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GOP Rap Sheet


  In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Poll Shows Kerry Ahead
Cheney, Chavez and Clinton
Bush is no Salk
D-r-i-v-e   b-y   N-e-w-
F-9/11 Provokes Arabs
Bush Plans to Cut Forces
Calling Bush a Fascist
War Costs Soldiers' Jobs
Kill Bill Part II - Del Castillo


Quote of the Day

"I loved the movie because it showed
  that Bush was a partner in terrorism...
   --typical Arab reaction to F9-11  Attribution

Bart Store

Support Bartcop.com PO Box 54466 , Tulsa, OK 74155PayPal to bartcop@bartcop.com

Volume 1379 - Coward 

  Monday    August 16, 2004 


"When I hear this coming from Dick Cheney, who was a coward, who would not serve during
  the Vietnam War, it makes my blood boil. Those of us who served and those of us who went in
  the military don't like it when someone like a Dick Cheney comes out and he wants to be tough.
  Yeah, he'll be tough. He'll be tough with somebody else's blood, somebody else's kids. But not
  when it was his turn to go."
     --Sen. Tom Harkin, taking the gloves off to bitch-slap the Chicken-in Chief,     Attribution

 Tom, I love hearing the truth.
 Where have you been the last four years?

 Kerry leads Bush -- despite Nader
  Click  Here

"John Kerry has pulled ahead of Bush, even with Ralph Nader accounted for, according to a new poll.
 Kerry led Bush 47-43 percent (with distractions) in the Zogby poll. Minus those contenders, Kerry and Edwards
 were favored 50-43 percent over Smirk and Snarl in the November 2 vote."

  Dirge me


"The Americans have turned the holy city into a ghost town. They are now seen as full of hatred against
  Najaf and the Shia. Nothing I know of will change this. I do not understand why America craves crisis.
  A peaceful solution to the confrontation with Muqtada could have been reached. We were hoping that
  Prime Minister Iyad Allawi would lead the way, but he sided with oppression. There is no wisdom to
  what the Americans and Allawi are doing. The consequences are unthinkable."
      --Former US ally Muhammad Bahr al-Ulum, who has lost faith in the US, and says millions of
         moderates like him, who welcomed last year's invasion, now regard Washington as an enemy,   Attribution

 Cheney, Chavez and Bill Clinton's Band
      by Greg Palast

  Click  Here

 What the affable president sees in his reflection, beyond the ribbons of office, is a
 "negro e indio" -- a "Black and Indian" man, dark as a cola nut, same as the landless and,
 until now, the hopeless.  For the first time in Venezuela's history, the 80% Black-Indian
 population elected a man with skin darker than the man in the Jaguar.

 So why, with a huge majority of the electorate behind him, twice in elections and today with
 a nearly two-to-one landslide victory in a recall referendum, is Hugo Chavez in hot water with
 our democracy-promoting White House?



"We've still got about 80 days to go in this campaign, and Kerry has already made about
  $2.2 trillion of new promises. And so I said, 'Well, how are you going to pay for it?' And he said,
 'Oh, don't worry, we'll tax the rich.' You've heard that rhetoric before, haven't you?"
     --Dubya, reading the script he got from Condi   Attribution

 He's right - we heard that in 1992, from Bill Clinton, just before the greatest economic boom ever.

 I'm glad Salk wasn't a Bush

  Click  Here

 Laura Bush could not have expected to end the argument over stem cell research with her tepid proclamation:
"We don't even know that stem cell research will provide cures for anything -- much less that [cures] are very close."
 Do you see that next hill? We're not going to climb it because there may be nothing worthwhile on the other side.

 That's not how Americans approach life or the world, of course. We climb the hill. So what Mrs. Bush is really doing
 is making a persuasive casefor upending her husband's restrictive policies, which have severely limited research on
 therapeutic cloning in this country.

 Jonas Salk could not have known his concoction of weakened polio viruses would protect against the deadly disease.
 But he certainly believed it would. And millions of Americans dared to believe with him. Many parents were worried
 by the prospect of intentionally infecting their children with a lessened strain of a hideous virus. But faced with an
 epidemic, they made the leap. And they ended up protecting their children from the scourge.

 A shout out to JSY in PittburgH, my good friend who was the brains behind Salk's discoveries.


 A shot of Chinaco to your brains and bravery, Sir!

 Subject:  Kerry's gaffe

 You're right on with what you've said about Kerry's "sensitive" speech.
 The people reading your site might be fairly intelligent people who can see
 Cheney's remarks for the misquoted out-of-context lies they are but I'm afraid
 that most of America cannot.

 Perhaps what the Kerry campaign needs is a list of "Seven Dirty Words" to never say,
 ala what the FCC has. Sensitive would have to be one of the top words on such a list.

 Keep swingin,

 Sean, well put. You phrased that perfectly.

 I'm catching heat for "buying the GOP lie," which isn't true, but America might be buying it.
 People are scared and they know another 9-11 is coming, and they don't want these killers
 to be treated "nice." They know Bush is a blood-thirsty, giggling murderer, and that's what
 many of them want when it comes time to deal with Al Qaeda.

 ...and let's hope Kerry learns to dial back the "Bush did the right thing" gaffes, too.

Best way to measure - who killed the most innocent people in the last 2 years?


"We will all be better off as we continue to rally the armies of compassion."
    --Dubya, at a rally in Portland,    Attribution

"Thank you for your army of compassion, Meester Bush..."

 Fahrenheit 9/11 Provokes Arab Reactions
  "...attendance is at blockbuster proportions"

  Click  Here

"Fahrenheit 9/11" is provoking strong Arab reaction. Kuwait banned it, Jordan tried
 to cut it, Syria has not decided, and Saudi commentators are denouncing it.

 Many Arab moviegoers say with a twinge of envy that they wish the region, where
 free speech is for the most part restricted, had its own Moore. Some say it reinforces
 their bad image of the United States and shows Americans what their own media does not.

 I guess compared to Saudi Arabia America has free speech, but compared to ten years ago?
 This is a closed society and the media is run by the illegal, fascist government.

"I appreciate your support..."


 Subject: Thanks for making August our month

 Dear BartCop,

 This week, you proved two things. First, the right-wing attack machine cannot act without consequences.
 Your action has ensured that they are held accountable for their lies -- we will not yield an inch.

 Second, the common wisdom is wrong -- August is our month. Your support of the Democratic Party
 has made all the difference in eliminating the Bush campaign's August fundraising advantage.

 Next week, I'll send you an important campaign update that lays out our winning strategy for the next
 two months -- and how you will play a vital role in that victory. Thank you again for all that you do.

 Let's get to work!

 Thank you,
 Mary Beth Cahill
 Campaign Manager
 Kerry-Edwards 2004

 I assume everybody got one of those, right?

Used with permission :)

 Drama Expected Between Michael Jackson and D.A.
  Prosecutors could lose their key evidence if they obtained it illegally

  Click  Here

 Phelps Breaks Own Record for Swimming Gold
  Dominating performance in the 400-meter individual medley

  Click  Here

 Oil and Economy Cloud Stocks' Outlook
  Record high oil prices and never-ending war - let's vote the bastard out

  Click  Here

 Bush Vows Rapid Aid to Hurricane Victims
  Hell yes - Brother Jeb and Florida have how many electoral votes?

  Click  Here

 One year later - power outage traced to Dim Bulb

  Click  Here

 Instead of fixing the system, the fix is in. We now know that goof-ups and bone-headed moves
 started the power outage rolling but it's spread, from a few tree branches out of Ohio to a third
 of the continent, occurred because power companies -- First Energy and Niagara-Mohawk to
 name two -- had slashed staffing and maintenance.

 The under-manning and the under-spending all occurred beneath the banner of "deregulation."
 In the bad old days of bureaucrats with thick rule books, the government told the power companies
 exactly how much to spend on repairs. Under "deregulation," the rules went out the windows and
 repair cash was carted off as special dividends to stockholders.

"Power is my specialty..."


 Bob's Amsterdam Report
  Liked it so much, he changed his name to Hollander

  Click  Here


This guy sold 25 t-shirts at a Kerry rally....all he had with him.

 Bush Plans to Cut Forces in Europe, Asia

  Click  Here

 As part of the largest troop realignment in years, Bush will shift about 70,000 uniformed military
 personnel, most of them currently in Europe, two senior administration officials said, speaking on
 condition of anonymity. A significant proportion will come home, though it was not clear when.

 A "significan portion" will come home?
 What's a "significan portion," forty percent?

 Sounds like 60 percent are going you-know-where.


"Bring 'em on - we're not scared!!"

 Subject: Sensitive Dick

 Cheney has used the "S" word consistently, as recently as this morning,
 This whole "sensitivity" issue is a complete load of shit cooked up by the ghost
 of Lee Atwater and paraded through the streets by a willing and slatternly rabble of press whores....

 What a bunch of crap:

  Click  Here

 I agree 100 percent - that's why I'm angry that Kerry fell into this tar pit.
 They're going to make Kerry's "sensitivity towards Osama" their campaign theme.

 Dueling Quotes

"I read Arab newspapers, and I've sensed a change, a good change, in the Arab community,
  and that's why I support Bush. I see all this, and I just wanted to say thank you for what he's done."
     --Moses Nijmeh, an Israel-born Palestinian, who says he thinks Bush has been good for the Arab world,     Attribution

  Obviously that's true.
  Bush is loved and respected by every Arab in every Arab country.

 "...another poll of Arab-American voters in four key electoral states (Florida, Michigan, Ohio
  and Pennsylvania) placed the president's approval rating at about 30 percent.."
      --David S. Broder,   Attribution

 Shirley Manson's Diary

  Click  Here

 It's been a long time since I wrote in this journal and so very much has happened and yet
 at the same time so very little has changed.   Bush is still wreaking havoc with antagonistic
 foreign policy whilst Blair continues to deny that there's even a remote possibility that he
 might have led the UK into an invasion of Iraq under false pretenses. Hundreds of thousands
 of people in Sudan are still falling victim to fully fledged genocide whilst the so-called-civilised
 world sits back on its heels doing precious little about it.  Power and money remain the corrupting
 influences and common people around the world suffer immeasurably as a consequence.


 Subject: Pull yourself together, man

 You sound like you're losing it.  First of all, Kerry is ahead of Bush in many polls.
 Kerry is ahead of Bush in Florida!  And, just to make you feel a little bit better,
 when I was on msnbc.com Tuesday, the live poll of 150,000 people showed 68%
 for Kerry, 30% for Bush, and 2% for "Nadir."

 There are many people (I'm NOT one of them) that think that going to war was
 a good idea.  There are probably a lot more people that think we should have
 gone to war and gotten rid of Saddam than think we shouldn't have gone.

 You think that Kerry is being skewered now for being a flip-flopper?
 Let him say that he was wrong in his vote!
 Thousands of votes (at least) would go up in smoke.

 He is doing what is best.
 Could you POSSIBLY help the cause by giving him your support?
 It really just sounds like you're out of your gourd, or are trying to be sensationalistic.


 Faith, if I said Kerry was doing a great job I would be lying.
 I'd like to say that, but too many people know that's not true.

 Saying Bush did the right thing by invading Iraq was a doozy.
 He just excused the 1,000 dead and the never-ending quagmire.

 Mark Spitz

 You might not know him, he's a famous swimmer from the 72 Olympics,
(where the PLO thought they'd prove their barbarism by introducing terrorism.)

 Spitz won like 22 gold medals in 1972, and the Russian coach asked, "Dude, what's your secret?"
 He said, "The secret is my thick mustache," and the Russian coach said, WTF?"

 Spitz told the Russian coach that the mustache acted as a drainage system, pushing oncoming water
 to the left and right which made breathing easier and it also improved his vision.

 He was lying.
 He told somebody this week, Playboy, TV Guide - somebody, that his coaches or trainers or the IOC,
 sombody, told him to shave the mustache becasue it wasn't appropriate, so Spitz kept it to spite them.

 Shot of Chinaco to Mark Spitz for having a little rebellion in his heart.
 Wish the senate Democrats were as balsy as Mustache Boy.

 So - is that all there is?
 On  bartcop.com  we deliver.

 Spitz said the next time he saw the Russian swim team, they all had mustaches.

 ha ha

 I told Mrs Bart that story, and while accidentally watching a few minutes of Olympics swimming
 on NBC with Mrs Bart, she said, "The Russians don't have mustaches this year."

 Maybe they read Playboy or TV Guide.

 Subject: About John Kerry's "Sensitivity" remarks

 I understand completely what your readers have been saying about Bush and his minions taking Kerry's
"sensitivity" remarks out of context, but I am also aware that you are trying to tell everyone that these dirty
 bastards will do everything in their power to twist, distort and even outright lie about anything and everything
 Kerry will or won't say in order to win the male and/or redneck vote.  Hasn't the Kerry campaign learned
 anything from his wife's speech and how the rethug reporter tried to make her comment on a negative
 statement she did not even make?  These minions will stop at nothing to make the Democrats look bad,
 so the last thing Kerry needs to do is to give them any bits that make him look weak and girlish.
 Yes, I like that Kerry is smart and intellectual and is capable of reasoned thinking, and these traits are
 quite valuable when one is acutally governing.  However, in a campaign, these do not serve us well at all,
 especially since we are in a culture that has been dumbed down to the point of being nearly brain dead.
 If Kerry is going to win this election, every statement he makes needs be factual, but simple, concise,
 and to the point, and it has to hit the voter straight in the gut and not his head.  I don't understand why
 we are arguing or being defensive about what lies Bush is saying about Kerry when we have the whole
 failed presidency of Bush to bludgeon the voters with and get them over to our side.  We have the hard
 facts here!  It's about time we used them to hammer our case home!

 Patrick H

 Bart's Law #1
 Don't EVER tell the truth in a political campaign.
 People want to be lied to.

 I read something about Bill Maher since the last issue.

 He said he's the first guy who ever said, "Sucks" on network TV.   It was around 1988-90.
 He said something like, "Waiting in line at the DMV sucks," ...something harmless like that.

 When he left and went backstage, he said everyone was ashen-faced and somber.
 "You can't say 'sucks' on network TV," they told him, and Bill's like ...WTF?
 Bill Maher, always being a little too frank for the uptight, religio-lie-to-ourselvers.

 Three days later, Johnny said, "...and that sucks" and the NBC censors let it go,
 thus "sucks" became part of the accepted vernacular amongst the church going public.

 Funny how the Republican right is sooo terribly offended if someone uses the language that most
 Americans use each and every day, and if you think I'm lying, ask Dick go-fuck-yourself Cheney.

 That entire Janet Jackson handjob was the best example ever.
 A thousand dead soldiers in Iraq is just fine, but a titty on TV for a full second?
 Why, it's time to get involved and change the direction his nation is heading.

 It's fine and dandy if Bush's lies kill a thousand brave patriots, but a flash of titty
 gets the Christians demanding change because, ...after all, ...which is more awful?

 Subject: Update on Diian Haridision

  Click  Here

 Why I won't Apologize for Calling Bush a Fascist
   not that anyone has asked me to...

  Click  Here

 1. Powerful and continuing expressions of nationalism.
 2. Disdain for the importance of human rights.
 3. Identification of enemies/scapegoats as a unifying cause.
 4. The supremacy of the military/avid militarism.
 5. Rampant sexism.
 6. A controlled mass media.
 7. Obsession with national security.
 8. Religion and ruling elite tied together.
 9. Power of corporations protected.
10. Power of labor suppressed or eliminated.

Fahrenheit 9-11,
Hunting of the President
Order your copies from the BartCop Bookstone

 Reservists Say War Makes Them Lose Jobs
  I have an idea how to get even - vote the bastard out

  Click  Here

 National Guard and Reserve troops who have returned from Iraq and Afghanistan find new battles
 with their civilian employers at home. Jobs were eliminated, benefits reduced and promotions forgotten.

 Larry Gill couldn't return as a police officer in Thomasville, Ala., because a grenade injured a foot,
 making it impossible for him to chase criminals or duck bullets.

 Jerry Chambers says budget cuts eliminated his job as a substance abuse prevention consultant.

 Ron VanderWal was told his job as a CSR was eliminated. He was hired after filing a lawsuit.

 Getting your old job back is nothing compared to putting your marriage back together. Many of those
 returning aren't the same people they were when they left. Plus children have been born, loved ones have
 been buried while they were gone, their spouses have new lives, making decisions alone instead of as a team.

 ...all because the spoiled little boy saw something he wanted to steal.


 Subject: Democrats attacking Bart

 yeah bartcop, one of the more depressing things i have seen the past year is those
 democrats who say you back bush because you criticized kerry's mistakes.
 when it comes to american elections, the only thing that counts is image and spin.
 kerry needs to be careful not to say things (words such as "sensitive" in relation to terrorism)
 that can be picked up and used by the bushmen to score points. and dressing up in funny costumes!
 jeez man, didn't these guys learn anything from the dukakis fiasco.
 when you try to set them straight, they just turn on you!  
 where are the street-smart democrats who know how to run an election campaign?
 Rove & Co. know how to play that dirty game, Kerry had better learn it or it's 4 more yrs of Bush.
 and you are right about the debates. they are set up now so kerry will lose.  brit hume will roast kerry
 with Qs like-  "will you continue to flip-flop for the rest of the campaign, Sen. kerry?" while handing
 bush easy ones such as , "Mr Prezident, Sir, what is your plan to continue success in iraq,
 getting revenge on saddam hussein for his 9-11 attack on the usa?"  that's about it.

 I wish I knew what Kerry's people were thinking when they signed up for the "Gored-style" debates.
 Why can't they argue like two men, without the clock, the cutesy whore-press questions and the circus?
 The silly-ass clock prevents either man from actually speaking. They'll time it so each guy can repeat
 his standard 30-second sound bite and they might as well do this debate via e-mail.

 Why have an audience there, besides to challengeg both sides to interrupt the loudest?
 The Democrats will politely clap, while the Republicans will stomp, scream and shout,
 making America think "Bush has grabbed the hearts of the undecided voters."

 In gambling, there an old saying, "We'll play by your rules if I get to keep score."
 Kerry agreed to their rules AND they get to keep score.


 Low on tequila

 In our last Cinco de Mayo Show, I was sipping on nine kinds of tequila.
 Those nine have been here since around Tommy Mack's visit in March 03.
 I have these nine bottles of luxury tequila that have about a quarter inch each in them.

 People ask, "Bart, why aren't the radio shows funnier?"
 All radio shows (besides the Vegas Pokerfest) are done straight and sober.
 One school of thought is that good comedy can come from the uninhibited mind.

 Bottom line, I'm itching to do a "funny" show so I guess I need to mow some more
 lawns for the neighbors to come up with enough money to buy some more tequila.

 Glass sliver removed

 About two weeks ago, I was barefoot and stepped on the tiniest sliver of glass you never saw.
 For two weeks, I walked around with the chunk (now it's a chunk) of glass in my foot, which is
 the same bad leg that had the bungled statute-of-limitations-has-run-out butchery on my knee last time,
 magnified by the still-smarting sensation of having Sir Lance-a-Knee having fun with his Turkey Wattle.

 ...but the good news is, after the stabbing of Sir Lance-a-Knee wears off, my knee feels a lot better.

 So I'm lying on the living room floor face down with my foot palms-up in Mrs Bart's surgical lap.
 She got a needle and starting rootin' around for that that sliver of glass, and each time she jabbed
 the glass further into my foot, I'd scream like a senate democrat dreaming he angered Karl Rove.

 She dug, I screamed.
 She dug a hole you could fit a bb in.

 Thunderbolt hits me in the head!

 Soak the foot in warm water for an hour and try again.
 She dug, I screamed.

 I told her, "If you can't get it, our next stop is the local Minor Emergency Center," so she dug real deep
 one last time ( I bit a chunk out of the carpet, but we think we can glue it back in ) and she was able to
 pop that sliver of glass out of my foot on the next try.   That alone was worth getting married.

 After that bb hole closes and heals, my foot's going to feel a lot better.
 And after my last double lance Thursday, I'll be walking "normal" until something else breaks.

 So it's Springtime in K-Drag!

Louisiana Governor Kathleen Babineaux Blanco with Blake

Brad and Bill Press

Bartcop at Cheers

Marty's Entertainment Page


"Honestly, I don't know what to do. Now, when I look at it, I think Bush misled the people about Iraq,
  and I feel sad for all the families, for all these soldiers that had to die. But then I don't really know what
  Kerry would do about it either. I guess I can only wait and see what happens."
      --Mirna Zavala, wishing Kerry would give her a reason to vote for him   Attribution

 Subject: Will someone please step forward?

 Geez, will someone of stature in the Democratic Party please step forward and start defending John Kerry?

 When I say "defend", I mean to go on the attack against Bush and Cheney. This is getting ridiculous.
 There is an endless litany of good material to use against Bush.
 As but one example, the economic news is just horrific right now. Where are the Democratic charges that
 Bush is destroying our economy? The Congressional Budget Office confirms that the Bush tax cuts strongly
 favor the very wealthy. This point should be driven home by Democrats, over and over and over again.
 We will not win this election by taking a defensive stance on all issues. Let's go on the attack.
 I've donated my money to the Kerry campaign -- where is it being used?
 Donald P. R

 Don, for reasons I can't explain, the Democrats are too scared to fight.
 The only figiting back you can expect is from the comedy shows and anti-Bush websites.

 ...but I must say it was refreshing to hear Tom Harkin call Cheney a coward.
 I guess his four-year sore throat is felling better?

  is different.

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"The best hope for stopping Iran and North Korea (and it's a bleak one) is to negotiate
  a grand bargain in which they give up nuclear aspirations for trade benefits. Bush's
  current policy - fist-shaking - feels good but accomplishes nothing...  Bush is pursuing
  a new generation of nuclear bunker-buster bombs. That approach helps make nukes
  thinkable, and even a coveted status symbol, and makes us more vulnerable"
      --Nicholas D. Kristof, "The Nuclear Shadow",  Attribution

Bush's American soldier body count in Iraq

 920, 925, 932, 934, 943  dead American soldiers.

...and Kerry can't take a clear lead in this race?

"I know what I'm doing when it comes to winning this war."
 --The Butcher of Baghdad,      Attribution


 Shame on the Swift Boat Veterans for Bush
   by Jim Rassmann, the guy Kerry saved to get the medal

  Click  Here

 When I surfaced, all the swift boats had left, and I was alone taking fire from both banks. To avoid the incoming fire,
 I repeatedly swam under water as long as I could hold my breath, attempting to make it to the north bank of the river.
 I thought I would die right there. The odds were against me avoiding the incoming fire and, even if I made it out of the river,
 I thought I'd be captured and executed. Kerry must have seen me in the water and directed his driver, Del Sandusky,
 to turn the boat around. Kerry's boat ran up to me in the water, bow on, and I was able to climb up a cargo net to the
 lip of the deck. But, because I was nearly upside down, I couldn't make it over the edge of the deck. This left me hanging
 out in the open, a perfect target. John, already wounded by the explosion that threw me off his boat, came out onto the bow,
 exposing himself to the fire directed at us from the jungle, and pulled me aboard.

 For his actions that day, I recommended John for the Silver Star, our country's third highest award for bravery under fire.

 Subject: Source help

 Hi, Bartcop,

 Love your site -- I rely on it for my daily dose of infuriation.

 I have a question that I hope you could answer for me.  I have no doubt the Iraq invasion
 was solely for the purpose of pumping the country's oil into ChimpBoy and Pals pockets.

 You frequently cite the 90 million a day figure - a fact I bring up whenever I'm discussing
 the issue with the idiot warmongers in my family.  What I could really use is a source -- not
 so much one that backs up the 2 million barrels a day figure, but rather one that will provide
 proof that this oil is being pumped by Chimp's buddies and that they are reaping the financial
 benefits of it.  I have a few uncles I need to shut up.

 So much appreciated and please keep up the excellent work!

 Brian, I can't prove they're stealing the $90M a day, but since it's (apparently) a secret, what else can we
 assume but that it's none of our business, and knowing where that $90M a day goes only helps bin Laden.
 $90M a day is a lot of money for a starving, bombed and broken country.

 That's roughly $3 billion dollars a month, but nobody knows where it went because there's a war on
 and we all know how tough bookkeeping is during a war. With each beheading, the BFEE can argue
 bookkeeping in these horrific times is simply impossible, kind like justifying Halliburton's expense report.

 Bottom line:
 It's not up to Tequilaboy in Oklahoma to explain how that $3 billion a month disappeared.
 That's Bush's job and the Democrats are supposed to hold his feet to the fire.


 Eldrick Woods Has More Major Frustration

  Click  Here

 Standing over his tee shot on the par-3 seventh, he settled in over his ball
 when he heard the click from a news photographer behind the tee box.

 Woods turned and glared at him, then dropped the club as soon as he made contact.
"Good (expletive) swing," he growled. "Great focus."

 Poor Eldrick.

 Subject: Bart, Jon Stewart agrees, and screamed, "Kerry's TRYING to lose!"

 After he played the clip of Bush challenging Kerry to say "yes" or "no" to invading Iraq if he knew what
 is now known, and then Stewart says "Kerry should hit this one out of the park!" and cuts to Kerry saying
 "yes" he would have still voted to let Bush invade Iraq....Stewart just lost it.
 He was incredulous and cried out "He's TRYING to LOSE!"
 Is there no one in the Kerry camp who watches Jon?

 This is why I was completely depressed when Clark did not get the VP pick...
 Clark woulda kicked Kerry's ass into fighting shape.  I'm afraid of what Kerry will say or do in the debates...
 I thought it would be REAL bad for Bush, but Kerry ENJOYS capitulating to the enemy framing the questions,
 and then giving the WRONG answer!!   I don't feel good about any of this.

 Was the last time Kerry has been in a fight was over 30 years ago???
 That is why Clark was needed....fighting was fresh to him.
 Hell, even Kerry's wife seems like more of a fighter than HIM.
 Mark G
 St Charles

 Mark, it's always possible that Kerry's string of gaffes could end,
 but he seems determined to screw up at every opportunity.

 Does anyone know why Kerry said murdering Baghdad was a great idea?


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 Today in History

 • In 1777, American forces kicked Brit ass in the Battle of Bennington, Vt.

 • In 1812, Detroit fell to British and Indian forces in the War of 1812.

 • In 1829, Siamese twins Chang and Eng Bunker, arrived in Boston to be ridiculed.

 • In 1858, a telegraph from Queen Victoria to President Buchanan was sent over the new trans-Atlantic cable.

 • In 1861, President Lincoln prohibited the states of the Union from trading with the seceding states of the Confederacy.
   (But that ban was broken when Willard P. Bush, founder of the BFEE, was caught selling weapons to Robert E. Lee)
 • In 1948, Babe Ruth died in New York at age 53 after eating 16 hot dogs and failing to burp.

 • In 1954, Sports Illustrated was born.

 • In 1956, Adlai E. Stevenson was selected to re-lose to Ike.

 • In 1977, Elvis died at Graceland at age 42.
   (The drugs made by Poppy Bush can kill you)

 • In 2003, U.S. Rep Bill Janklow ran over motorcyclist Randy Scott, who died in the accident.
    Since he's a Republican, he got a slap on the wrist.
    Randy Scott's mother says the family is getting along the best they can.



 Subject: the toilets make me sick. Your slander

 Dude, you're not supposed to drink out of them. Try bottled water.

 I have a friend in Waco, TX who drives down to Austin by the state capital and begs for money.

 Yip, yip, yip, yip, yahoo.

 Lots of well-to-do people in Austin you know.  He tells me he makes over $400 a day.
 Man, that's over $100,000 a year!  He works 6 hours a day, works 4 days a week and sometimes
 he plays golf at Balcones Country Club.  He often lunches at County Line on the Hill and Threadgill's.

 You can afford to be mighty proud of your friend.

 He drives a 2004 Lexus, but makes sure nobody sees him get in it.  He has a poli-sci from Baylor
 and a masters from UT, Austin.  He saves $40,000 a year from his tax-free annual income.
 They let him go inside when it rains and he has a big umbrella he can sit under and not get wet.



 What does your friend's income have to do with you drinking out of toilets and slander?

 This is the best I can do for Monkey Mail.
 Apparently, I've inserted my boot in every swollen red-ass Republican in North America,
 because THIS is the best I can do with "brave" Republicans who can back up their opinions.

 Kill Bill Part II

 Friday night, me & Mrs. Bart saw Kill Bill Part II for the first time on DVD.
 Good movie, but that's not what I'm writing about.

 The surprise Uma pulled on Daryl Hannah in the trailer fight - wasn't that the most unexpected thing ever?
 Mrs Bart is still laughing - she loves both Kill Bills and is now a big Tarantino fan.

 Sidebar in a sidebar:
 I knew that was Sam Jackson sitting at the wedding chapel piano player.
 You'll think I'm lying, but I could tell by the way he held his cigarette that it was him..

 Towards the end. Uma has killed everyone who needed dying - except Bill.
 Not sure why, but she was looking for him in Mexico or Central America - somewhere.
 The soundtrack suddenly started sounding familiar. I turned to Mrs Bart and said,
"Mrs Bart, that sounds like our good friend Rick del Castillo playing."

 We decided I didn't know enough about Latino/Salsa/Flaminco/Ethinic/Passion music to judge.
 As the movie ended, we watched the credits for a clue to what band played the del Castillo-sounding music.

 The credits said, "Music by Robert Rodriquez," the famous director and "The RZA."
 I said to Mrs Bart, "Mrs Bart, Robert Rodriquez directed 'Once Upon a Time in Mexico,'"
 which featured our good friend Rick's band, but maybe he knows more than one excellent
 Latino/Salsa/Flaminco/Ethinic/Passion band, but those RZA dudes sure sound like Rick's band."

 Saturday night, we still had the DVD in the player, so I clicked on the Kill Bill II "Special Featrures."
 Among the listings was "Chinga playing live at the Kill Bill II Premier."  In the director's comments,
 Tarantino was going on about the 3-piece Mariachi bands that play at Mexican Restaurants, so I
 suspected "Chinga" might be one of them. So I clicked on that and began to prepare supper..

 I was partly paying attention to the TV as I whipped up some Train Station Fried Chicken,
 and I heard a voice I've become familiar with - and I blurted out, "That's Alex from Rick's band."
 Sure enough, there was Robert Rodriguez on stage playing guitar with Del Castillo.
"Chinga" is apparently Del Castillo with Rodriquez on third guitar.

 On the Del Castillo website, they mention that they've been on two sountracks, Mexico and Mariachis
 and Rodriquez's Once Upon a Time in Mexico, but there's no mention of their Kill Bill Part II soundtrack

 That's confusing to a low IQ guy like myself, because at least financially, Kill Bill II is the biggest movie
 of the three, but, ...since "The RZA" and Chingons" appeared in Kill Bill II and not "Del Castillo," per se,
 I'll bet some lawyers got involved just to deny the Del Castillo band from being able to say, "That's us!"
 So I'll say it for them.

 But why the discrepancy?

 ...why am I asking you?

 I should call my good friend Rick and ask him. (That was him in BCR #50, part 4)
 One thing - I'll be sure to call late in the day.
 Rick doesn't like being unexpectedly jarred out of bed too early, even if it's Julie McCullough.

 Tuesday, the 17th, Del Castillo at Orlando's Hard Rock, the place that gives Rude Rich serious wood.
 If you're in Orlando, drop by and see Del Castillo, and tell Rick that Bart says, "Hey!"

 New York to unleash reighteous fury on GOP

  Click  Here

"John Flanigan and Tim Doody are two other protest co-ordinators aiming to make 31 August
 a day of direct action. They said they would shun the idea of applying for any form of permit.
'We already have a permit. It is called the American constitution. The idea that I have to ask
 for permission to protest my own government is ridiculous,' Flanigan said. Sitting on the steps
 of St Mark's church in the East Village, the pair typified the anger felt by protesters that the
 Republicans are holding their convention in a city that prides itself on its liberalism. 'This has
 really shaken everyone out of their complacency. People are outraged,' said Doody.

 Polls support that reaction. A recent survey showed that 83 per cent of New Yorkers did not
 want the convention in their city. 'We all live here,' said Angela Coppola, an office worker who
 has joined the protest groups. 'We were the victims of 11 September and now they are coming
 to terrorise us with their asinine convention.'"

 Maybe someone will remind America that
 Bush stood on the rubble that still contained
 bodies and swore to get bin Laden, then
 abandon that vow to steal Saddam's oil.

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BCR Show 50 - The Golden Anniversary Show   is here
Oh yeah, ...there's some language in this show.

Click  Here  to listen to Part 1 of  Show 50
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28 minutes of slapdown, Capital Gang, DemoCon speeches
and Ben Affleck, rising Democratic star ...and one day senator?

Click  Here  to listen to Part 2 of  Show 50
Click  Here  to download Part 2 of  Show 50
25 minutes of mostly the Big Dog's speech

Click  Here  to listen to Part 3 of  Show 50
Click  Here  to download Part 3 of  Show 50
24 minutes of your phone calls with rebuttals

Click  Here  to listen to Part 4 of  Show 50
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25 minutes of Leno, Dave, Jon, Bart, etc

Click  Here  for the radio archives

  A barely-recognizable Gwen Stefani and Shirley

 Shrl, call  The BartPhone, just to say "Hi!"
 Plus, leave an e-mail address and I'll make you a BartCop Member - for free!

 You can call the Bart-Phone at 918-748-1714
 That would be really cool, and we'll catch you in Vegas at The Joint on your next American tour.

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