Survivor Ageism week 4
Episode 3: The Producers have to step in to
save this awful season.
Recap by Mike The Dealer
We go to Team Geezer’s camp to see Jimmy T. make a fool of himself as
they all sit around
and shiver in the horrible cold rain. This is a segment that’s not even
but maybe in fact five or sixshadowing with how ham fisted and heavy
handed the producers
are in assuring us of Jimmy T’s impending doom, Marty does a quick
promo to drive that point
further home that Jimmy T. really does piss him off and well, he might
have to go.
We come back from commercial with Dan telling us that the water they
fish in has been flooded
with mud due to a storm, and they pretty much have nothing to eat and
are starving to death.
Jill does a promo that they really don’t have any food and are eating
small rations of rice and
that’s about it. We then get Jimmy T. making a fool out of himself with
the fishing net.
Jane (Who weirdly doesn’t get a name listing on the screen, I guess
because she’s not NaOnka
or Marty and thusly a waste of the producers time.) says she misses
Jimmy Johnson because
he was a leader and now this tribe is sorely lacking in leadership, she
says this mostly because
she has no idea a majority has formed without her knowledge.
We go to the younger tribe because we need ourselves endless NaOnka.
She explains that she
didn’t even know it rained the night before because the young people
have an excellent shelter,
she and Brenda then get to the business of completely ruining this game
by finding the hidden idol
and assuring us one of the biggest dirtbags in Survivor history will be
that much harder to remove
from the game.
They find it and this leads to NaOnka going on a series of irrational
crazy promos about what
an awesome player she is, how she found the idol on her own and figured
out the clues herself,
how the idol is in her sock (Note, it’s Fabio’s sock that she stole)
and now she figures out she’s
playing for a million dollars…Brenda tells her to keep the idol secret,
I guess because she wants
to have influence over the idol, but exactly how you control a crazy
person is beyond me.
Alina and Kelly B. who are now an alliance who no longer hate each
other, go looking for the idol,
this allows NaOnka to go after them and act like a dirtbag some more,
trash talking and insulting them.
Of course before this we got a NaOnka promo where she talked about
‘playing for a million bucks’
just sunk in, so of course she’s doing some fine Russell Hantz “Offend
potential jury members to
make sure they don’t give you the million dollars at the end”
Tactics. I mean honestly, the youngsters
have schooled the old folks 2 out of three challenges, only lost once
because of the medallion of power,
they have the medallion now so they are likely to win again, hell they
should crush the geezers down
to like, nobody, so odds are just by domination you’re gonna drag these
two girls you hate into the
jury phase, and thusly insure yourself you’ve lost two votes already
for the million dollars, good planning!
NaOnka talks about how her smacktalk will break Kelly B and she might
quit the game in the face
of such brutal insults. Kelly B says it’s hard to not react to being
insulted, but she won’t give in to NaOnka.
We go to the old folks camp and they talk about how hard this game has
been but they’ll suck it up
and keep going at it cause they feel like they’ve overcome the worst.
Marty talks about the need for
one leader at the challenge which gets Jimmy T. going on a rant about
wanting to be the leader,
he promos that Marty always ruins all his fun by shooting down his
The challenge is the standard “One person leads their blindfolded tribe
mates to objects they have
to find and bring back to the starting zone.” After you find 10 objects
you have to find a set of keys
and unlock a chest and bring it back to the start zone to win. Again
because the producers are cheap
as hell this is a double reward and immunity challenge.
Team Whippersnapper has the MoP and they decide to use it to get a 2
object head start, which is a
pretty big edge, Brenda is the caller for
her tribe, Tyrone is the caller for Team Geezer. The young folks
because they would win this if it was a straight up contest, so giving
them a head start is overkill.
We get back to old people’s camp after their defeat and Dan says “Well
I’m useless, but I doubt I’d
have dragged us down into a worse defeat
then the one we suffered, because man we got smoked.”
Dan is awesomely
stating his case here, who wouldn’t want this world beating dynamo on
Jimmy T. laments that if only he was the caller, man he’d have crushed
this challenge, the young kids
wouldn’t have had a chance and really
Tyrone blew it. Tyrone promos that he bitterly hates insane old
T. who really needs to shut up.
We go to Team Whippersnapper who celebrates their victory and all the
glory it gives them. Chase finds
the clue for the idol in the fishing
tackle box and tells Brenda, this leads to a long drawn out series of
where Brenda finally confesses to Chase that NaOnka has the
idol. Brenda does a promo that she can’t tell
NaOnka she told Chase or
else NaOnka will hate her. These people are really not understanding
can’t just have a 2 person alliance, where the hell is Sash in
all of this, didn’t he form the minority alliance,
where is the
invisible Purple Kelly, or Benry?
How is a 5 person alliance
controls this tribe now really just ‘The crazy lady who found the idol,
her friend, and her friend’s friend who can’t tell the crazy lady he
knows about the idol cause he’s in
the five person alliance but well,
the idol was a secret for only two of them to know about.’ I hate these
people, none of them have any idea how to play. Marty is playing
the game the best by far, and he’s
saddled with a tribe of losers he’ll
have to destroy.
God the young person tribe drives me up a wall because it’s 90% NaOnka,
5% the two girls she picks on
all the time, 3% Brenda and 2% Fabio
being an idiot. We are 4 shows into this season and I know next to
nothing about Sash, except that he had a stupid idea for an alliance
and he was accused of being gay…
I do in fact know nothing
Kelly or Benry. All I know about Alina is pretty much just
reactions to Kelly B. and NaOnka” and all I know about Kelly B is she
has one leg and her
having one leg REALLY offends NaOnka. That’s 5 out
of 9 people in the tribe who get next to no
air time, because NaOnka
needs all of it.
Over to the old folks and Jimmy T. calls out Marty for eating his sea
urchins without sharing with the group.
Marty is threatened with the
dreaded statement that he’s not a team player, which drives him up a
he promos that Jimmy T. has sealed his fate, and now he’s going
Jane and Holly talk about voting off Dan, since they are not in the
majority alliance and nobody tells them
what to do, they are voting
based off what Jimmy Johnson voted on the last episode. Man Jane really
crashed and burned, from making fire and fighting tooth and nail to win
a million dollars so she won’t
have to work so hard on her farm, to now
just voting based on what some guy voted at last tribal
not working to make alliances or keep yourself in the flow of your
Marty tells Jill that Dan must stay, because Dan’s tight in their
alliance and he’ll give them the votes
they need to boot Jimmy T. Jill
seems kinda beaten up at this point in the game, but she goes along
with Marty, because hell, it’s not her that’s being voted out.
Marty does a promo that Dan’s loyal and folks that’ll whine and bitch
about him keeping Dan around
will shut up once they see that Dan votes
the way Marty tells him to vote and this allows Marty to have
alliance that’ll run this game. Marty is playing Survivor, these other
rubes are just sorta loitering
around worried that they’ll offend the
sock stealing lunatic who they gave an idol too, it’s too bad
shake up will mess Marty’s game up big time.
Jill talks to Tyrone about getting on the “Vote Jimmy T.” out band
wagon, he seems set that Dan is
too big a gimp to keep around, this
gets Marty to give Tyrone the hard sell, and he again seems wary,
sits with Jimmy T. who goes on and on ranting and raving, Yve does a
promo that Jimmy T. is
insane, so well, he’s not in her good graces. So
she’s clearly voting against him. Exactly how Yve got
air time when
Marty coulda talked more about controlling the game, or NaOnka coulda
some more is beyond me.
Tribal, blah blah blah
5-3 Jimmy T. goes home, which lets Holly and Jane know they are next on
bye Jimmy T. you won’t be missed.
Once NaOnka found the idol in the young person’s camp, it was a 100%
cinch we were getting a
tribe mix up. The two reasons 1) The young
folks were killing the old folks and odds are no matter
how badly they
rigged things with the Medallion of Producer interference it was not
going to save
the show from a badly lopsided merger. 2) There was no
drama for the next 4 shows at least.
If the MoP did rig things to make
it a 2-2 split, then Holly and Jane go for the old folks,
and Alina and
Kelly B. go for the young folks. So you had a bunch of boring
votes lined up, and that makes for bad TV.
Idols are put into the show to screw with boring bloc voting domination
and they interject a dynamic
element to the game. If that element is
good or bad is pretty much for the viewer to decide,
but at this point
in the evolution of survivor where everyone understands ‘majority good,
and you just slap together 5 idiots and domination is
yours. I think they are a necessary evil.
Now for what you came to my recap for, insight into the new tribes!
info based off the new commercial for Survivor. See if I got this right
Marty got screwed on this
switch, he kept all of Jill from
his alliance and lost everyone else,
Holly and Jane are sheep he might
be able to pull into his flock, but the big problem is all the
know he has the idol, will they snitch? Kelly B. Holly and Jane win big
being removed from assured minority status and given a new lease
Chase loses Brenda, which
is a big blow for him since he
seems to be not much of a plotter and schemer.
But it is a 5-3 young
folk Vs old folk advantage and if they take the lazy way out, they can
just boot the
geezers, what with NaOnka having the idol, of course the
preview also hinted she’s crack and quit,
so she won’t because God is
never that kind to me, so I expect Dan to go home next while Yve and
Tyrone try to prove their worth. The young folks have a mix of those
who were in power and those
who were out of power, and none of them
know NaOnka has her idol, so it could be fun, if something
happens, but the “She’s hanging by a thread” comment seems to me to be
like ‘man, we need
NaOnka to stay strong so we can vote these old folks
out!” so ugh.
Tune in next week when we see I was 70% wrong about who went where
thusly everything I just typed above was a total waste of text.
Questions/comments send them to Mikethedealer@hotmail.com
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