Thurs-Fri July 16-17, 2009 Vol
2366 - Unboyfriendable
"Joe the Plumber - you can quote me - is a dumbass. He should stick to plumbing." -- Meghan McCain, Link
Today's Tequila Treehouse...
would bring $1.4B
for Sanford Access
on Sex Scandals
TV Hot Tub Scenes
Bilson, Kristen Bell
On the one-year anniversary of Luis Ramirez's
death, the families
of hate crime victims ask you to join their call
On July 14, 2008, Luis Ramirez died after a group
of teenagers hurled racial epithets
and brutally beat him in Shenandoah, PA, ending
with a fatal kick to his head.
The Luis Ramirez family would like to thank you
for your support and actions you've taken
to seek justice for this loving father, son,
partner, friend, and hard-worker.
His family continues to deeply suffer their loss.
"Barack Obama is very unpopular. He got 34
percent of the vote statewide, and less in our district. If he were
to run for re-election today, I bet it would be even worse."
-- Rep. Dan Boren, an Okie conservative Democrat, Link
Poor Dan, he grew up funny.
dad always hid his homosexuality and it warped his kids.
Excerpt: Much of the progressive blogosphere is aghast
at the embarrassing Republican strategy of putting Senator Jeff Sessions,
a man with a history of racially insensitive
statements, as the central interlocutor of a Hispanic woman. Could they
really be that stupid - again?...
Just as torture was not about getting information
but about intimidating our foes and exacting false confessions to justify
an Iraq-al Qaida link, just as attacking ACORN
was not about investigating voter fraud but about intimidating people
from going to the polls, and just as questioning
science was not about embracing Creationism but about discrediting c
limate change so polluting corporations could
continue their global plunder, Sessions going after Sotomayer’s non-existent
“bias” is not about vetting a potential Supreme
Court justice. It’s about making you afraid. It’s about making the media
And it’s about making the Obama government afraid.
The point of putting a "racially insensitive"
white man up to question a Latina has nothing to do with bad GOP planning
and everything to do with intimidation. Republicans
know she’s getting confirmed; what they really want to do is intimidate
the White House, the media, and me and you from
embracing progressive views.
"We’re having trouble getting people into the
military. And I think that we shouldn’t turn down anybody that’s willing to fight for
our country, certainly based on sexual orientation."
-- Harry Reid (D-Quitter) Link
Protecting Ametrica and getting Intel is so important,
we torture the unlucky sons of bitches who MIGHT have some information.
But it's not important enough to have a gay translator?
I've been saying for years we should give Israel
a 20 or so mile wide swath of land following
the U.S. Mexico border, we can even haul in truckloads
of their "Holy" sand and even haul over
the Wailing Wall for less than we give them every
year in support/defence money.
They would in return watch our southern
border, employ Mexicans seeking
better wages and solve the whole stupid middle
east peace problem....
Excerpt: Pity the poor "real Americans," because they
sure feel sorry for themselves.
Self-pity appears to be the latest national craze.
Not that we haven't got real troubles, but everywhere you look
and listen these days, some big crybaby's blubbering
about how people like him o"r her get no respect from
(take your pick) "Ivy League elitists," the "scientific
establishment," "so-called sophisticates," the "mainstream media" and so
But hey, Americans don't come any realer than
me. I learned that recently from MSNBC's Mika Brzezinski.
Discussing Palin's supporters on "The Morning
Joe," Brzezinski allowed that us country folks - I live in a
rural county with a lot more cows than people
- constitute the nation's moral backbone.
"God, I hate to say it," Brzezinski commented,
"but in the cities where there are a little bit more
liberal elite populations, you are not going
to find what is representative of America."
Sigh. We already tried that. It brought us George
W. Bush, a synthetic cowboy who dropped the rancher pose
the minute he left the White House. Back in 2001,
metropolitan pundits, seemingly unfamiliar with the oeuvre
of Hank Williams and Garth Brooks, kept telling
us about the superior moral instincts of us "redstate" voters.
"Can you imagine the consequences? We’ll
have no military. Because anytime any Soldier, any Sailor, any Airman does not want
to follow any orders, all he has to do is call an attorney and say 'I don’t want to follow this order because
I question the legitimacy of the commander in chief.'"
-- the lawyer for Maj. Stefan Frederick Cook (R-Racist), Link
I don't get it.
This lawyer won the case for his client,
and now he's calling his victory a disaster?
That happy horseshit from Dennis Miller about
"smiling Iraqi kids" really pissed me off.
Hey, Dennis, would you trade your kids' lives
for an Iraqi?
When they turn 18 are you gonna tell them,
"Enlist right now or you're dead to me"?
No? Then stop being so Koresh damn generous with
other peoples' lives.
Dave in Deer Park, NY
Christ I remember how Miller used to be merciless
on people like Dan Quayle and now look at him.
My only guess is that he had some lurking prejudices
and that September 11th unleashed the squirrels in his brain.
I would almost feel sorry for him if he wasn’t
such an ass.
Keep up the good work.
Michael in Burbank, CA.
Before he turned Nazi scum, Dennis Miller was
Poor bastard - he threw it all away to kiss the
ass of the Worst President Ever.
- just call the BartPhone at 1-800-530-2979
leave your 2 minute message or question or joke or impression to be played
on BCR. If you screw it up, just say it again and I'll edit the bad part
are welcome to call!
language decent so I can
play it in BCR!
Excerpt: A bill to tax and regulate marijuana in California
like alcohol would generate nearly $1.4 billion in revenue,
according to tax officials. The State
Board of Equalization report estimates marijuana retail sales would
bring $990 million from a $50-per-ounce fee and
$392 million in sales taxes.
The bill introduced by San Francisco Democratic
Assemblyman Tom Ammiano in February
would allow adults 21 and older to legally possess,
grow and sell marijuana.
Ammiano has promoted the bill as a way to help
bridge the state's $26.3 billion budget shortfall.
"It defies reason to propose closing parks and
eliminating vital services for the poor while this
potential revenue is available," Ammiano said
in a statement.
Thanks for that link. The article is stunning
I couldn't put it down, and I'm sending it out
to everyone I know who I think will read it.
I would say uneffingbelievable except it's all
too believable; I just didn't know how big
and how many people have starved to death so
Big Bob Rubin and his buddies could have their yachts.
Downside to belonging to the church of reality--there's
no hell for these SOBs to rot in.
I didn't read that article because I think Matt
Tiabbi is one of the worst people in America.
He's Maureen Dowd and Andrew Sullivan - but worse.
I refuse to trust him even one percent.
He's worse than me when I'm kidding.
He's the biggest liar on our team.
Recall the last months of the McCain candidacy,
where it was out of gas and had four flat tires.
Neocons didn't like him; the Religious faction
didn't like him. Women and minorities didn't like him either.
So the religious power-brokers saw an opportunity.
Since "God speaks to his preachers" their followers vote as they are ordered.
In exchange for selecting the Vice-President
nominee, the Glory Hallelujah contingent would tell their sheep that God
McCain to be President. They chose Palin
1) she's allegedly female, to attract the lost
2) her religious credentials are certifiably
bat-shit insane, and she is completely under their control;
3) appearance-wise, she makes the redneck males
4) she is young enough to be around for decades.
If (as they hoped) McCain "tipped over" in the
next few years, they would have a complient
shoe-in candidate under their complete control
to institute a Christian Reconstructionist Theocracy.
McCain, watching his spluttering campaign grind
to a halt, grudgingly made the deal, in spite of not having vetted her
or even knowing anything about her. He
detested those people, but it was the only way he could reach his ultimate
Gritting his teeth, he lied to the Republican
Convention and told the crowd that Palin was the "most qualified candidate".
For a few short days, it looked like she was
the miracle that would allow the Repigs to win the election.
Then she opened her mouth. Thre rest is
Excerpt: National media blitzed Gov. Mark Sanford’s staff,
offering big ratings and, possibly, a sympathetic venue
in an effort to land the first interview with
the governor after his six-day trip to Argentina.
In addition, a blogger and state leaders reached
out to Sanford’s office to try to coordinate a way
to “push back” on the growing mystery surrounding
The behind-the-scenes maneuvering is detailed
in e-mails released by the governor’s office
this week in response to The State’s request
under the freedom of information act.
The e-mails show some outlets promised Sanford
“friendly ground,” while others objected
to early reports that questioned his disappearance.
“If you all want to speak on this publicly, you’re
welcome to Washington Times Radio,” wrote staffer
Joseph Deoudes to a Sanford spokesman on June
23. "You know that you will be on friendly ground here!'
They're following in Tim the Whore's footprints.
"I'll help you lie if you give me the exclusive."
It's going to be 100+ degrees again in Oklahoma today.
I wonder how hot it is in Hell?
"Sanford remains committed to repairing the
damage he's done to his marriage... Spending personal time with his wife
is a part of that process."
-- Sanford's spokesliar, Link
Sanford, sick and tired of the woman who made him governor, left
her to be with his "soulmate" in Argentina.
Now he's stuck with her at some retreat, wishing he was still
with his South American firecracker.
Does Mrs. Bart like flowers? The garden
Yeah, Oklahoma is boiling now so it'll be great
tp get away.
Other readers have recommended that place but
we don't do the Bed & Breakfast thing.
I hate all that "I'm
from Oklahoma - where are you from?" crap.
Excerpt: I think he looks very good next to all the other
cheating politicians we've seen in recent years...
We're so accustomed to Bill Clinton with Monica
Lewinsky, John Edwards and Eliot Spitzer.
You know, all these politicians, Ensign as you
mentioned, and it's always just sleazy.
They're just having sex with the easiest roadkill
they can find. It's just, you know,
'Oh my god, the door just closed, my wife's in
the other room, come over here and touch me.'
It's this very sleazy quick kind of sex, and
this guy Sanford, you know, I tell you, he could win
women back if he just went to this mistress because
obviously that's who he loves. I mean,
that's the third act of the movie.
We laughed ourselves silly at your HILARIOUS
Jesse the Pit Bull seems to have missed the point
so I’ll spell it out:
The problem is not Dr. Laura’s looks, it is her
That “little hottie” is now a right-wing scold
who makes her living pontificating about morality.
What a phony!
I’ve never read her self-help books and
don’t plan to, but I wonder,
does The Care and Feeding of a Husband
donning a dog collar for his viewing pleasure?
I haven't read this book, but from the reviews,
it'll read like I wrote it.
"We've moved into an era in which stupidity
is celebrated if it made people money. That is 'glorifying ignorance.' The reflexive
instincts of the Gut are celebrated at the expense of reasoned, informed opinion."
Handjobs like Bush and Palin are VERY proud of their ignorance.
They mock "the elites" which is anyone smarter than them
Subject: racist soldier Maj.
Stefan Frederick Cook
I love how this coward is worried about “committing
if he followed orders from a President born in
Hawaii. Come on, man!!
This chicken-shit probably wouldn’t have worried
about hooking electrodes to an Afghani’s balls
if a white, Republican half-wit was giving orders.
We’ve been committing war crimes since March 2003,
but now that a black man is giving orders, we’ve
got a bunch of conscientious objectors.
I wish Barry O would court-martial his sorry ass,
but I’ve heard his deployment’s already been rescinded.
I’d be curious to know how your readers in or
who have served in the military feel about this.
Thanks again, Bart.
I'm certain it boils down to pure racism.
Obama doesn't have any swagger and he hasn't been on the job
long enough for people to hate him
so if they do, it's gotta be the color of his skin and that's bed news
for his detractors.
So, now with Chip Pickering (Racist-Mississippi)
being shown up as another Family Values Republican
and that the fact that he, along with Sanford,
Coburn et al, has ties to this C Street Christian bachelors' pad,
C Street must stand for Cock Street. There
must be some weird, wild, freaky-ass shit that goes on at that place.
To paraphrase the following as if I worked at
Fox News, " a Christian Bible study...some... members of Congress hard...
And I've been working them...in the back of the
room. I would consider him a...giant." Larry Craig must
oops strike that, be a frequent visitor
QUESTION: Did your wife and your family
know about the affair before the trip to Argentina?
SANFORD: Yes. We've been working through
this thing for about the last five months. I've been to a lot
of different—as part of what we called "C Street"
when I was in Washington. It was, believe it or not,
a Christian Bible study—some folks that asked
members of Congress hard questions that I think were
very, very important. And I've been working with
them. I see Cubby Culbertson in the back of the room.
I would consider him a spiritual giant. . . .
Excerpt: The American Conservative Union asked FedEx for
a check for $2 million to $3 million in return for the group’s
endorsement in a bitter legislative dispute,
then the group’s president flipped and sided with UPS after FedEx refused
For the $2 million plus, ACU offered a range of
services that included: “Producing op-eds and articles
written by ACU’s Chairman David Keene and/or
other members of the ACU’s board of directors.
The conservative group’s remarkable demand — black-and-white
proof of the longtime Washington practice
known as “pay for play” — was contained in a
private letter to FedEx , which was provided to POLITICO.
The letter exposes the practice by some political
interest groups of taking stands not for reasons of pure principle,
as their members and supporters might assume,
but also in part because a sponsor is paying big money.
You mean some people in Washington sell themselves for money?
Why didn't anybody point that out before now?
The thing that scares me the most about the resignation
of Sarah Palin is - when Putin rears his head
and comes into the airspace of the United States,
who is going to be keeping an eye on the Russians?
How will America survive without Sarah Palin
watching the border preventing the Russians from invading?
Excerpt: Hot tubs are the required accessory for almost
any reality show, and The Real World
has built an entire empire on hot tub hook-ups.
But even scripted TV knows that spas
are the perfect excuse to get down and almost
They listed ten hot hot tub scenes but they missed the big one.
Years ago on Fastlane, which I thought was a younger/hipper
Tiffany Thiessen and playmate Jaime Pressly went after it in
a hot tub.
Excerpt: Kristen Bell linked up with Rachel Bilson yesterday
(I'd pay to see that!) at Vogue's anniversary
for genius designer Phillip Lim, making my heart
beat faster than that time I saw a picnic basket full of puggles.
Is it my runaway imagination or is Kristen Bell often photographed
in the arms of another woman?
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