...more sober than Bush
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Bart uses it because it's the best!
Quotes
"The election may be over, but the terrorist
threat is still real."
-- Pinhead, explaining
why he takes month-long vacations
Can
Bush have your kids to fight for oil?
You may not have a choice
Excerpt:
But when (the principal) insisted on an
explanation, she was in for an even bigger surprise:
The recruiters cited the No Child Left
Behind Act, President Bush's sweeping new education law
passed earlier this year. There, buried
deep within the law's 670 pages, is a provision requiring
public secondary schools to provide
military recruiters not only with access to facilities,
but also with contact information for
every student -- or face a cutoff of all federal aid.
Subject: How did Pat Buchanan Know?
The Buchanan article you
linked to was dated 11/5, and was written prior to the election.
YET there is one sentence written in the
PAST tense with respect to the outcome:
"Thus, Tuesday night should have been a blowout for the Democrats."
Should have been?
Is this just poor writing/editing or is
it a Freudian slip?
Keep fighting the good fight.
Steve
Maybe Pat got word the fix was in.
From: Podvin
Subject:yesterday's quiz
You wrote:
> His real name is Bill Bailey.
> What's his stage name?
Susan Lucci.
You are correct.
Quotes
"I have never covered a president who actually
wanted to go to war.
Bush's policy of pre-emptive war is
immoral - such a policy would legitimize Pearl Harbor.
It's as if they learned none of the
lessons from Vietnam,"
-- Helen Thomas, afraid of nobody
Click Here to read more of her speech
Bush Recession Hits McDonalds
Excerpt:
McDonald's said it would close about 175
restaurants worldwide and slash up to
600 jobs, forecasting a shortfall in 2002
earnings as it struggles to turn around its
U.S. performance and trim worldwide costs.
More buying opportunities for the super-rich backers of Bush
Subject: The Real Hell Of It All...
…is that now the O’Connor and Rhenquist
can retire, and will have
appointed the President who will now appoint
their successors.
We’re just about to get the scariest thing
I can think of,
...Chief Justice Scalia.
Jack
The Democrats were fools not to pound that message home every
day.
They'll overturn Row v Wade, Miranda, all kinds of stuff and
then
people will say, "How in the hell did
we lose our rights?"
Quotes
"You can see unbelievably rapid loosening of
environmental regulations and fundamental
restructuring or attempted restructuring
of both the tax code and the Social Security system,
and you’re going to see a PAC right-wing
federal judiciary, and you’re going to see an
administration and a Congress that
is 100 percent representative of corporate interest.
You’re going to see a diminution of
any protection for workers or anything like that.
You’re certainly going to see a huge
legislation passed and signed to limit products’
liability, defects in products and
medical malpractice. You name it. All of that is coming."
-- James Carville, in What Went Wrong
Ten ads for just $300
You can have every Wednesday, Thursday or Friday.
Weekends are half-price!
Don't wait, first come, first served.
Reach dozens with your message.
Brighten
Up, There's Always Another Election
by Molly Ivins
Excerpt:
"...the Democrats deserved to lose. What a gutless
campaign. It's one thing to point out that
the economy is a mess; it's another to
have no useful plan whatever to offer. How could they
let themselves be buffaloed by Republicans
on taxes, with all the facts and fairness on their side?
One had only to say, "Every single nickel
of tax relief in that package will stay in it, but instead
of giving 50 percent of the cut to the
richest 1 percent of Americans, we're going to put that
tax relief into a payroll tax cut, it's
going to the bottom 99 percent of the people."
Subject: Picture of Gebhardt offends me
I am not happy that you chose to portray
Gephardt in women's makeup as a way to ridicule him.
I too am disappointed in the Dem leadership
and he deserves much criticism. But are you saying
that he's as weak and cowardly, or as eager
to submit to male power as a woman?
Or perhaps you are implying that he's just
as despicable and deserving of our hatred as a transgender person.
Either way it's an implied attack against
gender that is not deserved and I don't appreciate it.
Margi M
Margi, the short answer is that - in a man-vs-woman fair fight
- the woman will almost always lose.
Unless you know of some women who could whoop Mike Tyson, or
some women who could play
lineman in the NFL, you kinda have to agree with me.
I still get flack for "he wears a pink tutu." People ask if I really hate the ballet.
Since bartcop.com is now read by dozens, there's something to offend everybody.
And if Gephardt would stand up and act like a man, and do his
damn job,
the idea for that graphic wouldn't have entered anyone's mind.
click for more
Excerpt:
Give the Republicans credit. They know
what they stand for. Tax cuts. Guns. Bombs.
Oil. Big business. Old boy networks. Privatization.
Plundering the earth.
Pillorying and padlocking the poor. Party-line
votes.
The Democrats?
One day they are for peace and justice;
the next they are a bunch of brown-nosing Republicrats.
DNA Identifies Child Victim of Titanic
Excerpt:
It has taken 90 years, the latest in DNA
technology and a television documentary to do it,
but the "Unknown Child" from the doomed
Titanic has finally been identified.
Magda Schleifer, knew her grandmother's
sister andfive sons drowned when the Titanic sank.
The family's loss became more real when
blood tests confirmed the child was Eino.
"It has been more and more a family story and
now, it's more like something really happened,"
she said, speaking through her son-in-law.
The Marijuana Initiatives
Hey, you NORML dudes - the next time you write an initiative,
call me, would you?
Why did you ask for a three ounce limit?
If they had asked for a quarter-ounce maximum, which is enough
to make ten joints, they might've agreed,
but you guys asked for "400 joints," the opponents claimed,
like you were dealing at elementary schools.
It's like beer.
Nobody is going to buy 50 cases of beer if he knows
he can buy another case tomorrow.
This was handled so poorly, I wonder if it was Democratic
strategery.
As stupid as voters are, I think if you make the maximum a few
grams, people would agree.
Sure, voters are scared, but if we appeal to their fairness...three
joints a day for a chemo patient, it would pass.
People need to listen to my advice because voters are stupid and I speak stupid - can you?
Yahoo put the wrong picture with this story.
Thanks to tpoh.org
General
Strangefriend
Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Say Newkyooler
By Ulysses S. Taxpayer
Excerpt:
And further East is North Korea, who of
late has been testing missiles
over our finest Pacific ally Japan. Now
with real nuclear bombs, they
can strike our bases in Okinawa, ensuring
another Pearl Harbor, but this
time in Japan. You can see why I am confused
here. I read that North
Korea is building missiles that will be
able to reach Alaska, even perhaps
Hawaii! Then that would really be another
Pearl Harbor, wouldn’t it?
Bring
Me the Head of Terry McAuliffe!
by Arianna Huffington
Excerpt:
Memo to Terry, Dick and Tom: That wasn't
the problem. The problem was that you failed
to have anyone out there delivering a galvanizing
message. And it's not as if there weren't
plenty of urgent issues to choose from:
the hobbling economy, the soaring deficit, corporate
corruption, the insanity of Bush's tax
cuts. Well, I guess that last one would have been kind
of hard since 12 Democratic senators had
sided with Bush on it, including those two
about-to-be-former senators, Jean Carnahan
and Max Cleland.
Guest
Editorial
by withheld
Excerpt:
Taxes seemed to be the focal point of Bush's
campaign, much like his father.
However when studying both plans in Economics
class it became obvious that
Clinton's plan was an almost perfect ramp
on rich taxes compared to poor taxes
where as Bush's plan gave the rich the
biggest tax cut in years yet actually ADDED
a tax bracket to a group of Americans so
poor that they used to not even have one.
The
Truth about Microsoft and XP
by MadSatyrist
click
Animals are more helpless than Democrats
Was it fixed from the start?
How did the election results, in almost
every case in the formerly close races, skew so wildly
from pre-11/5 predictions, and always to
the Republican side? Why is no one asking this?
All night long, NH, GA (2x), CO, FL, TX,
the alleged results seemed to have no relationship to
what pollsters had suggested we could expect.
Once or twice I understand, but all night long?
I know that GA and FL switched to the highly
suspect voting machine/black box technology -- others?
We already know They Will Do Anything (note
where I am writing from).
And on behalf of my state, I am so sorry. It makes no sense to me. We did not deliver.
Laurie in Minnesota
Nader
- American hero or spawn of Satan?
A follow up from yesterday
Betty Bowers Christmas 2002 Newsletter
Excerpt:
Praise the Lord that the GOP is so powerful
that we can ruin the economy and threaten to spill
the blood of American soldiers for no reason
other than to keep our approval rating aloft – and still win!
Need we have any more proof that our glorious
regime is a miracle? Praise!
From: withheld
Bart, your piece from yesterday would have been even more effective if you'd said:
> That's the room where Bush talked Reagan into giving missles to Islamic
Jihad.
--if only Bush had gotten
a blow job instead.
> That's the room where Reagan signed a document that funded bin Laden.
--if only Reagan had gotten
a blow job instead.
and so on...
Think
Hard
Take a careful and critical look at mass media -- and fight
back
by Jeff Koopersmith
as seen on AMPOL
Excerpt:
"...neither McAuliffe, nor any Democrat
party chief, had a chance against the New American Media
-- controlled by a handful of men, the
mandarins of mass media -- all conservative, all corporate thinkers,
and all committed (either willingly or
kicking and screaming) to news that is in reality "unfair and unbalanced,"
as is the case with Fox News prescript.
They broadcast not actual news but unrelenting propaganda
calculated to expand the power of ultra-right-wing
policy leaders..."
From: Ron Henry
Subject: Truman Quote
Among the many memorable quotes attributed to Harry Truman....
"If the voters are given a choice between a Democrat
who acts like a Republican
and a Republican they will choose the real thing
and vote for the Republican!!!!"
That might help explain the dismal showing for
the Dems Tuesday!!!!
Even so, I can't believe the people in this country
who claim to be Democrats.
...and there are more registered Democrats than
Repugs..either don't vote or they vote Repug.
Well, two more years of this crap....watch your 401's if you haven't already cashed in!!!!
Ron
You
Say "Terrorist", Washington says "Shuttup"
America’s Dangerous Chechnya Game Aided 9/11 Terrorists
Excerpt:
Buried in the middle of the June 6th Washington
Post article “Hill Probers Upgrade
Evidence Gathered From Moussaoui” was proof
that the failure to uncover the
terrorist plot was not just a matter of
poor coordination, but rather a direct result
of deliberate U.S. foreign policy.
Got
a complaint, suggestion or
something
to get off your chest?
Bush
Lies, Media Swallows
by my good friend Eric Alterman
Is
Democracy too much trouble?
by James Higdon
Excerpt:
Democrats have knelt down before an illegitimate
president hoping to blend sufficiently with
Republicans to avoid the media attacks.
That hasn't worked, and it won't. This class of the
elite is perfectly happy to have tamed
Democrats around in order for the poor, the middle class,
minorities, labor, and the elderly to feel
that there is hope in a two party system, so long as the
Democrats know their minority place.
And what we have left is a shell with no remaining parties.
We have corporate representatives, a few
valiant survivors, and many who hide in the hallways
of the capitol, hoping not to be noticed.
For the latter, a political career is all they have or know,
and when weighed against that, democracy
is just too damned much trouble.
Circus Circus blacklists Marc Perkel
What was his crime?
Stop
that man!
Quotes
"It's not what you don't know that scares me...
It's what you 'know' that just isn't
true."
-- Mondale, to Von Reagan, 1984 debate
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Subject: Paul Wellstone was a sap
Paul Wellstone was a sap to put his life
on the line for liberals, most of whom still
dwell in a happy little dreamworld where
there's no such thing as a political killing.
Hit a prominent Republican and you can be
damn sure his friends will make you pay,
but when they hit one of ours, we just
look the other way and pretend it didn't happen.
And then we whine that no one will fight
for us.
In the 1960s, our enemies gunned all our
most effective leaders. Each time, they framed a patsy
so that we could all pretend together,
like children clapping to save Tinkerbell, that another
obvious and effective political killing
was just the mad act of a lone nut.
When that charade wore thin, our enemies started staging vaguely plausible airplane accidents and suicides.
Until liberals quit playing "let's pretend"
and start looking the harsh realities of life in the face,
the vast right-wing conspiracy will keep
disposing of each and every effective truth-teller.
This is not a question of intelligence vs.
stupidity, but of a sensible adult outlook vs. a Peter Pan mentality that
still clings to happy little lies.
George W. Bush may be a bonehead, but he knows how the world works.
Until we grow up, we can never be free.
Brad
Bush promised to get bin Laden.
He vowed "to bring him to justice or bring
justice to him."
That's why his approval numbers went to the high eighties.
That was 411
days ago ...and counting
Ho, ho, ho!
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