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Eldrick is finished
He'll never win another major


Tiger Woods didn't win the PGA Championship yesterday, or any major this year.
Get used to that sort of thing happening, because Tiger Woods will never win another major championship again.

He's finished. He's not catching Jack Nicklaus. He's won what, fourteen majors? Well, that's what he'll stay on
for the rest of eternity. It's a shame, because he has put his entire being into chasing Nicklaus, and we, as fans,
have followed him for over a decade assuming that the record would eventually be in his grasp, and sooner rather
than later. It's frustrating to get to this point and think that we'll never reach that moment with Woods.

But we never will. There are a few reasons why.

1. What's the point?

Tiger Woods has been raised his entire life to break Nicklaus's record. It was a goal established by his old man
and seconded by Nicklaus himself. Tiger was going to smash the record, and then children of all colors were
going to join hands in song and a giant rainbow would ring the Earth for the next eight millennia. That was the plan.

Tiger's life was about breaking that record. More important, his life was about the moment he broke the record.
The wild cheers from the crowd. The breathless platitudes from the golf media. The hug from his wife and kids
after coming off the course. (And the inevitable four-way in Vegas the weekend after.)    ha ha

That moment will never happen now.

Damn, when that Bartcop Hex falls, it falls like a wet safe.

Poor Eldrick - maybe he can get a job as a greeter at a casino?

Or maybe he could screen calls for the vulgar Pigboy?

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