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Weekend-Monday   Jan 28-30, 2006  Volume 1698 - Cock & Bull

Quote of the Day

"A CBS poll shows Bush's approval at 42%. 
  Congressional approval is at 29%." 
     -- Wake-Up Call,   Link

In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
GOP Loved Filibuster 
Abramoff Pros. Gone 
Swiftboating Our Own 
Harry Reid's Excuse
Top 50 Loathsome 
Sheehan vs Feinstein?
Wife Snatchings 
The Jellyfish Party
Kristen Kreuk's Smallville 



Bush will break laws until 
the Democrats tell him to stop.
Will they ever do that?
Support Bartcop.com PO Box 54466 , Tulsa, OK 74155PayPal to https://www.paypal.com/affil/pal=bartcop@bartcop.com



"He's a coward. He's supposed to be this macho guy. 
  He'll take on Osama bin Laden, but he won't take me on." 
    -- Helen Thomas, on Dubya avoiding her  Link


When Republicans Loved a Filibuster
  by Robert Parry  as seen on consortiumnews.com


In 1991, Republicans were worried that a full-scale October Surprise investigation might implicate
Bush in near-treasonous talks with an enemy state and devastate his 1992 reelection campaign.
Confirmation of the allegations also would have eviscerated the legitimacy of the Reagan-Bush era.

So, in November 1991, Republican leaders used the filibuster to block funding for the investigation.
The Democrats mustered 51 votes - a majority - but fell short of the 60 votes needed for cloture.
A fully funded investigation was prevented.

Notice we didn't get that fact from the Democrats.
They are too afraid to mention the facts that would help them and remind voters
of the crimes the BFEE was caught committing red-handed at the same time.

Notice we didn't get that fact from the, "We love Bush" American whore media, either.

Thank you, Robert Parry.

Note: consortiumnews.com  is the most important site on the Internet.


Abramoff Prosecutor Resigns


The investigation of Jack Abramoff took a surprising new turn on Thursday when the
Justice Department said the chief prosecutor in the inquiry would step down next week
because he had been nominated to a federal judgeship by President Bush.

This is obstruction of justice.
Bush is delaying/killing this prosecution because he's involved in the crimes.


Swiftboating Our Own


There are still three years to go but already some Democrats are forming a circular firing squad.
Karl Rove must be laughing so hard his pants will never dry. Can Democrats ever learn to allow
candidates the dignity of running for an office before trashing them?

Hillary has a huge popular majority over any other potential candidate and their agenda is to bring her down
any way they can. And, it is also the agenda of the Republicans who fear that she can beat any candidate they offer.



Subject: Hillary by the numbers

Short answer -- backing the front-runner brings Democrats nothing but trouble. 
Don't do it. 
Joe H

My "Hillary by the Numbers" thing didn't work, not even a little.
Nobody, not a single reply I read, would say that Hillary "wasn't like" the others.

This is great news.
It means that Bill Clinton wasn't impeached.
It means those hundreds of attack books on Hillary never existed.
It means Falwell never sold videotapes listing "Hillary's murders" in Little Rock.
It means nobody ever heard of that rat-bastard, Kenneth Starr.
It means Hillary is not the most investigated woman in Earth's history.
It means the Republicans didn't spend $100M trying to take down our last elected president.
It means that Paulie Walnuts-scumbag did not rifle thru Hillary's underwear drawer to humiliate her.
It means FOX News and MSGOP weren't created to cover every nasty detail of the Great Cock Hunt.

Since none of that happened, Hillary is, indeed, just another senate Democrat.

Tell me - what color is the grass on the planet where you guys live?


Subject: military budget

Clinton cut US military budget 40%, to balance the US budget, and NOT nay penny pus.

Nay penny pus?
Are we in second grade or trying to speak Latin?

By doing so, Clinton made the military's readyness and strength weaker than the time of Pearl Harber.
Because of the reckless military budget cut of Clinton, America became so weak, and invited terrorists to
attack America --- this is why 911 happened and over 3,000 of Americans were killed --- they were killed by Clinton.

War is expensive. If this were Clinton, the cost is much more. LOL

NiceGuyInNY123, that's a bluff (or a lie) and I'm calling you on it.

Show me proof that Clinton cut the military budget by 40 percent.
This happened when the meek and mild Republicans were asleep, right?

Send me some links to back up your nutty claims.

Also, blaming Clinton for 9-11?
That only works if you can show me clear, concrete steps that Bush took to correct things
between the time he took the oath till September 10th, 2001.

Cheney chaired the Terrorism Task Force and never once held a meeting. 
Not even once.

If Cheney didn't think terrorism was a problem after they got appointed to the Whiite House,
how do you blame Clinton in hindsight for the failures your boys suffered on 9-11?


Kidnapping their Wives
 I'm so proud to be an American today


The US Army in Iraq has at least twice seized and jailed the wives of suspected insurgents 
in hopes of "leveraging" their husbands into surrender, US military documents show. 

That's typical of the BFEE - they always go after the guy's wife.

In one case, a secretive task force locked up the young mother of a nursing baby. 
In the case of a second detainee, one American colonel suggested to another that they 
catch her husband by tacking a note to the family's door telling him "to come get his wife." 

The wife-kidnapping issue has taken on a higher profile since kidnappers seized Jill Carroll 
on Jan. 7 and threatened to kill her unless the Americans stopped kidnapping Iraqi women
and free the present kidnapped wives. 

When they re-tell these stories, the children will learn of Americans who kidnapped their mothers.
Then they'll see pictures of the sex abuse at Abu Graib, and the corpse photos of Ootie and Kootie.
Then they'll strap bombs to themselves and go find an American family to get a small measure of revenge.

Thanks George, for making the world safer.



"We'll continue to work with the folks down there. But I want to 
  remind the people in that part of the world, 85 billion dollars is a lot." 
   -- Der Monkey, talking about the Katrina-ravaged Gulf Coast, Link

 Monkey, how much of that $85B will go in to your pocket?


The Jellyfish Party
 Wed.  Jan 25th


I broke my longstanding policy of not donating money to political parties last fall when the folks
from the DNC called and asked for money to help gird them for the upcoming fights over judicial seats.
I was assured that indeed they would fight to keep right-wing extremists off the Supreme Court.

And now, faced with a clear-cut extremist (and dissembler) who is about to not only overturn the right
to obtain an abortion, but also to pave the path for an imperial executive branch with limitless powers ... nothing.

I'm not terribly inclined, as my readers know, to use profanity in my posts.
But if the Democratic Party wants any more of my money, they can just go fuck themselves.


Top 50 Loathsome Americans


43. Rush Limbaugh

Charges: Rather than engage in the admittedly difficult task of justifying GOP policies rationally, the key to
Limbaugh's success is attracting an audience that actually yearns to be lied to. It doesn't matter how many
righteous fact-checkers assail him in print and on the web, because dittoheads don't care that he's lying,
as long as the lies justify their prejudices. Limbaugh's program is not just hypocritical; it is a celebration of
hypocrisy for ignorant crackers, angry at smart people and strung out on the dwindling sensation that they
are better than everyone else by virtue of their race, sex, nationality or level of bluster, because their character
and accomplishments don't warrant such feelings. If political discussion were sex, the Limbaugh audience
would be a horde of virgins beating off to deranged rape fantasies.


Temporary Publicist Position

On February 1, we're entering the month of our tenth anniversary.
It was in February 1996 that issue 0001.htm was sent out as an e-mail.

I want to send an e-mail press release to many media outlets.
I want to see of we could get a shout out from Al Franken, Randi Rhodes, Mike Malloy etc.,
and maybe get a mention on some web sites, Buzzflash, Smirking Chimp, etc.

Also, does ten years make us the oldest anything?
Or should we play down the age thing, considering how many larger sites are younger than us?

So what I'm looking for is a 1-2 paragraph press release to send to possibly-interested people.
I'm not looking for any interviews or anything, just a mention would be fine.

Would you like to take stab at that?
Please put 'press release' in the subject header.


I've never seen it spelled out so completely and succinctly:
Democrats desperately need a heaping dose of  bartcop.com

Subject: election 2008

As to Hillary, I'm not real happy about her either and wouldn't vote for her in the primaries if she ran
(so far, Russ Feingold is my man).  However, if she won the nomination I'd be making calls and
knocking on doors as if she were Russ - heck, I'd be doing it if Joltin' Joe Lieberman was the
Democratic standard bearer.

The "worst" Democratic centrist is still better than the best Republican "compassionate conservative"
knuckledragger and as the old saying goes, vote with your heart in the primaries, vote with your head
in the general election.

Jim F

Jim, thank you for not being a illogical screaming ninny.
You won't be getting a Christmas card from Karl Rove.


You can be in BCR Show 88

Harry Reid, What's Your Excuse?
Why do we have a scared weenie running our party?


...Harry Reid shrugs his shoulders and says that there is nothing he can do to prevent a man who
believes that a Republican president is entitled to dictatorial powers, that there is nothing that
Harry Reid can do to prevent such a man from being seated on the Supreme Court.

We have been betrayed by our own party.

From now on, our first and only priorities are citizen patriots who stand up for the Constitution,
Democracy, Voting Rights, Justice, Honesty, Accountabilty -- Winning.


I'm not sure I get this.
All four of these people attacked Bush this week.

Subject:  goodbye


It's been an interesting ride.
However, too many straws have overwhelmed my fragile back,
so it is time to wish you good fortune and farewell.

I believe in the philosophies summarized in the Declaration of Independence.
You believe in them for white men living in the United States.

The rights of brown people are merely a political football for you to kick about when convenient,
the direction of the kicks also dependent on political covenience.

You dismay uncanny similarities to George W. Bush in many aspects.
You are willing to do or say anything to support your candidate of choice.
Anything that is, except to admit being wrong.

Your first choice when argered is to go to war.

You feel that trading 2900 hundred dead on 9-11 for 16 million
glassed Afghanis is a good, thought not sufficient, beginning..

You feel that the first criterion for acceptable torture is having dark skin
and living in a country which largely worships the wrong god.
Anything after that is merely a discussion opf where the line is drawn.

The final straw was your quietly removing the 'Die Nigger' graphic
without a word of explanation,
a tactic we've come to expect from the Limbaughs of the world.

Go, wish my best wishes.

I sincerely hope you eventually recognize how badly astray you've gone.
However, I doubt you have the constitution to ever realize that.

Peter Y

Yes, I'm a bad, bad man - and a racist pig.
After 1697 issues and 87 radio shows - you couldn't tell?


 Chapter Fifteen - Drummond Electronics

An elite Republican cabal, led by the Vice President, conspires
to steal the 2008 presidential election. Confronted with devastating
poll numbers from the disasterous Islamic War, it sets in motion
the ultimate October Surprise, a terrorist attack upon the nation.

Click to Enter

Subject: Oprah

Who gives a shit about Oprah and that con writer?
The Dallas News had that at the top of Page One as if it was important.

You of all people should know that it doesn't mean shit!

Dude, maintain low tones.

Bob, the subject is, "Does honesty mean anything anymore?"
I say that subject counts.


Just in time for Valentine's Day.
 Order by Feb 6 to guarantee delivery

Subject: Stern censorship


I have both XM and Sirius and I have listened to Stern every day since he came over to satellite radio.
His explanation is that he has a delay AT HIS REQUEST because he has to be sure that no one
on the show says anything libelous.  He has used it twice so far, for that very reason.
He says that no one at Sirius has told him that ANY subject or language is off-limits.

I had wondered about the issue of libelous statements and I figured that they must have thought of some way
to deal with that so I wasn't really surprised when he explained why he had a self-imposed delay on the show.

So far (cross your fingers!), neither Sirius nor the government is censoring Stern.

Bob P

Bob, I'm a Stern fan, but that sounds like complete horseshit.
I'm too smart to be a lawyer, but I'm sure all he'd have to do remind people at the start of each show
that they are in this for the comedy and from that minute on he's completely off the hook.

Parody is 100 percent legal and non-actionable, unless you can prove intent to harm.

Stern wants us to believe that Leno, Dave, Jon, Conan, Kimmel, SNL etc.
can't mention anybody by name because the party mentioned might sue?

I'll tell you what I think the real reason is, and he's mentioned this several times.
HE wants to do the cursing, just like I do right here on  bartcop.com

I almost always change cursing that's written in an email.  On BCR, those clumsy phone call edits
are my editing out all the "mother-effers" people say when they call the BartPhone.

I don't curse that often, but I want control of that line - I want to say how far is too far.

So, I think Howard is lying, and that's a bad thing to be doing
when you're claiming victory about having the freedom to say anything.

You lawyers out there - do you disagree?
Why is Stern the ONLY comic in the business who has to watch what he says?

 I'm a lawyer, Bart, and he's my professional opinion...

 You don't have to be a lawyer to have a comment.

Cheney has tons of Halliburton stock options.

It's profitable when your president starts a war for no reason,
then gives your company shiploads of no-bid contracts.



Have you made your TV signs yet for Bush's State of the Union speech?
There will be big prizes for the top few winners.

The speech is Tomorrow.




Subject: Hillary by the numbers

Short answer -- backing the front-runner brings Democrats nothing but trouble. 
Don't do it. 

 Joe H


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"Hard to believe that in my life I've had four presidents stolen from me. 
  John Kennedy, assassinated by bullet. Robert Kennedy, who would have won, 
  assassinated by bullet. Gore, politically assassinated by the Supreme Court. 
  Kerry, politically assassinated by Diebold." 
     --Straight Shooter,   Link


"Head-On" is now listed with iTunes and is
rebroadcast Tues-Fri at radiopower.org from 3-6 pm. ET.


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Plus a bartcop.com ovals and "I Miss Clinton" bonus sticker.
Three stickers for one donation!

The 2006 bartcop.com stickers are in.

Cindy Sheehan Threatens Feinstein


Cindy Sheehan has decided to run against Diane Feinstein if Feinstein does not filibuster Alito.
Sheehan made that announcement from Venezuela where she is attending the World Social Forum.

Sheehan is quoted to have said, "I'm appalled that Diane Feinstein wouldn't recognize how dangerous
Alito's nomination is to upholding the values of our constitution. and restricting the usurpation of
presidential powers, for which I've already paid the ultimate price.".


Subject:  bad business

They could run a ticket with Katherine Harris and Mary Bono 
and they'd still win in a landslide... 
because they own the voting machines...
they stole my fucking democracy and I want it back.



Marty's Entertainment Page

always has good stuff.


"Kidnapping innocent women and children in order to put pressure on their husbands or relatives.
  In Rumsfeld's military, the United States now uses the tactic. Sure, it's against the Geneva Conventions. 
  But King George doesn't have to obey the law; and his military can do anything they want." 
   -- Andrew Sullivan, losing faith in his uber hero Godly Bush,  Link


Subject: Guy James Show needs help

Bart, please consider a note on your page alerting readers to the plight of the Guy James Show in Florida,
and streamed on the White Rose Society archive.  He is off the air. local radio will no longer air his program.
It is top notch talk, right up there with Bob Kinkaid and Bart Cop!!

I think the liberal / progressive "family" needs to get together on this,
we need all the quality voices we can get!

For more details please visit  www.theguyjamesshow.com

Thanks Bart
Rick from Wisco



Why your kids should smoke
   by Andrew Sullivan


These kinds of campaigns have worked brilliantly against smoking and cigarette advertising. 
Demonising "Big Tobacco" has been one of the most successful puritanical campaigns since prohibition. 
Millions of Americans, completely unaware that smoking might actually harm them, have been forced to 
seek redress through the court system. What else were they going to do? Read the massive-print warnings 
on the cigarette boxes? But at least you could argue that someone else's smoke physically harms, or at the 
very least irritates, a non-smoker. 


Subject: Bart, you're a money-loving conservative. And fuck you.

Thanks, fucker. 
Two weeks ago I sent you virtually the same exact Wiretap! image 

but I guess it wasn't good enough to publish until someone paid for it.

Well, who'd have figured you for a Republican.
And I actually believed you were my friend. 
Fuck you.

I'm a bad, bad man.
If I missed your toon, it's because I'm a back-stabber who loves Bush?

I have 4557 unread messages in the large mail folder.
I wish I had time to read and reply to every e-mail.

The person who "stole your thunder" didn't send me any money.
Why would you assume he or she did?

Why do people assign the most vile motives if their toon doesn't get published?
And this didn't happen, but if two toons come in, and I like the other one better,
how does that make me a back-stabbing bastard to scream "Fuck you" at?

Sweat to Koresh, a day doesn't go by that a "friend" doesn't to accuse me of either 
being Rush Limbaugh or George W. Bush, and over time, that can be somewhat tiring.

That black fella, Peter Y, who called me a racist?
If I'm not mistaken, he's been reading the entire ten years.
and now I'm a racist pig who hates black people?

Too bad there's no money in being called a back-stabbing, racist traitor.
I could retire.


TV Stuff

Did you see Faye Dunaway's fantastic Norma Desmond performance on CSI?
It's been sixty years since we saw the last, great, "I'm ready for my close-up."

...not deserving of a shot of Chinaco, ming you, but I really enjoyed that
so we'll go a shot of Grey Goose for Faye Dunaway hitting her home run on CSI.

They say, ...she lost her career because she was so f-ing great in Mommie Dearest.
I've never seen it, but they say she was so good that the audience hated her and never forgave her.

Also, ever heard of a show called Beauty and the Geek?
Produced by Demi's husband, gotcha boy from 'Punk'd', Ashton Kutcher.
One of the geeks they had (He's off the Island now) was the world record holder for Rubik's Cube.

This guy's brain is so geek-wired, he look at a scrambled Rubik's cube, then memorizes the color blocks,
then puts the cube behind his back and unscrambles in in - brace yourselves - twelve seconds.

I saw it myself, and I know what you're thinking, "camera tricks," but no,
I'll bet my not-so-hard-earned money that this guy is the real deal.

Shit, I tried a Rubik's Cube a time or two and said "F this" about a minute later.
This guy's brain can decode those colors like nothing - and Bart was Mongo-impressed.

Monday night on 24 - "Jack manhandles a prisoner in order to obtain information;"
Can't wait for that - you know how much I loooooooooove the torture...

Monday, Randi Rhodes will be dissing that fascist Scalito on Larry King!

        "Dat's right!"


Bush bullies hiding  bartcop.com  from you?

Surf anonymously
by entering bartcop.com at

Obama Criticizes Filibuster 


To more effectively oppose Supreme Court nominees in the future, Democrats need to convince the public 
"their values are at stake" rather than use stalling tactics to try to thwart the president, said Barack Obama
He said that an effort to try to block a final vote on Alito would fail on Monday. That would clear the way for
Senate approval Tuesday of the federal appeals court judge who will deny women their right to choose.

"We need to recognize, because Judge Alito will be confirmed, that, if we're going to oppose a nominee 
that we've got to persuade the American people that, in fact, their values are at stake," Obama said.

OK, Barack, and what have you done to persuade people of that?
What are you going to tell the poor women of Illinois when Bush & Scalito make abortion a crime?


Subject: BCR 87

It was good to hear OUR good friend Barry Crimmins on BCR 87 Part 3.
Barry and A. Whitney Brown came to Hannibal about 5 days before election 2004.
They did a fund raiser down at Java Jive.  (artist owned coffee shop)
I got to have dinner with Barry and a few local Dem folks. 
Got a signed copy of his book for me and my siblings.
He is an interesting character. 
Also spent some time talking with A. Whitney about your site and Kos, etc.

Anyway, Barry's year end wrap up was great as well as the rest of BCR 87
I can't get enough!
I listen to the show many times and have converted some apathetic non voters by playing it for them.
Thanks again for all of the Hammering!

Your good friend,
Robert the Artist


"I'm trade young men for oil."

 Iraq pumps 2,000,000 barrels a day,
(and that was before the 2002 Halliburton Upgrade)
 times today's oil price which is  $67.76 a barrel
makes $135,520,000 Bush stole just yesterday

2239   2242 have died for Bush's oil greed

How many more, Monkey?

Bush's gusher of blood.


Kick me, I'm a Democrat


It's time once again to play Kick the Democrats. Everyone can play, including Democrats. The rules are simple. 
When Republicans lose elections, it is because they didn't get enough votes. When Democrats lose elections, 
it is because they have lost their principles and lost their way. Or they have kept their principles, which is an 
even worse mistake...There is always a pick-up game of Kick the Democrats going on somewhere. But something 
about the Alito confirmation - the pathetic and apparently surprising inability of 45 Democratic senators to stop 
55 Republicans from approving anyone they want - seems to have made the game suddenly a lot more popular."

Attacking each other?

That doesn't happen - does it?


Subject: Hillary

It's not that I think Hillary can beat the GOP election-theft machine,
nor singlehandedly tow a recalcitrant Dem party like Jack LaLanne pulling a barge;
it's that I don't see anyone else who can.

Tom Buck


Subject: Oprah-Frey

Do you think she may have sandbagged him?

I vote no.
I think she was the biggest thing in his life (fer sure) and I'll bet they called him and said,
"You gotta come clean, and she's not going to go easy on you," and to the liar's credit,
he showed up and mostly took his medicine like a man.

I have a big thing in BCR 88 about this.

Pretending at first that it was no big deal only to apologize to us and then go after him on the show.
You said he looked surprised.

Yeah, the guy looked kinda nervous because Oprah wasn't kidding around.

I wonder if he would have appeared on her show if he knew what was coming?

keep it swingin'
Beth in Reno

Beth, I vote yes.


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Kristen Kreuk in 'Smallville'


The 100th episode of the WB series "Smallville" opened with a shocker: 
Clark (Tom Welling), tired of hiding his superpowers secret from Lana (Kristin Kreuk), reveals his secret. 


Thank you to bartcop.com  subscribers.
I know you work hard for your money, so I take it as
a compliment when you throw some my way each month.

 Read the  Previous Issue

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