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Wed  Aug 24,  2005     Vol. 1607 - Monkey Bungler


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Power of Nightmares

In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Iraq Mission Mutated
Govt by Dirty Tricks
Pat Robertson is nuts
Sheehan and Sting
On vacation, out of touch
Tombtones = Bush ads
Eric Rudolf a Freeper? 
Embedded over her head
Hillary Duff's new teeth


 Quote of the Day

"I have no doubt that Senator Clinton
  would make a great president."

     -- John McCain, TIME whore magazine   

   John, I agree, but speaking the truth
    just cost you the '08 GOP primaries.
    You need to read   Bart's Laws.   



When was the last time you
listened to Mike Malloy on AAR?

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  will see your banner


"What do you say when 1,872 Americans have died to depose a dictator only to replace him
with an Islamic republic where clerics get the final say on the rights of women? If you're Bush,
you simply say it isn't so because Condoleezza Rice said so."

    --Tom Grieve at  salon.com


 Our Mission in Iraq has Mutated
   So has Bush - he gets more stupid every day


Bush and his aggressively incompetent collection of business-suited bunglers paid to think up some kind
of mission are running out of any ideasd that have even the slightest connection to reason or reality.
That's why, exposed by tough, smart, bereaved mother Cindy Sheehan, they retreat to the Bush-bunker
and speak to their base -- the greed-crazed tax haters, Christian ayatollahs, racists, gun worshippers and
innocent but deluded souls who got Bush appointed in the first place. Those gangs of hardcore devotees
who can't for the life of them spot any Bush mistakes are the folks Lincoln talked about when he said
you can fool some of the people all of the time."

That's a great point.
What else can Bush do when he's in this much trouble but to play to his base
of thirty percent of the people who can't see that anything is wrong?

Will his base be able to see anything wrong when 5,000 soldiers have died?  Or 10,000?
If only America had a free press.
If only America knew what the rest of the world was saying about us.

As long as Bush the Bungler is making decisons things can only get worse.



"I talked to Condi, and there is not -- as I understand it, the way the constitution is written
is that women have got rights, inherent rights recognized in the constitution, and that the
constitution talks about not "the religion," but "a religion." Twenty-five percent of the
assembly is going to be women, which is a -- is embedded in the constitution."

-- Der Monkey, explaining how the Islamic country he's creating will treat women   Link


 Pat Robertson: Screw God's Commandments
  "Chavez has oil, why pretend this is about freedom?"

.. Link

Pat Robertson says America should assassinate Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez to stop
his country from becoming "a launching pad for communist infiltration and Muslim extremism."

"We have the ability to take him out, and I think the time has come that we exercise that ability,"
Robertson said Monday on his religious hate show.

"We don't need another $200 billion war to get rid of one, you know, strong-arm dictator," he whined.
"It's a whole lot easier to have some of the covert operatives do the job and then get it over with."

I think this is Pat Robertson's last hurrah.
If Republicans had any decency (should I finish this sentence?) they would
shun this crazy bastard for fear of being linked to him and his crazy-ass ideas.

But then again - isn't Robertson just saying what Bush thinks?

In Bush's pretend world of make believe, worse means better.
Which medal will Bush award his crazy old friend?


 Government by Dirty Tricks
  They say Bush is a dirty, lying rat bastard

He showed pathological lying habits and was in denial when challenged on his prejudices and biases.
He would even deny saying something he just said 30 seconds ago. He was famous for that. . . .

Students who challenged and embarrassed Bush in class would then become the subject of a whispering
campaign by him, Tsurumi said. “In class, he couldn’t challenge them. But after class, he sometimes came
up to me in the hallway and started bad-mouthing those students who had challenged him. He would
complain that someone was drinking too much. It was innuendo and lies. So that’s how I knew, behind
his smile and his smirk, that he was a very insecure, cunning and vengeful guy.

This past week when George W. Bush stood on the lawn of his ranch in Crawford, he declared
that he supported Cindy Sheehan’s constitutional right to her strong opinion against the war in Iraq.
"This is America," he said. And the minute he was on the record as backing her First Amendment rights,

his attack dogs went after her.


Subject: jury awards


You're falling into the McDonald's trap, when it comes to big time jury awards.
It's easy to make the case that trial lawyers need to be cut off at the knees by saying
"some old lady got millions for spilling coffee on her lap!" - turns out, McDonalds
WAS the bad guy, and the jury was pretty much right.

I don't know a bunch about the Russell Crowe case, but our legal system works
pretty well. You rant about the Bushies trying to take over, yet you are on their side
on one of their key issues - reigning in the trial lawyers?

Tony G

Tony, I don't look at an issue and ask, "How is a Democrat supposed to think on this?"
I look at an issue, make up my mind, and if the Dems disagree I ask them to explain themselves.

BTW, I agree about the McDonald's lady.
That very old lady had to have surgery for her injuries and McDonald's was negligent.
But in Crowe's case, we're talking about $15M for a scratch.

If a scratch is $15M, should a broken finger cost Crowe $100M?
Should a scratch cost Bill Gates $5 Billion?


Please visit  MagneticBumperStickers.biz


"When Clinton was president, 
  coffers were full and coffins were empty..."  

             --Pete    www.thinkingorsitting.blogspot.com


 Subject: Cindy

I fear for cindy's life.

Everytime someone speaks strongly against the right-wing they are "dealt with".
John Kennedy, Robert Kennedy, Martin Luther King Jr., etc.

Iif the smear tactics don't bring cindy down, the right-wingnuts have proven
that they are sick enough to commit murder.

is anyone providing security for her?
--scott in st. louis

Scott, you have it all wrong.
Evil men wouldn't kill innocent people just to steal $120M a day.


Subject: Iraq's oil

So does anyone KNOW what is happening to the oil money in Iraq?
I mean really KNOW?

No, just asking the question means you're with Osama.

Is there paperwork to see?  Bank records?

Iraq is "too dangerous" to have accountants.
And the oil wells don't have meters to reveal how much they're pumping but we know Iraq was
pumping 2M barrels a day before Halliburton took over with new, ultra-modern equipment.

Why do you think Bush sent too few troops to stabilize the country?
Why do you think they failed to secure the borders?
Why do you think they failed to guard 4,000 tons of explosives?

There must be SOME public record somewhere of an accounting.
Just saying it's going in Dubya's pocket is not enough.

You seem to be halfway there.
You can't imagine that millions of barrels are being pumped each day with
no accountability - at all - but is there any evidence my theory is wrong?

Two million barrels a day for over a thousand days.
You tell me where those hundreds of billions of dollars went.

Every week or so, Bush's good puppy media reports the pipelines have been
"blown up by the evildoers."      They don't know this - they're all huddled in the
big Baghdad hotels so they take Bush's word for it that little, if any, oil is flowing.

Also who is doing the auditing of the money being spent in Iraq?
Can I see some numbers?

No, you can't.
What are you, a sleep cell for Al Qaeda?
How dare you question our Dear Leader, Godly Bush?

I saw where Ted Kennedy wrote a column about the US paying to revitalize Iraq
( which I am totally against)

How can you be against that?
America bombed them into the Stone Age.
We did that to them for no reason.
How can we not pay for what Bush destroyed?

... and I want to know what the oil money is doing for the People of Iraq.

J, Bush sold this war under the premise that it was so oil-rich, the revenue
would pay our costs - but no reporter dares to ask what happened to that.

Chaos puts $130M in Bush's pocket every day.
They can't make any money with peace.


 Cindy Sheehan and Sting


The other night I was listening to Sting's song "They Dance Alone," and I came to a new and profound
understanding of Cindy Sheehan's protest in Crawford, Texas.

"Leaving aside the politics of the Iraq war itself for another time, I see Sheehan as expressing the excruciating
anguish women have suffered since men first started going off to war. Uninvolved and powerless in the decision
to go to war in the first place, we have to live with its consequences on a very personal level and for the rest of
our lives. For us, it's not a matter of abstract principle or even whether the conflict is just; instead for us it's a
permanent unbearable void. And so, like the women before her, including the women in Sting's song, Cindy
Sheehan is carrying on a time-honored tradition of doing everything she can to make sure her son is not
forgotten and that more lives are not lost in vain."sh



saw it on  t-shirthumor.com

 On vacation and out of touch


Bush is a man who cares about fitness — this is good. When a bum knee forced him to stop running,
he could've done what most 50-something men with bum knees do: limit their recreational pursuits to
synchronized channel-surfing. Bush burned calories on the 10-speed instead. But nobody wants to hear
about his impressive pulse rate and body-fat percentages when American boys and girls are dying overseas,
and when lawmakers start throwing around the dreaded V-word - Vietnam - in the daily dialogue on Iraq."

When Der Monkey seized power, they said he was very conscious not to makr the same mistakes
his father made, which is probably a big reason he went after Saddam - to tidy up his daddy's loose ends.

So why are they bungling this vacation so badly?

Some people say the pictures of Bush the Smarter vacationing off Kennebunkport in his Miami Vice boat
while saying, "Recession?  What rescession?" is a big reason his ass got kick so hard by Bill Clinton, and now
Der Monkey is sitting in Crawford, sipping lemonade while pushing soldiers into a meat grinder for no reason.

Is Karl Rove really a genius?
Or does he just look good when the Democrat lays down?




"My orgasm is the most important thing in the world to me.
  My orgasm should be the least most important thing in the world to you." 
-- Dennis Miller, before he turned Nazi whore 

Isn't that the real problem with all things sex related?
Sex education, the gay rights issue, Janet Jackson's breast and so on?

Sexually repressed losers are so hung up on their problems,
they make other people's sexual matters their problem, too.
What ever happened to "Mind your own f-ing business?"

If we could somehow get the hard-assed Republicans laid,
maybe they'd f-ing relax and let sleeping dogs lie...  


  Gravestones have Bush ads
  The bastards are running ads for their war at Arlington




Nearly all Arlington National Cemetery gravestones for troops killed in Iraq or Afghanistan are inscribed
with the slogan-like operation names the Pentagon selected to promote public support for the conflicts.

Some families of fallen soldiers and Marines are shocked to discover their loved one's headstones have been
engraved with "Operation Enduring Freedom" or "Operation Iraqi Freedom," so Bush can pretend they died
for some noble cause.

"I was a little taken aback," Robert McCaffrey said, describing his reaction when he first saw the ads
on the tombstone of his son, patrick. "They certainly didn't ask my wife; they didn't ask me."
He said Patrick's widow told him she had not been asked either.

"In one way, I feel it's taking advantage to a small degree," McCaffrey said.
"Patrick did not want to be there, that is a definite fact."

I'll bet Patrick didn't want to die or advertise for Bush's bloody quagmire.
That marker should say, "He died so the BFEE could steal billions."

These bastards are sicker than I ever imagined.


Subject: Al Franken & Katherine Lanpher

Bart - what's wrong with Katherine Lampere???

She's always reprimanding Al Franken - is she from the other side????
I don't get it.

Love you Bart


Laura, Katherine is on our side.
Franken uses her very effectively as a comedy tool.

Here's how it works:
Al will say, "Bush has spent more money than all presidents combined
incuding the eight years of big-spending Bill Clinton.. He's the only president to give a
tax break during a war ...and he's served time for manslaughter..."

Then Katherine will jump in and say, "That's not true!"

That gives all the freedom to say anything and he often does.
She's Al's Robin Quivers - the voice of sanity (or a mother figure) in crazy Al's sand box.


Random thought...

The Rolling Stones didn't play "Sweet Neo-Con" at their first show in Boston.

Was that a favor to Musclehead and his $100,000 pioneers?

Or does lending predator Ameriquest approve the song list?


Subject: Iraq

They must really be enjoying their freedom over there.

Steve C


I'll bet they enjoyed Saddam's tyranny more than Bush's "freedom."



Subject: Cindy

Oh, hey, yeah, I didn't tell you I just got back from there!
Crawford is only four hours away from Houston, and I stayed two nights.

Camped at the second site, Camp Casey 2.
I worked my ass off and even directed traffic when Joan Baez was doing her set.
Ha ha what a life!

M Babs
from bartcop chat

Babs, you rock!

The hit counter says most readers have never been to bartcop chat

That's surprising because it's hard to imagine that someone who liked the page
wouldn't like a live chat room where dozens of like-minded, sane people gathered.

It's like a Bartfest with no cover.

ha ha

But seriously - you need to drop in bartcop chat   for a few minutes.

Nobody will bother you - because they can't see you.
They'll see your screen name, but you won't be attacked.

You've got nothing to lose.


is a

...and the BFEE makes a

at it.

Join the tens of thousands
on September 24
Who Will Call for Impeachment
Gather at the White House at 12 noon

BIG Protest March

Sept 24

We're having some signs made.

         Those are our "Worst president ever" signs

Click  Here  to sign up to carry a sign

Click  Here  to donate to the sign fund

So far, we have $1527 in the sign fund.
Do you have any extra cash?

It's not tax deductable, but
think of the money you'll lose
if those bastards win again.


 Subject: donation

Here is something for the sign fund.
Wish I could do more. Wish I could be there.

Keep doing what you are doing.
You keep me sane.

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Subject: Why won't they support Cindy?

I admire what Ms. Sheehan and the other gold star families are doing in Texas.
But do the Democratic leaders?

I have not heard one single word from any Dems to defend her against all the
slanderous things the right wing spin meisters have said about her.
Not Kerry, Edwards, Reid, Boxer, Dean, none of them, save Conyers.

So that makes me think that maybe they don't give a damn about her.
Conyers has a set, no others do. Conyers for President!

Maxine Wayers has lent support, too.
The House Dems have a pair, the senate Dems ...not so much.


 Last night on TV

One of the great, dumb movies of all time:

Red Dawn (1984) Colorado teens fight back
after Soviets drop into town for World War III.

This is the movie where the Ruskies land in Alaska and Mexico, then theyr force their way
 thru Texas and the two hundred million guns Texans own to meet their buddies in Colorado.

Yeah, that could happen.
Texas has 200 million guns and yes, you read that right.


 Subject: Diebold hires whore Democrat

Hi Bart,

This does not surprise me because the country spoke in the last presidential election: The Corporation rules!

A country which defines itself as, "Overwhelmingly Christian" has fallen on its knees to worship the golden calf
- the same calf that Moses found the people worshiping when he came down from the mountain with the
10 Commandments under his arm.

I am disgusted with all politicians.
For the first time in my 66 years, I am ashamed to define myself as an American.
I feel powerless - and it sucks: 1950 has returned like gangbusters.
As ever,

SP, hang on.
I still think a Republican will save us.


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Subject: hotties

Personally, I'd like to see a few more pictures of hotties.

I have political stickers on my car and 3 custom shirts that're emblazoned
with the message "WMD search team", but I also have a hula dancer
glued to my dashboard, to constantly remind me of what's important in life.

Your pics of Jenny and Shirley are psychic and spiritual release valves
from the steam generated by the stories of presidential perfidy.

Keep the format.

For the new readers - at Thanksgiving, you don't just eat turkey.

A turkey dinner would be just great, but it would be so much better with mashed potatoes,
Grandma's stuffing, super-tasty gravy, melt-in-your-mouth dinner rolls, cornbread, that super
Mac & Cheese that Mom makes, and some cranberry chuncks to top it all off for desert.

The smiling girls are creme de mint after the meal.

How can you get upset when your host asks, "Creme de mint?"


Marty's Entertainment Page

Marty is on Erin Hart's show  on KIRO
Sunday nights at 9pm Pacific


 Subject: Carlyle is Bush's payoff to Blair

Bart --

British commentators have been remarking for years about Blair's constant whining that he is not
personally rich enough, and that he would like someday to have a whole bunch of money.
The Carlyle post is the payoff that Bush promised to Blair to get him to back Bush's rape of Iraq.

The corporations that are benefiting from the Bush war will give Bush the same payoff(s)
as soon as he's out of office.

They're all a bunch of criminal, murdering, greedhead whores, who'll do anything, or kill anyone, for money.

Salem, Oregon

Jack, I can understand greed, but killing 1900 soldiers to do it?
That takes a heartless Republican bastard.

How does America ignore the obvious?


Call the

...as heard on BCR 80

Put your 2-minute rant on the next radio show.
BCR is listened to by dozens, so get your comments out there.

You have two minutes to record your message.

 Embedded over her head


Judith Miller didn't make anything up, she just relayed whatever her anonymous sources told her
-- nearly all of which turned out to be lies. In this way, Miller and other reporters like her can pretend
to follow the letter of journalistic protocol while flouting its spirit and purpose. What she should have done
was challenge her sources and then stop protecting them when she found out their information was false.

Poor Steno Jude - a willing dupe for the criminal administration ...and what did it get her?


 Subject: Pat Robertson

After listening to Pat Robertson openly advocating assassination I'm not sure who scares
me more, him, or the one million Christian followers he has that think the way he does.

This is why we Realists find Christians scary. We are watching to see if the Christian
community comes out against this or continues to remain silent. The way I read the Bible,
advocating to murder is wrong. Is this some sort of Christian fatwa?

Marc Perkel
San Francisco, CA.


 Today's oil theft total

 2,000,000 barrels of unmetered stolen Irqi oil,

 times today's oil price which is $65.71 a barrel  
$131,400,000 George Bush stole just today

...while he is "hard at work."

Thanks to Bruce Yurgil

Republicans and religio-crazies
say losing thousands of soldiers in
Bush's bloody war is acceptable.


1863 yesterday
1873 today


Subject:  Joe Andrew and Diebold

I'm so ashamed that Joe Andrew did this.
No wonder we can't win any freaking elections.
Do you see Republicans going to work for Michael Moore or MoveOn.org?

Hell no.
When did the Dems in this country lose their way?


Bill, I think I know exactly when they lose their way - the summer of 1994.
The Republicans said if Bill and Hillary found a way to provide every American with health insurance,
that would be "socialism," and the yellow cowards agreed 100 percent and lost congress as a result.

I'm not smart enough to know what "health care" costs, but I'll get the $00 billion
that Bush spent stealing Iraq's oil would probably pay for it.


Click Here to Search Bartcop

 Hillary Duff's new teeth
  Bush fan gets some giant new teefers



Did Hilary find NASA's missing heat shields?
I thought Martha Raye's dentures got buried with the rest of her.

Dr. Sands replaced Duff's teeth with an array of drive-in movie screens.


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