to enrich Mobil and Exxon.
 Keith in Wellsville Ohio

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Marty's Entertainment Page

Marty always has good stuff.

Click on the E!

Need to take a sudden trip?

 Here's the deal:


"I certainly have every reason to believe that he knew a great deal about the program. 
  He basically authorized it. I mean, this was a presidential level decision. 
  And the decision went to the president. He signed off on it."
    -- Cheney, when asked if Dubya had signed off on torturing the goat herders,     Link

 Butt Dick, and honest man wouldn't answered, "Yes" to that question.

 Why did you have to hem and haw about that "every reason to believe" horseshit?
 And if the biggest dumbass in political history was really the president for eight years, 
 why wouldn't he know everything about it instead of "a great deal?" 

 Could it be because YOU set this up and didn't tell the Top Stooge?

 After all these years you can't lie any better than that?

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

 Subject: Big Pharma / Pot Shrinks Tumors

Hi, Bart,
I read Tab's response to my post. 

Here are my comments:
  The Original Ninjalibrarian

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Subject: Donation

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Mike, thanks for that.

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Kelly Ripa - staying in shape at 38


 Check out hundreds of  Kelly Ripa  pictures  at BC Hotties

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