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  In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Blasts Kill 10 in Baghdad 
O'Reilly in Sex Scandal 
Media complicit on shading
D-r-i-v-e   b-y   N-e-w-
Kerry rated M for Mature 
Bush Ignores the Facts
Thinking the unthinkable
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Bush on Osama


Quote of the Day

"He can't think of one?   I got a list."  
    --Jon Stewart, on Bush's many mistakes,


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Volume 1423 - Busch bashing

 Friday-Weekend    Oct  15-17,  2004                                                                                                                       Mike Malloy on AAR weeknights


"If any woman ever breathed a word, I'll make her pay so dearly
  that she'll wish she'd never been born.  Roger Ailes knows very
  powerful people, and this goes all the way to the top."
   -- Bill O'reilly, threatening women with Bush's influence?   Attribution

  Bush Orders Freeze on Zarqawi Network Assets
  After 37 beheadings, after 37 beheadings,  ...Bush froze his assets?

  Click  Here

 Bush has ordered a freeze on assets of that Zarqawi nut, who the CIA says
 committed a series of bombings, kidnappings and beheadings in Iraq.

 The move, which came a day after Britain ordered banks to seek out and freeze
 any assets of the group, blocks any accounts, funds and assets of Tawhid and Jihad
 in the United States.

 So, after Blair did it, Bush could no longer allow Zarqawi access to his money?
 Why has Bush allowed Zarqawi to have free flow of his money in the US all this time?

 After 37 beheadings,  ...he froze his assets?

 Remember 9-11, they waited (I'm guessing) 6 weeks to freeze Osama's assests?
 It's almost like the BFEE wanted a cut (no pun intended) of Zarqawi's assets.
 It SEEMS like Bush is working with Osama and Zarqawi.

 On Aug 6, 01, Bush received written warning that Osama was coming and did NOTHING.
 He didn't even tell the FAA to watch for trounle or keep a close eye out for hijacked planes
 On 9-11, jet fighters are ordered to stand down.
 Weeks later, Osama is said to be cornered in Bora Bora, but our troops were told to stand down.
 Rumors say (I wasn't in Afghanistan that week) Pakistani planes flew in during the stand down.
 Shortly after (my recollection) Bush froze Osama's assets.
 Why did Bush wait about 6 weeks to freeze Osama's assets in America?

 Why give the bastard a 6-week head start with his hundreds of millions of dollars?
 Then Bush pulls troops out of Afghanistan to "stop the imment threat" from Saddam.


 Then 18 months after Zarqawi is named as being responsible for killing Nick Berg,
 someone convinces Bush it might be a good idea to freeze his American assets?

"Oh Christ, ...did BartCop catch me helping them again?
  I hope my eye don't start twitchin..."



"Do I pray?   No, I don't.
  And I don't ask Santa for gifts anymore, either."
   -- Bill Maher, HBO highlights for his show

 O'Reilly, The Masturbator, Fights Sex Scandal 
  It'll be a while before we get tired of this...

 "I'll masturbate on the phone for you...!"

  Click  Here

 Hot times at Fox: A 33-year-old producer on Bill O'Reilly's show filed a steamy sex suit
 against the old pervert, and he launched a blistering offensive against her in court and on the air.

"This is the single most evil thing I have ever experienced," O'Reilly lied, branding it an extortion scheme.
"In a case like this you have to fight, even at some risk. . . . These people picked the wrong guy."

  ha ha

 Like Al Franken did?

 O'Reilly's attorney, Ronald Green, said he wants a court to make the tapes public.
"I know that he does not fear what is on the tapes,"

  ha ha

 If O'Reilly is whipping his hamster on her phone recorder, I think everybody should get to hear it.
 Before Clinton, there was a gentlemen's agreement that you could screw (or be blown) by anybody
 and the other side woulkdn't tell. But Clinton whipped them so badly, they made new rules - they
 cheated - because they couldn't stand that he beat them fair and square.



"Just use your vibrator to blow off steam.
  What, you've got a vibrator, don't you? Every girl does."
    -- Bill O'reilly, offering tips on relaxation,    Attribution

 Is Bill O'Reilly, The Masturbator, a cheating scumbag?

  Click  Here

 She says O'Reilly repeatedly pressured her to engage in phone sex and frightened her with lewd "monologues.
 Her suit quotes O'Reilly as speaking to her in highly explicit terms about vibrators, oral sex, masturbation
 and a fantasy involving a Caribbean hotel room shower - ha ha - no mention of the oven mits?

 O'Reilly, the married father of two, host's the Nazi network's most watched program. He's a foul-mouthed
 bastard and a bully unless you're bigger than him. He has become its most recognizable personality through his
 combative style and populist opinions. Last month he published "The O'Reilly Factor for Kids."

 We can't let the kids near The Masturbator, can we?   knows what a masterbator he is

 Subject: Remember Florida 2000

 Dear Bart,
 I am one of the people responsible for making final decisions about the Democratic Party's state efforts.
 Yesterday, Al Gore wrote you about the painful choices his campaign faced due to a lack of resources
 during the final weeks. It brought back some bad memories.

 In 2000, we didn't have what we needed to compete everywhere and were forced into difficult choices.
 I still believe that going for it in Florida and scaling back in Ohio was the right decision -- nonetheless it was
 a decision that we shouldn't have been forced to make. I'm convinced to this day that if the Democratic Party
 had the resources we needed during the last two weeks, George W. Bush and the Republicans would not be in office.

 Make a contribution for the entire Democratic ticket before tomorrow's deadline:

 Tonight is the deadline -- help put us over the top now.

 Thank you,
 Michael Whouley
 General Election Strategist

 Michael, why did you guys wait until October to start looking at election fraud?
 Saturday on CNN, they say Democrats are filing lawsuits to try and force several states to have
 honest elections by adding printers to the Diebold machines - 18 days before the election.

 Do you really think Diebold is going to fly 10,000 software experts to 10,000 precincts  to
 rewrite the code on 50,000 machines in the next 11 working days?

 Do you people not own a calendar?
 Have you lost your desire to win?
 If so, why wait until now to tell us?
 Why weren't these suits filed in December of 2000?

 Don't you think you're about 200 weeks late filing these lawsuits?
 How in the wide, wide world of sports did this election "sneak up on you?"

 Even still, there's a chance we'll win, in spite of our suicidal tendencies.


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 Media complicit on political truth-shading
     by  Gene Lyons

  Click  Here

 Dick Cheney accused Edwards of being a no-show in the U.S. Senate.
"The first time I ever met you was when you walked on the stage tonight."

 It was a palpable hit, ...except that it was not true. Cheney presided over the
 Senate exactly twice in four years. Within an hour of the vice president's
 statement, photos of Cheney and Edwards together at a Washington
 prayer breakfast were all over the Internet.

 So the press, which flayed Al Gore for getting the cost of his dog's arthritis
 medication wrong in 2000, was all over Cheney, right? Not quite.

 Why wasn't it a big deal? Two reasons: The VP debate got shunted aside
 in favor of the upcoming presidential encounter, and the media hesitate
 to offend vengeful Republicans, but don't fear Democrats.

 Were truer words ever spoken?
 Nobody is afraid of the Democrats because the world knows they are geldings.
 Democrats simply refuse to fight, so bullies of all types beat them up daily.

 It's the same reasons muggers pick on old ladies and not linebackers.

 ...and no, I won't run the dancing, pink tutu senators picture this time.


I saw this on

 Blasts Kill 10 in Baghdad's Green Zone
  We can't even control the inside of the Green Zone?

  Click  Here

 Insurgents penetrated our military's heavily fortified Green Zone and detonated explosives Thursday,
 killing 10 people, including four American civilians.  A top Iraqi official said the attacks appeared to
 have been suicide bombings. The attack was a bold assault on the heart leadership of the country
 and a district known as a relatively safe haven for Americans stuck in Bush's personal quagmire.

 The attack raised fears over security in the compound and underscored militants' ability to strike
 our military as they are carrying out a new offensive to suppress them in other parts of Iraq.

 Remember Lebanon in 1983?

 The military geniuses couldn't guess that truck bombs might be used?
 They didn't think to put up barracades until after 241 men died?

 Now, 21 years later, they can't guess maybe a fence would keep these guys out?
 Maybe we should hire Israel to build us a security wall?

 Can't they afford metal detectors at the Green Zone Gate?
 Can't they afford bomb-sniffing dogs?
 Did every fucking dollar have to go to Halliburton?

 Months ago, the GOP was bragging about "all the experience we're getting with
 urban warfare and occupation security," so why aren't they using any of that?

 I'll bet the security to see Fahernheit 9-11 is tighter than the Green Zone Gate.


"I fear, really, that we are doomed on some level here. We are so close to
  not being able to pull it back, to turn it around -- to get control of our country
  back in our hands. We have allowed the wealthy to take control now of all our
  democratic process. It may be too late -- I don't know, I hope it isn't."
     --Michael Moore, who sounds like he's been reading  from 30 days ago   Attribution

 Subject: Republicans cheat

 The Republican National Committee (RNC) has hired firms to register voters who are
 destroying the applications of Democrats registering to vote. Because of Republican
 cheating, Democrats will need to win elections by a large margin to actually take office.

 So even if some polls are showing that people are tired of failure and excuses and are
 ready to change the direction of America from failure to success - we still need to
 redouble our efforts to compensate for Republican voter fraud.

 They already stole one election. Let's make sure they don't steal this one.

I'm Marc Perkel - And I approved this message!

Marc Perkel
San Francisco, CA

"War begins with Dubya" Chinaco Cup in the BartCop Store

Get one for the office.
It's a conversation starter.

Click  to  Order


"Telling someone you will seek legal redress unless they are
  willing to pay a certain cost is not within the extortion statues
  as long as you have a  plausible basis for your legal claims.
  Fox is being so aggressive it suggests that Fox and O'Reilly
  are quite worried about this lawsuit."
    -- Stephen Gillers, expert on legal ethics at New York University Law School,
        suggesting The Masturbator has some rough waters ahead    Attribution

"I do it with both hands..."

 Bush Ignores the Facts With Good Reason
    by Joe Conason

  Click  Here

 When George W. Bush speaks, the listener is often left guessing whether the President
 of the United States intends to deceive or is merely ignorant of basic facts. Either is always
 possible, since Mr. Bush is as capable of deception as any politician, and more indolent than
 many whenever "hard work" is required.

 ...the Duelfer report proves that Iraq was in no sense a "gathering threat" to us - as the President
 continues to insist in his stump speeches. The Iraqi regime's diminished power presented a problem
 not nearly as grave as those posed by North Korea, Iran and Al Qaeda.

 After last year's invasion, those who had publicly doubted the firm assurances of the President and
 his cabinet about Saddam's possession or imminent acquisition of nuclear, chemical and biological
 weapons were told to wait patiently for inspections to be completed. The White House couldn't wait
 another eight weeks for the U.N. inspections to conclude, but asked the world to withhold judgment
 for 18 months on its preemptive attack.


Bush vs Gary Busey

ha ha
I can't stop laughing...

 What Kerry should've said in the last debate
  This article rated (M) for Mature - no children of Freep types

  Click  Here

"Bob, let me begin by saying that what you are asking is a stupid goddamned question that only has
 meaning if you've been busy wolfing down chowder from Karl Rove's boner. And don't you smirk
 at me, you Bush bitch, you little corporate whore, so painted red by pharmaceutical companies,
 with your little slit mini-skirt and no panties, ready for Merck or Exxon/Mobil or Carlyle to negotiate
 a price for your sweet policy pussy. I'll come over to your fuckin' podium and force feed you a bowl
 of mercury emissions and we'll watch you twitch and dance, motherfucker, dance as that toxic shit
 eats away your fuckin' brain man, makin' you seem like more of a retard than ever


 Thinking the unthinkable

  Click  Here

"Who died for Saddam? Would one of those who died, if he or she had lived, have found
 a cure for cancer, composed a symphony, wrote a novel or great poetry,fathered a family,
 been chosen parent of the year, served friends and neighbors throughout the long and happy
 life he or she hoped to have, expected?

 The greatest threat to civilization is not weapons of mass destruction in the hands of terrorists,
 but hubristic politicial and religious zealots claiming their God is on their side, bent on having
 what they want, no matter what the cost."


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The hottest babes are for Kerry-Edwards


"One day he's going to get a knock on his door and life as he's known it will change forever.
  Ailes knows very powerful people and this goes all the way to the top...Top of the country."
     --Bill O'Reilly, describing the future murder of Al Franken,     Attribution

 Mortgages rates down
  Rates drop as the economy flunders

  Click  Here

 Oil prices soar still higher
 ...but the U.S. data show crude supplies up

  Click  Here

 Prince Harry's teacher: taped his confession
  Who cares?    Bill O'Reilly whipped his puppy into a recorder!

  Click  Here

 GAO: US unprepared to handle election fraud
  Can't blame the Democrats - they had no idea we'd have elections in 2004

  Click  Here

Jon Stewart,
Kitty Kelley,
Chain of Command
Fahrenheit 9-11
Bush family Fortunes

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Marty's Entertainment Page

 Trip report

 Thursday: Just got back from Ted Drewes Frozen Custard


 If I didn't see it myself, I might not've believed it.
 People were lines up twelve deep to buy Ted Drewes Frozen Custard.

 It's 45 degrees, raining and the wind is blowing like Ann Slanders at NaziCon 2004!
 and people are lined up OUTSIDE to buy Ted Drewes Frozen Custard.

 I got a hot fudge sundae and the fudge was boiling on the custard - swear to Koresh.
 It feels odd to be standing in the cold and order a frozen treat and when they hand it
 to you it's hot and you wonder for a second if it's too hot to hold. Then you look down
 and see the hot fudge bubbling like it's flowing out of Mount St Helens.

 Oh, on their window, they have a sign that says, "Our concretes are a Cardinal sin."
 This town is so baseball crazy.  Just driving around, you see Cardinal banners on houses,
 even moreso than you'd see in a high-spirited college town. Even McDonalds is selling
 Big Mac's for a buck the day after the team wins.  That'll cost them some money.

 Tonight (Thursday) they play Game Two - in the cold, 45-degree rain with gusty winds?

 Cardinals reign on Houston, on to Enron Field.

 It's 6 PM CST Friday.
 We just finished the wedding, and the BIG Catholic bachhanal starts in an hour,
 (I'm going to try to get into some trouble with Dave and Freddie)
 but I just had to knock out an issue for you, ...the Reader.

 As you know, doing this page is hard work - everybody knows that...


 Call and response Quotes

"I sent my budget man to the Congress, and he says,
  here is how we are going to reduce the deficit in half by five years."
    --Dubya,  trying to make sense     Attribution

"Bush says he 'sent up my budget man' to Congress. A whiff of
  the lord of the manor sending one of his workers off on another task..."
    --Katharine Q. Seelye, NYWTimes,       Attribution

 Subject: RFK tribute


 Thanks for the little tribute to Bobby Kennedy you ran in Volume 1422.
 I believe that he would have become our greatest president ever.

 Some day our side will turn the tide.
 Maybe it starts on November 2, 2004.

 I've volunteered to drive seniors to vote in Madison, Wisconsin (swing state) on election day.
 So after I vote in Chicago, I'm heading north for the day. I hope all your readers will remember
 our fallen heroes and do a little extra this time. We owe it to those who have gone before us.

 Let's make Bobby, Martin, Medgar, John and all the rest PROUD.


 Tim shot of Chinaco for your extra efforts



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 Subject: Volume 1421 - Perfectly legal

 Hey Bart,

 I've been a big fan these last four years. This issue by far
 was the best issue I've ever read, and I've read just about all of them.

 Your call to arms, your eloquent goading, force readers to think soberly
 about what's happening in our country. You are a sane and brave person -
 I greatly respect that.

 Thanks for the provocative entertainment. It's the best.

Bush's American soldier body count in Iraq

  1059, 1075, 1086, 1092,  dead American soldiers.

6 more dead since yesterday?

28,275 amputees, wounded, injured or mentally ill
and he's running for re-election?

 Bill O'Reilly Factors in Lawsuit
  Fox's top gabber is also a grabber - of himself

  Click  Here

"There comes a time when enough's enough," O'Reilly blustered on his Nazi show Wednesday.
"So I had to file a lawsuit against 9my old grilfriend) or she will 'punish' me and Fox News.

 ha ha
 Is there tape of her punishing you, Bill?

"I really can't say anything else. I don't want to waste your time with this. The justice system has the case.
We'll see what happens. But in the end, you should know this is all about hurting me and the Fox News Channel.
"It's a shame we have to live in a country where this happens, but got to go through it."

 This comes from the soulless bastard who got super-rich with the Monica story.
 The entire FOX News Network was born to scream "pervert" at Clinton.


Call the

You have two minutes to record your message.

 Bush 'Not Concerned' About Bin Laden in '02
  Media calls Bush on one of his lies - but why?

  Click  Here

 In one of the testiest moments of the evening, Bush protested, "I don't think I ever said
 I'm not worried about Osama bin Laden. That's kind of one of those exaggerations."

 But during a March 13, 2002 news conference,Bush said something close to what Kerry quoted.
"I truly am not that concerned about him," the president said, according to the White House transcript.

 Who gave the media permnission to act like they were free again??
 Why, after all these years, do they mention the truth about their owner's lies?
 After twelve years of...


  ...what would cause them to suddenly tell the real story - using accurate quotes and real facts?

 This is bizarre and puzzling.
 Anyone have any idea how this could have happened?



 From: John

 Subject: Vacation

 Bart, you wrote:

>"Dude, I'm not going anywhere.
>  At the worst, I'll be every other day for ten days or so.
>  If something happens, I'm right on top of it."

 How much thought or work does it take to call republicans nazis, curse, and spout rhetoric?
 You could go on vacation permanently and the content of your site wouldn't change one iota,
 just assign it to any of the bloggers in your forums.

 I hope you don't think you're performing any more of a service than cheer leading for rabid liberals.
 John H

 John, first let me say I respect your service, even if you've been used as an unwitting pawn.
 I sincerely hope you're wife doesn't become a widow for Bush/Halliburton greed.

 As far as writing this page every day ,'s hard work - everybody knows that.

 Doing the radio show on top of a 12-hour day?  It's harrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrd.'s hard work - everybody knows that.

 Doing the page and the radio show and driving 370 miles is harrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrd.'s hard work - everybody knows that.

 But it's important that I stay resolute and not send mixed messages.

 Kicking ditto-monkey ass?
 That's easy - easy as falling off a Segway.

 BTW, would you or a friend or a group of friends care to straighten me out?
 If you (or anyone in your division) would care to tango in a live chat room debate,
 my respect for the military would prevent any serious harm from coming to you/them.

 Stay safe, and come home safely so we can argue Hillary's election in 2008.

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 Read the Previous Issue

 It had  everything.

 Copyright © 2004,

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I haven't heard this 'road' show.
Let's hope it's a good one.

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