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Volume 896 - Rise Up


Friday   Sept 20, 2002


"Are we getting the cooperation we need? Absolutely not,"
      --  Sen. Richard C. Shelby (R - Ala.), of the Senate Intelligence committee,
           trying to get 9-11 information from the Guilty Administration

  Full  Story

   Follow Up
  9/11 Probers Say Agencies, Officials Failed to Heed Data

   Click  Here

 In July 2001, for instance, the CIA warned senior government officials that "based on a
 review of all-source reporting over the last five months, we believe that bin Laden will launch
 a significant terrorist attack against U.S. and/or Israeli interests in the coming weeks.
 The attack will be spectacular and designed to inflict mass casualties against U.S. facilities
 or interests. Attack preparations have been made. Attack will occur with little or no warning."

 And what did our "president" do with this information?

 He took another month-long vacation to talk to the cows in Crawford.

   "Things sure would be easier if
     I was a dictator - yuk, yuk.
   Lucky me - I hit the trifecta!"

Yeah, and "lucky" for America you stole the election, Oil Boy.

 Was Bush a wartime deserter or merely AWOL?
  Let's check the record:

 From Title 10, USC Uniform code of Military Justice,Section 808, Article 8, Section 885.

 A military deserter is defined as a service member absent from his duty station for more than
 thirty days or is absent for any length of time and illustrates intent to never return to his duty station.

 Military service members are considered absent without leave (AWOL) if they are absent from a
 duty post for any period of time up to a maximum of thirty days and have not displayed an intent
 to fail to return to their duty station.  A deserter that is arrested and held for military authorities
 should be considered as 8 (sic) felony offender.  A service member classified as AWOL is
 considered to be a misdemeanor offender and will not be arrested unless there are local
 civilian criminal or traffic charges.

 I guess that underlined part is how Bush got away with it.  He always intended to return,
 once he got the cocaine flushed out of his system so he could take the physical required
 to keep flying those out-of-date National Guard jets that they couldn't use in Vietnam.
 Daddy knew just the right place to hide Little Georgie.

  Unka Dick, can I ask you some question?
  What's the statue of liberations on being AHOL?
  And if I get founded out, can you pardon me?

Subject: Unheeded Warnings

Resident Bush insists the recession we're not in began before he took office.
  Yet he failed to take any action to stop it in it's tracks.

Resident Bush had clear warning Al Qaeda was planning to attack with hijacked airplanes.
  Yet he failed to take any action to prevent it.

Resident Bush swears Iraq is producing WMDs.
  Yet he hasn't demanded that any company supplying Iraq with WMD tools and technology
  be held accountable for aiding and abetting the enemy. (You know, like Halliburton.)

Isn't there something in the Constitution about the right of the people to overthrow the
government if it fails in it's primary duty to protect us from enemies both foreign and domestic?

Winston Proles.


 "I guess he's never seen this show..."
    -- Dave, wondering why Clinton would agree to be a guest

 Vegas Dave has new stuff, including a Gambling Quiz

 Click  Here

 Why are the cowards in the White House calling for blood?

  Click  Here

 We have a renegade president and vice president, neither of whom ever wore a military uniform
 in combat -- and neither of whom was duly elected by the majority of America's voters -- lumbering
 drunkenly around the globe looking to kick some ass. Well, looking for surrogates -- yours and my
 sons and daughters -- to kick some ass for them.

 Why, he asks?

 News we can't see because Karl Rove won't allow it

 Subject: US--Censored News

 Bush to bulldoze military action vote through Congress

 America had 12 warnings of 9-11 aircraft attack

 Twin towers relatives 'will miss out on millions'

 Bush aide failed to stop fraud in fund for US tribes


 "The stock market goes up and down all the time."
     -- The vulgar Pigboy, pretending it's not Bush's fault.

 That's right, Rush.
 It went up under Clinton and down under Bush.
 Clinton taxed the rich, Bush is taxing the working class.
 Clinton cut spending, Bush tripled spending.
 Clinton paid down the debt with his surplus,
 Bush gave the surplus to his friends and caused the Bush recession

 Rush is right - the market goes up and down.


Subject: Lynne Cheney at the Plaza

My wife was just getting her hair done in the Plaza Hotel in NYC and all of a sudden
news comes that Lynne Cheney is coming for an appointment.

Next thing you know they're taping paper over the windows (cause they're not bullet-proof),
sending in dogs to sniff everyone's purses, secret-service everywhere, cops surrounding the Hotel.
Soon her highness arrives and they start telling all the women there to move to the closet in the back
(OK some other room).  My wife, who is in the middle of a shampoo, suds in her eyes, says
"I'm not moving!" - her hairdresser (in that priceless bitchy hairdresser voice) says "She's not moving!".

Moral of the story - You really haven't lived until you get your purse sniffed
by German shepherds while you're getting a perm. What a country!

Mike B


 Want to protest Oilman's lust for Iraq's oilfields?
  ...and the hundreds or thousands of lives it will cost us, not counting them?



 They're organizing in Austin HOUSTON for a Sept 28th (BartFest Day) protest.

 You want to be in the same city as the Illegal Usurper.

 ...and don't bring your babies!


"The economy is just terrible. You look at it and itís just gone to hell.
  This will give you an idea of just how bad things are. Every morning
  thereís a guy that stands out front and gives me the finger. Now that
  times are tough he had to take a second job giving the finger to Regis."
         -- Dave

  Shuck and Jive


 Poor Rosie
  Isn't it sad?

 Thursday's USA Today said her magazine (was it called 'Rosie'?) is folding.
 There's just one last issue, so let's all be sure and buy it, being a collector's item and all...
 The poor bagle-cutter has lost everything.

 She's lost her "I hate Clinton" talk show, which is really hard to do in America...
 She's lost her lil' magazine, oh, and there's a possible explanation why, ...have you heard?

 ha ha

 USA Today (R-Liars) said one reason for her "creative differences" with the hands-on
 producers of the rag was that Rosie wanted Boy George and Mike Tyson on the cover.

 You can't know how much it pains me to say I might rather see Rosie's face on her magazine
 instead of the sweet, attention-grabbing faces of Boy George and Mike Tyson.
 Add to that, her current movie career seems to rival mine.

 But Bart, but Bart!
 What about Rosie's new career in stand up comedy?

 Her stand up career seems to come to a screeching (word intentional) halt
 the night decided to personally slur America's most popular president.

 So, let's re-cap:

 Rosie no longer has a TV show.
 Rosie no longer has a magazine.
 Rosie no longer has a movie career.
 Rosie no longer has a stand up career.

<poignant pause>

 Y'know what the saddest part is?

 Rosie self-destructed before I had a chance to put The BartCop Hex on her.
 That's some sad shit.

 Bye, Rosie..

 Don't let your hero worship for Dubya hit you in the ass on the way out.

 If you're in the greater Chesterfield, IL area,
 check out Bob Smith Auction Service for all your auction needs.

 Nobody can call an auction like Bob!

Could the Greens explain again how
the Democrats and the GOP are the same?

 Not to worry - John Ashcroft is on the job

  Click  Here

 Did you see what happened in Chicago?
 At the Kansas City baseball game, two nutjobs ran on the field and attacked first base coach
 Tom Gamboa with their fists. What happened next was hard to believe. The entire Kansas City
 bench got medieval on their punk asses like Marsellus Wallace in a really bad mood.

 I'm talking about a human tidal wave. They pounced on those skels like killer bees.
 After a few minutes, someone dragged the bums away from the mob - but why?
 I like a little street justice - when the scumbags are this guilty.

 When you commit a life-and-death felony in front of TV cameras, thousands of
 spectators and 40 of the victim's closest friends, it's time to party!

 When it was over, Gamboa had a bloody face but was otherwise OK.
 If you have a chance to watch the replay - do it.

 Full Story

 If you have cable or DSL, click on this:


Subject: Marines Killed in Beirut

BC, In the early 90s I had an employee who had been in the Air Force during the Beirut Barracks massacre.
The rubble from the barracks, body parts and all, were taken to a hanger in Germany where my employee (P)
and a handful of others were charged with the task of separating bodies, parts of bodies, and rubble.
She emphatically SWEARS, and I unequivocally believe her, that over 600 bodies were in that rubble.

She and the others were sworn to secrecy, told never to reveal the actual number, and to always stick with
the "241 killed" version. She has a certificate from the military which I saw, commending her for this specific
work where "241 Marines lost their lives".

Over the years I've discreetly mentioned this to a few people who mainly said that either P was lying, or you
can't cover-up the death of 350 extra Marines.. I don't know enough about the procedures or protocols to
make a conclusion about this. Perhaps the other 350 were locals or some sort of mercs. But knowing P I am
certain that she and her colleagues found over 600 in that pile.

Feel free to discuss this with people you know. If Raygun did lie I'd like to see the truth come out somehow,
but I wouldn't want the current regime sending P (or you or me) to Gitmo..


 Know your enemy
   by the Wise Guy

  Click  Here

 From: Bill Adler

 Keep up the good work, Bart.
 Your efforts are appreciated by dozens of people who care enough
 to pull their heads out of their flags to look at the facts, painful as they may be.

 If you have time, please read a stunning article by Carol A Valentine titled,
 Operation 911: No Suicide Pilots



 I think these questions will stay with us until somebody addresses them.
 I know everyone's first reaction to this stuff is "kookville," but who can explain
 why our fighter jets stayed on the ground for an hour during the attacks?

 New rule - just for today:
 If you write and say "Bart, you're crazy to consider this possibility,"
 then you need to have an explanation of why we failed to fight back that day.
 We pay billions for fighter jets that aren't srambled when we're under attack?

 If I'm not mistaken, the Pentagon plane hit one hour after the first tower was struck.

 If our fighter jets don't take off when we're under attack, when the hell DO they take off?
 On a sunny day when they think they need some practice?
 Practice for what?
 Practice for when the big attack comes?

 I can be at work 30 minutes after my alarm goes off.
 Why can't our fighter jets react as quickly as Ol' Bart?

 Or, ...did they have orders to stand down?

 Lastly, would evil men hesitate to kill 3,000 people if it meant
 they could get an iron grip on dominating the entire planet?

Woo Hoo!

Subject: A Poll Question For Gallup & USA Today

I've read this weeks' poll question where those polled are asked if they believe that Saddam
will be forthright about weapons inspections. Of course the majority said no. OK, let's ask the
people if they want Bush to invade Iraq or fix the struggling economy.

The Bush Recession is on the verge of a Bush Depression, and all we're talking about is invading
a 3rd world country and killing a bunch of innocent women and children. Sorry, but that's not a
priority with me. Let's talk about the crashed stock market, the high jobless rate, the huge budget
deficit, and our failed home security organization. All these areas will only get worse if we attack Iraq.
I can't believe how dumb this administration is. Let us ask this new poll question.

Greg Whitman

 Dark Passage
  by Chris Floyd

  Click  Here

 Iraq is just a stepping stone. Iran is next -- indeed, Cheney, Rumsfeld and the PNAC team
 say that Iran is "perhaps a far greater threat" to U.S. oil hegemony. Other nations will follow,
 including Russia and China. In one way or another -- by military means or economic dominance,
 by conquest, alliance or silent acquiescence -- they must all be brought to heel, forcibly
 prevented from "challenging our leadership or even aspiring to a larger regional or global role."

 You thought I was kidding about the B.F.E.E. taking over the whole world?
 You think they'd let a little thing like 3,000 September 11th lives get in their way?

 Oil men know only one thing - greed.


"We wanted to let Rush know that we've just uncovered the political affiliation of another
 American outlaw. David Westerfield, who was just convicted of kidnapping and murdering
 7-year-old Danielle van Dam, is a Republican  ...we're dying to hear Rush explain it all to us."
   -- The Smoking Gun

  Click  Here

  Dow Drops 230, Ends Below 8,000

   Click  Here

"Investors' emotions continue to drive the market. ... All you see is negative news,"
 said Thomas F. Lydon Jr. citing an earnings warnings by Electronic Data Systems,
 disappointing results at Morgan Stanley, a weak housing report and the war with Iraq.
"Investors on Wall Street are clamoring for good news that just isn't there."

 I just isn't right that after the Clinton Miracle saved us from Republican economic voodoo,
 the unelected President Pinhead gives the surplus to his friends and send our kids off to war.

 If only the Democrats had a half ounce of courage...

 I had a dream last night - or maybe it was a vision.

 I dreamed something really cool was gonna happen at BartFest.
 It was like, ...so that no-that-didn't-really-happen-did-it kinda cool.
 We'll have a camcorder there, so whatever happens won't be just a tall tale.


 ...wish I had this dream when there were still more tickets for sale.

 Today in History

 In 2000, Independent Counsel Robert Ray announced the end of the Whitewater investigation,
 saying there was insufficient evidence to warrant charges against Bill and Hillary Clinton.

 Of course, these crooked bastards could've announced that in 1993, but Mr Scaife paid
 for a whole series of scandals and, goddammit, he wanted his money's worth.
 The disgusting whores in the Republican party played along, and the all-white
 Supreme Court backed every illegal trick the sons of bitched pulled.

"Paula Jones has every right to sue President Clinton with no proof."
"Suing a sitting president won't cause much of a distraction at all."
"Oh, No, you mean Gore won Florida? That's terrible!"
"Countin the votes might cause permanant harm to petitioner Bush."

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 We've got to build a bigger hammer.
 The illegal President Monkey in a Man Suit needs to be stopped.

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 Hitler Remark Rankles White House

  Click  Here

 As tensions rise between the United States and Germany over Iraq, the White House called
 a German government minister's comparison of Bush to Hitler "outrageous and inexplicable."

 Justice Minister Herta Daeubler-Gmelin said that Bush was going after Iraq to divert
 attention from domestic problems. "That's a popular method. Even Hitler did that,"

 Propaganda Minister Ari Goebbels said,
 "This statement by the justice minister is outrageous and inexplicable,"

 Hey, Ari!
 If the swastika fits, you must admit.

 Democrats let Bush get away with it

  Click  Here

  ...the Democrats are allowing themselves to be dominated by Bush's political agenda
 instead of raising tough, legitimate questions on a military assault on Iraq. They should
 be asking the Bush administration whether overthrowing Saddam will actually make
 America safer from terrorist attacks, as there has been no irrefutable evidence linking
 Iraq and al-Qaida.

 Party in Vegas next weekend

 Tickets will start going out today!

Click  Here  for the latest BartFest update. 

 If you're going, you NEED to read this update.

 Click  Here  to see the BartFest Webcam.    It's GREAT at night!

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