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  In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Offensive Launched in Iraq 
Chads and Participles
Is Marijuana Medicine? 
D-r-i-v-e   b-y   N-e-w-
NRA Opens office in Wisconsin 
The GOP's 'Murder JFK' Game
Absolute Power Erupts
U2 Takes New York by Truck
Not Quite Monkey Mail


Quote of the Day

"War will never cease until babies come 
   into the world with larger cerebrums 
   and smaller adreanal glands
      --  H. L. Mencken

Support PO Box 54466 , Tulsa, OK 74155PayPal to

Volume 1447 - A Private Little War

Note: is not affiliated

  Tuesday    Nov 23,  2004                                                                                                                           Mike Malloy on AAR weeknights


"The unemployment rate is going up in Ohio. The new numbers are out
  and Ohio had more people out of work in October than any other state."
      --WTOL News, Toledo, Attribution

 Ohio, did you really vote for that Monkey and his fewer jobs program?
 Did you really vote to give your paychecks to the super-rich?
 Did you really give up health care so tobacco lawyers could buy another Beemer?

 Or did you get screwed like the rest of us?

 Massive Offensive Launched in Iraq's 'triangle of death'
  That doesn't sound good no matter what the outcome

  Click  Here

 Some 5,000 U.S. Marines, British troops and Iraqi commandos launched a new offensive
 Tuesday aimed at clearing a swath of insurgent hotbeds south of Baghdad, the U.S. military said.

 The region has become known as a "triangle of death" for the numerous attacks by Sunni Muslim
 insurgents and criminal gangs on Shiites, Westerners and members of the Iraqi security services.
 It would be the third major military offensive against insurgents since the massive Fallujah operation,
 which has claimed the lives of more than 50 U.S. soldiers and injured more than 400.

 Will the ongoing deaths in Iraq be a factor in the 2008 campaign, too?
 Will the Democrat have the courage to make that an issue?



 Hanging Chads and Hanging Participles
   by Keith Olbermann

  Click  Here

 ...the lead Kerry lawyer on the ground in Ohio, Daniel Hoffheimer, was more cautionary.
"What they meant to say is that the Kerry/Edwards campaign will be putting witnesses in the
 Boards of Elections if a recount is asked for We are not requesting a recount."

 At this point, the words are being that carefully chosen and, evidently, debated. So don't think
 when John Kerry said in his web-exclusive statement and video Friday that "Regardless of the
 outcome of this election, once all the votes are counted " he wasn't being deliberately vague.
 Similarly nuanced were the words of the Ohio Democratic chair, Mr. White: "  As Kerry stated
 in his concession speech in Boston, we do not necessarily expect the results of the election to change "

 I think Keith is telling us what we already know...
 That Kerry is a quitter who's not fighting the election results in the least.


 Subject: membership


 Last year I became a member with a basic $10 subscription.
 After the election I felt like a needed to up my contribution, so I signed up for a $17 membership.
 I sent you an email asking to cancle the $10 membership, and you wrote back saying that I needed
 to cancel both memberships and then restart the $17 one.

 But after listening to show 59 I've decided, fuck it, Bartcop is the only voice of sanity on in the US politics.
 I need to keep both memberships open and consider getting a third one.  I gave Kerry and the dems $500
 for the election and I really regret it.

 Wish I had spent the money on Bartcop CDs and express mailed them
 to Kerry's campaign manager, Mary Beth Cahill.


 Tim, thanks for that.

 Is Marijuana a Medicine?
   an exclusive by Medical Barbie, often seen in BartCop Chat

  Click  Here

 Figure 3 is a possible explanation of why sometimes smoking pot gets you high and sometimes it makes you feel stoned.
 THC is thought to induce euphoria and creativity, otherwise known as a "head buzz."  CBN gives you a "body buzz"
 or feeling of calmness and pain relief.  CBN can be a powerful component of the beneficial effect of marijuana, even
 though it is often present at much lower concentrations compared to THC.  CBD has very little psychoactive effect,
 although it might help with some diseases.


 Subject: sideshow and voting

 Dear Bart.

 Two things:
 First of all, I have a new address at a new site:
 Secondly, I've written up some of the stuff about voting, at

 I found that link you claimed not to understand quite useful.
 (You can just ignore all the tables and graphs and read the Finding in plain English.)

The Last Liberal Outlaw,
by former prisoner Mike Palecek

Published by New Leaf Books of Chicago


"George W. Bush was set to do the annual presidential turkey pardon today,
   but they had to cancel it. The turkey had already resigned."
     -- Dave

 5 Killed in Hunting Dispute in Wisconsin
   Lone nut  w/semiautomatic assault rifle kills 5, 6 armed men, wounds 3, 2

  Click  Here

 As several deer hunters made their way through the woods of northern Wisconsin, they were startled
 to come upon a stranger in their tree stand. Asked to leave, the trespasser, wearing blaze-orange and
 carrying a semiautomatic assault rifle, opened fire on the hunters and didn't stop until his 20-round clip
 was empty, leaving five people dead and three wounded, authorities said.

 The shooter was eventually captured.

 This is the difference between owning guns and being a gun nut.
 The shooter was able to take down 8 armed men with his assault rifle.

 Thanks to the GOP and the gutless democrats, he could legally carry that weapon.


Attached is a jpg showing the famous Bartcop sticker on
THE highest display of the thousands on the fences at the annual close
the School of the Americas march at Ft. Benning GA. (
Over 16,000 attended this year, the largest crowd ever.

Another jpg shows the founder of the event, Fr. Roy
Bourgeois, and my wife holding the same display before
it gets deposted high on the fence.

4 more years of hammering.
Guy H - McAllen, TX

 Subject:  Taking you up on the MNF Friendly Argument

 When I saw the Desperate Housewives skit, I really didn't think anything of it.
 I certainly didn't forsee it becoming this huge blown up deal that it is, being compared
 with the Janet Jackson thing. It's really reflective of how our culture is moving to the right.

 When you get down to it, all we saw was Nicolette Sheridan's bare back. Whereas two
 years ago, you could tune into NYPD Blue on ABC on any given week and see someone's
 bare ass, and no one thought anything of it. You're right in pointing out that it's unnecessary,
 but how many of the commercials and promos we're bombarded with everyday are necessary?

 If I had a son who watched the game in question with me, and I had to choose between him
 seeing Nicolette Sheridan's bare back, or seeing one of the many other commercials and asking me
 "Daddy, what's erectile dysfunction?" or "Daddy, what do they mean by feminine itch and odor?"
 ...i'd definitely go with the woman's back.


 I didn't see the skit, just the still shots.
 Most of all, it just seemed pointless.


 New Video Game Recreates JFK Murder
  See how quickly YOU can murder the Democrat!

  Click  Here

 Traffic Games said the objective was for a player to fire three shots at Kennedy's motorcade
 from Oswald's digital perch in the Texas School Book Depository. Points are awarded based
 on how quickly and accurately you can murder the Democratic President.

 Shooting Kennedy in the right spots in the right sequence adds to the score, while "errors" like
 shooting Jackie Kennedy lead to deductions.  Each shot can be replayed in slow motion, and
 the bullets can be tracked as they travel and pass through head. Players can choose the "blood effects"
 option and giggle with glee as the Republicans change history right before our eyes.

 The way I remember it, the top shooter at the FBI couldn't fire Oswald's bolt-action rifle as
 fast as our never-lies government said Oswald did, plus ...Oswald had to take the time to aim.
 So any assertion that this is "instructive" or "historical" is just a horseshit excuse for them to market
 a video game that lets conservatives celebrate one of their biggest mile markers.

 BTW - would it be as funny to the GOP if a Republican was in the game instead of JFK?


Used by permission - please visit

 Subject:  over the top


 I've been reading you for quite some time now, contributed a bit (put "Monster" back
 at the top, will 'ya) and in general share you around, but The Special Olympics poster
 mid-point in your last issue (22 Nov MMIV) was just a little over the top. While King George
 is certainly challenged, these kids have more faith, heart and integrity than just about anyone out there.

 No point in closing the barn door, it's all Fascist now.
 Keep swingin' that hammer,


 Tom, I knew I'd catch hell for that. No matter what gets published,
 someone has a problem with it, so lately I'm just feeding the paranoids.

 Baseball's Expos to become 'Nationals'
  If they name teams after local flavor, why not the Washington Handjobs?

  Click  Here

 Robin Quivers gets TV Deal
   Stern's sidekick gets a talk show with Sony

  Click  Here

 Toy Safety Warnings Issued for Holidays
  Don't buy the 'Bag O' Glass' for your two year old

  Click  Here

The best books by the best authors

 Subject: who is the genius behind Weakly World News?

 hey bartcop,

 love your site, read it every morning.
 The absolute best part are the brilliant Weakly World News graphics.
 Who makes them and where can I find an archive of them online?



 Noah, those are done by a dude named Chris who's on a motorcycle touring Asia.
 One day he's in Singapore, the next in Bejing, the next in Bali - he rides fast as hell!
 He does great work.  As far as an online archive - I'll check into it


  Click  Here   for the latest update

 November 23, 1944

 The German 7th Army launches a series of limited attacks against the US 9th Army
 in the Roer River Valley as resistance to the south stiffens against the US 1st Army.
 To the south, the US 7th Army reaches Strasbourg.

 Red Army advances in Hungary and Czechoslovakia continue as Cop and Tokay are captured.

 The Canadian parliament ordered 16,000 draftees to replace losses in their armies in Europe.
 To this time, only volunteers were sent overseas.

 A shot of Chinaco for Dave...  and his Herculean efforts to encapsulate
 the entirety of World War II, our first, but not last, fight against belligerent fascism.



"Two third-party presidential candidates filed a lawsuit to force an Ohio recount.  Bush led Kerry
  by 136,000 votes in the unofficial count when Kerry conceded like a Democrat.  Kerry supporters
  claim there were voting irregularities in Ohio, but Kerry couldn't be bothered."
      -- Candidates Seek Ohio Recount     Attribution

 Absolute Power Erupts
  by Maureen the seductive sex kitten

   Click  Here

 The Republican Visigoths are crushing checks and balances and driving Democrats (and moderate Republicans)
 into subservient, obedient roles, sticking antiabortion provisions into major spending bills. Even the suggestion that
 Congress has an advise-and-consent role on judges caused the Visigoths to slap Arlen Specter into stocks, until he
 whimpered he would do their bidding.

 The party of moral values deemed that crime pays, shielding Tom DeLay with a rule that someone facing a
 felony charge can still be a leader.  The ultracreepy Mr. DeLay de-pantsed Democrats on Friday, sneering:
"I understand the Democrat Party's adjustment to their national minority status is frustrating, but their crushing defeat
 ... should show them that the American people are tired of the politics of personal destruction."

 Well, yeah. Watching Bush supporters shred a war hero into a war criminal was tiring.


 Subject:  not-yet-verified rumor

 NYC Restaurant Refuses to Serve Bush Twins

 Freemans, tuesday night the 16th of nov. the bush twins ,
 along with 2 massive secret service men, tried to have dinner.

 they were told by the maitre'd that they were full and would be
 for the next 4 years. upon hearing, the entire restaurant cheered
 and did a round of shots... it was amazing!!!



Marty's Entertainment Page

 Subscription Drive

With Bush's victory (?) you'll need  to stay sane.

   Why not subscribe, and we'll go thru this together?
   (Students, teachers, military and AARP only pay $5)

Bonus  Pay for a one-year subscription ($100)
  and get the last three shows on CD delivered to your door!
  They'll play anywhere - in your computer, in your car, in your home CD player.

Double Bonus  Subscribe now and get membership privileges until January, 2006


  Click  Here  to subscribe instantly

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  Or send a check with your e-mail address to:
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  Tulsa, OK  74155


  The elected Dems are scared little pink tutu bunnies.
  If we don't stay on Bush's crooked ass - nobody will.

 Subject: that new NRA office in Wisconsin

 The "incident" in Wisconsin blows to hell the NRA's argument that when people are armed
 they can better defend themselves. Everybody involved in this was armed. It's just the other guy
 had a fucking semi-auto crappy Chinese AK-47 wannabe.machine gun.
 So now all the deer hunters will want one "just in case".

 Who the F hunts with a SKS or AK-47?

 I bet if you check the guy with the SKS his dink will be about 3 inches.
 The smaller the dink the bigger the gun. That's the rule.

 And to the families of the dead. I am sorry for your loss.
 But aren't you glad we have that glorious second amendment?
 At least your lost loved ones had a chance.
 That should be of some comfort.

 Steven B



  Click  Here  to get the latest BartCop Radio Shows
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 U.S. Death Toll in Iraq for Nov. Tops 100
   America trusted Bush and he's killing them for personal profit

   Click  Here

 Three Marines who were wounded in Fallujah later died, raising the death toll in Iraq for
 November to at least 101. The Marines have suffered most of the Fallujah battle casualties.

 How does Bush get 3/4 of the military vote?
 Why would a man rather die for Halliburton than come home to his wife and kids?


Bush's American soldier body count in Iraq

  1215, 1217, 1224, 1227,  dead American soldiers.

They only got 3 since Saturday,
so we should thank our wise and fearless leader?


 A blow job happened on Clinton's "peace and prosperity" watch, and the media and the GOP
 spent over $100 million on a witch hunt inside his zipper to try to drive this "bad president" from office.

 9-11 and Iraq happened on Bush's "war and death" watch, (over 4,000 dead) and not only
 did the media forgive him, they pushed for his re-election and they labeled him a "good president."

 Lesson learned: Having sex is worse than 4,000 people dying for no damn reason.

 Subject: there you go again

 Your page is an up/down  up/down  up/down  ride....

 Kerry is a Loser/Coward
 Election was Stolen

 Kerry is a Loser/Coward
 Election was Stolen

 Kerry is a Loser/Coward
 Election was Stolen

 Would you please decide on one or the other, Bart?

 Wayne, I fail to understand why you can't get past this.
 Did the Cardinals lose the World Series due to bad pitching or cold batting?

 Gee, could the answer be ...both?

 At some point, you'll understand what everyone else got the first time.
 Let's make that sooner, rather than every day from now on, OK?

Call the

You have two minutes to record your message.

 Subject:  Bad MNF herb

 Hiya Bart,

 Longtime reader from back in the RL-LNW days and still love the page.
 Keep swingin' the hammer against Idiot Shrub's Insane Klown Posse and neo-christian apocalypse seekers, bruddah.

 In a world where I can't watch the broadcast evening news without tampon, Viagara and Cialis commercials played
 every ten minutes, followed by an evening's fare of chainsaw massacres, torture, murder, and psychotic killer programs,
 I find it hard to isolate this little piece of playful nudity run before Monday Night Football for criticism.  Since when is
 showing a naked female body any worse than pushing instant woody pills or graphic violence?  In my book it isn't.
 We as a culture seem to reject the former and blindly accept the latter, and there is something seriously demented in this.

 I spent almost a decade in Europe at a time when television was nationalized in most countries, i.e. the state ran the
 programming on every channel.  Racey scenes involving the naked human body were commonplace in both shows
 and commercials, but graphic violence was heavily censored on both TV and the print media.  As a result, I believe
 most Europeans have a far more normal relationship to human sexuality, as well as being less accepting of raw violence
 and brutal behavior than are most Americans.

 As far as I'm concerned we as a country need to be far more worried about the prime time airing of Freddy Kruger
 does Minneapolis or the proliferation of boner-pill commercials than we should be about a silly booty intro into
 Monday Night Football.  I, for one, would rather my kids see Nicolette Sheridan's naked backside jumping on
 Terrell Owens in a skit than some wriggling dame on a sofa talking about how her man gets the quality wood
 he seeks popping some tent-pitching meds in between scenes from Silence of the Lambs.

 I guess my bottom line is, if we are gonna bitch about what's on broadcast TV,
 then lets bitch about what is truly harmful and distasteful.

 Show me the error of my reasoning?

 Brotholla, I have no problem with your reasoning.
 My point, was that it was about as relevant as another tribute to Saint Reagan.
 And why do it when the FCC is looking to punish broadcasters just for spite?



This Christmas, instead of spending $20 each on
nieces & nephews who won't even appreciate it,
why not spend $10 each on them and send the rest
to St Jude's?

Catching something fatal as a kid's gotta suck.

 Subject: that MNF towel scene

 I'm wasn't offended by this ad, although I don't get the purpose of it.
 What's the point?
 That T.O. cares more about women than football? and that's supposed to advertise football?


 The outrage about the raciness of the scene is thinly disguised rascism.
 The big black rich and talented stud running off with the beautiful white woman and the poor
 impotent coach potato white man realizing there isn't a damn thing he can do about it.

 IMO a funnier scenario would've had Sheridan dropping her towel and T.O. taking no notice of her
 nakedness, instead he pulls a sharpie out of his sock and autographs the towell and hands it back to her.
 That would've been funny, but then there would be talk that T.O. must be Gay or something
 for not running off with the beautiful white woman.

 Pat M.


 Dan Rather Resigns 'CBS Evening News' Post
  All those years and he goes out with a monster gaffe

  Click  Here

 He made no mention of one of the biggest gaffes in journalism history - the National Guard story that
 forever gave the Monkey a pass on going AWOL during wartime. Rather claimed he worked a deal
 with CBS executives last summer to leave after the Nov. 2 election, but other sources say he was fired
 after anchoring the "60 Minutes" story that made Bush a war hero in the eyes of the extra-stupid.

 So, like David Brinkley, Rather leaves with less credibility than
 Dan, was it worth it?
 You put your reputation in the pot and said "I'm all in," when you didn't have the cards.
 Are you,, ...stupid or something?

 If it wasn't for bin Laden, you and Jim Hatfield would've been Bush's top political allies.
 How does that feel, Dan, knowing you let the drunken deserter off the hook in the eyes of history?



"In 2002, I was an on-air commentator at MSNBC, and also senior producer on the "Donahue" show,
  the most-watched program on the channel. In the last months of the program, before it was terminated
  on the eve of the Iraq war, we were ordered by management that every time we booked an antiwar guest,
  we had to book 2 pro-war guests. If we booked two guests on the left, we had to book 3 on the right.
  At one meeting, a producer suggested booking Michael Moore and was told that she would need to book
  3 right-wingers for balance. I considered suggesting Noam Chomsky as a guest, but our studio couldn't
  accommodate the 86 right-wingers we would have needed for balance."
        --Jeff Cohen,  Attribution

 U2 Take New Album to NY Streets on Flatbed Truck


  Click  Here

 Bono brought traffic to a standstill in New York on Monday,  blasting out songs
 from U2's latest album as the band cruised down Broadway on a flatbed truck.



 Not quite Monkey Mail

 Subject: You are an idiot

 You said this, regarding McClellan's comments regarding what happened in Chile..

> "The president is someone who tends to delegate but every now and then he's a hands-on kind of guy."

> Bullshit.
> Bush delegates the thinking stuff because he has no brain.
> Stupidly, he got in a physical fight with a group of people because he's not able to control himself.
> The Monkey is a 9-year old boy who needs a babysitter at all times.

 Those are not babysitters.

 I never said they were.

 Those are men trained to protect the president at all times.


 They are not there for show.

 What point is it that you're not making?

 I am a Democrat, I voted for Kerry.  Even though I do not like Bush's politics, he is the
 president and deserves to have his secret service agents around him, when he feels the need.

 You misunderstood my comment.
 What I meant was, "Where was Condi, his babysitter?"
 Bush needs someone he considers an adult around him at all times so they can say,
 "Stop that George," when his temper boils over and he throws one of his hissy fits.
 My comments had nothing to do with his safety or the Secret Service.

 Obviously a red flag should have been flown the moment they had the doors shut on them.
 Granted, the Chileans may not have known who they were, but should we really call Bush stupid
 for helping out the guys who are suppose to protect him?

 Sure, we should call Bush stupid every time he does something stupid, as in this case.
 And we should also call you stupid for suggesting Earth's director should get into a fist fight
 when he's surrounded by the best-trained, best-equipt, non-Jewish bodyguards on the planet.
 Why do you think America's president (sic) should join a brawl?

 You would have called Clinton brave and daring for stepping in between that pushing and shoving.

 Predicting the future?
 Is that your strong suit?

 I realize you do not have much respect for president Bush,

 That's true, and I love your lower case "president" - good touch.

 but at least do not fault him for wanting his protection around him at all times.

 As always, Bush failed to do his job.

 His job is not to jump in some NBA-style fracas if he sees a whif of trouble.
 His job is to stay alive and healthy so he can lead America and the world.
 Were you snorting Cuervo when you wrote this?

 Especially entering an enviroment in which people disagree with him.

 I'm suggesting he remain safe.
 You're the guy calling for him to engage in hand-to-hand combat.

 Any thought I had for donating money to you, or becoming a member has gone away with that.

 I see - so you intended to subscribe, but fortunately, you waited long enough - until you had
 a chance to misinterpret something I wrote that gave you an excuse not to support the site.
 I can take you not subscribing, but stop pretending you were on the verge of doing it
 until you misread that harmless sentence.

 Some advice: Next time you introduce yourself with a personal slur, be sure you know
 what the hell you're talking about or you might end up looking,, ...stupid or something.

 Christmas Shopping online?


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 Copyright © 2004,

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BCR Show #59
There's Got to Be a Morning After

Click  Here  to listen to Part 1 of  Show 59
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35 minutes of reflections on what might have been, 2004

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21 minutes on the big winners and big losers on Nov 2

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19 minutes on Catholic Math, Bart's Law #3 and Stupid People

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37 minutes Tommy & Bart digesting the election with a look towards the future

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