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Friday  Jan 5, 2007  Vol 1904 - Ramming & jamming

Quote of the Day

"She's clearly grown up now as our 
  children normally do in these kinds 
  of circumstances." 
    -- Wolf the Whore, using that massive 
        brain of his to deduce that Chelsea 
        Clinton is no longer 12 years old.    Link  

In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Opening our mail 
Vets being Butchered 
Kissyface Party snatch 
Rehnquist the junkie 
Recruiting forgeries
Kerry's malpractice 
Tweety to attack Dems 
Bush fires generals 
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"There is nothing political about finding a policy to end the war, raising the minimum wage, 
  achieving energy independence or helping kids afford college. In fact, politics has prevented 
  progress on these issues for too many years."  
     -- Harry Reid,    Link

Harry, I have some political advice for you: Stop doing interviews!
They profiled Reid on CNN last night and Harry's trying to pull a Kerry.

Nobody wants to hear that you were raised by hookers.
Nobody wants to know how much it cost to get laid when you were a kid.
Nobody wants to see the trailer where your dad shot himself.
Nobody wants to see the top Senate Democrat crying on TV!
Nobody wants to know that you live in the only house in town.
(All the other people who live in Harry's town live in trailers.)

Please, Harry - shut up!
Nobody wants to know!

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Bush bastards opening our mail

Bush has quietly claimed sweeping new powers to open Americans' mail without a judge's warrant.

Bush asserted his new authority when he signed a postal reform bill into law on Dec. 20.
Bush then issued a "signing statement" that declared his right to open people's mail.
That claim is contrary to existing law and contradicted the bill he had just signed, say experts.

Bush's move caught Capitol Hill by surprise.

"Despite the President's statement, the new postal law prohibits the government from snooping into
people's mail without a warrant," said Rep. Henry Waxman (D-Sheriff), who co-sponsored the bill.

Bush is testing the Democrats because every time in the past he's tested them, they've folded.
For the last six years, anytime Bush broke the law the Democrats would meekly ask him to
stop and Bush would bark, "I'm the President and we're at war," and the Democrats
would wet themselves in fear and beg forgiveness and crawl under a table and cry.

Bush wants to know if the 2006 elections changed anything and this is Test #1.

If the Democrats stand up to him BIG time on this, maybe he'll get the message. But if they 
continue to play the whipped dog, Bush will run right over them, which is against the will of 
70 percent of the voters. All this time, the Democrats have been too scared to say or do anything

- but do the Democrats know they have power now?

The other thing they need to do is warn Bush that he WILL be impeached if he pardons anybody 
before a trial that lays out what crimes were committed, and by whom and known by whom.

Othewise Bush will pardon all his thugs for crimes such as rape, murder, torture, the unnecessary
deaths of 3000-5000 soldiers for no reason, not to mention the theft of the entire Treasury 
(plus decades of loans to repay) and the Democrats will say, "We're shocked that the 
president would take such warrantless action, yada, yada, yada."

The reason I bring this up so often is because it's going to happen and when it does,
I don't want to work hard to find the issue where I predicted it.

If they would publicly warn Bush up-front, it would make a difference.
That way, nobody could say we were impeaching for no reason.

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Used with permission


"I have reached the tentative conclusion that maybe even Cheney believes Iraq is lost. 
  They have no answer to deal with how badly they have screwed it up. Therefore, the best 
  thing to do is keep it from totally collapsing on your watch and hand it off to the next guy
   -- literally, not figuratively."  
    --  Joe Biden,    Link

Hey Joe, I have an idea - why don't you say, "That's unacceptable!" to them?

How many thousands more soldiers will be maimed or lose their lives in the next 750 days
because Bush wants to pretend he's saving face and you're too cowardly to call him on it?

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Vets being Butchered

The Veterans Admin. reports more than 150,000 Iraq vets are receiving disability benefits.
Dr. Imbascini returned from Germany, where he treated the worst of the U.S. war wounded.
He said that an extremely high number of wounded soldiers are coming home with their arms
or legs amputated.  Imbascini said he amputated the genitals of one or two men every day.

"I walk into the OR and the surgeons are doing their work and there a Navy SEAL. And he's missing
both legs below the knee, one arm is blown off, he's got incisions on his thighs to relieve the pressure
on the parts of the legs that hopefully will survive and there's genital injuries, and you just want to cry."

So, 150,000 disabled vets of Bush's bloody quagmire and he wants to send 20,000 more?

Question: Why doesn't the right care enough to speak out?
If it's necessary for these men to lose eyes, arms, legs and genitals
then it's not as big of a tragedy if they lost them for no reason, right?

Why do Republicans put loyalty to Bush over loyalty to these troops?

Someday, they'll name an aircraft carrier after this spolied little boy,
and the men missing arms and legs and eyes and genitals will stand in
the rain for hours just to get a glimps of the "war hero president" who
took their limbs for no reason at all - why is that?

...and if the president doesn't care,
and if the congress doesn't care,
and if the "surge" Republicans don't care,
and if the bastards in the whore media don't care,
and if the military families don't care, ...should we?

I'm just asking a question - who can answer it?

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Kissyface Party Now in Hands of Critic

The party Joe Lieberman created to mount his independent re-election campaign has been seized 
by one of his critics, and the secretary of state's office said Wednesday that it won't challenge the takeover.

After the senator's Nov. 7 victory under the Connecticut for Lieberman Party banner, John Orman 
switched his party affiliation from Democrat to Connecticut for Lieberman and voted himself chairman.

Orman, who ran briefly against Lieberman last year, said only critics, bloggers and anyone named 
Lieberman can join the party, which he said would be a watchdog of the senator's actions.


 ha ha

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Subject:  dinosaurs and Bill Hicks


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Subject: Republicans Under Estimate Nancy Pelosi

Republicans who under estimate Nancy Pelosi do so at their own peril. 
Nancy is a lot sharper than your average Democrat and she is only in politics 
for one reason, to make America a better place. 

She is independently wealthy and doesn't have any favors that she has to repay. 
She is a true public servant. I especially like it that her first order of business
was to put Congress back on a 5 day work week. 

Unlike the last Congress they won't get to sit around and do nothing. 
Go Nancy go!

Marc Perkel
San Bruno, CA

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 Hijacking Catastrophe: 9/11, Fear & the Selling of American Empire

Rehnquist - Crazy on the junk
 His Placidyl monkey made him hallucinate


An out-on-control physician at the U.S. Capitol prescribed a powerful sleep aid for
William Rehnquist (R-Penzance) for nearly a decade while he was an associate justice.

The records present a picture of a justice with chronic back pain who for many months
took three times the recommended dosage of the drug Placidyl and then went into
withdrawal in 1981 when he abruptly stopped taking it.

Rehnquist checked himself into the hospital, where he tried to escape in his pajamas
and imagined that the CIA was plotting against him, the records indicate.

Maybe he wasn't so crazy, after all.

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Subject: broken femur

Bart, about 10 years ago I had a commander who landed in a tree on a night parachute jump.
He cut himself down. Fell about 50 feet. Broke his femur (compound fracture) and his arm.

He had a cast on his arm but just a thigh high velcro type brace on his leg.
He spent two or three days in the hospital.

Well, then, my bodycast story is going to be funnier than I thought :)

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Subject: coffin photos?

I'm more concerned about the paraplegics, the quadriplegics, those with closed brain injuries,
and the hundreds of thousands that will suffer complex PTSD, a new version of the same old PTSD,
only enhanced by multiple rotations through a war zone.

Those living with the after effects of Bush's personal war will be among us for many, many years.

Do you think the Republicans will do what is right for our veterans?
I don't.

They don't give a damn about our military men and women when they return home wounded.

I'd like to recommend a good book - "What Was Asked of Us - An Oral History
of the Iraq War by the Soldiers Who Fought It", by Trish Wood.

     Click  to  Order

It's a tough read, but worth it.
 Palmetto Yankee

PY, you saw this sentence on today's page:
The Veterans Admin. reports more than 150,000 Iraq vets are receiving disability benefits.

This isn't some Johns Hopkins study Bush can label, "an opinion."
This is the Veterans administration saying 150,000 Iraq vets are receiving disability benefits.

And the brain-dead Republicans want to send more troops?

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Tweety to attack Dems
 He's the king of GOP softball questions

Chris Matthews fancies himself a tough interrogator. This of course is the delusion Matthews lives in, 
but it makes for great copy. I have written many an article pointing out the clear double standard 
Matthews works by; asking the tough questions to those on the left while excusing those on the right. 
During the Jack Abramoff scandal, it was even revealed that Matthews had ties to the disgraced lobbyist. 
Nonetheless, Matthews goes out each night and pretends to play hardball and tonight he showed us a 
vision into the possible talking points that will be used against Democrats between now and 2008 to 
help the GOP continue to occupy the White House.

"Got 20 bucks?"

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"All of the tortured, twisted rationales for this war -- all of the fatuous intellectual 
  pyrotechnics dreamed up to justify it -- have vaporized, and we're left with just the 
  mad, mindless, meaningless and apparently endless slaughter...If politicians here at 
  home had the courage of the troops in the field, we could begin saving lives rather than
  watching helplessly as Bush continues to sacrifice them. Three thousand plus is enough."  
    --Bob Herbert,   Link

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Bush fires anti-surge generals


Bush is putting the finishing touches on his new Iraq plan, reshuffling his national security team 
firing any general who tells him his plan is suicide for the surge troops. 

The president plans to replace his two top generals in Iraq. 
Defense officials said they expected the appointments to be announced later Friday.
Bush next week will unveil his strategy, which is expected to entail massive casualties.

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 Want to trade links?

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Open threads - anybody got anything they want to say?

Randy H knew that John Munch arrested Lewis Black in Baltimore in 1997
so he wins the last pound of South's Finest Chocolate for 2006.

(Randy, send me your address)

Special thanks to South's Finest Chocolate, the tastiest chocolate ever!

Add your comments to today's page

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"All our best to Governor Schwarzenegger. He broke his leg while skiing in Idaho. 
  He tried to act like it didn't hurt, but everybody knows he can't act." 
    -- Jay Leno


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Recruiting with forgeries

A new chapter is unfolding in the saga of a local couple, who went AWOL from the Army
more than two months ago and are now considered deserters and, in fact, fugitives.
It appears that the Army may now being investigating the person who signed them up.

"We wanted [extra] time to button up our personal lives."

The recruiter, eager to enlist them, said no problem and allegedly created a document that
qualified the couple for the Army's delayed entry program.  A document, which they initially
had no idea existed, and which appears to verify them as students enrolled in Finger Lakes
Community College, thus entitling them to delayed entry.

"It's in our file, yeah."

One problem.

"Yeah, we never attended FLCC."

"That's a complete forgery."

If they have time, maybe the Democrats make it illegal for a recruiter to lie
when he's trying to get some young stupes to sign up for a lifetime of hell.

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The GOP hates immigrants

I don't know if his numbers are right or not,
but I know he's lying about the rest,
so logic tells me not to trust him.

...well, that and he's a Republican.

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"People are executed all over the world, but [haning Saddam] on the first day of Eid al-Adha 
  was unthinkable. I didn't believe it was happening. Why did they have to hurry? Why hang him 
  when people are reciting their holiday prayers? The pictures of that were revolting and barbaric."  
    -- Egypt's Mubarak, on Bush's bloodthirsty stupidity,   Link 

That's our Bush - bloodthirsty and stupid - and don't forget greedy and childish.

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Subject: Beating dead climbers


Sorry Bart, you're wrong on this one.  I've climbed for 40 years...

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Marty's Entertainment Page

always has good stuff.

Click on the E!

Spiders on drugs

Subject: Where did Smudge Report go?

Hi Bart,

Whatever happened to the Smudge Report?
It's been offline for a while now and I haven't been
able to find any news about why it's down....

This link still appears on Yahoo's "Drudge Report" parodies directory:

but it's broken.

Keep up the good work,
 Ron N

Damn, did we lose Smudge, too?
That available donation dollar is getting smaller every month.

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 Iraq pumped 3.5M barrels daily before Bush invaded
 and then they got their 2003 Halliburton upgrade

Bush's oil gouge, which is going to $100 a barrel
makes $350,000,000 Bush will steal every day.

No wonder they were so eager to start a war,

stealing  $350,000,000 every day.

It's the biggest theft in Earth's history.

Exxon made $10B profit in 90 days
 $100M a day - all profit - because Bush started a fake war


Bush's "Bring 'em on" death taunt is up to...

3,005....3,006 American victims

Another soldier killed while Bush pretends he's listening to all sides
when we all know he made up his mind months ago - SURGE!

How many thousands more will die in
the upcoming McCain Iraqi surge?

How many thousands more will die in
the upcoming McCain Iranian surge?

Will Bloomberg be their last, best hope after
McCain pisses away his chance to make history?

...and don't worry about BIG OIL.
Exxon makes $100M every day

Bush has killed more than 3,000 soldiers.

Do I hear 4,000?

Random thought...

When the BFEE subway train was about to run down the US Constitution,
no elected Democrat had the courage to jump on the Constitution and save it 
from the certain death of George W Bush was determined to bring it..

Will they let him push them around again in 2007?

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McAuliffe blasts Kerry


Former Democratic boss Terry McAuliffe blasting John Kerry's monsterously bungled 2004 campaign, 
calling it "one of the biggest acts of political malpractice in the history of American politics." 

Can't argue with that.

McAuliffe said Kerry's camp was so afraid of offending swing voters that it didn't defend his record 
or criticize Bush. He said he was muzzled by Kerry's aides from assailing Bush's military record.

Can't argue with that.

He said Kerry ordered speeches at convention to be scrubbed of any mention of Bush's name or his record.

That's one of the biggest political boneheaded blunders of the last 40 years and he could've 
avoided it if only he had read him some  But nooooo, Kerry wanted to lose

"I thought the decision of the Kerry campaign to back off any real criticism of Bush was one of the 
biggest acts of political malpractice in the history of American politics," he said.

Can't argue with that.

Meanwhile, Republicans went on a sharp tirade against Kerry at their convention.

Stupid, stupid, stupid - John, how could you?
You didn't even mention this at the convention.

   "I'm going after bin Laden!"

Clearly, Kerry wanted to lose with all his heart.

But when Bush said in an interview on the first day that he didn't think the U.S. could
win the war on terror, Kerry did not respond. The Massachusetts senator was 
windsurfing off Nantucket, unaware of the president's comments.

Well of course!
Why attack when your opponent screws-up BIG time?

McAuliffe said Kerry later told him that was one of the biggest mistakes of his campaign. 
"I should have gotten off the island," McAuliffe quotes Kerry as saying.

Ya think?

John, nobody can be that stupid accidentally.
You lost to Bush, the stupidest, most crooked politician in American history during an
unpopular war that you were both for and against - John how could you?

If we could just get the Democrats to nominate someone with ambition, someone who wanted to win,
some who was driven by a desire to help the country instead of rape it, someone driven by payback.

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"They said nice things about Reagan after he died, too.
  It's as if the only good Republican is a dead Republican."  
     -- Glenn Reynolds,    Link  

 Glad I didn't say that...

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Subject: Mallard the unfunny duck

The quote supposedly said by the arresting officer:

> "That's not a comic strip, that's a piece of shit..."

is something a poster made up on the Comics Journal Message Board.
You are presenting it like it was actually said at the time.  Funny, but not true.
 Richard B.

I didn't know it was fake.
I don't have time to check anything - that's why I provide the links.

What the cops allegedly said sure sounded reasonable to me :)

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Vanessa Marcil on 'Las Vegas'


 See more of her at BC Hotties  (15 new pages)

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Garbage to reunite January 31 in LA for cancer benefit

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