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Thursday  Nov 10, 2005   Volume 1652 - Free Caddy Rides

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Power of Nightmares

In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Iraq was about Oil
Bush's Tortured Truth 
Going to ethics class 
Barbecued Pigboy 
Judith Miller fired 
MoDo, celebrity pundit 
Dumping on Hillary 
Scooter Libby - pervert 
Paris Hilton rex car


 Quote of the Day

"Bush can't tie his shoelaces without Karl Rove."  
     --Eleanor Clift,    Link



Support Bartcop.com PO Box 54466 , Tulsa, OK 74155PayPal to https://www.paypal.com/affil/pal=bartcop@bartcop.com

Dozens   will see your banner

With Bush falling apart, hits are up.
Now's a great time to advertise on  bartcop.com


"What an appalling thought -- American women reduced to going outside 
  the health care system and acting like they're in a Third World country," 
    --  Dr. Wendy Chavkin, of Physicians for Reproductive Choice and Health   Link

Once the BFEE outlaws abortion (Thanks, Democrats!) Barb and Jenna will still be able 
to afford to travel to a blue state that allows women's rights. The poor women who find 
themselves needing an abortion can just take their chances with a coathanger. 


So Iraq Was About the Oil
   by Robert Parry as seen on  consortiumnews.com


When Colin Powell's former chief of staff Lawrence Wilkerson publicly decried Bush's bungling of 
U.S. foreign policy, the focus of the press coverage was on Wilkerson's depiction of a "cabal" headed 
by Cheney that had hijacked the decision-making process.

Largely overlooked were Wilkerson's frank admissions about the importance of oil in justifying a long-term 
U.S. military intervention in Iraq. "The other thing that no one ever likes to talk about is SUVs and oil and 
consumption," the retired Army colonel said in a speech on Oct. 19.

While bemoaning the administration's incompetence in implementing the war strategy, Wilkerson said the 
U.S. government now had no choice but to succeed in Iraq or face the necessity of conquering the Middle East 
within the next 10 years to ensure access to the region's oil supplies.

"We had a discussion in (the State Department's Office of) Policy Planning about actually mounting an operation 
to take the oilfields of the Middle East, internationalize them, put them under some sort of U.N. trusteeship and 
administer the revenues and the oil accordingly," Wilkerson said. "That's how serious we thought about it."

The centrality of Iraq's oil in Wilkerson's blunt comments contrasted with three years of assurances from the 
Bush administration that the war had almost nothing to do with oil.

Note: consortiumnews.com  is the most important site on the internet


Bush's Tortured Truth
 To him, they're just exploding frogs 


No sooner had President Bush told reporters on his stop in Panama that "we do not torture" 
than the army announced it would prosecute five of its Rangers for abusing detainees in Iraq.

The whole world saw pictures of us "not" torturing prisoners at Abu Graib.
The whole world knows Bush is lying, and as he continues to lie, he threatens a veto
if McCain tries to make "We don't torture" a law - so why does Bush keep lying?




''It's impossible to believe that Scooter Libby would have done this on his own, 
  but rather this was part of a larger conspiracy to attempt to discredit Joseph Wilson." 
     --Former Sen. Bob Graham, who believes Dick Cheney was a ''conspirator''   Link


Subject: banner ad

Hi Bart, 

The fifty dollar banner ad you ran for me worked very well. 
I more than paid for the ad with the orders I received. 
As soon as I can get more product ready to go, I'll be back. 
I'll admit I was skeptical about advertising but I can see now that it's 
a powerful way to reach a trageted audience at a remarkably low cost per hit.
Thanks again,


WH Staffers begin ethics classes 
 Rove and Libby were just following orders


White House workers, from presidential advisers to low-ranking aides, began attending mandatory lectures 
on ethical behavior and the handling of classified documents Tuesday after the recent indictment of a high-level 
official in the CIA leak case...The DNC dismissed the briefings. "Given that Karl Rove is still reporting for work 
every day with his security clearance, I'm sure the American people will see these so-called ethics classes for the 
cheap political stunt that they are," said communications director Karen Finney."

But why doesn't Dick and Der Monkey have to take those courses?
They knew what Rove and Libby were doing. Hell, Cheney ordered the illegal outing.
That's why Bush didn't ask Rove two years ago if he was involved - because they knew.

Speaking of ethics - is it wrong to lie 2059 soldiers into their graves?

                        "Why did we have to die?
 Because Cheney owns 400,000 shares of Halliburton stock."


"It's all mine, and it's all legal - thanks, Democrats!"

Last poll taken shows 59 percent of military families no longer trust Bush.
I wonder what the current number is?


 Barbecued Pigboy 


Prosecutors redoubled efforts to talk with Rush Limbaugh's medical providers, arguing in court Tuesday 
that they should be allowed to as part of their doctor-shopping investigation of the lying, Nazi whore. 
Attorneys for Limbaugh kicked up their aggressive defense too, seeking to hold prosecutors in contempt 
for allegedly leaking information to the media. Separately, Roy Black, the Kennedy's rape lawyer, argued 
that the confidentiality between a doctor and patient is a privilege not pierced even by criminal investigators. 
The law requires a waiver from Limbaugh to speak with his doctors, argued Black, and that was not forthcoming. 
"They cannot force Mr. Limbaugh to supply their evidence for them," Black said.

Hey Rush, might want to get back on that Dunkin Donuts diet.
I hear they like to molest fatboys in prison. 

Click  Here  to listen to Rush deny he's guilty.


Chapter Five
hJack and his Delta Force brother, Marty, reunite.

Click to Enter


"I just want to say: Who are we? We are people who have always been for inspections 
 of prisons, for some degree of human rights and now we're defending neither...
 We have now violated everything that we stand for. It is the first time in my life
  I have been ashamed of my country."   
       --NPR's Nina Totenberg on Bush's secret torture prisons,  Link

"Who would Jesus torture?
     Heh heh..."


Judith Miller fired from Whore Times?
 She says she quit - which lying whore do we believe? 


The New York Times and Judith Miller, the treasonous BFEE employee at the paper, reached an 
agreement yesterday that ended her 28-year career there after more than two weeks of negotiations.

Bill Keller, the executive editor, announced the move to the staff in a memorandum yesterday, saying, 
"In her 28 years at The Times, Judy participated in some great prize-winning journalism. But in her last
few years, she helped the illegal thug regime sell their bloody quagmire to the American people."

She said that in the few hours since her departure had been made public, she had received several offers 
"of all kinds" from the FOX News Network, the only "news outlet" that hires felons and traitors.



Subject: guns

Bart, you wrote:

> "Whatever the downside of gun ownership is, we have to deal with it.
>   Condemning guns does as much good as condemning rainy weekends. "

Notice that we can change "gun" and "guns" into just a <fill in> like this:

Whatever the downside of <fill_in_the_blank> ownership is, we have to deal with it.
Condemning <fill_in_the_blank>s does as much good as condemning rainy weekends.

Now, class, let's try Logic!  To wit:

Whatever the downside of RPG ownership is, we have to deal with it.
Condemning RPGs does as much good as condemning rainy weekends.

Ok, Bart, let's try another example!

Whatever the downside of WMD ownership is, we have to deal with it.
Condemning WMDs does as much good as condemning rainy weekends.


Point?  You have made NO POINT AT ALL! (!).

ha ha

My comment: Guns are bad in 99.9999% of the cases they are used.
You seem to be sticking up for that 0.0001% chance they might be useful.


Mac, you either forgot or chose to ignore the BIG fact.
If there were 200M RPG launchers in America, we'd have to deal with that.
If 200M people each had a WMD, we'd have to deal with that.

Bart didn't flood America with 200M guns.

As far as that " that 0.0001% chance guns might be useful," if you think the world is safe,
and if you trust the police to be there when trouble breaks out, maybe a gun is not right for you.

Final thought:
I imagine odds are 1-in-1,000 that your 9 year-old daughter would be raped and murdered,
so no need to caution her about getting into a car with a stranger, right?



Please visit our longest running sponsor

Kool Mo D, celebrity pundit
 by Gene Lyons 


Kool Mo D, as I've called Maureen Dowd since she emerged as queen of the Washington "Heathers" 
during the Clinton years, was just playing along. But what would she write about a public figure who
made her career lampooning the personal foibles of politicians, but insisted that her own intimate life 
was nobody's business, then invited magazine writers into her home to explore it ?

She'd say that person was confused.

What's significant about Dowd's confusion is how it illuminates the paradoxical rise of the celebrity pundit, 
journalists who achieve sublunary stardom by treating politics as "infotainment," appearing on TV and 
copping an attitude. Her witty eviscerations of Bush would be more persuasive, however, had she not also 
mocked Al Gore as "the teacher's pet from hell," Bill Clinton as "the Animal House president," etc. 
Back then, Dowd treated Bush as a down-to-earth alternative to the humorless Gore. 

She damn sure did, and thanks to Gene for saying that. Dowd is no friend to the Democrats.
If she wants to destroy Bush, then I'm all for that, I won't try to get in her way  But until she does 
an Arianna Huffington-type, "Lord, I have sinned," confession, don't assume she's on our team.

Plus, she lies.
Straight out, 
Like Rush Limbaugh.


Subject: keep the guns safe


I'm getting mixed signals from you.  You think I should have a gun to protect my family.  
But the gun should be kept in a safe place, such as a safe, with a combination.  
What good is the gun in a safe if your scenario of someone breaking down my door 
at 1 in the morning or a pit bull is attacking the neighbor kid?  
I'm not going to be able to get to it soon enough.

There are locks you can put on guns to keep the trigger from pulling which require a key.  
If the only key is on you at all times and readily available on your nightstand at night, then it might work.  
But losing a child to a gun is a pretty high risk and a lot higher of a probability than an attacker at 1 am, or 2, 3, etc.

Imperfect world, imperfect solutions.  Let's move to Mars.  :)
Russ from WY 

Russ, I don't like the key idea, because a smart 15 year-old can grab it while Dad's in the shower,
so you'd have to go with the combination lock and hope you remember the combination in a panic.

Granted, a locked gun won't help in a gotta-have-it-now situation, but it will help if you have
a gotta-have-it-in-60-seconds situation, such as a burglar trying to jimmy a window open.



Marty's Entertainment Page

always has good stuff.


"When people are fanatically dedicated to political or religious faiths or any other 
  kind of dogmas or goals, it's always because these dogmas or goals are in doubt."  
     --Robert Pirsig, explaining why the scared and the weak insist we agree with their 
        particular brand of illogical, religious superstitions,    Link


Subject: we'll always have Paris

hey bart~
after several days of shopping, laundry and packing, i finally got some time (at 4:00 am) 
to catch up on my bartcop reading. so i'm sitting here reading your latest trip report--that's why
i subscribe--and i'm willing to bet, that i'm the only bartcop reader to actually be in the paris hotel 
while reading about you being at the paris hotel in vegas! 

please bart, can you go to the real paris next time? 
do you think it was cheeky to ask the concierge when the curfew was? 

anyway, we had fine food and wine and the dopebear is snoring away in the fancy bed 
while i look out the window at le tour eiffel and lake como. what's even weirder is that
i know my doctor is right across the street at the bellagio tonight. 

we are on our way to the big drug conference in long beach with bartcop stickers and cameras at the ready!
not quite as good as a U2 concert, but maybe there will be samples.
love you!,

Amy, not sure about some of that, but thanks.


"My drunk husband did what?"


 Subject: donation

Hey Bart, 

I had a few spare coins that I wanted to send your way. 
If you have a sticker or two to spare, I gave all my last ones away to friends. 

Either way, thanks again!

Get your WPE sticker!    Free with your donation,

Plus two bartcop.com ovals and "I Miss Clinton" bonus sticker.
Four stickers for one donation!  (If you don't miss Clinton, I'll send the others)

You can donate with PayPal...or  snail mail.

 PO Box 54466
 Tulsa, OK  74155

  Click  Here  to subscribe or donate



Bush bullies hiding  bartcop.com  from you?

Surf anonymously
by entering bartcop.com at

Subject: Hillary should've known

Ask yourself this, Bart:  
How did Robert Byrd know Bush was lying?  
How did Carl Levin know Bush was lying?  
How did Dick Durban know Bush was lying?  
How did Russ Feingold know Bush was lying?  
How did Paul Welstone know Bush was lying?  
How did Bob Graham know Bush was lying?
How did all the rest of the senators who voted against the war know Bush was lying?

Are you sure they knew?
Or, after the fact, did they say, "we strongly suspected?"

I have a question for you: 
If they knew, why didn't they stop Bush from invading?
Each of them had the power to cut off the funding for the war, but they didn't. 


Face it, Hillary threw her support in with the lying Repugs and the Zell Miller's of the world.  
She voted to let the criminals empty out the bank and get our young people murdered.  
Like John Kerry, she should be shown for the sick politician that she is.

Joe, like most anti-Hillary Democrats, you fail to mention who is a better candidate.
The best anyone can offer is someone local and unknown, someone like Mark Warner, 
who 95 percent of the nation never heard of.

I say we have two choices: Hillary and whoever the BFEE bankrolls.
Hate Hillary all you want, but vote for her.


Subject: Randi Rhodes newsletter 

"All we are is dust in the wind."
- Kansas

"Gravity isn't real and dinosaurs are dragons from Hell."
- The Other Kansas

If Katrina and Iraq woke-up a politically sleepy nation to the horrors of neocon rule, 
let us hope what Kansas has done to their children exposes the extreme danger of the Rapture Right.

In a 6-4 ruling on Tuesday, the Kansas School Board has paved the way for Creationism to be taught, 
not in a comparative religion class, but as hard science.

Science is the study of the Natural World. Creationism is the study of the Supernatural World.

The US is chronically embarrassed by our pathetic math and science ranking in the world. 
More and more of our postgraduate research slots are being awarded to foreign students for lack of 
qualified or interested Americans. And as we enter the "century of biology," we are condemning 
ourselves to myth and magic while other nations simply pass us by.

Although, there are some signs of hope. Also on Tuesday, the people of Pennsylvania 
sent all the Flat-Earth freaks on their school board packing.

Get involved, stay informed and do the right thing even when no one is looking. 
We get but one chance to raise our kids.

Randi Rhodes

Someone sent an e-mail that said,

"Sixty four percent of Americans think Der Monkey is doing a bad job,
 The other 34 percent think Adam and Eve rode dinosaurs to Church."

That's as funny as it is scary.

The only people who still trust Bush are the religiously insane.
Even the greedy oil billionaires probably wish Bush was smart enough to help those poor people 
who died in New Orleans, but then again, it was only about 1,000 - and they were poor and black 
- so who cares, right?



"Even a liberal reporter is a patriot, wants the best for this country. 
 Your fair and balanced friends at Fox don't fully understand that." 
    --Mike Wallace, to his sellout, whore son, Chris, in an interview on Fox Whore News,  Link

 Mike, of course they know better.
 Whores get paid to lie, not to misunderstand the facts.


Is your  bartcop.com  subscription up to date?

Subject:  Got C.O.?

Dear Church of Reality Members,

I have just posted the church of Reality's position on Conscientious Objector Status. 
This is a tool that can be used to protect our families and friends from being forced to serve
in a military fighting an unjust war. It is rather detailed and I'd like to get some feedback on it. 
I'm sure there are some mistakes so you can proof it for me.

Here's the Link:


Information on Conscientious Objector Status can be found here:

As always, feedback is appreciated.

Marc Perkel
First One
Church of Reality 


Subject: you are correct, sir

I live in Minnesota and yesterday the stooge "Democrat" mayor of St Paul, 
Randy "I'm a Democrat like my bud Norm Coleman" Kelly, got his butt 
handed to him by a REAL Democrat in a whopping landslide.  

The city is in pretty good shape but Kelly got the boot because the idiot 
actually campaigned for Bush last year.  If you associate with Bush you
better be a brain dead fascist like him or you will go down.  

Keep swinging Bart!


Have you called the  lately?

...as heard on Bartcop Radio

Cat got your tongue?
Don't have any opinions?

Put your comments on the next radio show.

You have two minutes to record your message.


To Gale in Englewood, CO - sorry I accepted your donation and failed to send stickers. To make up for that, 
I sent you your stickers Priority with a 3-pack of BCR shows. I meant to send a hand-written apology but, of course, 
I'm such a dork that I sealed it without your apology so I thought I'd put it here and hope you see it.

Do I owe anything to anyone else?
If so, here's a general apology and please write and remind me.
It's hard to keep up with stuff, (I need a staff,) and thanks for having patience with me.


Subject: Hillary should've known 


I agree with Dave.  I understand your position that Hillary is in a bind 
when a pretzeldent stoops to actual lying to get what he wants.  She is.  

But aren't you basically conceding that if a POTUS is willing to lie (like Bunnypants did)
on whether there is sufficient evidence, then any smart politician has to get behind him, 
even if there is convincing, countervailing evidence?

Tack, I'm not sure I understand.
If Bush's CIA says, "Saddam can hit us in 45 minutes with WMDs," yeah, a good senator
is going to have to trust that unless, like you said, there is, "convincing, countervailing evidence."

Are you aware of any convincing, countervailing evidence available at the time? 

Note: "Everybody knew" is not considered evidence.


 Iraq pumps 2,000,000 barrels a day,
(and that was before the 2002 Halliburton Upgrade)
 times today's oil price which is  $58.93 a barrel
makes $117,860,000  Bush stole just yesterday

2058 2059 have died for Halliburton

One more family destroyed since yesterday - for what?
So Exxon can make $75,000 profit per minute?

"...just like Unka Dick predicted
Heh heh..."

Bush brought in a gusher of blood.


 Subject: A soldiers last trip to Washington DC

Team Bartcop,

Thanks for mostly telling it like it is.  
Bush is a plague, a pestilence, and blight on this great land.  But you know that.

Today we were in Washington DC and saw this hearse.  I saw the American Flag 
draped across the coffin so I snapped this photo.

It's safe to say it's not any congressman's or senator's kid.  
Probably this kid's first and last ride in a new Cadillac.  
No family, just a lone hearse and a soldier heading for the final resting spot (Arlington?).

Another encounter I doubt if the Bush Administration really wants us to notice.  
I hope you show it to everyone.

Otto B

That's damn sad.
I'm 52, that kid was probably less than 26, meaning I've had twice his lifetime.

He could've lived until 52 or 78, but Bush & Cheney got greedy, the sons of bitches.
I hope we get a Demo congress next election so this kid can get some justice.


Click Here to Search Bartcop

Subject:  Scooter Libby - pervert

Is anyone else deeply disturbed by this?  Here is a "man" who not only writes gratuitous porn 
involving bestiality, pedophilia, and centers around a young woman kept in a cage to sexually 
service bears, but is a key figure in a religiously insane administration that's doing it's damnedest 
to quash women's rights and their sexual self-determination.

 Amazon.com Link
(Click, but don't buy)

Why wasn't he investigated by the FBI before he was given such a high level government position?  
(Come to think of it, it's the same administration that was found to have the closely-held reporter 
with the homosexual prostitution website - he wasn't cleared by the FBI either.


I think it's worse than you describe. If I remember correctly, the "woman" is 9 or 10 years old.
I'm familiar with the insane male sex drive, but bears raping little kids in cages goes a little too far :)

Remember, Dick Cheney's shrew wrote a lesbian novel - why? - perhaps a fantasy about her daughter?

Sidebar: Last year's Randi Rhodes Year End "Best Of" on AAR? They told her Lynn Cheney wrote
a lesbian novel and Randi bet a staffer $1000 he was lying. Turns out she lost that bet and had to pay.
Trust me, she got $1000 worth of giggling out of if, and read parts on her show - it was damn funny.

But fantasies of bears raping children isn't all that funny - what's wrong with these "Christians?"
Which animals did Jesus fantasize about raping children?

Republicans have the same problems as priests - to them sex is "dirty" so they repress their sex drive
but then it explodes in all the wrong places, like an altar boy's rectum or Jeff Gannon's waterbed.
...and they say liberals are weird about sex?

The people who aren't getting any are the wierdos.



I didn't see any e-mails calling my trip report "racist."

Did people actually get that it was a joke?
I think I'll light one up, pour a shot of Chinaco and ponder that remote possibility.

(...exhale, swallow, ...)

Nah, I musta just missed those angry e-mails.


Paris Hilton OK after car crash 
 Photographers involved again

 Paris Hilton - Halloween 2005


A videotape shows what appears to be Hilton's companion, Stavros Niarchos, slamming a Bentley 
into the back of a truck as the couple left a Hollywood nightclub with at least two other people.
The tape shows the damaged car speeding away from the scene as bystanders and photographers scatter. 

I saw the tape.
The papparazzi surrounded the car and it was lucky one of them wasn't crushed.
It would be a shame if one of them was crushed.  
A damn shame.


Please accept a collective "Thank you" to  bartcop.com  subscribers.
I'm attempting to do five issues in five days and by thanking you on the page
I have freed up almost enough time to do and extra issue, assuming that's a good thing.


 Read the  Previous Issue

 It had  everything.

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