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BCR #158 is hereHOTHOT
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 Monday  October 12,  2009 Vol 2409 - Fear the Tusk 

by Bruce Yurgil

Quote of the Day

"If the President has a BLT tomorrow, 
  the Republicans would try to ban bacon."
      -- Alan Grayson,   Link


In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Arrow Oklahoma Abortion Law HOT
Arrow Newt: Porn Fan of the Year 
Arrow Racist GA Restaurant Sign HOT
Arrow Nancy Grace's new TV Show
Arrow Hell for Roman Polanski 
Arrow Wanda retakes the Crown HOT
Arrow Are umpires blind or crooked? 
Arrow Megan Fox's Bisexual Seal 



Help Bartcop.com survive!

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"Obama says he will end Don't Ask Don't Tell but he has done nothing, and he offered no time-line, 
  no deadline for action and no verifiable record that he has done anything, despite his claims that he has. 
  That's a test of real sincerity on this matter. He failed it."
    -- Andrew Sullivan,   Link

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Oklahoma Abortion Law
 Personal Details To Be Posted Online


A new Oklahoma law requires physicians to disclose detailed information on women's abortions to the State's 
Department Of Health, which will then post the collected data on a public website. The controversial measure 
comes into effect on November 1 and will cost $281,285 to implement, $256,285 each subsequent year to maintain.

Oklahoma women undergoing legal abortion procedures will be forced to reveal:

1) Date of abortion
2) County in which abortion is performed
3) Age of mother
4) Marital status of mother
5) Race of mother
6) Years of education of mother
7) State or foreign country of residence of mother
8) Total number of previous pregnancies of the mother.

 Obviously they want women to go to other states for their abortions.
 And if they can't afford it?  Fuck 'em.
 They can always get a back alley abortion with a coathanger.

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"I was on a plane yesterday and I heard someone complain that their child's acne was because 
  of George Bush. Of course last week the Olympics didn't come to Chicago, that was my brother's fault. 
  And at some point people are going to have to put on their big-boy pants and assume responsibility 
  for the great challenges and opportunities our country has..." 
    --  Jeb Bush, asked if his brother ruined the world's economy,   Link

 Poor Jeb - he wanted to be president in the worst way
 but his brother fucked everything up for the Bush family and Republicans.
 Bush did such a bad job, the country elected an unqualified Muslim Socialist with Stalinist tendencies.

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Gingrich named "Porn Fan of the Year"



Allison Vivas once thought she’d be spending Wednesday night in D.C. with Newt Gingrich. Then he stood her up.

Vivas was contacted by Gingrich’s PAC, and was told Newt wanted to honor her as the group’s "Entrepreneur of the Year" for 2009.

Gingrich associate Joe Gaylord wrote to Vivas that "Newt’s Business Defense and Advisory Council" wanted to "dine privately" 
with her on  Oct. 7 at the "historic Capitol Hill Club" in "recognition of the risks you take to create jobs and stimulate the economy."

But then Gingrich found out about Vivas' entreporneurial background: She creates adult movies.

And given Gingrich’s presidential aspirations, he got clammy about spending quality time alone with the auteur behind such titles as 
Anal Devastation, 
Couples Seduce Teens, 
Brazen And Unshaven, 
Double Penetration Tryouts, 
Wife Switch Volume 7, 
Desperately Seeking Cock, 
Monster Cock Junkies, 
House Wife Bangers, 
Memoirs Of A Gusher, 
Teen Anal Pounding, etc.

 ha ha

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Racist Restaurant Sign
 How racist are they in Georgia?



When you walk into the Georgia Peach Oyster Bar, you feel like you've walked into a different era. 
Behind the pool tables stands a mannequin in a Klu Klux Klan costume, but it's what's outside Patrick Lanzo's 
restaurant that has some people angry.

Lanzo put up a sign that reads "Obama's plan for health-care: Nigger rig it." 
Asked why he put up the sign, Lanzo said, "I've been putting up signs for 22 years 
and I've put up all kinds of political signs," said Lanzo.

"Why did you use the N word?" Marsh asked.

"'Well, I’ve used it most of my life. (He voted for McCain.) There are different ways  
to put your opinion up, but that's just the words I choose,' Lanzo answered.

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Marty's Entertainment Page

Marty always has good stuff.

Click on the E!

See more at  whatnowtoons.com


"I think the people who used to run the election board for Saddam
   were hired by the Nobel committee here to tally the votes." 
    -- the vulgar racist Pigboy, upset that his warmongering idol couldn't win anything,  

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Subject: Catholic rape

Bart, that Roman Polanski comic was great, but what would be even funnier
is a cartoon where Polanski requests sanctuary from Der Pope.

After all, the legal age of consent in Vatican City is 12.

Swear to Koresh. Look it up.


I believe we have SIX Catholics on the Supreme Court now.

Maybe they'll make rape retroactively legal to help those horny priests.

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Saw it at http://cantstopwontstop.com

Subject: Winning by losing - losing by winning?

President Obama won the Nobel Peace Prize and Republicans are angry.
Last week America lost it's bid to get the 2016 Olympics and the Republicans were cheering.

Since Republicans have been doing everything wrong and caused our current
economic crisis and started the two wars we are currently stuck with they are
trying to redefine losing as winning and winning as losing.

It seems that the angrier the Republicans are
the more you know America is heading in the right direction.
Congratulations Mr. President!

Marc Perkel
My blog: http://marc.perkel.com
Founder of the Church of Reality
"Reality Based Voter"

Side note: Enjoy my new squirrel video.

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Affordable, personalized website design and hosting.
Get free hosting for one year with any design purchase.


Subject: why we need universal health insurance

 Frank in China

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"When I was sworn into the Marine Corps, I was sworn to uphold the Constitution against every enemy, 
  foreign and domestic. We've got a lot of domestic enemies of the Constitution and one of them is Nancy Pelosi." 
    -- Georgia Rep Paul Broun (R-Birther Handjob)    Link

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"The AMA does not have the credibility on this healthcare issue, as they would like to project."
    -- Michae; Tom Steele, pretending he knows more about health care than the doctors at the AMA,    Link


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Subject: Eddie and Rickie


I’m a big fan of Eddie Izzard, but I think that Rickie Gervais is the smartest and funniest person I’ve ever seen.  
If you’re a Netflix guy, check out Extras.  Also check him out on Inside the Actors’ Studio.

Seriously bro… Rickie is fab.

Subject: You have totally offended me Bart -for the first time.

You don't get British humour?!  Bart, I am cut to the bone!  Eddie Izzard is quite funny but he's not the only one.  
Little Britain is a bit over the top for me in some skits, but I dare you to watch "Bubble Devere" at the fat farm 
on their and not laugh.  (UK version of their show is much better than the one that tries cater to the US)

If I can't convince you, then you should watch Top Gear which is a car show that one of your other readers 
linked to on today's page.  I saw that episode that the timesonline link talked about, and it was one of their best shows. 
Those guys are hilarious every week and have entirely too much fun (other than almost being killed in Alabama) 
to be paid for what they do.  

Come on Bart give the brits a chance.

I keep seeing Benny Hill in a dress and Brits falling down laughing.

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Mike Malloy Live

Nancy Grace's new TV Show


CBS Television Distribution (CTD) hopes that Nancy Grace will become the next Judge Judy. 
The syndicator has signed an exclusive development deal with Grace to develop a 30-minute daily strip 
that will be a new take on the court show. CBS executives are excited about Grace as a personality.

CTD is developing the show, for now titled Swift Justice With Nancy Grace, for fall 2010. 
Grace has no plans to leave her show on HLN.

CTD first started talking to Grace last year. A quick study of Grace's popularity convinced 
CTD that it might be a good idea to go into business with the former attorney...

Grace is lucky that Scott Peterson murdered his wife (probably.)
If not for that great break, she'd just be another schlub guesting on Larry King.

       "Dat's right..."

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Subject: Glenn Beck - rapist

Bart, I know you are a man of logic.
I know you demand evidence when someone is accused of a crime.

Do you realize there is no evidence that Glenn Beck is innocent of rape and murder?
Worse, there is no evidence that Glenn Beck is not a serial rapist and murderer.
 Eddie the Hunter

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Check out the Bart Store

No Peace For Obama Or America
  by my good friend Richard Fricker


Watching the conservative and Republican reaction to President Obama’s Nobel Peace Prize certainly tells us more 
about them than about the prize. It should be remembered these are the same people who cheered when Chicago lost 
its Olympic bid, because it was a loss for Obama.

These people have shown they care not one whit for America or American values. They have instead shown 
they place their agenda, a one-party near totalitarian society above the best interest of the United States.

Did they think some half-drunk clown who killed hundreds of thousands 
in a fabricated war was going to get such an honor?

 ha ha

No, these elements which shame the name of Democracy would, and do, demean any vestige of civility and 
common decency by attacking anyone who accomplishes anything for the public good.

   Send e-mail to Bart  | Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

Subject: Polanski & Rape

I'm disappointed in you. Polanski is a child rapist.

I had nothing to do with that.

He plied the child with drugs and alcohol and (lots of details). She was a child.

Who is arguing with you?

This man is a paedophile, the lowest of the low. He fled from justice and now
justice seeks him to make him accountable for his despicable crime.

Mary, thanks for your opinion, but we need to talk about the same subject.

If I slap your brother in the face and he falls, they'd call that "The Bartcop beating."
If the vulgar Pigboy drags a black man behind his pickup, that's also "a beating."

Can you see a difference in those two situations?
I'll bet you can.

Put another way, Rhode Island and Texas are both states,
but only a crazy person would argue they are the same.

   Send e-mail to Bart  | Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

    If the light stays on for more than 4 hours, 
    call your erectrician.

What is this?

Does poker player Phil Ivey
(the Tiger Woods of Golf,)
read  bartcop.com?

 I really like the poker/stock market aspect.

You can't make any progress without gambling.
Why not learn how to gamble in your youth?

Hell for Roman Polanski
  by Gene Lyons


What would Americans talk about without celebrity sex scandals? It's getting to where even a diligent voyeur 
has trouble keeping the protagonists straight without schematic diagrams like the character lists in 19th-century Russian novels.

If adultery were a crime, a cynical homicide detective once told me, the prisons would be bigger than the graveyards. 
Even so, reveling in other people's sins has become the national pastime. We've become a country of Peeping Toms, a sadistic activity.

Recently, four separate sex scandals vied for the news consumer's attention: a film director, two prominent politicians 
and a TV comic. As usual, the unlucky lovers saw their privacy obliterated and their intimate lives rendered into moralistic fables. 
Whom the gods would destroy, they first make famous.

Everybody's least favorite character is Roman Polanski. Except for a few Hollywood fools and European intellectuals 
who express the perverse belief that art excuses all crimes, hardly anybody would be upset to see Polanski go to prison. 
As one who thinks his film "Chinatown" a masterpiece, I don't much care what happens to him.

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Subject: H.N.I.C.

There aren't any races anymore, there are the wealthy, and everybody else.
It doesn't matter what color your skin is, we're all niggers today.

We might all be niggers because we're disrespected by rich, white Republicans,
but the situation should not exist since we niggers are in the majority

Who else but our dumbass Democrats could get out-voted when they have the MAJORITY?!?!

The sad truth is ...

the Democrats could benefit from the advice of an Okie with an IQ of 64.
I'm not claiming I'd have all the answers, but I'll bet I'd have three.

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"When I saw the mock-up of what it was going to look like, it literally gave me chills. 
  I felt like we were right back in those wonderful days when Tim was still with us."  
      -- NBC News President Steve Capus, on the Newseum exhibit of Saint Timmy's office

"Not to speak ill of the dead, but really, Newseum? Is it necessary to further enshrine the late 
  and already vigorously celebrated Tim Russert by re-creating his NBC office as an exhibit?" 

"South Buffalo, where I spend a lot of time - insular, provincial and proud of it, racist, racist, racist.  
  You can’t go into a bar in South Buffalo and not hear the 'N' word within ten minutes. Russert was a 
  right-wing tool, and his "tough" questions were softballs of slightly higher velocity." 

"I lost all respect for him when he defended the pedophile priests."  

"Tim Russert wore a George W. Bush pin under his lapel during the debate he moderated between 
  Bush and Gore, which he flashed to Bush when initially greeting the candidates (before cameras were rolling). 
  I’ll gladly speak ill of the dead, when they did as much damage to the nation I love as has Tim Russert.  
  Russert was not a journalist, and lacked the basic ethics of the profession he pretended to be a part of."  
       -- thetruth,

"The cult of Tim Russert is beyond silly.  What is the rationale for it?  When it came to war and peace, 
  his questions tended to have a jingoistic quality.  I guess this must be where his reputation for supposedly
  being tough came from."

"What a craven cad he was…how he licked Jack Welch’s boots each and every day, carrying water 
  for GWB every Sunday… leading to the election and service of the worst president of this or any age..."  

 Russert's "journalistic integrity" can be summed up in two words:


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Subject: Rush to purchase the Rams

It would be nice to hear the NFL commissioner stand up and say to Rush:

"Sorry, but we don't do business with 'your kind' "

I don't know if the commissioner has the authority to block a sale to Rush, but if it happened, 
doesn't he have the ability to set the schedule? We could have a season where NOBODY plays the Rams.....

....except the Cowboys
    --dave, in Ashland OR

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Saw it on ChuckMcCoy.com

Are umpires blind or crooked?

  How blind can a professional umpire be?
   He ruled that ball was outside the line.


In the 11th inning of Game 2, Minnesota's Joe Mauer sliced a ball down the left-field line
that bounced at least 6 inches inside fair territory for what should’ve been a ground-rule double.
Umpire Phil Cuzzi, blind as a bat and standing 10 feet away, called it foul.

So that’s what baseball has come to: supporting egregious flubs to protect their own.
It’s the epitome of an old-boys’ network, and it’s insulting to the game.

Nobody inside baseball wants a postseason defined by its umpiring screw-ups,
and yet year after year, they happen. Ignoring the issue won’t make it go away.
Baseball has been hijacked by bad refereeing.

Not only that, but TNT had a virtual strike zone on the screen that showed the home plate umpire
calling strikes on pitches that were more than a ball-width out of the strike zone.

We ask the batter to make a decision about a ball that's coming towards him,
so why can't an umpire make a better decision about the ball after it's been caught?

Baseball is full of prejudice and arbitrary rules that change from pitch to pitch.
Tens or hundreds of millions of dollars are at stake - so why can't they get it right?

I think it's a lot like health care: The people in charge make so many millions of dollars,
why would they want to change things and make it fair?

After the game the head umpire said the blind fool "felt real bad," but who gives a fuck?
Instant replay would fix this, but the good-old-boys don't want the game to be played fair.
They want the sainted Yankess to win ever year and that's killing what's left of baseball.

It's hard enough for a team to play against Steinbrenner's wallet.

When Reggie Jackson beat the Yankees, Steinbrenner bought him.
When Roger Clemens beat the Yankees, Steinbrenner bought him.
When Johnny Damon beat the Yankees, Steinbrenner bought him.

Baseball is turning into professional wrestling.

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U2 - Biggest gamblers ever?


"At the first show in Barcelona (June 30), we realized, wow, it's working incredibly well," guitarist Edge, 48, said 
"On a good night, the production, the songs, the audience, the videos, the architecture become this amazing event. Often in these 
 big stadiums, you feel, 'Why am I here? I could be home listening to the CD.' This show makes sense of playing stadiums."

It may only make sense for U2, a band with the fan base, budget and musical might to pull it off.

The tour's in-the-round configuration boosts capacity by roughly 20%, enabling the band to break attendance records in every venue. 
U2 packed 84,472 into Giants Stadium, the venue's largest crowd ever, eclipsing the 82,948 drawn to Pope John Paul II in 1995.

Each of the three "claw" structures that leapfrog along the itinerary requires 37 trucks and cost upward of $40 million. 
The trek entails a total fleet of 200 trucks, a crew of 400 and a daily overhead of $750,000.

That's betting $21 million dollars every month.

We're going to see the U2 show this week.
I hope it's not 35 degrees and raining.

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Wanda retakes the Crown

Maybe the last 3-4 years, I've said Kathy Griffin is the funniest woman in America.
I love her, she has balls of steel and she has the balls to let the camera film her crying.

More honest than Howard Stern?

  Oh, I have an opinion about that!

Kathy rules, but Wanda's HBO special was up there in the stratosphere.
If you don't know, Wanda wrote for Chris Rock for years and years.
For all we know, Wanda was Rock's writer/teacher in the nineties when he buss open.

But her performance Saturday nite was right up there with the greats.
She did sex, she did race, she did health care, she did gay rights...
It was part Richard Pryor, part Chris Rock, ...maybe some Earfquake?

Is there anything more fun than a stand-up comic who's just killing you?
Back before he turned Bush bastard, Dennis Miller was talking about the first time he ever
saw Sam Kinison live in a club in LA and he said he asked his comedy friends at the table
(Belzer? Robin Williams, somebody big) "Have you ever laughed that hard in your life?"

Catch this Wanda Sykes special on HBO all this week.

It'll take time and further viewings to know how good it was,
but I'ma say it, it's gotta be in the Top Ten Standups Ever.

Look for slices of that in the soon-to-be-released BCR 159.

Kathy, I still think you own the world.
But now it's up to you to get your funniest woman in America crown back.

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Ever done any Cat Bowling?

Subject: John Lennon

Just wanted to mention that today is John Lennon's birthday.  
To those of us of a certain vintage he is still a hero and martyr. 
 Kerry M..  NW Indiana 

I say it every four years.
Can you imagine (no pun) the chill when John Lennon takes the stage at the Democratic convention?

Followed by Martin Luther King, Bobby, then Jack?

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Cowboys beat winless Chiefs in overtime

"Well we're 2-2, so we're not the prettiest bride in the church right now either
  We just got to go play. We have to play hard. In this league, anybody can beat you. 
  We found that out last year in St. Louis."
       -- Cowboys defensive end Marcus Spears,   Link

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Megan Fox's Bisexual Seal of Approval


 See 100 more  Megan Fox  pictures  at  BC Hotties

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