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WELCOME TO BARTCOP.COM A modem, a smart mouth and the truthNews and Commentary NOT Approved by Karl Rove, bcause vicious extremists can NOT be appeased.


Tuesday  Feb 5, 2013    Vol 3010 - Prospect

...and they say we can't afford Medicare.

In Today's Tequila Treehouse...

Arrow Rove's War with Teabaggers
2013 Political Animal Awards
Pot Calms Boy's Austism Rage
Arrow Trump - Bigger dick than ever
Arrow Orchid named after Der Monkey
Arrow Amazon Helps Tequila Treehouse
Arrow  Bad Teacher  Cameron Diaz



"NRA: Freeways don't need 'lanes.' Criminals aren't going to stay in them anyway."
    --  LOLGOP

  Send e-mail to Bart

Rove's War with Teabaggers
I love a Let's-you-and-him fight

Karl Rove is backing a new effort to stop the Tea Party in its tracks.
The Teabaggers are not pleased.
The New York Times reported that Rove's super PAC American Crossroads will enlist
big-money GOP donors to fight back against Tea Party groups that are looking to oust
Republican establishment candidates in the 2014 primaries. The idea is to prevent any more
Todd Akins or Richard Mourdocks from making it through to the national stage.

What's wrong with Todd Akin and Richard Mourdocks?
They are true-blue conservative handjobs - just what you guys love.
The right met this news with a combination of outrage and mockery. Ben Shapiro of
kicked things off by writing, "If Tea Party candidates lose, it's because they weren't good candidates;
if GOP establishment candidates lose, it's because they weren't good conservatives. The choice for
actual conservatives should be easy."
"I dare say any candidate who gets this group's support should be targeted for destruction
by the conservative movement," wrote Erick Erickson on

I think a vigorously-fought civil war is what the GOP needs right now.
Let the crazies fight the super-crazies and may the biggest losers win.

  Send e-mail to Bart

Shop Online  sells  everything

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then come back here
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and they'll throw the Treehouse some pennies...

Amazon business has been slower than usual.
I hope things pick up between now and Christmas
because Amazon has become my financial lifeline.

Extra thanks to those of you who
use the Amazon Portal.

Someone bought 3 Hitec Mighty Karbonite Feather Micro Servos
for $57 (cheap!) so Amazon donated $2.40 to the Treehouse! 

I think everyone needs 3 mini-helicopter motors.

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Midnight - 3 AM

Thousands of people died waiting for Bush Bastard Brownie
to do his damn job and he now thinks Superdome jokes are funny?

2013 Political Animal Awards
  by Will Durst

And the winner is... Mitch the Bitch McConnell.
BEST DIRECTION OF A COMEDY: To Mitt Romney's campaign manager, Matt Rhoades.
Hugo Chavez, Fidel Castro and Bashar al-Assad.

No, Asaad should "win" that all by himself.
THE YOU CAN GO HOME AGAIN AWARD: To Sarah Palin, Fox News' gain is Alaska's loss.

  Send e-mail to Bart

Subject: Boy Scouts and Religion

Although it is commendable that the Boy Scouts are going to stop prohibiting gay scouts
I'm not hearing them say anything about changing their position when it come to excluding
boys based on their religious beliefs. The Boy Scouts require scouts believe in God and
excludes boys who don't share their particular religious views.

There are a growing number of boys who are part of the reality based community who are
uncomfortable being required to acknowledge a belief in something that isn't real. Furthermore
in the believing community boys are uncomfortable with a flavor of religion that is different from
their own. Jewish, Buddhist, Hindu, and Muslim children are uncomfortable with the Boy Scouts
pushing a Jesus based religion on them.

Boy Scouts are supposed to be teaching life skills to boys and a set of skills and values that
would apply to any boy of any religion. If the Boy Scouts don't want to do that then they should
just call themselves the Christian Boy Scouts. It seems to me that the time has come to decide if
they are going to be inclusive or exclusive and if they are going to be inclusive then they should
include boys from the doubt-based world and focus on universal ethics, camping, and tying knots.

Things that all boys should know regardless of sexual orientation
or what invisible people they do or do not worship.
  Marc Perkel

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Pot Calms Boy's Austism Rage
Alex Echols got a script and it helped

Heartbroken and desperate, an Oregon family has turned to medical marijuana to help manage
their son's self-destructive rages. They say the treatment, which has sparked controversy, has
helped their severely autistic child like nothing else

Dad Jeremy Echols explains that Alex often exhibits extreme, self-destructive behavior,
such as slamming his head into walls and slapping his face until it bleeds.

"Alex had every family of behavior medication known to the psychiatrist, and we tried private
behavior therapy," says Alex's mom Karen. "We tried a lot of stuff before the group home."

Then, in 2009, Alex's mom read about medical marijuana treatments for children with autism a
nd rage. Interest piqued, the family decided to try it.  The boy's transformation was astounding.

"Eventually we had some truly amazing results," said Alex's dad. "He explored his world with his
hands, something he was very rarely able to do. His hands were the enemy up to this point but when
we got the dosing right, he played. He used his hands to explore. He looked at us and smiled."

Yeah, pot has that effect of most people.

But Republicans HATE to see someone else happy, so they f-ing hate pot.

And the religiously-insane were told by the prophets who talk directly to God

that God HATES the miracle drug he gave us, so it became outlawed.

Think how great America could be if we moved away from religious insanity
and gave the medical scientists the go-ahead to cure some of our problems.

BTW, if you live in a state that doesn't allow cheap and
natural medicine, Obama has a message for you:

"That's too bad - life isn't fair."

"Eric, raid some more pot stores..."

  Send e-mail to Bart

Trump - Bigger dick than ever
He's making noise about suing Bill Maher


Donald Trump won't let the joke go.

Trump said he plans to sue Bill Maher over a joke Maher made last month on Jay Leno.

Maher joked he would donate $5 million to the charity of Trump’s choice if Trump could prove
he's not the "spawn of his mother having sex with an orangutan"—mocking Trump's much-publicized
dickness over Obama's birth certofocate. Through his lawyer, Trump fired off a copy of his birth
certificate to Maher along with a letter demanding the money.

“He promised me $5 million for charity if I provided certain information," Trump said Monday.
"Well, I provided the information, he didn’t pay. So today I sue Bill Maher for $5 million for charity.”

Butt Donald, you were challenged to prove your Mom didn't bang an orangutan.

You haven't done that.

And funny how you'd want to drag that image of your mother and the ape
having hot monkey sex into the media circus for people like me to make fun of...

You're like, ...weird.

  Send e-mail to Bart

Today's Sarah Palin Nude Photo


  Send e-mail to Bart

Subject: The NRA has changed


Back in the late 70s, I was a proud member of the NRA, which was the best supporter of gun safety. 
I took NRA courses until I was certified as a safety instructor for rifles, pistols, and shotguns. 

Now, not only have they stopped supporting gun safety, they have moved from representing gun
owners to representing gun sellers.  To top it off, they have elected Wayne LaPierre as their spokesman. 
Leaving aside his French name--how did that get past conservatives?--he seems to be a total idiot. 
His most recent statement is that, even though no one has any apparent intent to "track law-abiding citizens,"
that is what the gun control proposals really want to do.  He said, "And law-abiding people don’t want that
[being tracked by the government]. My God, that’s the last thing they want."

If he's so worried about that, why doesn't he fight the PATRIOT act? 
Tracking law-abiding citizens is something all true conservatives seem to love!


 Send e-mail to Bart

Pop TV Quiz

On Person of Interest, how did Reese's dog (Bear) get his name?

He "ate" (chewed up, really) the millions of dollars of bearer's bonds
he was supposed to be guarding while left alone in a a car.

Send e-mail to Bart

Orchid named after George W Bush

This is the rare Monkey Orchid, found only in high elevations of Ecuador and Peru.

The primate-esque flowers are formally known as Dracula simia
but most people \just call them Der Monkey Orchids.

 Send e-mail to Bart

Marty's Entertainment Page
has new stuff
every day

Marty's TV Listings are the best!

Marty always has good stuff.

Click on the E!

Bartcop's Computer Repair
We can fix your computer

We do the repairs magically, over the Net.

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Get updates when a new issue goes up.

It's Stranger Mystery Car Week


The cars this week are all weird, weird cars from weird places.
If you get close, we'll call it a win.

 Subject: last issue's Mystery Car    Link

Bart, that's a 1964 registered Peel three wheeler.
It had a 49cc two stroke engine and was made on the
Isle of Man in the Irish Sea. Peel is the capital of the iland.

  Send e-mail to Bart

Know Your Classics


 Subject: last issue's Classic    Link

Bart, that is the opening line from Stephen King’s classic “The Shining”.
Of note is that this last week King interviewed said that he is working on
a sequel which will focus on what Danny “Redrum” is up to these days.
  Charlie Ray

 Send Classic Lines to Bart

Today's Don't Look Down Picture


 Send e-mail to Bart

Subject: NRA "Roach Motel"

We build hundreds of non-descript, windowless, soundproof, but bulletproof buildings
all throughout the red states.  Put big signs out front calling them "strip clubs.".
As a promotional event, advertise free drinks and lap dances to anyone who supports
the right to carry a concealed weapon.  If your carrying, you get in FREE.

Let everyone enjoy some dances and get sufficiently drunk.  Then, while the dancers are
changing shifts (we can use them again and again), kill the lights, turn on the strobes, play a
tape of the sound of gunfire and shouts of "He's got a gun!" and stand back until the
indiscriminant shooting is over.  Repeat as necessary until the NRA is a dim memory.   ha ha

For you doubters who say this will only work one time, as someone who grew up in Appalachia,
I will bet you $1000 I could repeat this at least five times in West Virginia before any of the
"roaches" catch on, and at least ten times in Kentucky.  Remember, Kentucky is the state
that elected a senator whose ONLY qualification was the fact that his father is ALSO an idiot.

The result?
We'd have a Democratic supermajority in all 50 states
until we all move in to Gingrich's moon base.


 Send e-mail to Bart

Know your Supermodels


 Subject: Last issue's supermodel     Link

That guy was looking at nude pictures of Miranda Kerr! 
Can’t blame the guy for checking that out.
  Mark the Dentist

  Send e-mail to Bart

Today's Wildlife Photo




  Send e-mail to Bart

 Subject: sexy and tasteful

I just saw your sexy and tasteful photo of Ashley Judd and I think I just voted a little bit.

 Subject: Ashley Judd

Hey Bart,
Just a quick correction: the jersey Ashley Judd wore was from the U of K HOCKEY team.
Hockey already gets the ghetto treatment as a sport, give it credit where it’s due.

  Send e-mail to Bart

Today's Mystery Celebrity Photo 


 Subject: last issue's Mystery Celebrity    Link

Bart, that’s Elton John, Lady Gaga and Sting.
  Mark with no last name

Mark, so far, you're the only one who got that - I'm surprised.
Peter Y got it, too.

  Send e-mail to Bart

Going to Alaska

Mrs Bart has always wanted to go to Alaska and Hawaii.
Thanks to Scott H (Don HO) we got to Hawaii in 2005 and we thought we'd
better go to Alaska before I have to drag an oxygen tank behind my wheelchair.

We bought tickets last year but we kept running into reasons why we couldn't go so
we're trying once again to go - and we're Alaska newbies. Astrocat says March is the

best month for aurora viewing and the weather isn't always freezing - hopefully.

I heard Alaska had something called Matanuska Valley Thuderfuck
but I'm a journalist so I can't say it exists because I've never seen any.

Any Bartcop readers in or near Anchorage?

BTW, this is the Astrocat photo Mrs Bart saw on last March that
made her say, "We have to go..."  
It might have been labled "Antigan Pass?"

For me, it was this Astrocat photo.

Astrocat - where are these places?   
  Send e-mail to Bart

And some thing new we're trying:
Would you like to sponsor a portion of the trip?
Maybe a tank of gas or a few dollars towards a hotel or a ferry ride or something?
That would get your name in the sure-to-be-fun Alaska Trip Report.

"And the fourth night we stayed at Chena Hot Springs in Fairbanks
  thanks to Greg and Fran and Ducks," type of thing.

Be in Bart's Alaska Trip Report

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Today's Mystery City



Subject: last issue's Mystery City    

Bart – it's London, after the bombing during WW2.

That's St Paul Cathedral in the center.

Send e-mail to Bart

What is today's History Mystery?   


Subject: last issue's History Mystery    Link 

Bart, I recognized that schoolboy right away.
That’s Ah-nold Schwarzenegger, the Terminator.


 Send e-mail to Bart

Subject: donation

Thanks to Clare in Kimberley, BC

Humor can get us thru the worst of times so we will keep on.  
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Please remember the Bartcop Portal when you shop online.

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 Bad Teacher  Cameron Diaz

Check out  over 1000 sexy and tasteful photos of  Cameron Diaz

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Thanks to Blue in Seattle for helping me corral the hotties...

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