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Quote of the Day
"The president is raising $200 million from
He's talking like a guy who could get my vote.
"Many of us who opposed the war in Iraq did
so because, we argued at the time,
Iraq was successfully contained and therefore no threat to America and that a war
over there would distract us from greater dangers posed by al Qaeda, North Korea
and Iran. Six months later -- six months after toppling Saddam Hussein, that is, it's
obvious that we were right. If the goal of President Bush's foreign policy was to make
America weaker, more vulnerable and more hated, mission accomplished."
--Paul Begala, Attribution
The forces opposing the U.S.-led military coalition in Iraq total no more than 5,000,
the top American general in the region said Thursday. Gen. John Abizaid said that despite
the relatively small numbers, the insurgent forces have considerable training, funding and supplies.
"The goal of the enemy is to break the will of the United States of America, to make us leave."
Well, 5,000 suicide bombers (How did you
get that figure, anyway?) with an average of
say, 20 dead per suicide bombing means we're only going to lose 100,000 more soldiers?
"Bring 'em on! War is good.
I'm a hero and the media loves me!"
Troops More Hostile With Reporters
Covering victory is OK, covering losses is strictly verboten
In October, the Belgium-based International Federation of Journalists, which includes
unions representing 500,000 journalists in more than 100 countries, complained of increased
harassment of reporters, including beatings of some, since the fall of Saddam's regime.
"Mr. Rove's truth is the only truth you need..."
In the late '90s, Ahmad Chalabi, the leader of one of the resistance groups, the Iraqi National Congress, began cultivating
and lobbying intellectuals, journalists and political leaders in Washington. Chalabi - had a shadowy past; his family, exiled from
Iraq in the late '50s, had set up a banking empire through the Middle East that collapsed in charges of fraud in 1989. (Chalabi,
who has always denied wrongdoing, has been convicted and sentenced, in absentia, by a Jordanian military court to 22 years.)
But operating out of London, the smoothly persuasive Chalabi presented himself as a democratic answer to Saddam Hussein.
With a little American backing, he promised, he could rally the Iraqi people to overthrow the Butcher of Baghdad.
Chalabi was hailed in some circles, especially
among the neocons at AEI, as the "George Washington of Iraq." But the
professionals at the State Department and at the CIA took a more skeptical view. In 1999, after Congress had passed and
President Bill Clinton had signed the Iraqi Liberation Act, providing funds to support Iraqi exile groups, the U.S. government
convened a conference with the INC and other opposition groups in London to discuss "regime change." The American officials
proposed bringing INC activists to America for training. Chalabi's aides objected. Most of the likely candidates were Iraqi refugees
living in various European countries. By coming to the United States, they could lose their refugee status. Some Pentagon officials
shook their heads in disbelief. "You had to wonder," said one who attended the conference, "how serious were these people.
They kept telling us they wanted to risk their lives for their country. But they were afraid to risk their refugee status in Sweden?"
judge removed from bench
Ten Commandments judge to run for office in Massabama
Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore was removed from office Thursday for refusing to obey
a federal court order to move his personal Ten Commandments monument from the rotunda
of the state courthouse. The court unanimously imposed the harshest penalty possible after a
one-day trial in which Moore said his refusal was a moral and lawful acknowledgment of God.
Prosecutors said Moore's defiance, left unchecked, would harm the judicial system.
Sanity wins one.
Maybe there is a God, after all.
"This is totally wrong.
Obeying the law is an option..."
Rush Limbaugh will return to his radio hate show Monday after completing a
five-week treatment program for his addiction to painkillers, his brother said Wednesday.
David Limbaugh (R-Nazi) made the announcement to Matt Drudge, who else?
"He's obviously chomping at the bit to get back
to doing what he does best," David Limbaugh said,
"which is mocking the poor, slurring black and playing lollipop jingles for gay Americans."
from Bob & Jennifer
I wonder, if enough people told Howard Dean, "Bart
maybe he'd let me be Secretary of Indignant Outrage.
'The Hollywood Hustle' by The Artful Dodger
Bill Clinton in Beijing
American Music Awards 'gift baskets' worth $31,000
George Takei in Arkansas
Micky Dolenz joining the Broadway cast of 'Aida'
What 100 carats looks like
Phil Collins' hearing loss
Justin Timberlake's new LA restaurant
Courtney Love pled innocent
And, Ahnold's been hard at work, setting new standards, in Hawaii
Subject: Jessica Lynch and *those* photos
Did any one stop to think that there are
no photos of Lynch naked
and that this is a giant US government snow job?
Even Larry Flynt can be bought... :-D
Jenni, I say no for several reasons.
Jessica had a chance to deny she posed topless with soldiers and didn't take it.
Flynt is very wealthy. In Vegas, he plays two hands of blackjack at a time for $25K each.
Sure, anyone can be bought, but I doubt Flynt could be bought by this gang of thugs.
"Bush certainly has an odd way of thanking
veterans. His administration is considering closing
58 military schools and 19 commissaries, a move that the garrison commander at Fort Stewart
calls -- quote -- "a betrayal" -- unquote. The Bush administration also opposes extending health
benefits for National Guardsmen, supports a $1.4 billion cut in military housing, and left a military
-- one million military children out of the child tax credit. Surprised? Well, you shouldn't be.
Bush apparently likes playing dress-up fighter pilot, but now, just as during Vietnam, when
our military really needs him, George W. Bush is AWOL."
--Paul Begala, Attribution
AM Radio Nazi a pervert
Jon Matthews indicted for indecency with a child
A teenager who lives in Matthews' Sugar Land neighborhood went to police Oct. 9
and made accusations against Matthews.
"Under the occasion contained in the indictment
in early October, Mr. Matthews exposed
his genitals to a child," said John Healy, the Fort Bend DA. "We have not alleged any contact."
Dean, Rebel Rouser
by Gene Lyons
Howard Dean made his point a lot more effectively when I heard him at a Little Rock appearance
earlier this year. What he planned to ask Southern white men, the former Vermont governor said,
was "You've been voting Republican for thirty years, ever since Nixon. What have you got to
show for it? Better schools? Better jobs? Reliable health insurance?"
Bringing a potentially
divisive symbol like the rebel flag into it wasn't the smartest thing Dean's
done in an otherwise cleverly innovative campaign. But his rivals' make-believe outrage made them
look ridiculous. Does anybody really think that Al Sharpton and Sen. John Kerry were personally offended?
Subject: Moore's commandments
You put it so succinctly yesterday.
Moore does not own the property he wants to put his 2.5 ton sculpture on.
So since God is so important in his life, I presume he has put this sculpture on his own front lawn?
Dan, it's not about praising God.
Moore could do that alone, inside his home.
This is about forcing his religion on others, and the Constitution says he can't.
Government Outgrows Cap Set by Pinhead
Proving Bush to be a liar about his pledge to rein in government growth,
federal discretionary spending has made the government grow by 27 percent.
The sudden rise in spending subject to Congress's
annual discretion contrasts
with the 1990s, when such discretionary spending rose an average of 2.4 percent a year.
Under Clinton, we had peace, prosperity and 2 percent government
Under the Moron, we have war, recession and runaway government spending
that had seen a budget balloon over one fourth bigger than it was two years ago.
"On this Veterans Day, with our nation at war,
Americans are deeply aware of the current
military struggle and of recent sacrifice. Young Americans have died in liberating Iraq and
Afghanistan. (He means they died to make his rich crime family richer.) They did not live to be
called veterans, but this nation will never forget their lives of service and all they did for us."
--Dubya, who spent the rest of the day looking for ways to cut veteran's benefits Attribution
The Last Samurai
Tom Cruise is such an incredibly bad actor,
even his still publicity pictures prove he can't act.
...not even a little bit, and he's been in the business for 40
That little Dakota Fanning girl?
She's only 7 or 8 and can out-act Cruise fifty ways till Sunday.
This Samurai film looks like the biggest stinker Can't-Acthas
Who buys this loser as a Samurai warrior?
Of course, it'll make a trillion dollars - because there
is no God, but we all know Uma
could kick his phoney Samurai-wannabe ass without even breaking a sweat.
Tom - if you were ready to donate a half million to bartcop.com, I kid.
Missing Cher audio file
Somebody sent me Cher's call to C-Span or NPR - whatever,
but apparently "Cher" is not part of the file's name. (I searched - no luck)
Could whoever sent that please re-send OR tell me the name of the file?
Subject: Bush Co fuzzy logic
Today, the CIA says the Iraqi resistance is 50,000 strong, while this General Abizaid also said today that it is only about 5,000 in force.
Which is it?
I'm confused, because this is some of the same fuzzy logic that we pay for and which has been utilized in producing the latest numbers on:
Leave No Child Behind,
body count in Iraq,
wounded in Iraq,
actions of Jessica Lynch,
votes counted in Florida,
Right-to-Kill but opposing Right-to-Die,
Ahnuld's groping allegations,
where the $87.5 large went?
how you pronounce "nuclear"
cutting troop pay & bennies,
$8 a meal for injured troops,
John W in H-Town
Click here for great Christmas gift ideas!
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"Members of the 160th are deployed constantly at numerous locations around the world and as
a matter of course we do not normally discuss those deployments for security reasons,'' he said.
"However, I can say that since Spc. Lynch just
recently joined the unit he is still undergoing some
of the military training crucial to fulfilling the duties of his new assignment.''
Lynch acted as a family spokesman to the
national media after his sister was rescued April 1
by U.S. forces from an Iraqi hospital in the city of Nasiriyah.
He also introduced her before the national
media at her return to Wirt County in July and rode
with her, in uniform, in a parade through Elizabeth during the homecoming celebration.
"This is nothing more than a random coincidence.
The B.F.E.E. doesn't play hardball, not with people's lives."
Subject: Two things
Your site could really benefit from adding
The first amendment and whatever it is that liberals beleive.
I think youve made it clear what your against!
As usual, I really really dont think youll have the nads to post my letter.
Not quite a stalker,
Carson, two things I believe in are spelling and punctuation.
Their Master's Voice
"It must be the voice.
It is the basso pretendo profundo voice
of the dean of boys in a strict private school. At the tables of power,
he speaks so sparsely and softly in that low hypnotic monotone, with that lower jaw tilting to the side in a
self-assured "I only talk out of one side of my mouth" kind of way, that others at the table have no choice
but to listen up. He is the one who must be obeyed.
Dick Cheney's dry Wyoming voice has the
same effect on some male Republicans, starting at the very top,
and even some journalists, that a high-pitched whistle has on a dog. How else to explain the vice president's
success in creating a parallel universe inside the White House that is shaping the real universe?...
Mr. Cheney's parallel universe is a Bizarro
world where no doubts exist. He indulges in extremes of judgment,
overpessimistic about our ability to contain Saddam and overoptimistic about the gratitude we would encounter as "liberators" in Iraq.
In Cheneyworld, the invasion of Iraq has
made the world a safer place (tell it to the Italians), W.M.D. are still
concealed in all those Iraqi basements, every Iraqi insurgent is a card-carrying member of Al Qaeda, and the
increase in attacks on Americans reflects the guerrillas' desperation, not their strengths. Guerrilla attacks on
American soldiers are labeled acts of terrorism rather than acts of war, even though the official U.S. definition
describes terrorism as attacks on civilians."
Subject: Al Franken
Bart, will Al Franken run against Tom Delay?
Subject: The picture says it all
Did you see this picture in Salon.com about
how George Bush will ban abortion?
The caption says "Members of Congress look on as President Bush signs legislation
banning a certain type of late-term abortion"
Notice (it's hard not to) that It's a group
of all white men.
Lisa, it appears American women don't mind
the B.F.E.E. making their reproductive decisions.
Besides a few mumbles from NOW, did anybody object?
The Democrats sure as hell don't mind if women lose their rights.
Hell, some Democrats actively voted to take rights away from women and their doctors.
Tens of millions of women voted for the illegal thug and his reduced-rights
If the women of American don't want abortion rights - should we men fight for them?
I'm the only pro-choicer I know of who admits abortion is the
taking of a life.
I don't like it, but it's the lesser of two evils.
Don't women care?
"If I become president of the United States,
I will pick up the phone and ask the person
who has been the most successful in trying to bring peace between the Israelis and the
Palestinians the last 25 years--I will call Bill Clinton and ask him to be my envoy."
--Howard Dean, Attribution
But Dr. Dean, why not just make Clinton Secretary of State?
You couldn't do any better than that.
Democracy Is Fit for Kings
by Joe Conason
The most quoted line of his address departed from decades of American policy toward the oil-rich
oligarchs and military rulers of the world's most strategic region. "Sixty years of Western nations
excusing and accommodating the lack of freedom in the Middle East did nothing to make us safe,"
he said, "because in the long run, stability cannot be purchased at the expense of liberty."
From now on, the United States will seek
to encourage freedom everywhere, according to the President
- perhaps even among the petroleum states where the Bush family and its cronies have so long enjoyed
the patronage of oppressive regimes. At least that is what everyone who read the speech assumed, even
though the President never mentioned Saudi Arabia by name (and reserved his scourging for Syria and Iran).
Of course Bush would never mention his father's employers.
As long as Poppy Bush is an agent for the Saudis, they are "held harmless."
Bush's American soldier body count in Iraq
Last issue it was
....this issue it's
Please vote for me. I'm a military jenius.
We're almost at 400.
How long before we hit 600?
...and then 1000?
Total deaths since President Giggle and Kill said, "Bring
Plus, at least
2298 wounded for Bush's oil grab.
Many of them are missing arms, legs and eyes.
How much more are we willing to tolerate?
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How to win:
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Get yours, then send in a digital photo of where you put it.
Click Here for the best October stickers
Winner gets Joe Conason's book, Al Franken's book or your
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Spice things up and send Bart a sticker pic
Send pics to email@example.com
Also, if you sent a sticker pic that I didn't print, please re-send.
"The trouble with our Texas Baptists is that
we do not hold them under water long enough."
--William Brann of Waco who was shot to death by an irate Baptist,Attribution
proves he a Democrat
I didn't even know dogs could vote...
Tuesday night, Leno needed a big guest to counter Madonna on Dave.
He got more than he bargained for with Triumph the Insult Comic Dog.
This is not a preview of BartCop Radio Show # 19, which
is almost ready.
This is from BartCop Radio Show # 20.
It's very short - only 30 seconds - and
you'll love it.
He gave Leno (R-Whore) a really bad time about Arnold.
I wonder if Jay will let him back on the show?
If you have something important send it to Sam at firstname.lastname@example.org
Can't get in the members section? Sam can help.
Bush! Subscribe to Salon.com
by David Talbot
We can't rely on Big Media to do the job. The vigilant Washington Post of Watergate legend
has now turned into a rubber stamp for Bush's catastrophic Iraq policy. The CBS of Edward R. Murrow,
Walter Cronkite and Norman Lear has become the "craven broadcasting system," caving to right-wing
pressure groups that demanded a politically correct version of Ronald Reagan's presidency. And just when
you thought that cable television couldn't stuff another angry white guy into prime time, CNBC just
announced it's giving Dennis Miller his own slot.
David Talbot, the guy who hired David Horowitz (R-Whore) is also
the guy, apparently, who sent
Jennifer Liberto into the bartcop.com camp in her Coulter-length skirt to bat her eyes at me, flatter me,
and lie to me and try to screw me in an effort to bring down bartcop.com and mediawhoresonline.
Hi, I'm Jennifer Liberto.
Need a Democrat stabbed in the back?
If Linda Tripp's busy, call me - I'm cheaper.
I didn't remember this, but my good friends at APJ.US wrote a thing about it.
As we shall show, Liberto in her own disarming manner sustained through the article a level of
demagoguery that Ann Coulter is reputed to achieve only at climax. ha ha We shall further
show that Liberto apparently violated several basic journalistic and ethical precepts. Whatever
the intent of her article, the effect was to injure the speech rights of private citizens, citizens
attempting to use those speech rights to reform that very same corporate media.
When I refused to play ball with this failed assassin She-Thing,
made it personal,
so we take a revenge shot at her whenever her ugly name pops up.
To be fair, (and what is bartcop.com if not fair?) Talbot
either fired her or she quit after
we smacked her a few times. Last I heard she was whoring for a newspaper in Florida.
Also, Talbot employs one of the best ever non-whore writers, my
friend Joe Conason,
so he can't be all bad, but can he be trusted to lead the anti-Bush "revolution?"
Something on your mind?
Then listen for your voice on...
You have two minutes to speak your piece.
Are so many American flags being incinerated in this country that
Wesley Clark believes we must tamper with the Bill of Rights?
Perhaps Wesley Clark feels he must downplay his intellectual credentials. That could explain why
the former Rhodes scholar abandoned his courageous defense of dissent yesterday to endorse the
flag-burning amendment while speaking at an American Legion post in New Hampshire. It was the
kind of incident to which voters have long since grown accustomed in presidential campaigns:
a smart man saying stupid things while pandering.
Do I see this as a big problem?
If I'd been shot in Vietnam, I'm sure I'd look at our flag differently
than I do.
But if Clark wanted to spend a lot of time and money on this - that would be a mistake.
by Molly Ivins
"If you want to understand George W. Bush you have to stretch your imagination around a weird
Texas amalgam: religion, anti-intellectualism and machismo. All big, deep strains here, but still an
odd combination. Then add that Bush is just another li'l upper-class white boy out trying to prove he's tough."
I'm a disaster!
out of town this weekend
(No, not Las Vegas, dammit.)
Meanwhile, you might consider reading some articles from my Blue
The language is a little rougher, but back then, sometimes two whole week's
worth of thought went into each issue, so you might notice the contrast.
To get started Click Here
Have a good time today.
Sometimes the peach truck has a flat and you get a second chance.
Don't waste a day - not even one.
And whatever you do, never give up because we're going to win!
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Copyright © 2003, bartcop.com
If your GOP workplace doesn't want you to
see the truth, use these mirrors.
Shirley - back with the long red/brown hair.
She downplays her beauty and sexuality, but if they put a nice picture
of her on the cover of the next CD - I'll bet it will sell extra millions.
Shrl, call The BartPhone,
just to say "Hi!"
Plus, leave an e-mail address and I'll make you a BartCop Member - for free!
You can call the Bart-Phone at 918-493-1500
That would be really cool, and we'll catch you at The Joint on your next American tour.
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