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Thu-Fri  June 8-9, 2006  Volume 1779 -  "It's all for you, George"

Quote of the Day

"There's no issue more important 
   than banning gay marriage." 
     -- GOP handjob Sen. David Vitter (LA)   Link

 With that attitude, Bush might put him 
  in charge of Homeland Security.

In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Why Democrats Lose 
Brits Losing Faith
Coulter: "Witches" 
Army Officer says "No" 
Zarqawi's Dead Ass 
Creepy Jim Inhofe 
Palast on Zarqawi 
Bush Won't Admit
Emmy for Kristen Bell? 


Barry Crimmins, (writes for Randi Rhodes)
has a downloadable, iPod-ready comedy album

Get it at


"Perhaps [Ann Coulter's] book should have been called 'Heartless.'
  I know a lot of the widows and family members who lost loved ones on 9/11.
  They never wanted to be a member of a group that is defined by the tragedy of what happened."
     -- the junior senator from New York Link

"We have been slandered. Contrary to Ms. Coulter's statements, there was no joy in watching
  men who we loved burn alive. There was no happiness in telling our children that their fathers
  were never coming home again. We adored these men and miss them every day..."
      -- Kristen Breitweiser, Lorie Van Auken, Mindy Kleinberg and Patty Casazza,  Link

 I said many years ago that this kind of shit would be f-ing EASY to stop, if they listened to me.

 All the Democrats have to do is say, "Ann Coulter and Rush Limbaugh and Michael Savage
 speak for the President and the Republican Party and their remarks are shameful and
 hurtful and they drive America apart at a time when we should be coming together."

 What would this accomplish?

 It would force Bush and others to say, "Coulter, Limbaugh and Savage DO NOT speak for us,
 and we agree their remarks ARE shameful, hurtful and divisive and we apologize for them."

 And that would turn Coulter, the Pigboy and Savage against the GOP.
 It would also force O'Reilly, Hannity and every Rush clone to take a side.

 It would be hate radio against the GOP and we could sit back and watch
 as the Republicans dissolved into a costly, bloody civil war.

 It's SO EASY, ...but no, the Democrats have no idea how to win a debate.

 It's SO EASY, ...but no, the Democrats choose to surrender instead of fight.


Why Democrats Lose
  by Robert Parry  as seen on


The defeat of Democrat Francine Busby in a special congressional election outside San Diego was
a case study in why Democrats lose. With conservatives dominating the media and with Busby running
a "safe" consultant-driven campaign, the Republicans pounced on a minor verbal slip-up by Busby in
the final days and propelled Brian Bilbray to victory. The question now is: what can the Democrats
do to ever break out of their cycle of losing?

It pains me to disagree with Parry on this (and I wasn't able to follow the race) but Bilbray misspoke 
something about illegals voting and the GOP pounced on it and made that the issue of the campaign. 

If I had been on the Busby team, I would've grabbed 100 of Bush's most incredibly stupid verbal gaffs
and run every damn one of them and then say, "Busby misspoke - it happens," but noooooooo, 
apparently the Busby team failed to return fire on the GOP's hardball tactics, so the seat that opened 
up due to the corruption of Duke Cunningham went to a different corrupt Republican, instead..

When will the Democrats learn that you have to fight to win?

How many races in a row do they have to lose before they learn?

Note:  is the most important site in the Internet




"The next time a Republican wraps himself in 9/11 or uses a soldier as a prop -- the next time
  Bush watches a 9/11 movie with 9/11 families, the next time he invites the father of a fallen
  soldier to join him in throwing out a first pitch, the next time he participates in a staged chat
  with troops in the field, the next time his party holds its national political convention within
  shouting distance of ground zero, the next time the mother of a fallen soldier turns up in
  Laura Bush's box at the State of the Union address, the next time Cheney suggests that
  questioning the president's Iraq policy somehow equates to undercutting the troops --
  remember this: It's the Democrats, not the Republicans, who do this sort of thing.
  Just ask Ann Coulter."
     -- Tim Grieve,   Link


Brits Losing Faith in U.S.


The British public has become increasingly cool towards American policy and critical of its role
in the world after the sustained violence in Iraq.

A new poll in says fewer than half the public believe that America is a force for good in the world,
and nearly two thirds believe that Britain's future lies more with Europe than with the US.

This shift in opinion on Iraq has also been reflected in views about the US.   58 per cent believe that
it is important for "Britain's long-term security that we have a close and special relationship with the US".
This compares with 71 per cent as recently as two months ago.

If, one by one, your friends leave you, it generally does NOT mean you're right and they're wrong.
It means YOU are wrong.

In November, will the voters stick with the party of war, invasions, deficits and tax cuts
for the super-rich while the poor and middle class continue to spiral downward?


Coulter calls 9/11 widows "witches"
 "Millionaire waitches" to be exact


Ann Coulter (R-Slut) sparked a storm on Wednesday after describing a group of 9-11 widows
who backed the Democratic Party as millionaire "witches" reveling in their status as celebrities.

"I've never seen people enjoying their husbands' deaths so much," Coulter writes in her book "Godless,"
referring to four women who headed a campaign that resulted in the creation of the 9-11 Whitewash
Commission that praised Bush's leadership and heroic decision-making that day.


Like I said, they could've ruined Ann Coulter many years ago, but the clueless Dems just can't
figure out a way to defang the monster, even after they've been told exactly how to do it.

Why can't they learn?


Subject: My shirt arrived today

My first WPE shirt arrived 6/8/06.  It's so good I'm gettin' another one.
Make this one a men's medium to leave a little more room for some South's Finest chocolate. :)

Al Gore's in town for a book signing, I'll ask if he wants one.
Keep swingin' that hammer


Officer says "No" to Bush
 He refuses to be "party to war crimes"


The wholesale slaughter and mistreatment of the Iraqi people is not only a terrible moral injustice but a 
contradiction of the Army's own law of land warfare. My participation would make me party to war crimes," 
said First Lt. Ehren Watada  in a taped statement played at a Tacoma news conference.

His superiors at the nearby Fort Lewis would not let Watada leave the base to attend the press conference. 
Another news conference took place in Watada's native Hawaii.    Watada said his moral and legal obligations 
were to the U.S. Constitution "not those who would issue unlawful orders."

It takes guts to say "No!" to the Murder Monkey and his crimes.


Subject: Jeff the Cannon

Bart, you asked,

> So how did Jeff the Cannon, a gay prostitute get White House press credentials under
> a fake name so Bush could call on him whenever he needed a friendly, puff-piece question?

I'd bet Pickles has been asking that same question.



Saw it on

Zarqawi's Dead Ass
Bush: "Remarkable" that they finally got him

  "My dead ass..."


al-Zarqawi, the beheading handjob, was killed when U.S. warplanes bombed his safehouse,
officials said Thursday. His death was a long-sought victory in the war in Iraq.

Al-Zarqawi and several aides, including spiritual adviser Sheik Abdul Rahman, were killed
Wednesday evening 30 miles from Baghdad in the volatile province of Diyala.

"Al-Zarqawi was eliminated," Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki said.

Congrats to the military for getting this scumbag, but then again, this is the only second guy
that we've heard of that they've captured or killed since Saddam.  Every few weeks, they say
that captured or killed "Mr Big" that nobody ever heard of in some country. At least this time,
we know they got some douche that actually needed dying.



Unreported: The Zarqawi Invitation
  by Greg Palast - one of the best


They got him, but something's gone unreported in all the glee over getting Zarqawi
who invited him into Iraq in the first place?

Begin with this: A phone call to Saddam's Palace on April 21, 2003. 
It was Rumsfeld on a secure line from Washington to General Jay Garner.

The General had arrives in Baghdad just hours before to take charge of the newly occupied nation. 
The message from Rumsfeld was not a heartwarming welcome. 
Rummy told Garner, Don't unpack, Jack you're fired.

What had Garner done? 
The many-starred general had been sent by the President himself to take charge of a deeply dangerous mission. 
Iraq was tense but relatively peaceful. Garner's job was to keep the peace and bring democracy.

Unfortunately for the general, he took the President at his word. 
But the general was wrong. "Peace" and "Democracy" were the slogans.

"My preference," Garner told me in his understated manner, "was to put the Iraqis 
in charge as soon as we can and do it in some form of elections."

But elections were not in The Plan.

The Plan was a 101-page document to guide the long-term future of the land we'd just conquered. 
There was nothing in it about democracy or elections or safety. There was, rather, a detailed schedule
for selling off "all [Iraq's] state assets" and Iraq, that's just about everything "especially," 
said The Plan, "the oil and supporting industries." Especially the oil.


Subject: My WPR shirt arrived!

My WPE t-shirts have arrived!
Thanks, Bart.

Just in time for the Democratic convention here in Wisconsin.
Will try to get a picture with Russ Feingold and a bartcop sticker!




Put your voice on BartCop Radio



"How do we know their husbands weren't planning to divorce these harpies?
  Now that their shelf life is dwindling, they'd better hurry up and appear in Playboy."
       -- Ann Coulter, on the 9-11 widows, Link


Subject: Bart, is it true?

Hey Bart,

The Truth about George W Bush

Here you will find out the little known truth concerning Bush, Victor Ashe, the current US
ambassador to Poland (formerly mayor of Knoxville, Tennessee and CFO of Fannie Mae),
and their adulterous-bisexual relationship with a Las Vegas woman in 1984.

"George Fellatio Bush" ... has a lovely ring to it, no ?

Mark in Switzerland


Creep of the Week - Jim Inhofe
  by John Montgomery


My theory is that bloviating homophobes like James are secretly obsessed with an overwhelming desire
to grab on to one of those hairy-assed weight lifters from the gym and hump themselves silly all night long.
But let's give James the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he's just a family-valued Christian man who believes
all sex should be between a happily married man and woman, done in the missionary position with as little
noise as possible. A man of such moral rectitude would surely surround himself with like-minded people
who would set a sterling example for the rest of us deviant heathens. Right?

Obviously you forgot. James is a Huge Hypocrite!


Subject: Gore 2000


Do you really think that if Gore had called on Democrats to come down to Florida and "create a ruckus"
it would have had a positive effect? Maybe you and I would have thought it a positive thing, but I don't
think it would have helped in the legal wrangling. Also, you must remember that the mainstream media,
which had been shamefully trashing Gore for two whole years, was busy at the time pushing for Gore
to concede, which he did not do. Calling for a rumble in the streets would have gotten terrible press,
making it all the harder for Gore to continue to fight the way he chose to do it, through the legal process.
That fight went all the way to the Supreme Court, as far as you can go in this country.
(You still haven't told me what Gore should have done after the court did it's dirty deed.)

As for the recount, we can call that a political mistake, but, at the time, a lot of people were saying that
a "selective" recount was the smart way to go. I didn't think so, but they never ask me. Also, it's my
understanding that a full state recount would require a request from both parties. I believe that Gore
actually did ask for that eventually, but the Bush team would not agree. No surprise there.

So, Bart, as usual, my beef with you is not that mistakes weren't made. I just don't think it's fair
for you to keep saying that Gore gave up or didn't want it badly enough. He chose to fight it his way,
and he took it as far as he could. He did not surrender.

As someone who supported both Gore and Kerry, I see a big difference in how they reacted.
Again, I don't think it's fair to paint them with the same brush.
Keep up your hammerin'
Dan Leahy


The net's best advertising deal

Reach over twenty people per penny.

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Vote Nall, Y'all


Loretta Nall is really shaking things up in Alabama. The anti-drug-war libertarian candidate for Governor
not only has people talking about the drug war, she managed to get two of the candidates for Sheriff,
one of whom is the current Police Chief, to completely reverse their positions on the drug war.
They admitted that the drug war is a miserable failure.

Duh, did they also admit it gets dark at night?

We could take every fresh-faced cop posing as a student trying to buy a joint and put them
on the hunt for Osama, but we don't because the real danger to America is the Devil's weed.


Subject: got my WPE t-shirt


Shirt arrived the other day it is awesome.
Can't decide who I want to spring it on first.
I will make sure to take pics.

Maybe I can find Governor Romney and have a pic in the shirt with him.
Thanks for supporting



"Shut up or I will kill you!"
 Cops rough up 53 year-old Bush protestor


I am 53 years old, not exactly a spring chicken. A hand comes down again to push my chin against
the concrete. By this time there are four cops on the scene. My hands are tightly cuffed behind my back.
They lift me up and shove me onto a parkbench and shackle my legs. I am still calling out, telling people
what this is about. One of the cops says to me, "Shut up or I will kill you!", "I am sick of this anti-Bush shit!"
"You are definitely going to the psyche ward." Then somebody calls the EMS, and a fire squad shows up.
The cop superviser appears and puts his finger in my face: "I dont like it when people treat my men like this
and if you don't obey the law you will suffer the consequences."


Marty's Entertainment Page

always has good stuff.

Click  The  E!

Nobody sent a picture today?

Send in a picture of you in your WPE t-shirt!

 Here's my picture, Bart!


Official WPE t-shirts!!

We have men's and women's shirts in S, M, L, XL and XXL.
They're free with a mere $21 (or more) donation.

PayPal to

Tell us what size

or send a check to
PO Box 54466
Tulsa, OK  74155


Late night I was reading some e-mail, and I saw one titled something like
"t-shirt encounter with Shirley," but as I clicked on it, I sneezed and it was gone.

Whatever that was, could whoever sent it re-send it?

If any of you run into Shirley Manson, tell her "Bart says hey,"
then give her a bad time for not writing or calling the bartphone or something.

If she's wearing a WPE t-shirt, steal a camera from a drugstore and send me a picture
and if you get caught, I'll go $1,000 towards your bail (proper collateral, of course).


Lawyers Accuse B.I.G.'s Atty
 We had this how many days ago?
 Yahoo just found out


In a last-ditch attempt before coming to the table to offer a setllement, because they are guilty,
the LA cops "pulled a Coulter" and threw outrageous slander at the family of the greiving family.
At least they didn't use the n-word.

Experts believe the case will be settled in the $60 - 200 million range.


Any entrepreneurs out there?
Any (Koresh forbid) gamblers out there?

I'm thinking about throwing the Party of the Year Decade, but I can't do it alone.

This is so hueueueuge, but they have a "no refunds" policy.
The trick would be to get as many people possible to commit up-front.

We might lose money, but it wouldn't be a lot, because if it's a lot, we won't do it.
But if we can get close, I say let's go for it because we might even make a small profit.
After all, we're not communists (homage to Godfather I)

If you're interested, PayPal $50to and I'll call you.
If you don't have $50 to risk, this deal isn't for you. (We want this to be a surprise, 
so I can't spill the beans to everyone who "might" be interested.)

If you end up declining, you can get a WPE shirt and 6 months of BCR for your $50
(or two t-shirts or BCR CDs or whatever you like) so you don't really have a lot to lose, 
which is the kind of deal this would be in you get involved.


From: Skeet the Monkey

Subject: 2006

Republicans will retain control because they actually work to get their vote out.
Along with a little theft along the way.

I agree with that.

Democrats, like Bartcop sit around get drunk and say aren't we smart.
While doing nothing to get people out to vote.

I admit I often enjoy an after dinner cocktail, but if all I did was "get drunk,"
would I have 1779 issues and 93 radio shows on the web?

As far as "doing nothing," what do you have on the web, Mr. Wise Ass?

Are you saying that Ol' Bart, with an IQ of 64, on a eleven year tequila jag
can out-produce Skeet the Monkey by 1779 percent, plus the 93 radio shows?

Democrats will rip Democrats.

No telling what that bumper sticker, handjobistic shit means, but I'm voting 
Democrat in 2008 and I'm just about the only Democrat on the entire Internet 
willing to say that in public chew on it

And Bartcop will repeat the same tired shit day after day.
 Skeet the Monkey

You might be on to something there.

If Bush commits the same crime five times a week, and five times a week the pink tutu Democrats
stand there with their collective thumbs up their yellow,pansy, bean-eating nancy-asses, sure, 
I might repeat yesterday's advice that they need to wake the fuck up and stop Bush from 
committing the same crimes again.

Der Monkey has been committing crimes for about 1600 days in a row.

You want me to come up with 1600 new and different ways to urge the gelding Democrats
to start to pretend that America is worth saving and to fucking do something to stop him?

Besides attacking webmasters who've spent ten-plus years fighting modern fascism,

...can you remind me what Skeet the Monkey's contribution was again?



There's a group that protests EVERY Saturday in Boca Raton Florida (43 weeks in a row so far). 
Here's a story about it 
Next week I'll send one with my new WPE t-shirt clearly visible

Peace, Mr Clean

Protests turn civil


 Mr. Clean, you rock!


 Iraq pumps 2,000,000 barrels a day,
(and that was before the 2002 Halliburton Upgrade)
 times today's oil price which is $70.82 a barrel
makes $141,640,000 Bush stole justyesterday

...add to that, Iran pumps FOUR M barrels a day.

Once the sick bastard invades, that's 6 M barrels a day
times today's oil price which is  $72.60 a barrel
makes $424,930,000 dollars Bush will steal daily

No wonder they were so eager to start a war


...and what did it cost us?

Not much, just the lives of...

2481....2489 soldiers

Damn, we lost eight yesterday?

Subject: Cruella keeps running

Bart you think Katherine (voting fraud) Harris knows something about stealing the elections...
with the republican owned Diebold ? ES?S electronic voting machines now in place in all 50 states
(thanks to the Republican-written Help America Vote Act (HAVA) in 2002

The problem is, one has to be somewhat close in the polls to make it appear the republican came
from behind and won the race (after midnight I guess that's when all the republican votes seem to come in)...

But Harris is so far back she's going to steal it anyway and make it obvious as hell and the
White House and Karl Rove are afraid people will question the other races the Republicans need
to steal to hold the Republican majority to avoid impeachment ? jail.


Interesting point, but those Diebold machines are programmable,
so can't they just program her to lose a close one?


Donate $24 (or more) and get a 

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Bartcop Flashback

Decades from now, when the history asks,
"Why did America reject Clinton, and embrace the Bush idiot?"

Link 'em this - from  Volume 651,  more than five years ago...
Search the archives, see if anybody else was saying this

When Bill Clinton was president, we had peace.
When Bill Clinton was president, we still had a Bill of Rights.
When Bill Clinton was president, people smiled when they thought about the future.
When Bill Clinton was president, criminal trials were open to the public
When Bill Clinton was president, we worried about his sex life...

You and I knew it more than five years ago.
Now, with 2500 soldiers dead, the American media starts to pick up the scent.


Subject: is the GOP so into "fisting?"

  Click  Here

At the time this was written Wednesday afternoon, Rep. Bill Cadman, R-Colorado Springs,
still hadn't forthrightly apologized for warning a colleague Tuesday on the floor of the House,
"If you try that again, I'll ram my fist up your ass."

 Eddy the pillar

 Eddy, dunno, perhaps the GOP is sexually confused?
 When I mess with a Monkey, I'm always careful to use my boot.



John in Tennessee, I got your call on the BartPhone,
but I don't have a number or e-mail address to reach you.

Contact me, let me get your stuff to you.

If I owe anybody anything, write and tell me.
We don't deposit your check until your order has been processed,
but I have the brain of Goober on a good day so mistakes happen.


 Call the all new, toll-free


 GOP callers Welcome (snicker)

But Not the Big Ones
 by Helen Thomas


Bush has finally admitted that he made a mistake in his Iraqi misadventure. But it's only what he said,
not what he did. Asked what "missteps and mistakes" he regretted about Iraq, Bush replied that his
biggest regret was his use of cowboy language.  Bush told reporters that it was this "kind of tough talk
that sent the wrong signal to people...The troops are being given a refresher course on the rules of war.
Maybe Bush and Blair should bone up on international laws against starting wars in the first place.


Emmy for Kristen Bell?
 If there was a God, she'd win it


Veronica Mars might be the best written show on TV,
but nobody is watching it because it's on UPN/CW.


Thanks to  subscribers.
We know you work hard for your money, so we take it as
a compliment when you throw some our way each month.

 Read the  Previous Issue

 It had everything.

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