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Thurs-Friday, March 28-29, 2013    Vol 3035 - Pimp my Right

In Today's Tequila Treehouse...

Arrow Ten Senate Dems vs Gays
Pub Ho Declares Independence
Why the GOP Can't Change
Arrow Right wants Leno to Stay
Arrow Tennessee's Sharia Scare
Arrow Amazon Helps Tequila Treehouse
Arrow Pan Am's Christina Ricci


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"Some day, historians are going to look back on the 2012
 GOP presidential campaign and think that we made it all up."

       --  LOLGOP in a Tweet

  Send e-mail to Bart

Ten Senate Dems vs Gays
Why can't they act like forward-thinkers?

                                                      Graphic via HuffPo


The anti-gay holdouts are:
1. Sen. Bob Casey (D-Pa.)
 2. Sen. Joe Manchin (D-W.Va.), who’s a neanderthal and proud of it.
 3. Sen. Kay Hagan (D-N.C.)
 4. Sen. Bill Nelson (D-Fla.)
 5. Sen. Heidi Heitkamp (D-N.D.), who’s also been a major disappointment on gun issues (she’s uber pro-NRA).
 6. Sen. Mary Landrieu (D-La.), who’s often on the wrong side.
 7. Sen. Tom Carper (D-Del.)
 8. Sen. Tim Johnson (D-S.D.)
 9. Sen. Joe Donnelly (D-Ind.)
 10. Sen. Mark Pryor (D-Ark.)

They need to work this out like they always work shit out:
Find out how many votes you need to get it passed and the rest can play Caveman.

Just get it done.

  Send e-mail to Bart

Pub Ho Declares Independence
If I was in the GOP I'd do the same thing


Sarah Palin wants to pump it back up after debuting the new prop comedy act she did at CPAC.
SarahPAC — Palin’s “official” PAC — has released its first video of the 2014 election cycle —
Loaded for Bear. And yes, it does feature an actual bear roaring.
Palin’s endorsements from the massive wave election that saw the party take back the House are
highlighted — after they explain how important Palin is, Senator Ted Cruz (R-Cunty) appears,
saying The Quitter is “fearless… principled” and “she can pick winners.” The winners are then listed
in order of their appeal to the far right: Rand Paul is first, then Rubio, Tim Scott (R-SC), Pat Toomey
(R-PA), Governor Nikki Haley (R-SC) and on.
Of course, Sharron Angle, Christine O’Donnell and Joe Miller — candidates Palin endorsed who lost
— are not even mentioned.

 Send e-mail to Bart

 Subject: how to avoid a kidnapping

Hi Bart
While I was at university 40 years ago we (not personally) were plagued by a rapist
preying on students. He had a record of eight when he pushed the wrong woman into her car. 
He forced her beneath the dashboard while he headed to his raping grounds above campus. 
While turning a hard right while still in the middle of town, she hooked her arm up through
the wheel and her other hand hard on his accelerator foot.  Unable to correct hey screamed
around in a half circle till the car hit a tree where she jumped out yelling "rapist". 

He barely cleared the door before everybody in the intersection was on him. 
I think California gave him 99 years.
A separate tip.  I have always told women that if they feel seriously threatened by someone
behind them to drop and slide under the nearest parked car--hang on and start screaming. 
It is very hard to try to get a resisting person out from under a car if he/she doesn't want to 'cooperate'.
 Peter in NZ

  Send e-mail to Bart

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Why the GOP Can't Change
That "funny math" drives them crazy

RNC's Reince Prettyboy acknowledged Friday that some of the recommendations
from the GOP “autopsy” report released earlier this week may not be implemented.

To change the party’s official rules requires support from 75 percent of its 168 elected members.

“I know how complicated it is to get 75 percent of the RNC to agree to any changes,” he said.
“If you take it too far, you’re ultimately going to be doomed.”

There you go.
The party that hates women, Blacks, Browns and Yellows and the poor, the sick and the old,
can't change direction half as fast as the Titanic could and look what happened to those poor bastards.

As long as the GOP is chasing after women with this in their hands...

...they're going to lose with America's biggest voting block and Reince Prettyboy
says they won't be changing their platform any time soon - works for me.

  Send e-mail to Bart

 Subject: Kelsey Grammer

Dear Bart:
Grammer reminds me of Laura Bush.  They both got into trouble with the law. 
Laura Bush ran a stop sign in order to murder an ex-boyfriend, and Grammer got busted for cocaine. 
In both cases, they got in bed with the Bushes and their legal problems disappeared.
Warm regards,
  Jim W

Poor Kelsey Grammer - all those hundreds of millions of dollars
and he can't buy love or respect or anything with it.

  Send e-mail to Bart

Sirius XM 

Weeknights at 9 PM Eastern/Pacific

Right wants Leno to Stay
Make him the next Dennis Miller for all I care...


Could Jay Leno become a new conservative hero?
In the bitter and gossipy duel between Leno and NBC (they're firing him),
some see political fallout in Leno’s fall from grace.
“The Left's cheering of Leno's exit is typical, he dared to entertain and offer jokes
for the other 50% of country. Unacceptable in ‘New America’…” tweeted Matt Drudge.

And Jezebel touched on Leno’s rough relationship with the coastal elites,
describing him as “Middle America’s favorite late-night host.”
Fox News’ “The Five” speculated, if slightly in jest as is the show’s wont,
that Leno was suffering for his barbs against Obama.

Leno isn't funny - that's his crime.
If anything, he's middle-aged America's favorite host.

He sold out so much he became The Man and The Man just isn't funny.

  Send e-mail to Bart

 Subject: Texas Cavity Search

Angel Dobbs, 38, and her niece, Ashley Dobbs, 24, said the search occurred on
State Highway 161 in or near Irving on the night of July 13. They claim that a female
trooper, Kelly Helleson, used her fingers to search their anuses and vaginas  — using
the same latex glove — while on the side of the road in full view of passing vehicles.   Link

  Send e-mail to Bart

Tennessee Gripped by Sharia Scare
No forced Sharia worshipping here, they say


A few Tennessee lawmakers apparently inquired whether a new sink at the state capitol
designed for custodial use was a sink for Muslims to wash their feet in before prayer.
The lawmakers were reassured that it is simply a "mop sink."

I don't know... that looks like a holy Sharia foot sink to me...

“I confirmed with the facility administrator that the floor-level sink installed in the
men’s restroom outside the House Chamber is for housekeeping use,” Director Connie
Ridley wrote in an email. “It is, in layman’s terms, a mop sink.”
Tthe sink is designed to make it easier for custodial staff to clean mops and fill buckets.
Damn, that was a close call.

 Send e-mail to Bart

Liquid Drop Art

 Send e-mail to Bart


"We must remember that lesson, for we were founded as a nation of openness to
  people of all beliefs. And so we must remain. Our very unity has been strengthened
  by our pluralism. We establish no religion in this country, we command no worship,
  we mandate no belief, nor will we ever. Church and state are, and must remain, separate".
      --  radical Leftist Ronald Reagan, 1984      Link

  Send e-mail to Bart

Marty's Entertainment Page
has new stuff
every day

Marty's TV Listings are the best!

Marty always has good stuff.

Click on the E!

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Get updates when a new issue goes up.

Know Your Classics


 Subject: last issue's Classic    Link

Bart, that is the opening line of The Odyssey by Homer.
I had to read it for a college literature class.  The class was taught by a radical
feminist professor, who told us that to think of Odysseus as a modern Captain Kirk,
traveling from island to island (instead of planets), getting every piece of tail that he can
before he returns home to his wife and family.
 Sue in Michigan

A couple of TV notes:

The most recent Law & Order SUV was about "legitimate rape."
This lady was raped by her stalker and then she found out she was pregnant.
She took the rapist to trial but they voted "Not Guilty" because there was a Teabagger
on the jury who bought the Todd Aikin line that, if it was "real" rape, there's no way
she would've gotten pregnant since the female body "shuts down" in those cases.

Scary stuff, allowing ignorant Teabaggers on a f-ing jury.

Less scary was the Sopranos repeat, where they found out Vito (fat guy) was gay.
He was Tony's top earner, putting in $3000-4000 a week into Tony's pocket.
Tony had to decide if he wanted that extra $200K a year or kill the gay guy.
In the end, he let someone else kill Vito, his top earner, to avoid a costly mob war.

That epsiode aired in 2006.
In 2014, if they found out Vito was gay, would Tony take the extra $200K per year?


 Send Classic Lines to Bart

Today's Scary Don't Look Down Picture


 Send e-mail to Bart

 Subject: social security

Bart, love your website
I’m hoping you will hammer former cat food commission member dick [little friskes] durbin ,
who thinks it’s ok to cut social security insurance by 22%.

If you discount women members of the democratic caucus, 90% of the male democrats,
could not fill a ball sac among themselves unless Hillary Clinton lent them one.

THEY ARE SPINELESS.[as well as paid for] 10% progressives can not get much done by themselves.
This not an endorsement for Hillary Clinton as I don’t trust her either. THANK YOU for letting me rant.

  Send e-mail to Bart

Please Include Attribution to With This Graphic
What do we Know Infographic

Know your Supermodels


 Subject: Last issue's supermodel     Link

Bart, that supermodel is Eva Padburg.
  Bronco-fan Steve in Seattle

  Send e-mail to Bart

Today's Wildlife Photo



Send e-mail to Bart

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Today's Mystery Celebrity Photo 


 Subject: last issue's Mystery Celebrity    Link

I think that’s a young Pat Benatar - am I right?

  Send e-mail to Bart

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Today's Mystery City


Subject: last issue's Mystery City    

Bart, that's city is Damascus, Syria. It won't look much different after
the US and US backed aid to the rebels from Al Queda succeeds.
mark with no last name

US-backed aid from al Qaeda?

Send e-mail to Bart

Name the Mystery Car


 Subject: last issue's Mystery Car    Link

Bart, that is a 1960 Dodge Dart Phoenix.  (We had a '61).
Bruce in NM

Bart, that's a 1960 Dodge Pioneer. Hammer on
Allan K

Actually, it's a 1960 Dodge Dart Pioneer so let's say you both won.

  Send e-mail to Bart

What is today's History Mystery?   


Subject: last issue's History Mystery    Link 

Bart, that's a Russian Myasishchev VM-T transport plane with an oversize cargo pod mounted on it. 
The VM-T was based on the M-4 Bison bomber and first flew in 1981.  The one in your picture is
painted in civilian Aeroflot colors.  One of the main missions of the VM-T was to ferry Energiya
rocket motors into the Baikonur Cosomodrome.  The Russians also mounted their version of the
space shuttle, the Buran, on the backs of these aircraft.

 Send e-mail to Bart

Subject: donation

Bart, here's a donation from a kindred spirit
  Harry M in Hollywood, FL

Harry, that was nice - thanks.

Humor can get us thru the worst of times so we will keep on.  
As my buddy Ray Coleman used to say, "Never quit!!" seems to be my best bet to stay on the Tubes
if you shop with them, you might even save some money.

Please remember the Bartcop Portal when you shop online.

It never hurts to check prices.

Pan Am's Christina Ricci

  Check out  over 1900 sexy and tasteful photos of Christina Ricci

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Thanks to Blue in Seattle for helping me corral the hotties...

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