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Thursday  Feb 16, 2006   Volume 1710 - Too drunk to hunt

Quote of the Day

"Go Fuck yourself, America? Is that what 
  Cheney was thinking? Maybe he figured, 
"if it was good enough retort for Pat Leahy, 
  it is good enough to tryout on America." 
     -- Larry Johnson,   Link

In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Betrayed w/ a Kiss 
Able Danger x 13 
"I shot my friend" 
Pull yer Head Out
Hume the Whore 
Cool Hand Dick
Poker with Cheney 
Can't Discuss Leak 
Redford Slams Paris 



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"There was so much snow in Washington, D.C.,
  Dick Cheney shot a fat guy thinking he was a polar bear.
     -- Leno


Democratic Leaders 'Betray' Hackett
  by Robert Parry  as seen on consortiumnews.com


The Democrats are even more galling. They seem zeroed in on both doing what's wrong and what's stupid.
The latest example is the party leadership's "success" in driving Paul Hackett out of the Ohio Senate race
apparently because he speaks his mind too much and takes the fight directly to the Republicans.

Instead, Democratic Senate leaders, hoping to win in Ohio by default because of Republican disarray,
opted for an establishment Democrat, Sherrod Brown, a seven-term congressman who has raised
$2.37 million, tenfold more money than outsider Hackett.

But by settling on a business-as-usual strategy, Democratic leaders offended the idealism - and fighting spirit
- of their base and may have ultimately hurt their chances for victory in November, a lose-lose strategy that
has become all too familiar for Democrats.

What if we took senate Democrats to Yellowstone and turned them loose with the grizzley's?
Would they show any instincts for self-preservation?
Or would they pour ketchup on themselves, find a bear and say, "Eat me?"

Note: consortiumnews.com  is the most important site on the internet


'Able Danger' ID'd Atta 13 Times
  They knew about the USS Cole in advance, too


Pre-Sept. 11 intelligence by a secret military unit identified Mohamed Atta 13 different times, a congressman said Tuesday.

Rep. Curt Weldon, R-Pa., said the unit — code-named "Able Danger" — also identified "a problem" in Yemen two weeks
before the attack on the     USS Cole. It knew the problem was tied into the port of Aden and involved a U.S. platform,
but the ship commander was not made aware of it, Weldon said.  The Cole bombing killed 17 sailors on Oct. 12, 2000.

If anyone had told the Cole's commander that there was any indication of a problem in Aden, "he would not have gone there,"
Weldon told reporters. "He had no clue."



"Can you imagine the outcry from the right wingers if Al Gore shot a guy? 
Rush Limbaugh, et al, saw scandal and conspiracy when the Clintons went to church. 
Republicans would have been calling for congressional hearings. The cable whores
would have had special graphics in place, and ominious theme music playing every 
time they went to a commercial." 
  -- JBK,   Link


Subject: gambling

Overall we'd be very much better off without it.
When I figure out how to get rid of it, I'll let you know.
Meanwhile, you're not making the world better if you promote it.

Al C

I don't know that I "promote" gambling, but I do have opinions.
Mind of I express them?


Der "I-don't-know-the-man" Monkey and Jack Abramoff

Cheney: "I shot my friend"


Four days after shooting a friend and then trying to prevent us from finding out, Dick Cheney poured
his heart out by answering edited, softball questions from Brit Hume, his first wife of FOX Whore News.

Sobbing like a recovering crack whore on Oprah, Cheney confessed, "That was my finger on the gun,
I pulled the trigger and even the great Karl Rove can't figure a way to blame this mess on Bill Clinton."
Cheney got off-script and admitted drinking beer prior to demonstrating "depraved indifference" to human life.

Armstrong, Cheney's new spokeswoman, told CNN that she never saw Cheney or Whittington "drink at all
until after the accident occurred, when the vice president fixed himself a cocktail back at the house."

Old lawyer's trick.
When you committ a crime drunk, hide from police and drink even more, thus preventing the cops from
knowing how drunk you were when you pulled the trigger and almost (and may still) kill somebody.

Hillarious Sidebar:
Tuesday night on Larry King, former handjob Alan Simpson scolded late night comics
for getting so much mileage out of Cheney's misery on this "most sensitive subject."

  "Dat's what he said!"

Alan, this is the "Go fuck yourself," Vice President.
This is the "I'm damn proud that I told Senator Leahy to go fuck himself," vice president.
This is the arrogant asshole who barks orders at the Pinhead in Chief, who lied us into war,
outed Valeri Plame and instructed Der Monkey to rape the Constitution.

Forgive us for not being "properly sensitive" after the heartless bastard shot a guy.


American intergrity, American values
on display for all the world to see.


"I'm just not going to go back through it again. You're welcome to 
  continue to focus on these issues. I'm moving on." 
       -- Scottie the Underbear, who knew Cheney's victim suffered a heart attack, 
           but, as always, he witheld that info from the White House Press Corp,    Link


Hume the Whore Draws Criticism


Cheney's choice of Fox "We Love Cheney" News to break his silence about shooting that poor bhastard
had other media whores types talking, particularly among whores who see Fox for what they are.

"They're whores for the Republican Party," Paul Begala might've said. 
"It's like Khrushchev giving an interview to Pravda."
Even Bill O'Reilly called the handjob "the media out of control."

Said CNN's Jack Cafferty: "It wasn't a profile in courage for Bush to go to the F-word network
for a sit-down with Brit Hume. That's a little like Bonnie interviewing Clyde, ain't it?"



"Who's calling the shots at the White House? Dick Cheney, of course. There are lots of lessons 
 to be learned from the Cheney shooting and the ensuing press blackout. But the evidence suggests 
 that Cheney isn't interested in learning any of them. Instead, the public is getting an opportunity 
 to learn some lessons about Cheney. And lesson number one is that Cheney gets his way." 
      -- Dan Froomkin,    Link


Subject:  9-11

Why did Bush claim on two different occasions to having watched the first plane hit the first building
BEFORE entering that classroom?  There are only two possibilities....a)  They were in on it or let it happen
b)  Bush lied to score PR points by trying to be amusing.

a)  With the plane hitting at 8:46am and him entering the classroom around 9:00am....He either had to watch it
in the Presidential limo or in the hallway prior to entering the classroom.  Seeing as no network broadcast footage
of the first plane hitting the first building until hours later when that first video popped up...it had to have been the limo
.....a live feed.....and Bush smiling from ear to ear because all of his political draeams came true.

b)  Bush went into detail about how he felt entering the classroom after viewing such a tragic event and how he felt.
Lying to children to score political points by politicizing 9/11?  But then why the detail?  Can't be a slip up...too much
detail of him thinking about the event prior to entering the classroom.

MM some

MM, the press let Bush get away with other lies that day, too.
That day, Bush said, "When I saw that first plane hit, I thought, 'That's one bad pilot.' "

Later, the press allowed Bush to change that to, "Right away, I knew America was under attack."
That makes the simpleton/coward sound like a man of action - what a joke.

We'll never get the truth because the press's job is to bury the truth.


Cool Hand Dick


CRIME 1: The Dick refused to talk to a deputy sheriff when he came to the ranch at 8pm; not until 8am,
14 ½ hours after the accident did he make a statement… or long enough for the alcohol to burn off.
When rich powerful people (or just average Joes) get together for shooting or boating or golfing, they usually
get plastered as they celebrate their mastery of the universe. MSNBC had a now-deleted quote from Armstrong
"There may have been beer available during a picnic lunch that preceded the incident.
There may be a beer or two in there," she said…."


Be a part of Bartcop Radio

Bush callers welcome


"There's no such thing as an accident when it comes to firearms. 
  You or someone has to pull the trigger; it doesn't go off by itself." 
    -- Hunter education instructor Bob Lytle of Boise,  Link

 Cheney says, "YOU can't blame Harry Whittington for this shooting." 


Subject: Mike Malloy comment

And I agree 100%.

The GOP caters to their BASE.
The Democrats foolishly puts their base down and tries to woo those who will never come aboard.

And guess what?  You are losing your base.
And stop advertising for Mike Malloy -- he is NOT like you.

Shell, how many crabby pills did you eat this morning?

I think "my base" can handle a little honesty.
I have opinions, I back them up.

And I'll advertise for anybody I damn well please.


Subject: Can't act

Do you think that Tom Cruise could play a delusional cult member who is bisexual 
and can almost act like he wants to be with a woman more?

Carson the monkey man

If Tom Cruise fell in a lake, I doubt he could act wet.

Hey Tom, I'll give you some free advice:
Instead of insisting to any press outlet that will have you 
that you two are still engaged, why not marry the girl?
What the hell are you waiting for?

Also, is this going to be one of those Michael Jackson deals 
where you buy the baby and forbid Katie to see it?


Clinton on killing caged Birds


Bill Clinton can't resist peppering Cheney with a little common sense after the Veep's hunting accident. 
Bill allowed that we should cut Cheney some slack if he was hunting "where wild birds land," where 
"you've got to rustle them up and they fly fast. A lot of times you can't see them on the ground, and you 
do turn and fire. But then there's the kind of place where Cheney's known to hunt - where, Clinton noted, 
"They raise the quail on a farm." He added: 'It's hardly a sport. The quail are slow. You have to stomp on 
the ground to get them to get up and fly. And you can't not get your limit. If it was that kind of farm, then, 
whatever the facts are, the Vice President shouldn't have done that. Because he was going to get his limit.'"


Subject: Was Cheney on a double date in the woods?

Do you find it odd that two men are out hunting with two women not their wives?
Maybe this is the reason for the WH cover up?

The four in the hunting party were: Cheney, the guy he shot, the divorced Katharine Armstrong

 "If you're Cheney's age, I'm hot."

and Pamela Willeford, Ambassador to Chocolateland.

Before you say it's sleazy to ask this, think about what the press
would be reporting if it were John Kerry instead of Dick Cheney

I don't want to slime all hunters, but the men I've known who "went hunting" were hunting for girls.

You tell your wife, "You'd hate it - we'll be in the woods all weekend, drinking whiskey, covered with 
deer feces, it'll be cold and no bathrooms and guns going off - and lots of hiking long distances..."
so the wives bows out while the men drive to another town and pick up some high-mileage pit woofers in a bar.

This isn't all hunters, just the ones I know in Oklahoma.


Proud to be an American?
This administration has a "torture ass" fetish.

This guy had eight punctures 
(small caliber bullet holes?) in his ass
because he was captured by America.
Where's Lee Greenwood?

Sleazy - Pull yer Head Out


Confronted by Judas Maximus with the news that fiery Moqtada al-Sadr was the kingmaker in the 
selection of Iraq's next prime minister, Rice replied sanguinely, "Iraq is a complex place, there's a lot of voices."

But as Stephanopoulos pointed out, the voice in question has been raised to offer military support to Rice's nemeses, 
Syria and Iran. In Syria, al-Sadr pledged to fight in "the defense against our common enemies" -- the United States, 
Britain and Israel. Visiting Tehran, he offered the support of Iraqi fighters in the event of an attack by the United States 
over the issue of Iran's nuclear program, stating unequivocally, "If neighboring Islamic countries, including Iran, become 
the targets of attacks, we will support them." 

Rice  is someone I knew to be a very bright scholar back when we were both in Stanford's arms-control seminar. 
Yes, we differed on occasion, but I never had cause to doubt her ability to reason. Now, I do.


Subject: yes or no


It would follow, therefore that anyone who considers your "slap leather, or go home" question to be addressed
to them, should consider themselves half-wits who can only prove themselves otherwise by having "the courage
to answer that question", thereby, according to you, automatically redeeming themselves since an honest answer
would align them w/ Sen. Clinton, in spite of themselves.

No matter how you slice it, no matter how complicated some people want to make this, saying
"Bring the troops home right now - no excuses, just do it" is a yes-or-no question.


Cheney Says He Can't Discuss CIA Leak Case


"'It's nothing I can talk about,' Cheney said in an interview with Fox Whore News. 
'I may well be called as a witness at some point in the case and it's, therefore, 
inappropriate for me to comment on any facet of the case.'"

They just pick and choose which laws must be obeyed.
Hey Dick, why not just pass asecret law that you can talk about anything?



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Army Girls Gone Wild

Subject: I never knew bartcop was gay

Bart, Wow, I have been checking the site for years and never knew you were gay.
How many gay clubs do you belong too? You learn something new everyday.
I'll be sure to let my friends in on it.
Take care.

Que Ball

ha ha
Yeah, I turned gay the day Hillary murdered Bill.

Did you intend to throw me into an insane rage?
Republicans come apart when someone calls them gay, not Democrats.

Funny, Clinton never hired a gay shill with a fake name for the WH press corps.
Your Tool did that.


Marty's Entertainment Page

always has good stuff.

Click Dick to hear him sing
(Note: Cheney uses bad language)

Subject: another 9-11 e-mail


How can you make comments like  " ...and the Rose Law Firm billing records didn't kill 3,000 Americans ",
implying that you agree with the official Bush/Cheney conspiracy theory that 19 Arab hijackers killed 3,000 Americans
under Bin Ladens orders even after you have been persuaded to look at the facts by dozens of your readers?

So you have a theory about 9-11?
Are you going to make me guess what it is?

I don't buy your argument that unless a big political or media figure gets behind the true story of 9/11
then the truth is a moot point and we should all just parrot the story Bush/Cheney has given us.

ha ha
*I* said the truth is a moot point?
If you can make that stick I'll give you a car.

I have a question for you:
Why do people fabricate wild-ass quotes and then demand that I take responsibility for them?


Cheney Claims He Has Power to Declassify Info


Cheney disclosed Wednesday that he has the power to declassify sensitive government information, 
authority that could set up a criminal defense for "Scooter" Libby. Cheney's disclosure comes a week after 
reports that Libby testified under oath he was authorized by superiors in 2003 to disclose highly sensitive 
prewar information to reporters. The information, about Iraq and alleged weapons of mass destruction, 
was used by the Bush administration to bolster its case for invading Iraq.

So, after denying for years that they were guilty, now they say 
that they had the legal power to break the law all along. 

How many other "secret laws" have they passed?
We won't find out until they're caught breaking them.

When playing poker with Unka Dick, after the players have gone "all in,"
he reveals that there's a new rule that a ten, king, two, five seven beats a full house.

These bastards belong behind bars.

      "Always rocking the boat!   Bart, you're no patriot!"


Subject: unfair Bush/Hitler comparison

How could they compare Bush to Hitler?
That's crazy!

Hitler was an eloquent speaker.


"I'm trade young men for oil."

 Iraq pumps 2,000,000 barrels a day,
(and that was before the 2002 Halliburton Upgrade)
 times today's oil price which is  $59.25 a barrel
makes $119,500,000 Bush stole just yesterday

2269   2274 have died for his oil hardon

Bush's gusher of blood.



"The general rolling over on the part of the American press allowed the war to happen. 
   The press is extremely chastened by that.  I think we all know how bad it was." 
       -- Daniel Okrent, pretending the press now gets it    Link


Subject: Zarcow ee!

Bart, Bart, Bart...
You don't seriously think the Iraqis would fall into lockstep behind a Jordanian Sunni.
They barely tolerate his presence there now (some don't).


 <Big exhale...>

David, when did I say, "The Iraqis would fall into lockstep behind a Jordanian Sunni?"

The answer is - I didn't say that.
You kinda, sorta made that up, and then asked me to I explain why I said it.

Y'know, there's a nifty tool called "right click and copy."
That allows you to quote what I said, not what you think you might remember.

What I said was:

> Zarqawi and his merry men are running circles around our military,
> so I assume they could easily dominate the people of Iraq once we leave.

Maybe I need a few days off, to clear my punchdrunk mind...


TV Stuff

American Idol - all three judges are sadistic bastards.

These kids are hanging on an emotional cliff - they're either going to be TV stars or pathetic losers,
so the judges say to them, "I'm sorry..."  and after the contestant starts to cry, they say,
"We're sorry you're coming back tomorrow - because you're a winner."
It's cruelty for the sake of cruelty - but what else can we expect from FOX?

It reminds me of young boy Bush pushing firecrackers up a frog's ass
and then throwing the frog in the air so he can catch the "beautiful crimson spray."

BTW, Idol, Grey's Anatomy, Lost and Housewives are all kicking Olympic ass in the ratings.
Nobody wants to watch winter sports - why can't NBC understand that?
Hell, I'll bet Dancing with the Stars beats the Olympics tonight.

Meanwhile, CBS is punting with a reruns of C.S.I. and Trace tonight. 
They don't want to win?
Is CBS run by Democrats?

George Clooney to defend Free Speech tonight on Larry King

         "Dat's right!"

Maybe Brad Pitt will drop by?


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"Blind faith in Bush is the very opposite of all that which conservatism has stood for for the last four decades. 
The anti-government ethos espoused by Barry Goldwater and even Ronald Reagan is wholly unrecognizable 
in Bush followers, who - at least thus far - have discovered no limits on the powers that ought to be vested in 
George Bush to enable him "to do good" on behalf of all of us. And in that regard, people like Michelle Malkin
and Jonah Goldberg are not conservatives. They are authoritarian cultists. Their allegiance is not to any principles 
of government but to Bush. The rage-based reverence for Bush -- and the creepy, blind faith vested in his goodness
-- is not a movement I recognize as being conservative or even American."
       -- Glenn Greenwald,   Link


Subject: WTF are you talking about - a billion dollars a week?

This is your shakiest argument yet. (and that's saying something).

Dude, feel free to list all my "shaky arguments" then please, ...put me in my place.

For the last 165 issues in a row, I've done the math for you.

 Iraq pumps 2,000,000 barrels a day,
(and that was before the 2002 Halliburton Upgrade)
 times today's oil price (which can be)  $70.00 a barrel
 makes $140,000,000 Bush stole just yesterday

 Dude, what's $140 M times seven?
 I'll help you out - it's $980,000,000 dollars (I stretched that to $1 billion to save time)

You don't even have to use your brain - all you have to do is recognize numbers
and letters in a certain order that spell out the obvious - a billion dollars a week.

If you don't believe me, believe them  Click  Here

Some people disagree.  I have included a BRIEF rebuttal.
The logic seems pretty strong to me.  Nor is this a new theory.
I'd like to see where in your archives you called Murtha a 'leftie'.

Yeah, me, too.
If I did, I was saying "Bush and his whore media are making Murtha out to be Jane Fonda."

A poll recently conducted shows that over 80% of Iraqis are strongly opposed to coalition troops,
and about 45% of the Iraqi population believe attacks against American troops are justified.

Oh, really?
I thought they loved us over there.

Who do you think you're talking to?

I believe we need to turn Iraq over to the Iraqis.

Duh, really?

Pro-gun, pro-torture, pro-war……….
It's almost as if they bought you too $$$?????

Lewis Jones

Lewis, you forgot, "Bush's pawn and a big fan of Rush Limbaugh."

I wonder how long it will take for me to go 24 hours without reading what a
warmongering, Bush-loving, blood-thirsty, Rush-loving, right-wing Republican I am?

Yep, a few days off is just what I need...


 Call the all new, toll-free 
 GOP callers Welcome (snicker)

Roth: Van Halen Reunion Would Rock

     "I can still sing - honest."


If Van Halen really plans to seek a new lead singer through CBS's "Rock Star" reality show,
their first lead singer wants them to know he thinks it's a monumentally stupid idea.

David Lee Roth, the oldest of the Van halen singers and playing Stern-wannabe in New York,
said yesterday on "Roth Radio" that he has a better idea: They should hire him to tour with them.

"I want this so bad," said Roth. "I really need this job.
 No one will pay respect to what I do unless I'm with these guys."


Subject: courage to respond, but not courage to publish response

Please don't tease me about my cowardice - because I'll cry.

You wrote:

> Zarqawi and his merry men are running circles around our military,
> so I assume they could easily dominate the people of Iraq once we leave.

That's a pretty big assumption that you use to justify gambling
another $2 trillion and another 20,000 dead and wounded on.

Betting on continued chaos in the Middle Easy is hardly a gamble.
God ordered them to kill each other, They're just doing what they were told.

If Iraq isn't safe with the US military enforcing martial law,
what makes you think it'll be any safer after the local handjobs take over?


Redford Slams Paris Hilton For Partying
 How dare she have a good time in Redford's state...


Redford said his annual independent film event is becoming "too intense" for him,
and that he was not around for the festival's duration this year.

"To the outside world, it's a big fat market where you have people like Paris Hilton going to parties," 
Redford told Newsweek. "Now, she doesn't have anything to do with anything. I think the festival is 
close to being out of control. I may have to kill myself over this."


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