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Wednesday, March 28, 2012 Vol 2850 - Uh dub he'p Whitey
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In
Today's Tequila Treehouse...
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Business slow?
Run a "We're Still Here, goddammit" Sale!
Think how many people/companies have
bitten the dust since Bush stole the Treasury.
Banner ads by the day,
by the week,
or by the monff
Click Here to get more Hits
Even if business is slow,
remind them why they need you!
Quotes
"Newt's kinda stupid t charge $50 for an autograph.
Even if he gets 10,000 people to agree to that, it's just $500K
and how long will that last him, 2-3 days?"
-- Carville
I know lots of Democrats hate Carville,
but he's almost always right.
Send e-mail to Bart
"Newt's kinda stupid t charge $50 for an autograph.
Even if he gets 10,000 people to agree to that, it's just $500K
and how long will that last him, 2-3 days?"
-- Carville
I know lots of Democrats hate Carville,
but he's almost always right.
Send e-mail to Bart
Hispanics hate Romney, too
Link
Willard's pledge to stick to the positions he has taken will hurt the bastard,
particularly with Hispanic voters over the question of immigration.
Immigration is perhaps the one issue where the gun-grabber has staked out the most
conservative position ever. His insistence last week - trying to tamp down a flap over
his dedication to conservative principles - that he will carry his conservative stances into
a general election essentially cuts off any chance he had to pivot this fall with Hispanic
voters, who polls say have all but written off Mr. Romney.
I agree.
Hispanics hate Romney.
Democrats hate Romney.
Women hate Romney.
The old hate Romney.
Blacks hate Romney.
Dogs hate Romney.
Rich, white millionaires and billionaires love Romney.
...yet our whore press says he'll beat Obama.
Send e-mail to Bart
Shop Online
Amazon.com sells everything
Someone bought a Goalrilla GLR GS 54 Basketball System
$939 (cheap) with FREE shipping
Amazon donated $37.00 to the Treehouse
I think everyone should have a Goalrilla
Thanks for using this link
Amazon.com sells everything
Find
your purchase then come
back here
and use this link
and they'll throw the Treehouse some pennies..
Someone bought a Goalrilla GLR GS 54 Basketball System
$939 (cheap) with FREE shipping
Amazon donated $37.00 to the Treehouse
I think everyone should have a Goalrilla
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Buy
online
make Free
Shipping your bitch
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link when you place the order.
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the Amazon link
to your Favorites Bar
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Supreme Court Hates Liberals
and they're not too fond of the poor, either
Link
Getting to the crux of challenges to Obama’s health care overhaul Tuesday, the Supreme Court spent
the second day of oral arguments grappling over whether the government can require Americans to buy
coverage — and making clear that they want the government to show limits to the newfound power it seeks.
In a two-hour hearing before a packed courtroom with arguments ranging from broccoli to cellphones,
the nine justices also wrestled with questions of whether the law merely regulates an existing health care
market or whether, for the first time, it forces people into a market.
At stake is the law’s individual mandate, which requires most Americans to obtain coverage or pay a penalty.
The administration says the mandate is necessary to fix the insurance market, while challengers say it crushes
individual liberty by requiring people to buy something just because they’re alive.
“That changes the relationship of the government to the individual in a very fundamental way,”
said Justice Anthony M. Kennedy, whose vote is considered the most pivotal.
I have four thoughts:
They
say Clarence "Slappy" Thomas hasn't said a word from the bench in years.What's that proverb, "Better to keep mouth shut and be suspected of being a fool,
than open your mouth and confirm it."
My good friend (and Whore Court
biographer) Jeffery Toobin opined that Slappy doesn't talk muchbecause he grew up speaking Gullah and he wasn't real good with English. I seem to remember his
1991 testimony about "this high-tech lynching" where he sounded like every other angry Black man.
Someone said
this effectively kills their GOP's plan to privatize Social
Security. The GOP plan hasalways been to stop government payments and have people buy private retirement accounts, but
the Whore Court is about to rule it ILLEGAL to force us to buy anything from the private sector.
Carville says if the Whore Court
follows orders from Boehner and Turtleboy and kills health care, voters will remember that Obama gave them health care, but the GOP fucked them out of it.
...but will Obama consider listing the facts to be impolite during the campaign?
Marty
has
new stuff every
day
on her fine, fine Entertainment Page
Marty's TV Listings are the best!
on her fine, fine Entertainment Page
Marty's TV Listings are the best!
Marty always has good stuff.
Quotes
"Rick Santorum said he’s no Etch-A-Sketch. He said what you see is what you get,
and also because turning the two knobs is a little too much like playing with boobies.”
-- Bill Maher
"Then Santorum held up the Etch-A-Sketch and Sarah Palin said, 'Hey, give me back my iPad.'”
-- Bill Maher
Send e-mail to Bart
Honestly, wouldn't most Republicans choose to be dead
than live in a world where "one of them" was president?
Rachel Maddow's new book 'Drift'
Click to Order
Rachel was on Howard Stern this morning.
It went just like you think it would.
Howard started with the compliments, how smart she is,
and then he started zeroing in on her with the lesbian questions.
She was mostly successful at not reveealing much, but she did say:
When she started in radio, she wanted to
be another Robin Quivers. She
met her partner of 13 years while in the tree stump removal business.Check her out - she had a PhD and was working in the dirt for a living.
Her
partner opened the door to to talk stumps and BOOM, it was love. Their
first date was Ladies Night at a shooting range.Rachel says she's very good with an AK-47.
Then she went crazy.Quotes
"I like guns, I'm a gun enthusiast, but I don't
own a gun because it wouldn't make me any safer."
-- Rachel the loves-guns, hates-guns liberal
We've all heard her MSNBC promo, "You are 22 times more likely to shoot yourself
or a family member if you keep a gun in the house," which is pure poppycock.
Rachel has no kids - is she going to go crazy and shoot herself or her partner? No.
Is she going to get drunk and play with her guns? No.
Is she the exciteable type who'd pick up a gun and be so nervous
that she'd probably shoot herself just holding the gun in her hand? No.
So how is a gun going to harm her or a loved one?
Granted, guns are not for everyone.
But Rachel is "good with guns," no kids in the house, plus she's a target.
A great-looking liberal lesbian might pose more of a temptation than an asshole
like Ted Nugent would be able to resist. Rachel should be aware of that.
Isn't she just rolling the dice and hoping she never needs a weapon?
Does she think 9-1-1 or prayer will help her if she wakes up in the middle
of the night to find some horny Teabagger climbing thru her bedroom window?
Send e-mail to Bart
This is what they
mean...
How to speak Gollah
In honor of Clarence "Slappy" Thomas
Link
Grammar
Morphology
The following sentences illustrate the basic verb tense and aspect system in Gullah:
Uh he'p dem — "I help them/I helped them" (Present/Past Tense)
Uh bin he'p dem — "I helped them" (past tense) [I've been helping them]
Uh gwine he'p dem — "I will help them" (future tense) [I'm going to help them]
Uh done he'p dem — "I have helped them" (perfect tense) [I've done helped them]
Uh duh he'p dem — "I am helping them" (present continuous) [I'm done helping them]
Uh binnuh he'p dem — "I was helping them" (past continuous) [I've been helping them]
Syntax
These sentences illustrate 19th-century Gullah speech:
Da' big dog, 'e bite'um — "That big dog, it bit him" (topicalization)
Duh him cry out so — "It is him cried out that way" (front focusing)
Uh tell'um say da' dog fuh bite'um — "I told him said that dog would bite him" (dependent clauses with "Say")
De dog run, gone, bite'um — "The dog ran, went, bit him" (serial verb construction)
Da' duh big big dog — "That is big big dog" (reduplication)
Funny, when I read each of those, I hear Slappy's voice.
No wonder he doesn't say much at the Supreme Court.
Maybe Bush 41 should've nominated a real American?
Send e-mail to Bart
Sarah Palin Nude
Link
Subject: What Obama should have argued in the Supreme Court
It amazes me as a non-lawyer how badly-trained lawyers can be when arguing legal cases in front of
the Supreme Court as the Obama Administration did. I'm no fan of the individual mandate but it's seems
rather obvious to me that anything that affects 17% of the economy comes under the Commerce Clause.
If I were the one arguing I would have said that the federal government requires hospitals to treat people
who can't pay. In doing so those costs are shifted to people who pay insurance. So there's already a federal
mandate. People like me are mandated to pay for the health care of people who choose not to pay for their
own treatment. So the change under Obamacare is that the government is mandating people pay for their
own insurance rather than mandating strangers pay for them through cost shifting.
If Obama's lawyer had made that argument then they
wouldn't have looked pathetic in front of the Supreme Court.
Marc Perkel
Watching Tuesday TV was torture.
CNN, FOX and MSNBC all said the guy arguing Obama's case was weak.
They called this upcoming ruling "one of the most important rulings in a generation,"
but it appeared as though our guy stayed out late Monday drinking cheap tequila.
He stumbled over the easiest-to-predict questions like his name was Romney.
Really?
We're going to have worse health care because Obama's asshole failed to prepare?
BTW, a shot of cheap Cuervo for Obama and the idiot middle class.
Every four years, tearful mothers come to town hall meetings and say,
"The cost of heath care is strangling us - can you please help?"
So the Democrat works up a plan to make things better.
Then the GOP screams, "but that's socialism" and the idiot middle class gets scared
and, like they are today, they turn against health care reform because the Republicans
were bribed by BIG PHARMA to scare them and acrew them.
Meanwhile, Obama's Democrats don't bother to fight for their own goddamn plan,
Bottom line:
A majority of people would rather do without health care
than hear FOX News call their health care plan "socialism."
Yeah, it makes you especial-y sick.
Send e-mail to Bart
Quotes
"I don't get the furor over that dead nigger with the hoodie.
Niggers die every day, so what's the big deal? It's just one nigger
If we're one nigger down, I can step outside and get you ten more right now."
-- What I hear when Republicans speak about Trayvon
Send e-mail to Bart
Check out the news and toons at
Read all about it!
on the Bart Blog!
Jane
Fonda to play Nancy Reagan
GOP heads are exploding all over America
Link
Jane Fonda is set to play Nancy Reagan in the movie "The Butler."
The Wrap has confirmed that Fonda has signed on for the part.
According to Variety, the actress and activist would appear in a few scenes as the first lady,
and the choice as Fonda doing Reagan could cast a political slant on the film. ha ha Ya think?
Some may argue that it's difficult to find a conservative actress in Hollywood,
Horse hockey!
Patricia Heaton is as right-wing as Jolie's Dad.
She makes Mel Gibson look like Martin Sheen.
...but Jane Fonda's history of progressive political activism sets her apart:
Nancy Reagan is lucky to have an actress as beautiful as Jane Fonda play her.
Send e-mail to Bart
Subject: Cheney's heart
bart,
Just imagine if you were Cheney's heart donor, sitting up there in
Heaven,
who thought that when he died he was providing this humanitarian
gift.
And
then he looks down and it's fuckin' Cheney the War Criminal who gets
the heart.
You go to Heaven and your heart winds up in Hell.
Eric X
That's God's sense of humor :)
Send e-mail to Bart
Premier Toonist
Wolf Grulkey
is running for
congress
Subject: Toonist Bill Day honored
Friends,
I have been deeply honored these last few days. The highly respected TV anchor Mearl Purvis
invited me to speak on my cartoons during her 9 o'clock newscast. Then the gifted wordsmith Tom Jones
of Smart City Memphis did a write-up on his blog. I offer you these two links for your enjoyment.
Thank you to all, Bill
Smart City Memphis Link:
Mearl Purvis interview:
Congrats to Bill Day.
Send e-mail to Bart
Bank of America: Too Crooked to Fail
by Matt Taibbi
Link
At least Bank of America got its name right.
The ultimate Too Big to Fail bank really is America, a hypergluttonous ward of the state whose
limitless fraud and criminal conspiracies we'll all be paying for until the end of time. Did you hear
about the plot to rig global interest rates? The $137 million fine for bilking needy schools and cities?
The ingenious plan to suck multiple fees out of the unemployment checks of jobless workers?
Take your eyes off them for 10 seconds and guaranteed, they'll be into some shit again: This bank is
like the world's worst-behaved teenager, running over kittens and fire hydrants on the way to Vegas
for the weekend, maxing out your credit cards in the three days you spend at your aunt's funeral.
They're out of control, yet they'll never do time or go out of business, because the government remains
creepily committed to their survival, like overindulgent parents who refuse to believe their 40-year-old
live-at-home son could possibly be responsible for those dead hookers in the backyard.
Send e-mail to Bart
by Matt Taibbi
Link
At least Bank of America got its name right.
The ultimate Too Big to Fail bank really is America, a hypergluttonous ward of the state whose
limitless fraud and criminal conspiracies we'll all be paying for until the end of time. Did you hear
about the plot to rig global interest rates? The $137 million fine for bilking needy schools and cities?
The ingenious plan to suck multiple fees out of the unemployment checks of jobless workers?
Take your eyes off them for 10 seconds and guaranteed, they'll be into some shit again: This bank is
like the world's worst-behaved teenager, running over kittens and fire hydrants on the way to Vegas
for the weekend, maxing out your credit cards in the three days you spend at your aunt's funeral.
They're out of control, yet they'll never do time or go out of business, because the government remains
creepily committed to their survival, like overindulgent parents who refuse to believe their 40-year-old
live-at-home son could possibly be responsible for those dead hookers in the backyard.
Send e-mail to Bart
We're
on Twitter and Facebook
If you follow 'Bartcop' on Twitter/Facebook
I'll send you a tweet/Facebook message
when each new issue goes up.
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when each new issue goes up.
New Feature
Can you guess the movie?
Link
Send e-mail to Bart
Subject: Jeb Bush
Jebbie is pretending he's a "compassionate conservative" like the bullshit lie Karl Rove
created for Jeb's idiot brother....Jebbie wants to stay out of the far right bullshit so he
can't be held to it, so he can get the independents votes (if the republicans have a split
convention or if he has to wait until 2016) - those fence sitting moderates are who he's after,
the which ever way the wind blows assholes - who don't have a clue what the definition of
ideology means - Jeb is a fucking corporate republican extremist with the same elitist ideology and agenda.
Al B
Send e-mail to Bart
Today's Mystery Car
Link
Subject: last issue's Mystery Car Link
Bart, that's a Bugatti Veyron, the fastest road-legal car in the world.
Its made in France and Bugatti is owned by Volkwagen, but you cant buy it from a VW dealer.
Chris
Send e-mail to Bart
The GOP's War on people of Color
We're fighting the anti-progress GOP - can you help?
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I Was Born in March/September Bart
Link
Subject: last issue's Mystery Car Link
Bart, that's a Bugatti Veyron, the fastest road-legal car in the world.
Its made in France and Bugatti is owned by Volkwagen, but you cant buy it from a VW dealer.
Chris
Send e-mail to Bart
The GOP's War on people of Color
We're fighting the anti-progress GOP - can you help?
You could PayPal something to bartcop@bartcop.com
Click to Subscribe or Donate
..
or you could send a "love" check tobartcop.com
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Thank you
I Was Born in March/September Bart
Thanks, they send me pennies...
Today's Mystery Celebrity
Link
Subject: last issue's Mystery Celebrity Link
Bart, that's Carrie Fisher with her Mom, Debbie Reynolds.
~ Tony in Philly
Send e-mail to Bart
Subject: My Brush with Greatness
Link
We need more Greatness stories
Subject: Pigboy joke
Obama, Romney, Rush Limbaugh and their pilot are flying in a small aircraft when the engines fail.
“Guys, we need to jump, but there are only two parachutes…” says the pilot.
Romney quickly grabs a pack, straps it on his back, pulls open the door and jumps.
Then the pilot whispers something into Limbaugh’s ears, and Limbaugh runs to the door and jumps.
Obama shakes his head at that and says, “Ok, we have one parachute left,
do you think we can jump together and survive?”
“No worries”, says the pilot, “We still have two. Mitt grabbed my backpack when he jumped.”
“I see”, says Obama. “But say…how did you get Rush to jump without a ‘chute??”
“I assured him that if Romney can be president, then pigs can fly.”
Thanks to Chris B
Send e-mail to Bart
Today's Mystery City
Link
Subject: last issue's mystery city
Bart, Last Issue's Mystery City is Soufriere, St. Lucia.
The two conical peaks in the background are the Pitons.
Mark with no last name
Send e-mail to Bart
Women don't mind paying more for health care,
as long as we're not "socialists"
you can do whatever you want with us.
The poor don't mind having f-ing zero money,
as long as we're not "socialists"
you can do whatever you want with us.
People don't mind dying from a lack of health care,
as long as we're not "socialists"
you can do whatever you want with us.
Today's History Mystery
Link
Subject: last issue's history mystery
Bart, Last Issue's History Mystery ?
That’s Michael Faraday, the discoverer of electromagnetic induction,
the foundation of all electrical machinery.
Richard in Holliston, MA
Send e-mail to Bart
In the sixties, this was nearly porn.
Subject: donation
Bart, here is some money to help,
Eric in Littleton, CO
Eric, thanks for that.
If some rich Democrat could throw $10,000-$25,000 my way
it would take the pressure off for the upcoming political season.
Think of the tax deduction!
I hate to spend every day trying to raise money.
If you're shopping online,
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Back-in-shape Kate Hudson
Check out over 100 sexy, tasteful photos of Kate Hudson in BC Hotties
Thanks to Blue in Seattle for helping me corral the hotties.
Shopping online?
Link
Subject: last issue's mystery city
Bart, Last Issue's Mystery City is Soufriere, St. Lucia.
The two conical peaks in the background are the Pitons.
Mark with no last name
Send e-mail to Bart
Women don't mind paying more for health care,
as long as we're not "socialists"
you can do whatever you want with us.
The poor don't mind having f-ing zero money,
as long as we're not "socialists"
you can do whatever you want with us.
People don't mind dying from a lack of health care,
as long as we're not "socialists"
you can do whatever you want with us.
Today's History Mystery
Link
Subject: last issue's history mystery
Bart, Last Issue's History Mystery ?
That’s Michael Faraday, the discoverer of electromagnetic induction,
the foundation of all electrical machinery.
Richard in Holliston, MA
Send e-mail to Bart
In the sixties, this was nearly porn.
Subject: donation
Bart, here is some money to help,
Eric in Littleton, CO
Eric, thanks for that.
If some rich Democrat could throw $10,000-$25,000 my way
it would take the pressure off for the upcoming political season.
Think of the tax deduction!
I hate to spend every day trying to raise money.
If you're shopping online,
it never hurts to check http://amzn.to/bartcop prices.
Back-in-shape Kate Hudson
Check out over 100 sexy, tasteful photos of Kate Hudson in BC Hotties
Thanks to Blue in Seattle for helping me corral the hotties.
Marty always has good stuff.
Shopping online?
Use this
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