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BCR #159 is here
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 Weekend-Monday   Nov 21-23,  2009    Vol 2430 - 720-898-9019 

Quote of the Day

"Sarah Palin got a sore hand from signing 
  so many books. She had to call Rush 
  Limbaugh to get some OxyContin."
      -- Letterman


In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Arrow The KSM trial worries the GOP HOT
Arrow Glenn Beck - politician? HOT
Arrow Obama - Start being a Leader HOT
Arrow Pit Bull in the China Shop  HOT
Arrow St. Sarah of Wasilla 
Arrow Sully getting 'rock star sex' HOT
Arrow Prejean has EIGHT sex tapes 
Arrow Eliza Dushku's show cancelled  



"I meet with the gays here and there. They were in my house two weeks ago. 
  I donít mind gays. But I donít want Ďem stuffing it down my throat all the time."
     -- Utah Senator Chris Butters, using the GOP's favorite metaphor,     Link

 If we take Butters at his word, 
 he doesn't want gays shoving "it" down his throat "all the time."

  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

Why the KSM trial worries the GOP
 by Ted Rall


Never mind the Constitution, the Geneva Conventions or common decency--on the question of what to do 
about POWs rotting away at Guantánamo Bay concentration camp, right-wingers' concerns are purely practical.

We are talking, of course, about AG Eric Holder's decision to try Khalid Sheikh Mohammed in Manhattan, 
within walking distance of the World Trade Center Memorial Hole, which marks America's resilience...

I don't refer to Mohammed as "9/11 mastermind." Unlike most Americans, I don't believe that something is true 
just because the government says it. Until a jury and the media examine the facts, we have no idea whether Mohammed 
is guilty of anything. As far as we know, he could be nothing more than a poster child for Pakistani bed-head. Moreover, 
my distrust multiplies in direct proportion to the number times a suspect has been waterboarded (in KSM's case, at least 183).

Anyway, it's interesting to watch "law and order" conservatives like Rudy Giuliani talk away basic legal rights like habeas corpus. 
"Mohammad should be tried in a military tribunal," Giuliani says, "He is a war criminal. This is an act of war."   No, Mr. Mayor, he's not. 
And this is no war. Had an actual war been declared, a nation-state would have attacked us. 9/11 was a criminal act, and a terrible one: 
mass murder, air piracy and property damage. Until Khalid Sheikh Mohammed is tried and convicted in a court of law, however he is 
an alleged criminal, innocent until proven guilty. Where'd this Giuliani guy go to law school, Wal-Mart?

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"What weíre experiencing now is really a ticking time bomb that they designed about 100 years ago, 
  beginning in the progressive movement. And they thought, "you know what, if we just do this and this 
  and this and this, over time if we do it in both the Republican and Democratic parties, we will have our 
  socialist utopia." Well, I am drafting plans now to bring us back to an America that our founders 
  would understand...We need to start thinking like the Chinese."
      -- Glenn Beck,     Link

    Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

 Subject: Fat Tony Scalia

Bart, Fat Tony said,

"Did any provision of the Constitution guarantee a right to abortion?
  Did any provision in the Constitution guarantee a right to homosexual sodomy? Same answer."

Well, did any provision of the Constitution guarantee nine seats on the Supreme Court?
Did any provision of the Constitution end slavery?
Did any provision of the Constitution allow women to vote?

Same answer.

That's why we have the Court, and why we have Constitutional amendments.
The Constitution--including its amendments--has very little in the way of specific guarantees.
It does, however, limit what Government can do -- and that could easily be interpreted as
ensuring the government does not ban abortion and does not ban homosexual sodomy.

Maybe if Scalia's wife would introduce him to sodomy he'd calm down.

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It was one year ago...

Glenn Beck - politician?
Please, God, make that happen - please


Glenn Beck, the outspoken Fox News handjob, says he wants to go beyond broadcasting his opinions 
and start rallying his political base - formerly known as his audience - to take action.

In an interview, he said he would promote voter registration drives and sponsor a series of seven conventions 
across the country featuring what he described as libertarian speakers.

On Saturday he held a festive campaign-style rally north of Orlando, in which he promoted his book, "Arguing With Idiots," 
and announced another book to come next August filled with right-leaning policy proposals gathered from the conventions.

Beck provided few details about his plans for the tour, making it unclear if he truly intends to prod his audience 
of millions into political action or merely burnish his media brand ahead of a book release.

Beck did say the conventions would resemble educational seminars, ha ha and he emphasized that while candidates 
may align themselves with the values and principles that he espouses, he would not take the next step to endorse them.

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Bart Cop slams man into window - blood everywhere 

 Subject: No communion for Kennedy?

Now that Bishop Thomas Tobin has banned Patrick Kennedy from receiving communion because he's supports 
a woman's right to control her own reproduction, I have a question for him. Are you willing to deny communion to 
priests who have sex with children? I'm curious to see how your values on child rape compare to abortion. 

The way I see it, it's people like you who make me say, "Thank God I'm an Atheist". 
So - prove me wrong. I challenge you. 
Should priests who rape children also be denied communion?

Marc Perkel
Founder of the Church of Reality
"Reality Based Voter"

These guys are Rethugs first, and priests second.
They're about as true to their God as I am.

Is there anybody in America who's serious about being Catholic?

Take uber Catholic, Mel Gibson, please.

He dumped his wife for a hot, young girl and I'll bet he's still getting communion.
Rumor is he's paying his ex-wife $1M a month to not make any noise.

Catholicism is a fraud.

It's all a shell game to steal your money and rape your kids.
Why can't people see the truth?

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Black only, comes in all sizes.
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"It took years for Alaska to achieve victory. As governor, I directed our attorney general to write 
  an amicus brief in the case, and, thanks to Alaska's able attorneys arguing in front of the Supreme 
  Court, that ruled in favor of the people. Finally, Alaskans could recover some of their losses."
     -- Sarah Palin, taking credit for bringing down Exxon,    Link

"That is the most cockamamie bullshit. She didn't have a 
  damn thing to do with it, and she didn't know what it was about." 
     -- Dave Oesting of Anchorage, the lead plaintiff attorney in the private litigants' civil case against Exxon, 
         on Sarah Palin's account of the lawsuit against Exxon over the 1989 Valdez disaster,    Link

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"Iím very disappointed. I think it was very rude. She could have at least apologized, and she didnít even do that."
     -- Teresa Hedrick, who stood in the rain all day waiting for Sarah Palin to arrive at a book-signing, 
          complaing about Palin quitting before signing books for everyone in line,   Link

"We gave up our entire workday, stayed in the cold. My kids were crying. They went home with my wife. 
  She was out here in the freezing cold all day. I feel like I donít want to support Sarah."
     -- Angry man who stood in the cold rain trying to get Palin's autograph,   Link

"We bought two books from Borders to have our receipt and our wristband 
  to get it signed tonight. My books are going back to Borders tomorrow."
     -- Angry woman who stood in line at a Sarah Palin book-signing but didn't get her books signed,   Link

" 'Hardcore patriots' are people that wait in line for a quitters signature." 
     -- Xisithrus,   Link

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Obama - Start being a Leader


Obama is on a short leash at this point. His fans, and I was one of those who was willing to give him a shot last November, 
are mostly giving up on him. Activists are already turning on him. My union friends are disgusted. My African-American friends 
just shake their heads in dismay. Liberal friends act embarrassed. A leftist friend, retired, who devoted a month to campaigning 
for Obama full time now writes angry letters almost weekly to Obama's former campaign manager David Plouffe and others, 
blasting Obama's handling of the bank crisis and his Afghan War plans. Clearly Obama cannot continue to appease 
Republicans and cater to Blue Dogs in Congress and expect to be re-elected in 2012.

Does anyone disagree with that last sentence?

Indeed, if he doesn't toss the crooks and charlatans in the Fed, the Treasury and his Council of Economic Advisers out, a
nd doesn't stop listening to the self-serving crazies in the military, he won't even have a Dem majority in Congress next year.

President Obama, aren't you tired of being an embarrassment to your friends and family? 
Aren't you tired of being mocked by your foes?

Come on. We're sick of your speeches! Suck it up, be a leader finally and kick some butt. Do something unconventional and daring. 
End the wars, bring the troops home, announce a huge jobs program, issue an executive order expanding the Medicare program, 
raise taxes on the wealthy to back where they were in the 1960s, and let's get the country moving forward again.

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"I want to know who our president is. And to date, I donít think I know, I donít think a lot of people know, 
  I donít think itís ever been asked - answered... When this Fort Hood massacre occurred, and I saw the response 
  of our Commander in Chief to this unbelievable, politically correct, nonsense - to me it was just enough."  
        -- incoherent handjob Phil Wolf, who put up a racist birther billboard above his car dealership,
            Wolf Automotive in Wheat Ridge Colorado, because he hates niggers and he's proud of it,   Link  another link

  "If you're white and Republican and need a used car, visit Wolf Automotive in Wheat Ridge Colorado  
    and remember, that nigger in the White House caused the Fort Hood massacre."

 If anybody knows who Obama is, please call Phil at 720-898-9019


'We've got to recall our country, the election. This guy (Obama), is illegal. 
  If I had a snake in the house, I would kill it..." 
    -- Phil Wolf, birther handjob who knows how to handle snakes and "niggers."


"Whadda ya bet Wolf has a GM dealership that was saved by the jihadist president?" 
    --  EIBruce,     Link


"Hey, Mr Wolf. Did you put up a billboard asking for details about 
  George W. Bushís national Guard service? Or his DUI and drug use?" 
   -- Zooey,    Link


"Anyone who thinks questions about Obama arenít being asked, or sufficiently answered, 
  the question they really want asked isnít directed towards Obama, but towards America: 
 'How the hell did you people elect a nigger to be your president?'"
    --  slappy magoo    Link

 If you're white, please call Phil at 720-898-9019 (No negroes, please.)

 Note: When I called, I accidentally transposed two numbers and some lady answered.
 I asked if this was Wolf Automotive and, from her reaction, I could tell she's plenty tired
 of getting phone calls - and I didn't even have the right number.

 So I called the right number and asked, "Is this racist handjob Wolf Automotive?"
 The guy listened to me for a few minutes then said, "I'm sorry you feel that way" and hung up.
 Have you ever seen a guy with a public business fuck up this bad?
 He just told 70% of Colorado, "I don't want your business!"

 I just had an idea:
 If he sells new cars with a 60-day, bring-it-back, no questions policy,

 let's ALL go to Denver and buy a car and drive to Vegas - and then return it.

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Click for more info or to order

Subject: you're wrong about Spc. Hutchinson's plight HOT


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A comedian's dream
or American nightmare?


State Marijuana Penalties

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The Pit Bull in the China Shop
 by Frank Rich


Even by the standard of politicians, this is a woman with an outsized ego. Combine that with her performance skills 
and an insatiable hunger for the limelight, and you can see why she will not stay in Wasilla now that sheís seen 30 Rock. 
The question journalists repeatedly asked last week - What are Palinís plans for 2012? - is a red herring. Palin has no 
obligation to answer it. She is the pit bull in the china shop of American politics, and she can do what she wants, on her 
own timeline, all the while raking in the big bucks she couldnít as a sitting governor. No one, least of all her own political
party, can control her...

Culture is politics. Palin is at the red-hot center of age-old American resentments that have boiled up both from the ascent 
of our first black president and from the intractability of the Great Recession for those Americans who haven't benefited 
from bailouts. As Palin thrives on the ire of the left, so she does from the disdain of GOP leaders who belittle her as a lightweight.

The only person who can derail Palin is Palin herself. Should she not self-destruct, she will doom GOP hopes of a 2012 comeback. 
But the rest of the country cannot rest easy. The rage out there is larger than Palin and defies partisan labeling.

 Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

Subject: your football analogy

Bart, you wrote:

>"In football, when the defense jumps offside, the offense geta a free play.  This is like that.
> The Democrat, whoever he/she is, will win Florida's goober election in 2010."

But...the offense has to snap the ball to get that free play.
 Tom G

Good point.
Democrats wouldn't want to take advantage of their opponent's mistakes.

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If I was advising Sarah Palin...

...the rule would be "Pants on at all times."

Pants should be worn in public,
not used a a foot-warmer.


"I'm prepared to vote against any bill as long as a government-run public option is included."  
     -- Sen Blanche Lincoln (D-Backstabber),   Link

"One out of every five people in Arkansas lacks health insurance coverage."
     -- Center for American Progress,   Link

"Fuck those people - do you know how much money I get from the insurance lobby?"  
     -- Sen Blanche Lincoln (D-Backstabber), 

"SweetJeezus! Just where do these people get the idea that they can defy their own caucus 
  on procedural votes?  Why is Reid even entertaining such threats? These audacious pissants 
  should understand that they are Democrats or they suffer the consequences. Period. "   
     -- SleepinJeezus, wishing our Democratic leaders had some kind of spine.    Link

"I feel sorry for Reid, but there is not a single leadership vein in his nerves." 
     -- kash79,   Link    

"Does it get any worse than spineless Harry Reid?  I'm considering a 
  move to Las Vegas just so I can vote against the sacless wonder."
     -- Bartcop 

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St. Sarah of Wasilla


Anyone who has tried to fathom the Palin phenomenon is eventually surprised that she bothers to speak at all. 
But she loves talking, to the delight of her fans and to the utter befuddlement of anyone who regards languge 
as a serious medium of communication.

 ha ha
Words are not Sarah Palinís currency, nor would she command her immense army of ardent followers if she had 
a ďway with words.Ē When asked about ďissues,Ē Palin either recites an irrelevant aspect of her biography (looking across 
the Bering Strait at Vladimir Putin, covering high school hockey games for the Mat-Su Valley Frontiersman), or she rattles off 
a mind-numbing series of talking points, seemingly memorized off a laminated card handed to her by Grover Norquist.
Asked about any domestic problem - education, unemployment, breast cancer, etc. - she advocates cutting taxes. 
Given problems of a more metaphysical nature, she will come around to invoking Jesus...
There are no lies in Sarahís book; nor in her life, nor in her heart. Utterances that seem untrue are not lies, because Sarah 
believes them true. If she says one thing, then later forgets what she said and says the opposite, Sarah Palin is neither lying
nor mistaken, nor forgetful, because at each moment, she believes what she has said. And a minute later, she will believe 
something else, if she says it. Whatever she says, if she says it, will be true. But if itís not, so what? Itís words, only words.
Sooner or later, words fail everyone. This goes double for Sarah and her faithful. 
Sarah Palin is the voice - and the embodiment - of the inarticulate.

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 Help  survive!


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SNL's  Palin 2012  video

Angry Crowd Jeers Lazy Palin
for not signing enough autpgraphs - video

I saw a few seconds of her first book signing.
When she appeared, she was waving that poor Downs Syndrome kid around again like a semaphore.

Why is she allowed to do something in such poor taste?

She's using her baby to remind people that she's a staunch pro-lifer
but she's unquestionably using him for political purposes.

Isn't that what she asked Letterman NOT to do to her kids?

What if, to remind people he was shot four times in Vietnam,
Wesley Clark took off his shirt at the beginning of every speech?
Wouldn't the press ask him why he was doing such a bizarre thing?

She did that all last year - they'd introduce her and she would run out waving her son over her head.
Then, after everyone got a good look, Todd the dutifull eunuch would pop up and "relieve her."

Here's how they could cure that:
Have someone scathing like Kathy Griffin or Wanda Sykes cover the rally.

Then, just before Sarah comes out, have her speculate, "I wonder if she's going to
wave that kid around like a "We're Number One" finger, then pass him off to Todd?"

Then when she does this, they all giggle and say, "We told you so."

Necessary reminder:
I'm not attacking the poor kid, I'm attacking his mother's narcissistic bullshit.
and the media's complicit cowardice for not calling her on it.

Remember how they covered for Bush all those years?
Doing their standups from "the ranch" in front of a bale of hay?

Idiot voters buy that symbolic horseshit by the truckload.

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Sanford facing 37 ethics charges

      "I'm soooo fucked..."


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Subject: more Dr. Babs?


Surely there are other people who write to you about 9/11?
The "no-planes" theory is bad enough (there were hundreds if not thousands
of witnesses who saw "planes"), but now the laser beam thing again?

You make a good point - that some wealthy Democrats should fund a credible investigation
- but it's sullied by spreading unsupported bullshit. Next you'll be embedding clips from "Loose Change."
 Wes in Baltimore

Wes, one thing we know for sure, the Bush bastards lied about what really happened.

Take the gangsters who financed Hitler, give them the power of the US government,
give them unlimited money and the powers of the CIA and you definitely have a conspiracy.

When dealing with the Bush bastards, one must throw out conventional thinking.

True evil + unlimited power and unlimited money = things we can't imagine.

Would the Bush bastards stoop to mass murder for unlimited power and money?

I say yes.

Subject: Dr. Babs

Hi Bart,

I don't doubt Bush and co. sat on their asses when they could've prevented 9/11, but the person writing you
about laser weapons and holographic plane images needs to lay off the acid.    Could she actually use reliable
sources to determine this?  Occam's razor means nothing to these people.

I'm not sure Occam's razor applies to the CIA with an unlimited black budget.
They can murder anyone, even the president, and then blame whatever patsy is standing nearby.

When people make all these claims about how it's "not possible" for huge planes to destroy a building designed
to handle far smaller, slower planes, it's important to ask them how it feels to oppose the scientific consensus.

That's why I was so disappointed in the 9-11 program.
Instead of asking pointed questions to rational scientists, they talked to angry mobs, instead.
Their intention was to ridicule anyone who disagrees with Lee Hamilton's Whitewash.

Dems are the party of science and logic, and it should stay that way.

I hate Bush as much as anyone does, but there's no need to exaggerate his role in wrecking the entire world.
It just hurts our side, just like "progressives" who support Ron Paul without bothering to check his voting record.

This is my favorite site for debunking, which even includes video footage showing the media
already *expected* WTC 7 to collapse:

Keep hammerin'.
 Johnny in Dallas

Too bad Obama's into "looking forward."
That means we'll never know the extent of the Bush crimes.

And we'll never know the extent of the next GOP criminals because we've established the precedent
that you ONLY go after Democrats with girlfriends - not Rethugs who kidnap, murder, rape and torture.

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Marty's has new stuff every day
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Marty always has good stuff.


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Mike Malloy Live

Sully getting 'rock star sex'


Pilot Chesley Sullenberger jokes that his heroic handling of a disabled jetliner brought him 
"rock star sex" in an interview for "Whore NBC's People of the Year" TV special.

Matt Lauer asked Sullenberger and his wife, Laurie, whether his sudden celebrity helped or hurt their relationship.

"Hero sex really helps a 20-year-old marriage," Laurie Sullenberger said with a laugh.

"Rock star sex," Chesley Sullenberger chimed in.

"After 20 years, I'm once again getting oral," presumedly from his wife.

Remember Al Franken's joke during impeachment?
"Yes, oral sex is sex and I know for sure because 
  I haven't gotten any since we've been married."

So much of sex in America is filtered thru the I-hate-myself GOP.

Oral sex is wrong and evil, 


...but 4,500 dead soldiers is acceptable and Bush is a good man.

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Subject: BCR 159

I love to listen to BC radio on the way to work.

Great teabagger rant. I enjoy your frustration of  trying to make sense of an insane person's blather.

These people are probably 50/50 plants and mindless robots  that are  easily manipulated by the fascist dogs in power.
What a sick and cynical agenda of creating the turmoil, then convincing their sheep that it's caused by the (fill in the blank).

I guess nothing will change until people stop being proud of being stupid.

Somehow you make it all funny.
 Rick in Fullerton CA

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Prejean has EIGHT sex tapes


On Friday, Radar online revealed that the sex tape Carrie Prejean has called "the worst mistake of my life" was in fact
a series of 8 explicit videos and 30 lewd photos all self-produced by the publicity whore.   TMZ says that Vivid Entertainment
has offered Prejean "millions of dollars" for the right to distribute "erotic footage that Carrie Prejean produced in February 2007."

Meanwhile, the boyfriend told reporters that he received a call last week from Carrie's reps asking him to lie and say the
publicity whore was 17 when the tapes were created. Though it would be awfully convenient for Prejean's camp if she was
actually underage in these vids--she'd be a minor and it would be illegal to show them--but she was 19 and 20.

Her sex tape doesn't really hurt anybody. However, it does become dangerous when there's massive hypocrisy involved,
when the slut who made the porn is also trying to make money off being a highly moral public face of Christian values.
It's also a problem when this same young woman is holding herself up as a role model for young girls and suing for
religious discrimination when she seems to be faking or at least badly following, her religiousness.

Here's the deal:   Those tapes ARE coming out, with or without her permission.  If she agrees to settle for
a big chunk of cash, she makes the money AND can exercise some form of control over their distribution.

If she doesn't agree to a deal, those tapes are coming out (from an off-shore company)
with a revenge theme guaranteed to put her in the worst possible light, if that's possible.

Her options are limited, but that's what happens 
when you drop your pants and masturbate for a camera.

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Subject: BCR 159's Bob Dylan concert review

Dear Bob:

I've seen Dylan over the years since 1979, and have gradually come to the following conclusions.

1.  Dylan hasn't given a straight answer to an interview question since 1961.  It's all a put-on to him.

2.  As a rock vocalist, he actually was good from 1964-76.  Since then, not so much.

3.  The songs he sings clearly are the only ones he cares about.  The rest are deliberately sabotaged
as part of his running joke on his audience.  One of his best overall performances was on his gospel tour of 1979,
when he sang not a single one of his earlier songs, but had a crack band and really took care with the unfamiliar material.

4.  Bob's only out there to entertain himself.  For crying out loud, he doesn't need the money.
His songs are so widely covered, he never needs to step on a stage again.

Subject: Dylan concert review

Hey Bart, I had to laugh at your take on the Bob Dylan concert you attended.
He can sing clearly, and on key if he feels like it, but anyone who has followed
his career at all could tell you he rarely has ever felt like it.

He is no doubt a great songwriter. He is also never been a good live performer.
Iíve seen him on stage with some of the great musicians like Clapton etc.
and itís still somewhat painful listening to him get through his part.

He is an icon and I think well deserved, but the best thing
about going to see him live is being able to say you did.
 Bill from CT

It would appear Bob's primary gift is his choice of words.

Maybe he should write books and let the live concert trail grow cold.

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  "If you're white and need a car, visit Wolf Automotive in Wheat Ridge Colorado  
    and remember, that nigger in the White House caused the Fort Hood massacre."

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I hate the Dallas Cowboys


I hate them more today than yesterday.

For the second week in a row, they failed to score in the first 7/8 of the game.
They finally got a touchdown in the fourth quarter.

Trouble is, the Redskins could only score 6 points all day.


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Bart, I hope this helps.
Obama needs to kick some ass.
I'm a little disappointed in him right now.
 Larry in MS.

Larry, he's gotta see the light soon, right?
We don't need another one-term Democrat.

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