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This Just In: Man
Cheney Shot Has Heart Attack
Tuesday Feb 14, 2006 Volume
1708 - Bangers & mash
We're coming into the political season
in your 2006 ads at current prices
"It's time for an award to John Boehner. Mr.
Boehner was elected to reform House Republicans,
who are feeling the heat from lobbyist
scandals. Well, he rents his apartment from a lobbyist who
had clients who had interests in legislation
that Boehner sponsored. And for that, Mr. Boehner,
you've just won a pair of Stephen Colbert's
big brass balls."
-- Stephen Colbert,
hunter in face
He looooooooooves to pull triggers
Unka Dick accidentally shot and wounded a companion
during a quail hunting trip in Texas,
spraying the fellow hunter in the face and chest
with shotgun pellets. Cheney claims he didn't
see the man who "came up from behind" the quail-hunting
(Why is Cheney blindly shooting behind him?)
Harry Whittington, a millionaire (of
course, he's with Cheney) attorney from Austin,
was "alert and doing fine"
in a Corpus Christi hospital Sunday after he
was shot by Cheney on a ranch in south Texas, said Katharine
Armstrong, the property's owner. He was
in stable condition Sunday, said Yvonne Wheeler.
Armstrong said Whittington, 78, was injured on
his right side, with the pellets hitting his cheek, neck and chest
during the incident which occurred late afternoon
Had the victim ended up dying, would we have ever heard about the shooting
key committee assignment
He's not as dead as we thought
Indicted Rep. Tom DeLay, forced to step down
after being identified as the most crooked man in Congress,
scored a soft landing Wednesday as GOP leaders
rewarded him with a coveted seat on the Appropriations Committee.
DeLay, (R-Squirrely bastard), also claimed a seat
on the subcommittee overseeing the Justice Department,
which is currently investigating Jack Abramoff
and his dealings with DeLay. The subcommittee also runs NASA
-- a top priority for DeLay, since the Johnson
Space Center is located in his Houston-area district.
It's like a Don running the mob from his jail cell, but DeLay doesn't
even have to go to jail.
I guess that's what happens when your partner is the crooked president.
not a full partner."
fuels Arab fury at West
Arab fury at the West intensified on Monday after
images of British soldiers apparently beating
Iraqi youths were aired in a region already inflamed
by caricatures of the Prophet Mohammad.
Some Arabs said the video, like the Danish newspaper
cartoons, was proof of the contempt
the West held for Islam, the dominant faith in
the Middle East.
They also said the 2004 beatings, which were publicized
by a British newspaper on Sunday, exposed
the ugly side of Britain's presence in Iraq despite
its efforts to put a "friendly face" on the occupation.
We've lost this war.
Just like Vietnam, we can continue to push soldiers
into a meat-grinder, but we've lost the war.
We can't just leave, no matter how much the illogical
left wants to.
Leaving gives Zarqawi the beheader a billion
dollars a week - so we can't do that,
no matter how much the illogical left wants to.
(Here's where the illogical left calls me "Bush's
pawn and a big fan of Rush Limbaugh.")
Before you left-wall huggers call me more names,
could you answer that simple question?
afford to give Zarqawi a billion dollars a week?
or no, please, then you can send War and Peace,
but only after you answer the simple question.
Prediction: The illogical left will refuse
to answer that simple question because, horrors,
answering truthfully would cause them to agree
with Hillary and they'd rather die than do that.
have the courage to answer that question, Bart!
Subject: Zep my ass
Led Zeppelino was hands down the worst fucking
band in all of rock history.
They single-handedly killed rock'n'roll.
Don't forget the Beatles and Pink Floyd - they
Steal a few blues riffs and have skinny rock gods
sing like eunuchs and wail away on stolen riffs
and make very public displays of how legitimate
they are because of how much whiskey they drink
before each show and how many groupies line up
to sex them after each show and how many millions
of dollars their record company pumps into them
because they can ultimately gain control of what
the kids love and want to buy if they just ram
it down their throats enough.
Meanwhile, other bands are carrying the real water
for the music created by countless blues men
and others too many to count and not one them
made a goddamn dime because they didn't fit the
corporate white godly theme of what rock and
roll should be.
And that's why I've never bought one single record
by U2, Garbage, No Doubt, Mariah Carey
or any "rapper" after Public Enemy.
So, any band that gets signed is, by definition, a loser?
That means all the "good" bands are the ones that nobody will sign?
BTW, you forgot to mention which record company dismissed you...
Subject: 9-11 debate
I know you like to debate, so I also offer you
this friendly challenge.
I will debate you any time, in any forum,
in any format (as long as I don't have to travel far) on the facts
I admire your intelligence, but if you take this
challenge I must warn you, you don't stand a chance.
In fact, if you can't find a mirror site that
wants a couple canadian gold maple leafs, I offer a bet.
Any price you name up to $1000 cash for a published
live debate on 911.
Win or lose the debate gets recorded and published
Before you accept I recommend that you go to:
and read up on the subject.
Try this one first:
of the World Trade Center:
Why the Official Account Cannot Be True
by David Ray Griffin, Ph.D.
Mr. Griffin gives 11 reasons why the official
account is physically and logicaly impossible.
He also offers six examples of obvious false
or misleading statements in the final report.
D, I'm not sure we have anything to debate.
I have no idea what happened on 9-11, besides what I saw on TV.
All I'm saying is as long as the proof comes in 100,000 word essays,
as long as the proof
is being vouched for by people we've never heard of, without a Cronkite
or major political figure
to spearhead the "findings," the "9-11 truth movement" won't get any
farther than it's gotten.
If you want to spend some money and make your views known, contact
He's the best ISP you can get.
Subject: fill out this survey!!!
Mr. Bart, the following was a letter posted on
"Please, please, please, pretty please, sugar
and cream on strawberries, post this link.
If your readers answer it, it will be verrry interesting!
It is a survey for the Democratic Congressional
I filled it out and mostly made 'other' comments
like 'Get a spine! Get new blood that will fight!!!!'
On one question I told them to 'Read bartcop.com
for campaign advice!!!'
Bart, you need to get all your reader/listener
fans to Hammer these guys - they want this to be a reasoned
headbanger survey - get Bartcopers to show some
emotion & muscle !!!
I went there and did the same thing you did, answering mostly "other."
I said, "You guys ask for money, then you cave in to Bush - every
I won't send another dime until after
you scared bunnies start fighting back.
STOP CAVING INTO BUSH!"
They want our money so they can cave in? NO,
I work too hard for my money
to give it to gutless cowards who see their jobs as caving into to
that shithead Murder Monkey.
Take the time - go there and vent your anger at the gutless cowards.
Tell them they won't get any money until AFTER
they start fighting back.
Shortly after Katrina, Linda Berg wrote a letter
to the editor criticizing the Bush Administration.
After the paper published the letter in its September
15-21 issue, VA administrators seized her computer,
alleged that she had written the letter on that
computer, and accused her of "sedition."
"The Agency is bound by law to investigate and
pursue any act which potentially represents sedition," he said.
"In your letter . . . you declared yourself 'as
a VA nurse' and publicly declared the Government which employs
you to have 'tragically misplaced priorities
and criminal negligence' and advocated, 'act forcefully to remove a
government administration playing games of smoke
and mirrors and vicious deceit.' "
Can you believe that?
A lady writes a letter to the editor and the fascist bastards seize
Surely, Democrats condemned this outrage, right?
Bart, she said bad things about Fearless Leader!"
"The Senate offices were evacuated when they
found a suspicious substance.
Turns out it was just Ted Kennedy's
-- David Letterman,
in Abramoff Photo
After saying, "no record of Abramoff at 2001 meeting..."
Just how close was the relationship between Bush
and his top controbutor?
Bush again faced questions about those ties after
an Abramoff e-mail surfaced last week in which
Abramoff wrote that he had met Bush almost a
dozen times over the past five years, and even received
an invitation to the fake ranch. Abramoff
mused in the e-mail, He "saw me in almost a dozen settings,
and joked with me about a bunch of things, including
details of my kids."
need tech help
My radio software got wiped out during the move to the new computer.
Real, real fast, I need more radio software.
I need to buy Cool Edit Pro - how is that done?
They got bought by Adobe, but is the software the same?
(I see they raised the price $100)
Would I be better off with different software?
I wish I had learned on Pro-Tools, but I didn't,
Is Pro-Tools much diff from Cool Edit Pro?
I need this really fast, and I'll pay what I have to.
I need software that's simple and dependable.
Who has some suggestions? I set up a special "tect" mail folder.
I need this really fast, and I'll pay what I have to.
"All we ask is that we not turn into a country
where the president can do anything
-- Howard Dean, being mean to the self-appointed Emporer,
Longtime bartcop.com advertiser
on a mini van.
"The ultimate source for all your Beat Generation
It had an Okie license, but a Irving, CA license frame.
Jerry, even the Okies know about you!
a part of Bartcop Radio
"From a short item inside the Times' business
section Sunday: "War always has winners
and losers -- on both sides." Some
"indisputable winners" so far? Defense contractors.
Courtesy of the Times, we find Halliburton's
profits are up 292 percent."
-- Tim Grieve, Link
Military families don't mind that Bush's fake war and Halliburger
stock is making Cheney super-richer?
Subject: Nat'l Guard/W bust and
the omitted date
...perhaps they are hoping he will be impeached
before his term ends.
Remember, many of these guys are being sent over
for their third tours.
They have had more than enough from the guy who
simply walked away from his Nat'l Guard duty.
Bart, you said:
> "That assumes gambling is a bad thing, which
Bart, gambling is indeed a bad thing for some
My mom was addicted to alcohol, pills, cigarettes
She blew a small fortune in Nevada Casino's before
she moved to Minnesota.
Unfortunately, Indians built a Casino nearby
and she gambled away every last nickel she had.
She finally took her own life when she didn't
have anything left.
I don't know what the solution is. I believe some
sort of oversight is necessary,
but corrupt politicians and lobbyists are not
the answer either; just look at the Abe Jackemoff Scandal.
Steve, sorry about your Mom - sounds like she was an addictive personality.
Sure, gambling can be hard to handle for some people, but so can love,
cars, music, guns, sex etc.
We can't outlaw everything that can't be handled by everybody.
Last week, the GAO issued a stinging report on
the failure of Chertoff and Brownie to demonstrate leadership during Katrina
that ''serves to underscore the immaturity" of
the nation's response capabilities. GAO Comptroller David Walker noted
''No one was designated to lead the federal response
despite clear warnings from the Hurricane Center." He wrote how the
delay by Chertoff to declare Katrina as a catastrophic
event failed to trigger appropriate resources. He said Brown's role under
Chertoff was so unclear that it resulted in 'the
absence of timely and decisive action and clear leadership responsibility
Bush should be impeached for letting those 6,000
Add the 2,450
from Iraq and the 3,000
from 9-11 and it makes me hark back to the days
when the budget surplus and the president's girlfriend were the biggest
problems America faced.
Subject: ultimate 9-11 question
If gasoline fire melted thick steel columns on
then everytime you light up your gas grill, shouldn't
it collapse and fall apart?
Ed, it might if it had the weight of a 100-story skyscraper on it.
for body armor
Last month, the Army signed a $70 million contract
for ceramic body armor.
But not all soldiers will get it, and some troops
currently have the wrong size armor, so the need still exists,
said Tammara Rosenleaf, whose husband was deployed
from Fort Hood in Central Texas in December.
The Bake Sales for Body Armor fundraiser also
will provide medical supplies and other needed gear.
"When I realized my husband didn't have the side
and deltoid body armor, the feeling of desperation to
have it for him was overwhelming," said Rosenleaf.
"It occurred to me that no one loves their soldier
any less than I love my husband, and people would
do just about anything to get the armor to them."
Subject: hockey and Janet Gretzsy
Seriously, Bart, I know you love a little risk/return
now and then, but how can you be this obtuse about gambling in sports?
Dude, are you taking a tone with me?
When someone attached to the sport gambles, particularly
on their own freaking team (see Pete Rose-- the fact is that he
bet money that the team he was in charge of would
lose and then arranged things so they had a greater chance of it happening),
there's always going to be a whiff of conflict
I think your facts are wildly crazy and wrong.
Who said Pete gambled on his team to lose?
I never heard that before - is that true or did
you make that up?.
I have perspective. This isn't Cheney awarding
no-bid contracts to Halliburton, but it's still conflict of interest.
Only if he does that of which he's been falsely
Gambling is not the problem; it's who's doing
the gambling and the information they have access to being the problem.
You don't seriously think someone who's married
to the head coach of a pro hockey team and apparently has great
affection for the sport doesn't know more about,
say, the team's player's injuries than fans, or people who aren't
connected directly with the team?
I'm for less government myself, but even if gambling
on sports outside of Nevada were legal, this would be pushing it,
or outright breaking the law.
This is the same as insider trading, but buying and selling stocks is
still legal, right?
If Janet used inside info to give her a gambling edge, that's cheating,
but gambling isn't the problem.
Hackett feels betrayed, exits politics
Paul Hackett, an Iraq war veteran and popular
Democratic candidate in Ohio's Senate contest,
said that he is dropping out of the race and
leaving politics as a result of pressure from party leaders.
Hackett said Chuck Schumer and Harry Reid, the
same people who persuaded him to enter the Senate race,
had pushed him to step aside so that Rep. Sherrod
Brown could take on Sen. Mike DeWine.
"This is an extremely disappointing decision that
I feel has been forced on me," said Hackett.
He said party leaders were calling his donors
and asking them to stop giving.
"For me, this is a second betrayal," Hackett said.
"First, my government misused and mismanaged
the military in Iraq, and now my own party is
afraid to support candidates like me."
Doesn't it figure?
We have a good-looking, popular war hero - and we dump him for someone
Let's hope he doesn't get so demoralized that he joins the dark side.
Why are Democrats so hell-bent on suicide?
Is Bart worthy of a tip?
has good stuff.
Subject: Cheney "the shooter"
Hey, I've been laughing my ass off about this
Can't wait to visit the site today and read more
Loved Letterman's show last night where Biff Henderson
in blaze orange kept shooting a hunter out of the sky!
Also, Letterman incredulous over the cover up
said, "...why didn't they just finish the guy off and bury him in a shallow
This is the most fun I've had in ages!
At Scottie's press briefing, when reporters kept
referring to Cheney as "the shooter" I thought I'd split a gut.
Hammer on Bart! Love ya!
Patty, we have that press briefing coming in BCR
It's so full, it might have to be a quad CD show.
Ann uses Schick's new Quatro razor.
I don't, my 5 O'Clock shadow
in about 2 and we can't have that!"
Bush bullies hiding bartcop.com
by entering bartcop.com at
Subject: Perkel and Muslims
Re- Marc Perkel's Quote Regarding Muslim Violence.
I can't count on one hand the times I've disagreed
with Marc Perkel, until now.
So Marc, you're only at "1," and that's pretty
damn good. But are too Muslims violent? Yes.
Do too many interpret, perhaps even correctly,
the Koran in vile and horrible ways? Yes.
But to paint all in almost any one mainstream
faith with such a broad brush is as bad as those
who paint all atheists or Christians with similar
Ken, have you seen any Muslim higher-ups condemn
There surely must be some, but where are they?
Why don't we hear their voices?
The Pope condemns abortion bombings - why don't
Imams and Ayatollahs condemn suicide bombers?
trade young men for oil."
Iraq pumps 2,000,000 barrels a day,
(and that was before the 2002 Halliburton Upgrade)
times today's oil price which is
$62.31 a barrel
Bush stole just yesterday
2267 have died for Bush's oil greed
Bush's gusher of blood.
will oil hit $100 a barrel?
March 4, 2008?
"Now I understand why Dick Cheney keeps asking
me to go hunting with him."
-- James Brady,
No, liberals, it's not your imagination. "Meet
the Press" and the other Sunday political talk shows really have leaned
more to the right in recent years. At Media Matters
for America, we looked at every one of the 7,000 guests who
appeared on the three major Sunday shows in Clinton's
second term, Bush's first term, and last year. We found that
the left has of late found itself outnumbered,
in some ways substantially, on the shows that define the Washington
conventional wisdom. Liberals are already a disturbingly
rare species among what Calvin Trillin refers to as the
"Sabbath Gasbags." And in some debates - the
war in Iraq, for example - they are in danger of becoming extinct."
In a way, this makes sense.
If all the Democrat is going to do is wimper an apology, why have him
(or more) and get a
x 2 = 6 BCR Discs
86 Christmas Special Woo Hoo!
and the critically-acclaimed BCR
and the just-released BCR
delivered directly to your home like magic
Part Sticker Package, ....
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If you're already a subscriber, keep the discs and the stickers
and give the 90 days of BCR to that smart-ass ditto-monkey at
CDs for just $24
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runs into protest
Attorney General Alberto Tortureboy Gonzales
had trouble tapping into a group of
hooded protesters at Georgetown Law School in
Washington on Tuesday.
The university was one of the stops on Gonzales'
circuit as he attempts to defuse criticism
of George W. Bush's illegal domestic spying program
on innocent Americans.
Gonzales didn't acknowledge the sign nor did he
stop his speech as 22 protesters,
including the four with the sign, stood with
their backs to him during the address.
Five protesters left the room during the speech.
That's what the Democrats should do - leave the room while Drrf Monkey
but that would take a modicum of courage so we can't expect that from
the all new, toll-free
callers Welcome (snicker)
"It is an outrage that the Democratic Party
has forced Paul Hackett out of the race for U.S. Senate.
Hackett brought credibility on the number
one issue facing the nation - the war in Iraq.
The Democratic Party loses credibility
on that issue because they had a hand in his decision."
-- Jon Stoltz, director of Veterans Political Action
"Support the Troops, Send them to Congress!"
-- Wes Clark Link
Each day, it seems, the Democrats move farther away from the voters.
Children could run this party better.
Hell, *I* could run this party better.
At least I wouldn't organize daily suicide rallies.
My good friend Faun Otter had an idea.
He recently sent a large check and asked for all the
BartCop Radio Shows.
I reminded him that all subscribers get all
the BartCop Radio Shows for free
but he's getting all the shows in stereo, 128-bit whatever that's called.
For financial reasons, we have to post the shows in lesser quality.
To make shipping practical, the shows are burned "ISO" instead of as
which means you can play them on a computer, but not on a standard
That's the bad news - the good news is you retain all the quality,
and we can fit all 100 shows on about 15 CDs instead of 200
and you can burn audio copies yourself with your computer.
I'm not saying this is something you gotta have.
I'm just saying you can get all 100 shows in the best quality possible
for, say, $2.50 per show.
Note: Only 88 shows have been completed, I'll
owe you the last dozen shows.
If we get any takers, we'll put the proceeds in
a Travel Fund.
As I wind down, they say I'll need chemo - but
we're not there yet.
Mrs. Bart wants to visit some places (like Alaska)
while I still have the strength.
ABC gained traction in Thursday's ratings as
"Dancing with the Stars" became the first show
since "Friends" to draw more viewers than "Survivor"
in head-to-head competition.
ABC's sizzling celebrity dance contest averaged
a season-high 20 million viewers
directly opposite "Survivor: Panama -- Exile
Island" on CBS,
Thank you to bartcop.com subscribers.
I know you work hard
for your money, so I take it as
a compliment when you throw some my way each month.
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It had everything.
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