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Volume 901 - Saddam or Pinhead?


 Thursday   Sept 26, 2002     We'll be in the desert next week, dark until Oct 6 or so. 
 Reminder: Saturday, LIVE from BartFest in Vegas - the MIRC chat room
7-10 Pacific time


"Who's the enemy here: the president of the United States or Saddam Hussein?"
          -- Trent Lott (R-White Sheets)  who doesn't know, either

 Dry drunk: Is Bush making a cry for help?
          by Alan Bisbort  as seen on AMPOL

  Click  Here

"Alcoholics Anonymous has a name for someone who is a drunk in every way except
 for the actual imbibing of spirits. They call that person a "dry drunk." This is not a
 judgmental term, nor should this be a judgmental topic in America, where there are,
 by even the most conservative estimates, 10 million adult alcoholics, and very few
 families that have not been touched, in one way or another, by this national scourge.
 This same scourge has, by his own admission, also touched the life of our Commander in Chief.

 Whether George W. Bush is or was an alcoholic is not the point here. I am taking him
 at his word that he stopped what he termed "heavy drinking" in 1986, at age 40.
 The point here is that, based on Bush's recent behavior, he could very well be a "dry drunk."
 Of course, he may just be an immature bully who will gladly sacrifice thousands of lives to
 get his way even against the advice of the most respected and mature members of his own party."

 California Culprits

  Click  Here

 "It will be recalled that Vice President Dick Cheney put most of the blame
  on a natural gas shortage, which he then used as an argument for opening up
  vast areas of the West (including Alaska) to oil and gas exploration.
  It's now clear that the shortages were exacerbated by some of Mr. Cheney's
  old friends in the energy business who gamed the system."

 You mean Cheney and Bush and the vulgar Pigboy lied?
 They said the liberals caused that shortage, again and again.
 But it turns out it was the insatiable greed of BIG OIL?

 I'm shocked!


"The United States is a very special country in that when we maintain
  this position of military strength that we have now, we do it in support
  of a balance of power that favours freedom..."
      -- Condi Rice

 Full Story

 When's the last time we saw any freedom in the United States?

Hey, Funnyboy!
You'll get the freedoms
we think you deserve.

  US congressional hearings on September 11:
   More evidence of provocation and cover-up

   Click  Here

 The first week of public hearings before the joint congressional committee investigating
 the September 11 terrorist attacks has been a clear demonstration of why the White House
 fought so bitterly to derail any official investigation into the events of one year ago.

 Despite the Bush administration’s stonewalling and the cowardice of the congressional Democrats,
 the current hearings have produced significant new information on US government foreknowledge
 of the terrorist attacks and its failure—or refusal—to prevent them.

 Rush wants it both ways

 One of the reasons there's nobody on the entire internet who will
 speak for the vulgar Pigboy is because his positions are indefensible,
 because he constantly changes his position on every topic under the sun.

 Yesterday, Pigboy said that Bush would never dignify Dashle with a response
 because that would just lower Bush to Daschle's level, or some such crap.

 But when Juanita Brodderick was making her wild-ass claims, Rush said,
"Clinton is so guilty, he doesn't have the courage to deny her charges."

 Since there's nobody sitting next to him saying, "You crazy bastard, that's not
 what you said a couple of years ago - you said just the opposite," so Rush
 can get away with that crap because his monkeys have no independent thought.

 Yesterday was one of those days when Rush was telling a dozen lies a minute.
 "The Democrats don't care, they don't love America, they love bin Laden more,
  they hate it when America wins, they only want to destroy," shit like that.

 Someday, when I'm 78 years old, I'll finally have BartCop Radio, and if the vulgar Pigboy
 is still around, I'll play a recording of his dozen-lies-a-minute, and I'll count them, number them,
 explain each one, give him the red-ass and prove beyond any doubt he's a lying pig.

 BartCop Radio - it's just 30 years away!

Click for more

 Don't Forget

 Saturday night, 7-10 Pacific time,
 we'll be LIVE from BartFest in the MIRC Chat Room 

 Click  Here   for instructions on how to enter
 (Allow 30 minutes for assembly)

 Suppose Bush invades Iraq,
 steals those oils fields,
 gets lucky and finds Saddam
 and then kills him...

 ...then what?

 We install the president of Exxon to be Bush's personal puppet?

 Aren't we going to have to occupy Iraq until the end of time?
 Isn't that spreading the Clinton military machine a little thin?
 Has Bush invested one dime in beefing up the military?

 Remember, they said Clinton "decimated" the military, and now the
 Unelected Fraud is going country to country starting wars.

 Has anyone in the White House thought beyond stealing that oil?

 Judas Maximus told Jon Stewart last night that the plan is to steal
 Iraq's oil, then tell the Saudi's to fuck off because we don't need them.
 Sounds like a never-ending world war, which is just what the Carlyle Group
 and the B.F.E.E. need to steal endless trillions from the Treasury.

 Last night's West Wing seemed kinda wimpy, until Charlie
 threw gang-boy against the wall and explained to him how things worked.

 It would've been a better one hour show - they could've done without
 Toby, Josh and Donna playing stooges with their bad transportation.

 And then at the end, when they explained to Bartlet that they could handle
 the cover-up of the murder of the Kumari ambassador without dragging him into it,
 and Bartlet says, "No, it was my decision and I'll take the heat."

 ha ha

 Yeah, that's just what a president would say...
 But the best part of West Wing this year will be Bartlet giving the red-ass
 to the monkey-brained GOP candidate. I hope Gore watches the show


"Never, never, never believe any war will be smooth and easy, or that anyone
  who embarks on the strange voyage can measure the tides and hurricanes
  he will encounter. The statesman who yields to war fever must realize that
  once the signal is given, he is no longer the master of policy but the slave
  of unforeseeable and uncontrollable events."
             --Winston Churchill

  Smirk!  Listen up!


 Marc Perkel is going to Las Vegas without a date.

 Like coals to Newcastle or beer to Milwaukee,
 I think Perkel will do OK in Las Vegas :)

 Bush's Iraq remarks leave Feeley furious
  Political slight requires apology, House hopeful says

  Click  Here

"Democrat Mike Feeley vowed Wednesday night to single out
"every chicken-hawk Republican running for office" if Bush doesn't
 apologize for making political remarks about the possible war on Iraq."

 This can't be right.
 Democrats don't fight back.
 They lay there and whimper...

 If this guy's for real, he's got my support

 Google Search

 I did a Google search on "Who has never seen 'Gone With the Wind?' "
 My name came up, along with 59 others.

 Spooky, ...eh?

 I mean, ...I've seen 15 minutes of 'Gone with the Wind."
 Sometimes, when Mrs. Bart was watching it, like Leo, she'd say "Watch this!"

 So,  ...I know they have a "Don't be birthin' no babies," scene,
 they have a "Blow me, you can't have Tara," scene,
 then there's the "I'm a male pig demanding sex" scene,
 there's the ultra-shocking, "Frankly, I don't give a damn" scene,
 and there's the fifth scene, the one I remember not that clearly...

 In this scene, there's two dudes who run into each other,
 and one of them is fifties Superman - George Reeves,


...and he runs up to the other southerner stand-arounds and says,

"Have you heard the great news?
  We're going to war!"

 They were as happy as the Pinhead administration about going to war.

 But war = many American funerals, ...unless Bill Clinton is president.
 How many American dead are we willing to sacrifice?

 Perhaps the White House could provide us with a graph,
 showing a price-per-barrel ratio to dead American heroes.

 Think about it - what if...?

 A gallon of gas cost $1.50, no American military dead
 A gallon of gas cost $1.75, ...we'll give you      300 dead servicemen
 A gallon of gas cost $2.25, ...we'll give you    1000 dead servicemen
 A gallon of gas cost $2.75, ...we'll give you    8000 dead servicemen
 A gallon of gas cost $3.25, ...we'll give you    3000 dead servicemen
 A gallon of gas cost $3.75, ...we'll give you    8000 dead servicemen
 A gallon of gas cost $4.25, ...we'll give you 11,000 dead servicemen
 A gallon of gas cost $5.50, ...we'll give you 16,000 dead servicemen

 The B.F.E.E. will make extra-billions of we have enough dead soldiers.
 Do you think evil men mind others dying to make then super-rich?

 Perpetual war, guaranteed by the most brainless slug in presidential history.

 So, how many dead do we want to buy?


"Sometimes in order to have peace, you must have war."
          -- Usurper, Nashville, TN., 09/24/02

The Pieman


"Are you better off now than you were two years ago?" 
       -- Al Gore

 W., the Little Corporal
  So what's driving him to try to take over the world?"

  Click  Here

 He thinks he's Napoleon!
 He's behaving exactly like a corrupt, warmongering megalomaniacal totalitarian.
 All he needs now is one hand stuffed inside a snappy red, white and blue military jacket.
 I'm kind of afraid to look in his closet.

 Send Bush a message

 Click  Here

Click for folding wooden bears!


"The administration has stated that if I had understood the context in which the
   president made those remarks -- the remarks that Senate Democrats are not
   concerned about national security -- that I probably would not have been so critical.

  Mr. President, what context is there that legitimizes an accusation of that kind?
  I don't care whether you are talking about homeland security, I don't think you can
  talk about Iraq, you can't talk about war, you can't talk about any context that justifies
  a political comment like that. This is politicization, pure and simple."
         --  Tom Daschle, taking off the pink tutu, speaking his mind

 What Clinton had raised to over 11,000...

 ...has been stolen down to less than 8000 by the Illegal Fraud.

 The media is paid to look the other way while the B.F.E.E. empties the Treasury and
 the fool Democrats are too scared to say anything cause Mr. Rove might not like it

 How did I end up in this party of gelding cry-babies?



"Not many know it but we’ve been in a drought this year in New York.
 Well what’s the big deal, not like we grow any wheat here? But because
 of the drought there is now a marijuana shortage here in New York.
 Things just keep getting worse and worse for the Mets."
    -- Dave

Woo Hoo!

Subject: Trent "Cock" Simplifies the Debate

First time writing in...

Today in the Washington Post, there was an article on Dashle's outburst over Bush's comments
on the Democrats sabotoging homeland security.  Half way through the article, Trent Lott the Cock,
gave an ultimatum, "Who's the enemy here: the president of the United States or Saddam Hussein?"

Well Trent, there are those of us that believe that we are dealing with more than one enemy in this instance.
Hah-hah, sucka.  No really, besides that, the rhetoric used by politicians to frame the issue of Iraq has been
choking an open forum for debate.  Simplifying the issue in terms of saint v. sadist dismisses all the other
elements that are vital in deciding the best course of action.  Demanding an answer from congress as to
which of the two leaders are the enemy is childish and unfair.  Really, who's going to stand up and say "Bush"?

So, if we rely on deductive reasoning in this instance, Hussein has to be the enemy, and if he's the enemy,
he therefor must be stopped.   Replaced.  Killed.  Whatever.  This rhetoric closes the forum for debate
and squashes any opposition to invasion.  One last thing, shame on the Washington Post for printing that.

Now the "credible news source" has legitimized Trent's argument as the way this issue should be framed,
and in turn killing any debate amongst it's readers. Please make sure your readers don't become vicitmized
by this simplistic, but certainly purposeful rhetorical tactic!

Sarah D.

 The Rio Speaks

 I finally heard from the staff at The Rio.
 Man, they cut things closer than Dirty Harry.

 Since we don't know which super-luxury suite we'll have,
 they said ask Guest Services, the Front Desk or the concierge.

 Be sure you tell them the  bartcop.com  party in a Masquerade Suite.
 Don't let them send you to a regular room.
 The Party of the Year will be in a Masquerade Suite.

 Support  bartcop.com
 Help us get the truth out!

 Click to become a Corona volunteer for $10 a month

 We've got to build a bigger hammer.
 The illegal President Monkey in a Man Suit needs to be stopped.

 Click  Here  to donate large.

 Vegas Stuff
 You Vegas-haters - just take it like a man - it's almost over.

 Like most things, I could've handled this better, but maybe we should have
 "touchstone" people to relay messages, coordinate transporation, inform others etc.

 For instance - Dan Klinger is staying at The Gold Coast.
 A lot of people are staying at the Gold Coast - so why should everyone
 get a separate cab to ride over to the Hard Rock for the bus ride?

 If you're at the Gold Coast, call Dan's room starting Thursday if you want news,
 or to group up for a cab, or the location of the Friday after-bus party, etc.
 If he's not there, leave a message and he'll get back to you.
 So call Dan Klinger at the Gold Coast for updates.

 Call Terry Hanna's room (Rude^Boyee in chat) at The Rio for updates, too.
 I'll bet Terry will soon know which room the Party of the Year will be in.

 We could probably use more "touchstones," maybe one for downtown
 and maybe a miscellaneous person for miscellaneous locals and stuff.

 We also need a plan for those getting in Friday AFTER the Magic Bus ride.
 Lots of West Coasters are getting in late after working Friday.
 We need a way to tell them where the after-bus party is Friday

 The fifty of us who are there Friday can't just take over some bar, but maybe we
 can swarm some bar in a casino (The Rio might make the most sense) and do
 some gambling and even have a "hospitality" room upstairs for people to meet.

me if  you  want to be a "touchstone," (that's a dumb name, I know)

 You non-touchstoners?

 It couldn't hurt to tell us where you're staying if you want to be involved in the group stuff.
 You already have my cell phone number, it wouldn't hurt for me to have yours.
 The last thing we want is to not connect after we paid to get there.

 It goes without saying that anyone who is drinking at this party can't drive.
 Cabs are cheap in Vegas, $10 will get you anywhere you need to go.
 Plus there will be people not drinking, maybe you can hitch a ride to your hotel.
 We don't want to have to organize a bail party for anybody Sunday.

 Party in Vegas this weekend

 If you haven't gotten a "entry number" from Christian,
 and an update from Bart - we need to hear from you! 
 If all else fails, ask the front desk of The Rio where the party is.

 Click  Here  for a The Last BartFest update.

 Click  Here  to see the BartFest Webcam.    It's GREAT at night!

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