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Wednesday  Oct 12, 2005    Volume 1635 -  Scottie Underbear 

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Power of Nightmares


In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Bush's Terrifying Speech
Getler on the WaHoPo
How gay is David Dreier? 
Miers poops in public? 
Poll: Impeach bastard 
Random Thought...
Catholics Gone Wild
BFEE to rape America 
Mischa Barton footlong


 Quote of the Day

"You are the best governor ever
   - deserving of great respect!" 
     -- Harriet Miers, gushing praise on the 
         dumbest monkey ever in 1997   Link

  This is why Bush needs her on the Ho Court, 
  so she can vote to bury the evidence. 


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"The Whore Street Journal and Bloomberg are working on stories 
that point to Dick Cheney as the target of the Plame investigation." 
      --The Huffington Post,   Link

If only there was a God in Heaven....
During the Nixon demise, the first casualty was Spiro Agnew 
Cheney is an orange jump suit would make a good graphic, just in case :) 

But no, they're not going to frog-march Cheney anywhere
How can I be so sure? 
God would never let something that cool happen.. 
God's more of a "the evildoers are never caught and
only the good die young" kind of deity. 


Bush's Terrifying Terror Speech
  by Robert Parry at  consortiumnews.com


George W. Bush's Oct. 6 speech demanding "complete victory" in the "war on terror"
unnerved some Americans who saw a president who looked and sounded like an
obsessed sea captain charting the ship of state into an endless storm.

To allay some of those worries, we are offering the White House a draft for a follow-up
speech in which Bush can speak straight to the concerns of his doubters. Like another
draft that we proposed last summer, we don't expect this one will get very far.

"My fellow Americans, I hear that many of you who watched my speech the other day
came away a little spooked. Some of you thought I sounded crazy because I made it
seem like we'd be at war in the Middle East forever.

"Some even wondered what it means to win a 'complete victory' over 'terror?'
After all, 'terror' is an emotion or a tactic, so how do you defeat an emotion or a tactic?

"Some historians also note that terror has been part of war for eons. It's even in the Bible,
with one tribe's army slaughtering the civilians of another tribe. So how do you completely
win a 'war on terror' even if you fight for decades?

Consortium news.com  is the most important site on the internets. 


Getler on the WaHoPo and war


There is no bigger story than war. And a war whose major premise -- the threat from
Iraqi weapons of mass destruction -- turned out to be unsupported is an even bigger story.
That the administration presented this threat to the public with such a strong, yet false,
sense of certainty -- including the imagery of mushroom clouds -- is an even more important
lesson for all of us about big but not well-examined decisions..."Since the war began, many
other questions have been raised about other prewar assessments. But the key question for
journalists is how the process of vetting the main prewar rationale for sending Americans
into a war took place, or failed to take place.

The "left-wing" Washington Whore Post and the "left-wing" New York Whore Times 
wanted this was at least as much as FOX News and Clear Channel. 

How fucking dare they pretend they're "independent" news organizations. 
They are whores for Bush and sane people can't deny that any longer. 

America no longer has a free press - just money-grubbing whores who pretend and we'll know 
I'm wrong the day somebody asks, "How many times has Bush been convicted of a felony?"


saw it on  bartholoviews.com


"And what this man who grew up in wealth and privilege considers good for poor 
Muslims is that they become killers and suicide bombers. He assures them that
is the road to paradise - though he never offers to go along for the ride." 
      --Dubya, who grew up in wealth and privilege, telling our soldiers to "stay the course on"    Link


How gay is David Dreier?


Poor David Dreier. He spent sooooo many years hiding his gay life from the radical right
and just a few years after he attains the Chairmanship of the powerful House Rules Committee
-- the youngest person ever to do so, and perhaps the first gay man -- is now: BUSTED!

Kitty Kelley's book on the Bush clan, The Family shows that the President's mommy was not
as sharp as some might have thought. On page 491 Barbara Bush laments that her daughter's
"relationship" with David Dreier is not going anywhere. Ms. Kelley, who is always proven right in
the end, quotes Bar as saying that Dreier "Never laid a hand on her."

ha ha

Hmmmm... David "dated" Bo Derek too and that seemed to fizzle out. The real question on the
minds of insiders in Washington is how did Dreier's Chief of Staff, Brad Smith, feel about all of this?

I don't know the proper etiquette on outing gay people.
It's OK if the gay person is a right-wing, self-loathing hypocrite?

Plus, according to this web site, half of Bush's lil' army is gay, including Scottie the Liar.. 

 "I'm Jeffie's lil' underbear..."

Hey Scottie, how did Jeff Gannon get a White House press pass with a fake name? 


Click  Here

Subject: Glock 'n Spiel

Bart, bART, bart,

For all your fine justifications, it is at least 100 times more likely that your Glock
will kill either you or Mrs. Bart, than that you will experience a home invasion.

That may be the wildest statement ever published at  bartcop.com
What would possess you to compose such a sentence?

Sure, if we had kids, or, ...say I drank a lot, ...or had a temper, that might
be a problem for some households but it's not a problem at Casa de Bart

This is just a reminder that you shouldn't let your growing fame (and the women
that will attract) go to your head.   I'll bet Mrs. Bart is a damn fine shot!

Rude John

John, so far, attracting too many women hasn't been a problem :)


I saw it, did you see it?

Randi Rhodes "debated" right-wing loon Janet Parshall on C-Span. 
I started feeling bad for Parshall right away. 
It was worse than Montecore vs Roy. 
There was blood everywhere
On the walls, on the ceiling... 

Here's a bloodless video clip

Look for the extra-bloody parts in BCR 84.


"They gonna love that fat boy in prison." 
        --Don Imus, who loved Bush more than anybody, on Karl Rove,   Link

Imus, stay on their side - we don't want you on ours.

When I hear Randi, Jon Stewart and Mike Malloy, I want to throw away my microphone. 
When I hear Imus babbling, I feel like the King of Radio. 


Does Harriet Miers poop in public?
  I wouldn't make up something that gross


The letters offer a rare glimpse into the mutual admiration that sprung up between Miers and
Bush after they began working together on Bush's first campaign for Texas governor in 1994.

Bush responded to her birthday wish in kind, and included a humorous, if baffling, postscript.

"I appreciate your friendship and candor. Never hold back your sage advice," he wrote.
"P.S. No more public scatology."

Whether Bush was referring to Miers' rough-and-tumble time as chairwoman of the
Texas Lottery Commission or something else isn't clear. Scatology refers to "the study of
or preoccupation with excrement or obscenity," according to Webster's dictionary.

Is that what we need on the Supreme Court?  "Public scatology?"
Is that what we need in the White House? 

Bush makes Clarence "Slappy" White's harrassment of Professor Hill seem tame. 


Subject: from a fellow gun owner, Jimmy the lawyer


Gangs of armed rapists breaking into everyone's houses is a bit over hyped.
I'm your age, and in my entire life I've never experienced a home break-in.
My father is 85 and he's never in his life experienced a home break in.

I admit a home invasion isn't likely but think about a few things.
Is it likely that a beloved football legend would try to cut his wife's head off?
Is it likely that a president would be impeached for having a girlfriend?
Is it likely that the stupidest man in history would be president - twice?
Is it likely that the law would cease to exist in a major city like New Orleans?
How likely is it that an American city would be the victim of a terrorist act?

However, my father was accidentally shot in the leg by his brother with a .22 rifle.
He could have just as easily been shot in the head.  So there's my statistic.

Let's get one thing crystal clear - I'm not calling you a liar on the .22 rifle affair,
but the odds have to be one-in-ten-trillion unless you're hunting. There's no reason
to clean a gun with other people around, and there's certainly no way in hell I would
ever horseplay with a firearm or let someone into my house who might do that.

Guns aren't like tigers, where sooner-or-later it's going to attack you.

Over 85 years, two generations have experienced no home break-ins, with one
family member shot by another family member.  In fact, none of my uncles were
shot in WWII, where they all served, and only one family member was ever shot,
and that by a fellow family member.  So there you have it, Bart.  Real life stats.

Before you ever experience a home break in, you're more than likely going
to shoot your foot· or your wife.

Jimmy under the Golden Gate

I'm sure it's no surprise that I disagree. 

After that was written, I called Jimmy the lawyer for more info. 
He said his father and uncle were "looking at a gun."
He said his uncle "didn't realize the gun was loaded,"
and he "pointed it in his father's direction"  and pulled the trigger.
(The black bold words are mine.) 

So he kinda proves my point. 
You have to take those four steps to injure someone. 

Lastly (that's not a promise) when Bush outlaws the Constitution and we have civil war 
in the streets of America, (assuming there's something for which a Democrat will fight) 
I don't want to be the only lefty with a gun.  I'm going to need some help. 



"Bush feels that God has asked him to invade Iraq. I don't know what else 
God has told him. We may be one of the countries invaded if God whispers, 
'Please, Bush -- invade Malaysia'." 
    -- Former Malaysian PM Mahathir Mohamad,    Link


Subject: sane gun talk

I'm not a gun owner, nor am I a fan of guns. Still, I think a person has a right
to arm himself or herself if the need to do so is felt.

So far, so good.

But I'm curious what your opinion is on Michael Moore's theory set out in Bowling for Columbine,
that as a nation we have a lot of  private gun ownership because we're basically afraid of what could
happen (your example of glass breaking in the night), and that the  fear is perpetuated by corporations
who want to sell us stuff  (security systems, deodorants, mouthwashes, etc. lest our homes be broken
into or someone think we have body odor or bad breath). It  seems to me there's a lot of merit to that
theory, and so I wonder if  you've had a situation arise where someone has tried to break in, or perhaps
you live in a tough part of town. I know cops carry guns because they have to deal with a lot of tough
customers.  But does the average person have the same risks? (I don't know--just  posing the question.)

That theory, as you've described it, doesn't do much for me.
It seems to assume the crime reports we hear on the news are fake.

I've had false alarms at BartCop Manor, where the alarm went off because a bird flew into a window that
had a glass breaker alarm, causing me to search the house with the gun in my hand. I remember being damn
nervous, but thankful as hell that I had more than a stick in my hands. (Think Godfather on network TV :)
Then there was that time in a cheap-ass Dallas motel where we had a close encounter.

Of course, one good reason to have a gun is if you feel people might  be coming after you--and if I did
as good a job as you do at shining  a spotlight on the BFEE's evil ways, I'd be worried too.

Keep swinging the hammer, Bart--you keep a lot of us sane during the  week.

I got to thinking about Jimmy the Lawyer's letter, saying he knew people who'd been shot 
but he never knew anyone who's home was invaded. Because I sold insurance as a finance man, 
I knew one guy in all my life whose house burned down. Does that mean there's no reason to 
carry insurance on your home?  Because your house burning down is not very likely to happen? 

And if you're going to protect your house, why not protect your family? 
You can always get another house. 

Homage to my gun-hating friends:
Of course, gun laws work,  ...in countries with fewer than 200 million guns. 


Random Thought...

I wonder - is Bush's point man on Bird Flu another "Brownie?" 

Too bad we have a crooked president who will risk other people's lives if 
he thinks he can steal a few oilfields or repay a favor to an old crony. 


Click to Order


 Subject: donation

Bart, here's something to help make The Big Hammer hit a bit harder.
As a grad student my finances are a little too chaotic for a subscription, however.
So I'll toss in what I can when I can.  Keep up the good work!


WPE stickers!    Free with any donation 

Plus two bartcop.com ovals and "I Miss Clinton" bonus sticker. 
Four stickers for one donation!

(If you don't miss Clinton, tell me and I'll leave that sticker out.) 

You can donate with PayPal...or  snail mail.

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You gotta do this

Go to Google  type in the word  failure  then press "I'm feeling lucky."

ha ha

Trap your fascist friends with it, too. 


bartcop.com sticker in Orange, Texas 

Send in your sticker pictures!

If we print your sticker picture 
we'll give you  30 Days  of BartCop Radio

Bush bullies hiding  bartcop.com  from you?

Surf anonymously
by entering bartcop.com   HERE

Make him stop


Full disclosure requires us to reveal that this quote is recycled: We used it at the beginning of
an editorial in 1999. Mr. Barrett had been in business then for four years, had spent $10 million
-- and had elicited a guilty plea from Mr. Cisneros to a single misdemeanor charge of making
false statements to the FBI about payments to a former mistress. Mr. Cisneros paid a $10,000 fine.
In the six years since, Mr. Barrett has spent almost $12 million more, for a grand total of close
to $22 million. "We're wrapping it up," Mr. Barrett said in March 2003, after the special court
that oversees independent counsels said he should cease "all investigative and prosecutorial
activities." He filed his final report in August 2004.

What is it with these "less government" sex police?
Do they enjoy staying years inside Cisneros's zipper like they did Clinton?


Subject: BCR # 83

Hi Bart,

Show 83 was a great $hrubya beat down. 
Maybe he could think better if he rubbed his two brain cells together. 
Tally was in fine form also.

Is it the green tea, or the blue agave?


It's the agave :) 



"Both these men could be pulled up as war criminals for engaging 
  in actions that we condemned Germany in 1946 for doing. " 
       --Scott Ritter, comparing Bush and Blair to Nazi war criminals   Link

 Scott, be careful - with this bunch, telling the truth can be bad for your health. 


Subject: Pakistan aid faster than New Orleans

I'm happy that we can give aid to the people in Pakistan.

But I can't help but to wonder if we brought in the heavy lift helicopters dropping food and water
and getting evacuees out like we did there how many more lives could have been saved in New Orleans.

Too bad we can't bring in the same resources for America that we do overseas.

Marc Perkel
San Francisco, CA



bartcop.com  has been recommended for an award from The Academy of Digital Video Arts. 

I didn't know my digital video art was that good. 


Get six CDs (the last three shows) delivered for just $24.

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"Throughout the U2 tour, politicians from both sides have been organizing fundraisers
at the venues or around specific shows. Neither Debt AIDS Trade Africa or Bono are
involved in these and they cannot be controlled. The U2 concerts are categorically not
fundraisers for any politician - they are rock concerts for U2 fans.'
     -- statement from u2.com, squashing those wacky Rick Santorum rumors   Link


 Bush's Brain

  Click  Here

  ha ha

 Thanks to Eric Z 


Subject: bartcop.com - internet icon?

It's official - you're an internet icon.  Seriously.

According to this 'Link Popularity Tool' -

"A site that has a Link Popularity Score of 1,000-5,000 is considered average.
A site with a Link Popularity Score of 20,000 is considered popular.
Sites with a Link Popularity Score above 100,000 are Internet "Icons". "

You're over 500,000.  Definite icon-status.

BTW, Howard Dean is on Letterman Wednesday.

Hmmm, icon-status feels a lot like pre-icon-status.
Thanks for sending that.


If you had a motorcycle 
and did business with Dr Neon
it might look like this. 

How hip is Dr. Neon? 
His dot com is  glowjob.com

Poll: Impeach the bastard if he lied about Iraq
      If he lied?


By 50% to 44%, Americans want Congress to consider impeaching Bush if he lied about Iraq,
according to a new poll commissioned by AfterDowningStreet.org, a grassroots coalition that
supports a Congressional investigation of President Bush's decision to invade Iraq in 2003.

The poll was conducted by Ipsos Public Affairs, the highly-regarded non-partisan polling company.
The poll interviewed 1,001 U.S. adults on October 6-9.

The poll found that 50% agreed with the statement:

"If President Bush did not tell the truth about his reasons for going to war with Iraq,
Congress should consider holding him accountable by impeaching him."



Subject: broke-ass Dems...


I've loved you for a long time.
I once contributed and hope to do so again one day.

Can those of us who got enough money to afford broadband and little else,
at least get some access to the older episodes of your show?

I'd send you ten bucks but my ex screwed up my paypal account with some ebay crap,
as soon as I get it figured out, I'll send you ten dollars, but only for a wpe sticker,
which probably wont go over well here in the only part of Wisconsin that is Delusional.
(West burbs of Milwaukee)

I'd still get a kick out of show 50, but can't afford show 90.
How about some archives on the older shows?
You never know, might make some people subscribe to the newer shows.
And if they do I want commision.

ha ha
Dude, that's a great idea.

Keep the hammer swinging, but remember us poor fuckers.
Paul in Pewaukee

Dude, I seriously remember those who can't afford.
Eich Bin Ein Fucking Broke.

OK, we'll open up the olders shows first.
This is BCR at it's worst.
I started as bas as one could get and without any clues.

Click  Here to listen to Part One of  BCR Show 23, the first with Tommy producing. 
Click  Here to download Part One of  BCR Show 23

Remember, lower your expectations and assume later shows get better. 


Subject: everybody hates this war?

What would the polls say if liberal traitors had not begun an anti-American, anti-war campaign 
along with their confederates, the mass media which hates freedom and democracy? 

Dude, you remember funny.
The American media was all for this war, just like Clear Channel and FOX News.

Ever heard of Judith Miller, the lady who just got out of jail?
She was all, "Let's have a fun little war" for The New York Times, a paper that hounded Clinton 
and gives Bush a pass on every disaster that happens to us..  The Washington Post was all, 
"Saddam has WMDS!" again and again and again. NBC fired Martin Sheen for saying it was a 
senseless war, even tho he was right.  The Dixie Chicks almost had to leave show business.

You remember funny.

The mass media gets its news directly from al Jazeera just like BBC News, 
The Guardian and other pro-red publications and news outlets. 

No, they're following orders from the White House.
Don't you remember, "Watch what you say?" from Ari Fliesher?
The BBC and The Guardian are out of Bush's reach, that's why they're different! 

BTW, can YOU tell me how many times Bush has been arrested?
No, you can't, but I'll bet you can name 10 women they claim were with Clinton.

You remember funny.

(Without the pro-red publications) 75% support for the war in Iraq. 
85% approval rating for President Bush, a truly great President.

Ron White

Ron, if war and bankruptcy and 2,000 dead soldiers in Iraq makes Bush a great president, 
what do you say about Clinton, who tripled the stock market, paid down Reagan's debt 
and never sent a man into battle who didn't come home alive? 

By the way - "anti-war" means fewer dead soldiers. 
Why are you against that? 


 Bartcop.com  flashback   (back when we were funny) 
   Volume 173 - Hammer of the Gods    March 3, 2000

Cock Fight!

I saw something in the paper about a cockfighting bill in the US Senate.
Sen. Wayne Allard (R-Colorado) proposed a bill that would make it illegal
to transport your cock across state lines to participate in a cockfight.

That made me wonder about cockfighting ettiquette.

Let's say two men, ....Oh, I don't know, ....I'll just pick two names out of a hat.
Let's say Rush and Slappy each have a cock, and they decide to attend a cockfight.

So what happens when they get to the cock fight, and Rush gets a little thirsty?
While Rush goes to get them each a beer, does Slappy hold his cock ?
It seems only right to help a friend out.

Then later, when they need more beer, Slappy returns the favor and offers to
go stand in line for two more beers if Rush will hold his cock.

You see, it's important that somebody holds their cocks for them,
because if you aren't careful, somebody might try to steal your cock.
What would Rush or Slappy do then?
These good Republicans may be slow to anger,
but when you steal a man's cock, you're asking for trouble!

But it just seems like it would be a friendly thing to do, for Rush
and Slappy to hold each other's cocks if the situation called for it.
Remember, I've never been to a cockfight, even though I live in
the cockfighting capitol of the world, so I'm just guessing.

And, inevitably they'll need to use the restroom, so I assume Rush and
Slappy would take turns holding each other's cock while they urinate?
After all, what are friends for?


It would be funny if it wasn't true.

Marty's Entertainment Page

always has good stuff.

Catholics Gone Wild
 126 L.A. Priests Raped Kids for 75 Years 


Throughout the files, cases of child molesting or rape are dealt with by indirection or euphemism, 
with references to questions of "moral fitness" or accusations of "boundary violations." For years, 
anonymous complaints of abuse were ignored and priests were given the benefit of every doubt.

The Los Angeles cases are in many ways typical of the sexual abuse claims that have stained the 
church around the country in recent years. The behavior of priests in Southern California was 
no worse than that seen elsewhere, and the response of senior church officials was generally 
no better. But the sheer scope of the claims and the potential for a huge payout to victims sets 
Los Angeles apart from archdioceses in other major American cities. 

...and they want to make John paul a saint? 
For closing his eyes to thirty years of child rapes? 

If they do that, I'm leaving the Catholic Church forever. 


U2 continues US tour

U2 played Boston last this week, did anybody go? 

They're in New York this week, selling out five nights at the Garden - did anybody go? 
I'll bet Rude Rich is there - with bells on - hoping to get Bono's autograph. 

Next is Philly, then DC, PittsburgH, Detroit Houston and Dallas on October 29th 

Send in your U2 concerts reports 


Call the

...as heard on BCR 83

Put your comments on the next radio show.

You have two minutes to record your message. 

 Today's oil theft total

 Iraq pumps 2,000,000 barrels a day,
(and that was before the 2002 Halliburton Upgrade) 
 times today's oil price which is  $64.12 a barrel
makes $128,240,000  Bush stole just yesterday

1956 1964 have died for Halliburton

8 more since yesterday
Why do military families keep sending 
their sons and husbands over there??


BFEE to rape America this winter


Winter heating bills will be 33-50 percent higher this year for most families across the country, 
with the sharpest increases expected for those who heat with natural gas, the Energy Department said.
The unstated reason is a trillion dollar gift to the Murder Monkey and his cronies.

The department said natural gas and propane users will pay an average of $350 more in Bush tributes 
than last year. Fuel oil will pay $378 more, and if you don't like those prices, if you're not happy paying
hundreds more to the oil monopoly, you can just f-ing freeze to death because they don't care

When asked at his daily briefing why everything that Bush controlled costs more these days, Scottie 
The Underbear Liar, batting his eyes in a somewhat appropriate manner at Jeff the Top Gannon
said, "If you don't like it, write a hot letter and shove it up your ass if you want to survive the cold winter," 

Then he smirked and walked away, flipping the bird at reporters.

These guys really are arrogant! 


Subject: Tiger rolls

I think that makes 46.

Bart,  you don't have to like him
Just give  him a little respect every now & then.

JB, I don't hate Toger Woods. 
Hell, I kinda like him   ha ha

If it was up to me, he'd win every tournament by fifty strokes. 
...and Tom Cruise would win "Best Actor" every year. 
...and Ted Nugent would win every year for "Best Guitar." 
And "Fear Factor" would win "Show with Best Taste." 

The only thing that matters is that the Dallas Cowboys lose. 
Every game. 


TV gone crazy!

The St Louis Cardinals vs the Enron Astros
Lost, the most frustrating show on TV, where it takes the hero
fifteen days to complete a sentence and don't try to disagree with that.
Invasion is turning out to be a good show.
There are worse shows than Veronica Bell on UPN.
Law & Order is doing the Terri Schiavo story
Mega-hottie Anna Belknap joins dull-till-nowCSI New York

Showtime is replaying that great final episode of Weeds.
Note: It's 33 minutes and you have to see the last ten seconds.
Plus, we get Howard Dean on Dave

VCR Alert
Sunday, October 16 at 1:00 am and at 11:00 am on C-Span2
My good friends Kurt Vonnegut and Barry Crimmins (Randi Rhodes Show) 

Description: From New York City, a panel discussion on political satire in America. 
The panelists share samples of their work and collectively answer audience questions. 
Taking part are: Kurt Vonnegut, author of "A Man Without a Country";
Click to Order

and Barry Crimmins, author of "Never Shake Hands with a War Criminal"; and others. 
Click to Order


Click Here to Search Bartcop

 Mischa Barton seen eating footlong hot dog
   Damn, I'd pay to watch that



While I was waiting in line for a beer before the U2 concert, who happened to stroll by but
Mischa Barton from The O.C.  Mischa busted on into the food court for some preshow grub.
Her dinner selection?
A Nathan's hotdog. It wasn't a regular 'dog either -- it was a footlong. It was enormous.


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