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Buzzcook's Idol Gives Back Review

Well I made a big mistake last night. Usually I find a set list on the net before the show starts, 
then type along with each performance during the show and commercials. For Idol Gives Back
I thought Iíd just find a set list and fill it out from memory.

Well imagine my surprise that there isnít a set list for the big give back show. So I read a bunch of reviews 
that mentioned a couple people but not others or mentioned what some people sang but skipped others. 
I also learned just how much some TV writers are willing to suck up to Ryan Seacreast. 

Oh and Momma Sox isnít mad at Ryan and she didnít almost quit and and and I never want to know
this much about the Idol kids again in my life ever.  ha ha

The show started with the 12 finalists all singing the melody of some white bread song. That is one of the things
I hate about night two of Idol the kids doing a hyper simple version of a song and doing hyper simple choreography 
and sounding like hyper simpletons. Hell just stand them up on choir bleachers and give them robes and choir books,
itíd be more exciting. Geez on Stones night 2 they could have done ďCanít Always Get What You WantĒ.
So it was nice to see that the 5 missing kids hadnít done injury to themselves in the mean time. 
Given that weíve had to put up with the Disney boy wannabes and the degradation of boring Mike, 
quirky girl and rocker boy, makes me miss a couple of them.

Well there was a queen and a spice girl and a real skinny girl. 
Then the Black Eyed Peas did a lousy version of a song in which I swear a guy sang an entire verse flat as a pancake. 
Geez guys itís a classic, if you canít make it your own then donít mess with it.

Ryan goes to Africa and even his glib and unctuous manner canít lessen the impact of people living in poverty with real needs. 
While Idol is stupid fluff, anything that gives comfort to the afflicted is praiseworthy.

George Lopez is the least funny comic we will see tonight. 
He does a high school level skit that is notable only in how much he sucks up to Ellen.

I agree - I like George OK, he just wasn't funny that night.
And why give him so much time on such a big night?  
I could understand if his show was on FOX...

Jeff Beck is a great guitarist. Joss Stone is a pretty girl with a pretty voice. I may make fun of Bette Midler 
but she knows how to shred a song. Midlerís version of ďI Put a Spell on YouĒ, from a Disney movie, 
was miles better than what we heard last night. I just hope Beck is getting some.

Morgan Freeman shows up and Randy gets to ride along as we see that red states have real problems.

Alicia Keyes is a pretty girl with a pretty voice and lots of talent. For some reason Iím reminded of show tunes
and the great American songbook when I hear her. We would have been better off if they had just given the whole show to her.

Ok there are two lame comedians (tall skinny Brit guy and a short fat American guy. (Laurel and Hardy should sue) 
that pop up every once in a while doing a lame phone bank skit. Was that really octo-mom?   Yes, that was really her - and Slash.
Jim Carrey puts a predictable end to it several hours after it had died.

Carrie Underwood is another pretty girl with a pretty face and lots of talent. She does a promo of her new album that sounds 
pretty darn good for a pop/country song. Give half of the show to her and half to Alicia and weíd have an interesting show.

Ellen gives David Arquette some screen time and notices that there are poor people in America.

David Cook, a pretty boy with a pretty voice from a couple of Idols ago, shows up in Africa and shows what being a 
pretty boy rocker is all about. Maybe if we stuck Casey in a hut in Africa heíd sing it with some feeling.   ha ha
At any rate Cook gives us an idea of what Idol would look like if Crystal had some competition.

Annie Lennox sings while wearing a shirt that says HIV Positive. 
She just does it to advertise the 22 million folks in Africa with the disease. Iím glad Annie doesnít have HIV. 
I also think we should give half the show to Annie, half to Carrie, and half to Alicia. Hey they went overtime - it would work. 
Oh and I still see the pretty girl with the amazing voice and lots of talent.

Mary K Blige and Randy team up to do some seventies boy band song. It doesnít suck.

Simon goes to America and has the good manners to not mention that if America had universal health care 
as Britain does, his Arizona segment wouldnít be necessary.

Elton John does his lounge act. Iím trying to remember if Elton ever really rocked. Help me here cause I got nothing.

About 40 years ago Elton did Crocodile Rock.
I think that was his last non-funeral dirge.

OK the big moment is upon us. I think this is Caseyís first time in the bottom three. Aaron and his soul twin Tim are with him. 
Iím expecting to see Aaron go. Then to my amazement Jesus wept and god gives up on Tim.
I kinda feel sorry for Jezuz, but he gave it a good try and itís not like he can do miracles.

BTW give to the charity of your choice. 
May I recommend Seattle Childrenís Orthopedic Hospital, if you donít already have a preference?
 Buzzcook
 

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