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WELCOME TO BARTCOP.COM A modem, a smart mouth and the truthNews and Commentary NOT Approved by Karl Rove, bcause vicious extremists can NOT be appeased.

BCR 151 is Here!HOT

Thurs-Friday    April 16-17, 2009  Vol 2319 - Pirate Paradise

Quote of the Day

"The Right have been smearing Democrats 
  on all channels for the last twenty years–and 
  the country is more Democratic than ever. 
  Flame on, wingers." 
       -- Perry Logan,    Link


In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Arrow Agenda for Tea Bag Party 
Arrow NYWT's American Blind Spot HOT
Arrow MN Wants Franken Seated HOT
Arrow Goodbye newspapers HOT
Arrow Random thoughts...
Arrow How Stupid is Stymie? HOT
Arrow Republican Pants On Fire 
Arrow Louise can't make it? HOT


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"The mainstream media doesn't get it. They'll report on the tea parties just as a -- you know, oh, they're just 
a bunch of whack job Republicans who only care about taxes on the rich. Where were they with George Bush?
...But the tea parties are not about taxes. They are about the reason for the taxes, which is an out-of-control 
government that cannot control its own spending." 
     --  Glenn Beck (R-Nimrod)   Link

 Butt Monkey, if Bush hadn't spent us into bankruptcy,
 if Bush's "deregulate everything" didn't give Wall Street a license to steal,
 Obama wouldn't be spending the money trying to correct the problems.

 Again - what's YOUR solution?
 Sit back and allow 10-15% unemployment to strangle America for 10-15 years?
 Sit back and allow Detroit and the banks to go under?

 We got here thru bad GOP policies and tax cuts for the rich.
 Why do you think more of that is the cure?

 It's like if the GOP ran Sober House, they'd be giving Gary Busey cocaine and vodka 
 to help him beat his addictions and then act shocked when things get worse.  

 GOP policies are guaranteed to fail.
 If only we could get the Democrats to mention that.

   Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

Agenda for Tea Bagging Publican Party

7:00 "I Am a Fat Drug Addict" speech presented by Rush Limbaugh
7:15  Burning Gays, Blacks and Illegal Immigrants in effigy celebration
7:30 "I don’t believe in Social Security but where is my corporate tax break?" seminar
7:45 "Make Hate work for You" speech by Michelle Bachmann
8:00 "My Daughter, My Virgin" by Sarah Palin
8:15  Book Burning
8:30  Cross Burning followed by silent prayer for the soul of our nation


  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

 Subject: piracy - I can explain that, Bart


Different countries have different laws, and many of them won't allow you to bring your guns into their ports aboard
your ship or boat or yacht. So as long as you sail from Miami for a three hour tour of the west coast of Africa, you're fine.
But the minute you sail into port, you run the rish of being put into some third world jail for gunrunning.

That's why we have navies. The navy's first job is to fight pirates, and fighting pirates, as far as I know, does not require
an act of Congress. The Navy and the Coast Guard interdict drug runners all the time, board them, confiscate everything.
So why can't the Navy blows these Somali pirates out of the water? They're buzzing around in fucking rubber dinghies
with AK-47s, for Koresh's sake, and there doesn't seem to be anything we can do about them.

My original point still stands. Logic says these African hillbillies should have been toast long ago. They seem able to take ships
almost at will, even giant tankers, using little more than fishing boats. The only explanation that makes any sense is that they are
able to do it because they are allowed to do it. Somebody is protecting them, and it isn't the government of Somalia, because
there isn't a government in Somalia. Somebody with a hell of a lot of pull and power is making a ton of money off this.
That's the only reason it has been allowed to go on for this long.


I would not sail to a country that wouldn't allow self-protection on the high seas.
What are they, crazy?

That means they'll only invite the weak and the helpless to visit.
That's Pirate Paradise - they'll wait for these helpless sheep to sail into their arms..

Sailing near Africa these days is like walking thru East LA at night, alone.

BTW, if you know a way to sail from Miami to Africa in 3 hours I'm sure
I can make us both multi-gazillionaires in just a few weeks - we need to talk :)

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog



"These tea parties are a sham because they're directed by lobbyists here in D.C...And you've got Fox News, 
  pushing this, promoting this with all of its heart. And it is not a grassroots movement when you have Neil Cavuto, 
  Glenn Beck, Greta Van Susteren promoting this up the wazoo. That is not a grassroots movement."
     --  --Faiz Shakir, on Fox Business,   Link

   Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

NYWT's American Blind Spot
  by Bob Parry


The NYWTimes notes that the ABA – in a futile effort to get itself back into the good graces of Bushies
– began to give unwarranted high marks to right-wing nominees as a way to shake its “liberal” label.

“The group regularly gave ‘well qualified’ and ‘qualified’ ratings to some of  Bush’s most deeply flawed nominees,”
the editorial said. “Conservatives will undoubtedly keep trying to intimidate the ABA. The group’s screeners should
evaluate the Obama nominees based on their qualifications, judicial temperament and views of the law – without
imposing any ideological litmus test.”

Yet what the Times described about the ABA’s pandering to the Right is exactly what the New York Times
and other mainstream news organizations have done for almost three decades.

There he goes again - telling the truth and making sense.

There's a part of me that wants to start believing in Bob Parry again.
What's your opinion on this subject?

Is Bob Parry back to sanity?
Or is he likely to slip back into the Bob Parry of 2008?

Is Bob Parry past his Pon farr?

It figures - still nothing on Wikipedia on Dr. Julius Youngner or Lt. Dickie Best,
two men who delivered impossible-to-measure greatness for their country and the world,
but they have plenty of info on fictional Vulcan diseases from Star Trek..

Maybe they should stop billing themselves as "a free encyclopedia,"
and change that to "a site with a shitload of fun stuff."

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

We're on Twitter

Look for  bartcop


"Most of your right-wing rant-jockeys like Scarborough, Pigboy and Hannity are really thin-skinned prima donas 
who wake up daily in search of something...anything...to be offended about. They make their living p*ssing and moaning 
about imaginary stuff. This is why they are generally more vitriolic and dangerous when their party is the minority
...they can find more imaginary stuff to take offense at."  
    -- Tom ,   Link

 Do you think they secretly wanted Obama to win?
 How relieved they must be, no longer tasked with defending the litany of Bush disasters.

   Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

MN Wants Franken Seated
They want crybaby Coleman to stop being an ass


A new survey of Minnesota finds a clear verdict on the part of the state's voters: They want Norm Coleman to concede defeat,
and Al Franken to be sworn in. The poll was conducted in the aftermath of the election court's ruling that Franken won the race.

By a 63%-37% margin, voters say that Coleman should toss off, rather than continue to appeal.  They say by a 59%-41% margin
that Franken should be seated immediately, rather than allow the seat to stay vacant. And by a 59%-41% margin, they say that
Republican Gov. Tim Pawlenty (Bridge collapse) should sign a certificate of election.

   Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!


"I could see how conservatives might be concerned that they could potentially be lumped in with the 
crazed right-wing militia members that are cited as potential violence risks in a new report from the 
Department of Homeland Security. But the conservative reaction is to do the lumping themselves. 
Michelle Malkin has a blog post decrying "The Obama DHS hit job on conservatives." Conservatives? 
The report is about murderous lunatics.  Michelle Malkin calls potential terrorists "conservatives."
     --  Jonathan Chait,    Link

    Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

 Subject: tea baggin'

This is from my mother-in-law. 

She attended her towns "teabaggin" party. 
Good thing they have their Guns God and Glory!! 
'Cause who needs education right??   LOL
Keep up the awesome work,
Lauren C

  Send e-mail to Bart  | Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

Random thoughts...

We were forced to watch the racist/sexist US Open Sunday in the hospital because The Amazing Race
follows it (one of Mrs Bart's faves) and whore CBS usually fails to deliver their shows when promised.

They kept showing the leaderboard and I looked for Mr. Perfect's name - but no sign of Eldrick.
I suppose he took last week off?

And then - finally - there was the presentation of that dumbass green jacket.

Some say the Kentucky Derby is the most exciting two minutes in sports - I disagree.
For me, it's a ceremony where some guy we never heard of puts on a green jacket.

  Send e-mail to Bart  | Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

Why newspapers are like department stores
  by the great Gene Lyons


Everybody's habits are different, but hardly anybody is a front-to-back newspaper reader anymore. There are too many other 
sources of information and entertainment, including your local paper's own Web site, which, unlike the print edition, is probably free. 
Advertisers have noticed that too, and particularly during the current economic downturn are taking their business elsewhere.

Meanwhile, the costs of printing and delivering newspapers keep rising, making it increasingly hard for publishers to compete. 
Back when they started giving content away free online, even a financial nimrod like me wondered how they expected to do that 
and make money. Increased Internet speed and portability seem to have made it clear they cannot.

Internet users, however, basically refuse to pay. So far, online advertising rates come nowhere near paying for the costs of running 
a news organization. Many bloggers and Internet commentators smugly anticipating the death of newspapers -- there's a definite 
generational edge to the rivalry -- are essentially parasites.

Seems like it would be easy for a paper to exist of they didn't have to pay for paper, ink, transportations costs, etc.
I disagree with Gene about people paying for online content.  I pay $15 a month for the Tulsa World's dead tree edition, 
which only gets read if Mrs. Bart wants to find a local Herbfest or those back yard water-feature contests.

The problem is, THEY DON'T PUT EVERYTHING ONLINE, which is total horseshit.

Instead of dying, why don't they at least TRY to stay in business by putting everything in their dead trees edition online?
One of the worst offenders us USA Whore Today.  I'll read something, then I'll want to put it on the page so I search for it
online - but it's not there and I'll be damned if I'll spent half a day re-typing an entire story.

Even if it's an important, front page story, the bastards at USA Today refuse to give their customers what they want.

I assume the papers write their stories on computers, so their refusal to give me what I want is INTENTIONAL.
Since that's the case, I'll feel less sorry for them when they go under.

No doubt some lunkhead lawyer advised them NOT to give the customer what he wants - so they're dying.
Wait, no, newspapers aren't dying, they choosing to commit suicide.

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

We have broken the $2,000 level!
Thanks to all who have been so generous.

I know what you're thinking...
"I like Ol' Bart, been reading him for years,
maybe I should send him a 'love' check."

Fact is - about 2% contribute.
Ergo, ipso facto - times are tough.
Help Bart's dreams take wing!
Things are so bad, I'm shaving the kitties to sell the fur!
(That's a Bob Dole joke)

to bartcop@bartcop.com

 OR send a 'love' check to

 PO Box 54466
 Tulsa, OK  74155

Random thought...

This is for Danny I-was-gonna-donate-but-now-I'm-not Detroit, who
(I have to guess since he hasn't made his position clear) throws a hissy
when somebody criticizes the bad decisions Detroit has made the last 25 years?

Who's fault is it that more drivers won't buy American cars?

Danny's reply:

Why would I spend 2 hours trying to explain (type) what you should already realize when all you will do 
is edit it, scrap it or ignore it?  When you complained about the “janitor” that made 65 grand one year.
I sent you a very detailed, day in the life of an autoworker story and all you could do was throw a hissy fit 
about my so called sarcasm. Print that one so your readers can walk through a “janitors” 8-10 hour day. 

I can’t sit here and try to justify the mentality of dealership service write up guys or bonus baby CEO’s, 
but I sure can stand up for those of us that get up at 5 AM day in and day out to make the cars that the 
brain trust tells us to make. My guess is that most people that buy the totally over rated Toyotas and Hondas 
nowadays either had sour experiences with the lemon mobiles of the 80’s or just can’t stand the fact that a 
“broom pusher” makes more than they do. The 2 people I know that support Tokyo more than Detroit 
fit the bill on both points. One is dumb enough to pay over $400 a month on a Lexus (glorified Toyota with 
stolen Mercedes engineering), and the other still believes his Camry is better than a Malibu, Grand Prix, 
Fusion, Avenger or several other American models that are available. American cars are the best again, 
and if anyone doubts how strong American car manufacturing makes our economy, they just don’t get it.

Danny, so, they got burned by lemon mobiles of the eighties and turned towards Japan for relief?

I guessing that they didn't get burned by their nineties Japanese purchase so they rewarded Japan 
by sticking with them when they traded in their cars that worked just fine.

Seems like you should be angry with the circumstances - i.e. it rained on your wedding day,
but your anger seems illogically aimed at everyone who had the sense to buy the better car.

What can anyone do to change that?

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

 Subject: Hello from Honduras

 Bart, back in January I hosted a party at my small café to watch Obama get inaugurated, and I got ~75 people 
 to show up in a place that usually maxes out at around 30-40.  I gave away free food and served mimosas and Bloody Marys 
(Chinaco is unheard of here), and when Obama said, “People are watching this from around the world,” a cheer went up.
 Attached is a shot of us toasting President Barack Hussein Obama, and a shameless plug for my café.  
 I’ll give free drinks to anyone mentioning they saw this on Bartcop!
  Best regards,
  Jeff, Owner of Cafe Mariposa


 Damn, and I thought Tulsa was nice ...

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

Excellent - I wish I could read the artist's name.
Looks like Birmingham News...

Random thoughts...

I lost the e-mail that suggested this, but one way to stop piracy?
Use our satellites to locate ANY small boat that's more than, say, 50 miles off shore,
then we send them to meet Allah, which is doing them a favor - right?
Is there any reason for a small boat to be 50 miles out on the high seas?

  Send e-mail to Bart  | Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

 Subject: 2009 World Series of Poker

I got hired as a dealer for the WSOP this year, they are having a 1,000 dollar buy in event, that's cheaper then normal.
It's being called the "Stimulus Special" Sat. May 30th.   The rest of the schedule can be found at Worldseriesofpoker.com

If the money for the Bartcop WSOP dream slows down you should offer folks half their donation as action,
somebody gives you 100 dollars, give them 5% of any winnings you make, etc. etc.
--Mike the Dealer.

 Mike, that's a great idea - let's do that (or I may never get to $1000 :)
 Each $100 donated gets you 5% of my winnings.
 AND, for $300, I'll wear your logo on my cap at the final table

 Join Team Bartcop to make this once-in-a-lifetime dream come true.

to bartcop@bartcop.com

 OR send a 'love' check to

 PO Box 54466
 Tulsa, OK  74155

 We have reached 55% of our WSOP goal.

  I'll donate to your seat at the WSOP, Bart!  | Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

Marty's Entertainment Page

Marty always has good stuff.

Click on the E!

Need to take a sudden trip?

 Here's the deal:

Now with working link!!

Piggy Piggy Quotes

"I love dreams; dreams led to inventions, led to this country. 
  But hope is a different thing. Hope, in many cases, is simply 
  an excuse for not doing anything."
     -- Captain Methane, pretending that makes sense    

Piggy Piggy Quotes

"You know what we have learned about the Somali pirates? The merchant marine organizers 
  that were wiped out by the order of Barack Obama on Sunday? They were teenagers."


 Really Rush?
 The Somalian pirates are "marchant marine organizers?"

 How does this insane man stay on the air?

   Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

How Stupid is Stymie?



Clarence "Slappy" Thomas believes he is dumber than all the other justices and a good number of law professors, 
and retreats into isolation ("I tend to be morose sometimes") to nurse his wounds and brood. What an awful purgatory 
of an existence: to know you are a fraud, to know that everyone else knows you are a fraud, and yet to be locked into 
your job more or less for life. It's enough to ruin a person. And it appears it has.

From the New York Whore Times:

“I am rounding the last turn for my 18th term on the court,” he added, but his work — “this endeavor,” he called it,
“or, for some, an ordeal” — has not gotten easier. “That’s one thing about this job,” he said. “You get a little tired.”

Sound familiar? "It's hard work." No wonder Bush appointed him. Two peas...

Then he goes on to expound on the mystical powers of G.E.:

“It seems that many have come to think that each of us is owed prosperity and a certain standard of living. 
They’re owed air conditioning, cars, telephones, televisions.”

Those are luxuries, Justice Thomas said.
“I have to admit,” he said, “that I’m one of those people that still thinks the dishwasher is a miracle. What a device! 
Because I think that way, I like to load it. I like to look in and see how that dishes were magically cleaned.”

Clarence, are you say the dishes magically clean themselves?
Even without you praying for them to be clean?

And how tiring can it be to rubber-stamp Scalia's opinions?

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

 Subject: Re Bob Parry and Hillary Clinton


 Hillary is a Neo Conservative. Nafta Cafta Shafta.
 Why do you think they wanted to take over Kosovo
 and put a gangster in charge of it?
  Mike D.

 Mike, in what decade is this Kosovo outrage happening?
 Plus, I'm a gambling man and if we were in the same room,
 I'd bet you $100 you couldn't even give me the fundamentals
 on that cutesy Nafta Cafta Shafta  horseshit.
 And if Hillary was/is so guilty,
 why couldn't Parry attack her with the truth?

 Why did he have to play the mind-reading card to explain her future crimes to us?

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog


"Mel Gibson and his wife are getting a divorce. 
  She’s blames infidelity; he blames the Jews."
    -- Letterman,

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

Republican Pants On Fire


I've been on lie patrol this week. And I suggest ya'll join me as I stand guard at the border between 
what's really happening now and what the right wing liars say is happening right now.

Republicans are in a bind. They are out of power and no longer have access to the Bully Pulpit from which 
they assured us for 8-years that our lying eyes were indeed, lying to us. You know like when they used to say
the best way to regulate the financial services industry was not to regulate at all. Or when they assured us that 
Saddam not only had weapons of mass destruction, but they knew where they were. Or when they told us that 
cutting $1.6 trillion from the tax bills of the super-rich would spark a roaring. economy. That kind of stuff.

  Send e-mail to Bart  | Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

 Subject: Fagot!!

Hi there, Fartcock!!....I mean bartcop!
You are nothing but a no good Fagot lovin', American hate bitch!

I'm an honest importer of olive oil, nothing more.

I bet you would suck Obama's cock wouldnt you.

Did you mean "I would bet?"
I'd love to gamble with a Monkey like you.
Do you make a lot of money?

From what I've read on you web page, you probably make about $20,000 a year,

I wish.

Live on food stamp, and have a lot of time on your hands to come up with some of
the most elementary type politics that only people that live ghettos would find educating.

You're half-right - I apparently have no wealthy readers. :)
If I was a Fascist dog Republican I'd be bathing in Cristal champagne.

What is it like knowing that you voted for someone that only fagots, illegals, ciminals
and the most poorly educated people in America voted for.

ha ha
You just called a majority of voters "fagots, illegals, and ciminals,"
No wonder you handjobs can't win an election.
No wonder you lost the White House and the Senate and the House.

BTW, did you have a big fight with spelling and punctuation?
Maybe you should call them and apologize.

Which means in my point of view, (He means "from" my point of view)
that you liberals share the same views of   (He means "as")
the scum of the earth,  (I'm nothing like the Bush bastards)
welfare recipants, (He means the big oil companies)
people in prison, (Scooter Libby got pardoned, remember?)
abortoinists (He means Nancy Reagan, Pickles Bush and the twins)
(people who do not take responsibity for their sexual behavior) (He means Monkey Bush)
even animals have more morals about their cubs, puppies etc...  (He means Laura Schlessinger)

   "I am my mom's kid..."

 John Murphy

PS. Want to see a picture of my son?

 I gotta admit - that's a cute kid.

 He must take after you - his head is smaller than that baseball.
 He might have your rhetorical skills (too bad) but I'd bet he can
 climb the fuck outa trees - am I right?

 BTW, what zoo is his mother in?

    Send e-mail to Bart  | Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

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 Subject: Hello from northern Afghanistan

Hi Bart
I read you like to get pictures from around the world..
Here is a group of goat herders, near Mazar-e-Sharif.

I first met my good friend Julio at Vegasfest 2002.

He was a NY cop who told me between shifts of digging thru the 9-11 rubble,
he would read  bartcop.com  to try to push the horror out of his mind.
That brought me to tears.  (then and now)

Now he's in Afghanistan, helping Obama rout those al-Qaeda bastards.

A shot of Chinaco for you, old friend.


  Send e-mail to Bart  | Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

Subscribe to Bartcop

Why subscribe?

 There are 151 shows online to listen to.

That's a lot of BCR

You can select a monthly plan to provide recurring support.
Please sign up for whatever you can afford.
(10% of your gross is the usual tithe.)

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from   Crooks & Liars

This, from the leader of the GOP?
 How does he stay on the air?
Is there nothing he can say to anger his sheep?

 Subject: tea bagging handjobs

Hey Bart, if the tea baggers are soooo concerned with gov’t spending,  
I am glad they agree that:

We should reduce the Pentagon budget, and
We should defund warrentless wiretapping.
  Jack in Jacksonville, Alabamastan

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog

Check out the toons and stuff

 on the Bart Blog!

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Things are so bad, I'm shaving the kitties to sell the fur!
(That's a Bob Dole joke)

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Worldwide Bartcop

They read it in Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia 

They read it in Truth or Consequences, New Mexico

They read it in Naberezhnyye Chelny, Russia 

They read it in Dallas, Texas

They read it in Henley-in-Arden, UK 

  Want to sell stuff everywhere?

 Why sell just to America when you can sell to the whole world?

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Subject: Donation

Bart, you wrote:

> Tuesday, I set a record for the most women 
> in a room with me when I had no pants :) 

That line is worth a few bucks!!!!
 John in Florida

John, thanks for that.

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or send a "love" check to
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Tulsa, OK  74155

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Pop Singer Louise Rednapp - Can't make it in America?


 The case FOR her making it

 Check out hundreds of  Louise  pictures  at BC Hotties

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BCR Show #151HOT

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...  Thanks to yb for the fine Shirley picture

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