Tonight starts sweeps weeks.
First - The "super-sized" Friends vs Kimmie in the Australian Outback.
Will we get more nasty talk from Kimmie tonight? Is a bear Catholic?
Friends goes forty minutes, then a live SNL Smirk skit or two.
After that, it's Regis against the best new drama C.S.I.
On the Discovery Channel, they're doing the Jesse Helms story - The Last Neanderthal.
After that, Kathie Lee's sweatshop gets torched (with the people still inside) on ER,
but you'll be busy watching Gorelost trying to pull my boot out in the bartcop.com chatroom.
In a way, I hate to promote this debate too much, because it's real possible Gorelost
will get cold feet, or will show up and agree with me on everything, like The Bird did,
or he'll claim he's got keyboard troubles like that Australian guy with the Atari 200 computer.
But, since ER really blows these days, it's not too much of a gamble, is it?
GE to cut 75,000 jobs?
Please make Tim Russert one of them.
NEW YORK (CNNfn) - General Electric Co.
is set to cut about 75,000 jobs
over the next two years, Business Week magazine reported Thursday, citing
Wall Street sources and people close to the company.
The magazine said those cuts, equal to about
15 percent of its work force, do
not include the 28,000 jobs being lost due to the closing of the discount retailer
Montgomery Ward, a subsidiary of GE Capital
God save us from the Smirk depression.
If only we had some fighters in the Senate...
Subject: Clinton's Speech
Clinton's speech will be to Wall Street investors.
According to Rush, Clinton knows NOTHING about matters economic.
Why do investment bankers want to hear Bill Clinton. Wouldn't
the efficiency of
Rush's precious free market cause them to reject a know-nothing like Clinton?
Lawrence O'Donnell said on TV the other day that Clinton is being offered
generous packages from the banks and big investment houses to be a consultant.
Pigboy is gonna scream when free market and efficient Bear Stearns or
CitiGroup or Prudential or whoever says, in effect "It's smart for us to pay
Big Bill Clinton $10 million per year for a few dozen hours worth of advice
about economic and business matters. He understands the economy."
Why don't the big money houses pay Rush $10 million per year for economic
and business advice?
Today in History
1964: The governor of Indiana declared "Louie
Louie," by the Kingsmen
to be pornographic and asked the stations not to play it.
Thirty-six years later, does anybody know the words to Louie Louie?
Subject: Yo Liberal!!
Hey your site sucks and Democrats
are white/black trash.
Why don't you get a job instead of messing around with this dumbshit website
and stop collecting your welfare checks and medicaid.
You want big government so much move to Iran.
Sir or madam,
There's no need to move to Iran.
Smirk and Ashcroft are moving Iran to the United States, haven't you heard?
Because of the spineless Democrats, we're going to have Ashcroft enforcing
a federal religion, backed by the new-and-improved homestyle military.
Starting in 2002, women must be covered from head-to-toe in black,
and there's going to be a complete ban on rock n roll (but country is allowed)
and all forms of liquor (except Jim Beam) and Hugh Henfer will be in the cell next to mine.
Field Marshall Ashcroft will make America just like you want it.
By the way, what religion are you?
You'll have to register, you know...
PS. Do you know where a Catholic with ADD and an IQ of 64 could get a job?
Smirk Caught on Open Mic Again
I read your stuff every day...
Most of it I love and I laugh out loud at a lot of it too.
Butt.... butt... butt...
Do you think you might cool it with the "Democrats
are bending over and
taking it up the ass" jokes, the "I'm Daschle and my mouth and throat
are soooo sore from Republican cock" jokes?
I'm sorry, I laughed when I read that.
As pro-gay rights as I am, I still have some redneck in me.
They really must seen funny to a lot of people
(especially straight guys I guess),
people who think that the fag/sissy thing is the last safe form of insult left.
Many gay people like myself (the non-Republican
ones) know all about
having a spine, and not betraying themselves to just "get along." It's
how we avoid self-destructing in our teens, and how we manage to make
our own lives in the face of shit that's said: words like faggot,
cocksucker, gerbilboy (one of you favorites I think)... you get the idea.
But, the gerbil stories about Rush are true.
Why do you think he's off again this week?
How do you think he lost all that weight?
One of them knicked his large intestine and he got infected.
You can't ask me to give that up...
So from the first, your analogy of the Dems being
butt-boys for the
Repugs is flawed. The Democrats would do well to follow the gay lead and
have a nice violent little riot in Congress. Ever hear of Stonewall, 1969?
I am ignorant of Stonewall 1969.
Let me make a suggestion. All the jellyfish and
scared rabbit jokes you
want to make, you make. We'll see if any animals complain. They usually
don't have internet, or political opinions for that matter.
Thanks for reading this, BartCop.
Man Who Wishes He Had a Party to Really Belong To
Tom, good letter, valid complaint.
I see what you're saying, and I'll make an effort to rein that in,
but I've often said I speak the language most Americans use.
"Bending over" was a phrase long before I was born.
I get the same thing from women.
"Stop saying the weasel Democrats 're a bunch of pussies."
As the web site gets bigger, my vocabulary gets smaller
because I'm sure to piss off somebody with each issue.
I can't promise it won't happen again, because we're in a particularly
volatile time but I will make the effort. Feel free to remind me when I slip.
(I thought of this after I answered you, Tom)
Surely, you don't think gays should be exempt from humor.
I remember 25 years ago, Chris Miller from National Lampoon gave a speech
and he was asked about doing "cripple jokes."
He said he understood the concern, but he'd gotten letters from amputees saying,
"Thank you for including us, people always dance around us because they're too
afraid to speak freely, and when you do cripple jokes it makes me feel more included."
So, can you point me to acceptable gay humor?
Possibly similarly, I think Richard Pryor had a whole lot to do with helping race relations
because he did "nigger jokes." By getting whitey to laugh at the absurdities,
he showed the hypocrisies of hating someone because of their color.
So point me to some acceptable gay humor.
I'm often ignorant and need educating.
Maybe I could help move gay humor forward.
Being outrageous has always been part of humor.
I don't think you'd want me too politically correct.
Subject: walter williams
Did you happen to catch good ol' Walter
Williams talking about the
list of chores that he keeps in his wallet? He said that when his wife
finishes up her chores and asks if she can go out and do things that he
pulls out a list of chores and has her do them. He then continues on
explaining to his listeners that their wedding vows were for her to be
obedient, and he makes her stay that way.
Appallingly enough, he continued in this vein
with the next few callers,
asking them if they kept their wives "in line" as he does.
The only things he hadn't mentioned were "barefoot" and "pregnant".
This this the mind frame that we have to deal with for the next four years?
I'm scared, Bartcop.
I'm pretty sure he was kidding about that.
One thing, tho...
His name is Wayne Williams, not Walter.
He was convicted of killing young black boys 20 years ago in Atlanta,
but those types of people appeal to Pigboy, so they hired lawyers to
get Williams out so he could sub for Rush during gerbil weeks.
That's the real outrage.
Salute to John Ashcroft
The good news is
that Salon.com ad seemed to do a lot of good.
Thirteen days after it ran, I continue to get e-mail from first-timers saying they saw
the ad at Salon and decided to check out bartcop.com and they liked it.
The hammer has increased in size, but it's
hard to say how much.
Counters that are real and accurate cost almost $1,000 each year.
I will not pay that much for a counter.
(If you know of a high-volume counter that works - e-mail me)
bad news is
would like to make the hammer bigger, still.
(Wouldn't it have been nice to have had a hueueueuege hammer this morning?
Wouldn't it be nice to hear a senate Demo say, "If I vote for Ashcroft,
that bartcop.com hammer will kick my ass, so we better vote against.")
But a bigger hammer costs money, so during
the month of February, you might see
some requests to throw bartcop.com some spare change, or you could
visit the BartCop store and buy something totally useless like a coffee mug.
I don't want to bombard you with ads 24/7/52, so I thought of a plan.
The good news is
if I only hold my fund raisers when the networks are doing
sweeps weeks, they'll seem rare and distant most of the time. When you see
a request for money, you'll know there is some killer TV on that night.
Specials, high-profile movies, and new shows from all your top-rated favorites
(except for West Wing, of course, which will feed us any old rerun and still
snag the Number Seven spot on the Neilsen ratings)
The bad newsis
I know some of you are gagging at the thought of seeing
a bunch of "send money" ads, but is there an alternative? Can we rule out the
possibility that bartcop.com might possibly have an effect someday?
During the theft of 2000, Dave, SNL and Jon Stewart were Bush's biggest enemies.
(Koresh knows Gore and the DNC posed no threat to those f-ing thieves.)
The good news is
this bit is almost over, so don't be surprised if you see
Tina the Pay Pal girl show up in the near future. She's really very nice.
By the way, I'm very appreciative of the donations that have been sent.
When the Salon.com ad seemed to have bombed, I was in a panic mostly
at the humiliation of being the dork who threw your money away,
but thank Koresh that turns out not to have been the case.
So let's get back to the comedy and the Smirk-bashing.
Koresh, it's soooo embarrassing
Even the Russians are making fun of the "White Flag" Americans
We seemed to be saying that the presidency of George W. Bush is somehow illegitimate,
based on a brutal display of partisan interference by a Supreme Court faction that had clear
and undeniable financial stakes involved in the outcome, and on a concerted campaign of
racial disenfranchisement in Florida the likes of which have not been seen since the
decades following the Civil War.
Subject: Democrat Bendover
Is it my imagination or does the unbelievable
willingness of the Democratic Party to bend
to the will of our selected president and his party extinguish any lingering doubts about the
Green's referring to the two parties as tweedle-dee and tweedle-dum?
Besides my respect for Democrats, nothing else has been extinguished.
If you're suggesting the fella that gave the election to Smirk was right, you're wrong.
The Democrats fought hard as hell, they just didn't fight smart.
Is there some strategy of the Democrats
that I am missing here?
With Clinton gone, the Democrats are scared and spineless.
It looks like we'll have to wait until Hillary gathers enough chits to start her move
on the White House because the cowards we elected have nothing but chapped lips
from kissing the ass of the bastard who raped this country's constitution.
Asshole of the Week
by Johnny Angel
Subject: 50 in the Senate, mostly worthless
Daschle is gonna be a catastrophe. He voted to
confirm that right-wing whore
Norton (which, in my mind, makes him partially responsible for any disasters
she does to the environment). And today driving home I heard him whining on
the radio that the Democrats need to get at least 30 no-votes against Ashcroft
to make a point. Fuck him and fuck the Senate Democrats.
Not one of those pusillanimous Senators stood
up when real Democrats in the House
got up and challenged Bush's coup d'etat. And now he and his cohorts have pressured
Kennedy into backing down from fighting a real fight against Bush's attempt to
saddle the country with what will potentially be the worst disaster of an
AttorneyGeneral in the history of this nation.
I just heard that lying Ari sack of shit saying
we need to have an Attorney General
confirmed immediately so he can enforce CIVIL RIGHTS LAWS. These people have
no shame whatsoever and all we have between us and a fascist theorcracy led by a pack
of Greed-crazed, Hate-mongering maniacs, are a bunch of high-paid professional victims
who don't even have a concept of what a real fight is all about.
The Senate Democrats are gonna be absolutely worthless.
How the hell are we
gonna curb the right-wing excesses we can all see are comin' round the bend?
Howie, I couldn't have said that better myself.
Matter of fact, I had to look up pusillanimous
From the first four letters, I got my first clue - I was right.
pusillanimous - lacking courage and resolution, marked by contemptible timidity
The pusillanimous cowardly
Democrats who support Ashcrofts attacks on women,
blacks, gays, sensible gun laws and the environment are:
John Breaux - wants a job under
Smirk, if you know what I mean
Chris Dodd - you mean we gotta put up with Pigboy's sex jokes and
the cold-hearted bastard won't even vote like a Democrat?
Russ Feingold - he should just turn into an elephant.
He's been stabbing us in the back for years
KKK Byrd - again, we gotta put up with all of Rush's reminders that Byrd
is/was as big a Nazi as Ashcroft, and he votes against us?
Zell Miller - we thought we gained something when we picked up a democrat.
We didn't gain shit.
Conrad and Dagger - two nobody's from Dakota. THIS is why Dakota and Carolina
should only have two senators - total.
Nelson - never heard of him.
The Smirk Recession Continues to Loom
"The Federal Reserve cut its benchmark
interest rate by half a percentage point for
the second time in four weeks, making clear that it intends to wage an aggressive battle
against the growing possibility of a recession,"
-- the NYW Times reports.
"The central bank also said it sees continued
risk of economic weakness."
-- the Whore Street Journal
"The Fed was signaling they're likely
to cut rates again."
-- Bloomberg says
We never had these troubles when Clinton was driving.
The Whore Street Journal reports
"Clinton will address 1,000 or so junk-bond
investors and issuers
at a Morgan Stanley Dean Witter annual high-yield conference
-- his first paid speech as an ex-president."
Price tag: $100,000
Good for him!
I hope he does a hundred speeches like that a year.
I can hear the vulgar Pigboy and Hannity now:
"But how much will he give to charity?"
"But how much will he give to charity?"
"But how much will he give to charity?"
"But how much will he give to charity?"
The ditto-monkey congress fabricated dozens of wild-ass fishing
forcing Clinton into millions of dollars of debt so now he's going to make some
money and if someone doesn't like it they can kiss his ass.
Our guy gets elected and is hunted for eight long years.
Their guy steals the goddamn election and the Democrats are kissing his ass.
Oh, Dear God, what did we do to earn your wrath?
He says I've been ducking him for eight weeks.
Tonight is "No mercy" night.
Good stuff, Penny.
Subject: Faith-based nonsense
The following letter appeared in the San Francisco Chronicle today:
"Will any branches of Satanic churches be
eligible for "faith-based"
charity funds proposed by the Bush administration?"
No, you silly goose.
Here's how that'll work:
All we need is someone with a good heart and a strong mind to separate the "real religions"
from the "gutter religions" so the "bad people" don't get any of this stolen taxpayer money.
I suggest Field Marshall John Ashcroft.
He will be the moral arbiter elegantiarum of which religions are "real."
Field Marshall Ashcroft has a "good heart."
We must put our faith in the federal government to do the right thing.
Trust the government - they've come to teach us about the "real" God.
This is so fucking outrageous,
I don't know how the non-humor websites can stand it.
Ralph Nader's Skeleton Closet
Smirk the Wartime Deserter
by Tally Briggs / Actress at Large
One slight addition:
Ms. Briggs says "Desertion will get you time in the Federal Pen, and a Dishonorable Discharge."
I called former PFC. Eddie Slovik, trying to get a quote.
I was not able to talk to him - you know why?
Because he's DEAD, because sometimes they execute wartime deserters!!
But in today's whore America, we have a wartime deserter installed
against our will,
and the Senate Democratic Leaders kiss the ass of the goddamn thief.
Oh, God, what have we done to make you so incredibly angry with us?
Agency Asked to Probe White House
from the Moonie Times
Whore City - Rep. Bob Barr (R-Passing for
white) has asked the General Accounting Office
to investigate vandalism at the White House by employees of the previous administration.
The call for the federal government oversight
agency to look into the cost of the vandalism comes
despite efforts by the Smirkettes to downplay a spate of pranks by members of the Clinton staff.
Reported pranks ranged from the removal of the
W key from some computer keyboards to
the writing of graffiti in bathrooms and an office hallway and from severing or crossing of
phone lines to the placing of makeshift signs on walls and doors.
In addition, new reports have surfaced of graffiti
and inappropriate phone messages in the
Old Executive Office Building, next door to the White House.
The GAO said it had not yet assigned anyone to
handle Barr's request.
The agency had said it could conduct an audit of the damage and the cost to taxpayers
if a respected member of Congress requested one.
Barr said he would look for a co-sponsor.
GAO spokeswoman Laura Kopelson said that when
the request to assess White House vandalism
was assigned to a staffer, ``we would have to ask the White House just what went on there.''
Yeah, put that idiot Smirk under oath and have him say what he, personally, saw.
Waves of Regret
Demo leader Tom Daschle, (D-Kisses Smirk's
Ass) said it would be "troubling"
if his party couldn't produce at least 30 votes against the Ashcroft monster,
whose confirmation is virtually assured.
What's troublking is that YOU can't produce 50 Democratic votes to stop
this throwback monster who can't stand blacks, women, gays or a clean environment.
Tell me, Tom, what do Democrats stand for?
Wait, there's more...
The LA Times notes that Daschle said
"he had no strong objections to a congressional inquiry
into the last-minute pardon granted fugitive billionaire Marc Rich by former President Clinton."
Tommy, what's your plan?
You going to asist Smirk at reversing the
Constitution on pardons?
You going to impeach Clinton again, Tommy?
What the fuck is the purpose of ANOTHER inquiry, besides kissing Smirk's ass?
Are you going to file charges against somebody?
Or just grandstand for the TV cameras and say "Harrumpf?"
Jesus Christ, Tommy, you're the Democratic
LEADER in the Senate.
If you offer your ass to Smirk, what will the other Democrats learn?
It's a little early, and I hope it doesn't
come to this,
but Tommy the Traitor makes a memorable alliteration
Watch your ass, Mr Daschle.
Attention - Tom Daschle and all Senate Democrats
The Farmer and the Snake
ONE WINTER a Farmer found a Snake stiff
and frozen with cold.
He had compassion on it, and taking it up, placed it in his bosom.
The Snake was quickly revived by the
warmth, and resuming its
natural instincts, bit the shit out of its benefactor,
inflicting a mortal wound on his foolish, foolish ass.
"Oh," cried the Farmer with his last
"I am rightly served for pitying a scoundrel."
The greatest kindness will not bind the ungrateful.
A Poem by Shirley
The Clinton's Gift Rap
But the media's condemnations of the Clinton gifts were so swift, so visceral
and so personal that they laid bare one last time an unchecked venom many in
the political press simply cannot mask. And the truth got trashed along the way.
Bush pushes his luck
Florida findings should give him pause
Special report: George Bush's America
George Bush has been in effusive mood this past week, his first in office,
shaking hands, slapping backs and turning on the charm. His sense of wonder
at his White House surroundings would be almost touching were it not as
tacky as the redecorated Oval Office's peaches-and-cream colour scheme.
"Today everything is so promising and new," he told his assembled staff.
"My hope is that the day will never come when some of us take this honour for granted."
Mr Bush acts like a man who can hardly believe his luck.
An awful lot of American voters cannot believe his luck, either.
As a painstaking Washington Post analysis of election records in eight Florida counties has now established beyond reasonable doubt, the state's voters were disenfranchised last November in extraordinarily large numbers by inadequate, antiquated balloting machinery and misleading procedures.
The intention of 45,608 of them was to vote for Al Gore, while 17,098 backed Mr Bush. But all these ballots were declared invalid due to double or multiple-punching. A separate investigation, into the notorious Palm Beach dimpled chads, found Mr Gore should have benefited from a net gain of 682 votes. Mr Bush was officially declared the winner in Florida last month by a margin of 537 votes.
This ruling, fixed in stone by the Supreme Court when it halted all recounts, handed him the presidency over which he now unctuously gloats. But it does not take a mathematical genius to work out that the will of the Floridian (and thus the national) electorate was thwarted, the outcome was an avoidable travesty, and it is Mr Gore who by right should be picking out drapes in the west wing.
Nothing fundamental is going to change now, it seems. Under America's odd rules, it is all too late. Some states may modernise their voting systems; Mr Gore is embarking on a teaching career. Move on, say all those smirking Republicans. But is it really too much to ask Mr Bush to show a bit of humility in the face of this hard evidence that Florida was a shaming, fixed-up farce?
His very first initiative as president was to rescind US funding for
family planning groups providing abortion advice overseas.
He simply has no mandate for such crass, divisive, ideologically driven steps.
And is it too much to ask opposition
Democrats in Congress to stop fawning over the new man?
Most Americans did not want Mr Bush.
Their voices must be heard.
Copyright Guardian Newspapers Limited
Daily Telegraph- Bush Team Lying About Vandalism
as seen on Steve's Political Page
President Clinton has asked for a detailed accounting of what went wrong
during his staff's departure, amid suspicions that the Bush camp overplayed the
charges against his team. The Telegraph has learnt that the former president's
office contacted the White House on Friday to request a written report.
Jake Siewert, Mr Clinton's former press secretary, said: 'We'd like
explanation of what, if anything, was amiss. I was one of the last to leave the
West Wing and I saw nothing obviously wrong. If there was any serious vandalism
it's something President Clinton would like to hear about and have some way of redressing."
Accounts of the damage were hotly disputed by former Clinton officials.
long-serving White House official said: "Other than the offices being dirty and big
bags of trash, I didn't notice anything." Mr Siewert said that newspaper reporters
were among those on board Mr Clinton's final flight and noticed nothing amiss.
"At one point as we were about to drink some toasts we hit turbulence
eight or 10 glasses on a tray fell off and broke," he said. "I have since
checked with the stewards and apart from maybe one or two hand towels
missing, that was it." He recalled that when the Clinton administration took
over from George Bush Sr eight years ago, incoming staff found lamps glued
to tables and signs accusing Mr Clinton of being a "draft dodger" stuck to
walls. Other notices warned: "We'll be back in four years."
Overall, the new First Couple appear delighted with their new home.
Oval Office was redecorated in creams and yellows last weekend and a new
carpet fitted, with Mr Clinton's desk - first used by President John F Kennedy
- the only fixture unchanged. "If Mr Bush could have given the office corners,
he would have done," one insider said.
If it was so bad, why didn't they let anyone take pictures, or gather
The whole story is a fraud.
Just like "I trust the people."
Looking up in Texas, but
by Molly Ivins
How pathetic for W. Bush to claim that Ashcroft has "a good heart."
A good heart is precisely what Ashcroft has demonstrated he does not have.
(The term `heart,' by the way, is a new synonym on the Christian right for `soul,'
according to an article in `The Washington Post.'
Click on Smirk
Worth a Repeat Quotes
I did not sell guided
missiles to that country, ...Iran.
--Reagan and Bush, both, year after year, under oath
...and Clinton fudged on testimony about a blow job?
That makes him a criminal president?
...and Reagan and Bush get a fucking pass?
Because their crimes didn't involve Clinton's cock?
Make them stop!
Transcript of Susan McDougal kicking Hannity's ass
Thanks to Jesse
Regular readers know I never, ever brag on myself - and when
it's because if I don't do it, nobody else will.
A while back, I dunno, six months ago...
I predicted that the economy would turn to pure shit when Clinton left.
If someone runs across that, could you tell me what issue it's
I'd like to rub it in some ditto-monkey's face.
Democrats slam Capitol Hill doors on Nader-Traitor
Whore City — Ralph Nader's former allies, angered by his role
in helping Smirk
win the White House, are taking steps that could reduce his clout in Congress.
"Who's going to work with him now?" says Rep. John Conyers. (D- Weak, but loyal)
The backlash against Nader is widespread. Democrats are slamming
doors on Capitol Hill.
Some liberal activists have stopped contributing to his consumer groups.
Joan Claybrook, president of Public Citizen, which Nader founded
in 1971, says
lawmakers have told her that they will not work with his traitorous ass.
He was even rebuffed from testifying at Senate hearings on John Ashcroft's
nomination as attorney general.
"We're not going to touch him with a 10-foot pole," Rep. Robert
Wexler, D-Fla., says.
"He has divorced himself from the very ideals that made him a worthwhile political actor.
He sold out his constituency."
Smirk Under Oath?
Famous Whore Quotes
By almost every account, George Bush
is off to a very
Granted, it is hard to look bad when you're playing off the Clinton farewell tour,
with all of the pardons and parting gifts and the occasional acts of vandalism.
But give the new man credit.
-- Bob Schieffer, Senior Whore, CBS News
Bob, go suck some bus exhaust, will you?
You're a standout whore in a room full of whores.
It's hard to believe I used to say "less whore than some" when talking about Bob Schieffer
The Ronnie Reagan Horror Show transcript
Thanks to Mark
There is "popular rage at the blatant injustice of
and the illegitimate presidency that is assuming power," notes The Nation
this week in an issue titled "The Tainted Presidency."
"Our soundings tell us that this anger is widely
shared around the country,"
it states, telling Democrats to "rediscover their progressive voice" or else
"the people will organize to keep the pressure on."
Subject: Holy irritated Righters, Bartcop!
I sent you an unassuming
piece of fan mail yesterday or the day before and you posted it
on your site (I wasn't expecting you to, but it was flattering, thanks) and I've gotten three letters
from pissed-off Republicans. Letters I didn't ask for. Nice, huh?
The most recent letter is from an enlightened
fellow named "The Bird" who called me tacky names
and forgot to put question marks at the ends of his questions. I can only imagine the hate mail you get.
It's funny, though--being called stupid by a few folks who don't run spellcheck.
I have saved this
angry, unsolicited mail and I will surely post it in my news article when
the school's newspaper starts up again, so that everyone can see the Right's most enlightened side.:)
Morgan, sorry about that Bird guy.
We know him well, I put my big boot in his ass back in Ocober or so.
believe it or not, he's one of the smartest ditto-monkeys on the net.
Next time I pummel him, I'll make him apologize to you before I let him go.
Clinton Lies and Is Impeached;
Ashcroft Commits Perjury and Becomes Attorney General.
Subject: Faith Based Charity
I have a question for all the ditto monkeys as per their desire to see
new idea of Bush's become reality: How is it that on the one hand, you are
like a damned tape loop when it comes to the mantra of "less government is
better, smaller government is better" when any program (other than the sacred
military) is proposed, but are gung-ho over a welfare scam that dwarves AFDC
in terms of the bureaucracy that will be created to implement this "faith-based relief"?
Has it ever occured to the nutbags who lap up Evangelical offerings
like it was cocaine
at Studio 54 that there are hundreds of "faiths" in America, all of whom will be dying to
do what the Right has been claiming is poisonous, namely suckling at the government's teat?
Lining up with their schemes to fill their coffers they surely will
and who then will decide who gets what? An enormous Federal agency of some
kind to go through these grant-requests one by one, plus the K-Street
lobbying arm of the so-called faiths wining and dining the heads of this
agency, plus, well, we've seen this boondoggle so many times in DC that it
makes our collective head spin, but what makes it twirl right off our sagging
shoulders is this: These are the same people who endlessly decry the "welfare
state", and yet are poised to remake another one, only this time, with a
disclaimer--it isn't "handouts" or "free money" it is now
"spiritually-based", like it's some kind of donation.
Paid for by guess whom? Whose hierarchy is paid for by guess whom?
Whose soon-to-be bloated beyond recognition, bright-crimson-from-all-the-incipient-red-tape
monolith of a program will be top heavy with pseudo-spiritualist sponges doling out the moolah
to their snake-oil selling brethren on the other side of this bunk-laden equation.
Can you imagine what the "guidelines" or "directives" are going to look like for
this scam, and how many think-tank sponges are going to be paid beaucoup
bucks to concoct this drivel, all for the purpose of MAKING THE FEDERAL
GOVERNMENT EVEN BIGGER THAN IT ALREADY IS!!!!!!
Which we thought was the worst thing imaginable to the conservative
Wrong again---A big government that squashes personal liberty (other than
that of amassing an arsenal, of course) is fine, one that enforces
restrictions on business or tries to collect taxes is bad. A big government
that squelches free speech, prevents states from making laws that the Right
Wing dislikes or closes down elections is good, a big government that tries
to prevent monopolies, pollution,dicrimination, sexual harrassment--bad.
So let it be said that once again, the conservative's basic premise,
are only operating on principle rather than for personal gain (because they
believe in "honor and dignity" y'see) has been shattered, fact is, they love
big government as much as any liberal does, especially when said government
puts conditions on what constitutes the grounds for a "handout", as opposed
to simply giving whatever the people need when they need it, sans proseletizing.
And if the government can appoint a gazillion Falwellesque cronies
to lifetime jobs on the DC dole, all the better.
Don't it make ya feel sick?
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It had everything - Susan McDougal, fishcide and sensuous red lips.
Copyright © 2001, bartcop.com
Thanks for the fumble, Dude.